My Mother's Sons

Patrick Krayer

Description

My Mother’s Sons provides a thoughtful model for how Western Christian workers can respectfully negotiate sexual boundaries and norms in Muslim contexts. Westerners are inclined to impose their own culturally shaped notions of gender equality and justice on non-egalitarian communities, alienating the very people they are seeking to serve. The author draws on his own research among Pakistani Pashtuns, intercultural theory, and exegesis of Christian and Islamic sacred texts to show that it is possible to work for transformational change without offending those who live within a patriarchal system.

Sujets

• Religion
• Christianisme
• Missions
• Christian Ministry
• Philosophie et théologie

Informations

• Publié par: William Carey Publishing
• Date de parution: 09 septembre 2013
• Nombre de lectures: 0
• EAN13: 9781645081128
• Langue: English
• Poids de l'ouvrage: 1 Mo

Extrait

My Mother s Sons: Managing Sexuality in Islamic and Christian Communities
Copyright 2013 by Patrick Krayer
All Rights Reserved.
No part of this work may be reproduced, stored in retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means-electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise-without prior written permission of the publisher, except in brief quotes used in connection with reviews in magazines or newspapers.
Unless otherwise indicated, Scripture quotations are from the Revised Standard Version of the Bible, copyright 1946, 1952, and 1971 the Division of Christian Education of the National Council of the Churches of Christ in the United States of America. Used by permission. All rights reserved.
Scripture quotations marked ESV are from The Holy Bible, English Standard Version (ESV ), copyright 2001 by Crossway, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved.
Published by William Carey Library
1605 E. Elizabeth Street
Pasadena, CA 91104 | www.missionbooks.org
Aidan Lewis, editor
Brad Koenig, copyeditor
Rose Lee-Norman, index
Alyssa E. Force, design
Cover photo: iStockphoto LP
William Carey Library is a ministry of the
U.S. Center for World Mission
Pasadena, CA | www.uscwm.org
Digital Ebook Release BP 2013
ISBN: 978-0-87808-852-2

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Krayer, Patrick.
My mother s sons : managing sexuality in Islamic and Christian communities / Patrick Krayer.
pages cm
Includes bibliographical references.
ISBN 978-0-87808-625-2
1. Sex-Religious aspects-Christianity. 2. Sex-Religious aspects-Islam.
I. Title.
BT708.K735 2013
306.7088 297-dc23
2013004856
To all who cross ethnic, cultural, and religious boundaries in order to be faithful representatives of Christ.
TABLE OF CONTENTS

Introduction
Purpose and Structure
The Need for Emotional Distance
Conclusion
Part I
Sexuality and Its Management in an Islamic Community
1 Purdah: A Means of Understanding and Managing Sexuality
Purdah Means Curtain
Purdah: Separating the World into Public and Domestic Space
Purdah: Separating People into Insiders and Outsiders
Purdah: Shaped by Hay
Purdah: Assumptions about Females
Purdah: Boundaries in Domestic Space
The Boundaries of Walls and Betak
The Boundary of Sound
Purdah: Boundaries in Public Space
The Boundary of Cloth
The Boundary of Companion
The Boundary of Special Space
Purdah: Boundaries in Academic Space
Purdah: Boundaries in the Workplace
Purdah: Crossing Boundaries
Conclusion
2 Purdah and Marriage
The Arrangement-Engagement
Criteria for Selection
Contact between Engagement and Marriage
Male Dominance in the Marriage
Roles and the Division of Labor
The Impact of Living as an Extended Family
Constructing a Marriage Relationship
Conclusion
3 The Sacred Foundations of Purdah
The Beginning of Hijab
The Meccan Influence
Protection from Harassment
Protection from Temptation
Gender and Power
Rights, Differences, and Inequality
Gender and Nature
Conclusion
Part II
Sexuality and Its Management in Christian Communities
4 The Greco-Roman Approach to Sexuality and Its Management
Stratification in Society
Stratification in the Family
Stratification and Assumptions about Sexuality
Stratification in Marriage Due to Age
Stratification Due to Concordia and Partnership
Stratification Modified
Marriage sine Manu
The Extended Family
Female Fidelity
Stratification in Space and Cloth
Conclusion
5 Creating the World of Sexuality: Genesis 1:1-2:4
Sexuality and Image
Sexuality, Hierarchy, and Ontology
Hierarchy, Task, and Context
Hierarchy and the Seventh-day Rest
Conclusion
6 Envisioning Sexuality and Its Management: Genesis 2:4-25
Hierarchy, Partnership, and Incompleteness
Hierarchy, Ontology, and Aloneness
Hierarchy, Action, and Image
Conclusion
7 Explaining the Current Malaise: Genesis 2:25-3:24
The Curse of the Serpent
From Mutual Regard to Task Management
Conclusion
A Summary of the Genesis Narrative
8 Recreating Oneness in 1 Corinthians 7:1-16
Asceticism or Celibacy?
Sexuality and Oneness
Conclusion
9 Affirming the Other in 1 Corinthians 11:2-16
A Relational Paradigm from Creation and Redemption
The Assumption of Subordination
Kephale and Primogeniture
The Assumption of Ontology
The Symbolism of Head Coverings
A Symbol of Superiority
A Symbol of Sexuality and Marriage
Conclusion
10 Restoring Order in 1 Corinthians 14:33-35
The Context of 14:33-35
The Need for Enculturation
The Nature of the Interaction
Submission and the Law
An Appeal to Shame
Conclusion
11 Transforming Relationships in Ephesians 5:22-33
The Context of 5:22-33
Creating a New Foundation for Marriage
Creating a New Image of Hierarchy
Contradicting the Assumption of the Impaired Nature
Conclusion
12 Restoring Harmony in 1 Timothy 2:9-15
Paul s Focus: Wealthy Women
Paul s Method of Correction: Creative Rhetoric
Paul s Cultural Solution: Constructive Work
Conclusion
Part III
The Pashtuns and Paul: Sexuality, Culture, and Transformational Involvement
13 Commonality and Coherence
The Twenty-first-century Pashtun Urban Context
Purdah: Assumptions and Values
Purdah: The Forms
Purdah and the Conjugal Relationship
Purdah: Education and Employment
The First-century Greco-Roman Urban Context
The Pauline Response
Paul s Locus Classicus on Gender: The Creation Narrative
God as Creator
In God s Image
Image: The Commission and the Seventh Day
Image: Man and Woman as Helper
Paul and Monogamy
Paul and Conjugal Hierarchy
Paul and Ontology
Paul and Power
Paul and Symbols
Paul and Shame
Commonality
Coherence
The Pauline Model as an Interpretive Paradigm
Distancing Paul from Western Theologies
Paul and the Pashtun Boundaries
Paul and the Pashtun Conjugal Relationship
Conclusion
14 Conceptualizing Transformational Involvement
Involvement and Intentionality
Prophetic Dialogue
Involvement as Incarnation
Conceptualizing Change within Pashtunistan
The Crisis of Trust
Dialectic Tension
The Direction of Change
The Construction of Trust
Conclusion
Appendix A: Cultural and Social Systems
Appendix B: Gender Parallelism in Luke and Acts
References
Index
INTRODUCTION

Daughters of Jerusalem!
I am dark, but I am beautiful,
like the tents of Kedar,
like the curtains of Solomon.
So don t stare at me because my skin is dark;
it s because the sun has stared at me.
My mother s sons were angry with me,
they made me tend the vineyards;
but my own vineyard I tended not.
S ONG OF S ONGS 1:5,6 1
THE FEMALE LOVER in this song distances herself from her brothers by referring to them as her mother s sons. Why? They did not treat her like brothers should. They mistreated her. Due to their anger, they put a workload on her that caused her to neglect herself. So she suffered at their hands. No reason is given for their anger. The poem is constructed so that we side with the lover, assuming that her brothers anger was unjustified.
If we back up from the text and think about the cultural context, these verses were written in a time and place where beauty was in part probably determined by the lightness of one s skin. (I have lived in several contemporary cultures that determine beauty this way.) Thus the female lover had become ugly due to her heavy workload in the vineyards and her overexposure to the sun. Though her circumstances negatively impacted her appearance, they clearly did not diminish her self-esteem. Her positive self-image refreshingly bursts forth in the first couplet (v. 5). Her beauty did not depend on the color of her skin.
These verses were written in a patriarchal setting, where males generally held the dominant position in family and society. The society had given the brothers the ability to control their sister s movements and determine her responsibilities. From the lover s vantage point, her brothers abused their position. Since we are inclined to side with the lover as we read, the text is subversive, subtly rebuking the misuse of male position and power.
Our own cultural assumptions and values impact the way we read Scripture and how we view other social systems. Those of us in Western cultures who have grown to value egalitarian social systems have developed a proclivity to devalue patriarchal social systems. Due to this, we are inclined to interpret the lover s rebuke as a diatribe against patriarchy. However, her subtle rebuke does not malign the patriarchal system. It only rebukes the misuse of power within that system.
This distinction is important, especially for those of us who live and work interculturally. Some of us are inclined to malign male-preferring, hierarchical social systems wherever we encounter them. We blur the distinction between hierarchical social systems and the abuse that occurs within these systems. It doesn t occur to us that many people live and work in such systems and support them. Contemporary Western readings of Scripture sacralize our perspective and strengthen our resolve to change these systems and make them egalitarian.
I have seen insiders resent attempts by Western outsiders who advocated for an egalitarian social model. These insiders felt that change was being imposed upon them, especially in an area that is so volatile as sexuality and its management. These attempts by outsiders for egalitarian change made the insiders feel like their society s moral foundations were under attack. Globalization and the consequent rapid social changes that have been taking place all over the world exacerbate the insiders feelings.
I have interacted with many intercultural workers who were blind to these fears and tensions of insiders. The workers were appalled by the traditional ways the host society managed