Can We Agree to Disagree?: Exploring the differences at work between Americans and the French

Agathe Laurent, Sabine Landolt

Description

At first, there's this impression that we're alike, that being French or American is kind of the same. We celebrate the same heroes, sing the same tunes, and prefer the same cool looks.
But once we start working together, sharing the same office space, and using the same coffee machine, we notice that our ways of working diverge, and that we do not understand each other as much as we thought we did. Soon enough, we become suspicious, embarrassed, judgmental... Working together becomes challenging. All of a sudden, we realize that the ocean that separates us is real!

Sabine Landolt and Agathe Laurent, co-authors of this book, have been through this deep realization themselves.
- Sabine, Swiss-American, has had significant experience living in Italy and in France, arrived with her family in New York in 2008.
- Agathe, spent her early childhood in the US and later had an international professional career, was onboarded to her new job in New York in 2014.
Without a question, both experienced challenging work-related moments, due to cultural misunderstanding and radically different approaches to work. The simplest task became mountainous obstacles to overcome. All basics became such as obstacles.

Deeply inspired by their own journey, they decided to create this very unique book: a compelling collection of stories from French and American professionals about their experiences working together. This book reveals the risks of misjudgments, miscommunications and related emotions. It provides tips to accelerate mutual understanding, with a clear and simple ambition: To help let go of stereotypes, spark curiosity, and encourage professionals to combine the best of both cultures, for happier, easier and more successful professional collaborations.

What makes this book so different?
This book introduces a whole new concept with very unique learnings , with an approach that's a bit provocative as well as evocative! This book shows the severe risk of mutual misjudgment. The authors don't try to reinvent the wheel here nor to dig into the 'why's'. Through doubts, observations, interrogations, experiences, the reader grasps the profundity  of the gap, and the deep emotions -i.e. the symptoms- in those moments.

This book is about real stories, which we hope will make the readers smile and relate to, whomever they are and wherever they live--in France or in the U.S. It is not about trying to be scientific, nor relying on the Theory-we know there are nuances of all types, based on the regions, the industry, and roles within an organization. And of course, there's a person's unique  history . This book speaks about what matters most to people, and where the issues are the most numerous and unexpected.  The authors are not trying to be comprehensive-the topics come directly from the 50 interviews-split evenly between Americans and French people, conducted in a semi-directed mode, following the methods of Freud and Piaget, working with associations and spontaneous probes. This book provides tips and tricks on how to get there. Where, you may ask? Again, happier, more effective work collaboration. The work is not about taking sides, defending one perspective versus the other, nor about criticizing one group -on the contrary, our profound goal  is to provide a blueprint for a successful collaboration between Americans and the French. We know that both possess unique assets that can create an extraordinary alchemy. Our common history and alliances have demonstrated the fruitfulness of the friendship between these two great Nations!

Preface
About this book
TOPICS
Work... what for?
The thinkers and the doers
Socializing at work
The art of written messages
Meetings
Positive spirit versus critical mindset
Professional Relationships
Team - One for all and all for one?
The meanings behind the words
Did you say expertise?
Work styles and social codes of conduct
Give feedback - But how?
The do's and don'ts - The taboos
Conclusion
Appendix
About the authors
Artworks credits
Contributors and thank you
Why they like the book
About TBR Books
About CALEC

Sujets

• Social Science
• Sociologie, société et politique
• management

Informations

• Publié par: CALEC
• Date de parution: 01 août 2020
• Nombre de lectures: 0
• EAN13: 9781947626515
• Langue: English

Extrait

Exploring the differ ences at work be tween
Americans and the Fr ench: A perspec tive on
the cultural gap , and tips for successf ul and
happ y collabora tions .
Agathe Laur ent & Sabine Landolt
TBR Books
New Y ork
C AN WE A GREE
T O DIS A GREE?
Copyright ©2020 b y Agathe Laur ent et Sabine Landolt
All rights reserv ed. No part of this publication may be repr oduced,
distributed, or tr ansmitted in any f orm or by an y means, without prior
written permission.
TBR Books is a pr ogram of the Center f or the Advancement of Languag es,
Education, and Communities . W e publish resear chers and prac titioners
who seek to engage diver se communities on topics rela ted to education,
languages, cultural history , and social initiatives.
TBR Books / CALE C
750 Le xington Av enue, 9 th Floor
New Y ork, NY 10022
www . tbr-book s. org | contact@tbr -books . org
Fr ont Cover Illustra tion © Bayr ol Jimenez
ISBN 978- 1 -947626-48-5 (paperback)
ISBN 978- 1 -947626-49- 2 (hardco ver)
ISBN 978- 1 -947626-51 -5 (eBook)
ISBN 978- 1 -947626-55-3 (paperback Premium)
ISBN 978- 1 -947626-56-0 (hardcover Pr emium)
Library of Congr ess Control Number: 2020938726
“T o our American and Fr ench friends who
have helped us become who w e are , and have
shaped how we think, making us curious about
other s and more open t o differences . ”
“T o our parents , who taught us since our very
firs t day that e very person, of any age , gender ,
color , social level , and nationality , is worth it . ”

CONTENT
Pref ace
About this book
T OPICS
Work... Wha t for?
The thinker s and the doers
Socializing at work
The art of written messages
Meetings
Positiv e spirit versus critical mindse t
Pr ofessional R elationships
T eam – One for all and all f or one ?
The meanings behind the wor ds
Did you sa y expertise ?
Work s tyles and social codes of conduct
Give feedbac k – But how?
The do ’ s and don ’ts – The taboos
Conclusion
Appendix
About the authors
Artworks credits
Contributor s and thank you
Why the y like the book
About TBR Book s
About CALE C
10
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25
31
39
45
51
59
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106
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120
Who has never said or thought, "I do not under stand what (s)he means; (s)
he seems to under stand nothing, the message has been lost!” These mo -
ments of discourag ement are f ollowed b y a judgment — often nega tive:
"They ar e all like this or that; they ar e stupid; they are cr azy!”
All these reac tions are very human and natur al because , regar ding cul -
tural differ ences (or e ven any kind of diff erence) , we all have the tenden -
cy t o take r efuge in wha t reassures us the most: Our own point of view
and our experience on how t o work and live .
This book is born from 50 int erviews of F rench and American individuals
working with the other cultur e; all are true cases . Y ou will read in these
pages the experiences o f people who , like you, live Fr anco-American r e -
lations with its frus trations, misunderstandings, and successes.
I interview ed Sabine and Agathe to ask them how the y had experienced
this book -writing and their collabora tion. Sabine is Swiss and American,
and she has also lived in Italy and in F rance . Agathe is F rench and has
been living in the U. S. f or many y ears, including in her early c hildhood.
She has alwa ys work ed internationall y . They bring tog ether all the com -
plexity o f their individual and collective multicultur al work.
Both Sabine and Agathe also had chall enging work -rela ted experiences
while living abr oad. They tol d me that they ha ve "cried in the toile ts" and
felt alone multiple times during their pr ofessional lif e, overwhelmed by
their misunderstandings with their t eams . What was their secret t o suc -
ceeding, and what recipe did the y use to work t ogether with respec t for
their individual differences ? Bo th cite an ability t o step back and "s tart
from a blank pag e" when a relationship begins t o become tense due to
mutual misunderstandings . Their curiosity and a genuine desire t o learn
constitute the w ealth of motivation and positive ener gy needed to sup -
port taking a step back: An energy-consuming activity .
Indeed, t o judge , t o put the other in a box, or to use ster eotypes, are very
human solutions that we spend less ener gy on because it is so much eas -
ier and immediate!
But this also has the risk of locking us int o our golden cage , going ar ound
in cir cles with the same ideas and confirming beliefs that ma y not be
complet ely true . And, most importantly , it prevents us fr om enjoying the
PREF A CE
11
country we live in, enriching ourselv es, and doing enough to creat e a
unique combination of our cultur e of origin and the one of the host coun -
tries .
Sabine and Agathe also cite the ability t o be surprised and to hav e a fresh
look at the other , and not taking oneself t oo seriously , as essential qual -
ities to survive the dr eaded but often una voidable cultur al occurrence of
being "lost in tr anslation. "
They sa y that what allo wed them to mov e forwar d in the inevitable situa -
tions of grea t inter cultural loneliness was t o realiz e that , thanks t o their
differences , they possessed a r eal added value . "This book has been a
kind of cathartic therap y! I finally put on paper the ‘why’ of all my ef -
forts… It's good!" The collabora tion of Sabine and Agathe , who coul d not
be more differ ent from eac h other , to write this book is the living pr oof
that it is possible t o over come the differences t o creat e, innova te , be sur -
prised and have f un!
I am sure that this ric h content will awak en a cultural r eflecting pool
where y ou will identify with positive and negative emo tions. I invite y ou to
read this book with openness . Its goal is to make y ou want to under stand
the other in or der to impr ove y our relationships a t work and in your per -
sonal life . Like Sabine and Agathe , stay connect ed to y our own humanity ,
with all its imperfections, and look at eac h other with humility and curi -
osity , two ke y qualities to succeed in any cultur e.
Have a good r eading!
Anna
Anna Gallotti is a Global Executive coach who w orks with top-level decision
makers around the globe .

13
ABOUT THIS BOOK
This book is not trying to r einvent the wheel nor digging int o the “whys ”: W e
know there is a l ot out there on this t opic. What makes this book different is
that, through real e xperiences, we can grasp the int ensity of the pertinent
emotions and measure the r eactions .
This book shows the pr of ound risk of mutual misjudgment.
This book is not trying to be scientific or theor etical —we know ther e are nu
-
ances among people , across r egions, and through indus tries. A F rench per son
coming to the U .S . as an expat f or a few y ears will not appr oach w orking with
Americans in the same way as a F rench entr epreneur woul d. And it is the same
for Americans mo ving to Fr ance . Moreov er , there ar e also deep regional dif
-
ferences: Working in NY is not the same as working in Dallas or Memphis, and
Fr ance being very centraliz ed, working in Paris or in a pr ovince outside is dif
-
ferent t oo .
This book is about real st ories, which we hope will make y ou smile and relat e
to , whomever you ar e and wherev er you live .
This book is not trying to be compr ehensive—the topics tha t we have gather ed
come directl y from the 50 int erviews—25 Americans and 25 F rench, conducted
in a semi-direct ed mode , following the me thods of Fr eud and Piaget, working
with associations and spontaneous pr obes.
This book speaks about what matt ers most t o people we int erviewed, and
where the issues ar e the most numerous .
This book is not about defending one per spective , nor about bashing—on the
contrary . Our prof ound motivation is t o provide a blueprint f or a successf ul
collaboration be tween Americans and the Fr ench. W e know that bo th possess
unique assets that can cr eate an e xtraor dinary alchemy .
This book pro vides tips and tricks on how t o get ther e.

15
C AN WE A GREE
T O DIS A GREE?
In my company, we offer generous holiday packages. But that's not what
gets American colleagues excited. They are more interested in money than
in free time, especially since they have no social safety net. As a
result, it is difficult to recruit. We hire other nationalities.
Dans ma boît e , on offr e des
pack ages de vacances impor -
tants — mais ce n ’ est pas ce
qui les f ait triper . Ce qui les
int ér esse , c ’ est l ’ arg ent et
pas f or cément le t emps libr e .
L ogique , pour eux, c ’ est sans
file t social! Du coup on a du
mal à r ecr ut er . Al ors on pr end
d’ a utres na tionalit és .
— CLÉMENT , Fre nc h
Spirits Industry , New Y ork, U .S.
WORK … WHA T F OR?
17