Gem or Dud!

Phil Dhedouville

Description

The name of the book is “Gem or Dud!” It’s a Dad like joke book, coffee table book, and interactive game. The main character is me. aka “The Funniest UNFUNNY Guy!” Gem is one of his cousins. She thinks that the Funniest UNFUNNY Guy is the funniest and his jokes are Awesome! Dud is a cousin as well, she thinks he’s very UNFUNNY and his Jokes are just not original or Funny. They fight over him and of course, he loves it. The Purpose of the Book is to be a means to an end, to generate eye rolling and non-stopped Laughing. In the Game whoever makes his Opponent Laugh the Most, wins the most Points and thereby wins the Game. A website will be added to work alongside the book and assist in making this one of the most entertaining, and unpredictable Fun games on the Planet! Enjoy!

Sujets

• Humor
• DUD
• GEM

Informations

• Publié par: Xlibris US
• Date de parution: 27 avril 2023
• Nombre de lectures: 0
• EAN13: 9781669869672
• Langue: English

Extrait

GEM or DUD!
Phil Dhedouville

Copyright © 2023 by Phil Dhedouville.
 
ISBN:
Softcover
978-1-6698-6968-9

eBook
978-1-6698-6967-2
 
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the copyright owner.
 
Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Getty Images are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.
Certain stock imagery © Getty Images.
 
 
 
 
 
 
Rev. date: 04/27/2023
 
 
 
 
 
Xlibris
844-714-8691
www.Xlibris.com
851677
Contents
KARMA! Your Host!
The Funniest UNFUNNY Guy!
Welcome My warrior!
Your First Free 100 To 150 Points
Meet the Cousins!
The Book Alone!




Greetings My Friends!
Welcome to the
Funniest UNFUNNY Joke Book/Game!
This Book is Full Of Generations Of Eye-Rolling
“DadLike” Jokes that have been Passed Down from
Generation to Generation In One Form or Another!
It’s a Sad Planet Out there! We have Got to Learn how to Laugh Again and Stop Taking Things so Seriously! Life is Short! Enjoy It!
Smile and Laugh Often And Always!
KARMA! Your Host!
Greetings My Most Awesome Friend To An
extraordinary Journey Of Non Stopped Laughing!
My name is Karma and I will be Your Host as
you go through 100’s of Of Eye Rolling, shaking
Your Head while Laughing Dad-like Jokes that
You May or May not have heard of.
This is a Movement to make the Planet laugh!
It’s a sad Planet out there!
Enjoy, Smile and Laugh Often My Friend
Remember that With God All things are
Possible!
Yours truly in the Game! Karma!

The Funniest UNFUNNY Guy!
Hi my Friend, My name is Phil I am the Funniest Unfunny Guy! Out Of all the UNFUNNY people on the Planet I am the Funniest! At one of my darkest points in my Life While In Federal Prison, I looked Up to God and Asked him to help me find my Purpose and Direction. The next day I woke Up with an unshakeable thought that is as strong today as it was back then, I heard, “Make the Planet Laugh!” Let me tell you a quick story, one day I was walking down a street when I saw two ladies walk by a Homeless Person and say: “It’s a shame, someone should help him” As they both walked away.

The ladies Presented were hypocrites. They said one thing and did something else. I look around the world at all the sadness and think to myself how sad the world is. People need to relax, smile and Laugh more Often! If I did nothing to change that then I would also be a hypocrite and no better than those two ladies. And thus the Journey, adventure and mission to make the planet Laugh Begun and continues to this day through You….
The Battle is a Foot…. Or Maybe an Arm who knows…
Yours Truly In The Game!


Phil! Aka The Funniest UNFUNNY Guy!
Welcome My warrior!
The Manual in front of you contains some very funny but Mostly Unfunny, Eye Rolling, and Head shaking Jokes that have been passed down from one generation to another through Dads around the World! It doesn’t end there, Vol won will be followed up by Vol 2… and on, all sent in By You the readers.
What makes this Book different then all the other Dad Joke Books Passed down from Generation to Generation You ask? It’s Interactive! With non stop Off the hook fun!
Everytime you Play you will encounter a Different Adventure!
Smile and Laugh Often My Friend and Warrior!
Your First Free 100 To 150 Points
Show Homage to the Grand Poohba and Father of Comedy! Goto Phils Youtube Channel and Subscribe to it
It’s Fast and Free to Sub.
Youtube Channel: “The Funniest Unfunny Guy”
As long as You remain a Loyal Subbie then You will Start every Game with 100 Points!
If you Comment on his channel at the beginning of each Game “Smile and Laugh Often” or “with God All Is Possible!” You will begin the game with an additional 50 Points

Meet the Cousins!
Hello My friends! It’s me. You Can Call me By my Nickname “GEM.” I am a Cousin of the great Unfunny Guy! I think he is the Funniest Guy on the Planet. If You Pick me as Your Cousin for the Game then You need to Support Your Grand Poohba and Father of comedy. Watch out for Your Evil Cousin “DUD!”

 
Hey my warrior! It’s I Your Cousin,
My Nickname is “Dud!” I am not a
Fan of the Funniest UNFUNNY Guy!
Or His pathetic Cousin “Gem!”
His Jokes are not only NOT Funny but
are not Original! If You are Picking
Me For the Game, then you should
prepare Yourself for battle against
Your Cousin GEM!

The Book Alone!
The book itself will be entertaining as it sits on a Coffee table or is brought on long drives to entertain the kids or even a Party favor at a party!
1. Each Joke is worth 10 points!
2. Whoever is Up Tells the Joke!
3. If Your Opponent Laughs then You win and you Get the 10 Points!
4.If your opponent doesn’t Laugh then you Lose and he/she gets the 10 Points!
5.At the end of the game whoever has the most points wins!!
6. That’s it!

{Mark off Your Favorite Jokes You Believe You Can Make Others Laugh at when You tell them!}
1. Why don’t you feed Teddy Bears? Because they are Stuffed!
2. Cheers to Johnny Beans! “It’s All Good!” +10 Points
3. Explain Why Dogs can’t operate MRI machines but catscan!
4. Explain why you bought your dog a Suit to wear on his walks. It’s to help him do his Business!
5. No matter how well you treat your dog, they will always say they have it ruff!
6. Where do you take a dog that loses his tail? To Walmart, or some other retail store!
7. I asked my friend when was his birthday? He said March 1 st , so I did and then asked him again!
8. You got a new puppy for YOUR son, It seemed like a good deal!
9. Start a Play slap fight with someone, if they Laugh you win! If they don’t, Run!
10. Some people Pick their nose, I was born with mine
11. What’s a dog’s favorite topping on a pizza? Pupperoni!
12. I lost sight of my dalmatian Puppy! Luckily he was spotted!
13. Can a dog jump higher than a building? Of course, buildings can’t jump!
14. Why don’t dogs eat Pancakes? Because they only like Woofles!
15. People who cook breakfast in a t-shirt are not right! Most people use a Pan!
16. Your dating site application has been rejected due to Answer #5 “what do you want to see in a man?” A bullet is not an acceptable answer!
17. How many apples grow on a tree? All of them!
18. How does Moses make his coffee? Hebrews it!
19. What’s the best time to go to the dentist? Tooth irty on tooth day!
20. The tallest building on the planet is the library because it has a lot of stories!
21. I love telling Dad jokes! Sometimes he even Laughs!
22. What do you call a fish with two Knees? A two-kneefish!
23. The wedding was so beautiful that even the cake had tiers!
24. There were these two birds that got fired at the zoo! They were two-canned birds!
25. What Travels across the world but stays in the same corner? A stamp!
26. Does your family say a prayer before you eat? No, we are French, we know how to cook!
27. It’s my wife’s birthday tomorrow. She’s been leaving jewelry catalogs all over the house, so I’ve bought her a magazine rack.
28. Who is the Penguins’ favorite aunt? AuntArtica!
29. I asked a Frenchman if he played video games. He said Wii
30. What do you call a bunny that is not smart? A hare Brain!
31. Why was the bunny so Upset? He was having a bad hare Day!
32. Why did the broom decide to go to bed? Because he was very sweep y!
33. Which football player has the biggest helmet? The one with the biggest head!
34. What happens to football players who become blind? They become referees
35. What football play should you be suspicious of? The quarterback sneak!
36. Why did the football coach go to the bank? To get his quarterback!
37. What do football players wear on halloween? Face Masks!
38. What kind of tea do football players drink? Penal tea!
39. Why didn’t the dog want to play football? It was a Boxer!
40. Why was Cinderella such a poor Football Player? Because her coach was a Pumpkin!
41. There was this Big X on the floor where the next person in line was supposed to stand and wait, but I am too smart for that, I have seen all the Road Runner Cartoons.
42. Why did the football quit the team? It was tired of being kicked around!
43. I read a book on how to Fall down the stairs! It was a Step by Step Guide!
44. My wife asked me if she could have some peace and quiet while she cooked dinner. So I took the batteries out of the smoke alarms.
45. The Egyptians say there are no crocodiles in their country. But I think that they are in De nile.
46. How is a football referee like an Angry Chicken? They both have Foul mouths!
47. Since this storm started my husband hasn’t stopped looking through the window! I guess if it gets any worse, I will have to let him in.
48. Two cats were walking next to each other, one cat was Leading, the other was the copycat!
49. I got a new job at the Guillotine Factory. I’ll beheading there soon.
50. I told the car salesman that I didn’t want to buy this car. He said “But it runs well!” I