Making Ordinary Moments Extraordinary

Becca Gunyon MCC

Description

As parents, we want to get it right! We can choose to make ordinary moments EXTRAordinary by the culture we cultivate, the way we communicate, the thoughts we think about one another, the adventures we create together…

Working through the Parenting Moment by Moment themes will provide you with your own blueprint to build thriving relationships with your kids and teens.

Theme 1: Cultivate the Culture in Your Home

Theme 2: Create Thriving Relationships

Theme 3: Communication

Theme 4: Continual Affirmation

Theme 5: Construct Boundaries, Guidelines, and Guardrails

Theme 6: Choose to be Fully Present

Sujets

• Religion
• Christianisme
• Vie de famille
• Parentalité et Éducation des Enfants
• Christian Living
• Mentoring
• Philosophie et théologie
• Leadership

Informations

• Publié par: WestBow Press
• Date de parution: 20 décembre 2022
• Nombre de lectures: 0
• EAN13: 9781664285804
• Langue: English

Extrait

Making Ordinary Moments EXTRAordinary
 
Parenting Moment by Moment
 
 
 
BECCA GUNYON, MCC
 
 

 
Copyright © 2023 Becca Gunyon, MCC.
 
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the author except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.
 
WestBow Press
A Division of Thomas Nelson & Zondervan
1663 Liberty Drive
Bloomington, IN 47403
www.westbowpress.com
844-714-3454
 
Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.
 
Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Getty Images are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.
Certain stock imagery © Getty Images.
 
Scripture quotations marked AMP are taken from the Amplified® Bible, Copyright © 1954, 1958, 1962, 1964, 1965, 1987 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission.
 
Scripture quotations marked AMPC are taken from the Amplified Bible, Classic Edition, Copyright © 1954, 1958, 1962, 1964, 1965, 1987 by The Lockman Foundation
 
Scripture quotations marked MSG or The Message are taken from The Message. Copyright 1993, 1994, 1995, 1996, 2000, 2001, 2002. Used by permission of NavPress Publishing Group.
 
Scripture quotations marked NASB are taken from the New American Standard Bible®, Copyright © 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission.
 
Scripture quotations marked NIV are taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV®.
Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by Biblica, Inc.™
Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved worldwide.
 
Scripture quotations marked NLT are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2007 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.
 
ISBN: 978-1-6642-8581-1 (sc)
ISBN: 978-1-6642-8580-4 (e)
 
WestBow Press rev. date: 12/16/2022
 
 
 
Thankful to all the students I have counseled; each of them taught me what they long for in their relationship with their par ents.
Thankful to my husband, Dan, who encourages me to write every day.
Thankful for my children, Owin, Addi, Eben, JohnE, and A nden.
Thankful for each member of my family, Gunyon, Owings, and Tuiaso sopo.
Thankful to Westbow Publishing for being so wonderful to work with.
Thankful to Lexie Fish for edi ting.
Thank you, Lord’s Way Ministries and The Way Counseling (established 2000).
CONTENTS
Introduction
Theme 1: Cultivate the Culture
Theme 2: Create Thriving Relationships
Theme 3: Communicate
Theme 4: Continual Affirmation
Theme 5: Construct Boundaries, Guidelines, and Guardrails
Theme 6: Choose to be Fully Present
Final Reflection
Additional Parenting Articles
The Best Version of Me
What Has He Called me to do Today?
Building Our Home
The Plan Is Good
Creating a Routine of Thankfulness
The Gift of Adversity
I Loved Being Here
Would I Want to be Parented by Me?
Season of Launching
Entrusting
What Can I Do?
Conclusion
Author’s Note
References
INTRODUCTION
As parents, we want to get it right. We desire to cultivate thriving relationships with our children and teens. Much of our relationship with our kids is built in those seemingly ordinary moments. How we live our moments determines the health of our relationships. Creating an atmosphere in our home that allows our kids and teens to grow into adults who give life to the world around them is so rewarding. We can instill honor, kindness, faith, respect, service, and love in our children’s lives. These qualities, when lived out in their adult lives, will enrich our own lives in the future. How we choose to live our moments with our kids can build a strong bond that will stand the test of time. We are parenting for today and for tomorrow! One of the best gifts we can give our kids is an enjoyable relationship with us; this helps them grow into adults who give life to the world around them. We can make ordinary moments EXTRAordinary!
Twenty plus years of counseling adolescents created a close-up view of students’ hearts, thoughts, disappointments, hopes, and how they perceive life. A group of students gave me an amazing gift of getting to sit across from them. Each student’s perception of life has a direct correla tion with their feelings about their life at home and their relationship with each parent. The thought process of adolescents is intriguing. For the last twenty years, each time a teenager mentions their parent, I mentally take note. They are teaching me how to communicate with my own kids and teens. Early on in my counseling career, my biggest win was getting a student and their parents to communicate in love.
Two years after I started counseling, my oldest son was born. Having my own child made me realize at an entirely different level that most—almost all—parents want to get it right!
I started thinking about the teens coming to my office and how I could learn from them. How could I help them in their relationship with their parents? What could I glean about parenting from hearing their frustration, needs, heartache, the root of their struggles?
Every student I had the honor of sitting across from taught me something. These ideas in Parenting Moment by Moment are treasures I was given by listening to teens’ thoughts, beliefs, and hearts. Extraordinary relationships are built in ordinary moments. These six themes can help you create a blueprint for growing strong relationships with your children.
Each section is designed to be tailored to your own home and family situation. May these six themes enrich your relationship with your children, teens, and adult children.
Dedicated to my par ents,
Jim and Danise Ow ings,
who love wholeheart edly
“Through skillful and godly Wisdom is a house (a life, a home, a family) built, and by understanding it is established [on a sound and good founda tion],
And by knowledge shall its chambers [of every area] be filled with all precious and pleasant riches.” (Proverbs 24: 3 -4 AMPC)
THEME 1: Cultivate the Culture
Culture is created by what’s important to us. Whether we realize it or not, our home has a culture. As parents, we are given the gift, and responsibility, to cultivate the culture of our home.
The culture we grow up in generally feels normal to us. Oftentimes, we repeat our “normal.” Depending on the culture of our household growing up, we can build on an amazing foundation, or we can repeat negative patterns.
Take a few moments to reflect:
What is the current culture of our home?
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
What was the culture of my childhood home?
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
What was the tone used in family conversation (loud, quiet, closed off, passive, kind)?
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
How did I feel in my home?
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Do I want to create for my family the same culture I grew up in? Why or Why not?
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Am I repeating the “normal” I grew up in? Is this how I want to parent?
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Because culture is created by what’s important to us, as parents, we have to decide what qualities we want to cultivate in our children. We can ask ourselves, “What do we want our family to be known for?” After taking an honest look at our current culture, we may want to make changes.
When our oldest three kids were all under the age of six, a lifetime mentor asked me and my husband, Dan, a great question. She said, “What do you want your home to look like now, and what do you want it to look like ten years from now? At first this question felt overwhelming. After thinking about it a while longer, we realized she was empowering us now, while our kids were still young, to shape both the current and future culture of our home.
Questions like that can feel scary, yet self-evaluation is powerful and life-giving. Take a moment and ask yourself the same questions: What do I want to cultivate in our household? What do I want the culture of my home to be?
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Creating and growing a culture takes time, just like planting. Over the years I’ve bought many plants. I always get so excited bringing these bright pops of greenery into my home. I place it in a nice sunny spot, I water it, and then, despite my best intentions, life happens. I get busy or distracted. I forget to water it. It gets scorched by the sun. That happy little plant starts to wither. But, if I reset my intentions, if I move it to a better spot in the shade, if I water it and give it a little more attention, it begins to bloom. I also have a few fake plants in my home, they just sit there, adding greenery. They never grow or change, they lack roots.
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