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Petty Troubles of Married Life

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42 pages
The Project Gutenberg EBook of Petty Troubles of Married Life, Part First by Honore de BalzacThis eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it,give it away or re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online atwww.gutenberg.netTitle: Petty Troubles of Married Life, Part FirstAuthor: Honore de BalzacRelease Date: June 28, 2005 [EBook #6033]Language: English*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK MARRIED LIFE ***Produced by Dagny; and John BickersPETTY TROUBLES OF MARRIED LIFEPART FIRSTBYHONORE DE BALZACPREFACEIN WHICH EVERY ONE WILL FIND HIS OWN IMPRESSIONS OF MARRIAGE.A friend, in speaking to you of a young woman, says: "Good family, well bred, pretty, and three hundred thousand inher own right." You have expressed a desire to meet this charming creature.Usually, chance interviews are premeditated. And you speak with this object, who has now become very timid.YOU.—"A delightful evening!"SHE.—"Oh! yes, sir."You are allowed to become the suitor of this young person. THE MOTHER-IN-LAW (to the intended groom).—"You can't imagine how susceptible the dear girl is of attachment." Meanwhile there is a delicate pecuniary question to be discussed by the two families. YOUR FATHER (to the mother-in-law).—"My property is valued at five hundred thousand francs, my dear madame!" YOUR FUTURE MOTHER-IN-LAW.—"And our house, my dear sir, is on ...
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The Project Gutenberg EBook of Petty Troubles of Married Life, Part First by Honore de Balzac This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.net
Title: Petty Troubles of Married Life, Part First Author: Honore de Balzac Release Date: June 28, 2005 [EBook #6033] Language: English
*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK MARRIED LIFE ***
Produced by Dagny; and John Bickers
PETTY TROUBLES OF MARRIED LIFE
PART FIRST
BY
HONOREDEBALZAC
HI WINCEFAREPO SNAM FERPMOISSri fd,enIARR.AGEO ENW LIHCE EVYRIS OWN IL FIND Himyl dafllb  ,ew, saoman"Gooys: a fo uoyw gnuoy easpn  io  tngki nirhg.t "oY uahhousand inher owrht h eerdnut ded,rere py,ttnd a, chally.Usuturercaeni gahmrsic tht ee mtoe iresd a desserpxe evs objectwith thi upsae k .nA doyitededate aremprivre sweecnatni ir."s, s! ye"Ohew dlaolra eoY usue the omec btouoy siht fo rotis now be, who ha yitim.docemv relidetfghU.YOA ""!gn.EHSe luinevgani tmi ws  eohptibuscehe dle tlrig raea fo si enhmacttea M" t.gnp reos.n  HT EMOTHER-IN-LAW (tht oni ednetg deomro").u Yon'caREHTAF RUOY  .selimifao twe thy p or"yMwa.)nil-her- mot the (top etnuceed aacilrehes  ihinw tlesues db b  eidcsstion toiary que-IERTHMO"W.LAN-RUOY  "! ERUTUF ar sy deis oir, uo rnA d,em ohsu  atvefiun heddrtrepsi ylav  deu, my dear madamet ohsuna drfnascthn twe ne ohe.Tj seegduaf oilim a smallotaries,dna b gio en ,a p  uwnra ds,owlln suoedih owt yblot.ner  corn a  tofrtcac no "A  edih otc rebmah.Tern heatwh. ? c uhcr,hb fero econductingthe brlivic ehrtsigam ans e'athe ttod eneci  t yotssravoy  conto tyou SE TUC T ENUIKDNTHowllg:inthe foe l kiel,sorbunet reseunfotty f peo dworc a emoc nhe ty,Wh. . . .  but exceedinglyuahgetsri--nal,wnsson--iw la doruofof dny ro ruoot; ew ns prit iorbudnt  Inkel ?r  otyetouofpra I.LLA FOp a ti sed the lth, call slevenesi mfoihashrwie r,me pan tsocwelttial e famheirle teguineb w moihhchtw yo" s?hi tise bluort tahW".seiliteyt !oY uumtsb  pettyfor you."Pihc c dlstsoret joe ngkiwh;  ay, s aalmiitemet-ny deribl excar!" ta ,dnatpab ehthao-tos-sbhuy ppuad ethg fforuoy wwel il wr,m hoht ewseeacllb  yf CAROLIt name ow ewmohw dna ,ENyp the tkemal ilse .w via ll efo lik is,lineCaroasu mek We. ! llsiht,si kil am eny petty trouble sfom rairdel file b ae,fog insso emos rh uoY.en fouave,nthsr moec ,s niei damrrwhbeo  tlykelie rom si eh tuB .tcoun visoung a yahspp re ,roduegtes ohe diriresfo leht  ehtaedit seek,lies muslb eafimtas neisof evah  rof dnug,inrmhaou ynd aidse galyrc  ,evl ote alyounher e nanign,reej a r,ye c ataap, ini  siehtrea l waher ahusband whoalywhT eia.rsih ain,captthe er, na ,ega sih ,dlr hofr locoe thd os-nnil-tr ,ht ephe, andaw, Adoleenit ,reht gne in, ho s jhegeud (Setor.e Pre th.eT)fecahpeoih sn soy nlic r aofdednal heirporp er may be his poisitnoi  nht eowx ni wwel illlcaODA EHPLhw ,vetadny efa  riwy uor ofghte dauonly
PETTY TROUBLES OF MARRIED LIFE
.ou niMssaC eesnei ily, hav his fam.II ehTlora;eniMi. Cssliro:Ine
Here, as in the Chamber of Deputies, we are compelled to call for a division of the house: 1.—As to your wife. Your wife is to inherit the property of a maternal uncle, a gouty old fellow whom she humors, nurses, caresses, and muffles up; to say nothing of her father's fortune. Caroline has always adored her uncle, —her uncle who trotted her on his knee, her uncle who—her uncle whom—her uncle, in short,—whose property is estimated at two hundred thousand. Further, your wife is well preserved, though her age has been the subject of mature reflection on the part of your son-in-law's grandparents and other ancestors. After many skirmishes between the mothers-in-law, they have at last confided to each other the little secrets peculiar to women of ripe years. "How is it with you, my dear madame?" "I, thank heaven, have passed the period; and you?" "I really hope I have, too!" says your wife. "You can marry Caroline," says Adolphe's mother to your future son-in-law; "Caroline will be the sole heiress of her mother, of her uncle, and her grandfather." 2.—As to yourself. You are also the heir of your maternal grandfather, a good old man whose possessions will surely fall to you, for he has grown imbecile, and is therefore incapable of making a will. You are an amiable man, but you have been very dissipated in your youth. Besides, you are fifty-nine years old, and your head is bald, resembling a bare knee in the middle of a gray wig. III.—A dowry of three hundred thousand. IV.—Caroline's only sister, a little dunce of twelve, a sickly child, who bids fair to fill an early grave. V.—Your own fortune, father-in-law (in certain kinds of society they saypapa father-in-law) yielding an income of twenty thousand, and which will soon be increased by an inheritance. VI.—Your wife's fortune, which will be increased by two inheritances —from her uncle and her grandfather. In all, thus:  Three inheritances and interest, 750,000  Your fortune, 250,000  Your wife's fortune, 250,000                                       __________ Total, 1,250,000 which surely cannot take wing! Such is the autopsy of all those brilliant marriages that conduct their processions of dancers and eaters, in white gloves, flowering at the button-hole, with bouquets of orange flowers, furbelows, veils, coaches and coach-drivers, from the magistrate's to the church, from the church to the banquet, from the banquet to the dance, from the dance to the nuptial chamber, to the music of the orchestra and the accompaniment of the immemorial pleasantries uttered by relics of dandies, for are there not, here and there in society, relics of dandies, as there are relics of English horses? To be sure, and such is the osteology of the most amorous intent. The majority of the relatives have had a word to say about this marriage. Those on the side of the bridegroom: "Adolphe has made a good thing of it." Those on the side of the bride: "Caroline has made a splendid match. Adolphe is an only son, and will have an income of sixty thousand,some day or other!" Some time afterwards, the happy judge, the happy engineer, the happy captain, the happy lawyer, the happy only son of a rich landed proprietor, in short Adolphe, comes to dine with you, accompanied by his family. Your daughter Caroline is exceedingly proud of the somewhat rounded form of her waist. All women display an innocent artfulness, the first time they find themselves facing motherhood. Like a soldier who makes a brilliant toilet for his first battle, they love to play the pale, the suffering; they rise in a certain manner, and walk with the prettiest affectation. While yet flowers, they bear a fruit; they enjoy their maternity by anticipation. All those little ways are exceedingly charming—the
 house of Orlean saw sboileg dotthe cre n.owro Fht momtatnemeht y; H Jul V wenrye sauodleszili y tuthoitrone oheidnoc sufo snoita aptrC.ni eadsys first aroline'hgua rett dnd eh bto nede art puehg met  ehtg vaer amothThe ame. ro elbuod yalp ntve ehe ts:itquvlewop esdnuiw ,oy bwe, hiig tngdli  s apseldndiother's last chiil ton lm reH.evl ir gleil watthvarec dailttuo sd ischilale, a pesakou ythe  matlno no ysi eeht annoyanconjugal  .hTsic dea s noires dvehau yos raey neetxis roFair.nt huria luxa dneehtowt htt " ayhwigla f aisegnirettoisserpxr thn fothere moal.wi--nafimhT e ton hhehwig!"ayyas oy ss rui-non-law's family. R"boeb dnot ehh  lliw ,strap eerld oll akeli, beer,nihdls'c m nefeebus, fuloscroaht ht th ylsepoicwhdih che d il exeeptcived shtne in thed fortufi eruw a  niwhtlivee def yory oa hcihwt detatigy etxianha tkeliW li ltib  eilekle, an abortion.imafa yltiawht s tlylio ? vee Thre tsecuuld n wo doscenoa s rr:i wchanbrr geunyo eht ot enorhtehing the eans dur efoO lrht eohsu dssBee  Dheheuc tnet fofnocmeni-lawn-inr so younaecnnyosia  .hT au,yor foe ony rof eno suoires  and youon toyounIs ohtr riwef . the swos  i tof si mmocsexeti ,needytr uoa sry he mll tprouore iht ni ,natsni suryo, cenierat pseatlb,em  yedra sir!REVELATIONSrf dt mof eh tcaattht  iinisntcoahc eurt reh tibhiext nos oe danw mouogna y ni,gpeakly seral.Genediheh s.sraehS rethyee wo tr  om rairdeah sebneill she racter trsfir he, ysjot m eht ni fo tsditendt init, ing lust rafhtuo ,iwcisoy etdatoe,nchS .og ei se otnties of pleasurefoh ref ritsp rauryolfsees be idoF .oy rtiw yojhenated wur rejuvtaatnidefi eah scae  bstmut ha w naidnI eht dellmen;f woer oSumms ehes,sn rus ehsah f a bllusaeroft il m Hk! cermolpxeoi nsif ersh, her color isip erup w dna knIn. tehior fer hcenoyts-ra , deyaffeshe the cts abybs otl tilt ean, buysyoungwomdewo yb  tuolloflkwaabs inck, gst ira dnacspre sroid embrse,a nu.sesserddaehtseginnncue thn  oes resolved to insA elaxdnirenh sa berhey exr plamcurteh tad rthgu andtfulpy.  hapehi ;es ilhg sedleubro tttpea ,  tey dnAa sisihtes. At l artificnrtarulao en ,ehon, bye sl, lyowtsacffo  ,ec sahquen eloiouselichtd  eiwpskotn smevemot aslee oshw ,suoicaviv oshc ,osnamitade ,e and wit, so arp ehecal fo cargov lsue lipp tedo  frusea dnilef fir theleasst pydal gnumohw ni fewir ouyoe th, everbo resruofflea lthd gelitod f irhgetY uoa er find yoned. You ehs semitemos ,t.ac tlettlis hahtren iec nas ehasonr ree no joke incklantsileel ,tc ehsd si,lluyourself deceive;db tun :oC ralo dtoy trevlibeisoy ,ti e kniht uyou ast eiveperct urt ehoY uht !rmha cofl ul fn,oitautis siht nir a ithes neeavetal  ,htnasgnipghe Tshn nhmad.oot doow oig mohlrse, and  and nur somhtre eebocemsrif s'e;seliw torsc eanov loft snoftyarf ormrde is  sheuallgradalerevitot sohs he sis vs itr heuonrye snow ti hw you off, she jf caohylalcn yemivesat gnetht, oc rof esuac uoy .Yorrrtet anstoneyra sforof uo re life b intimatid uvocsrofeoy eedceglin aerexn  is , itssibimpo oujelt fo agd e Yn.mawouieq rouneht ,er eerht ,word nor a momen tof rboesvrtaoi sn,h uce ars ittlumilpic desera".eugntor hed ol her hieplths , at sinlaremit b seer yitely received: coeiyt ,ewerp lotoirhe tins uengh elpoepdleh evat yo; bure cu we dfotsaeilgns imnrohap yt hgt eh tngouhr disliarroecl aesu tepfrre you mths, wheY.srettat ni meest-elfser ou yves veyodea nnebneady alreave ou hs"" Aerugal racbbage-head.""Howuoc h dlw ,ei ohces airty nlmaa s ne nfohcooes ,""Hese?uld  sho,etacudeh hcaet e,if wiskemar  ohat afteertain tperauter royrud  lenkeoohe tom wto h rehta dcae idyo: "Dsaidand  edAdamaraM  uehit lurYo""e?pholi ehs ,namow eltt ts.emirife, now tYour wif-rnil-waehm toeho tais tlaceke pomrrt -ooY,uwo .pehoe omcoa n  iitatlusn taht nothe population aagni"!oY uahevs so! ou yre ary t gnii otercn esa ooysyt  dasirne "Ahgly:ghinulau ruoy dna ,gnint fgeleol cstdeol eensws htre !hTike lighpreads lsla si o ruoefiwanctmot n  apeexad fo krY.ssenkrnevidiw woe ths omhtce-o-nalrei-ng eernif thye onnid ,re ehtcsidl earsheAf. r teeht irset  ooccnpiness public, sap her hesshwie niloraC nehw ;sp wee,sheughsr lahgetd uah rehWneseor. tsig t chtrussfo eeht erp rself tojects hehp,es buo  fdAlof  iu yon,cais" uoy na r yrgoterrt."It's as bad sab iegnr boeb d!"lfseura s ay st dneirfno uoy o Bou therd."leva !odeWllumhca  shW".y ,yisopnoitueogyo,  oou rldgutht  o,uy uoo ed of yobe ashamh ruoy ni sngier ythbo; ldhoseouiwefuo rdny uoa lse a fa in  arej uonryet  otIlaountry or make anartc egufnonois Iy.shn t,or s amutsiccr sosnaecone!ast uch In s og sdnac eht otorim tmesbhus ouoctors cut the dorsp;yb ylt ehd ttli lle oala f a ehvirrifnot mrre, ou aat yn th damraet-dehk niremes  iite op huoy,der nrut uoy
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