Life is a Four-Letter Word

Andy Salkeld

Description

 Key Features

·     
Addresses the little talked-about, highly stigmatised
and often taboo subject of mental health as a professional and as a man in a
brutally honest and moving critique

·     
Based on the real-life experiences of a ‘Big 4’
accountant and his personal experiences in professional practice, large
corporates and start-ups

·     
Full of controversial and thought-provoking
questions that help any reader consider what really matters to them in life
when facing tough decisions

FOREWORD 

A NOTE FROM CHRIS ETHERINGTON 

A NOTE FROM JONATHAN EDGELEY 

PREFACE 

ACKNOWLEDGEMENT 

ONE: My Own Worst Enemy

Understanding Mental Health 

Our Inner Voices, Critics and Conversations 

Introductions 

TWO: Spoon Theory and Thermodynamics 

Spoon Theory 

The Conservation of Energy 

One Fine Day 

The Hero of Time

One Mind, One Body, One Cup

THREE: High School Never Ends

Standing Out from the In Crowd 

Cultures and Cliques: Bullying, Belittling and Banter 

Your Comfy Pants 

FOUR: Promotion, Premonition and Making a Plan

White Collars Can’t Jump 

Long-Term Incentives

Promotion Time!

FIVE: Thinking Big Picture in a Detail-Orientated World

The World Is Not Your Oyster 

Regretting Regretting 

Do Not Blame Past You 

SIX: Risk, Reward, Redundancy and Repetition 

Closed Doors, Opened Windows and Hurricane Glass 

Data-Driven Decisions 

Scooby-Doo 

Rabbit Holes and Through the Looking Glass 

SEVEN: Breaking the Stigma Whilst Carrying Stigmata 

The Hell that Is My Life 

The Science of Selling Yourself Short 

In the End 

The Weight of Shame 

EIGHT: Fuck It and Go Find Your Ikigai 

That Moment 

We’re Half-Way There 

Three Quarter Pounder 

The Full Package 

NINE: Learning to Love Lemons Because You’re Sick of Lemonade

Disney Lied to Us! 

Life Is Shit but You Don’t Have to Be 

IF YOU WANT TO TALK TO ME 

IF YOU WANT TO TALK TO SOMEONE 

Sujets

• Santé et bien-être
• Bien-être émotionnel
• Bien-être émotionnel
• Business
• Stress
• Anxiety
• Psychology
• Self-help
• Self-help (disambiguation)
• Estrés
• Sociologie, société et politique
• Mental Health
• Workplace Culture

Informations

• Publié par: Practical Inspiration Publishing
• Date de parution: 14 mai 2020
• Nombre de lectures: 0
• EAN13: 9781788601573
• Langue: English
• Poids de l'ouvrage: 1 Mo

Extrait

First published in Great Britain by Practical Inspiration Publishing, 2020
© Andy Salkeld, 2020
The moral rights of the author have been asserted.
ISBN 978-1-78860-155-9 (print)
978-1-78860-157-3 (epub)
978-1-78860-156-6 (mobi)
All rights reserved. This book, or any portion thereof, may not be reproduced without the express written permission of the author.
Every effort has been made to trace copyright holders and to obtain their permission for the use of copyright material. The publisher apologizes for any errors or omissions and would be grateful if notified of any corrections that should be incorporated in future reprints or editions of this book.
CONTENTS

FOREWORD
A NOTE FROM CHRIS ETHERINGTON
A NOTE FROM JONATHAN EDGELEY
PREFACE
ACKNOWLEDGEMENT
ONE: My Own Worst Enemy
Understanding Mental Health
Our Inner Voices, Critics and Conversations
Introductions
TWO: Spoon Theory and Thermodynamics
Spoon Theory
The Conservation of Energy
One Fine Day
The Hero of Time
One Mind, One Body, One Cup
THREE: High School Never Ends
Standing Out from the In Crowd
Cultures and Cliques: Bullying, Belittling and Banter
Your Comfy Pants
FOUR: Promotion, Premonition and Making a Plan
White Collars Can’t Jump
Long-Term Incentives
Promotion Time!
FIVE: Thinking Big Picture in a Detail-Orientated World
The World Is Not Your Oyster
Regretting Regretting
Do Not Blame Past You
SIX: Risk, Reward, Redundancy and Repetition
Closed Doors, Opened Windows and Hurricane Glass
Data-Driven Decisions
Scooby-Doo
Rabbit Holes and Through the Looking Glass
SEVEN: Breaking the Stigma Whilst Carrying Stigmata
The Hell that Is My Life
The Science of Selling Yourself Short
In the End
The Weight of Shame
EIGHT: Fuck It and Go Find Your Ikigai
That Moment
We’re Half-Way There
Three Quarter Pounder
The Full Package
NINE: Learning to Love Lemons Because You’re Sick of Lemonade
Disney Lied to Us!
Life Is Shit but You Don’t Have to Be
IF YOU WANT TO TALK TO ME
IF YOU WANT TO TALK TO SOMEONE
FOREWORD

David Chan, Inclusion and Diversity Partner at Squire Patton Boggs
Is life a four-letter word? This is perhaps debatable (an inevitable question coming from a pedantic lawyer).
It is definitely a six-letter word – finite. This is obvious to a lawyer working to six minute chargeable chunks of life… there is only so much time in a day.
Lawyers live increasingly busy lives in uncertain and challenging times. There is a constant and inexorable demand for us to be more knowledgeable, more speedy, more efficient and much more. We are also often portrayed as exhibiting unparalleled attention to detail, having expansive knowledge of every law in the country and in possession of Vulcan-like emotional armour.
Over recent years, there has been a growing concern across the legal industry about lawyer wellbeing and mental health. The issue is complex and is shaped by the individuality of each of our lives and other factors, such as disability, age, class, race, gender and sexuality.
A common thread, however, is a perceived stigma associated with admitting that one is suffering from mental health challenges. This book serves as an open and incisive view into the mind of a young professional, how life can unravel and how it can be turned round.
Each person’s life is what they make of it. Life is not always easy, but it is easy in the pursuit of ‘more’ to be deflected from life itself. We sometimes forget about the real reasons for our existence until a significant jolt, which is often a four-letter word, forces us to reassess life.
I do hope that this book will empower its reader to reflect and refocus on the important things in life (and decide how many letters it comprises)…
A NOTE FROM CHRIS ETHERINGTON

Partner at RSM
When you are next sat at your desk at work, take a moment.
Look around.
If you work in an office environment, it’s easy to think you know the people you work with. You probably spend most of your waking hours with your colleagues.
For some, you’ll be spending more time with your teammates this week than with your family.
Do you truly know them?
Sure, you talk to each other all day. You may enjoy working with them and have a pretty good flavour of their personalities. There might even be a few you count as true friends.
I thought I knew Andy. The reality is I barely knew him at all.
We were in different departments at work and on different floors but every so often, the pair of us were thrown into the maelstrom of stress that is getting a transaction completed for a client.
Did I have a clue that Andy was struggling? Not a scooby.
I knew a version of him: Andy with the acceptable mask that he put on for work. I was wearing one too.
This book tears that mask away. It is a brutally honest account of what a career in a large accountancy firm can be like and the potential toll it can take on your mental health. A mental health survival guide for anyone starting out their careers in an accountancy firm.
As someone who has been through the ranks and has been fortunate enough to make it through to Partner, there is a lot in this book that rings true to me. The imposter syndrome is definitely still going strong (I’ll get found out one day).
Thankfully, things are starting to change and there is a lot of good work being done by firms to promote mental health awareness now.
There’s a long way to go but stories like this one help to break down the stigma associated with mental health that prevents us from being open and honest about our struggles in the workplace.
Not everyone’s experience will be the same but I’m grateful that Andy’s shared his. Hopefully one day we can all take off our masks.
A NOTE FROM JONATHAN EDGELEY

Corporate Partnership Director at MYNDS
During January 2007, my father led an intervention into my life.
I wasn’t aware of anything that was going on around me. All I know is that I woke up in a rehabilitation centre in South Africa.
I didn’t realise it at the time but this was to be the start of a new dawn.
Today, over a decade later, I am in recovery from alcohol and substance addiction.
I have a wonderful wife and four amazing children. My purpose in life has changed from seeking highs and feeding an addiction that was controlling me, to helping others who suffer with adverse mental health and addiction to access the appropriate help and support.
There are many phenomenal campaigns aimed at reducing the stigma of mental health and getting people to talk. The reality of it all is that the people openly talking about their mental health are not the ones who are struggling with it daily. Those talking have already found acceptance in themselves.
There is still a lot of work to be done to help others to accept themselves.
People are still dying from overdoses. Pain-killer addiction is increasing significantly. Suicide rates are at a sixteen-year high.
Mental health needs to be viewed in the same way as physical health.
We need more people talking about their own experiences of mental health illness, sharing them without concern of judgement, ridicule or fear for their career.
I have heard Andy speak of his story and the work he is doing first-hand. He speaks with absolute authenticity in a highly thought provoking and poignant way. His only agenda in any of his work – whether this book, his talks or anything else he does in life – is to carry the simple message of hope to those who are still suffering in silence.
It is a pleasure to be a part of Andy’s journey and to help break the stigma around adverse mental health.
May these words and this book help encourage more people to talk openly.
PREFACE

I never thought I’d write a book.
If I’m honest, I never thought that I’d be alive and here today.
I always believed I would end my life at one point or another. It was always going to be: achieve something; feel the accomplishment that goes with it; then end things.
Every time I reached the place where I would write that full stop in my life, a wild semicolon appeared, and I just kept on going.
For many that semicolon doesn’t appear to save them.
What gets left behind after a suicide is unimaginable. There are constant questions that can never be answered and an event that can never truly be understood. An unexplained hole is left in the heart of those around; one that can never heal.
There is no closure.
I don’t want to end my life and leave anyone with that hole in theirs. I am going to keep fighting and keep doing what I can to show that living with depression is not only possible, but also worthwhile. People can overcome all forms of adversity, and suffering adverse mental health is no different.
This book will cover a lot of personal experiences that some may find hard to read or understand. I know that even mentioning some of these experiences to my family and friends is painful for them, so do not be scared if you feel uncomfortable or get upset.
I say what I do to be honest; to show what it’s really like.
I don’t want to be a hero.
I certainly don’t want to be a martyr.
All I want is for those out there struggling to know that there is hope. There are ways through the darkest of times. There are ways you can recover and move beyond them.
Most importantly though, for anyone out there struggling, know that you are not alone.
The world can be overwhelming, but you don’t have to face it by yourself.
No one does.
Andy Salkeld
just another guy
ACKNOWLEDGEMENT

There were many people who were there for me when I was in my darkest place. There are far too many to name and I wouldn’t be able to do any of them the justice they truly deserve.
This acknowledgement isn’t for them.
This book is for my absolute best friend ever, whom I love to bits and who means the complete fucking world to me. Like everyone, we’ve had our ups and d