Confessions of a Control Freak

Morrison Priscilla Knox

Description

There's nothing wrong with wanting the perfect house, perfect family, perfect finances, perfect life...until the desire for perfection takes over. For every woman who can't let go of control--and for those who live and work with them--comes Confessions of a Control Freak, by debut author Priscilla Knox Morrison. Through her patient teaching, readers will learn to...let go of the need to be in chargeaccept their limitationstrust God with the futureaccept help from othersvalue people over reputationFull of practical advice, humorous personal illustrations, and faith-based research, this book will help women overcome their need to be in charge, trust God to handle changing circumstances, and enjoy the people around them.

Informations

• Publié par: Harvest House Publishers, Inc.
• Date de parution: 01 août 2012
• Nombre de lectures: 0
• EAN13: 9780736946216
• Langue: English

Extrait

The desire to be in control is deeply imbedded in the human nature. The evidence can be seen in tyrant world leaders, crafty politicians, sly business people, and even the church secretary. But for a person to be a true representative of Christ, our human urge to control must be surrendered. Confessions of a Control Freak is a guide to move from needing to control the world around you to joyfully surrendering control to the God of the universe. If you are serious about your testimony for the Lord, make this book a part of your growing experience. Not only will it enhance your testimony, but also your joy and freedom in living for Christ.
- Simon Schrock President, Choice Books of Northern Virginia
It is difficult to live with a control freak. It is even more difficult to be one. In her honest, poignant, and often humorous confessions, Priscilla Morrison leads the way to true inner peace that offers hope for recovering control freak and a blessing to those who are called to love them.
- Bob Allums Director of A Praying Life Ministries and seeJesus Ministries
Confessions of a Control Freak is a delightful read full of practical advice from a woman who knows her subject well. The personal illustrations are humorous and fun to read, and the faith-based advice Priscilla gives is very practical. This is a great book for every control freak who has come to the realization that control is just an illusion, and who wants to learn how to trust God and enjoy people.
- Beth Moorhead Counseling Ministries, Wayzata Free Church
Priscilla Morrison has written a wonderfully honest, insightful, and practical book on the epidemic of trying (with good intent) to obsessively control our lives and the lives of those around us. She confronts the personal, social, and spiritual dynamics of wanting to be the creator rather than the created. Confessions of a Control Freak is a valuable resource for identifying some of our unhealthy compulsions and then living life with greater freedom and delight.
- Robert A. Fryling Author of The Leadership Ellipse: Shaping How We Lead by Who We Are
Priscilla Morrison writes honestly about the destructive pattern of control in her relationship to her husband and children. She writes compellingly of how God used His Word, prayer, family, and friends to uncover and ultimately bring sanity and healing in her life. It is a truly helpful guide for those who see this same pattern and want guidance on how to change.
- Rose Marie Miller Author of From Fear to Freedom
HARVEST HOUSE PUBLISHERS
EUGENE, OREGON
Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture quotations are from the New King James Version. Copyright 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved.
Verses marked NIV are taken from The Holy Bible, New International Version NIV . Copyright 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.
Verses marked ESV are from The Holy Bible, English Standard Version, copyright 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a division of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved.
Cover by Dugan Design Group, Bloomington, Minnesota
Cover photos iStockphoto /3355m; Kreber / Corbis Super RF / Alamy
Back cover author photo by Adriana Margriet Grant
All the incidents described in this book are true. Where individuals may be identifiable, they have granted the author and the publisher the right to use their names, stories, and/or facts of their lives in all manners, including composite or altered representations. In all other cases, names, circumstances, descriptions, and details have been changed to render individuals unidentifiable.
CONFESSIONS OF A CONTROL FREAK Copyright 2010 by Priscilla Knox Morrison Published by Harvest House Publishers Eugene, Oregon 97402 www.harvesthousepublishers.com
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Morrison, Priscilla Knox
Confessions of a control freak / Priscilla Knox Morrison
p. cm
ISBN 978-0-7369-4620-9 (pbk.)
ISBN 978-0-7369-4621-6 (eBook)
1. Control (Psychology)-Religious aspects-Christianity. 2. Christian women-
Religious life. I. Title.
BV4597.53.C62M67 2012
248.8 43-dc23
2012007751
All rights reserved . No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means-electronic, mechanical, digital, photocopy, recording, or any other-except for brief quotations in printed reviews, without the prior permission of the publisher.
To Arenda, a girl who by a split-second s event lost all control of her life-her movements, her thinking, her ability to communicate, her relationships, her dreams - and whose subsequent gentle and contented spirit daily taught me much about control.
And to Larry, Jesse, Leah, Elizabeth, Susanna, Clay, and Abby - my incredible family, who not only encouraged me to write this book, but endured life s classroom along with me as I learned to let go and be more at peace.
CONTENTS
Preface
Introduction
Control Freak Questionnaire
Part 1: Confessions
Confession 1 I care too much about what people think of me.
Confession 2 I don t always trust God with the future, so I do all I can to make things turn out okay.
Confession 3 I haven t (really) forgiven people of their past faults, so I try to protect myself from being hurt again.
Confession 4 I want things my way!
Confession 5 I love to help people I just don t always stop at what s helpful.
Confession 6 I don t think I need help from others.
Confession 7 No matter how hard I try, I can t control anything!
Confession 8 My words reveal what I truly believe.
Confession 9 I let others control my emotions.
Confession 10 I haven t always repented of these confessions.
Part 2: Moving Forward
Chapter 11 The Common Denominator
Chapter 12 Aging
Chapter 13 Survival Guide: Coping with the Control Freak in Your Life
Conclusion
About the Author / About the Publisher
PREFACE
M y name is Priscilla, and I m a recovering control freak.
Since the time I first began to face this personality trait of mine, I ve actually made significant progress. It has been an interesting trek, sometimes painful-for me and for those I love-but nonetheless, a positive journey. The encouragement it has brought me has led me to write this book.
However, writing this book was particularly challenging because a control freak s work is never done. I haven t learned it all, haven t read all the other books. I m still a work in progress.
My ultimate goal is to glorify God as I write. After all, it is He who has made the changes in me. My second goal is to help others-perhaps you, perhaps someone you love. A control freak s life is often unhappy, stressful, dissatisfied, and certainly not peaceful. I hope and pray something you read here will meet you there. There is hope-lots of it.
I know it s often tedious to read an author s thanks to those who helped them in their writing, but now I know why writers take the time to do it. I must thank those friends and family members who didn t snicker when I told them I was thinking of writing a book, and who dutifully answered my questions, teaching me and helping my thoughts to gel. I also thank my husband and walking concordance, Larry, for his trust and assurance that I could do this, and all our children-Jesse, Leah, Elizabeth, Susanna, Clay, and Abby-for allowing me to expose our lives. Special thanks to Leah and Abby for their countless hours of editing and for bringing me back to the drawing board with constructive criticism and encouragement. And to Clay, who helped me express the joy I ve found in becoming a child of God. I thank my sister JoAnn, who patiently taught me that the computer can be my friend. Deepest gratitude goes to Simon Schrock and Bob Allums, who gave of their time and wisdom to graciously encourage this novice. And to God, who gave me all these people and gave me Himself. How can it be?
INTRODUCTION
So What Are We Talking About Here?
W e all know a control freak when we see one. It s the person hardly anyone can stand to work with because it s her way or the highway. The mother whose children have to file their socks. The father who gets obedience from his family but scares the living daylights out of them. The guy who can t relax because things around him aren t perfect. Or the woman next to me on a plane recently who not only demonstrated how to put my tray down, but told me where to put my cup. These people can be the bane of our existence, or worse, we might realize that we re control freaks too.
Am I a control freak?
Perhaps you re honestly asking yourself, How do I know if I m a control freak? Here are some recognizable signs:
nagging others
trying to orchestrate outcomes
butting into others affairs
worrying about things beyond your control
feeling anxiety about the future
never feeling peaceful
needing everything to be in perfect order
It takes some harsh evaluating to recognize some of these habits in yourself. If you re a detail person, it s tricky to wear the planning hat and not put on the micromanaging hat at the same time. Before admitting to this aspect of my nature, I was a very frustrated person. I grew up in a big family, and I was the neatnik. I loved to clean and organize and had plenty to work with since our house was always Grand Central Station. If I was a control freak when I was younger, though, I certainly wasn t aware of it! Then I got married and had children. If you re single and think you might be a bit of a control freak, just get married and have some kids. Your tendencies will blossom into a garden of full-blown habits.
My husband, Larry, and I have six children. I wanted all six. I love all six. But it was in parenting that my control freak dilemma surfaced. I still marvel at how many details come into play for eight people to get through one day-you have to plan for rising times, cooking, dishes, carpoo