The Complete Novels of H. G. Wells (Over 50 Works: The Time Machine, The Island of Doctor Moreau, The Invisible Man, The War of the Worlds, The History of Mr. Polly, The War in the Air and many more!)


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Herbert George "H. G." Wells (1866 – 1946) was an English writer.
He was prolific in many genres, including the novel, history, politics, social commentary, and textbooks and rules for war games. Wells is now best remembered for his science fiction novels and is called a "father of science fiction", along with Jules Verne and Hugo Gernsback. His most notable science fiction works include The Time Machine (1895), The Island of Doctor Moreau (1896), The Invisible Man (1897), and The War of the Worlds (1898). He was nominated for the Nobel Prize in
Literature four times.
Here you will find all his novels in the chronological order of their original publication.
- The Time Machine
- The Wonderful Visit
- The Island of Doctor Moreau
- The Wheels of Chance
- The Invisible Man
- The War of the Worlds
- Love and Mr Lewisham
- The First Men in the Moon
- The Sea Lady
- The Food of the Gods and How It Came to Earth
- Kipps
- A Modern Utopia
- In the Days of the Comet
- The War in the Air
- Tono-Bungay
- Ann Veronica
- The History of Mr. Polly
- The Sleeper Awakes
- The New Machiavelli
- Marriage
- The Passionate Friends
- The Wife of Sir Isaac Harman
- The World Set Free
- Bealby: A Holiday
- Boon
- The Research Magnificent
- Mr. Britling Sees It Through
- The Soul of a Bishop
- Joan and Peter: The Story of an Education
- The Undying Fire
- The Secret Places of the Heart
- Men Like Gods
- The Dream
- Christina Alberta's Father
- The World of William Clissold
- Meanwhile
- Mr. Blettsworthy on Rampole Island
- The Autocracy of Mr. Parham
- The Bulpington of Blup
- The Shape of Things to Come
- The Croquet Player
- Brynhild
- Star Begotten
- The Camford Visitation
- Apropos of Dolores
- The Brothers
- The Holy Terror
- Babes in the Darkling Wood
- You Can't Be Too Careful


SF et fantasy
Victor Hugo
Jack London
Le Livre de la jungle
Mark Twain
David Copperfield
Jane Eyre
Moby Dick
Tom Sawyer
L'Île du docteur Moreau (film, 1996)
Invisible Man
Bleak House
Sherlock Holmes
Time machine
Jane Austen
Oliver Twist
Wuthering Heights
Love and Mr Lewisham
Crime and Punishment
Christmas carol
The Three Musketeers
Ann Veronica
Brontë family
The Island of Doctor Moreau
The Complete Works
The War in the Air
The First Men in the Moon
A Tale of Two Cities
The Sleeper Awakes
The Shape of Things to Come
The History of Mr Polly
The Food of the Gods
Russia in the Shadows
A Modern Utopia
The War of the Worlds
Tales of Space and Time
A Short History of the World
In the Days of the Comet
León Tolstói
War of the worlds


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Date de parution 01 novembre 2017
Nombre de lectures 14
EAN13 9789897780486
Langue English

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H. G. Wells

The Time Machine
First published: 1895

Chapter 1

The Time Traveller (for so it will be convenient to speak of him) was expounding a
recondite matter to us. His grey eyes shone and twinkled, and his usually pale face was
flushed and animated. The fire burned brightly, and the soft radiance of the incandescent
lights in the lilies of silver caught the bubbles that flashed and passed in our glasses. Our
chairs, being his patents, embraced and caressed us rather than submitted to be sat upon,
and there was that luxurious after-dinner atmosphere when thought roams gracefully free of
the trammels of precision. And he put it to us in this way — marking the points with a lean
forefinger — as we sat and lazily admired his earnestness over this new paradox (as we
thought it:) and his fecundity.
‘You must follow me carefully. I shall have to controvert one or two ideas that are almost
universally accepted. The geometry, for instance, they taught you at school is founded on a
‘Is not that rather a large thing to expect us to begin upon?’ said Filby, an argumentative
person with red hair.
‘I do not mean to ask you to accept anything without reasonable ground for it. You will
soon admit as much as I need from you. You know of course that a mathematical line, a line
of thickness nil, has no real existence. They taught you that? Neither has a mathematical
plane. These things are mere abstractions.’
‘That is all right,’ said the Psychologist.
‘Nor, having only length, breadth, and thickness, can a cube have a real existence.’
‘There I object,’ said Filby. ‘Of course a solid body may exist. All real things —’
‘So most people think. But wait a moment. Can an instantaneous cube exist?’
‘Don’t follow you,’ said Filby.
‘Can a cube that does not last for any time at all, have a real existence?’
Filby became pensive. ‘Clearly,’ the Time Traveller proceeded, ‘any real body must have
extension in four directions: it must have Length, Breadth, Thickness, and — Duration. But
through a natural infirmity of the flesh, which I will explain to you in a moment, we incline to
overlook this fact. There are really four dimensions, three which we call the three planes of
Space, and a fourth, Time. There is, however, a tendency to draw an unreal distinction
between the former three dimensions and the latter, because it happens that our
consciousness moves intermittently in one direction along the latter from the beginning to the
end of our lives.’
‘That,’ said a very young man, making spasmodic efforts to relight his cigar over the
lamp; ‘that... very clear indeed.’
‘Now, it is very remarkable that this is so extensively overlooked,’ continued the Time
Traveller, with a slight accession of cheerfulness. ‘Really this is what is meant by the Fourth
Dimension, though some people who talk about the Fourth Dimension do not know they mean
it. It is only another way of looking at Time. There is no difference between Time and any of
the three dimensions of Space except that our consciousness moves along it. But some
foolish people have got hold of the wrong side of that idea. You have all heard what they have
to say about this Fourth Dimension?’
‘I have not,’ said the Provincial Mayor.
‘It is simply this. That Space, as our mathematicians have it, is spoken of as having three
dimensions, which one may call Length, Breadth, and Thickness, and is always definable by
reference to three planes, each at right angles to the others. But some philosophical people
have been asking why three dimensions particularly — why not another direction at rightangles to the other three? — and have even tried to construct a Four-Dimension geometry.
Professor Simon Newcomb was expounding this to the New York Mathematical Society only a
month or so ago. You know how on a flat surface, which has only two dimensions, we can
represent a figure of a three-dimensional solid, and similarly they think that by models of thee
dimensions they could represent one of four — if they could master the perspective of the
thing. See?’
‘I think so,’ murmured the Provincial Mayor; and, knitting his brows, he lapsed into an
introspective state, his lips moving as one who repeats mystic words. ‘Yes, I think I see it
now,’ he said after some time, brightening in a quite transitory manner.
‘Well, I do not mind telling you I have been at work upon this geometry of Four
Dimensions for some time. Some of my results are curious. For instance, here is a portrait of
a man at eight years old, another at fifteen, another at seventeen, another at twenty-three,
and so on. All these are evidently sections, as it were, Three-Dimensional representations of
his Four-Dimensioned being, which is a fixed and unalterable thing.
‘Scientific people,’ proceeded the Time Traveller, after the pause required for the proper
assimilation of this, ‘know very well that Time is only a kind of Space. Here is a popular
scientific diagram, a weather record. This line I trace with my finger shows the movement of
the barometer. Yesterday it was so high, yesterday night it fell, then this morning it rose again,
and so gently upward to here. Surely the mercury did not trace this line in any of the
dimensions of Space generally recognized? But certainly it traced such a line, and that line,
therefore, we must conclude was along the Time-Dimension.’
‘But,’ said the Medical Man, staring hard at a coal in the fire, ‘if Time is really only a
fourth dimension of Space, why is it, and why has it always been, regarded as something
different? And why cannot we move in Time as we move about in the other dimensions of
The Time Traveller smiled. ‘Are you sure we can move freely in Space? Right and left we
can go, backward and forward freely enough, and men always have done so. I admit we move
freely in two dimensions. But how about up and down? Gravitation limits us there.’
‘Not exactly,’ said the Medical Man. ‘There are balloons.’
‘But before the balloons, save for spasmodic jumping and the inequalities of the surface,
man had no freedom of vertical movement.’ ‘Still they could move a little up and down,’ said
the Medical Man.
‘Easier, far easier down than up.’
‘And you cannot move at all in Time, you cannot get away from the present moment.’
‘My dear sir, that is just where you are wrong. That is just where the whole world has
gone wrong. We are always getting away from the present movement. Our mental existences,
which are immaterial and have no dimensions, are passing along the Time-Dimension with a
uniform velocity from the cradle to the grave. Just as we should travel down if we began our
existence fifty miles above the earth’s surface.’
‘But the great difficulty is this,’ interrupted the Psychologist. ‘You can move about in all
directions of Space, but you cannot move about in Time.’
‘That is the germ of my great discovery. But you are wrong to say that we cannot move
about in Time. For instance, if I am recalling an incident very vividly I go back to the instant of
its occurrence: I become absent-minded, as you say. I jump back for a moment. Of course
we have no means of staying back for any length of Time, any more than a savage or an
animal has of staying six feet above the ground. But a civilized man is better off than the
savage in this respect. He can go up against gravitation in a balloon, and why should he not
hope that ultimately he may be able to stop or accelerate his drift along the Time-Dimension,
or even turn about and travel the other way?’
‘Oh, this,’ began Filby, ‘is all —’
‘Why not?’ said the Time Traveller.‘It’s against reason,’ said Filby.
‘What reason?’ said the Time Traveller.
‘You can show black is white by argument,’ said Filby, ‘but you will never convince me.’
‘Possibly not,’ said the Time Traveller. ‘But now you begin to see the object of my
investigations into the geometry of Four Dimensions. Long ago I had a vague inkling of a
machine —’
‘To travel through Time!’ exclaimed the Very Young Man.
‘That shall travel indifferently in any direction of Space and Time, as the driver
Filby contented himself with laughter.
‘But I have experimental verification,’ said the Time Traveller.
‘It would be remarkably convenient for the historian,’ the Psychologist suggested. ‘One
might travel back and verify the accepted account of the Battle of Hastings, for instance!’
‘Don’t you think you would attract attention?’ said the Medical Man. ‘Our ancestors had
no great tolerance for anachronisms.’
‘One might get one’s Greek from the very lips of Homer and Plato,’ the Very Young Man
‘In which case they would certainly plough you for the Little-go. The German scholars
have improved Greek so much.’
‘Then there is the future,’ said the Very Young Man. ‘Just think! One might invest all
one’s money, leave it to accumulate at interest, and hurry on ahead!’
‘To discover a society,’ said I, ‘erected on a strictly communistic basis.’
‘Of all the wild extravagant theories!’ began the Psychologist.
‘Yes, so it seemed to me, and so I never talked of it until —’
‘Experimental verification!’ cried I. ‘You are going to verify that?’
‘The experiment!’ cried Filby, who was getting brain-weary.
‘Let’s see your experiment anyhow,’ said the Psychologist, ‘though it’s all humbug, you
The Time Traveller smiled round at us. Then, still smiling faintly, and with his hands deep
in his trousers pockets, he walked slowly out of the room, and we heard his slippers shuffling
down the long passage to his laboratory.
The Psychologist looked at us. ‘I wonder what he’s got?’
‘Some sleight-of-hand trick or other,’ said the Medical Man, and Filby tried to tell us about
a conjurer he had seen at Burslem; but before he had finished his preface the Time Traveller
came back, and Filby’s anecdote collapsed.
The thing the Time Traveller held in his hand was a glittering metallic framework, scarcely
larger than a small clock, and very delicately made. There was ivory in it, and some
transparent crystalline substance. And now I must be explicit, for this that follows — unless his
explanation is to be accepted — is an absolutely unaccountable thing. He took one of the
small octagonal tables that were scattered about the room, and set it in front of the fire, with
two legs on the hearthrug. On this table he placed the mechanism. Then he drew up a chair,
and sat down. The only other object on the table was a small shaded lamp, the bright light of
which fell upon the model. There were also perhaps a dozen candles about, two in brass
candlesticks upon the mantel and several in sconces, so that the room was brilliantly
illuminated. I sat in a low arm-chair nearest the fire, and I drew this forward so as to be almost
between the Time Traveller and the fireplace. Filby sat behind him, looking over his shoulder.
The Medical Man and the Provincial Mayor watched him in profile from the right, the
Psychologist from the left. The Very Young Man stood behind the Psychologist. We were all
on the alert. It appears incredible to me that any kind of trick, however subtly conceived and
however adroitly done, could have been played upon us under these conditions.
The Time Traveller looked at us, and then at the mechanism. ‘Well?’ said thePsychologist.
‘This little affair,’ said the Time Traveller, resting his elbows upon the table and pressing
his hands together above the apparatus, ‘is only a model. It is my plan for a machine to travel
through time. You will notice that it looks singularly askew, and that there is an odd twinkling
appearance about this bar, as though it was in some way unreal.’ He pointed to the part with
his finger. ‘Also, here is one little white lever, and here is another.’
The Medical Man got up out of his chair and peered into the thing. ‘It’s beautifully made,’
he said.
‘It took two years to make,’ retorted the Time Traveller. Then, when we had all imitated
the action of the Medical Man, he said: ‘Now I want you clearly to understand that this lever,
being pressed over, sends the machine gliding into the future, and this other reverses the
motion. This saddle represents the seat of a time traveller. Presently I am going to press the
lever, and off the machine will go. It will vanish, pass into future Time, and disappear. Have a
good look at the thing. Look at the table too, and satisfy yourselves there is no trickery. I don’t
want to waste this model, and then be told I’m a quack.’
There was a minute’s pause perhaps. The Psychologist seemed about to speak to me,
but changed his mind. Then the Time Traveller put forth his finger towards the lever. ‘No,’ he
said suddenly. ‘Lend me your hand.’ And turning to the Psychologist, he took that individual’s
hand in his own and told him to put out his forefinger. So that it was the Psychologist himself
who sent forth the model Time Machine on its interminable voyage. We all saw the lever turn.
I am absolutely certain there was no trickery. There was a breath of wind, and the lamp flame
jumped. One of the candles on the mantel was blown out, and the little machine suddenly
swung round, became indistinct, was seen as a ghost for a second perhaps, as an eddy of
faintly glittering brass and ivory; and it was gone — vanished! Save for the lamp the table was
Everyone was silent for a minute. Then Filby said he was damned.
The Psychologist recovered from his stupor, and suddenly looked under the table. At that
the Time Traveller laughed cheerfully. ‘Well?’ he said, with a reminiscence of the Psychologist.
Then, getting up, he went to the tobacco jar on the mantel, and with his back to us began to
fill his pipe.
We stared at each other. ‘Look here,’ said the Medical Man, ‘are you in earnest about
this? Do you seriously believe that that machine has travelled into time?’
‘Certainly,’ said the Time Traveller, stooping to light a spill at the fire. Then he turned,
lighting his pipe, to look at the Psychologist’s face. (The Psychologist, to show that he was not
unhinged, helped himself to a cigar and tried to light it uncut.) ‘What is more, I have a big
machine nearly finished in there’— he indicated the laboratory — ‘and when that is put
together I mean to have a journey on my own account.’
‘You mean to say that that machine has travelled into the future?’ said Filby.
‘Into the future or the past — I don’t, for certain, know which.’
After an interval the Psychologist had an inspiration. ‘It must have gone into the past if it
has gone anywhere,’ he said.
‘Why?’ said the Time Traveller.
‘Because I presume that it has not moved in space, and if it travelled into the future it
would still be here all this time, since it must have travelled through this time.’
‘But,’ I said, ‘If it travelled into the past it would have been visible when we came first into
this room; and last Thursday when we were here; and the Thursday before that; and so forth!’
‘Serious objections,’ remarked the Provincial Mayor, with an air of impartiality, turning
towards the Time Traveller.
‘Not a bit,’ said the Time Traveller, and, to the Psychologist: ‘You think. You can explain
that. It’s presentation below the threshold, you know, diluted presentation.’
‘Of course,’ said the Psychologist, and reassured us. ‘That’s a simple point ofpsychology. I should have thought of it. It’s plain enough, and helps the paradox delightfully.
We cannot see it, nor can we appreciate this machine, any more than we can the spoke of a
wheel spinning, or a bullet flying through the air. If it is travelling through time fifty times or a
hundred times faster than we are, if it gets through a minute while we get through a second,
the impression it creates will of course be only one-fiftieth or one-hundredth of what it would
make if it were not travelling in time. That’s plain enough.’ He passed his hand through the
space in which the machine had been. ‘You see?’ he said, laughing.
We sat and stared at the vacant table for a minute or so. Then the Time Traveller asked
us what we thought of it all.
‘It sounds plausible enough to-night,’ said the Medical Man; ‘but wait until to-morrow.
Wait for the common sense of the morning.’
‘Would you like to see the Time Machine itself?’ asked the Time Traveller. And therewith,
taking the lamp in his hand, he led the way down the long, draughty corridor to his laboratory.
I remember vividly the flickering light, his queer, broad head in silhouette, the dance of the
shadows, how we all followed him, puzzled but incredulous, and how there in the laboratory
we beheld a larger edition of the little mechanism which we had seen vanish from before our
eyes. Parts were of nickel, parts of ivory, parts had certainly been filed or sawn out of rock
crystal. The thing was generally complete, but the twisted crystalline bars lay unfinished upon
the bench beside some sheets of drawings, and I took one up for a better look at it. Quartz it
seemed to be.
‘Look here,’ said the Medical Man, ‘are you perfectly serious? Or is this a trick — like that
ghost you showed us last Christmas?’
‘Upon that machine,’ said the Time Traveller, holding the lamp aloft, ‘I intend to explore
time. Is that plain? I was never more serious in my life.’
None of us quite knew how to take it.
I caught Filby’s eye over the shoulder of the Medical Man, and he winked at me
Chapter 2

I think that at that time none of us quite believed in the Time Machine. The fact is, the
Time Traveller was one of those men who are too clever to be believed: you never felt that
you saw all round him; you always suspected some subtle reserve, some ingenuity in ambush,
behind his lucid frankness. Had Filby shown the model and explained the matter in the Time
Traveller’s words, we should have shown him far less scepticism. For we should have
perceived his motives; a pork butcher could understand Filby. But the Time Traveller had
more than a touch of whim among his elements, and we distrusted him. Things that would
have made the frame of a less clever man seemed tricks in his hands. It is a mistake to do
things too easily. The serious people who took him seriously never felt quite sure of his
deportment; they were somehow aware that trusting their reputations for judgment with him
was like furnishing a nursery with egg-shell china. So I don’t think any of us said very much
about time travelling in the interval between that Thursday and the next, though its odd
potentialities ran, no doubt, in most of our minds: its plausibility, that is, its practical
incredibleness, the curious possibilities of anachronism and of utter confusion it suggested.
For my own part, I was particularly preoccupied with the trick of the model. That I remember
discussing with the Medical Man, whom I met on Friday at the Linnaean. He said he had seen
a similar thing at Tubingen, and laid considerable stress on the blowing out of the candle. But
how the trick was done he could not explain.
The next Thursday I went again to Richmond — I suppose I was one of the Time
Traveller’s most constant guests — and, arriving late, found four or five men already
assembled in his drawing-room. The Medical Man was standing before the fire with a sheet of
paper in one hand and his watch in the other. I looked round for the Time Traveller, and —
‘It’s half-past seven now,’ said the Medical Man. ‘I suppose we’d better have dinner?’
‘Where’s ——?’ said I, naming our host.
‘You’ve just come? It’s rather odd. He’s unavoidably detained. He asks me in this note to
lead off with dinner at seven if he’s not back. Says he’ll explain when he comes.’
‘It seems a pity to let the dinner spoil,’ said the Editor of a well-known daily paper; and
thereupon the Doctor rang the bell.
The Psychologist was the only person besides the Doctor and myself who had attended
the previous dinner. The other men were Blank, the Editor aforementioned, a certain
journalist, and another — a quiet, shy man with a beard — whom I didn’t know, and who, as
far as my observation went, never opened his mouth all the evening. There was some
speculation at the dinner-table about the Time Traveller’s absence, and I suggested time
travelling, in a half-jocular spirit. The Editor wanted that explained to him, and the Psychologist
volunteered a wooden account of the ‘ingenious paradox and trick’ we had witnessed that day
week. He was in the midst of his exposition when the door from the corridor opened slowly
and without noise. I was facing the door, and saw it first. ‘Hallo!’ I said. ‘At last!’ And the door
opened wider, and the Time Traveller stood before us. I gave a cry of surprise. ‘Good
heavens! man, what’s the matter?’ cried the Medical Man, who saw him next. And the whole
tableful turned towards the door.
He was in an amazing plight. His coat was dusty and dirty, and smeared with green down
the sleeves; his hair disordered, and as it seemed to me greyer — either with dust and dirt or
because its colour had actually faded. His face was ghastly pale; his chin had a brown cut on
it — a cut half healed; his expression was haggard and drawn, as by intense suffering. For a
moment he hesitated in the doorway, as if he had been dazzled by the light. Then he came
into the room. He walked with just such a limp as I have seen in footsore tramps. We staredat him in silence, expecting him to speak.
He said not a word, but came painfully to the table, and made a motion towards the wine.
The Editor filled a glass of champagne, and pushed it towards him. He drained it, and it
seemed to do him good: for he looked round the table, and the ghost of his old smile flickered
across his face. ‘What on earth have you been up to, man?’ said the Doctor. The Time
Traveller did not seem to hear. ‘Don’t let me disturb you,’ he said, with a certain faltering
articulation. ‘I’m all right.’ He stopped, held out his glass for more, and took it off at a draught.
‘That’s good,’ he said. His eyes grew brighter, and a faint colour came into his cheeks. His
glance flickered over our faces with a certain dull approval, and then went round the warm and
comfortable room. Then he spoke again, still as it were feeling his way among his words. ‘I’m
going to wash and dress, and then I’ll come down and explain things... Save me some of that
mutton. I’m starving for a bit of meat.’
He looked across at the Editor, who was a rare visitor, and hoped he was all right. The
Editor began a question. ‘Tell you presently,’ said the Time Traveller. ‘I’m — funny! Be all right
in a minute.’
He put down his glass, and walked towards the staircase door. Again I remarked his
lameness and the soft padding sound of his footfall, and standing up in my place, I saw his
feet as he went out. He had nothing on them but a pair of tattered blood-stained socks. Then
the door closed upon him. I had half a mind to follow, till I remembered how he detested any
fuss about himself. For a minute, perhaps, my mind was wool-gathering. Then, ‘Remarkable
Behaviour of an Eminent Scientist,’ I heard the Editor say, thinking (after his wont) in
headlines. And this brought my attention back to the bright dinner-table.
‘What’s the game?’ said the Journalist. ‘Has he been doing the Amateur Cadger? I don’t
follow.’ I met the eye of the Psychologist, and read my own interpretation in his face. I thought
of the Time Traveller limping painfully upstairs. I don’t think any one else had noticed his
The first to recover completely from this surprise was the Medical Man, who rang the bell
— the Time Traveller hated to have servants waiting at dinner — for a hot plate. At that the
Editor turned to his knife and fork with a grunt, and the Silent Man followed suit. The dinner
was resumed. Conversation was exclamatory for a little while, with gaps of wonderment; and
then the Editor got fervent in his curiosity. ‘Does our friend eke out his modest income with a
crossing? or has he his Nebuchadnezzar phases?’ he inquired. ‘I feel assured it’s this
business of the Time Machine,’ I said, and took up the Psychologist’s account of our previous
meeting. The new guests were frankly incredulous. The Editor raised objections. ‘What was
this time travelling? A man couldn’t cover himself with dust by rolling in a paradox, could he?’
And then, as the idea came home to him, he resorted to caricature. Hadn’t they any
clothesbrushes in the Future? The Journalist too, would not believe at any price, and joined the Editor
in the easy work of heaping ridicule on the whole thing. They were both the new kind of
journalist — very joyous, irreverent young men. ‘Our Special Correspondent in the Day after
To-morrow reports,’ the Journalist was saying — or rather shouting — when the Time
Traveller came back. He was dressed in ordinary evening clothes, and nothing save his
haggard look remained of the change that had startled me.
‘I say,’ said the Editor hilariously, ‘these chaps here say you have been travelling into the
middle of next week! Tell us all about little Rosebery, will you? What will you take for the lot?’
The Time Traveller came to the place reserved for him without a word. He smiled quietly,
in his old way. ‘Where’s my mutton?’ he said. ‘What a treat it is to stick a fork into meat again!’
‘Story!’ cried the Editor.
‘Story be damned!’ said the Time Traveller. ‘I want something to eat. I won’t say a word
until I get some peptone into my arteries. Thanks. And the salt.’
‘One word,’ said I. ‘Have you been time travelling?’
‘Yes,’ said the Time Traveller, with his mouth full, nodding his head.‘I’d give a shilling a line for a verbatim note,’ said the Editor. The Time Traveller pushed
his glass towards the Silent Man and rang it with his fingernail; at which the Silent Man, who
had been staring at his face, started convulsively, and poured him wine. The rest of the dinner
was uncomfortable. For my own part, sudden questions kept on rising to my lips, and I dare
say it was the same with the others. The Journalist tried to relieve the tension by telling
anecdotes of Hettie Potter. The Time Traveller devoted his attention to his dinner, and
displayed the appetite of a tramp. The Medical Man smoked a cigarette, and watched the
Time Traveller through his eyelashes. The Silent Man seemed even more clumsy than usual,
and drank champagne with regularity and determination out of sheer nervousness. At last the
Time Traveller pushed his plate away, and looked round us. ‘I suppose I must apologize,’ he
said. ‘I was simply starving. I’ve had a most amazing time.’ He reached out his hand for a
cigar, and cut the end. ‘But come into the smoking-room. It’s too long a story to tell over
greasy plates.’ And ringing the bell in passing, he led the way into the adjoining room.
‘You have told Blank, and Dash, and Chose about the machine?’ he said to me, leaning
back in his easy-chair and naming the three new guests.
‘But the thing’s a mere paradox,’ said the Editor.
‘I can’t argue to-night. I don’t mind telling you the story, but I can’t argue. I will,’ he went
on, ‘tell you the story of what has happened to me, if you like, but you must refrain from
interruptions. I want to tell it. Badly. Most of it will sound like lying. So be it! It’s true — every
word of it, all the same. I was in my laboratory at four o’clock, and since then... I’ve lived eight
days... such days as no human being ever lived before! I’m nearly worn out, but I shan’t sleep
till I’ve told this thing over to you. Then I shall go to bed. But no interruptions! Is it agreed?’
‘Agreed,’ said the Editor, and the rest of us echoed ‘Agreed.’ And with that the Time
Traveller began his story as I have set it forth. He sat back in his chair at first, and spoke like
a weary man. Afterwards he got more animated. In writing it down I feel with only too much
keenness the inadequacy of pen and ink — and, above all, my own inadequacy — to express
its quality. You read, I will suppose, attentively enough; but you cannot see the speaker’s
white, sincere face in the bright circle of the little lamp, nor hear the intonation of his voice.
You cannot know how his expression followed the turns of his story! Most of us hearers were
in shadow, for the candles in the smoking-room had not been lighted, and only the face of the
Journalist and the legs of the Silent Man from the knees downward were illuminated. At first
we glanced now and again at each other. After a time we ceased to do that, and looked only
at the Time Traveller’s face.
Chapter 3

‘I told some of you last Thursday of the principles of the Time Machine, and showed you
the actual thing itself, incomplete in the workshop. There it is now, a little travel-worn, truly;
and one of the ivory bars is cracked, and a brass rail bent; but the rest of it’s sound enough. I
expected to finish it on Friday, but on Friday, when the putting together was nearly done, I
found that one of the nickel bars was exactly one inch too short, and this I had to get remade;
so that the thing was not complete until this morning. It was at ten o’clock to-day that the first
of all Time Machines began its career. I gave it a last tap, tried all the screws again, put one
more drop of oil on the quartz rod, and sat myself in the saddle. I suppose a suicide who
holds a pistol to his skull feels much the same wonder at what will come next as I felt then. I
took the starting lever in one hand and the stopping one in the other, pressed the first, and
almost immediately the second. I seemed to reel; I felt a nightmare sensation of falling; and,
looking round, I saw the laboratory exactly as before. Had anything happened? For a moment
I suspected that my intellect had tricked me. Then I noted the clock. A moment before, as it
seemed, it had stood at a minute or so past ten; now it was nearly half-past three!
‘I drew a breath, set my teeth, gripped the starting lever with both hands, and went off
with a thud. The laboratory got hazy and went dark. Mrs. Watchett came in and walked,
apparently without seeing me, towards the garden door. I suppose it took her a minute or so
to traverse the place, but to me she seemed to shoot across the room like a rocket. I pressed
the lever over to its extreme position. The night came like the turning out of a lamp, and in
another moment came to-morrow. The laboratory grew faint and hazy, then fainter and ever
fainter. To-morrow night came black, then day again, night again, day again, faster and faster
still. An eddying murmur filled my ears, and a strange, dumb confusedness descended on my
‘I am afraid I cannot convey the peculiar sensations of time travelling. They are
excessively unpleasant. There is a feeling exactly like that one has upon a switchback — of a
helpless headlong motion! I felt the same horrible anticipation, too, of an imminent smash. As
I put on pace, night followed day like the flapping of a black wing. The dim suggestion of the
laboratory seemed presently to fall away from me, and I saw the sun hopping swiftly across
the sky, leaping it every minute, and every minute marking a day. I supposed the laboratory
had been destroyed and I had come into the open air. I had a dim impression of scaffolding,
but I was already going too fast to be conscious of any moving things. The slowest snail that
ever crawled dashed by too fast for me. The twinkling succession of darkness and light was
excessively painful to the eye. Then, in the intermittent darknesses, I saw the moon spinning
swiftly through her quarters from new to full, and had a faint glimpse of the circling stars.
Presently, as I went on, still gaining velocity, the palpitation of night and day merged into one
continuous greyness; the sky took on a wonderful deepness of blue, a splendid luminous color
like that of early twilight; the jerking sun became a streak of fire, a brilliant arch, in space; the
moon a fainter fluctuating band; and I could see nothing of the stars, save now and then a
brighter circle flickering in the blue.
‘The landscape was misty and vague. I was still on the hill-side upon which this house
now stands, and the shoulder rose above me grey and dim. I saw trees growing and changing
like puffs of vapour, now brown, now green; they grew, spread, shivered, and passed away. I
saw huge buildings rise up faint and fair, and pass like dreams. The whole surface of the earth
seemed changed — melting and flowing under my eyes. The little hands upon the dials that
registered my speed raced round faster and faster. Presently I noted that the sun belt swayed
up and down, from solstice to solstice, in a minute or less, and that consequently my pacewas over a year a minute; and minute by minute the white snow flashed across the world, and
vanished, and was followed by the bright, brief green of spring.
‘The unpleasant sensations of the start were less poignant now. They merged at last into
a kind of hysterical exhilaration. I remarked indeed a clumsy swaying of the machine, for
which I was unable to account. But my mind was too confused to attend to it, so with a kind of
madness growing upon me, I flung myself into futurity. At first I scarce thought of stopping,
scarce thought of anything but these new sensations. But presently a fresh series of
impressions grew up in my mind — a certain curiosity and therewith a certain dread — until at
last they took complete possession of me. What strange developments of humanity, what
wonderful advances upon our rudimentary civilization, I thought, might not appear when I
came to look nearly into the dim elusive world that raced and fluctuated before my eyes! I saw
great and splendid architecture rising about me, more massive than any buildings of our own
time, and yet, as it seemed, built of glimmer and mist. I saw a richer green flow up the
hillside, and remain there, without any wintry intermission. Even through the veil of my confusion
the earth seemed very fair. And so my mind came round to the business of stopping,
‘The peculiar risk lay in the possibility of my finding some substance in the space which I,
or the machine, occupied. So long as I travelled at a high velocity through time, this scarcely
mattered; I was, so to speak, attenuated — was slipping like a vapour through the interstices
of intervening substances! But to come to a stop involved the jamming of myself, molecule by
molecule, into whatever lay in my way; meant bringing my atoms into such intimate contact
with those of the obstacle that a profound chemical reaction — possibly a far-reaching
explosion — would result, and blow myself and my apparatus out of all possible dimensions —
into the Unknown. This possibility had occurred to me again and again while I was making the
machine; but then I had cheerfully accepted it as an unavoidable risk — one of the risks a
man has got to take! Now the risk was inevitable, I no longer saw it in the same cheerful light.
The fact is that insensibly, the absolute strangeness of everything, the sickly jarring and
swaying of the machine, above all, the feeling of prolonged falling, had absolutely upset my
nerve. I told myself that I could never stop, and with a gust of petulance I resolved to stop
forthwith. Like an impatient fool, I lugged over the lever, and incontinently the thing went
reeling over, and I was flung headlong through the air.
‘There was the sound of a clap of thunder in my ears. I may have been stunned for a
moment. A pitiless hail was hissing round me, and I was sitting on soft turf in front of the
overset machine. Everything still seemed grey, but presently I remarked that the confusion in
my ears was gone. I looked round me. I was on what seemed to be a little lawn in a garden,
surrounded by rhododendron bushes, and I noticed that their mauve and purple blossoms
were dropping in a shower under the beating of the hail-stones. The rebounding, dancing hail
hung in a cloud over the machine, and drove along the ground like smoke. In a moment I was
wet to the skin. “Fine hospitality,” said I, “to a man who has travelled innumerable years to see
‘Presently I thought what a fool I was to get wet. I stood up and looked round me. A
colossal figure, carved apparently in some white stone, loomed indistinctly beyond the
rhododendrons through the hazy downpour. But all else of the world was invisible.
‘My sensations would be hard to describe. As the columns of hail grew thinner, I saw the
white figure more distinctly. It was very large, for a silver birch-tree touched its shoulder. It
was of white marble, in shape something like a winged sphinx, but the wings, instead of being
carried vertically at the sides, were spread so that it seemed to hover. The pedestal, it
appeared to me, was of bronze, and was thick with verdigris. It chanced that the face was
towards me; the sightless eyes seemed to watch me; there was the faint shadow of a smile
on the lips. It was greatly weather-worn, and that imparted an unpleasant suggestion of
disease. I stood looking at it for a little space — half a minute, perhaps, or half an hour. It
seemed to advance and to recede as the hail drove before it denser or thinner. At last I toremy eyes from it for a moment and saw that the hail curtain had worn threadbare, and that the
sky was lightening with the promise of the Sun.
‘I looked up again at the crouching white shape, and the full temerity of my voyage came
suddenly upon me. What might appear when that hazy curtain was altogether withdrawn?
What might not have happened to men? What if cruelty had grown into a common passion?
What if in this interval the race had lost its manliness and had developed into something
inhuman, unsympathetic, and overwhelmingly powerful? I might seem some old-world savage
animal, only the more dreadful and disgusting for our common likeness — a foul creature to
be incontinently slain.
‘Already I saw other vast shapes — huge buildings with intricate parapets and tall
columns, with a wooded hill-side dimly creeping in upon me through the lessening storm. I was
seized with a panic fear. I turned frantically to the Time Machine, and strove hard to readjust
it. As I did so the shafts of the sun smote through the thunderstorm. The grey downpour was
swept aside and vanished like the trailing garments of a ghost. Above me, in the intense blue
of the summer sky, some faint brown shreds of cloud whirled into nothingness. The great
buildings about me stood out clear and distinct, shining with the wet of the thunderstorm, and
picked out in white by the unmelted hailstones piled along their courses. I felt naked in a
strange world. I felt as perhaps a bird may feel in the clear air, knowing the hawk wings above
and will swoop. My fear grew to frenzy. I took a breathing space, set my teeth, and again
grappled fiercely, wrist and knee, with the machine. It gave under my desperate onset and
turned over. It struck my chin violently. One hand on the saddle, the other on the lever, I
stood panting heavily in attitude to mount again.
‘But with this recovery of a prompt retreat my courage recovered. I looked more
curiously and less fearfully at this world of the remote future. In a circular opening, high up in
the wall of the nearer house, I saw a group of figures clad in rich soft robes. They had seen
me, and their faces were directed towards me.
‘Then I heard voices approaching me. Coming through the bushes by the White Sphinx
were the heads and shoulders of men running. One of these emerged in a pathway leading
straight to the little lawn upon which I stood with my machine. He was a slight creature —
perhaps four feet high — clad in a purple tunic, girdled at the waist with a leather belt. Sandals
or buskins — I could not clearly distinguish which — were on his feet; his legs were bare to
the knees, and his head was bare. Noticing that, I noticed for the first time how warm the air
‘He struck me as being a very beautiful and graceful creature, but indescribably frail. His
flushed face reminded me of the more beautiful kind of consumptive — that hectic beauty of
which we used to hear so much. At the sight of him I suddenly regained confidence. I took my
hands from the machine.
Chapter 4

‘In another moment we were standing face to face, I and this fragile thing out of futurity.
He came straight up to me and laughed into my eyes. The absence from his bearing of any
sign of fear struck me at once. Then he turned to the two others who were following him and
spoke to them in a strange and very sweet and liquid tongue.
‘There were others coming, and presently a little group of perhaps eight or ten of these
exquisite creatures were about me. One of them addressed me. It came into my head, oddly
enough, that my voice was too harsh and deep for them. So I shook my head, and, pointing to
my ears, shook it again. He came a step forward, hesitated, and then touched my hand. Then
I felt other soft little tentacles upon my back and shoulders. They wanted to make sure I was
real. There was nothing in this at all alarming. Indeed, there was something in these pretty
little people that inspired confidence — a graceful gentleness, a certain childlike ease. And
besides, they looked so frail that I could fancy myself flinging the whole dozen of them about
like nine-pins. But I made a sudden motion to warn them when I saw their little pink hands
feeling at the Time Machine. Happily then, when it was not too late, I thought of a danger I
had hitherto forgotten, and reaching over the bars of the machine I unscrewed the little levers
that would set it in motion, and put these in my pocket. Then I turned again to see what I
could do in the way of communication.
‘And then, looking more nearly into their features, I saw some further peculiarities in their
Dresden-china type of prettiness. Their hair, which was uniformly curly, came to a sharp end
at the neck and cheek; there was not the faintest suggestion of it on the face, and their ears
were singularly minute. The mouths were small, with bright red, rather thin lips, and the little
chins ran to a point. The eyes were large and mild; and — this may seem egotism on my part
— I fancied even that there was a certain lack of the interest I might have expected in them.
‘As they made no effort to communicate with me, but simply stood round me smiling and
speaking in soft cooing notes to each other, I began the conversation. I pointed to the Time
Machine and to myself. Then hesitating for a moment how to express time, I pointed to the
sun. At once a quaintly pretty little figure in chequered purple and white followed my gesture,
and then astonished me by imitating the sound of thunder.
‘For a moment I was staggered, though the import of his gesture was plain enough. The
question had come into my mind abruptly: were these creatures fools? You may hardly
understand how it took me. You see I had always anticipated that the people of the year Eight
Hundred and Two Thousand odd would be incredibly in front of us in knowledge, art,
everything. Then one of them suddenly asked me a question that showed him to be on the
intellectual level of one of our five-year-old children — asked me, in fact, if I had come from
the sun in a thunderstorm! It let loose the judgment I had suspended upon their clothes, their
frail light limbs, and fragile features. A flow of disappointment rushed across my mind. For a
moment I felt that I had built the Time Machine in vain.
‘I nodded, pointed to the sun, and gave them such a vivid rendering of a thunderclap as
startled them. They all withdrew a pace or so and bowed. Then came one laughing towards
me, carrying a chain of beautiful flowers altogether new to me, and put it about my neck. The
idea was received with melodious applause; and presently they were all running to and fro for
flowers, and laughingly flinging them upon me until I was almost smothered with blossom. You
who have never seen the like can scarcely imagine what delicate and wonderful flowers
countless years of culture had created. Then someone suggested that their plaything should
be exhibited in the nearest building, and so I was led past the sphinx of white marble, which
had seemed to watch me all the while with a smile at my astonishment, towards a vast greyedifice of fretted stone. As I went with them the memory of my confident anticipations of a
profoundly grave and intellectual posterity came, with irresistible merriment, to my mind.
‘The building had a huge entry, and was altogether of colossal dimensions. I was
naturally most occupied with the growing crowd of little people, and with the big open portals
that yawned before me shadowy and mysterious. My general impression of the world I saw
over their heads was a tangled waste of beautiful bushes and flowers, a long neglected and
yet weedless garden. I saw a number of tall spikes of strange white flowers, measuring a foot
perhaps across the spread of the waxen petals. They grew scattered, as if wild, among the
variegated shrubs, but, as I say, I did not examine them closely at this time. The Time
Machine was left deserted on the turf among the rhododendrons.
‘The arch of the doorway was richly carved, but naturally I did not observe the carving
very narrowly, though I fancied I saw suggestions of old Phoenician decorations as I passed
through, and it struck me that they were very badly broken and weather-worn. Several more
brightly clad people met me in the doorway, and so we entered, I, dressed in dingy
nineteenth-century garments, looking grotesque enough, garlanded with flowers, and
surrounded by an eddying mass of bright, soft-colored robes and shining white limbs, in a
melodious whirl of laughter and laughing speech.
‘The big doorway opened into a proportionately great hall hung with brown. The roof was
in shadow, and the windows, partially glazed with coloured glass and partially unglazed,
admitted a tempered light. The floor was made up of huge blocks of some very hard white
metal, not plates nor slabs — blocks, and it was so much worn, as I judged by the going to
and fro of past generations, as to be deeply channelled along the more frequented ways.
Transverse to the length were innumerable tables made of slabs of polished stone, raised
perhaps a foot from the floor, and upon these were heaps of fruits. Some I recognized as a
kind of hypertrophied raspberry and orange, but for the most part they were strange.
‘Between the tables was scattered a great number of cushions. Upon these my
conductors seated themselves, signing for me to do likewise. With a pretty absence of
ceremony they began to eat the fruit with their hands, flinging peel and stalks, and so forth,
into the round openings in the sides of the tables. I was not loath to follow their example, for I
felt thirsty and hungry. As I did so I surveyed the hall at my leisure.
‘And perhaps the thing that struck me most was its dilapidated look. The stained-glass
windows, which displayed only a geometrical pattern, were broken in many places, and the
curtains that hung across the lower end were thick with dust. And it caught my eye that the
corner of the marble table near me was fractured. Nevertheless, the general effect was
extremely rich and picturesque. There were, perhaps, a couple of hundred people dining in the
hall, and most of them, seated as near to me as they could come, were watching me with
interest, their little eyes shining over the fruit they were eating. All were clad in the same soft
and yet strong, silky material.
‘Fruit, by the by, was all their diet. These people of the remote future were strict
vegetarians, and while I was with them, in spite of some carnal cravings, I had to be
frugivorous also. Indeed, I found afterwards that horses, cattle, sheep, dogs, had followed the
Ichthyosaurus into extinction. But the fruits were very delightful; one, in particular, that
seemed to be in season all the time I was there — a floury thing in a three-sided husk — was
especially good, and I made it my staple. At first I was puzzled by all these strange fruits, and
by the strange flowers I saw, but later I began to perceive their import.
‘However, I am telling you of my fruit dinner in the distant future now. So soon as my
appetite was a little checked, I determined to make a resolute attempt to learn the speech of
these new men of mine. Clearly that was the next thing to do. The fruits seemed a convenient
thing to begin upon, and holding one of these up I began a series of interrogative sounds and
gestures. I had some considerable difficulty in conveying my meaning. At first my efforts met
with a stare of surprise or inextinguishable laughter, but presently a fair-haired little creatureseemed to grasp my intention and repeated a name. They had to chatter and explain the
business at great length to each other, and my first attempts to make the exquisite little
sounds of their language caused an immense amount of amusement. However, I felt like a
schoolmaster amidst children, and persisted, and presently I had a score of noun substantives
at least at my command; and then I got to demonstrative pronouns, and even the verb “to
eat.” But it was slow work, and the little people soon tired and wanted to get away from my
interrogations, so I determined, rather of necessity, to let them give their lessons in little doses
when they felt inclined. And very little doses I found they were before long, for I never met
people more indolent or more easily fatigued.
‘A queer thing I soon discovered about my little hosts, and that was their lack of interest.
They would come to me with eager cries of astonishment, like children, but like children they
would soon stop examining me and wander away after some other toy. The dinner and my
conversational beginnings ended, I noted for the first time that almost all those who had
surrounded me at first were gone. It is odd, too, how speedily I came to disregard these little
people. I went out through the portal into the sunlit world again as soon as my hunger was
satisfied. I was continually meeting more of these men of the future, who would follow me a
little distance, chatter and laugh about me, and, having smiled and gesticulated in a friendly
way, leave me again to my own devices.
‘The calm of evening was upon the world as I emerged from the great hall, and the
scene was lit by the warm glow of the setting sun. At first things were very confusing.
Everything was so entirely different from the world I had known — even the flowers. The big
building I had left was situated on the slope of a broad river valley, but the Thames had shifted
perhaps a mile from its present position. I resolved to mount to the summit of a crest perhaps
a mile and a half away, from which I could get a wider view of this our planet in the year Eight
Hundred and Two Thousand Seven Hundred and One A.D. For that, I should explain, was the
date the little dials of my machine recorded.
‘As I walked I was watching for every impression that could possibly help to explain the
condition of ruinous splendour in which I found the world — for ruinous it was. A little way up
the hill, for instance, was a great heap of granite, bound together by masses of aluminium, a
vast labyrinth of precipitous walls and crumpled heaps, amidst which were thick heaps of very
beautiful pagoda-like plants — nettles possibly — but wonderfully tinted with brown about the
leaves, and incapable of stinging. It was evidently the derelict remains of some vast structure,
to what end built I could not determine. It was here that I was destined, at a later date, to
have a very strange experience — the first intimation of a still stranger discovery — but of that
I will speak in its proper place.
‘Looking round with a sudden thought, from a terrace on which I rested for a while, I
realized that there were no small houses to be seen. Apparently the single house, and
possibly even the household, had vanished. Here and there among the greenery were
palacelike buildings, but the house and the cottage, which form such characteristic features of our
own English landscape, had disappeared.
‘“Communism,” said I to myself.
‘And on the heels of that came another thought. I looked at the half-dozen little figures
that were following me. Then, in a flash, I perceived that all had the same form of costume,
the same soft hairless visage, and the same girlish rotundity of limb. It may seem strange,
perhaps, that I had not noticed this before. But everything was so strange. Now, I saw the fact
plainly enough. In costume, and in all the differences of texture and bearing that now mark off
the sexes from each other, these people of the future were alike. And the children seemed to
my eyes to be but the miniatures of their parents. I judged, then, that the children of that time
were extremely precocious, physically at least, and I found afterwards abundant verification of
my opinion.
‘Seeing the ease and security in which these people were living, I felt that this closeresemblance of the sexes was after all what one would expect; for the strength of a man and
the softness of a woman, the institution of the family, and the differentiation of occupations
are mere militant necessities of an age of physical force; where population is balanced and
abundant, much childbearing becomes an evil rather than a blessing to the State; where
violence comes but rarely and off-spring are secure, there is less necessity — indeed there is
no necessity — for an efficient family, and the specialization of the sexes with reference to
their children’s needs disappears. We see some beginnings of this even in our own time, and
in this future age it was complete. This, I must remind you, was my speculation at the time.
Later, I was to appreciate how far it fell short of the reality.
‘While I was musing upon these things, my attention was attracted by a pretty little
structure, like a well under a cupola. I thought in a transitory way of the oddness of wells still
existing, and then resumed the thread of my speculations. There were no large buildings
towards the top of the hill, and as my walking powers were evidently miraculous, I was
presently left alone for the first time. With a strange sense of freedom and adventure I pushed
on up to the crest.
‘There I found a seat of some yellow metal that I did not recognize, corroded in places
with a kind of pinkish rust and half smothered in soft moss, the arm-rests cast and filed into
the resemblance of griffins’ heads. I sat down on it, and I surveyed the broad view of our old
world under the sunset of that long day. It was as sweet and fair a view as I have ever seen.
The sun had already gone below the horizon and the west was flaming gold, touched with
some horizontal bars of purple and crimson. Below was the valley of the Thames, in which the
river lay like a band of burnished steel. I have already spoken of the great palaces dotted
about among the variegated greenery, some in ruins and some still occupied. Here and there
rose a white or silvery figure in the waste garden of the earth, here and there came the sharp
vertical line of some cupola or obelisk. There were no hedges, no signs of proprietary rights,
no evidences of agriculture; the whole earth had become a garden.
‘So watching, I began to put my interpretation upon the things I had seen, and as it
shaped itself to me that evening, my interpretation was something in this way. (Afterwards I
found I had got only a half-truth — or only a glimpse of one facet of the truth.)
‘It seemed to me that I had happened upon humanity upon the wane. The ruddy sunset
set me thinking of the sunset of mankind. For the first time I began to realize an odd
consequence of the social effort in which we are at present engaged. And yet, come to think,
it is a logical consequence enough. Strength is the outcome of need; security sets a premium
on feebleness. The work of ameliorating the conditions of life — the true civilizing process that
makes life more and more secure — had gone steadily on to a climax. One triumph of a
united humanity over Nature had followed another. Things that are now mere dreams had
become projects deliberately put in hand and carried forward. And the harvest was what I
‘After all, the sanitation and the agriculture of to-day are still in the rudimentary stage.
The science of our time has attacked but a little department of the field of human disease, but
even so, it spreads its operations very steadily and persistently. Our agriculture and
horticulture destroy a weed just here and there and cultivate perhaps a score or so of
wholesome plants, leaving the greater number to fight out a balance as they can. We improve
our favourite plants and animals — and how few they are — gradually by selective breeding;
now a new and better peach, now a seedless grape, now a sweeter and larger flower, now a
more convenient breed of cattle. We improve them gradually, because our ideals are vague
and tentative, and our knowledge is very limited; because Nature, too, is shy and slow in our
clumsy hands. Some day all this will be better organized, and still better. That is the drift of the
current in spite of the eddies. The whole world will be intelligent, educated, and co-operating;
things will move faster and faster towards the subjugation of Nature. In the end, wisely and
carefully we shall readjust the balance of animal and vegetable me to suit our human needs.‘This adjustment, I say, must have been done, and done well; done indeed for all Time, in
the space of Time across which my machine had leaped. The air was free from gnats, the
earth from weeds or fungi; everywhere were fruits and sweet and delightful flowers; brilliant
butterflies flew hither and thither. The ideal of preventive medicine was attained. Diseases had
been stamped out. I saw no evidence of any contagious diseases during all my stay. And I
shall have to tell you later that even the processes of putrefaction and decay had been
profoundly affected by these changes.
‘Social triumphs, too, had been effected. I saw mankind housed in splendid shelters,
gloriously clothed, and as yet I had found them engaged in no toil. There were no signs of
struggle, neither social nor economical struggle. The shop, the advertisement, traffic, all that
commerce which constitutes the body of our world, was gone. It was natural on that golden
evening that I should jump at the idea of a social paradise. The difficulty of increasing
population had been met, I guessed, and population had ceased to increase.
‘But with this change in condition comes inevitably adaptations to the change. What,
unless biological science is a mass of errors, is the cause of human intelligence and vigour?
Hardship and freedom: conditions under which the active, strong, and subtle survive and the
weaker go to the wall; conditions that put a premium upon the loyal alliance of capable men,
upon self-restraint, patience, and decision. And the institution of the family, and the emotions
that arise therein, the fierce jealousy, the tenderness for offspring, parental self-devotion, all
found their justification and support in the imminent dangers of the young. Now, where are
these imminent dangers? There is a sentiment arising, and it will grow, against connubial
jealousy, against fierce maternity, against passion of all sorts; unnecessary things now, and
things that make us uncomfortable, savage survivals, discords in a refined and pleasant life.
‘I thought of the physical slightness of the people, their lack of intelligence, and those big
abundant ruins, and it strengthened my belief in a perfect conquest of Nature. For after the
battle comes Quiet. Humanity had been strong, energetic, and intelligent, and had used all its
abundant vitality to alter the conditions under which it lived. And now came the reaction of the
altered conditions.
‘Under the new conditions of perfect comfort and security, that restless energy, that with
us is strength, would become weakness. Even in our own time certain tendencies and desires,
once necessary to survival, are a constant source of failure. Physical courage and the love of
battle, for instance, are no great help — may even be hindrances — to a civilized man. And in
a state of physical balance and security, power, intellectual as well as physical, would be out
of place. For countless years I judged there had been no danger of war or solitary violence, no
danger from wild beasts, no wasting disease to require strength of constitution, no need of
toil. For such a life, what we should call the weak are as well equipped as the strong, are
indeed no longer weak. Better equipped indeed they are, for the strong would be fretted by an
energy for which there was no outlet. No doubt the exquisite beauty of the buildings I saw was
the outcome of the last surgings of the now purposeless energy of mankind before it settled
down into perfect harmony with the conditions under which it lived — the flourish of that
triumph which began the last great peace. This has ever been the fate of energy in security; it
takes to art and to eroticism, and then come languor and decay.
‘Even this artistic impetus would at last die away — had almost died in the Time I saw.
To adorn themselves with flowers, to dance, to sing in the sunlight: so much was left of the
artistic spirit, and no more. Even that would fade in the end into a contented inactivity. We are
kept keen on the grindstone of pain and necessity, and, it seemed to me, that here was that
hateful grindstone broken at last!
‘As I stood there in the gathering dark I thought that in this simple explanation I had
mastered the problem of the world — mastered the whole secret of these delicious people.
Possibly the checks they had devised for the increase of population had succeeded too well,
and their numbers had rather diminished than kept stationary. That would account for theabandoned ruins. Very simple was my explanation, and plausible enough — as most wrong
theories are!
Chapter 5

‘As I stood there musing over this too perfect triumph of man, the full moon, yellow and
gibbous, came up out of an overflow of silver light in the north-east. The bright little figures
ceased to move about below, a noiseless owl flitted by, and I shivered with the chill of the
night. I determined to descend and find where I could sleep.
‘I looked for the building I knew. Then my eye travelled along to the figure of the White
Sphinx upon the pedestal of bronze, growing distinct as the light of the rising moon grew
brighter. I could see the silver birch against it. There was the tangle of rhododendron bushes,
black in the pale light, and there was the little lawn. I looked at the lawn again. A queer doubt
chilled my complacency. “No,” said I stoutly to myself, “that was not the lawn.”
‘But it was the lawn. For the white leprous face of the sphinx was towards it. Can you
imagine what I felt as this conviction came home to me? But you cannot. The Time Machine
was gone!
‘At once, like a lash across the face, came the possibility of losing my own age, of being
left helpless in this strange new world. The bare thought of it was an actual physical sensation.
I could feel it grip me at the throat and stop my breathing. In another moment I was in a
passion of fear and running with great leaping strides down the slope. Once I fell headlong
and cut my face; I lost no time in stanching the blood, but jumped up and ran on, with a warm
trickle down my cheek and chin. All the time I ran I was saying to myself: “They have moved it
a little, pushed it under the bushes out of the way.” Nevertheless, I ran with all my might. All
the time, with the certainty that sometimes comes with excessive dread, I knew that such
assurance was folly, knew instinctively that the machine was removed out of my reach. My
breath came with pain. I suppose I covered the whole distance from the hill crest to the little
lawn, two miles perhaps, in ten minutes. And I am not a young man. I cursed aloud, as I ran,
at my confident folly in leaving the machine, wasting good breath thereby. I cried aloud, and
none answered. Not a creature seemed to be stirring in that moonlit world.
‘When I reached the lawn my worst fears were realized. Not a trace of the thing was to
be seen. I felt faint and cold when I faced the empty space among the black tangle of bushes.
I ran round it furiously, as if the thing might be hidden in a corner, and then stopped abruptly,
with my hands clutching my hair. Above me towered the sphinx, upon the bronze pedestal,
white, shining, leprous, in the light of the rising moon. It seemed to smile in mockery of my
‘I might have consoled myself by imagining the little people had put the mechanism in
some shelter for me, had I not felt assured of their physical and intellectual inadequacy. That
is what dismayed me: the sense of some hitherto unsuspected power, through whose
intervention my invention had vanished. Yet, for one thing I felt assured: unless some other
age had produced its exact duplicate, the machine could not have moved in time. The
attachment of the levers — I will show you the method later — prevented any one from
tampering with it in that way when they were removed. It had moved, and was hid, only in
space. But then, where could it be?
‘I think I must have had a kind of frenzy. I remember running violently in and out among
the moonlit bushes all round the sphinx, and startling some white animal that, in the dim light,
I took for a small deer. I remember, too, late that night, beating the bushes with my clenched
fist until my knuckles were gashed and bleeding from the broken twigs. Then, sobbing and
raving in my anguish of mind, I went down to the great building of stone. The big hall was
dark, silent, and deserted. I slipped on the uneven floor, and fell over one of the malachite
tables, almost breaking my shin. I lit a match and went on past the dusty curtains, of which Ihave told you.
‘There I found a second great hall covered with cushions, upon which, perhaps, a score
or so of the little people were sleeping. I have no doubt they found my second appearance
strange enough, coming suddenly out of the quiet darkness with inarticulate noises and the
splutter and flare of a match. For they had forgotten about matches. “Where is my Time
Machine?” I began, bawling like an angry child, laying hands upon them and shaking them up
together. It must have been very queer to them. Some laughed, most of them looked sorely
frightened. When I saw them standing round me, it came into my head that I was doing as
foolish a thing as it was possible for me to do under the circumstances, in trying to revive the
sensation of fear. For, reasoning from their daylight behaviour, I thought that fear must be
‘Abruptly, I dashed down the match, and, knocking one of the people over in my course,
went blundering across the big dining-hall again, out under the moonlight. I heard cries of
terror and their little feet running and stumbling this way and that. I do not remember all I did
as the moon crept up the sky. I suppose it was the unexpected nature of my loss that
maddened me. I felt hopelessly cut off from my own kind — a strange animal in an unknown
world. I must have raved to and fro, screaming and crying upon God and Fate. I have a
memory of horrible fatigue, as the long night of despair wore away; of looking in this
impossible place and that; of groping among moon-lit ruins and touching strange creatures in
the black shadows; at last, of lying on the ground near the sphinx and weeping with absolute
wretchedness. I had nothing left but misery. Then I slept, and when I woke again it was full
day, and a couple of sparrows were hopping round me on the turf within reach of my arm.
‘I sat up in the freshness of the morning, trying to remember how I had got there, and
why I had such a profound sense of desertion and despair. Then things came clear in my
mind. With the plain, reasonable daylight, I could look my circumstances fairly in the face. I
saw the wild folly of my frenzy overnight, and I could reason with myself. “Suppose the
worst?” I said. “Suppose the machine altogether lost — perhaps destroyed? It behooves me
to be calm and patient, to learn the way of the people, to get a clear idea of the method of my
loss, and the means of getting materials and tools; so that in the end, perhaps, I may make
another.” That would be my only hope, perhaps, but better than despair. And, after all, it was
a beautiful and curious world.
‘But probably, the machine had only been taken away. Still, I must be calm and patient,
find its hiding-place, and recover it by force or cunning. And with that I scrambled to my feet
and looked about me, wondering where I could bathe. I felt weary, stiff, and travel-soiled. The
freshness of the morning made me desire an equal freshness. I had exhausted my emotion.
Indeed, as I went about my business, I found myself wondering at my intense excitement
overnight. I made a careful examination of the ground about the little lawn. I wasted some
time in futile questionings, conveyed, as well as I was able, to such of the little people as
came by. They all failed to understand my gestures; some were simply stolid, some thought it
was a jest and laughed at me. I had the hardest task in the world to keep my hands off their
pretty laughing faces. It was a foolish impulse, but the devil begotten of fear and blind anger
was ill curbed and still eager to take advantage of my perplexity. The turf gave better counsel.
I found a groove ripped in it, about midway between the pedestal of the sphinx and the marks
of my feet where, on arrival, I had struggled with the overturned machine. There were other
signs of removal about, with queer narrow footprints like those I could imagine made by a
sloth. This directed my closer attention to the pedestal. It was, as I think I have said, of
bronze. It was not a mere block, but highly decorated with deep framed panels on either side.
I went and rapped at these. The pedestal was hollow. Examining the panels with care I found
them discontinuous with the frames. There were no handles or keyholes, but possibly the
panels, if they were doors, as I supposed, opened from within. One thing was clear enough to
my mind. It took no very great mental effort to infer that my Time Machine was inside thatpedestal. But how it got there was a different problem.
‘I saw the heads of two orange-clad people coming through the bushes and under some
blossom-covered apple-trees towards me. I turned smiling to them and beckoned them to me.
They came, and then, pointing to the bronze pedestal, I tried to intimate my wish to open it.
But at my first gesture towards this they behaved very oddly. I don’t know how to convey their
expression to you. Suppose you were to use a grossly improper gesture to a delicate-minded
woman — it is how she would look. They went off as if they had received the last possible
insult. I tried a sweet-looking little chap in white next, with exactly the same result. Somehow,
his manner made me feel ashamed of myself. But, as you know, I wanted the Time Machine,
and I tried him once more. As he turned off, like the others, my temper got the better of me.
In three strides I was after him, had him by the loose part of his robe round the neck, and
began dragging him towards the sphinx. Then I saw the horror and repugnance of his face,
and all of a sudden I let him go.
‘But I was not beaten yet. I banged with my fist at the bronze panels. I thought I heard
something stir inside — to be explicit, I thought I heard a sound like a chuckle — but I must
have been mistaken. Then I got a big pebble from the river, and came and hammered till I
had flattened a coil in the decorations, and the verdigris came off in powdery flakes. The
delicate little people must have heard me hammering in gusty outbreaks a mile away on either
hand, but nothing came of it. I saw a crowd of them upon the slopes, looking furtively at me.
At last, hot and tired, I sat down to watch the place. But I was too restless to watch long; I am
too Occidental for a long vigil. I could work at a problem for years, but to wait inactive for
twenty-four hours — that is another matter.
‘I got up after a time, and began walking aimlessly through the bushes towards the hill
again. “Patience,” said I to myself. “If you want your machine again you must leave that
sphinx alone. If they mean to take your machine away, it’s little good your wrecking their
bronze panels, and if they don’t, you will get it back as soon as you can ask for it. To sit
among all those unknown things before a puzzle like that is hopeless. That way lies
monomania. Face this world. Learn its ways, watch it, be careful of too hasty guesses at its
meaning. In the end you will find clues to it all.” Then suddenly the humour of the situation
came into my mind: the thought of the years I had spent in study and toil to get into the future
age, and now my passion of anxiety to get out of it. I had made myself the most complicated
and the most hopeless trap that ever a man devised. Although it was at my own expense, I
could not help myself. I laughed aloud.
‘Going through the big palace, it seemed to me that the little people avoided me. It may
have been my fancy, or it may have had something to do with my hammering at the gates of
bronze. Yet I felt tolerably sure of the avoidance. I was careful, however, to show no concern
and to abstain from any pursuit of them, and in the course of a day or two things got back to
the old footing. I made what progress I could in the language, and in addition I pushed my
explorations here and there. Either I missed some subtle point or their language was
excessively simple — almost exclusively composed of concrete substantives and verbs. There
seemed to be few, if any, abstract terms, or little use of figurative language. Their sentences
were usually simple and of two words, and I failed to convey or understand any but the
simplest propositions. I determined to put the thought of my Time Machine and the mystery of
the bronze doors under the sphinx as much as possible in a corner of memory, until my
growing knowledge would lead me back to them in a natural way. Yet a certain feeling, you
may understand, tethered me in a circle of a few miles round the point of my arrival.
‘So far as I could see, all the world displayed the same exuberant richness as the
Thames valley. From every hill I climbed I saw the same abundance of splendid buildings,
endlessly varied in material and style, the same clustering thickets of evergreens, the same
blossom-laden trees and tree-ferns. Here and there water shone like silver, and beyond, the
land rose into blue undulating hills, and so faded into the serenity of the sky. A peculiarfeature, which presently attracted my attention, was the presence of certain circular wells,
several, as it seemed to me, of a very great depth. One lay by the path up the hill, which I had
followed during my first walk. Like the others, it was rimmed with bronze, curiously wrought,
and protected by a little cupola from the rain. Sitting by the side of these wells, and peering
down into the shafted darkness, I could see no gleam of water, nor could I start any reflection
with a lighted match. But in all of them I heard a certain sound: a thud-thud-thud, like the
beating of some big engine; and I discovered, from the flaring of my matches, that a steady
current of air set down the shafts. Further, I threw a scrap of paper into the throat of one,
and, instead of fluttering slowly down, it was at once sucked swiftly out of sight.
‘After a time, too, I came to connect these wells with tall towers standing here and there
upon the slopes; for above them there was often just such a flicker in the air as one sees on a
hot day above a sun-scorched beach. Putting things together, I reached a strong suggestion
of an extensive system of subterranean ventilation, whose true import it was difficult to
imagine. I was at first inclined to associate it with the sanitary apparatus of these people. It
was an obvious conclusion, but it was absolutely wrong.
‘And here I must admit that I learned very little of drains and bells and modes of
conveyance, and the like conveniences, during my time in this real future. In some of these
visions of Utopias and coming times which I have read, there is a vast amount of detail about
building, and social arrangements, and so forth. But while such details are easy enough to
obtain when the whole world is contained in one’s imagination, they are altogether inaccessible
to a real traveller amid such realities as I found here. Conceive the tale of London which a
negro, fresh from Central Africa, would take back to his tribe! What would he know of railway
companies, of social movements, of telephone and telegraph wires, of the Parcels Delivery
Company, and postal orders and the like? Yet we, at least, should be willing enough to explain
these things to him! And even of what he knew, how much could he make his untravelled
friend either apprehend or believe? Then, think how narrow the gap between a negro and a
white man of our own times, and how wide the interval between myself and these of the
Golden Age! I was sensible of much which was unseen, and which contributed to my comfort;
but save for a general impression of automatic organization, I fear I can convey very little of
the difference to your mind.
‘In the matter of sepulchre, for instance, I could see no signs of crematoria nor anything
suggestive of tombs. But it occurred to me that, possibly, there might be cemeteries (or
crematoria) somewhere beyond the range of my explorings. This, again, was a question I
deliberately put to myself, and my curiosity was at first entirely defeated upon the point. The
thing puzzled me, and I was led to make a further remark, which puzzled me still more: that
aged and infirm among this people there were none.
‘I must confess that my satisfaction with my first theories of an automatic civilization and
a decadent humanity did not long endure. Yet I could think of no other. Let me put my
difficulties. The several big palaces I had explored were mere living places, great dining-halls
and sleeping apartments. I could find no machinery, no appliances of any kind. Yet these
people were clothed in pleasant fabrics that must at times need renewal, and their sandals,
though undecorated, were fairly complex specimens of metalwork. Somehow such things
must be made. And the little people displayed no vestige of a creative tendency. There were
no shops, no workshops, no sign of importations among them. They spent all their time in
playing gently, in bathing in the river, in making love in a half-playful fashion, in eating fruit and
sleeping. I could not see how things were kept going.
‘Then, again, about the Time Machine: something, I knew not what, had taken it into the
hollow pedestal of the White Sphinx. Why? For the life of me I could not imagine. Those
waterless wells, too, those flickering pillars. I felt I lacked a clue. I felt — how shall I put it?
Suppose you found an inscription, with sentences here and there in excellent plain English,
and interpolated therewith, others made up of words, of letters even, absolutely unknown toyou? Well, on the third day of my visit, that was how the world of Eight Hundred and Two
Thousand Seven Hundred and One presented itself to me!
‘That day, too, I made a friend — of a sort. It happened that, as I was watching some of
the little people bathing in a shallow, one of them was seized with cramp and began drifting
downstream. The main current ran rather swiftly, but not too strongly for even a moderate
swimmer. It will give you an idea, therefore, of the strange deficiency in these creatures, when
I tell you that none made the slightest attempt to rescue the weakly crying little thing which
was drowning before their eyes. When I realized this, I hurriedly slipped off my clothes, and,
wading in at a point lower down, I caught the poor mite and drew her safe to land. A little
rubbing of the limbs soon brought her round, and I had the satisfaction of seeing she was all
right before I left her. I had got to such a low estimate of her kind that I did not expect any
gratitude from her. In that, however, I was wrong.
‘This happened in the morning. In the afternoon I met my little woman, as I believe it
was, as I was returning towards my centre from an exploration, and she received me with
cries of delight and presented me with a big garland of flowers — evidently made for me and
me alone. The thing took my imagination. Very possibly I had been feeling desolate. At any
rate I did my best to display my appreciation of the gift. We were soon seated together in a
little stone arbour, engaged in conversation, chiefly of smiles. The creature’s friendliness
affected me exactly as a child’s might have done. We passed each other flowers, and she
kissed my hands. I did the same to hers. Then I tried talk, and found that her name was
Weena, which, though I don’t know what it meant, somehow seemed appropriate enough.
That was the beginning of a queer friendship which lasted a week, and ended — as I will tell
‘She was exactly like a child. She wanted to be with me always. She tried to follow me
everywhere, and on my next journey out and about it went to my heart to tire her down, and
leave her at last, exhausted and calling after me rather plaintively. But the problems of the
world had to be mastered. I had not, I said to myself, come into the future to carry on a
miniature flirtation. Yet her distress when I left her was very great, her expostulations at the
parting were sometimes frantic, and I think, altogether, I had as much trouble as comfort from
her devotion. Nevertheless she was, somehow, a very great comfort. I thought it was mere
childish affection that made her cling to me. Until it was too late, I did not clearly know what I
had inflicted upon her when I left her. Nor until it was too late did I clearly understand what
she was to me. For, by merely seeming fond of me, and showing in her weak, futile way that
she cared for me, the little doll of a creature presently gave my return to the neighbourhood of
the White Sphinx almost the feeling of coming home; and I would watch for her tiny figure of
white and gold so soon as I came over the hill.
‘It was from her, too, that I learned that fear had not yet left the world. She was fearless
enough in the daylight, and she had the oddest confidence in me; for once, in a foolish
moment, I made threatening grimaces at her, and she simply laughed at them. But she
dreaded the dark, dreaded shadows, dreaded black things. Darkness to her was the one thing
dreadful. It was a singularly passionate emotion, and it set me thinking and observing. I
discovered then, among other things, that these little people gathered into the great houses
after dark, and slept in droves. To enter upon them without a light was to put them into a
tumult of apprehension. I never found one out of doors, or one sleeping alone within doors,
after dark. Yet I was still such a blockhead that I missed the lesson of that fear, and in spite of
Weena’s distress I insisted upon sleeping away from these slumbering multitudes.
‘It troubled her greatly, but in the end her odd affection for me triumphed, and for five of
the nights of our acquaintance, including the last night of all, she slept with her head pillowed
on my arm. But my story slips away from me as I speak of her. It must have been the night
before her rescue that I was awakened about dawn. I had been restless, dreaming most
disagreeably that I was drowned, and that sea anemones were feeling over my face with theirsoft palps. I woke with a start, and with an odd fancy that some greyish animal had just
rushed out of the chamber. I tried to get to sleep again, but I felt restless and uncomfortable.
It was that dim grey hour when things are just creeping out of darkness, when everything is
colourless and clear cut, and yet unreal. I got up, and went down into the great hall, and so
out upon the flagstones in front of the palace. I thought I would make a virtue of necessity,
and see the sunrise.
‘The moon was setting, and the dying moonlight and the first pallor of dawn were mingled
in a ghastly half-light. The bushes were inky black, the ground a sombre grey, the sky
colourless and cheerless. And up the hill I thought I could see ghosts. There several times, as
I scanned the slope, I saw white figures. Twice I fancied I saw a solitary white, ape-like
creature running rather quickly up the hill, and once near the ruins I saw a leash of them
carrying some dark body. They moved hastily. I did not see what became of them. It seemed
that they vanished among the bushes. The dawn was still indistinct, you must understand. I
was feeling that chill, uncertain, early-morning feeling you may have known. I doubted my
‘As the eastern sky grew brighter, and the light of the day came on and its vivid colouring
returned upon the world once more, I scanned the view keenly. But I saw no vestige of my
white figures. They were mere creatures of the half light. “They must have been ghosts,” I
said; “I wonder whence they dated.” For a queer notion of Grant Allen’s came into my head,
and amused me. If each generation die and leave ghosts, he argued, the world at last will get
overcrowded with them. On that theory they would have grown innumerable some Eight
Hundred Thousand Years hence, and it was no great wonder to see four at once. But the jest
was unsatisfying, and I was thinking of these figures all the morning, until Weena’s rescue
drove them out of my head. I associated them in some indefinite way with the white animal I
had startled in my first passionate search for the Time Machine. But Weena was a pleasant
substitute. Yet all the same, they were soon destined to take far deadlier possession of my
‘I think I have said how much hotter than our own was the weather of this Golden Age. I
cannot account for it. It may be that the sun was hotter, or the earth nearer the sun. It is
usual to assume that the sun will go on cooling steadily in the future. But people, unfamiliar
with such speculations as those of the younger Darwin, forget that the planets must ultimately
fall back one by one into the parent body. As these catastrophes occur, the sun will blaze with
renewed energy; and it may be that some inner planet had suffered this fate. Whatever the
reason, the fact remains that the sun was very much hotter than we know it.
‘Well, one very hot morning — my fourth, I think — as I was seeking shelter from the
heat and glare in a colossal ruin near the great house where I slept and fed, there happened
this strange thing: Clambering among these heaps of masonry, I found a narrow gallery,
whose end and side windows were blocked by fallen masses of stone. By contrast with the
brilliancy outside, it seemed at first impenetrably dark to me. I entered it groping, for the
change from light to blackness made spots of colour swim before me. Suddenly I halted
spellbound. A pair of eyes, luminous by reflection against the daylight without, was watching
me out of the darkness.
‘The old instinctive dread of wild beasts came upon me. I clenched my hands and
steadfastly looked into the glaring eyeballs. I was afraid to turn. Then the thought of the
absolute security in which humanity appeared to be living came to my mind. And then I
remembered that strange terror of the dark. Overcoming my fear to some extent, I advanced
a step and spoke. I will admit that my voice was harsh and ill-controlled. I put out my hand
and touched something soft. At once the eyes darted sideways, and something white ran past
me. I turned with my heart in my mouth, and saw a queer little ape-like figure, its head held
down in a peculiar manner, running across the sunlit space behind me. It blundered against a
block of granite, staggered aside, and in a moment was hidden in a black shadow beneathanother pile of ruined masonry.
‘My impression of it is, of course, imperfect; but I know it was a dull white, and had
strange large greyish-red eyes; also that there was flaxen hair on its head and down its back.
But, as I say, it went too fast for me to see distinctly. I cannot even say whether it ran on
allfours, or only with its forearms held very low. After an instant’s pause I followed it into the
second heap of ruins. I could not find it at first; but, after a time in the profound obscurity, I
came upon one of those round well-like openings of which I have told you, half closed by a
fallen pillar. A sudden thought came to me. Could this Thing have vanished down the shaft? I
lit a match, and, looking down, I saw a small, white, moving creature, with large bright eyes
which regarded me steadfastly as it retreated. It made me shudder. It was so like a human
spider! It was clambering down the wall, and now I saw for the first time a number of metal
foot and hand rests forming a kind of ladder down the shaft. Then the light burned my fingers
and fell out of my hand, going out as it dropped, and when I had lit another the little monster
had disappeared.
‘I do not know how long I sat peering down that well. It was not for some time that I could
succeed in persuading myself that the thing I had seen was human. But, gradually, the truth
dawned on me: that Man had not remained one species, but had differentiated into two
distinct animals: that my graceful children of the Upper-world were not the sole descendants
of our generation, but that this bleached, obscene, nocturnal Thing, which had flashed before
me, was also heir to all the ages.
‘I thought of the flickering pillars and of my theory of an underground ventilation. I began
to suspect their true import. And what, I wondered, was this Lemur doing in my scheme of a
perfectly balanced organization? How was it related to the indolent serenity of the beautiful
Upper-worlders? And what was hidden down there, at the foot of that shaft? I sat upon the
edge of the well telling myself that, at any rate, there was nothing to fear, and that there I
must descend for the solution of my difficulties. And withal I was absolutely afraid to go! As I
hesitated, two of the beautiful Upper-world people came running in their amorous sport across
the daylight in the shadow. The male pursued the female, flinging flowers at her as he ran.
‘They seemed distressed to find me, my arm against the overturned pillar, peering down
the well. Apparently it was considered bad form to remark these apertures; for when I pointed
to this one, and tried to frame a question about it in their tongue, they were still more visibly
distressed and turned away. But they were interested by my matches, and I struck some to
amuse them. I tried them again about the well, and again I failed. So presently I left them,
meaning to go back to Weena, and see what I could get from her. But my mind was already in
revolution; my guesses and impressions were slipping and sliding to a new adjustment. I had
now a clue to the import of these wells, to the ventilating towers, to the mystery of the ghosts;
to say nothing of a hint at the meaning of the bronze gates and the fate of the Time Machine!
And very vaguely there came a suggestion towards the solution of the economic problem that
had puzzled me.
‘Here was the new view. Plainly, this second species of Man was subterranean. There
were three circumstances in particular which made me think that its rare emergence above
ground was the outcome of a long-continued underground habit. In the first place, there was
the bleached look common in most animals that live largely in the dark — the white fish of the
Kentucky caves, for instance. Then, those large eyes, with that capacity for reflecting light,
are common features of nocturnal things — witness the owl and the cat. And last of all, that
evident confusion in the sunshine, that hasty yet fumbling awkward flight towards dark
shadow, and that peculiar carriage of the head while in the light — all reinforced the theory of
an extreme sensitiveness of the retina.
‘Beneath my feet, then, the earth must be tunnelled enormously, and these tunnellings
were the habitat of the new race. The presence of ventilating shafts and wells along the hill
slopes — everywhere, in fact except along the river valley — showed how universal were itsramifications. What so natural, then, as to assume that it was in this artificial Underworld that
such work as was necessary to the comfort of the daylight race was done? The notion was so
plausible that I at once accepted it, and went on to assume the how of this splitting of the
human species. I dare say you will anticipate the shape of my theory; though, for myself, I
very soon felt that it fell far short of the truth.
‘At first, proceeding from the problems of our own age, it seemed clear as daylight to me
that the gradual widening of the present merely temporary and social difference between the
Capitalist and the Labourer, was the key to the whole position. No doubt it will seem grotesque
enough to you — and wildly incredible! — and yet even now there are existing circumstances
to point that way. There is a tendency to utilize underground space for the less ornamental
purposes of civilization; there is the Metropolitan Railway in London, for instance, there are
new electric railways, there are subways, there are underground workrooms and restaurants,
and they increase and multiply. Evidently, I thought, this tendency had increased till Industry
had gradually lost its birthright in the sky. I mean that it had gone deeper and deeper into
larger and ever larger underground factories, spending a still-increasing amount of its time
therein, till, in the end —! Even now, does not an East-end worker live in such artificial
conditions as practically to be cut off from the natural surface of the earth?
‘Again, the exclusive tendency of richer people — due, no doubt, to the increasing
refinement of their education, and the widening gulf between them and the rude violence of
the poor — is already leading to the closing, in their interest, of considerable portions of the
surface of the land. About London, for instance, perhaps half the prettier country is shut in
against intrusion. And this same widening gulf — which is due to the length and expense of
the higher educational process and the increased facilities for and temptations towards refined
habits on the part of the rich — will make that exchange between class and class, that
promotion by intermarriage which at present retards the splitting of our species along lines of
social stratification, less and less frequent. So, in the end, above ground you must have the
Haves, pursuing pleasure and comfort and beauty, and below ground the Have-nots, the
Workers getting continually adapted to the conditions of their labour. Once they were there,
they would no doubt have to pay rent, and not a little of it, for the ventilation of their caverns;
and if they refused, they would starve or be suffocated for arrears. Such of them as were so
constituted as to be miserable and rebellious would die; and, in the end, the balance being
permanent, the survivors would become as well adapted to the conditions of underground life,
and as happy in their way, as the Upper-world people were to theirs. As it seemed to me, the
refined beauty and the etiolated pallor followed naturally enough.
‘The great triumph of Humanity I had dreamed of took a different shape in my mind. It
had been no such triumph of moral education and general co-operation as I had imagined.
Instead, I saw a real aristocracy, armed with a perfected science and working to a logical
conclusion the industrial system of to-day. Its triumph had not been simply a triumph over
Nature, but a triumph over Nature and the fellow-man. This, I must warn you, was my theory
at the time. I had no convenient cicerone in the pattern of the Utopian books. My explanation
may be absolutely wrong. I still think it is the most plausible one. But even on this supposition
the balanced civilization that was at last attained must have long since passed its zenith, and
was now far fallen into decay. The too-perfect security of the Upper-worlders had led them to
a slow movement of degeneration, to a general dwindling in size, strength, and intelligence.
That I could see clearly enough already. What had happened to the Under-grounders I did not
yet suspect; but from what I had seen of the Morlocks — that, by the by, was the name by
which these creatures were called — I could imagine that the modification of the human type
was even far more profound than among the “Eloi,” the beautiful race that I already knew.
‘Then came troublesome doubts. Why had the Morlocks taken my Time Machine? For I
felt sure it was they who had taken it. Why, too, if the Eloi were masters, could they not
restore the machine to me? And why were they so terribly afraid of the dark? I proceeded, asI have said, to question Weena about this Under-world, but here again I was disappointed. At
first she would not understand my questions, and presently she refused to answer them. She
shivered as though the topic was unendurable. And when I pressed her, perhaps a little
harshly, she burst into tears. They were the only tears, except my own, I ever saw in that
Golden Age. When I saw them I ceased abruptly to trouble about the Morlocks, and was only
concerned in banishing these signs of the human inheritance from Weena’s eyes. And very
soon she was smiling and clapping her hands, while I solemnly burned a match.
Chapter 6

‘It may seem odd to you, but it was two days before I could follow up the new-found clue
in what was manifestly the proper way. I felt a peculiar shrinking from those pallid bodies.
They were just the half-bleached colour of the worms and things one sees preserved in spirit
in a zoological museum. And they were filthily cold to the touch. Probably my shrinking was
largely due to the sympathetic influence of the Eloi, whose disgust of the Morlocks I now
began to appreciate.
‘The next night I did not sleep well. Probably my health was a little disordered. I was
oppressed with perplexity and doubt. Once or twice I had a feeling of intense fear for which I
could perceive no definite reason. I remember creeping noiselessly into the great hall where
the little people were sleeping in the moonlight — that night Weena was among them — and
feeling reassured by their presence. It occurred to me even then, that in the course of a few
days the moon must pass through its last quarter, and the nights grow dark, when the
appearances of these unpleasant creatures from below, these whitened Lemurs, this new
vermin that had replaced the old, might be more abundant. And on both these days I had the
restless feeling of one who shirks an inevitable duty. I felt assured that the Time Machine was
only to be recovered by boldly penetrating these underground mysteries. Yet I could not face
the mystery. If only I had had a companion it would have been different. But I was so horribly
alone, and even to clamber down into the darkness of the well appalled me. I don’t know if you
will understand my feeling, but I never felt quite safe at my back.
‘It was this restlessness, this insecurity, perhaps, that drove me further and further afield
in my exploring expeditions. Going to the south-westward towards the rising country that is
now called Combe Wood, I observed far off, in the direction of nineteenth-century Banstead, a
vast green structure, different in character from any I had hitherto seen. It was larger than the
largest of the palaces or ruins I knew, and the facade had an Oriental look: the face of it
having the lustre, as well as the pale-green tint, a kind of bluish-green, of a certain type of
Chinese porcelain. This difference in aspect suggested a difference in use, and I was minded
to push on and explore. But the day was growing late, and I had come upon the sight of the
place after a long and tiring circuit; so I resolved to hold over the adventure for the following
day, and I returned to the welcome and the caresses of little Weena. But next morning I
perceived clearly enough that my curiosity regarding the Palace of Green Porcelain was a
piece of self-deception, to enable me to shirk, by another day, an experience I dreaded. I
resolved I would make the descent without further waste of time, and started out in the early
morning towards a well near the ruins of granite and aluminium.
‘Little Weena ran with me. She danced beside me to the well, but when she saw me lean
over the mouth and look downward, she seemed strangely disconcerted. “Good-bye, Little
Weena,” I said, kissing her; and then putting her down, I began to feel over the parapet for
the climbing hooks. Rather hastily, I may as well confess, for I feared my courage might leak
away! At first she watched me in amazement. Then she gave a most piteous cry, and running
to me, she began to pull at me with her little hands. I think her opposition nerved me rather to
proceed. I shook her off, perhaps a little roughly, and in another moment I was in the throat of
the well. I saw her agonized face over the parapet, and smiled to reassure her. Then I had to
look down at the unstable hooks to which I clung.
‘I had to clamber down a shaft of perhaps two hundred yards. The descent was effected
by means of metallic bars projecting from the sides of the well, and these being adapted to
the needs of a creature much smaller and lighter than myself, I was speedily cramped and
fatigued by the descent. And not simply fatigued! One of the bars bent suddenly under myweight, and almost swung me off into the blackness beneath. For a moment I hung by one
hand, and after that experience I did not dare to rest again. Though my arms and back were
presently acutely painful, I went on clambering down the sheer descent with as quick a motion
as possible. Glancing upward, I saw the aperture, a small blue disk, in which a star was
visible, while little Weena’s head showed as a round black projection. The thudding sound of a
machine below grew louder and more oppressive. Everything save that little disk above was
profoundly dark, and when I looked up again Weena had disappeared.
‘I was in an agony of discomfort. I had some thought of trying to go up the shaft again,
and leave the Under-world alone. But even while I turned this over in my mind I continued to
descend. At last, with intense relief, I saw dimly coming up, a foot to the right of me, a slender
loophole in the wall. Swinging myself in, I found it was the aperture of a narrow horizontal
tunnel in which I could lie down and rest. It was not too soon. My arms ached, my back was
cramped, and I was trembling with the prolonged terror of a fall. Besides this, the unbroken
darkness had had a distressing effect upon my eyes. The air was full of the throb and hum of
machinery pumping air down the shaft.
‘I do not know how long I lay. I was roused by a soft hand touching my face. Starting up
in the darkness I snatched at my matches and, hastily striking one, I saw three stooping white
creatures similar to the one I had seen above ground in the ruin, hastily retreating before the
light. Living, as they did, in what appeared to me impenetrable darkness, their eyes were
abnormally large and sensitive, just as are the pupils of the abysmal fishes, and they reflected
the light in the same way. I have no doubt they could see me in that rayless obscurity, and
they did not seem to have any fear of me apart from the light. But, so soon as I struck a
match in order to see them, they fled incontinently, vanishing into dark gutters and tunnels,
from which their eyes glared at me in the strangest fashion.
‘I tried to call to them, but the language they had was apparently different from that of
the Over-world people; so that I was needs left to my own unaided efforts, and the thought of
flight before exploration was even then in my mind. But I said to myself, “You are in for it
now,” and, feeling my way along the tunnel, I found the noise of machinery grow louder.
Presently the walls fell away from me, and I came to a large open space, and striking another
match, saw that I had entered a vast arched cavern, which stretched into utter darkness
beyond the range of my light. The view I had of it was as much as one could see in the
burning of a match.
‘Necessarily my memory is vague. Great shapes like big machines rose out of the
dimness, and cast grotesque black shadows, in which dim spectral Morlocks sheltered from
the glare. The place, by the by, was very stuffy and oppressive, and the faint halitus of freshly
shed blood was in the air. Some way down the central vista was a little table of white metal,
laid with what seemed a meal. The Morlocks at any rate were carnivorous! Even at the time, I
remember wondering what large animal could have survived to furnish the red joint I saw. It
was all very indistinct: the heavy smell, the big unmeaning shapes, the obscene figures lurking
in the shadows, and only waiting for the darkness to come at me again! Then the match
burned down, and stung my fingers, and fell, a wriggling red spot in the blackness.
‘I have thought since how particularly ill-equipped I was for such an experience. When I
had started with the Time Machine, I had started with the absurd assumption that the men of
the Future would certainly be infinitely ahead of ourselves in all their appliances. I had come
without arms, without medicine, without anything to smoke — at times I missed tobacco
frightfully — even without enough matches. If only I had thought of a Kodak! I could have
flashed that glimpse of the Underworld in a second, and examined it at leisure. But, as it was,
I stood there with only the weapons and the powers that Nature had endowed me with —
hands, feet, and teeth; these, and four safety-matches that still remained to me.
‘I was afraid to push my way in among all this machinery in the dark, and it was only with
my last glimpse of light I discovered that my store of matches had run low. It had neveroccurred to me until that moment that there was any need to economize them, and I had
wasted almost half the box in astonishing the Upper-worlders, to whom fire was a novelty.
Now, as I say, I had four left, and while I stood in the dark, a hand touched mine, lank fingers
came feeling over my face, and I was sensible of a peculiar unpleasant odour. I fancied I
heard the breathing of a crowd of those dreadful little beings about me. I felt the box of
matches in my hand being gently disengaged, and other hands behind me plucking at my
clothing. The sense of these unseen creatures examining me was indescribably unpleasant.
The sudden realization of my ignorance of their ways of thinking and doing came home to me
very vividly in the darkness. I shouted at them as loudly as I could. They started away, and
then I could feel them approaching me again. They clutched at me more boldly, whispering
odd sounds to each other. I shivered violently, and shouted again rather discordantly. This
time they were not so seriously alarmed, and they made a queer laughing noise as they came
back at me. I will confess I was horribly frightened. I determined to strike another match and
escape under the protection of its glare. I did so, and eking out the flicker with a scrap of
paper from my pocket, I made good my retreat to the narrow tunnel. But I had scarce entered
this when my light was blown out and in the blackness I could hear the Morlocks rustling like
wind among leaves, and pattering like the rain, as they hurried after me.
‘In a moment I was clutched by several hands, and there was no mistaking that they
were trying to haul me back. I struck another light, and waved it in their dazzled faces. You
can scarce imagine how nauseatingly inhuman they looked — those pale, chinless faces and
great, lidless, pinkish-grey eyes! — as they stared in their blindness and bewilderment. But I
did not stay to look, I promise you: I retreated again, and when my second match had ended,
I struck my third. It had almost burned through when I reached the opening into the shaft. I
lay down on the edge, for the throb of the great pump below made me giddy. Then I felt
sideways for the projecting hooks, and, as I did so, my feet were grasped from behind, and I
was violently tugged backward. I lit my last match... and it incontinently went out. But I had my
hand on the climbing bars now, and, kicking violently, I disengaged myself from the clutches
of the Morlocks and was speedily clambering up the shaft, while they stayed peering and
blinking up at me: all but one little wretch who followed me for some way, and wellnigh
secured my boot as a trophy.
‘That climb seemed interminable to me. With the last twenty or thirty feet of it a deadly
nausea came upon me. I had the greatest difficulty in keeping my hold. The last few yards
was a frightful struggle against this faintness. Several times my head swam, and I felt all the
sensations of falling. At last, however, I got over the well-mouth somehow, and staggered out
of the ruin into the blinding sunlight. I fell upon my face. Even the soil smelt sweet and clean.
Then I remember Weena kissing my hands and ears, and the voices of others among the
Eloi. Then, for a time, I was insensible.
Chapter 7

‘Now, indeed, I seemed in a worse case than before. Hitherto, except during my night’s
anguish at the loss of the Time Machine, I had felt a sustaining hope of ultimate escape, but
that hope was staggered by these new discoveries. Hitherto I had merely thought myself
impeded by the childish simplicity of the little people, and by some unknown forces which I had
only to understand to overcome; but there was an altogether new element in the sickening
quality of the Morlocks — a something inhuman and malign. Instinctively I loathed them.
Before, I had felt as a man might feel who had fallen into a pit: my concern was with the pit
and how to get out of it. Now I felt like a beast in a trap, whose enemy would come upon him
‘The enemy I dreaded may surprise you. It was the darkness of the new moon. Weena
had put this into my head by some at first incomprehensible remarks about the Dark Nights. It
was not now such a very difficult problem to guess what the coming Dark Nights might mean.
The moon was on the wane: each night there was a longer interval of darkness. And I now
understood to some slight degree at least the reason of the fear of the little Upper-world
people for the dark. I wondered vaguely what foul villainy it might be that the Morlocks did
under the new moon. I felt pretty sure now that my second hypothesis was all wrong. The
Upper-world people might once have been the favoured aristocracy, and the Morlocks their
mechanical servants: but that had long since passed away. The two species that had resulted
from the evolution of man were sliding down towards, or had already arrived at, an altogether
new relationship. The Eloi, like the Carolingian kings, had decayed to a mere beautiful futility.
They still possessed the earth on sufferance: since the Morlocks, subterranean for
innumerable generations, had come at last to find the daylit surface intolerable. And the
Morlocks made their garments, I inferred, and maintained them in their habitual needs,
perhaps through the survival of an old habit of service. They did it as a standing horse paws
with his foot, or as a man enjoys killing animals in sport: because ancient and departed
necessities had impressed it on the organism. But, clearly, the old order was already in part
reversed. The Nemesis of the delicate ones was creeping on apace. Ages ago, thousands of
generations ago, man had thrust his brother man out of the ease and the sunshine. And now
that brother was coming back changed! Already the Eloi had begun to learn one old lesson
anew. They were becoming reacquainted with Fear. And suddenly there came into my head
the memory of the meat I had seen in the Under-world. It seemed odd how it floated into my
mind: not stirred up as it were by the current of my meditations, but coming in almost like a
question from outside. I tried to recall the form of it. I had a vague sense of something
familiar, but I could not tell what it was at the time.
‘Still, however helpless the little people in the presence of their mysterious Fear, I was
differently constituted. I came out of this age of ours, this ripe prime of the human race, when
Fear does not paralyse and mystery has lost its terrors. I at least would defend myself.
Without further delay I determined to make myself arms and a fastness where I might sleep.
With that refuge as a base, I could face this strange world with some of that confidence I had
lost in realizing to what creatures night by night I lay exposed. I felt I could never sleep again
until my bed was secure from them. I shuddered with horror to think how they must already
have examined me.
‘I wandered during the afternoon along the valley of the Thames, but found nothing that
commended itself to my mind as inaccessible. All the buildings and trees seemed easily
practicable to such dexterous climbers as the Morlocks, to judge by their wells, must be. Then
the tall pinnacles of the Palace of Green Porcelain and the polished gleam of its walls cameback to my memory; and in the evening, taking Weena like a child upon my shoulder, I went
up the hills towards the south-west. The distance, I had reckoned, was seven or eight miles,
but it must have been nearer eighteen. I had first seen the place on a moist afternoon when
distances are deceptively diminished. In addition, the heel of one of my shoes was loose, and
a nail was working through the sole — they were comfortable old shoes I wore about indoors
— so that I was lame. And it was already long past sunset when I came in sight of the palace,
silhouetted black against the pale yellow of the sky.
‘Weena had been hugely delighted when I began to carry her, but after a while she
desired me to let her down, and ran along by the side of me, occasionally darting off on either
hand to pick flowers to stick in my pockets. My pockets had always puzzled Weena, but at the
last she had concluded that they were an eccentric kind of vase for floral decoration. At least
she utilized them for that purpose. And that reminds me! In changing my jacket I found...’
The Time Traveller paused, put his hand into his pocket, and silently placed two withered
flowers, not unlike very large white mallows, upon the little table. Then he resumed his
‘As the hush of evening crept over the world and we proceeded over the hill crest
towards Wimbledon, Weena grew tired and wanted to return to the house of grey stone. But I
pointed out the distant pinnacles of the Palace of Green Porcelain to her, and contrived to
make her understand that we were seeking a refuge there from her Fear. You know that great
pause that comes upon things before the dusk? Even the breeze stops in the trees. To me
there is always an air of expectation about that evening stillness. The sky was clear, remote,
and empty save for a few horizontal bars far down in the sunset. Well, that night the
expectation took the colour of my fears. In that darkling calm my senses seemed
preternaturally sharpened. I fancied I could even feel the hollowness of the ground beneath
my feet: could, indeed, almost see through it the Morlocks on their ant-hill going hither and
thither and waiting for the dark. In my excitement I fancied that they would receive my
invasion of their burrows as a declaration of war. And why had they taken my Time Machine?
‘So we went on in the quiet, and the twilight deepened into night. The clear blue of the
distance faded, and one star after another came out. The ground grew dim and the trees
black. Weena’s fears and her fatigue grew upon her. I took her in my arms and talked to her
and caressed her. Then, as the darkness grew deeper, she put her arms round my neck, and,
closing her eyes, tightly pressed her face against my shoulder. So we went down a long slope
into a valley, and there in the dimness I almost walked into a little river. This I waded, and
went up the opposite side of the valley, past a number of sleeping houses, and by a statue —
a Faun, or some such figure, minus the head. Here too were acacias. So far I had seen
nothing of the Morlocks, but it was yet early in the night, and the darker hours before the old
moon rose were still to come.
‘From the brow of the next hill I saw a thick wood spreading wide and black before me. I
hesitated at this. I could see no end to it, either to the right or the left. Feeling tired — my feet,
in particular, were very sore — I carefully lowered Weena from my shoulder as I halted, and
sat down upon the turf. I could no longer see the Palace of Green Porcelain, and I was in
doubt of my direction. I looked into the thickness of the wood and thought of what it might
hide. Under that dense tangle of branches one would be out of sight of the stars. Even were
there no other lurking danger — a danger I did not care to let my imagination loose upon —
there would still be all the roots to stumble over and the tree-boles to strike against.
‘I was very tired, too, after the excitements of the day; so I decided that I would not face
it, but would pass the night upon the open hill.
‘Weena, I was glad to find, was fast asleep. I carefully wrapped her in my jacket, and sat
down beside her to wait for the moonrise. The hill-side was quiet and deserted, but from the
black of the wood there came now and then a stir of living things. Above me shone the stars,
for the night was very clear. I felt a certain sense of friendly comfort in their twinkling. All theold constellations had gone from the sky, however: that slow movement which is imperceptible
in a hundred human lifetimes, had long since rearranged them in unfamiliar groupings. But the
Milky Way, it seemed to me, was still the same tattered streamer of star-dust as of yore.
Southward (as I judged it) was a very bright red star that was new to me; it was even more
splendid than our own green Sirius. And amid all these scintillating points of light one bright
planet shone kindly and steadily like the face of an old friend.
‘Looking at these stars suddenly dwarfed my own troubles and all the gravities of
terrestrial life. I thought of their unfathomable distance, and the slow inevitable drift of their
movements out of the unknown past into the unknown future. I thought of the great
precessional cycle that the pole of the earth describes. Only forty times had that silent
revolution occurred during all the years that I had traversed. And during these few revolutions
all the activity, all the traditions, the complex organizations, the nations, languages, literatures,
aspirations, even the mere memory of Man as I knew him, had been swept out of existence.
Instead were these frail creatures who had forgotten their high ancestry, and the white Things
of which I went in terror. Then I thought of the Great Fear that was between the two species,
and for the first time, with a sudden shiver, came the clear knowledge of what the meat I had
seen might be. Yet it was too horrible! I looked at little Weena sleeping beside me, her face
white and starlike under the stars, and forthwith dismissed the thought.
‘Through that long night I held my mind off the Morlocks as well as I could, and whiled
away the time by trying to fancy I could find signs of the old constellations in the new
confusion. The sky kept very clear, except for a hazy cloud or so. No doubt I dozed at times.
Then, as my vigil wore on, came a faintness in the eastward sky, like the reflection of some
colourless fire, and the old moon rose, thin and peaked and white. And close behind, and
overtaking it, and overflowing it, the dawn came, pale at first, and then growing pink and
warm. No Morlocks had approached us. Indeed, I had seen none upon the hill that night. And
in the confidence of renewed day it almost seemed to me that my fear had been
unreasonable. I stood up and found my foot with the loose heel swollen at the ankle and
painful under the heel; so I sat down again, took off my shoes, and flung them away.
‘I awakened Weena, and we went down into the wood, now green and pleasant instead
of black and forbidding. We found some fruit wherewith to break our fast. We soon met others
of the dainty ones, laughing and dancing in the sunlight as though there was no such thing in
nature as the night. And then I thought once more of the meat that I had seen. I felt assured
now of what it was, and from the bottom of my heart I pitied this last feeble rill from the great
flood of humanity. Clearly, at some time in the Long-Ago of human decay the Morlocks’ food
had run short. Possibly they had lived on rats and such-like vermin. Even now man is far less
discriminating and exclusive in his food than he was — far less than any monkey. His
prejudice against human flesh is no deep-seated instinct. And so these inhuman sons of men
——! I tried to look at the thing in a scientific spirit. After all, they were less human and more
remote than our cannibal ancestors of three or four thousand years ago. And the intelligence
that would have made this state of things a torment had gone. Why should I trouble myself?
These Eloi were mere fatted cattle, which the ant-like Morlocks preserved and preyed upon —
probably saw to the breeding of. And there was Weena dancing at my side!
‘Then I tried to preserve myself from the horror that was coming upon me, by regarding it
as a rigorous punishment of human selfishness. Man had been content to live in ease and
delight upon the labours of his fellow-man, had taken Necessity as his watchword and excuse,
and in the fullness of time Necessity had come home to him. I even tried a Carlyle-like scorn
of this wretched aristocracy in decay. But this attitude of mind was impossible. However great
their intellectual degradation, the Eloi had kept too much of the human form not to claim my
sympathy, and to make me perforce a sharer in their degradation and their Fear.
‘I had at that time very vague ideas as to the course I should pursue. My first was to
secure some safe place of refuge, and to make myself such arms of metal or stone as I couldcontrive. That necessity was immediate. In the next place, I hoped to procure some means of
fire, so that I should have the weapon of a torch at hand, for nothing, I knew, would be more
efficient against these Morlocks. Then I wanted to arrange some contrivance to break open
the doors of bronze under the White Sphinx. I had in mind a battering ram. I had a persuasion
that if I could enter those doors and carry a blaze of light before me I should discover the
Time Machine and escape. I could not imagine the Morlocks were strong enough to move it
far away. Weena I had resolved to bring with me to our own time. And turning such schemes
over in my mind I pursued our way towards the building which my fancy had chosen as our
Chapter 8

‘I found the Palace of Green Porcelain, when we approached it about noon, deserted and
falling into ruin. Only ragged vestiges of glass remained in its windows, and great sheets of
the green facing had fallen away from the corroded metallic framework. It lay very high upon a
turfy down, and looking north-eastward before I entered it, I was surprised to see a large
estuary, or even creek, where I judged Wandsworth and Battersea must once have been. I
thought then — though I never followed up the thought — of what might have happened, or
might be happening, to the living things in the sea.
‘The material of the Palace proved on examination to be indeed porcelain, and along the
face of it I saw an inscription in some unknown character. I thought, rather foolishly, that
Weena might help me to interpret this, but I only learned that the bare idea of writing had
never entered her head. She always seemed to me, I fancy, more human than she was,
perhaps because her affection was so human.
‘Within the big valves of the door — which were open and broken — we found, instead of
the customary hall, a long gallery lit by many side windows. At the first glance I was reminded
of a museum. The tiled floor was thick with dust, and a remarkable array of miscellaneous
objects was shrouded in the same grey covering. Then I perceived, standing strange and
gaunt in the centre of the hall, what was clearly the lower part of a huge skeleton. I recognized
by the oblique feet that it was some extinct creature after the fashion of the Megatherium. The
skull and the upper bones lay beside it in the thick dust, and in one place, where rain-water
had dropped through a leak in the roof, the thing itself had been worn away. Further in the
gallery was the huge skeleton barrel of a Brontosaurus. My museum hypothesis was
confirmed. Going towards the side I found what appeared to be sloping shelves, and clearing
away the thick dust, I found the old familiar glass cases of our own time. But they must have
been air-tight to judge from the fair preservation of some of their contents.
‘Clearly we stood among the ruins of some latter-day South Kensington! Here,
apparently, was the Palaeontological Section, and a very splendid array of fossils it must have
been, though the inevitable process of decay that had been staved off for a time, and had,
through the extinction of bacteria and fungi, lost ninety-nine hundredths of its force, was
nevertheless, with extreme sureness if with extreme slowness at work again upon all its
treasures. Here and there I found traces of the little people in the shape of rare fossils broken
to pieces or threaded in strings upon reeds. And the cases had in some instances been bodily
removed — by the Morlocks as I judged. The place was very silent. The thick dust deadened
our footsteps. Weena, who had been rolling a sea urchin down the sloping glass of a case,
presently came, as I stared about me, and very quietly took my hand and stood beside me.
‘And at first I was so much surprised by this ancient monument of an intellectual age,
that I gave no thought to the possibilities it presented. Even my preoccupation about the Time
Machine receded a little from my mind.
‘To judge from the size of the place, this Palace of Green Porcelain had a great deal
more in it than a Gallery of Palaeontology; possibly historical galleries; it might be, even a
library! To me, at least in my present circumstances, these would be vastly more interesting
than this spectacle of oldtime geology in decay. Exploring, I found another short gallery
running transversely to the first. This appeared to be devoted to minerals, and the sight of a
block of sulphur set my mind running on gunpowder. But I could find no saltpeter; indeed, no
nitrates of any kind. Doubtless they had deliquesced ages ago. Yet the sulphur hung in my
mind, and set up a train of thinking. As for the rest of the contents of that gallery, though on
the whole they were the best preserved of all I saw, I had little interest. I am no specialist inmineralogy, and I went on down a very ruinous aisle running parallel to the first hall I had
entered. Apparently this section had been devoted to natural history, but everything had long
since passed out of recognition. A few shrivelled and blackened vestiges of what had once
been stuffed animals, desiccated mummies in jars that had once held spirit, a brown dust of
departed plants: that was all! I was sorry for that, because I should have been glad to trace
the patent readjustments by which the conquest of animated nature had been attained. Then
we came to a gallery of simply colossal proportions, but singularly ill-lit, the floor of it running
downward at a slight angle from the end at which I entered. At intervals white globes hung
from the ceiling — many of them cracked and smashed — which suggested that originally the
place had been artificially lit. Here I was more in my element, for rising on either side of me
were the huge bulks of big machines, all greatly corroded and many broken down, but some
still fairly complete. You know I have a certain weakness for mechanism, and I was inclined to
linger among these; the more so as for the most part they had the interest of puzzles, and I
could make only the vaguest guesses at what they were for. I fancied that if I could solve their
puzzles I should find myself in possession of powers that might be of use against the
‘Suddenly Weena came very close to my side. So suddenly that she startled me. Had it
not been for her I do not think I should have noticed that the floor of the gallery sloped at all.
[Footnote: It may be, of course, that the floor did not slope, but that the museum was built
into the side of a hill.-Ed.] The end I had come in at was quite above ground, and was lit by
rare slit-like windows. As you went down the length, the ground came up against these
windows, until at last there was a pit like the “area” of a London house before each, and only a
narrow line of daylight at the top. I went slowly along, puzzling about the machines, and had
been too intent upon them to notice the gradual diminution of the light, until Weena’s
increasing apprehensions drew my attention. Then I saw that the gallery ran down at last into
a thick darkness. I hesitated, and then, as I looked round me, I saw that the dust was less
abundant and its surface less even. Further away towards the dimness, it appeared to be
broken by a number of small narrow footprints. My sense of the immediate presence of the
Morlocks revived at that. I felt that I was wasting my time in the academic examination of
machinery. I called to mind that it was already far advanced in the afternoon, and that I had
still no weapon, no refuge, and no means of making a fire. And then down in the remote
blackness of the gallery I heard a peculiar pattering, and the same odd noises I had heard
down the well.
‘I took Weena’s hand. Then, struck with a sudden idea, I left her and turned to a machine
from which projected a lever not unlike those in a signal-box. Clambering upon the stand, and
grasping this lever in my hands, I put all my weight upon it sideways. Suddenly Weena,
deserted in the central aisle, began to whimper. I had judged the strength of the lever pretty
correctly, for it snapped after a minute’s strain, and I rejoined her with a mace in my hand
more than sufficient, I judged, for any Morlock skull I might encounter. And I longed very
much to kill a Morlock or so. Very inhuman, you may think, to want to go killing one’s own
descendants! But it was impossible, somehow, to feel any humanity in the things. Only my
disinclination to leave Weena, and a persuasion that if I began to slake my thirst for murder
my Time Machine might suffer, restrained me from going straight down the gallery and killing
the brutes I heard.
‘Well, mace in one hand and Weena in the other, I went out of that gallery and into
another and still larger one, which at the first glance reminded me of a military chapel hung
with tattered flags. The brown and charred rags that hung from the sides of it, I presently
recognized as the decaying vestiges of books. They had long since dropped to pieces, and
every semblance of print had left them. But here and there were warped boards and cracked
metallic clasps that told the tale well enough. Had I been a literary man I might, perhaps, have
moralized upon the futility of all ambition. But as it was, the thing that struck me with keenestforce was the enormous waste of labour to which this sombre wilderness of rotting paper
testified. At the time I will confess that I thought chiefly of the Philosophical Transactions and
my own seventeen papers upon physical optics.
‘Then, going up a broad staircase, we came to what may once have been a gallery of
technical chemistry. And here I had not a little hope of useful discoveries. Except at one end
where the roof had collapsed, this gallery was well preserved. I went eagerly to every
unbroken case. And at last, in one of the really air-tight cases, I found a box of matches. Very
eagerly I tried them. They were perfectly good. They were not even damp. I turned to Weena.
“Dance,” I cried to her in her own tongue. For now I had a weapon indeed against the horrible
creatures we feared. And so, in that derelict museum, upon the thick soft carpeting of dust, to
Weena’s huge delight, I solemnly performed a kind of composite dance, whistling The Land of
the Leal as cheerfully as I could. In part it was a modest cancan, in part a step dance, in part
a skirt-dance (so far as my tail-coat permitted), and in part original. For I am naturally
inventive, as you know.
‘Now, I still think that for this box of matches to have escaped the wear of time for
immemorial years was a most strange, as for me it was a most fortunate thing. Yet, oddly
enough, I found a far unlikelier substance, and that was camphor. I found it in a sealed jar,
that by chance, I suppose, had been really hermetically sealed. I fancied at first that it was
paraffin wax, and smashed the glass accordingly. But the odour of camphor was
unmistakable. In the universal decay this volatile substance had chanced to survive, perhaps
through many thousands of centuries. It reminded me of a sepia painting I had once seen
done from the ink of a fossil Belemnite that must have perished and become fossilized millions
of years ago. I was about to throw it away, but I remembered that it was inflammable and
burned with a good bright flame — was, in fact, an excellent candle — and I put it in my
pocket. I found no explosives, however, nor any means of breaking down the bronze doors.
As yet my iron crowbar was the most helpful thing I had chanced upon. Nevertheless I left
that gallery greatly elated.
‘I cannot tell you all the story of that long afternoon. It would require a great effort of
memory to recall my explorations in at all the proper order. I remember a long gallery of
rusting stands of arms, and how I hesitated between my crowbar and a hatchet or a sword. I
could not carry both, however, and my bar of iron promised best against the bronze gates.
There were numbers of guns, pistols, and rifles. The most were masses of rust, but many
were of some new metal, and still fairly sound. But any cartridges or powder there may once
have been had rotted into dust. One corner I saw was charred and shattered; perhaps, I
thought, by an explosion among the specimens. In another place was a vast array of idols —
Polynesian, Mexican, Grecian, Phoenician, every country on earth I should think. And here,
yielding to an irresistible impulse, I wrote my name upon the nose of a steatite monster from
South America that particularly took my fancy.
‘As the evening drew on, my interest waned. I went through gallery after gallery, dusty,
silent, often ruinous, the exhibits sometimes mere heaps of rust and lignite, sometimes
fresher. In one place I suddenly found myself near the model of a tin-mine, and then by the
merest accident I discovered, in an air-tight case, two dynamite cartridges! I shouted
“Eureka!” and smashed the case with joy. Then came a doubt. I hesitated. Then, selecting a
little side gallery, I made my essay. I never felt such a disappointment as I did in waiting five,
ten, fifteen minutes for an explosion that never came. Of course the things were dummies, as
I might have guessed from their presence. I really believe that had they not been so, I should
have rushed off incontinently and blown Sphinx, bronze doors, and (as it proved) my chances
of finding the Time Machine, all together into nonexistence.
‘It was after that, I think, that we came to a little open court within the palace. It was
turfed, and had three fruit-trees. So we rested and refreshed ourselves. Towards sunset I
began to consider our position. Night was creeping upon us, and my inaccessible hiding-placehad still to be found. But that troubled me very little now. I had in my possession a thing that
was, perhaps, the best of all defences against the Morlocks — I had matches! I had the
camphor in my pocket, too, if a blaze were needed. It seemed to me that the best thing we
could do would be to pass the night in the open, protected by a fire. In the morning there was
the getting of the Time Machine. Towards that, as yet, I had only my iron mace. But now, with
my growing knowledge, I felt very differently towards those bronze doors. Up to this, I had
refrained from forcing them, largely because of the mystery on the other side. They had never
impressed me as being very strong, and I hoped to find my bar of iron not altogether
inadequate for the work.
Chapter 9

‘We emerged from the palace while the sun was still in part above the horizon. I was
determined to reach the White Sphinx early the next morning, and ere the dusk I purposed
pushing through the woods that had stopped me on the previous journey. My plan was to go
as far as possible that night, and then, building a fire, to sleep in the protection of its glare.
Accordingly, as we went along I gathered any sticks or dried grass I saw, and presently had
my arms full of such litter. Thus loaded, our progress was slower than I had anticipated, and
besides Weena was tired. And I began to suffer from sleepiness too; so that it was full night
before we reached the wood. Upon the shrubby hill of its edge Weena would have stopped,
fearing the darkness before us; but a singular sense of impending calamity, that should indeed
have served me as a warning, drove me onward. I had been without sleep for a night and two
days, and I was feverish and irritable. I felt sleep coming upon me, and the Morlocks with it.
‘While we hesitated, among the black bushes behind us, and dim against their blackness,
I saw three crouching figures. There was scrub and long grass all about us, and I did not feel
safe from their insidious approach. The forest, I calculated, was rather less than a mile
across. If we could get through it to the bare hill-side, there, as it seemed to me, was an
altogether safer resting-place; I thought that with my matches and my camphor I could
contrive to keep my path illuminated through the woods. Yet it was evident that if I was to
flourish matches with my hands I should have to abandon my firewood; so, rather reluctantly,
I put it down. And then it came into my head that I would amaze our friends behind by lighting
it. I was to discover the atrocious folly of this proceeding, but it came to my mind as an
ingenious move for covering our retreat.
‘I don’t know if you have ever thought what a rare thing flame must be in the absence of
man and in a temperate climate. The sun’s heat is rarely strong enough to burn, even when it
is focused by dewdrops, as is sometimes the case in more tropical districts. Lightning may
blast and blacken, but it rarely gives rise to widespread fire. Decaying vegetation may
occasionally smoulder with the heat of its fermentation, but this rarely results in flame. In this
decadence, too, the art of fire-making had been forgotten on the earth. The red tongues that
went licking up my heap of wood were an altogether new and strange thing to Weena.
‘She wanted to run to it and play with it. I believe she would have cast herself into it had I
not restrained her. But I caught her up, and in spite of her struggles, plunged boldly before me
into the wood. For a little way the glare of my fire lit the path. Looking back presently, I could
see, through the crowded stems, that from my heap of sticks the blaze had spread to some
bushes adjacent, and a curved line of fire was creeping up the grass of the hill. I laughed at
that, and turned again to the dark trees before me. It was very black, and Weena clung to me
convulsively, but there was still, as my eyes grew accustomed to the darkness, sufficient light
for me to avoid the stems. Overhead it was simply black, except where a gap of remote blue
sky shone down upon us here and there. I struck none of my matches because I had no hand
free. Upon my left arm I carried my little one, in my right hand I had my iron bar.
‘For some way I heard nothing but the crackling twigs under my feet, the faint rustle of
the breeze above, and my own breathing and the throb of the blood-vessels in my ears. Then
I seemed to know of a pattering about me. I pushed on grimly. The pattering grew more
distinct, and then I caught the same queer sound and voices I had heard in the Under-world.
There were evidently several of the Morlocks, and they were closing in upon me. Indeed, in
another minute I felt a tug at my coat, then something at my arm. And Weena shivered
violently, and became quite still.
‘It was time for a match. But to get one I must put her down. I did so, and, as I fumbledwith my pocket, a struggle began in the darkness about my knees, perfectly silent on her part
and with the same peculiar cooing sounds from the Morlocks. Soft little hands, too, were
creeping over my coat and back, touching even my neck. Then the match scratched and
fizzed. I held it flaring, and saw the white backs of the Morlocks in flight amid the trees. I
hastily took a lump of camphor from my pocket, and prepared to light is as soon as the match
should wane. Then I looked at Weena. She was lying clutching my feet and quite motionless,
with her face to the ground. With a sudden fright I stooped to her. She seemed scarcely to
breathe. I lit the block of camphor and flung it to the ground, and as it split and flared up and
drove back the Morlocks and the shadows, I knelt down and lifted her. The wood behind
seemed full of the stir and murmur of a great company!
‘She seemed to have fainted. I put her carefully upon my shoulder and rose to push on,
and then there came a horrible realization. In manoeuvring with my matches and Weena, I
had turned myself about several times, and now I had not the faintest idea in what direction
lay my path. For all I knew, I might be facing back towards the Palace of Green Porcelain. I
found myself in a cold sweat. I had to think rapidly what to do. I determined to build a fire and
encamp where we were. I put Weena, still motionless, down upon a turfy bole, and very
hastily, as my first lump of camphor waned, I began collecting sticks and leaves. Here and
there out of the darkness round me the Morlocks’ eyes shone like carbuncles.
‘The camphor flickered and went out. I lit a match, and as I did so, two white forms that
had been approaching Weena dashed hastily away. One was so blinded by the light that he
came straight for me, and I felt his bones grind under the blow of my fist. He gave a whoop of
dismay, staggered a little way, and fell down. I lit another piece of camphor, and went on
gathering my bonfire. Presently I noticed how dry was some of the foliage above me, for since
my arrival on the Time Machine, a matter of a week, no rain had fallen. So, instead of casting
about among the trees for fallen twigs, I began leaping up and dragging down branches. Very
soon I had a choking smoky fire of green wood and dry sticks, and could economize my
camphor. Then I turned to where Weena lay beside my iron mace. I tried what I could to
revive her, but she lay like one dead. I could not even satisfy myself whether or not she
‘Now, the smoke of the fire beat over towards me, and it must have made me heavy of a
sudden. Moreover, the vapour of camphor was in the air. My fire would not need replenishing
for an hour or so. I felt very weary after my exertion, and sat down. The wood, too, was full of
a slumbrous murmur that I did not understand. I seemed just to nod and open my eyes. But
all was dark, and the Morlocks had their hands upon me. Flinging off their clinging fingers I
hastily felt in my pocket for the match-box, and — it had gone! Then they gripped and closed
with me again. In a moment I knew what had happened. I had slept, and my fire had gone
out, and the bitterness of death came over my soul. The forest seemed full of the smell of
burning wood. I was caught by the neck, by the hair, by the arms, and pulled down. It was
indescribably horrible in the darkness to feel all these soft creatures heaped upon me. I felt as
if I was in a monstrous spider’s web. I was overpowered, and went down. I felt little teeth
nipping at my neck. I rolled over, and as I did so my hand came against my iron lever. It gave
me strength. I struggled up, shaking the human rats from me, and, holding the bar short, I
thrust where I judged their faces might be. I could feel the succulent giving of flesh and bone
under my blows, and for a moment I was free.
‘The strange exultation that so often seems to accompany hard fighting came upon me. I
knew that both I and Weena were lost, but I determined to make the Morlocks pay for their
meat. I stood with my back to a tree, swinging the iron bar before me. The whole wood was
full of the stir and cries of them. A minute passed. Their voices seemed to rise to a higher
pitch of excitement, and their movements grew faster. Yet none came within reach. I stood
glaring at the blackness. Then suddenly came hope. What if the Morlocks were afraid? And
close on the heels of that came a strange thing. The darkness seemed to grow luminous.Very dimly I began to see the Morlocks about me — three battered at my feet — and then I
recognized, with incredulous surprise, that the others were running, in an incessant stream, as
it seemed, from behind me, and away through the wood in front. And their backs seemed no
longer white, but reddish. As I stood agape, I saw a little red spark go drifting across a gap of
starlight between the branches, and vanish. And at that I understood the smell of burning
wood, the slumbrous murmur that was growing now into a gusty roar, the red glow, and the
Morlocks’ flight.
‘Stepping out from behind my tree and looking back, I saw, through the black pillars of
the nearer trees, the flames of the burning forest. It was my first fire coming after me. With
that I looked for Weena, but she was gone. The hissing and crackling behind me, the
explosive thud as each fresh tree burst into flame, left little time for reflection. My iron bar still
gripped, I followed in the Morlocks’ path. It was a close race. Once the flames crept forward
so swiftly on my right as I ran that I was outflanked and had to strike off to the left. But at last
I emerged upon a small open space, and as I did so, a Morlock came blundering towards me,
and past me, and went on straight into the fire!
‘And now I was to see the most weird and horrible thing, I think, of all that I beheld in that
future age. This whole space was as bright as day with the reflection of the fire. In the centre
was a hillock or tumulus, surmounted by a scorched hawthorn. Beyond this was another arm
of the burning forest, with yellow tongues already writhing from it, completely encircling the
space with a fence of fire. Upon the hill-side were some thirty or forty Morlocks, dazzled by
the light and heat, and blundering hither and thither against each other in their bewilderment.
At first I did not realize their blindness, and struck furiously at them with my bar, in a frenzy of
fear, as they approached me, killing one and crippling several more. But when I had watched
the gestures of one of them groping under the hawthorn against the red sky, and heard their
moans, I was assured of their absolute helplessness and misery in the glare, and I struck no
more of them.
‘Yet every now and then one would come straight towards me, setting loose a quivering
horror that made me quick to elude him. At one time the flames died down somewhat, and I
feared the foul creatures would presently be able to see me. I was thinking of beginning the
fight by killing some of them before this should happen; but the fire burst out again brightly,
and I stayed my hand. I walked about the hill among them and avoided them, looking for
some trace of Weena. But Weena was gone.
‘At last I sat down on the summit of the hillock, and watched this strange incredible
company of blind things groping to and fro, and making uncanny noises to each other, as the
glare of the fire beat on them. The coiling uprush of smoke streamed across the sky, and
through the rare tatters of that red canopy, remote as though they belonged to another
universe, shone the little stars. Two or three Morlocks came blundering into me, and I drove
them off with blows of my fists, trembling as I did so.
‘For the most part of that night I was persuaded it was a nightmare. I bit myself and
screamed in a passionate desire to awake. I beat the ground with my hands, and got up and
sat down again, and wandered here and there, and again sat down. Then I would fall to
rubbing my eyes and calling upon God to let me awake. Thrice I saw Morlocks put their heads
down in a kind of agony and rush into the flames. But, at last, above the subsiding red of the
fire, above the streaming masses of black smoke and the whitening and blackening tree
stumps, and the diminishing numbers of these dim creatures, came the white light of the day.
‘I searched again for traces of Weena, but there were none. It was plain that they had
left her poor little body in the forest. I cannot describe how it relieved me to think that it had
escaped the awful fate to which it seemed destined. As I thought of that, I was almost moved
to begin a massacre of the helpless abominations about me, but I contained myself. The
hillock, as I have said, was a kind of island in the forest. From its summit I could now make
out through a haze of smoke the Palace of Green Porcelain, and from that I could get mybearings for the White Sphinx. And so, leaving the remnant of these damned souls still going
hither and thither and moaning, as the day grew clearer, I tied some grass about my feet and
limped on across smoking ashes and among black stems, that still pulsated internally with fire,
towards the hiding-place of the Time Machine. I walked slowly, for I was almost exhausted, as
well as lame, and I felt the intensest wretchedness for the horrible death of little Weena. It
seemed an overwhelming calamity. Now, in this old familiar room, it is more like the sorrow of
a dream than an actual loss. But that morning it left me absolutely lonely again — terribly
alone. I began to think of this house of mine, of this fireside, of some of you, and with such
thoughts came a longing that was pain.
‘But as I walked over the smoking ashes under the bright morning sky, I made a
discovery. In my trouser pocket were still some loose matches. The box must have leaked
before it was lost.
Chapter 10

‘About eight or nine in the morning I came to the same seat of yellow metal from which I
had viewed the world upon the evening of my arrival. I thought of my hasty conclusions upon
that evening and could not refrain from laughing bitterly at my confidence. Here was the same
beautiful scene, the same abundant foliage, the same splendid palaces and magnificent ruins,
the same silver river running between its fertile banks. The gay robes of the beautiful people
moved hither and thither among the trees. Some were bathing in exactly the place where I
had saved Weena, and that suddenly gave me a keen stab of pain. And like blots upon the
landscape rose the cupolas above the ways to the Under-world. I understood now what all the
beauty of the Over-world people covered. Very pleasant was their day, as pleasant as the day
of the cattle in the field. Like the cattle, they knew of no enemies and provided against no
needs. And their end was the same.
‘I grieved to think how brief the dream of the human intellect had been. It had committed
suicide. It had set itself steadfastly towards comfort and ease, a balanced society with security
and permanency as its watchword, it had attained its hopes — to come to this at last. Once,
life and property must have reached almost absolute safety. The rich had been assured of his
wealth and comfort, the toiler assured of his life and work. No doubt in that perfect world there
had been no unemployed problem, no social question left unsolved. And a great quiet had
‘It is a law of nature we overlook, that intellectual versatility is the compensation for
change, danger, and trouble. An animal perfectly in harmony with its environment is a perfect
mechanism. Nature never appeals to intelligence until habit and instinct are useless. There is
no intelligence where there is no change and no need of change. Only those animals partake
of intelligence that have to meet a huge variety of needs and dangers.
‘So, as I see it, the Upper-world man had drifted towards his feeble prettiness, and the
Under-world to mere mechanical industry. But that perfect state had lacked one thing even for
mechanical perfection — absolute permanency. Apparently as time went on, the feeding of
the Under-world, however it was effected, had become disjointed. Mother Necessity, who had
been staved off for a few thousand years, came back again, and she began below. The
Under-world being in contact with machinery, which, however perfect, still needs some little
thought outside habit, had probably retained perforce rather more initiative, if less of every
other human character, than the Upper. And when other meat failed them, they turned to
what old habit had hitherto forbidden. So I say I saw it in my last view of the world of Eight
Hundred and Two Thousand Seven Hundred and One. It may be as wrong an explanation as
mortal wit could invent. It is how the thing shaped itself to me, and as that I give it to you.
‘After the fatigues, excitements, and terrors of the past days, and in spite of my grief,
this seat and the tranquil view and the warm sunlight were very pleasant. I was very tired and
sleepy, and soon my theorizing passed into dozing. Catching myself at that, I took my own
hint, and spreading myself out upon the turf I had a long and refreshing sleep.
‘I awoke a little before sunsetting. I now felt safe against being caught napping by the
Morlocks, and, stretching myself, I came on down the hill towards the White Sphinx. I had my
crowbar in one hand, and the other hand played with the matches in my pocket.
‘And now came a most unexpected thing. As I approached the pedestal of the sphinx I
found the bronze valves were open. They had slid down into grooves.
‘At that I stopped short before them, hesitating to enter.
‘Within was a small apartment, and on a raised place in the corner of this was the Time
Machine. I had the small levers in my pocket. So here, after all my elaborate preparations forthe siege of the White Sphinx, was a meek surrender. I threw my iron bar away, almost sorry
not to use it.
‘A sudden thought came into my head as I stooped towards the portal. For once, at
least, I grasped the mental operations of the Morlocks. Suppressing a strong inclination to
laugh, I stepped through the bronze frame and up to the Time Machine. I was surprised to
find it had been carefully oiled and cleaned. I have suspected since that the Morlocks had
even partially taken it to pieces while trying in their dim way to grasp its purpose.
‘Now as I stood and examined it, finding a pleasure in the mere touch of the contrivance,
the thing I had expected happened. The bronze panels suddenly slid up and struck the frame
with a clang. I was in the dark — trapped. So the Morlocks thought. At that I chuckled
‘I could already hear their murmuring laughter as they came towards me. Very calmly I
tried to strike the match. I had only to fix on the levers and depart then like a ghost. But I had
overlooked one little thing. The matches were of that abominable kind that light only on the
‘You may imagine how all my calm vanished. The little brutes were close upon me. One
touched me. I made a sweeping blow in the dark at them with the levers, and began to
scramble into the saddle of the machine. Then came one hand upon me and then another.
Then I had simply to fight against their persistent fingers for my levers, and at the same time
feel for the studs over which these fitted. One, indeed, they almost got away from me. As it
slipped from my hand, I had to butt in the dark with my head — I could hear the Morlock’s
skull ring — to recover it. It was a nearer thing than the fight in the forest, I think, this last
‘But at last the lever was fitted and pulled over. The clinging hands slipped from me. The
darkness presently fell from my eyes. I found myself in the same grey light and tumult I have
already described.
Chapter 11

‘I have already told you of the sickness and confusion that comes with time travelling.
And this time I was not seated properly in the saddle, but sideways and in an unstable
fashion. For an indefinite time I clung to the machine as it swayed and vibrated, quite
unheeding how I went, and when I brought myself to look at the dials again I was amazed to
find where I had arrived. One dial records days, and another thousands of days, another
millions of days, and another thousands of millions. Now, instead of reversing the levers, I had
pulled them over so as to go forward with them, and when I came to look at these indicators I
found that the thousands hand was sweeping round as fast as the seconds hand of a watch
— into futurity.
‘As I drove on, a peculiar change crept over the appearance of things. The palpitating
greyness grew darker; then — though I was still travelling with prodigious velocity — the
blinking succession of day and night, which was usually indicative of a slower pace, returned,
and grew more and more marked. This puzzled me very much at first. The alternations of
night and day grew slower and slower, and so did the passage of the sun across the sky, until
they seemed to stretch through centuries. At last a steady twilight brooded over the earth, a
twilight only broken now and then when a comet glared across the darkling sky. The band of
light that had indicated the sun had long since disappeared; for the sun had ceased to set — it
simply rose and fell in the west, and grew ever broader and more red. All trace of the moon
had vanished. The circling of the stars, growing slower and slower, had given place to
creeping points of light. At last, some time before I stopped, the sun, red and very large,
halted motionless upon the horizon, a vast dome glowing with a dull heat, and now and then
suffering a momentary extinction. At one time it had for a little while glowed more brilliantly
again, but it speedily reverted to its sullen red heat. I perceived by this slowing down of its
rising and setting that the work of the tidal drag was done. The earth had come to rest with
one face to the sun, even as in our own time the moon faces the earth. Very cautiously, for I
remembered my former headlong fall, I began to reverse my motion. Slower and slower went
the circling hands until the thousands one seemed motionless and the daily one was no longer
a mere mist upon its scale. Still slower, until the dim outlines of a desolate beach grew visible.
‘I stopped very gently and sat upon the Time Machine, looking round. The sky was no
longer blue. North-eastward it was inky black, and out of the blackness shone brightly and
steadily the pale white stars. Overhead it was a deep Indian red and starless, and
southeastward it grew brighter to a glowing scarlet where, cut by the horizon, lay the huge hull of
the sun, red and motionless. The rocks about me were of a harsh reddish colour, and all the
trace of life that I could see at first was the intensely green vegetation that covered every
projecting point on their south-eastern face. It was the same rich green that one sees on
forest moss or on the lichen in caves: plants which like these grow in a perpetual twilight.
‘The machine was standing on a sloping beach. The sea stretched away to the
southwest, to rise into a sharp bright horizon against the wan sky. There were no breakers and no
waves, for not a breath of wind was stirring. Only a slight oily swell rose and fell like a gentle
breathing, and showed that the eternal sea was still moving and living. And along the margin
where the water sometimes broke was a thick incrustation of salt — pink under the lurid sky.
There was a sense of oppression in my head, and I noticed that I was breathing very fast. The
sensation reminded me of my only experience of mountaineering, and from that I judged the
air to be more rarefied than it is now.
‘Far away up the desolate slope I heard a harsh scream, and saw a thing like a huge
white butterfly go slanting and flittering up into the sky and, circling, disappear over some lowhillocks beyond. The sound of its voice was so dismal that I shivered and seated myself more
firmly upon the machine. Looking round me again, I saw that, quite near, what I had taken to
be a reddish mass of rock was moving slowly towards me. Then I saw the thing was really a
monstrous crab-like creature. Can you imagine a crab as large as yonder table, with its many
legs moving slowly and uncertainly, its big claws swaying, its long antennae, like carters’
whips, waving and feeling, and its stalked eyes gleaming at you on either side of its metallic
front? Its back was corrugated and ornamented with ungainly bosses, and a greenish
incrustation blotched it here and there. I could see the many palps of its complicated mouth
flickering and feeling as it moved.
‘As I stared at this sinister apparition crawling towards me, I felt a tickling on my cheek as
though a fly had lighted there. I tried to brush it away with my hand, but in a moment it
returned, and almost immediately came another by my ear. I struck at this, and caught
something threadlike. It was drawn swiftly out of my hand. With a frightful qualm, I turned, and
I saw that I had grasped the antenna of another monster crab that stood just behind me. Its
evil eyes were wriggling on their stalks, its mouth was all alive with appetite, and its vast
ungainly claws, smeared with an algal slime, were descending upon me. In a moment my
hand was on the lever, and I had placed a month between myself and these monsters. But I
was still on the same beach, and I saw them distinctly now as soon as I stopped. Dozens of
them seemed to be crawling here and there, in the sombre light, among the foliated sheets of
intense green.
‘I cannot convey the sense of abominable desolation that hung over the world. The red
eastern sky, the northward blackness, the salt Dead Sea, the stony beach crawling with these
foul, slow-stirring monsters, the uniform poisonous-looking green of the lichenous plants, the
thin air that hurts one’s lungs: all contributed to an appalling effect. I moved on a hundred
years, and there was the same red sun — a little larger, a little duller — the same dying sea,
the same chill air, and the same crowd of earthy crustacea creeping in and out among the
green weed and the red rocks. And in the westward sky, I saw a curved pale line like a vast
new moon.
‘So I travelled, stopping ever and again, in great strides of a thousand years or more,
drawn on by the mystery of the earth’s fate, watching with a strange fascination the sun grow
larger and duller in the westward sky, and the life of the old earth ebb away. At last, more
than thirty million years hence, the huge red-hot dome of the sun had come to obscure nearly
a tenth part of the darkling heavens. Then I stopped once more, for the crawling multitude of
crabs had disappeared, and the red beach, save for its livid green liverworts and lichens,
seemed lifeless. And now it was flecked with white. A bitter cold assailed me. Rare white
flakes ever and again came eddying down. To the north-eastward, the glare of snow lay under
the starlight of the sable sky and I could see an undulating crest of hillocks pinkish white.
There were fringes of ice along the sea margin, with drifting masses further out; but the main
expanse of that salt ocean, all bloody under the eternal sunset, was still unfrozen.
‘I looked about me to see if any traces of animal life remained. A certain indefinable
apprehension still kept me in the saddle of the machine. But I saw nothing moving, in earth or
sky or sea. The green slime on the rocks alone testified that life was not extinct. A shallow
sandbank had appeared in the sea and the water had receded from the beach. I fancied I saw
some black object flopping about upon this bank, but it became motionless as I looked at it,
and I judged that my eye had been deceived, and that the black object was merely a rock.
The stars in the sky were intensely bright and seemed to me to twinkle very little.
‘Suddenly I noticed that the circular westward outline of the sun had changed; that a
concavity, a bay, had appeared in the curve. I saw this grow larger. For a minute perhaps I
stared aghast at this blackness that was creeping over the day, and then I realized that an
eclipse was beginning. Either the moon or the planet Mercury was passing across the sun’s
disk. Naturally, at first I took it to be the moon, but there is much to incline me to believe thatwhat I really saw was the transit of an inner planet passing very near to the earth.
‘The darkness grew apace; a cold wind began to blow in freshening gusts from the east,
and the showering white flakes in the air increased in number. From the edge of the sea came
a ripple and whisper. Beyond these lifeless sounds the world was silent. Silent? It would be
hard to convey the stillness of it. All the sounds of man, the bleating of sheep, the cries of
birds, the hum of insects, the stir that makes the background of our lives — all that was over.
As the darkness thickened, the eddying flakes grew more abundant, dancing before my eyes;
and the cold of the air more intense. At last, one by one, swiftly, one after the other, the white
peaks of the distant hills vanished into blackness. The breeze rose to a moaning wind. I saw
the black central shadow of the eclipse sweeping towards me. In another moment the pale
stars alone were visible. All else was rayless obscurity. The sky was absolutely black.
‘A horror of this great darkness came on me. The cold, that smote to my marrow, and
the pain I felt in breathing, overcame me. I shivered, and a deadly nausea seized me. Then
like a red-hot bow in the sky appeared the edge of the sun. I got off the machine to recover
myself. I felt giddy and incapable of facing the return journey. As I stood sick and confused I
saw again the moving thing upon the shoal — there was no mistake now that it was a moving
thing — against the red water of the sea. It was a round thing, the size of a football perhaps,
or, it may be, bigger, and tentacles trailed down from it; it seemed black against the weltering
blood-red water, and it was hopping fitfully about. Then I felt I was fainting. But a terrible
dread of lying helpless in that remote and awful twilight sustained me while I clambered upon
the saddle.
Chapter 12

‘So I came back. For a long time I must have been insensible upon the machine. The
blinking succession of the days and nights was resumed, the sun got golden again, the sky
blue. I breathed with greater freedom. The fluctuating contours of the land ebbed and flowed.
The hands spun backward upon the dials. At last I saw again the dim shadows of houses, the
evidences of decadent humanity. These, too, changed and passed, and others came.
Presently, when the million dial was at zero, I slackened speed. I began to recognize our own
petty and familiar architecture, the thousands hand ran back to the starting-point, the night
and day flapped slower and slower. Then the old walls of the laboratory came round me. Very
gently, now, I slowed the mechanism down.
‘I saw one little thing that seemed odd to me. I think I have told you that when I set out,
before my velocity became very high, Mrs. Watchett had walked across the room, travelling,
as it seemed to me, like a rocket. As I returned, I passed again across that minute when she
traversed the laboratory. But now her every motion appeared to be the exact inversion of her
previous ones. The door at the lower end opened, and she glided quietly up the laboratory,
back foremost, and disappeared behind the door by which she had previously entered. Just
before that I seemed to see Hillyer for a moment; but he passed like a flash.
‘Then I stopped the machine, and saw about me again the old familiar laboratory, my
tools, my appliances just as I had left them. I got off the thing very shaky, and sat down upon
my bench. For several minutes I trembled violently. Then I became calmer. Around me was
my old workshop again, exactly as it had been. I might have slept there, and the whole thing
have been a dream.
‘And yet, not exactly! The thing had started from the south-east corner of the laboratory.
It had come to rest again in the north-west, against the wall where you saw it. That gives you
the exact distance from my little lawn to the pedestal of the White Sphinx, into which the
Morlocks had carried my machine.
‘For a time my brain went stagnant. Presently I got up and came through the passage
here, limping, because my heel was still painful, and feeling sorely begrimed. I saw the Pall
Mall Gazette on the table by the door. I found the date was indeed to-day, and looking at the
timepiece, saw the hour was almost eight o’clock. I heard your voices and the clatter of plates.
I hesitated — I felt so sick and weak. Then I sniffed good wholesome meat, and opened the
door on you. You know the rest. I washed, and dined, and now I am telling you the story.
‘I know,’ he said, after a pause, ‘that all this will be absolutely incredible to you. To me
the one incredible thing is that I am here to-night in this old familiar room looking into your
friendly faces and telling you these strange adventures.’
He looked at the Medical Man. ‘No. I cannot expect you to believe it. Take it as a lie — or
a prophecy. Say I dreamed it in the workshop. Consider I have been speculating upon the
destinies of our race until I have hatched this fiction. Treat my assertion of its truth as a mere
stroke of art to enhance its interest. And taking it as a story, what do you think of it?’
He took up his pipe, and began, in his old accustomed manner, to tap with it nervously
upon the bars of the grate. There was a momentary stillness. Then chairs began to creak and
shoes to scrape upon the carpet. I took my eyes off the Time Traveller’s face, and looked
round at his audience. They were in the dark, and little spots of colour swam before them. The
Medical Man seemed absorbed in the contemplation of our host. The Editor was looking hard
at the end of his cigar — the sixth. The Journalist fumbled for his watch. The others, as far as
I remember, were motionless.
The Editor stood up with a sigh. ‘What a pity it is you’re not a writer of stories!’ he said,putting his hand on the Time Traveller’s shoulder.
‘You don’t believe it?’
‘Well ——’
‘I thought not.’
The Time Traveller turned to us. ‘Where are the matches?’ he said. He lit one and spoke
over his pipe, puffing. ‘To tell you the truth... I hardly believe it myself... And yet...’
His eye fell with a mute inquiry upon the withered white flowers upon the little table. Then
he turned over the hand holding his pipe, and I saw he was looking at some half-healed scars
on his knuckles.
The Medical Man rose, came to the lamp, and examined the flowers. ‘The gynaeceum’s
odd,’ he said. The Psychologist leant forward to see, holding out his hand for a specimen.
‘I’m hanged if it isn’t a quarter to one,’ said the Journalist. ‘How shall we get home?’
‘Plenty of cabs at the station,’ said the Psychologist.
‘It’s a curious thing,’ said the Medical Man; ‘but I certainly don’t know the natural order of
these flowers. May I have them?’
The Time Traveller hesitated. Then suddenly: ‘Certainly not.’
‘Where did you really get them?’ said the Medical Man.
The Time Traveller put his hand to his head. He spoke like one who was trying to keep
hold of an idea that eluded him. ‘They were put into my pocket by Weena, when I travelled
into Time.’ He stared round the room. ‘I’m damned if it isn’t all going. This room and you and
the atmosphere of every day is too much for my memory. Did I ever make a Time Machine,
or a model of a Time Machine? Or is it all only a dream? They say life is a dream, a precious
poor dream at times — but I can’t stand another that won’t fit. It’s madness. And where did
the dream come from?... I must look at that machine. If there is one!’
He caught up the lamp swiftly, and carried it, flaring red, through the door into the
corridor. We followed him. There in the flickering light of the lamp was the machine sure
enough, squat, ugly, and askew; a thing of brass, ebony, ivory, and translucent glimmering
quartz. Solid to the touch — for I put out my hand and felt the rail of it — and with brown
spots and smears upon the ivory, and bits of grass and moss upon the lower parts, and one
rail bent awry.
The Time Traveller put the lamp down on the bench, and ran his hand along the
damaged rail. ‘It’s all right now,’ he said. ‘The story I told you was true. I’m sorry to have
brought you out here in the cold.’ He took up the lamp, and, in an absolute silence, we
returned to the smoking-room.
He came into the hall with us and helped the Editor on with his coat. The Medical Man
looked into his face and, with a certain hesitation, told him he was suffering from overwork, at
which he laughed hugely. I remember him standing in the open doorway, bawling good night.
I shared a cab with the Editor. He thought the tale a ‘gaudy lie.’ For my own part I was
unable to come to a conclusion. The story was so fantastic and incredible, the telling so
credible and sober. I lay awake most of the night thinking about it. I determined to go next day
and see the Time Traveller again. I was told he was in the laboratory, and being on easy
terms in the house, I went up to him. The laboratory, however, was empty. I stared for a
minute at the Time Machine and put out my hand and touched the lever. At that the squat
substantial-looking mass swayed like a bough shaken by the wind. Its instability startled me
extremely, and I had a queer reminiscence of the childish days when I used to be forbidden to
meddle. I came back through the corridor. The Time Traveller met me in the smoking-room.
He was coming from the house. He had a small camera under one arm and a knapsack under
the other. He laughed when he saw me, and gave me an elbow to shake. ‘I’m frightfully busy,’
said he, ‘with that thing in there.’
‘But is it not some hoax?’ I said. ‘Do you really travel through time?’
‘Really and truly I do.’ And he looked frankly into my eyes. He hesitated. His eyewandered about the room. ‘I only want half an hour,’ he said. ‘I know why you came, and it’s
awfully good of you. There’s some magazines here. If you’ll stop to lunch I’ll prove you this
time travelling up to the hilt, specimen and all. If you’ll forgive my leaving you now?’
I consented, hardly comprehending then the full import of his words, and he nodded and
went on down the corridor. I heard the door of the laboratory slam, seated myself in a chair,
and took up a daily paper. What was he going to do before lunch-time? Then suddenly I was
reminded by an advertisement that I had promised to meet Richardson, the publisher, at two.
I looked at my watch, and saw that I could barely save that engagement. I got up and went
down the passage to tell the Time Traveller.
As I took hold of the handle of the door I heard an exclamation, oddly truncated at the
end, and a click and a thud. A gust of air whirled round me as I opened the door, and from
within came the sound of broken glass falling on the floor. The Time Traveller was not there. I
seemed to see a ghostly, indistinct figure sitting in a whirling mass of black and brass for a
moment — a figure so transparent that the bench behind with its sheets of drawings was
absolutely distinct; but this phantasm vanished as I rubbed my eyes. The Time Machine had
gone. Save for a subsiding stir of dust, the further end of the laboratory was empty. A pane of
the skylight had, apparently, just been blown in.
I felt an unreasonable amazement. I knew that something strange had happened, and
for the moment could not distinguish what the strange thing might be. As I stood staring, the
door into the garden opened, and the man-servant appeared.
We looked at each other. Then ideas began to come. ‘Has Mr. —— gone out that way?’
said I.
‘No, sir. No one has come out this way. I was expecting to find him here.’
At that I understood. At the risk of disappointing Richardson I stayed on, waiting for the
Time Traveller; waiting for the second, perhaps still stranger story, and the specimens and
photographs he would bring with him. But I am beginning now to fear that I must wait a
lifetime. The Time Traveller vanished three years ago. And, as everybody knows now, he has
never returned.

One cannot choose but wonder. Will he ever return? It may be that he swept back into
the past, and fell among the blood-drinking, hairy savages of the Age of Unpolished Stone;
into the abysses of the Cretaceous Sea; or among the grotesque saurians, the huge reptilian
brutes of the Jurassic times. He may even now — if I may use the phrase — be wandering on
some plesiosaurus-haunted Oolitic coral reef, or beside the lonely saline lakes of the Triassic
Age. Or did he go forward, into one of the nearer ages, in which men are still men, but with
the riddles of our own time answered and its wearisome problems solved? Into the manhood
of the race: for I, for my own part cannot think that these latter days of weak experiment,
fragmentary theory, and mutual discord are indeed man’s culminating time! I say, for my own
part. He, I know — for the question had been discussed among us long before the Time
Machine was made — thought but cheerlessly of the Advancement of Mankind, and saw in
the growing pile of civilization only a foolish heaping that must inevitably fall back upon and
destroy its makers in the end. If that is so, it remains for us to live as though it were not so.
But to me the future is still black and blank — is a vast ignorance, lit at a few casual places by
the memory of his story. And I have by me, for my comfort, two strange white flowers —
shrivelled now, and brown and flat and brittle — to witness that even when mind and strength
had gone, gratitude and a mutual tenderness still lived on in the heart of man.
The Wonderful Visit
First published: 1895

Chapter 1 — The Night of the Strange Bird

On the Night of the Strange Bird, many people at Sidderton (and some nearer) saw a
Glare on the Sidderford moor. But no one in Sidderford saw it, for most of Sidderford was
All day the wind had been rising, so that the larks on the moor chirruped fitfully near the
ground, or rose only to be driven like leaves before the wind. The sun set in a bloody welter of
clouds, and the moon was hidden. The glare, they say, was golden like a beam shining out of
the sky, not a uniform blaze, but broken all over by curving flashes lake the waving of swords.
It lasted but a moment and left the night dark and obsccure. There were letters about it in
Nature, and a rough drawing that no one thought very like.
None in Sidderford saw the light, but Annie Hooker Durgam’s wife, was lying awake, and
she saw the reflection of it — a flickering tongue of gold — dancing on the wall.
She, too, was one of those who heard the sound. The others who heard the sound were
Lumpy Durgan, the half-wit, and Amory’s mother. They said it was a sound like children
singing and a throbbing of harp strings, carried on a rush of notes like that which sometimes
comes from an organ. It began and ended like the opening and shutting of a door, and before
and after they heard nothing but the night wind howling over the moor and the noise of the
caves under Sidderford cliff. Amory’s mother said she wanted to cry when she heard it, bug
Lumpy was only sorry he could hear no more.
That is as much as anyone can tell you of the glare upon Sidderford Moor and the
alleged music therewith. And whether these had any real connexion with the Strange Bird
whose history follows, is more than I can say. But I set it down here for reasons that will be
more apparent as the story proceeds.
Chapter 2 — The Coming of the Strange Bird

Sandy Bright was coming down the road from Spinner’s carrying a side of bacon he had
taken in exchange for a clock. He saw nothing of the light but he heard and saw the Strange
Bird. He suddenly heard a flapping and a voice like a woman wailing, and being a nervous
man and all alone, he was alarmed forthwith, and turning (all a-tremble) saw something large
and black against the dim darkness of the cedars up the hill. It seemed to be coming right
down upon him, and incontinently he dropped his bacon and set off running, only to fall
He tried in vain — such was his state of mind — to remember the beginning of the Lord’s
Prayer. The strange bird flapped over him, something larger than himself, with a vast spread
of wings, and, as he thought, black. He screamed and gave himself up for lost. Then it went
past him, sailing down the hill, and, soaring over the vicarage, vanished into the hazy valley
towards Sidderford.
And Sandy Bright lay upon his stomach there, for ever so long, staring into the darkness
after the strange bird. At last he got upon his knees and began to thank Heaven for his
merciful deliverance, with his eyes downhill. He went on down into the village, talking aloud
and confessing his sins as he went, lest the strange bird should come back. All who heard him
thought him drunk. But from that night he was a changed man, and had done with
drunkenness and defrauding the revenue by selling silver ornaments without a licence. And
the side of bacon lay upon the hillside until the tallyman from Portburdock found it in the
The next who saw the Strange Bird was a solicitor’s clerk at Iping Hanger, who was
climbing the hill before breakfast, to see the sunrise. Save for a few dissolving wisps of cloud
the sky had been blown clear in the night. At first he thought it was an eagle he saw. It was
near the zenith, and incredibly remote, a mere bright speck above the pink cirri, and it seemed
as if it fluttered and beat itself against the sky, as an imprisoned swallow might do against a
window pane. Then down it came into the shadow of the earth, sweeping in a great curve
towards Portburdock and round over the Hanger, and so vanishing behind the woods of
Siddermorton Park. It seemed larger than a man. Just before it was hidden, the light of the
rising sun smote over the edge of the downs and touched its wings, and they flashed with the
brightness of flames and the colour of precious stones, and so passed, leaving the witness
A ploughman going to his work, along under the stone wall of Siddermorton Park, saw
the Strange Bird flash over him for a moment and vanish among the hazy interstices of the
beech trees. But he saw little of the colour of the wings, witnessing only that its legs, which
were long, seemed pink and bare like naked flesh, and its body mottled white. It smote like an
arrow through the air and was gone.
These were the first three eye-witnesses of the Strange Bird.
Now in these days one does not cower before the devil and one’s own sinfulness, or see
strange iridiscent wings in the light of dawn, and say nothing of it afterwards. The young
solicitor’s clerk told his mother and sisters at breakfast, and, afterwards, on his way to the
office at Portburdock, spoke of it to the blacksmith of Hammerpond, and spent the morning
with his fellow clerks marvelling instead of copying deeds. And Sandy Bright went to talk the
matter over with Mr. Jekyll, the “Primitive” minister, and the ploughman told old Hugh and
afterwards the vicar of Siddermorton.
“They are not an imaginative race about here,” said the Vicar of Siddermorton, “I wonder
how much of that was true. Barring that he thinks the wings were brown it soundsuncommonly like a Flamingo.”
Chapter 3 — The Hunting of the Strange Bird

The Vicar of Siddermorton (which is nine miles inland from Siddermouth as the crow
flies) was an ornithologist. Some such pursuit, botany, antiquity, folk-lore, is almost inevitable
for a single man in his position. He was given to geometry also, propounding occasionally
impossible problems in the Educational Times, but ornithology was his forte. He had already
added two visitors to the list of occasional British birds. His name was well-known in the
columns of the Zoologist (I am afraid it may be forgotten by now, for the world moves apace).
And on the day after the coming of the Strange Bird, came first one and then another to
confirm the ploughman’s story and tell him, not that it had any connection, of the Glare upon
Sidderford moor.
Now, the Vicar of Siddermorton had two rivals in his scientific pursuits; Gully of
Sidderton, who had actually seen the glare, and who it was sent the drawing to Nature, and
Borland the natural history dealer, who kept the marine laboratory at Portburdock. Borland,
the Vicar thought, should have stuck to his copepods, but instead he kept a taxidermist, and
took advantage of his littoral position to pick up rare sea birds. It was evident to anyone who
knew anything of collecting that both these men would be scouring the country after the
strange visitant, before twenty-four hours were out.
The Vicar’s eye rested on the back of Saunders’ British Birds, for he was in his study at
the time. Already in two places there was entered: “the only known British specimen was
secured by the Rev. K. Hilyer, Vicar of Siddermorton.” A third such entry. He doubted if any
other collector had that.
He looked at his watch — two. He had just lunched, and usually he “rested” in the
afternoon. He knew it would make him feel very disagreeable if he went out into the hot
sunshine-both on the top of his head and generally.
Yet Gully perhaps was out, prowling observant. Suppose it was something very good and
Gully got it!
His gun stood in the corner. (The thing had iridiscent wings and pink legs! The chromatic
conflict was certainly exceedingly stimulating). He took his gun.
He would have gone out by the glass doors and verandah, and down the garden into the
hill road, in order to avoid his housekeeper’s eye. He knew his gun expeditions were not
approved of. But advancing towards him up the garden, he saw the curate’s wife and her two
daughters, carrying tennis rackets. His curate’s wife was a young woman of immense will, who
used to play tennis on his lawn, and cut his roses, differ from him on doctrinal points, and
criticise his personal behaviour all over the parish. He went in abject fear of her, was always
trying to propitiate her. But so far he had clung to his ornithology...
However, he went out by the front door.
Chapter 4

If it were not for collectors England would be full, so to speak, of rare birds and wonderful
butterflies, strange flowers and a thousand interesting things. But happily the collector
prevents all that, either killing with his own hands or, by buying extravagantly, procuring
people of the lower classes to kill such eccentricities as appear. It makes work for people,
even though Acts of Parliament interfere. In this way, for instance, he is killing off the chough
in Cornwall, the Bath white butterfly, the Queen of Spain Fritillary; and can plume himself upon
the extermination of the Great Auk, and a hundred other rare birds and plants and insects. All
that is the work of the collector and his glory alone. In the name of Science. And this is right
and as it should be; eccentricity, in fact, is immorality — think over it again if you do not think
so now — just as eccentricity in one’s way of thinking is madness (I defy you to find another
definition that will fit all the cases of either); and if a species is rare it follows that it is not Fitted
to Survive. The collector is after all merely like the foot soldier in the days of heavy armour-he
leaves the combatants alone and cuts the throats of those who are overthrown. So one may
go through England from end to end in the summer time and see only eight or ten
commonplace wild flowers, and the commoner butterflies, and a dozen or so common birds,
and never be offended by any breach of the monotony, any splash of strange blossom or
flutter of unknown wing. All the rest have been “collected” years ago. For which cause we
should all love Collectors, and bear in mind what we owe them when their little collections are
displayed. These camphorated little drawers of theirs, their glass cases and blotting-paper
books, are the graves of the Rare and the Beautiful, the symbols of the Triumph of Leisure
(morally spent) over the Delights of Life. (All of which, as you very properly remark, has
nothing whatever to do with the Strange Bird.)
Chapter 5

There is a place on the moor where the black water shines among the succulent moss,
and the hairy sundew, eater of careless insects, spreads its red-stained hungry hands to the
God who gives his creatures — one to feed another. On a ridge thereby grow birches with a
silvery bark, and the soft green of the larch mingles with the dark green fir. Thither through
the honey humming heather came the Vicar, in the heat of the day, carrying a gun under his
arm, a gun loaded with swanshot for the Strange Bird. And over his disengaged hand he
carried a pocket handkerchief wherewith, ever and again, he wiped his beady face.
He went by and on past the big pond and the pool full of brown leaves where the Sidder
arises, and so by the road (which is at first sandy and then chalky) to the little gate that goes
into the park. There are seven steps up to the gate and on the further side six down again-lest
the deer escape-so that when the Vicar stood in the gateway his head was ten feet or more
above the ground. And looking where a tumult of bracken fronds filled the hollow between two
groups of beech, his eye caught something parti-coloured that wavered and went. Suddenly
his face gleamed and his muscles grew tense; he ducked his head, clutched his gun with both
hands, and stood still. Then watching keenly, he came on down the steps into the park, and
still holding his gun with both hands, crept rather than walked towards the jungle of bracken.
Nothing stirred, and he almost feared that his eyes had played him false, until he reached the
ferns and had gone rustling breast high into them. Then suddenly rose something full of
wavering colours, twenty yards or less in front of his face, and beating the air. In another
moment it had fluttered above the bracken and spread its pinions wide. He saw what it was,
his heart was in his mouth, and he fired out of pure surprise and habit.
There was a scream of superhuman agony, the wings beat the air twice, and the victim
came slanting swiftly downward and struck the ground — a struggling heap of writhing body,
broken wing and flying bloodstained plumes — upon the turfy slope behind.
The Vicar stood aghast, with his smoking gun in his hand. It was no bird at all, but a
youth with an extremely beautiful face, clad in a robe of saffron and with iridescent wings,
across whose pinions great waves of colour, flushes of purple and crimson, golden green and
intense blue, pursued one another as he writhed in his agony. Never had the Vicar seen such
gorgeous floods of colour, not stained glass windows, not the wings of butterflies, not even the
glories of crystals seen between prisms, no colours on earth could compare with them. Twice
the Angel raised himself, only to fall over sideways again. Then the beating of the wings
diminished, the terrified face grew pale, the floods of colour abated, and suddenly with a sob
he lay prone, and the changing hues of the broken wings faded swiftly into one uniform dull
grey hue.
“Oh! what has happened to me?” cried the Angel (for such it was), shuddering violently,
hands outstretched and clutching the ground, and then lying still.
“Dear me!” said the Vicar. “I had no idea.” He came forward cautiously. “Excuse me,” he
said, “I am afraid I have shot you.” It was the obvious remark.
The Angel seemed to become aware of his presence for the first time. He raised himself
by one hand, his brown eyes stared into the Vicar’s. Then, with a gasp, and biting his nether
lip, he struggled into a sitting position and surveyed the Vicar from top to toe.
“A man!” said the Angel, clasping his forehead; “a man in the maddest black clothes and
without a feather upon him. Then I was not deceived. I am indeed in the Land of Dreams!”
Chapter 6 — The Vicar and the Angel

Now there are some things frankly impossible. The weakest intellect will admit this
situation is impossible. The Athenaeum will probably say as much should it venture to review
this. Sunbespattered ferns, spreading beech trees, the Vicar and the gun are acceptable
enough. But this Angel is a different matter. Plain sensible people will scarcely go on with such
an extravagant book. And the Vicar fully appreciated this impossibility. But he lacked decision.
Consequently he went on with it, as you shall immediately hear. He was hot, it was after
dinner, he was in no mood for mental subtleties. The Angel had him at a disadvantage, and
further distracted him from the main issue by irrelevant iridescence and a violent fluttering. For
the moment it never occurred to the Vicar to ask whether the Angel was possible or not. He
accepted him in the confusion of the moment, and the mischief was done. Put yourself in his
place, my dear Athenceum. You go out shooting. You hit something. That alone would
disconcert you. You find you have hit an Angel, and he writhes about for a minute and then
sits up and addresses you. He makes no apology for his own impossibility. Indeed, he carries
the charge clean into your camp. “A man!” he says, pointing. “A man in the maddest black
clothes and without a feather upon him. Then I was not deceived. I am indeed in the Land of
Dreams!” You must answer him. Unless you take to your heels. Or blow his brains out with
your second barrel as an escape from the controversy.
“The Land of Dreams! Pardon me if I suggest you have just come out of it,” was the
Vicar’s remark.
“How can that be?” said the Angel.
“Your wing,” said the Vicar, “is bleeding. Before we talk, may I have the pleasure — the
melancholy pleasure — of tying it up? I am really most sincerely sorry...” The Angel put his
hand behind his back and winced.
The Vicar assisted his victim to stand up. The Angel turned gravely and the Vicar, with
numberless insignificant panting parentheses, carefully examined the injured wings. (They
articulated, he observed with interest, to a kind of second glenoid on the outer and upper edge
of the shoulder blade. The left wing had suffered little except the loss of some of the primary
wing-quills, and a shot or so in the ala spuria, but the humerus bone of the right was evidently
smashed.) The Vicar stanched the bleeding as well as he could and tied up the bone with his
pocket handkerchief and the neck wrap his housekeeper made him carry in all weathers.
“I’m afraid you will not be able to fly for some time,” said he, feeling the bone.
“I don’t like this new sensation,” said the Angel.
“The Pain when I feel your bone?”
“The what?” said the Angel.
“The Pain.”
“‘Pain’— you call it. No, I certainly don’t like the Pain. Do you have much of this Pain in
the Land of Dreams?”
“A very fair share,” said the Vicar. “Is it new to you?”
“Quite,” said the Angel. “I don’t like it.”
“How curious!” said the Vicar, and bit at the end of a strip of linen to tie a knot. “I think
this bandaging must serve for the present,” he said. “I’ve studied ambulance work before, but
never the bandaging up of wing wounds. Is your Pain any better?”
“It glows now instead of flashing,” said the Angel.
“I am afraid you will find it glow for some time,” said the Vicar, still intent on the wound.
The Angel gave a shrug of the wing and turned round to look at the Vicar again. He had
been trying to keep an eye on the Vicar over his shoulder during all their interview. He lookedat him from top to toe with raised eyebrows and a growing smile on his beautiful soft-featured
face. “It seems so odd,” he said with a sweet little laugh, “to be talking to a Man!”
“Do you know,” said the Vicar, “now that I come to think of it, it is equally odd to me that I
should be talking to an Angel. I am a somewhat matter-of-fact person. A Vicar has to be.
Angels I have always regarded as — artistic conceptions —”
“Exactly what we think of men.”
“But surely you have seen so many men —”
“Never before to-day. In pictures and books, times enough of course. But I have seen
several since the sunrise, solid real men, besides a horse or so those Unicorn things you
know, without horns and quite a number of those grotesque knobby things called ‘cows.’ I was
naturally a little frightened at so many mythical monsters, and came to hide here until it was
dark. I suppose it will be dark again presently like it was at first. Phew! This Pain of yours is
poor fun. I hope I shall wake up directly.”
“I don’t understand quite,” said the Vicar, knitting his brows and tapping his forehead with
his flat hand. “Mythical monster!” The worst thing he had been called for years hitherto was a
‘mediaeval anachronism’ (by an advocate of Disestablishment). “Do I understand that you
consider me as-as something in a dream?”
“Of course,” said the Angel smiling.
“And this world about me, these rugged trees and spreading fronds —”
“Is all so very dream-like,” said the Angel. “Just exactly what one dreams of — or artists
“You have artists then among the Angels?”
“All kinds of artists, Angels with wonderful imaginations, who invent men and cows and
eagles and a thousand impossible creatures.”
“Impossible creatures!” said the Vicar.
“Impossible creatures,” said the Angel. “Myths.”
“But I’m real!” said the Vicar. “I assure you I’m real.”
The Angel shrugged his wings and winced and smiled. “I can always tell when I am
dreaming,” he said.
“You dreaming,” said the Vicar. He looked round him.
“You dreaming!” he repeated. His mind worked diffusely.
He held out his hand with all his fingers moving. “I have it!” he said. “I begin to see.” A
really brilliant idea was dawning upon his mind. He had not studied mathematics at Cambridge
for nothing, after all. “Tell me, please. Some animals of your world... of the Real World, real
animals you know.”
“Real animals!” said the Angel smiling. “Why — there’s Griffins and Dragons — and
Jabberwocks and Cherubim — and Sphinxes-and the Hippogriff — and Mermaids — and
Satyrs — and...”
“Thank you,” said the Vicar as the Angel appeared to be warming to his work; “thank
you. That is quite enough. I begin to understand.”
He paused for a moment, his face pursed up. “Yes... I begin to see it.”
“See what?” asked the Angel.
“The Griffins and Satyrs and so forth. It’s as clear...”
“I don’t see them,” said the Angel.
“No, the whole point is they are not to be seen in this world. But our men with
imaginations have told us all about them, you know. And even I at times... there are places in
this village where you must simply take what they set before you, or give offence — I, I say,
have seen in my dreams Jabberwocks, Bogle brutes, Mandrakes... From our point of view,
you know, they are Dream Creatures...”
“Dream Creatures!” said the Angel. “How singular! This is a very curious dream. A kind of
topsy-turvy one. You call men real and angels a myth. It almost makes one think that in someodd way there must be two worlds as it were...”
“At least Two,” said the Vicar.
“Lying somewhere close together, and yet scarcely suspecting...”
“As near as page to page of a book.”
“Penetrating each other, living each its own life. This is really a delicious dream!”
“And never dreaming of each other.”
“Except when people go a dreaming!”
“Yes,” said the Angel thoughtfully. “It must be something of the sort. And that reminds
me. Sometimes when I have been dropping asleep, or drowsing under the noon-tide sun, I
have seen strange corrugated faces just like yours, going by me, and trees with green leaves
upon them, and such queer uneven ground as this... It must be so. I have fallen into another
“Sometimes,” began the Vicar, “at bedtime, when I have been just on the edge of
consciousness, I have seen faces as beautiful as yours, and the strange dazzling vistas of a
wonderful scene, that flowed past me, winged shapes soaring over it, and wonderful —
sometimes terrible — forms going to and fro. I have even heard sweet music too in my ears...
It may be that as we withdraw our attention from the world of sense, the pressing world about
us, as we pass into the twilight of repose, other worlds... Just as we see the stars, those other
worlds in space, when the glare of day recedes... And the artistic dreamers who see such
things most clearly...”
They looked at one another.
“And in some incomprehensible manner I have fallen into this world of yours out of my
own!” said the Angel, “into the world of my dreams, grown real.”
He looked about him. “Into the world of my dreams.”
“It is confusing,” said the Vicar. “It almost makes one think there may be (ahem) Four
Dimensions after all. In which case, of course,” (he went on hurriedly for he loved geometrical
speculations and took a certain pride in his knowledge of them) “there may be any number of
three dimensional universes packed side by side, and all dimly dreaming of one another.
There may be world upon world, universe upon universe. It’s perfectly possible. There’s
nothing so incredible as the absolutely possible. But I wonder how you came to fall out of your
world into mine...”
“Dear me!” said the Angel; “there’s deer and a stag! Just as they draw them on the coats
of arms. How grotesque it all seems! Can I really be awake?”
He rubbed his knuckles into his eyes.
The half-dozen of dappled deer came in Indian file obliquely through the trees and halted,
watching. “It’s no dream — I am really a solid concrete Angel, in Dream Land,” said the Angel.
He laughed. The Vicar stood surveying him. The Reverend gentleman was pulling his mouth
askew after a habit he had, and slowly stroking his chin. He was asking himself whether he
too was not in the Land of Dreams.
Chapter 7

Now in the land of the Angels, so the Vicar learnt in the course of many conversations,
there is neither pain nor trouble nor death, marrying nor giving in marriage, birth nor
forgetting. Only at times new things begin. It is a land without hill or dale, a wonderfully level
land, glittering with strange buildings, with incessant sunlight or full moon, and with incessant
breezes blowing through the Aeolian traceries of the trees. It is Wonderland, with glittering
seas hanging in the sky, across which strange fleets go sailing, none know whither. There the
flowers glow in Heaven and the stars shine about one’s feet and the breath of life is a delight.
The land goes on for ever-there is no solar system nor interstellar space such as there is in
our universe — and the air goes upward past the sun into the uttermost abyss of their sky.
And there is nothing but Beauty there — all the beauty in our art is but feeble rendering of
faint glimpses of that wonderful world, and our composers, our original composers, are those
who hear, however faintly, the dust of melody that drives before its winds. And the Angels,
and wonderful monsters of bronze and marble and living fire, go to and fro therein.
It is a land of Law — for whatever is, is under the law but its laws all, in some strange
way, differ from ours. Their geometry is different because their space has a curve in it so that
all their planes are cylinders; and their law of Gravitation is not according to the law of inverse
squares, and there are four-and-twenty primary colours instead of only three. Most of the
fantastic things of our science are common-places there, and all our earthly science would
seem to them the maddest dreaming. There are no flowers upon their plants, for instance, but
jets of coloured fire. That, of course, would seem mere nonsense to you because you do not
understand. Most of what the Angel told the Vicar, indeed, the Vicar could not realise,
because his own experiences, being only of this world of matter, warred against his
understanding. It was too strange to imagine.
What had jolted these twin universes together so that the Angel had fallen suddenly into
Sidderford, neither the Angel nor the Vicar could tell. Nor for the matter of that could the
author of this story. The author is concerned with the facts of the case, and has neither the
desire nor the confidence to explain them. Explanations are the fallacy of a scientific age. And
the cardinal fact of the case is this, that out in Siddermorton Park, with the glory of some
wonderful world where there is neither sorrow nor sighing, still clinging to him, on the 4th of
August, 1895, stood an Angel, bright and beautiful, talking to the Vicar of Siddermorton about
the plurality of worlds. The author will swear to the Angel, if need be; and there he draws the
Chapter 8

“I have,” said the Angel, “a most unusual feeling here. Have had since sunrise. I don’t
remember ever having any feeling here before.”
“Not pain, I hope,” said the Vicar.
“Oh no! It is quite different from that a kind of vacuous feeling.”
“The atmospheric pressure, perhaps, is a little different,” the Vicar began, feeling his
“And do you know, I have also the most curious sensations in my mouth almost as if it’s
so absurd! as if I wanted to stuff things into it.”
“Bless me!” said the Vicar. “Of course! You’re hungry!”
“Hungry!” said the Angel. “What’s that?”
“Don’t you eat?”
“Eat! The word’s quite new to me.”
“Put food into your mouth, you know. One has to here. You will soon learn. If you don’t,
you get thin and miserable, and suffer a great deal pain, you know and finally you die.”
“Die!” said the Angel. “That’s another strange word!”
“It’s not strange here. It means leaving off, you know,” said the Vicar.
“We never leave off,” said the Angel.
“You don’t know what may happen to you in this world,” said the Vicar, thinking him over.
“Possibly if you are feeling hungry, and can feel pain and have your wings broken, you may
even have to die before you get out of it again. At any rate you had better try eating. For my
own part (ahem)! there are many more disagreeable things.”
“I suppose I had better Eat,” said the Angel. “If it’s not too difficult. I don’t like this ‘Pain’
of yours, and I don’t like this ‘Hungry.’ If your ‘Die’ is anything like it, I would prefer to Eat.
What a very odd world this is!”
“To Die,” said the Vicar, “is generally considered worse than either pain or hunger... It
“You must explain all that to me later,” said the Angel. “Unless I wake up. At present,
please show me how to eat. If you will. I feel a kind of urgency...”
“Pardon me,” said the Vicar, and offered an elbow. “If I may have the pleasure of
entertaining you. My house lies yonder not a couple of miles from here.”
“Your House!” said the Angel a little puzzled; but he took the Vicar’s arm affectionately,
and the two, conversing as they went, waded slowly through the luxuriant bracken,
sunmottled under the trees, and on over the stile in the park palings, and so across the
beeswarming heather for a mile or more, down the hillside, home.
You would have been charmed at the couple could you have seen them. The Angel,
slight of figure, scarcely five feet high, and with a beautiful, almost effeminate face, such as
an Italian old Master might have painted. (Indeed, there is one in the National Gallery [Tobias
and the Angel, by some artist unknown] not at all unlike him so far as face and spirit go.) He
was robed simply in a purple-wrought saffron blouse, bare-kneed and bare-footed, with his
wings (broken now, and a leaden grey) folded behind him. The Vicar was a short, rather stout
figure, rubicund, red-haired, clean-shaven, and with bright ruddy brown eyes. He wore a
piebald straw hat with a black ribbon, a very neat white tie, and a fine gold watch-chain. He
was so greatly interested in his companion that it only occurred to him when he was in sight of
the Vicarage that he had left his gun lying just where he had dropped it amongst the bracken.
He was rejoiced to hear that the pain of the bandaged wing fell rapidly in intensity.
Chapter 9 — Parenthesis on Angels

Let us be plain. The Angel of this story is the Angel of Art, not the Angel that one must
be irreverent to touch — neither the Angel of religious feeling nor the Angel of popular belief.
The last we all know. She is alone among the angelic hosts in being distinctly feminine: she
wears a robe of immaculate, unmitigated white with sleeves, is fair, with long golden tresses,
and has eyes of the blue of Heaven. Just a pure woman she is, pure maiden or pure matron,
in her robe de nuit, and with wings attached to her shoulder blades. Her callings are domestic
and sympathetic, she watches over a cradle or assists a sister soul heavenward. Often she
bears a palm leaf, but one would not be surprised if one met her carrying a warming-pan
softly to some poor chilly sinner. She it was who came down in a bevy to Marguerite in prison,
in the amended last scene in Faust at the Lyceum, and the interesting and improving little
children that are to die young, have visions of such angels in the novels of Mrs. Henry Wood.
This white womanliness with her indescribable charm of lavender-like holiness, her aroma of
clean, methodical lives, is, it would seem after all, a purely Teutonic invention. Latin thought
knows her not; the old masters have none of her. She is of a piece with that gentle innocent
ladylike school of art whereof the greatest triumph is “a lump in one’s throat,” and where wit
and passion, scorn and pomp, have no place. The white angel was made in Germany, in the
land of blonde women and the domestic sentiments. She comes to us cool and worshipful,
pure and tranquil, as silently soothing as the breadth and calmness of the starlit sky, which
also is so unspeakably dear to the Teutonic soul... We do her reverence. And to the angels of
the Hebrews, those spirits of power and mystery, to Raphael, Zadkiel, and Michael, of whom
only Watts has caught the shadow, of whom only Blake has seen the splendour, to them too,
do we do reverence.
But this Angel the Vicar shot is, we say, no such angel at all, but the Angel of Italian art,
polychromatic and gay. He comes from the land of beautiful dreams and not from any holier
place. At best he is a popish creature. Bear patiently, therefore, with his scattered remiges,
and be not hasty with your charge of irreverence before the story is read.
Chapter 10 — At the Vicarage

The Curate’s wife and her two daughters and Mrs. Jehoram were still playing at tennis on
the lawn behind the Vicar’s study, playing keenly and talking in gasps about paper patterns for
blouses. But the Vicar forgot and came in that way.
They saw the Vicar’s hat above the rhododendrons, and a bare curly head beside him. “I
must ask him about Susan Wiggin,” said the Curate’s wife. She was about to serve, and stood
with a racket in one hand and a ball between the fingers of the other. “He really ought to have
gone to see her being the Vicar. Not George. I— Ah!”
For the two figures suddenly turned the corner and were visible. The Vicar, arm in arm
with —
You see, it came on the Curate’s wife suddenly. The Angel’s face being towards her she
saw nothing of the wings. Only a face of unearthly beauty in a halo of chestnut hair, and a
graceful figure clothed in a saffron garment that barely reached the knees. The thought of
those knees flashed upon the Vicar at once. He too was horrorstruck. So were the two girls
and Mrs. Jehoram. All horrorstruck. The Angel stared in astonishment at the horrorstruck
group. You see, he had never seen anyone horrorstruck before.
“Mister Hilyer!” said the Curate’s wife. “This is too much!” She stood speechless for a
moment. “Oh!”
She swept round upon the rigid girls. “Come!” The Vicar opened and shut his voiceless
mouth. The world hummed and spun about him. There was a whirling of zephyr skirts, four
impassioned faces sweeping towards the open door of the passage that ran through the
vicarage. He felt his position went with them.
“Mrs. Mendham,” said the Vicar, stepping forward. “Mrs. Mendham. You don’t
understand —”
“Oh!” they all said again.
One, two, three, four skirts vanished in the doorway. The Vicar staggered half way
across the lawn and stopped, aghast. “This comes”, he heard the Curate’s wife say, out of the
depth of the passage, “of having an unmarried vicar —” The umbrella stand wobbled. The
front door of the vicarage slammed like a minute gun. There was silence for a space.
“I might have thought,” he said. “She is always so hasty.”
He put his hand to his chin — a habit with him. Then turned his face to his companion.
The Angel was evidently well bred. He was holding up Mrs. Jehoram’s sunshade — she had
left it on one of the cane chairs — and examining it with extraordinary interest. He opened it.
“What a curious little mechanism!” he said. “What can it be for?”
The Vicar did not answer. The angelic costume certainly was — the Vicar knew it was a
case for a French phrase — but he could scarcely remember it. He so rarely used French. It
was not de trop, he knew. Anything but de trop. The Angel was de trop, but certainly not his
costume. Ah! Sans culotte!
The Vicar examined his visitor critically for the first time. “He will be difficult to explain,”
he said to himself softly.
The Angel stuck the sunshade into the turf and went to smell the sweet briar. The
sunshine fell upon his brown hair and gave it almost the appearance of a halo. He pricked his
finger. “Odd!” he said. “Pain again.”
“Yes,” said the Vicar, thinking aloud. “He’s very beautiful and curious as he is. I should
like him best so. But I am afraid I must.”
He approached the Angel with a nervous cough.
Chapter 11

“Those,” said the Vicar, “were ladies.”
“How grotesque,” said the Angel, smiling and smelling the sweet briar. “And such quaint
“Possibly,” said the Vicar. “Did you, ahem, notice how they behaved?”
“They went away. Seemed, indeed, to run away. Frightened? I, of course, was frightened
at things without wings. I hope — they were not frightened at my wings?”
“At your appearance generally,” said the Vicar, glancing involuntarily at the pink feet.
“Dear me! It never occurred to me. I suppose I seemed as odd to them as you did to
me.” He glanced down. “And my feet. You have hoofs like a hippogriff.”
“Boots,” corrected the Vicar.
“Boots, you call them! But anyhow, I am sorry I alarmed —”
“You see,” said the Vicar, stroking his chin, “our ladies, ahem, have peculiar views —
rather inartistic views — about, ahem, clothing. Dressed as you are, I am afraid, I am really
afraid that — beautiful as your costume certainly is — you will find yourself somewhat, ahem,
somewhat isolated in society. We have a little proverb, ‘When in Rome, ahem, one must do as
the Romans do.’ I can assure you that, assuming you are desirous to, ahem, associate with
us-during your involuntary stay —”
The Angel retreated a step or so as the Vicar came nearer and nearer in his attempt to
be diplomatic and confidential. The beautiful face grew perplexed. “I don’t quite understand.
Why do you keep making these noises in your throat? Is it Die or Eat, or any of those...”
“As your host,” interrupted the Vicar, and stopped.
“As my host,” said the Angel.
“Would you object, pending more permanent arrangements, to invest yourself, ahem, in
a suit, an entirely new suit I may say, like this I have on?”
“Oh!” said the Angel. He retreated so as to take in the Vicar from top to toe. “Wear
clothes like yours!” he said. He was puzzled but amused. His eyes grew round and bright, his
mouth puckered at the corners.
“Delightful!” he said, clapping his hands together. “What a mad, quaint dream this is!
Where are they?” He caught at the neck of the saffron robe.
“Indoors!” said the Vicar. “This way. We will change-indoors!”
Chapter 12

So the Angel was invested in a pair of nether garments of the Vicar’s, a shirt, ripped
down the back (to accommodate the wings), socks, shoes — the Vicar’s dress shoes —
collar, tie, and light overcoat. But putting on the latter was painful, and reminded the Vicar that
the bandaging was temporary. “I will ring for tea at once, and send Grummet down for
Crump,” said the Vicar. “And dinner shall be earlier.” While the Vicar shouted his orders on the
landing rails, the Angel surveyed himself in the cheval glass with immense delight. If he was a
stranger to pain, he was evidently no stranger-thanks perhaps to dreaming-to the pleasure of
They had tea in the drawing-room. The Angel sat on the music stool (music stool
because of his wings). At first he wanted to lie on the hearthrug. He looked much less radiant
in the Vicar’s clothes, than he had done upon the moor when dressed in saffron. His face
shone still, the colour of his hair and cheeks was strangely bright, and there was a
superhuman light in his eyes, but his wings under the overcoat gave him the appearance of a
hunchback. The garments, indeed, made quite a terrestrial thing of him; the trousers were
puckered transversely, and the shoes a size or so too large.
He was charmingly affable and quite ignorant of the most elementary facts of civilisation.
Eating came without much difficulty, and the Vicar had an entertaining time teaching him how
to take tea. “What a mess it is! What a dear grotesque ugly world you live in!” said the Angel.
“Fancy stuffing things into your mouth! We use our mouths just to talk and sing with. Our
world, you know, is almost incurably beautiful. We get so very little ugliness, that I find all
this... delightful.”
Mrs. Hinijer, the Vicar’s housekeeper, looked at the Angel suspiciously when she brought
in the tea. She thought him rather a “queer customer.” What she would have thought had she
seen him in saffron no one can tell.
The Angel shuffled about the room with his cup of tea in one hand, and the bread and
butter in the other, and examined the Vicar’s furniture. Outside the French windows the lawn,
with its array of dahlias and sunflowers, glowed in the warm sunlight, and Mrs. Jehoram’s
sunshade stood thereon like a triangle of fire. He thought the Vicar’s portrait over the mantel
very curious indeed, could not understand what it was there for. “You have yourself round,” he
said, apropos of the portrait, “Why want yourself flat?” and he was vastly amused at the glass
fire screen. He found the oak chairs odd — “You’re not square, are you?” he said, when the
Vicar explained their use. “We never double ourselves up. We lie about on the asphodel when
we want to rest.”
“The chair,” said the Vicar, “to tell you the truth, has always puzzled me. It dates, I think,
from the days when the floors were cold and very dirty. I suppose we have kept up the habit.
It’s become a kind of instinct with us to sit on chairs. Anyhow, if I went to see one of my
parishioners, and suddenly spread myself out on the floor — the natural way of it — I don’t
know what she would do. It would be all over the parish in no time. Yet it seems the natural
method of reposing, to recline. The Greeks and Romans —”
“What is this?” said the Angel abruptly.
“That’s a stuffed kingfisher. I killed it.”
“Killed it!”
“Shot it,” said the Vicar, “with a gun.”
“Shot! As you did me?”
“I didn’t kill you, you see. Fortunately.”
“Is killing making like that?”“In a way.”
“Dear me! And you wanted to make me like that-wanted to put glass eyes in me and
string me up in a glass case full of ugly green and brown stuff?”
“You see,” began the Vicar, “I scarcely understood —”
“Is that ‘die’?” asked the Angel suddenly.
“That is dead; it died.”
“Poor little thing. I must eat a lot. But you say you killed it. Why?”
“You see,” said the Vicar, “I take an interest in birds, and I (ahem) collect them. I wanted
the specimen —”
The Angel stared at him for a moment with puzzled eyes. “A beautiful bird like that!” he
said with a shiver. “Because the fancy took you. You wanted the specimen!”
He thought for a minute. “Do you often kill?” he asked the Vicar.
Chapter 13 — The Man of Science

Then Doctor Crump arrived. Grummet had met him not a hundred yards from the
vicarage gate. He was a large, rather heavy-looking man, with a clean-shaven face and a
double chin. He was dressed in a grey morning coat (he always affected grey), with a
chequered black and white tie. “What’s the trouble?” he said, entering and staring without a
shadow of surprise at the Angel’s radiant face.
“This — ahem — gentleman,” said the Vicar, “or — ah — Angel” — the Angel bowed —
“is suffering from a gunshot wound.”
“Gunshot wound!” said Doctor Crump. “In July! May I look at it, Mr. Angel, I think you
“He will probably be able to assuage your pain,” said the Vicar. “Let me assist you to
remove your coat?”
The Angel turned obediently.
“Spinal curvature?” muttered Doctor Crump quite audibly, walking round behind the
Angel. “No! abnormal growth. Hullo! This is odd!” He clutched the left wing. “Curious,” he said.
“Reduplication of the anterior limb — bifid coracoid. Possible, of course, but I’ve never seen it
before.” The Angel winced under his hands. “Humerus. Radius and Ulna. All there. Congenital,
of course. Humerus broken. Curious integumentary simulation of feathers. Dear me. Almost
avian. Probably of considerable interest in comparative anatomy. I never did! — How did this
gunshot happen, Mr. Angel?”
The Vicar was amazed at the Doctor’s matter-of-fact manner.
“Our friend,” said the Angel, moving his head at the Vicar.
“Unhappily it is my doing,” said the Vicar, stepping forward, explanatory. “I mistook the
gentleman — the Angel —(ahem)— for a large bird —”
“Mistook him for a large bird! What next? Your eyes want seeing to,” said Doctor Crump.
“I’ve told you so before.” He went on patting and feeling, keeping time with a series of grunts
and inarticulate muttering...”But this is really a very good bit of amateur bandaging,” said he. “I
think I shall leave it. Curious malformation this is! Don’t you find it inconvenient, Mr. Angel?”
He suddenly walked round so as to look in the Angel’s face.
The Angel thought he referred to the wound. “It is rather,” he said.
“If it wasn’t for the bones I should say paint with iodine night and morning. Nothing like
iodine. You could paint your face flat with it. But the osseous outgrowth, the bones, you know,
complicate things. I could saw them off, of course. It’s not a thing one should have done in a
hurry —”
“Do you mean my wings?” said the Angel in alarm.
“Wings!” said the Doctor. “Eigh? Call ‘em wings! Yes-what else should I mean?”
“Saw them off!” said the Angel.
“Don’t you think so? It’s of course your affair. I am only advising —”
“Saw them off! What a funny creature you are!” said the Angel, beginning to laugh.
“As you will,” said the Doctor. He detested people who laughed. “The things are curious,”
he said, turning to the Vicar. “If inconvenient”-to the Angel. “I never heard of such complete
reduplication before — at least among animals. In plants it’s common enough. Were you the
only one in your family?” He did not wait for a reply. “Partial cases of the fission of limbs are
not at all uncommon, of course, Vicar — six-fingered children, calves with six feet, and cats
with double toes, you know. May I assist you?” he said, turning to the Angel who was
struggling with the coat. “But such a complete reduplication, and so avian, too! It would be
much less remarkable if it was simply another pair of arms.”The coat was got on and he and the Angel stared at one another.
“Really,” said the Doctor, “one begins to understand how that beautiful myth of the
angels arose. You look a little hectic, Mr. Angel — feverish. Excessive brilliance is almost
worse as a symptom than excessive pallor. Curious your name should be Angel. I must send
you a cooling draught, if you should feel thirsty in the night...”
He made a memorandum on his shirt cuff. The Angel watched him thoughtfully, with the
dawn of a smile in his eyes.
“One minute, Crump,” said the Vicar, taking the Doctor’s arm and leading him towards
the door.
The Angel’s smile grew brighter. He looked down at his black-clad legs. “He positively
thinks I am a man!” said the Angel. “What he makes of the wings beats me altogether. What a
queer creature he must be! This is really a most extraordinary Dream!”
Chapter 14

“That is an Angel,” whispered the Vicar. “You don’t understand.”
“What?” said the Doctor in a quick, sharp voice. His eyebrows went up and he smiled.
“But the wings?”
“Quite natural, quite... if a little abnormal.”
“Are you sure they are natural?”
“My dear fellow, everything that is, is natural. There is nothing unnatural in the world. If I
thought there was I should give up practice and go into Le Grand Chartreuse. There are
abnormal phenomena, of course. And —”
“But the way I came upon him,” said the Vicar.
“Yes, tell me where you picked him up,” said the Doctor. He sat down on the hall table.
The Vicar began rather hesitatingly-he was not very good at story telling — with the
rumours of a strange great bird. He told the story in clumsy sentences — for, knowing the
Bishop as he did, with that awful example always before him he dreaded getting his pulpit
style into his daily conversation and at every third sentence or so, the Doctor made a
downward movement of his head-the corners of his mouth tucked away, so to speak-as
though he ticked off the phases of the story and so far found it just as it ought to be.
“Selfhypnotism,” he murmured once.
“I beg your pardon?” said the Vicar.
“Nothing,” said the Doctor. “Nothing, I assure you. Go on. This is extremely interesting.”
The Vicar told him he went out with his gun.
“After lunch, I think you said?” interrupted the Doctor.
“Immediately after,” said the Vicar.
“You should not do such things, you know. But go on, please.”
He came to the glimpse of the Angel from the gate.
“In the full glare,” said the Doctor, in parenthesis. “It was seventy-nine in the shade.”
When the Vicar had finished, the Doctor pressed his lips together tighter than ever,
smiled faintly, and looked significantly into the Vicar’s eyes.
“You don’t...” began the Vicar, falteringly.
The Doctor shook his head. “Forgive me,” he said, putting his hand on the Vicar’s arm.
“You go out,” he said, “on a hot lunch and on a hot afternoon. Probably over eighty. Your
mind, what there is of it, is whirling with avian expectations. I say, ‘what there is of it,’ because
most of your nervous energy is down there, digesting your dinner. A man who has been lying
in the bracken stands up before you and you blaze away. Over he goes — and as it happens
— as it happens — he has reduplicate fore-limbs, one pair being not unlike wings. It’s a
coincidence certainly. And as for his iridescent colours and so forth —. Have you never had
patches of colour swim before your eyes before, on a brilliant sunlight day?... Are you sure
they were confined to the wings? Think.”
“But he says he is an Angel!” said the Vicar, staring out of his little round eyes, his plump
hands in his pockets.
“Ah!” said the Doctor with his eye on the Vicar. “I expected as much.” He paused.
“But don’t you think...” began the Vicar.
“That man,” said the Doctor in a low, earnest voice, “is a mattoid.”
“A what?” said the Vicar.
“A mattoid. An abnormal man. Did you notice the effeminate delicacy of his face? His
tendency to quite unmeaning laughter? His neglected hair? Then consider his singular
dress...”The Vicar’s hand went up to his chin.
“Marks of mental weakness,” said the Doctor. “Many of this type of degenerate show this
same disposition to assume some vast mysterious credentials. One will call himself the Prince
of Wales, another the Archangel Gabriel, another the Deity even. Ibsen thinks he is a Great
Teacher, and Maeterlink a new Shakespeare. I’ve just been reading all about it-in Nordau. No
doubt his odd deformity gave him an idea...”
“But really,” began the Vicar.
“No doubt he’s slipped away from confinement.”
“I do not altogether accept...”
“You will. If not, there’s the police, and failing that, advertisement; but, of course, his
people may want to hush it up. It’s a sad thing in a family...”
“He seems so altogether...”
“Probably you’ll hear from his friends in a day or so,” said the Doctor, feeling for his
watch. “He can’t live far from here, I should think. He seems harmless enough. I must come
along and see that wing again to-morrow.” He slid off the hall table and stood up.
“Those old wives’ tales still have their hold on you,” he said, patting the Vicar on the
shoulder. “But an angel, you know ha, ha!”
“I certainly did think...” said the Vicar dubiously.
“Weigh the evidence,” said the Doctor, still fumbling at his watch. “Weigh the evidence
with our instruments of precision. What does it leave you? Splashes of colour, spots of
fancy-muscce volantes.”
“And yet,” said the Vicar, “I could almost swear to the glory on his wings...”
“Think it over,” said the Doctor (watch out); “hot afternoon — brilliant sunshine — boiling
down on your head... But really I must be going. It is a quarter to five. I’ll see your-angel (ha,
ha!) to-morrow again, if no one has been to fetch him in the meanwhile. Your bandaging was
really very good. I flatter myself on that score. Our ambulance classes were a success you
see... Good afternoon.”
Chapter 15 — The Curate

The Vicar opened the door half mechanically to let out Crump, and saw Mendham, his
curate, coming up the pathway by the hedge of purple vetch and meadowsweet. At that his
hand went up to his chin and his eyes grew perplexed. Suppose he was deceived. The Doctor
passed the Curate with a sweep of his hand from his hat brim. Crump was an extraordinarily
clever fellow, the Vicar thought, and knew far more of anyone’s brain than one did oneself.
The Vicar felt that so acutely. It made the coming explanation difficult. Suppose he were to go
back into the drawing-room, and find just a tramp asleep on the hearthrug.
Mendham was a cadaverous man with a magnificent beard. He looked, indeed, as
though he had run to beard as a mustard plant does to seed. But when he spoke you found
he had a voice as well.
“My wife came home in a dreadful state,” he brayed out at long range.
“Come in,” said the Vicar; “come in. Most remarkable occurrence. Please come in. Come
into the study. I’m really dreadfully sorry. But when I explain...”
“And apologise, I hope,” brayed the Curate.
“And apologise. No, not that way. This way. The study.”
“Now what was that woman?” said the Curate, turning on the Vicar as the latter closed
the study door.
“What woman?”
“But really!”
“The painted creature in light attire — disgustingly light attire, to speak freely — with
whom you were promenading the garden.”
“My dear Mendham that was an Angel!”
“A very pretty Angel?”
“The world is getting so matter-of-fact,” said the Vicar.
“The world,” roared the Curate, “grows blacker every day. But to find a man in your
position, shamelessly, openly...”
“Bother!” said the Vicar aside. He rarely swore. “Look here, Mendham, you really
misunderstand. I can assure you...”
“Very well,” said the Curate. “Explain!” He stood with his lank legs apart, his arms folded,
scowling at his Vicar over his big beard.
(Explanations, I repeat, I have always considered the peculiar fallacy of this scientific
The Vicar looked about him helplessly. The world had all gone dull and dead. Had he
been dreaming all the afternoon? Was there really an angel in the drawing-room? Or was he
the sport of a complicated hallucination?
“Well?” said Mendham, at the end of a minute.
The Vicar’s hand fluttered about his chin. “It’s such a round-about story,” he said.
“No doubt it will be,” said Mendham harshly.
The Vicar restrained a movement of impatience.
“I went out to look for a strange bird this afternoon... Do you believe in angels,
Mendham, real angels?”
“I’m not here to discuss theology. I am the husband of an insulted woman.”
“But I tell you it’s not a figure of speech; this is an angel, a real angel with wings. He’s in
the next room now. You do misunderstand me, so...”
“Really, Hilyer —”“It is true I tell you, Mendham. I swear it is true.” The Vicar’s voice grew impassioned.
“What sin I have done that I should entertain and clothe angelic visitants, I don’t know. I only
know that — inconvenient as it undoubtedly will be — I have an angel now in the
drawingroom, wearing my new suit and finishing his tea. And he’s stopping with me, indefinitely, at my
invitation. No doubt it was rash of me. But I can’t turn him out, you know, because Mrs.
Mendham — I may be a weakling, but I am still a gentleman.”
“Really, Hilyer —”
“I can assure you it is true.” There was a note of hysterical desperation in the Vicar’s
voice. “I fired at him, taking him for a flamingo, and hit him in the wing.”
“I thought this was a case for the Bishop. I find it is a case for the Lunacy
“Come and see him, Mendham!”
“But there are no angels.”
“We teach the people differently,” said the Vicar.
“Not as material bodies,” said the Curate.
“Anyhow, come and see him.”
“I don’t want to see your hallucinations,” began the Curate.
“I can’t explain anything unless you come and see him,” said the Vicar. “A man who’s
more like an angel than anything else in heaven or earth. You simply must see if you wish to
“I don’t wish to understand,” said the Curate. “I don’t wish to lend myself to any
imposture. Surely, Hilyer, if this is not an imposition, you can tell me yourself... Flamingo,
Chapter 16

The Angel had finished his tea and was standing looking pensively out of the window. He
thought the old church down the valley lit by the light of the setting sun was very beautiful, but
he could not understand the serried ranks of tombstones that lay up the hillside beyond. He
turned as Mendham and the Vicar came in.
Now Mendham could bully his Vicar cheerfully enough, just as he could bully his
congregation; but he was not the sort of man to bully a stranger. He looked at the Angel, and
the “strange woman” theory was disposed of. The Angel’s beauty was too clearly the beauty
of the youth.
“Mr. Hilyer tells me,” Mendham began, in an almost apologetic tone, “that you — ah —
it’s so curious — claim to be an Angel.”
“Are an Angel,” said the Vicar.
The Angel bowed.
“Naturally,” said Mendham, “we are curious.”
“Very,” said the Angel. “The blackness and the shape.”
“I beg your pardon?” said Mendham.
“The blackness and the flaps,” repeated the Angel; “and no wings.”
“Precisely,” said Mendham, who was altogether at a loss. “We are, of course, curious to
know something of how you came into the village in such a peculiar costume.”
The Angel looked at the Vicar. The Vicar touched his chin.
“You see,” began the Vicar.
“Let him explain,” said Mendham; “I beg.”
“I wanted to suggest,” began the Vicar.
“And I don’t want you to suggest.”
“Bother!” said the Vicar.
The Angel looked from one to the other. “Such rugose expressions flit across your
faces!” he said.
“You see, Mr. — Mr. — I don’t know your name,” said Mendham, with a certain
diminution of suavity. “The case stands thus: My wife — four ladies, I might say — are playing
lawn tennis, when you suddenly rush out on them, sir; you rush out on them from among the
rhododendra in a very defective costume. You and Mr. Hilyer.”
“But I—” said the Vicar.
“I know. It was this gentleman’s costume was defective. Naturally it is my place in fact to
demand an explanation.” His voice was growing in volume. “And I must demand an
The Angel smiled faintly at his note of anger and his sudden attitude of determination —
arms tightly folded.
“I am rather new to the world,” the Angel began.
“Nineteen at least,” said Mendham. “Old enough to know better. That’s a poor excuse.”
“May I ask one question first?” said the Angel.
“Do you think I am a Man like yourself? As the chequered man did.”
“If you are not a man —”
“One other question. Have you never heard of an Angel?”
“I warn you not to try that story upon me,” said Mendham, now back at his familiar
The Vicar interrupted: “But Mendham — he has wings!”“Please let me talk to him,” said Mendham.
“You are so quaint,” said the Angel; “you interrupt everything I have to say.”
“But what have you to say?” said Mendham.
“That I really am an Angel...”
“There you go!”
“But tell me, honestly, how you came to be in the shrubbery of Siddermorton Vicarage —
in the state in which you were. And in the Vicar’s company. Cannot you abandon this
ridiculous story of yours?...”
The Angel shrugged his wings. “What is the matter with this man?” he said to the Vicar.
“My dear Mendham,” said the Vicar, “a few words from me...”
“Surely my question is straightforward enough!”
“But you won’t tell me the answer you want, and it’s no good my telling you any other.”
“Pshaw!” said the Curate again. And then turning suddenly on the Vicar, “Where does he
come from?”
The Vicar was in a dreadful state of doubt by this time.
“He says he is an Angel!” said the Vicar. “Why don’t you listen to him?”
“No angel would alarm four ladies...”
“Is that what it is all about?” said the Angel.
“Enough cause too, I should think!” said the Curate.
“But I really did not know,” said the Angel.
“This is altogether too much!”
“I am sincerely sorry I alarmed these ladies.”
“You ought to be. But I see I shall get nothing out of you two.” Mendham went towards
the door.” I am convinced there is something discreditable at the bottom of this business. Or
why not tell a simple straightforward story? I will confess you puzzle me. Why, in this
enlightened age, you should tell this fantastic, this far-fetched story of an Angel, altogether
beats me. What good can it do?...”
“But stop and look at his wings!” said the Vicar. “I can assure you he has wings!”
Mendham had his fingers on the door-handle. “I have seen quite enough,” he said. “It
may be this is simply a foolish attempt at a hoax, Hilyer.”
“But Mendham!” said the Vicar.
The Curate halted in the doorway and looked at the Vicar over his shoulder. The
accumulating judgment of months found vent. “I cannot understand, Hilyer, why you are in the
Church. For the life of me I cannot. The air is full of Social Movements, of Economic change,
the Woman Movement, Rational Dress, The Reunion of Christendom, Socialism, Individualism
— all the great and moving Questions of the Hour! Surely, we who follow the Great
Reformer... And here you are stuffing birds, and startling ladies with your callous disregard...”
“But Mendham,” began the Vicar.
The Curate would not hear him. “You shame the Apostles with your levity... But this is
only a preliminary enquiry,” he said, with a threatening note in his sonorous voice, and so
vanished abruptly (with a violent slam) from the room.
Chapter 17

“Are all men so odd as this?” said the Angel.
“I’m in such a difficult position,” said the Vicar. “You see,” he said, and stopped,
searching his chin for an idea.
“I’m beginning to see,” said the Angel.
“They won’t believe it.”
“I see that.”
“They will think I tell lies.”
“That will be extremely painful to me.”
“Painful!... Pain,” said the Angel. “I hope not.”
The Vicar shook his head. The good report of the village had been the breath of his life,
so far. “You see,” he said, “it would look so much more plausible if you said you were just a
“But I’m not,” said the Angel.
“No, you’re not,” said the Vicar. “So that’s no good.”
“Nobody here, you know, has ever seen an Angel, or heard of one except in church. If
you had made your debut in the chancel — on Sunday — it might have been different. But
that’s too late now... (Bother!) Nobody, absolutely nobody, will believe in you.”
“I hope I am not inconveniencing you?”
“Not at all,” said the Vicar; “not at all. Only —. Naturally it may be inconvenient if you tell
a too incredible story. If I might suggest (ahem)—.”
“You see, people in the world, being men themselves, will almost certainly regard you as
a man. If you say you are not, they will simply say you do not tell the truth. Only exceptional
people appreciate the exceptional. When in Rome one must — well, respect Roman
prejudices a little — talk Latin. You will find it better —”
“You propose I should feign to become a man?”
“You have my meaning at once.”
The Angel stared at the Vicar’s hollyhocks and thought.
“Possibly, after all,” he said slowly, “I shall become a man. I may have been too hasty in
saying I was not. You say there are no angels in this world. Who am I to set myself up against
your experience? A mere thing of a day-so far as this world goes. If you say there are no
angels-clearly I must be something else. I eat-angels do not eat. I may be a man already.”
“A convenient view, at any rate,” said the Vicar.
“If it is convenient to you —”
“It is. And then to account for your presence here.”
“If,” said the Vicar, after a hesitating moment of reflection, “if, for instance, you had been
an ordinary man with a weakness for wading, and you had gone wading in the Sidder, and
your clothes had been stolen, for instance, and I had come upon you in that position of
inconvenience; the explanation I shall have to make to Mrs. Mendham — would be shorn at
least of the supernatural element. There is such a feeling against the supernatural element
nowadays — even in the pulpit. You would hardly believe —”
“It’s a pity that was not the case,” said the Angel.
“Of course,” said the Vicar. “It is a great pity that was not the case. But at any rate you
will oblige me if you do not obtrude your angelic nature. You will oblige everyone, in fact.
There is a settled opinion that angels do not do this kind of thing. And nothing is more painful-as I can testify-than a decaying settled opinion... Settled opinions are mental teeth in more
ways than one. For my own part,” — the Vicar’s hand passed over his eyes for a moment —
“I cannot but believe you are an angel... Surely I can believe my own eyes.”
“We always do ours,” said the Angel.
“And so do we, within limits.”
Then the clock upon the mantel chimed seven, and almost simultaneously Mrs. Hinijer
announced dinner.
Chapter 18 — After Dinner

The Angel and the Vicar sat at dinner. The Vicar, with his napkin tucked in at his neck,
watched the Angel struggling with his soup. “You will soon get into the way of it,” said the
Vicar. The knife and fork business was done awkwardly but with effect. The Angel looked
furtively at Delia, the little waiting maid. When presently they sat cracking nuts — which the
Angel found congenial enough — and the girl had gone, the Angel asked: “Was that a lady,
“Well,” said the Vicar (crack). “No she is not a lady. She is a servant.”
“Yes,” said the Angel; “she had rather a nicer shape.”
“You mustn’t tell Mrs. Mendham that,” said the Vicar, covertly satisfied.
“She didn’t stick out so much at the shoulders and hips, and there was more of her in
between. And the colour of her robes was not discordant — simply neutral. And her face —”
“Mrs. Mendham and her daughters had been playing tennis,” said the Vicar, feeling he
ought not to listen to detraction even of his mortal enemy. “Do you like these things — these
“Very much,” said the Angel. Crack.
“You see,” said the Vicar (Chum, chum, chum). “For my own part I entirely believe you
are an Angel.”
“Yes!” said the Angel.
“I shot you — I saw you flutter. It’s beyond dispute. In my own mind. I admit it’s curious
and against my preconceptions, but — practically — I’m assured, perfectly assured in fact,
that I saw what I certainly did see. But after the behaviour of these people. (Crack). I really
don’t see how we are to persuade people. Nowadays people are so very particular about
evidence. So that I think there is a great deal to be said for the attitude you assume.
Temporarily at least I think it would be best of you to do as you propose to do, and behave as
a man as far as possible. Of course there is no knowing how or when you may go back. After
what has happened (Gluck, gluck, gluck — as the Vicar refills his glass)— after what has
happened I should not be surprised to see the side of the room fall away, and the hosts of
heaven appear to take you away again take us both away even. You have so far enlarged my
imagination. All these years I have been forgetting Wonderland. But still — It will certainly be
wiser to break the thing gently to them.”
“This life of yours,” said the Angel. “I’m still in the dark about it. How do you begin?”
“Dear me!” said the Vicar. “Fancy having to explain that! We begin existence here, you
know, as babies, silly pink helpless things wrapped in white, with goggling eyes, that yelp
dismally at the Font. Then these babies grow larger and become even beautiful — when their
faces are washed. And they continue to grow to a certain size. They become children, boys
and girls, youths and maidens (Crack), young men and young women. That is the finest time
in life, according to many certainly the most beautiful. Full of great hopes and dreams, vague
emotions and unexpected dangers.”
“That was a maiden?” said the Angel, indicating the door through which Delia had
“Yes,” said the Vicar, “that was a maiden.” And paused thoughtfully.
“And then?”
“Then,” said the Vicar, “the glamour fades and life begins in earnest. The young men and
young women pair off-most of them. They come to me shy and bashful, in smart ugly
dresses, and I marry them. And then little pink babies come to them, and some of the youths
and maidens that were, grow fat and vulgar, and some grow thin and shrewish, and theirpretty complexions go, and they get a queer delusion of superiority over the younger people,
and all the delight and glory goes out of their lives. So they call the delight and glory of the
younger ones, Illusion. And then they begin to drop to pieces.”
“Drop to pieces!” said the Angel. “How grotesque!”
“Their hair comes off and gets dull coloured or ashen grey,” said the Vicar. “I, for
instance.” He bowed his head forward to show a circular shining patch the size of a florin.
“And their teeth come out. Their faces collapse and become as wrinkled and dry as a
shrivelled apple. ‘Corrugated’ you called mine. They care more and more for what they have
to eat and to drink, and less and less for any of the other delights of life. Their limbs get loose
in the joints, and their hearts slack, or little pieces from their lungs come coughing up. Pain...”
“Ah!” said the Angel.
“Pain comes into their lives more and more. And then they go. They do not like to go, but
they have to — out of this world, very reluctantly, clutching its pain at last in their eagerness to
“Where do they go?”
“Once I thought I knew. But now I am older I know I do not know. We have a Legend —
perhaps it is not a legend. One may be a churchman and disbelieve. Stokes says there is
nothing in it...” The Vicar shook his head at the bananas.
“And you?” said the Angel. “Were you a little pink baby?”
“A little while ago I was a little pink baby.”
“Were you robed then as you are now?”
“Oh no! Dear me! What a queer idea! Had long white clothes, I suppose, like the rest of
“And then you were a little boy?”
“A little boy.”
“And then a glorious youth?”
“I was not a very glorious youth, I am afraid. I was sickly, and too poor to be radiant, and
with a timid heart. I studied hard and pored over the dying thoughts of men long dead. So I
lost the glory, and no maiden came to me, and the dulness of life began too soon.”
“And you have your little pink babies?”
“None,” said the Vicar with a scarce perceptible pause. “Yet all the same, as you see, I
am beginning to drop to pieces. Presently my back will droop like a wilting flowerstalk. And
then, in a few thousand days more I shall be done with, and I shall go out of this world of
mine... Whither I do not know.”
“And you have to eat like this every day?”
“Eat, and get clothes and keep this roof above me. There are some very disagreeable
things in this world called Cold and Rain. And the other people here — how and why is too
long a story — have made me a kind of chorus to their lives. They bring their little pink babies
to me and I have to say a name and some other things over each new pink baby. And when
the children have grown to be youths and maidens, they come again and are confirmed. You
will understand that better later. Then before they may join in couples and have pink babies of
their own, they must come again and hear me read out of a book. They would be outcast, and
no other maiden would speak to the maiden who had a little pink baby without I had read over
her for twenty minutes out of my book. It’s a necessary thing, as you will see. Odd as it may
seem to you. And afterwards, when they are falling to pieces, I try and persuade them of a
strange world in which I scarcely believe myself, where life is altogether different from what
they have had — or desire. And in the end, I bury them, and read out of my book to those
who will presently follow into the unknown land. I stand at the beginning, and at the zenith,
and at the setting of their lives. And on every seventh day, I who am a man myself, I who see
no further than they do, talk to them of the Life to Come — the life of which we know nothing.
If such a life there be. And slowly I drop to pieces amidst my prophesying.”“What a strange life!” said the Angel.
“Yes,” said the Vicar. “What a strange life! But the thing that makes it strange to me is
new. I had taken it as a matter of course until you came into my life.
“This life of ours is so insistent,” said the Vicar. “It, and its petty needs, its temporary
pleasures (Crack) swathe our souls about. While I am preaching to these people of mine of
another life, some are ministering to one appetite and eating sweets, others — the old men —
are slumbering, the youths glance at the maidens, the grown men protrude white waistcoats
and gold chains, pomp and vanity on a substratum of carnal substance, their wives flaunt
garish bonnets at one another. And I go on droning away of the things unseen and unrealized.
‘Eye hath not seen,’ I read, ‘nor ear heard, nor hath it entered into the imagination of man to
conceive,’ and I look up to catch an adult male immortal admiring the fit of a pair of three and
sixpenny gloves. It is damping year after year. When I was ailing in my youth I felt almost the
assurance of vision that beneath this temporary phantasm world was the real world — the
enduring world of the Life Everlasting. But now —”
He glanced at his chubby white hand, fingering the stem of his glass. “I have put on flesh
since then,” he said. [Pause].
“I have changed and developed very much. The battle of the Flesh and Spirit does not
trouble me as it did. Every day I feel less confidence in my beliefs, and more in God. I live, I
am afraid, a quiescent life, duties fairly done, a little ornithology and a little chess, a trifle of
mathematical trifling. My times are in His hands —”
The Vicar sighed and became pensive. The Angel watched him, and the Angel’s eyes
were troubled with the puzzle of him. “Gluck, gluck, gluck,” went the decanter as the Vicar
refilled his glass.
Chapter 19

So the Angel dined and talked to the Vicar, and presently the night came and he was
overtaken by yawning.
“Yah — oh!” said the Angel suddenly. “Dear me! A higher power seemed suddenly to
stretch my mouth open and a great breath of air went rushing down my throat.”
“You yawned,” said the Vicar. “Do you never yawn in the angelic country?”
“Never,” said the Angel.
“And yet you are immortal! — I suppose you want to go to bed.”
“Bed!” said the Angel. “Where’s that?”
So the Vicar explained darkness to him and the art of going to bed. (The Angels, it
seems, sleep only in order to dream, and dream like primitive man with their foreheads on
their knees. And they sleep among the white poppy meadows in the heat of the day.) The
Angel found the bedroom arrangements quaint enough.
“Why is everything raised up on big wooden legs?” he said. “You have the floor, and then
you put everything you have upon a wooden quadruped. Why do you do it?” The Vicar
explained with philosophical vagueness. The Angel burnt his finger in the candle-flame — and
displayed an absolute ignorance of the elementary principles of combustion. He was merely
charmed when a line of fire ran up the curtains. The Vicar had to deliver a lecture on fire so
soon as the line was extinguished. He had all kinds of explanations to make — even the soap
needed explaining. It was an hour or more before the Angel was safely tucked in for the night.
“He’s very beautiful,” said the Vicar, descending the staircase, quite tired out; “and he’s a
real Angel no doubt. But I am afraid he will be a dreadful anxiety, all the same, before he gets
into our earthly way with things.”
He seemed quite worried. He helped himself to an extra glass of sherry before he put
away the wine in the cellaret.
Chapter 20

The Curate stood in front of the looking-glass and solemnly divested himself of his collar.
“I never heard a more fantastic story,” said Mrs. Mendham from the basket chair. “The
man must be mad. Are you sure —”
“Perfectly, my dear. I’ve told you every word, every incident —”
“Well!” said Mrs. Mendham, and spread her hands. “There’s no sense in it.”
“Precisely, my dear.”
“The Vicar,” said Mrs. Mendham, “must be mad.”
“This hunchback is certainly one of the strangest creatures I’ve seen for a long time.
Foreign looking, with a big bright-coloured face and long brown hair... It can’t have been cut
for months!” The Curate put his studs carefully upon the shelf of the dressing-table. “And a
kind of staring look about his eyes, and a simpering smile. Quite a silly looking person.
“But who can he be?” said Mrs. Mendham.
“I can’t imagine, my dear. Nor where he came from. He might be a chorister or
something of that sort.”
“But why should he be about the shrubbery... in that dreadful costume?”
“I don’t know. The Vicar gave me no explanation. He simply said, ‘Mendham, this is an
“I wonder if he drinks... They may have been bathing near the spring, of course,”
reflected Mrs. Mendham. “But I noticed no other clothes on his arm.”
The Curate sat down on his bed and unlaced his boots.
“It’s a perfect mystery to me, my dear.” (Flick, flick of laces.) “Hallucination is the only
charitable —”
“You are sure, George, that it was not a woman.”
“Perfectly,” said the Curate.
“I know what men are, of course.”
“It was a young man of nineteen or twenty,” said the Curate.
“I can’t understand it,” said Mrs. Mendham. “You say the creature is staying at the
“Hilyer is simply mad,” said the Curate. He got up and went padding round the room to
the door to put out his boots. “To judge by his manner you would really think he believed this
cripple was an Angel.” (“Are your shoes out, dear?”)
(“They’re just by the wardrobe”), said Mrs. Mendham. “He always was a little queer, you
know. There was always something childish about him... An Angel!”
The Curate came and stood by the fire, fumbling with his braces. Mrs. Mendham liked a
fire even in the summer. “He shirks all the serious problems in life and is always trifling with
some new foolishness,” said the Curate. “Angel indeed!” He laughed suddenly. “Hilyer must be
mad,” he said.
Mrs. Mendham laughed too. “Even that doesn’t explain the hunchback,” she said.
“The hunchback must be mad too,’ said the Curate.
“It’s the only way of explaining it in a sensible way,” said Mrs. Mendham. [Pause.]
“Angel or no Angel,” said Mrs. Mendham, “I know what is due to me. Even supposing the
man thought he was in the company of an Angel, that is no reason why he should not behave
like a gentleman.”
“That is perfectly true.”
“You will write to the Bishop, of course?”Mendham coughed. “No, I shan’t write to the Bishop,” said Mendham. “I think it seems a
little disloyal... And he took no notice of the last, you know.”
“But surely —”
“I shall write to Austin. In confidence. He will be sure to tell the Bishop, you know. And
you must remember, my dear —”
“That Hilyer can dismiss you, you were going to say. My dear, the man’s much too weak!
I should have a word to say about that. And besides, you do all his work for him. Practically,
we manage the parish from end to end. I do not know what would become of the poor if it was
not for me. They’d have free quarters in the Vicarage to-morrow. There is that Goody Ansell
“I know, my dear,” said the Curate, turning away and proceeding with his undressing.
“You were telling me about her only this afternoon.”
Chapter 21

And thus in the little bedroom over the gable we reach a first resting place in this story.
And as we have been hard at it, getting our story spread out before you, it may be perhaps
well to recapitulate a little.
Looking back you will see that much has been done; we began with a blaze of light “not
uniform but broken all over by curving flashes like the waving of swords,” and the sound of a
mighty harping, and the advent of an Angel with polychromatic wings.
Swiftly, dexterously, as the reader must admit, wings have been clipped, halo handled
off, the glory clapped into coat and trousers, and the Angel made for all practical purposes a
man, under a suspicion of being either a lunatic or an impostor. You have heard too, or at
least been able to judge, what the Vicar and the Doctor and the Curate’s wife thought of the
strange arrival. And further remarkable opinions are to follow.
The afterglow of the summer sunset in the northwest darkens into night and the Angel
sleeps, dreaming himself back in the wonderful world where it is always light, and everyone is
happy, where fire does not burn and ice does not chill; where rivulets of starlight go streaming
through the amaranthine meadows, out to the seas of Peace. He dreams, and it seems to him
that once more his wings glow with a thousand colours and flash through the crystal air of the
world from which he has come.
So he dreams. But the Vicar lies awake, too perplexed for dreaming. Chiefly he is
troubled by the possibilities of Mrs. Mendham; but the evening’s talk has opened a kind of
window in his mind, and he is also stimulated by a sense as of something seen darkly through
a veiled window, of a hitherto unsuspected wonderland lying about his world. For twenty years
now he has held his village living and lived his daily life, protected by his familiar creed, by the
clamour of the details of life, from any mystical dreaming. But now interweaving with the
familiar bother of his persecuting neighbour, is an altogether unfamiliar sense of strange new
There was something ominous in the feeling. Once, indeed, it rose above all other
considerations, and in a kind of terror he blundered out of bed, bruised his shins very
convincingly, found the matches at last, and lit a candle to assure himself of the reality of his
own customary world again. But on the whole the more tangible trouble was the Mendham
avalanche. Her tongue seemed to be hanging above him like the sword of Damocles. What
might she not say of this business, before her indignant imagination came to rest?
And while the successful captor of the Strange Bird was sleeping thus uneasily, Gully of
Sidderton was carefully unloading his gun after a wearisome blank day, and Sandy Bright was
on his knees in prayer, with the window carefully fastened. Annie Durgan was sleeping hard
with her mouth open, and Amory’s mother was dreaming of washing, and both of them had
long since exhausted the topics of the Sound and the Glare. Lumpy Durgan was sitting up in
his bed, now crooning the fragment of a tune and now listening intently for a sound he had
heard once and longed to hear again. As for the solicitor’s clerk at Iping Hanger, he was trying
to write poetry about a confectioner’s girl at Portburdock, and the Strange Bird was quite out
of his head. But the ploughman who had seen it on the confines of Siddermorton Park had a
black eye. That had been one of the more tangible consequences of a little argument about
birds’ legs in the “Ship.” It is worthy of this passing mention, since it is probably the only
known instance of an Angel causing anything of the kind.
Chapter 22 — Morning

The Vicar going to call the Angel, found him dressed and leaning out of his window. It
was a glorious morning, still dewy, and the rising sunlight slanting round the corner of the
house struck warm and yellow upon the hillside. The birds were astir in the hedges and
shrubbery. Up the hillside — for it was late in August — a plough drove slowly. The Angel’s
chin rested upon his hands and he did not turn as the Vicar came up to him.
“How’s the wing?” said the Vicar.
“I’d forgotten it,” said the Angel. “Is that yonder a man?”
The Vicar looked. “That’s a ploughman.”
“Why does he go to and fro like that? Does it amuse him?”
“He’s ploughing. That’s his work.”
“Work! Why does he do it? It seems a monotonous thing to do.”
“It is,” admitted the Vicar. “But he has to do it to get a living, you know. To get food to
eat and all that kind of thing.”
“How curious!” said the Angel. “Do all men have to do that? Do you?”
“Oh, no. He does it for me; does my share.”
“Why?” asked the Angel.
“Oh! in return for things I do for him, you know. We go in for division of labour in this
world. Exchange is no robbery.”
“I see,” said the Angel, with his eyes still on the ploughman’s heavy movements.
“What do you do for him?”
“That seems an easy question to you,” said the Vicar, “but really! — it’s difficult. Our
social arrangements are rather complicated. It’s impossible to explain these things all at once,
before breakfast. Don’t you feel hungry?”
“I think I do,” said the Angel slowly, still at the window; and then abruptly, “Somehow I
can’t help thinking that ploughing must be far from enjoyable.”
“Possibly,” said the Vicar, “very possibly. But breakfast is ready. Won’t you come down?”
The Angel left the window reluctantly.
“Our society,” explains the Vicar on the stair-case, “is a complicated organisation.”
“And it is so arranged that some do one thing and some another.”
“And that lean, bent old man trudges after that heavy blade of iron pulled by a couple of
horses while we go down to eat?”
“Yes. You will find it is perfectly just. Ah! mushrooms and poached eggs! It’s the Social
System. Pray be seated. Possibly it strikes you as unfair.”
“I’m puzzled,” said the Angel.
“The drink I’m sending you is called coffee,” said the Vicar. “I daresay you are. When I
was a young man I was puzzled in the same way. But afterwards comes a Broader View of
Things. (These black things are called mushrooms; they look beautiful.) Other Considerations.
All men are brothers, of course, but some are younger brothers, so to speak. There is work
that requires culture and refinement, and work in which culture and refinement would be an
impediment. And the rights of property must not be forgotten. One must render unto Caesar...
Do you know, instead of explaining this matter now (this is yours), I think I will lend you a little
book to read (chum, chum, chum — these mushrooms are well up to their appearance),
which sets the whole thing out very clearly.”
Chapter 23 — The Violin

After breakfast the Vicar went into the little room next his study to find a book on Political
Economy for the Angel to read. For the Angel’s social ignorances were clearly beyond any
verbal explanations. The door stood ajar.
“What is that?” said the Angel, following him. “A violin!” He took it down.
“You play?” said the Vicar.
The Angel had the bow in his hand, and by way of answer drove it across the strings.
The quality of the note made the Vicar turn suddenly.
The Angel’s hand tightened on the instrument. The bow flew back and flickered, and an
air the Vicar had never heard before danced in his ears. The Angel shifted the fiddle under his
dainty chin and went on playing, and as he played his eyes grew bright and his lips smiled. At
first he looked at the Vicar, then his expression became abstracted. He seemed no longer to
look at the Vicar, but through him, at something beyond, something in his memory or his
imagination, something infinitely remote, undreamt of hitherto...
The Vicar tried to follow the music. The air reminded him of a flame, it rushed up, shone,
flickered and danced, passed and reappeared. No! — it did not reappear! Another air — like it
and unlike it, shot up after it, wavered, vanished. Then another, the same and not the same. It
reminded him of the flaring tongues that palpitate and change above a newly lit fire. There are
two airs — or motifs, which is it? — thought the Vicar. He knew remarkably little of musical
technique. They go dancing up, one pursuing the other, out of the fire of the incantation,
pursuing, fluctuating, turning, up into the sky. There below was the fire burning, a flame
without fuel upon a level space, and there two flirting butterflies of sound, dancing away from
it, up, one over another, swift, abrupt, uncertain.
“Flirting butterflies were they!” What was the Vicar thinking of? Where was he? In the
little room next to his study, of course! And the Angel standing in front of him smiling into his
face, playing the violin, and looking through him as though he was only a window —. That
motif again, a yellow flare, spread fanlike by a gust, and now one, then with a swift eddying
upward flight the other, the two things of fire and light pursuing one another again up into that
clear immensity.
The study and the realities of life suddenly faded out of the Vicar’s eyes, grew thinner
and thinner like a mist that dissolves into air, and he and the Angel stood together on a
pinnacle of wrought music, about which glittering melodies circled, and vanished, and
reappeared. He was in the land of Beauty, and once more the glory of heaven was upon the
Angel’s face, and the glowing delights of colour pulsated in his wings. Himself the Vicar could
not see. But I cannot tell you of the vision of that great and spacious land, of its incredible
openness, and height, and nobility. For there is no space there like ours, no time as we know
it; one must needs speak by burgling metaphors and own in bitterness after all that one has
failed. And it was only a vision. The wonderful creatures flying through the aether saw them
not as they stood there, flew through them as one might pass through a whisp of mist. The
Vicar lost all sense of duration, all sense of necessity —
“Ah!” said the Angel, suddenly putting down the fiddle.
The Vicar had forgotten the book on Political Economy, had forgotten everything until the
Angel had done. For a minute he sat quite still. Then he woke up with a start. He was sitting
on the old iron-bound chest.
“Really,” he said slowly, “you are very clever.”
He looked about him in a puzzled way. “I had a kind of vision while you were playing. I
seemed to see —. What did I see? It has gone.”He stood up with a dazzled expression upon his face. “I shall never play the violin again,”
he said. “I wish you would take it to your room-and keep it —. And play to me again. I did not
know anything of music until I heard you play. I do not feel as though I had ever heard any
music before.”
He stared at the Angel, then about him at the room. “I have never felt anything of this
kind with music before,” he said. He shook his head. “I shall never play again.”
Chapter 24 — The Angel Explores the Village

Very unwisely, as I think, the Vicar allowed the Angel to go down into the village by
himself, to enlarge his ideas of humanity. Unwisely, because how was he to imagine the
reception the Angel would receive? Not thoughtlessly, I am afraid. He had always carried
himself with decorum in the village, and the idea of a slow procession through the main street
with all the inevitable curious remarks, explanations, pointings, was too much for him. The
Angel might do the strangest things, the village was certain to think them. Peering faces.
“Who’s he got now?”. Besides, was it not his duty to prepare his sermon in good time? The
Angel, duly directed, went down cheerfully by himself — still innocent of most of the
peculiarities of the human as distinguished from the angelic turn of mind.
The Angel walked slowly, his white hands folded behind his hunched back, his sweet face
looking this way and that. He peered curiously into the eyes of the people he met. A little child
picking a bunch of vetch and honeysuckle looked in his face, and forthwith came and put them
in his hand. It was about the only kindness he had from a human being (saving only the Vicar
and one other). He heard Mother Gustick scolding that granddaughter of hers as he passed
the door. “You Brazen Faggit-you!” said Mother Gustick. “You Trumpery Baggage!”
The Angel stopped, startled at the strange sounds of Mother Gustick’s voice. “Put yer
best clo’es on, and yer feather in yer ‘at, and off you goes to meet en, fal lal, and me at ‘ome
slaving for ye. ‘Tis a Fancy Lady you’ll be wantin’ to be, my gal, a walkin’ Touch and Go, with
yer idleness and finery —”
The voice ceased abruptly, and a great peace came upon the battered air. “Most
grotesque and strange!” said the Angel, still surveying this wonderful box of discords. “Walking
Touch and Go!” He did not know that Mrs. Gustick had suddenly become aware of his
existence, and was scrutinising his appearance through the window-blind. Abruptly the door
flew open, and she stared out into the Angel’s face. A strange apparition, grey and dusty hair,
and the dirty pink dress unhooked to show the stringy throat, a discoloured gargoyle,
presently to begin spouting incomprehensible abuse.
“Now, then, Mister,” began Mrs. Gustick. “Have ye nothin’ better to do than listen at
people’s doors for what you can pick up?”
The Angel stared at her in astonishment.
“D’year!” said Mrs. Gustick, evidently very angry indeed. “Listenin’.”
“Have you any objection to my hearing...”
“Object to my hearing! Course I have! Whad yer think? You ain’t such a Ninny...”
“But if ye didn’t want me to hear, why did you cry out so loud? I thought...”
“You thought! Softie-that’s what you are! You silly girt staring Gaby, what don’t know any
better than to come holding yer girt mouth wide open for all that you can catch holt on? And
then off up there to tell! You great Fat-Faced, Tale-Bearin’ Silly-Billy! I’d be ashamed to come
poking and peering round quiet people’s houses...”
The Angel was surprised to find that some inexplicable quality in her voice excited the
most disagreeable sensations in him and a strong desire to withdraw. But, resisting this, he
stood listening politely (as the custom is in the Angelic Land, so long as anyone is speaking).
The entire eruption was beyond his comprehension. He could not perceive any reason for the
sudden projection of this vituperative head, out of infinity, so to speak. And questions without
a break for an answer were outside his experience altogether.
Mrs. Gustick proceeded with her characteristic fluency, assured him he was no
gentleman, enquired if he called himself one, remarked that every tramp did as much
nowadays, compared him to a Stuck Pig, marvelled at his impudence, asked him if he wasn’tashamed of himself standing there, enquired if he was rooted to the ground, was curious to be
told what he meant by it, wanted to know whether he robbed a scarecrow for his clothes,
suggested that an abnormal vanity prompted his behaviour, enquired if his mother knew he
was out, and finally remarking, “I got somethin’ll move you, my gentleman,” disappeared with
a ferocious slamming of the door.
The interval struck the Angel as singularly peaceful. His whirling mind had time to analyse
his sensations. He ceased bowing and smiling, and stood merely astonished.
“This is a curious painful feeling,” said the Angel. “Almost worse than Hungry, and quite
different. When one is hungry one wants to eat. I suppose she was a woman. Here one wants
to get away. I suppose I might just as well go.”
He turned slowly and went down the road meditating. He heard the cottage door reopen,
and turning his head, saw through intervening scarlet runners Mrs. Gustick with a steaming
saucepan full of boiling cabbage water in her hand.
“‘Tis well you went, Mister Stolen Breeches,” came the voice of Mrs. Gustick floating
down through the vermilion blossoms. “Don’t you come peeping and prying round this yer
cottage again or I’ll learn ye manners, I will!”
The Angel stood in a state of considerable perplexity. He had no desire to come within
earshot of the cottage again ever. He did not understand the precise import of the black pot,
but his general impression was entirely disagreeable. There was no explaining it.
“I mean it!” said Mrs. Gustick, crescendo. “Drat it! I mean it.”
The Angel turned and went on, a dazzled look in his eyes.
“She was very grotesque!” said the Angel. “Very. Much more than the little man in black.
And she means it. — But what she means I don’t know!...” He became silent. “I suppose they
all mean something,” he said, presently, still perplexed.
Chapter 25

Then the Angel came in sight of the forge, where Sandy Bright’s brother was shoeing a
horse for the carter from Upmorton. Two hobbledehoys were standing by the forge staring in
a bovine way at the proceedings. As the Angel approached these two and then the carter
turned slowly through an angle of thirty degrees and watched his approach, staring quietly and
steadily at him. The expression on their faces was one of abstract interest.
The Angel became self-conscious for the first time in his life. He drew nearer, trying to
maintain an amiable expression on his face, an expression that beat in vain against their
granitic stare. His hands were behind him. He smiled pleasantly, looking curiously at the (to
him) incomprehensible employment of the smith. But the battery of eyes seemed to angle for
his regard. Trying to meet the three pairs at once, the Angel lost his alertness and stumbled
over a stone. One of the yokels gave a sarcastic cough, and was immediately covered with
confusion at the Angel’s enquiring gaze, nudging his companion with his elbow to cover his
disorder. None spoke, and the Angel did not speak.
So soon as the Angel had passed, one of the three hummed this tune in an aggressive
Then all three of them laughed. One tried to sing something and found his throat
contained phlegm. The Angel proceeded on his way.
“Who’s e then?” said the second hobbledehoy.
“Ping, ping, ping,” went the blacksmith’s hammer.
“Spose he’s one of these here foweners,” said the carter from Upmorton. “Däamned silly
fool he do look to be sure.”
“Tas the way with them foweners,” said the first hobbledehoy sagely.
“Got something very like the ‘ump,” said the carter from Upmorton. “Dää-ä-ämned if ‘E
Then the silence healed again, and they resumed their quiet expressionless
consideration of the Angel’s retreating figure.
“Very like the ‘ump et is,” said the carter after an enormous pause.
Chapter 26

The Angel went on through the village, finding it all wonderful enough. “They begin, and
just a little while and then they end,” he said to himself in a puzzled voice. “But what are they
doing meanwhile?” Once he heard some invisible mouth chant inaudible words to the tune the
man at the forge had hummed.
“That’s the poor creature the Vicar shot with that great gun of his,” said Sarah Glue (of 1,
Church Cottages), peering over the blind.
“He looks Frenchified,” said Susan Hopper, peering through the interstices of that
convenient veil on curiosity.
“He has sweet eyes,” said Sarah Glue, who had met them for a moment.
The Angel sauntered on. The postman passed him and touched his hat to him; further
down was a dog asleep in the sun. He went on and saw Mendham, who nodded distantly and
hurried past. (The Curate did not care to be seen talking to an Angel in the village, until more
was known about him.) There came from one of the houses the sound of a child screaming in
a passion, that brought a puzzled look to the Angelic face. Then the Angel reached the bridge
below the last of the houses, and stood leaning over the parapet watching the glittering little
cascade from the mill.
“They begin, and just a little while, and then they end,” said the weir from the mill. The
water raced under the bridge, green and dark, and streaked with foam.
Beyond the mill rose the square tower of the church, with the churchyard behind it, a
spray of tombstones and wooden headboards splashed up the hillside. A half dozen of beech
trees framed the picture.
Then the Angel heard a shuffling of feet and the gride of wheels behind him, and turning
his head saw a man dressed in dirty brown rags and a felt hat grey with dust, who was
standing with a slight swaying motion and fixedly regarding the Angelic back. Beyond him was
another almost equally dirty, pushing a knife grinder’s barrow over the bridge.
“Mornin’,” said the first person smiling weakly. “Goomorn’.” He arrested an escaping
The Angel stared at him. He had never seen a really fatuous smile before. “Who are
you?” said the Angel.
The fatuous smile faded. “No your business whoaaam. Wishergoomorn.”
“Carm on:” said the man with the grindstone, passing on his way.
“Wishergoomorn,” said the dirty man, in a tone of extreme aggravation. “Carncher
“Carm on you fool!” said the man with the grindstone receding.
“I don’t understand,” said the Angel.
“Donunderstan’. Sim’l enough. Wishergoomorn’. Willyanswerme? Wontchr?
gemwishergem goomorn. Cusom answer goomorn. No gem. Haverteachyer.”
The Angel was puzzled. The drunken man stood swaying for a moment, then he made
an unsteady snatch at his hat and threw it down at the Angel’s feet. “Ver well,” he said, as one
who decides great issues.
“Carm on!” said the voice of the man with the grindstone stopping perhaps twenty yards
“You wan fight, you —” the Angel failed to catch the word. “I’ll show yer, not answer
gem’s goomorn.”
He began to struggle with his jacket. “Think I’m drun,” he said, “I show yer.” The man
with the grindstone sat down on the shaft to watch. “Carm on,” he said. The jacket wasintricate, and the drunken man began to struggle about the road, in his attempts to extricate
himself, breathing threatenings and slaughter. Slowly the Angel began to suspect remotely
enough, that these demonstrations were hostile. “Mur wun know yer when I done wi’ yer,” said
the drunken man, coat almost over his head.
At last the garment lay on the ground, and through the frequent interstices of his
reminiscences of a waistcoat, the drunken tinker displayed a fine hairy and muscular body to
the Angel’s observant eyes. He squared up in masterly fashion.
“Take the paint off yer,” he remarked, advancing and receding, fists up and elbows out.
“Carm on,” floated down the road.
The Angel’s attention was concentrated on two huge hairy black fists, that swayed and
advanced and retreated. “Come on d’yer say? I’ll show yer,” said the gentleman in rags, and
then with extraordinary ferocity: “My crikey! I’ll show yer.”
Suddenly he lurched forward, and with a new-born instinct and raising a defensive arm
as he did so, the Angel stepped aside to avoid him. The fist missed the Angelic shoulder by a
hairsbreadth, and the tinker collapsed in a heap with his face against the parapet of the
bridge. The Angel hesitated over the writhing dusty heap of blasphemy for a moment, and
then turned towards the man’s companion up the road. “Lemmeget up,” said the man on the
bridge. “Lemmeget up, you swine. I’ll show yer.”
A strange disgust, a quivering repulsion came upon the Angel. He walked slowly away
from the drunkard towards the man with the grindstone.
“What does it all mean?” said the Angel. “I don’t understand it.”
“Dam fool!... says it’s ‘is silver weddin’,” answered the man with the grindstone, evidently
much annoyed; and then, in a tone of growing impatience, he called down the road once
more: “Carm on!”
“Silver wedding!” said the Angel. “What is a silver wedding?”
“Jest is rot,” said the man on the barrow. “But E’s always avin’ some ‘scuse like that. Fair
sickenin’ it is. Lars week it wus ‘is bloomin’ birthday, and then ‘e ad’nt ardly got sober orf a
comlimentary drunk to my noo barrer. (Carm on, you fool.)”
“But I don’t understand,” said the Angel. “Why does he sway about so? Why does he
keep on trying to pick up his hat like that — and missing it?”
“Why!” said the tinker. “Well this is a blasted innocent country! Why! Because ‘E’s blind!
Wot else? (Carm on-Dam yer.) Because ‘E’s just as full as ‘E can ‘old. That’s why!”
The Angel noticing the tone of the second tinker’s voice, judged it wiser not to question
him further. But he stood by the grindstone and continued to watch the mysterious evolutions
on the bridge.
“Carm on! I shall ‘ave to go and pick up that ‘at I suppose... ‘E’s always at it. I ne’er ‘ad
such a blooming pard before. Always at it, ‘e is.”
The man with the barrow meditated. “Taint as if ‘e was a gentleman and ‘adnt no livin’ to
get. An’ ‘e’s such a reckless fool when ‘e gets a bit on. Goes offerin out everyone ‘e meets.
(There you go!) I’m blessed if ‘e didn’t offer out a ‘ole bloomin’ Salvation Army. No judgment in
it. (Oh! Carm on! Carm on!) ‘Ave to go and pick this bloomin’ ‘at up now I s’pose. ‘E don’t care
wot trouble ‘e gives.”
The Angel watched the second tinker walk back, and, with affectionate blasphemy, assist
the first to his hat and his coat. Then he turned, absolutely mystified, towards the village
Chapter 27

After that incident the Angel walked along past the mill and round behind the church, to
examine the tombstones.
“This seems to be the place where they put the broken pieces,” said the Angel reading
the inscriptions. “Curious word — relict! Kesurgam! Then they are not done with quite. What a
huge pile it requires to keep her down!... It is spirited of her.”
“Hawkins?” said the Angel softly...”Hawkins? The name is strange to me... He did not die
then... It is plain enough — Joined the Angelic Hosts, May 17, 1863. He must have felt as
much out of place as I do down here. But I wonder why they put that little pot thing on the top
of this monument. Curious! There are several others about-little stone pots with a rag of stiff
stone drapery over them.”
Just then the boys came pouring out of the National School, and first one and then
several stopped agape at the Angel’s crooked black figure among the white tombs. “Ent ‘e
gart a bääk on en!” remarked one critic.
“‘E’s got ‘air like a girl!” said another.
The Angel turned towards them. He was struck by the queer little heads sticking up over
the lichenous wall. He smiled faintly at their staring faces, and then turned to marvel at the
iron railings that enclosed the Fitz-Jarvis tomb. “A queer air of uncertainty,” he said. “Slabs,
piles of stone, these railings... Are they afraid?... Do these Dead ever try and get up again?
There’s an air of repression-fortification —”
“Get yer ‘air cut, Get yer ‘air cut,” sang three little boys together.
“Curious these Human Beings are!” said the Angel. “That man yesterday wanted to cut
off my wings, now these little creatures want me to cut off my hair! And the man on the bridge
pffered to take the ‘paint’ off of me. They will leave nothing of me soon.”
“Where did you get that ‘at?” sang another little boy. “Where did you get them clo’es?”
“They ask questions that they evidently do not want answered,” said the Angel. “I can tell
from the tone.” He looked thoughtfully at the little boys. “I don’t understand the methods of
Human intercourse. These are probably friendly advances, a kind of ritual. But I don’t know
the responses. I think I will go back to the little fat man in black, with the gold chain across his
stomach, and ask him to explain. It is difficult.”
He turned towards the lych gate. “Oh!” said one of the little boys, in a shrill falsetto, and
threw a beechnut husk. It came bounding across the churchyard path. The Angel stopped in
This made all the little boys laugh. A second imitating the first, said “Oh!” and hit the
Angel. His astonishment was really delicious. They all began crying “Oh!” and throwing
beechnut husks. One hit the Angel’s hand, another stung him smartly by the ear. The Angel
made ungainly movements towards them. He spluttered some expostulation and made for the
roadway. The little boys were amazed and shocked at his discomfiture and cowardice. Such
sawney behaviour could not be encouraged. The pelting grew vigorously. You may perhaps be
able to imagine those vivid moments, daring small boys running in close and delivering shots,
milder small boys rushing round behind with flying discharges, Milton Screever’s mongrel dog
was roused to yelping ecstacy at the sight, and danced (full of wild imaginings) nearer and
nearer to the Angelic legs.
“Hi, hi!” said a vigorous voice. “I never did! Where’s Mr. Jarvis? Manners, manners! you
young rascals.”
The youngsters scattered right and left, some over the wall into the playground, some
down the street.“Frightful pest these boys are getting!” said Crump, coming up. “I’m sorry they have been
annoying you.”
The Angel seemed quite upset. “I don’t understand,” he said. “These Human ways...”
“Yes, of course. Unusual to you. How’s your excrescence?”
“My what?” said the Angel.
“Bifid limb, you know. How is it? Now you’re down this way, come in. Come in and let me
have a look at it again. You young roughs! And meanwhile these little louts of ours will be
getting off home. They’re all alike in these villages. Can’t understand anything abnormal. See
an odd-looking stranger. Chuck a stone. No imagination beyond the parish... (I’ll give you
physic if I catch you annoying strangers again.)... I suppose it’s what one might expect...
Come along this way.”
So the Angel, horribly perplexed still, was hurried into the surgery to have his wound
Chapter 28 — Lady Hammergallow’s View

In Siddermorton Park is Siddermorton House, where old Lady Hammergallow lives,
chiefly upon Burgundy and the little scandals of the village, a dear old lady with a ropy neck, a
ruddled countenance and spasmodic gusts of odd temper, whose three remedies for all
human trouble among her dependents are, a bottle of gin, a pair of charity blankets, or a new
crown piece. The House is a mile-and-a-half out of Siddermorton. Almost all the village is
hers, saving a fringe to the south which belongs to Sir John Gotch, and she rules it with an
autocratic rule, refreshing in these days of divided government. She orders and forbids
marriages, drives objectionable people out of the village by the simple expedient of raising
their rent, dismisses labourers, obliges heretics to go to church, and made Susan Dangett,
who wanted to call her little girl “Euphemia,” have the infant christened “Mary-Anne.” She is a
sturdy Broad Protestant and disapproves of the Vicar’s going bald like a tonsure. She is on the
Village Council, which obsequiously trudges up the hill and over the moor to her, and (as she
is a trifle deaf) speaks all its speeches into her speaking trumpet instead of a rostrum. She
takes no interest now in politics, but until last year she was an active enemy of “that
Gladstone.” She has parlour maids instead of footmen to do her waiting, because of Hockley,
the American stockbroker, and his four Titans in plush.
She exercises what is almost a fascination upon the village. If in the bar-parlour of the
Cat and Cornucopia you swear by God no one would be shocked, but if you swore by Lady
Harnmergallow they would probably be shocked enough to turn you out of the room. When
she drives through Siddermorton she always calls upon Bessy Flump, the post-mistress, to
hear all that has happened, and then upon Miss Finch, the dressmaker, to check back Bessy
Flump. Sometimes she calls upon the Vicar, sometimes upon Mrs. Mendham whom she
snubs, and even sometimes on Crump. Her sparkling pair of greys almost ran over the Angel
as he was walking down to the village.
“So that’s the genius!” said Lady Hammergallow, and turned and looked at him through
the gilt glasses on a stick that she always carried in her shrivelled and shaky hand. “Lunatic
indeed! The poor creature has rather a pretty face. I’m sorry I’ve missed him.”
But she went on to the vicarage nevertheless, and demanded news of it all. The
conflicting accounts of Miss Flump, Miss Finch, Mrs. Mendham, Crump, and Mrs. Jehoram
had puzzled her immensely. The Vicar, hard pressed, did all he could to say into her speaking
trumpet what had really happened. He toned down the wings and the saffron robe. But he felt
the case was hopeless. He spoke of his protégé as “Mr.” Angel. He addressed pathetic asides
to the kingfisher. The old lady noticed his confusion. Her queer old head went jerking
backwards and forwards, now the speaking trumpet in his face when he had nothing to say,
then the shrunken eyes peering at him, oblivious of the explanation that was coming from his
lips. A great many Ohs! and Ahs! She caught some fragments certainly.
“You have asked him to stop with you-indefinitely?” said Lady Hammergallow with a
Great Idea taking shape rapidly in her mind.
“I did-perhaps inadvertently make such —”
“And you don’t know where he comes from?”
“Not at all.”
“Nor who his father is, I suppose?” said Lady Hammergallow mysteriously.
“No,” said the Vicar.
“Now!” said Lady Hammergallow archly, and keeping her glasses to her eye, she
suddenly dug at his ribs with her trumpet.
“My dear Lady Hammergallow!”“I thought so. Don’t think I would blame you, Mr. Hilyer.” She gave a corrupt laugh that
she delighted in. “The world is the world, and men are men. And the poor boy’s a cripple, eh?
A kind of judgment. In mourning, I noticed. It reminds me of the Scarlet Letter. The mother’s
dead, I suppose. It’s just as well. Really — I’m not a narrow woman — I respect you for
having him. Really I do.”
“But, Lady Hammergallow!”
“Don’t spoil everything by denying it. It is so very, very plain, to a woman of the world.
That Mrs. Mendham! She amuses me with her suspicions. Such odd ideas! In a Curate’s wife.
But I hope it didn’t happen when you were in orders.”
“Lady Hammergallow, I protest. Upon my word.”
“Mr. Hilyer, I protest. I know. Not anything you can say will alter my opinion one jot. Don’t
try. I never suspected you were nearly such an interesting man.”
“But this suspicion is unendurable!”
“We will help him together, Mr. Hilyer. You may rely upon me. It is most romantic.” She
beamed benevolence.
“But, Lady Hammergallow, I must speak!”
She gripped her ear-trumpet resolutely, and held it before her and shook her head.
“He has quite a genius for music, Vicar, so I hear?”
“I can assure you most solemnly —”
“I thought so. And being a cripple —”
“You are under a most cruel —”
“I thought that if his gift is really what that Jehoram woman says.”
“An unjustifiable suspicion that ever a man —”
(“I don’t think much on her judgment, of course.”)
“Consider my position. Have I gained no character?”
“It might be possible to do something for him as a performer.”
“Have I — (Bother! It’s no good!)”
“And so, dear Vicar, I propose to give him an opportunity of showing us what he can do. I
have been thinking it all over as I drove here. On Tuesday next, I will invite just a few people
of taste, and he shall bring his violin. Eigh? And if that goes well, I will see if I can get some
introductions and really push him.”
“But Lady, Lady Hammergallow.”
“Not another word!” said Lady Hammergallow, still resolutely holding her speaking
trumpet before her and clutching her eyeglasses. “I really must not leave those horses. Cutler
is so annoyed if I keep them too long. He finds waiting tedious, poor man, unless there is a
public-house near.” She made for the door.
“Damn!” said the Vicar, under his breath. He had never used the word since he had
taken orders. It shows you how an Angel’s visit may disorganise a man.
He stood under the verandah watching the carriage drive away. The world seemed
coming to pieces about him. Had he lived a virtuous celibate life for thirty odd years in vain?
The things of which these people thought him capable! He stood and stared at the green
cornfield opposite, and down at the straggling village. It seemed real enough. And yet for the
first time in his life there was a queer doubt of its reality. He rubbed his chin, then turned and
went slowly upstairs to his dressing-room, and sat for a long time staring at a garment of
some yellow texture. “Know his father!” he said. “And he is immortal, and was fluttering about
his heaven when my ancestors were marsupials... I wish he was there now.”
He got up and began to feel the robe.
“I wonder how they get such things,” said the Vicar. Then he went and stared out of the
window. “I suppose everything is wonderful, even the rising and setting of the sun. I suppose
there is no adamantine ground for any belief. But one gets into a regular way of taking things.
This disturbs it. I seem to be waking up to the Invisible. It is the strangest of uncertainties. Ihave not felt so stirred and unsettled since my adolescence.”
Chapter 29 — Further Adventures of the Angel in the Village

“That’s all right,” said Crump when the bandaging was replaced. “It’s a trick of memory,
no doubt, but these excrescences of yours don’t seem nearly so large as they did yesterday. I
suppose they struck me rather forcibly. Stop and have lunch with me now you’re down here.
Midday meal, you know. The youngsters will be swallowed up by school again in the
“I never saw anything heal so well in my life,” he said, as they walked into the
diningroom. “Your blood and flesh must be as clean and free from bacteria as they make ‘em.
Whatever stuff there is in your head,” he added sotto voce.
At lunch he watched the Angel narrowly, and talked to draw him out.
“Journey tire you yesterday?” he said suddenly.
“Journey!” said the Angel. “Oh! my wings felt a little stiff.”
(“Not to be had”) said Crump to himself. (“Suppose I must enter into it.”)
“So you flew all the way, eigh? No conveyance?”
“There wasn’t any way,” explained the Angel, taking mustard. “I was flying up a
symphony with some Griffins and Fiery Cherubim, and suddenly everything went dark and I
was in this world of yours.”
“Dear me!” said Crump. “And that’s why you haven’t any luggage.” He drew his serviette
across his mouth, and a smile flickered in his eyes.
“I suppose you know this world of ours pretty well? Watching us over the adamantine
walls and all that kind of thing. Eigh?”
“Not very well. We dream of it sometimes. In the moonlight, when the Nightmares have
fanned us to sleep with their wings.”
“Ah, yes of course,” said Crump. “Very poetical way of putting it. Won’t you take some
Burgundy? It’s just beside you.”
“There’s a persuasion in this world, you know, that Angels’ Visits are by no means
infrequent. Perhaps some of your friends have travelled? They are supposed to come down to
deserving persons in prisons, and do refined Nautches and that kind of thing. Faust business,
you know.”
“I’ve never heard of anything of the kind,” said the Angel.
“Only the other day a lady whose baby was my patient for the time being — indigestion
— assured me that certain facial contortions the little creature made indicated that it was
Dreaming of Angels. In the novels of Mrs. Henry Wood that is spoken of as an infallible
symptom of an early departure. I suppose you can’t throw any light on that obscure
pathological manifestation?”
“I don’t understand it at all,” said the Angel, puzzled, and not clearly apprehending the
Doctor’s drift.
(“Getting huffy,”) said Crump to himself. (“Sees I’m poking fun at him.”) “There’s one
thing I’m curious about. Do the new arrivals complain much about their medical attendants?
I’ve always fancied there must be a good deal of hydropathic talk just at first. I was looking at
that picture in the Academy only this June...”
“New Arrivals!” said the Angel. “I really don’t follow you.”
The Doctor stared. “Don’t they come?”
“Come!” said the Angel. “Who?”
“The people who die here.”
“After they’ve gone to pieces here?”
“That’s the general belief, you know.”“People, like the woman who screamed out of the door, and the blackfaced man and his
volutations and the horrible little things that threw husks! — certainly not. I never saw such
creatures before I fell into this world.”
“Oh! but come!” said the Doctor. “You’ll tell me next your official robes are not white and
that you can’t play the harp.”
“There’s no such thing as white in the Angelic Land,” said the Angel. “It’s that queer blank
colour you get by mixing up all the others.”
“Why, my dear Sir!” said the Doctor, suddenly altering his tone, “you positively know
nothing about the Land you come from. White’s the very essence of it.”
The Angel stared at him. Was the man jesting? He looked perfectly serious.
“Look here,” said Crump, and getting up, he went to the sideboard on which a copy of
the Parish Magazine was lying. He brought it round to the Angel and opened it at the coloured
supplement. “Here’s some real Angels,” he said. “You see it’s not simply the wings make the
Angel. White you see, with a curly whisp of robe, sailing up into the sky with their wings furled.
Those are angels on the best authority. Hydroxyl kind of hair. One has a bit of a harp, you
see, and the other is helping this wingless lady — kind of larval Angel, you know — upward.”
“Oh! but really!” said the Angel, “those are not Angels at all.”
“But they are,” said Crump, putting the magazine back on the sideboard and resuming
his seat with an air of intense satisfaction. “I can assure you I have the best authority...”
“I can assure you...”
Crump tucked in the corners of his mouth and shook his head from side to side even as
he had done to the Vicar. “No good,” he said, “can’t alter our ideas just because an
irresponsible visitor...”
“If these are Angels,” said the Angel, “then I have never been in the Angelic Land.”
“Precisely,” said Crump, ineffably self-satisfied; “that was just what I was getting at.”
The Angel stared at him for a minute round eyed, and then was seized for the second
time by the human disorder of laughter.
“Ha, ha, ha!” said Crump, joining in. “I thought you were not quite so mad as you
seemed. Ha, ha, ha!”
And for the rest of the lunch they were both very merry, for entirely different reasons,
and Crump insisted upon treating the Angel as a “dorg” of the highest degree.
Chapter 30

After the Angel had left Crump’s house he went up the hill again towards the Vicarage.
But — possibly moved by the desire to avoid Mrs. Gustick — he turned aside at the stile and
made a detour by the Lark’s Field and Bradley’s Farm.
He came upon the Respectable Tramp slumbering peacefully among the wild-flowers. He
stopped to look, struck by the celestial tranquillity of that individual’s face. And even as he did
so the Respectable Tramp awoke with a start and sat up. He was a pallid creature, dressed in
rusty black, with a broken-spirited crush hat cocked over one eye. “Good afternoon,” he said
affably. “How are you?”
“Very well, thank you,” said the Angel, who had mastered the phrase.
The Respectable Tramp eyed the Angel critically. “Padding the Hoof, matey?” he said.
“Like me.”
The Angel was puzzled by him. “Why,” asked the Angel, “do you sleep like this instead of
sleeping up in the air on a Bed?”
“Well I’m blowed!” said the Respectable Tramp. “Why don’t I sleep in a bed? Well, it’s like
this. Sandringham’s got the painters in, there’s the drains up in Windsor Castle, and I ‘aven’t
no other ‘ouse to go to. You ‘aven’t the price of a arf pint in your pocket, ‘ave yer?”
“I have nothing in my pocket,” said the Angel.
“Is this here village called Siddermorton?” said the Tramp, rising creakily to his feet and
pointing to the clustering roofs down the hill.
“Yes,” said the Angel, “they call it Siddermorton.”
“I know it, I know it,” said the Tramp. “And a very pretty little village it is too.” He
stretched and yawned, and stood regarding the place. “‘Ouses,” he said reflectively; “Projuce”
— waving his hand at the cornfields and orchards. “Looks cosy, don’t it?”
“It has a quaint beauty of its own,” said the Angel.
“It ‘as a quaint beauty of its own — yes... Lord! I’d like to sack the blooming place... I
was born there.”
“Dear me,” said the Angel.
“Yes, I was born there. Ever heard of a pithed frog?”
“Pithed frog,” said the Angel. “No!”
“It’s a thing these here vivisectionists do. They takes a frog and they cuts out his brains
and they shoves a bit of pith in the place of ‘em. That’s a pithed frog. Well — that there village
is full of pithed human beings.”
The Angel took it quite seriously. “Is that so?” he said.
“That’s so — you take my word for it. Everyone of them ‘as ‘ad their brains cut out and
chunks of rotten touchwood put in the place of it. And you see that little red place there?”
“That’s called the national school,” said the Angel.
“Yes — that’s where they piths ‘em,” said the Tramp, quite in love with his conceit.
“Really! That’s very interesting.”
“It stands to reason,” said the Tramp. “If they ‘ad brains they’d ‘ave ideas, and if they ‘ad
ideas they’d think for themselves. And you can go through that village from end to end and
never meet anybody doing as much. Pithed human beings they are. I know that village. I was
born there, and I might be there now, a-toilin’ for my betters, if I ‘adn’t struck against the
“Is it a painful operation?” asked the Angel.
“In parts. Though it ain’t the heads gets hurt. And it lasts a long time. They take ‘em
young into that school, and they says to them, ‘come in ‘ere and we’ll improve your minds,’they says, and in the little kiddies go as good as gold. And they begins shovin’ it into them. Bit
by bit and ‘ard and dry, shovin’ out the nice juicy brains. Dates and lists and things. Out they
comes no brains in their ‘eads, and wound up nice and tight, ready to touch their ‘ats to
anyone who looks at them. Why! One touched ‘is ‘at to me yesterday. And they runs about
spry and does all the dirty work, and feels thankful they’re allowed to live. They take a positive
pride in ‘ard work for its own sake. Arter they bin pithed. See that chap ploughin’?”
“Yes,” said the Angel; “is he pithed?”
“Rather. Else he’d be paddin’ the hoof this pleasant weather — like me and the blessed
“I begin to understand,” said the Angel, rather dubiously.
“I knew you would,” said the Philosophical Tramp. “I thought you was the right sort. But
speaking serious, ain’t it ridiculous? — centuries and centuries of civilisation, and look at that
poor swine there, sweatin’ ‘isself empty and trudging up that ‘ill-side. ‘E’s English, ‘e is. ‘E
belongs to the top race in creation, ‘e does. ‘E’s one of the rulers of Indjer. It’s enough to
make a nigger laugh. The flag that’s braved a thousand years the battle an’ the breeze —
that’s ‘is flag. There never was a country was as great and glorious as this. Never. And that’s
wot it makes of us. I’ll tell you a little story about them parts as you seems to be a bit of a
stranger. There’s a chap called Gotch, Sir John Gotch they calls ‘im, and when ‘e was a young
gent from Oxford, I was a little chap of eight and my sister was a girl of seventeen. Their
servant she was. But Lord! everybody’s ‘eard that story — it’s common enough, of ‘im or the
likes of ‘im.”
“I haven’t,” said the Angel.
“All that’s pretty and lively of the gals they chucks into the gutters, and all the men with a
pennorth of spunk or adventure, all who won’t drink what the Curate’s wife sends ‘em instead
of beer, and touch their hats promiscous, and leave the rabbits and birds alone for their
betters, gets drove out of the villages as rough characters. Patriotism! Talk about improvin’
the race! Wot’s left ain’t fit to look a nigger in the face, a Chinaman ‘ud be ashamed of ‘em...”
“But I don’t understand,” said the Angel. “I don’t follow you.”
At that the Philosophic Tramp became more explicit, and told the Angel the simple story
of Sir John Gotch and the kitchen-maid. It’s scarcely necessary to repeat it. You may
understand that it left the Angel puzzled. It was full of words he did not understand, for the
only vehicle of emotion the Tramp possessed was blasphemy. Yet, though their tongues
differed so, he could still convey to the Angel some of his own (probably unfounded)
persuasion of the injustice and cruelty of life, and the utter detestableness of Sir John Gotch.
The last the Angel saw of him was his dusty black back receding down the lane towards
Iping Hanger. A pheasant appeared by the roadside, and the Philosophical Tramp immediately
caught up a stone and sent the bird clucking with a viciously accurate shot. Then he
disappeared round the corner.
Chapter 31 — Mrs. Jehoram’s Breadth of View

“I Heard some one playing the fiddle in the Vicarage, as I came by,” said Mrs. Jehoram,
taking her cup of tea from Mrs. Mendham.
“The Vicar plays,” said Mrs. Mendham. “I have spoken to George about it, but it’s no
good. I do not think a Vicar should be allowed to do such things. It’s so foreign. But there,
“I know, dear,” said Mrs. Jehoram. “But I heard the Vicar once at the schoolroom. I don’t
think this was the Vicar. It was quite clever, some of it, quite smart, you know. And new. I was
telling dear Lady Hammergallow this morning. I fancy —”
“The lunatic! Very likely. These half-witted people... My dear, I don’t think I shall ever
forget that dreadful encounter. Yesterday.”
“Nor I.”
“My poor girls! They are too shocked to say a word about it. I was telling dear Lady Ham
“Quite proper of them. It was dreadful, dear. For them.”
“And now, dear, I want you to tell me frankly — Do you really believe that creature was a
“You should have heard the violin.”
“I still more than half suspect, Jessie —” Mrs. Mendham leant forward as if to whisper.
Mrs. Jehoram helped herself to cake. “I’m sure no woman could play the violin quite like I
heard it played this morning.”
“Of course, if you say so that settles the matter,” said Mrs. Mendham. Mrs. Jehoram
was the autocratic authority in Siddermorton upon all questions of art, music and
belleslettres. Her late husband had been a minor poet. Then Mrs. Mendham added a judicial “Still
“Do you know,” said Mrs. Jehoram, “I’m half inclined to believe the dear Vicar’s story.”
“How good of you, Jessie,” said Mrs. Mendham.
“But really, I don’t think he could have had anyone in the Vicarage before that afternoon.
I feel sure we should have heard of it. I don’t see how a strange cat could come within four
miles of Siddermorton without the report coming round to us. The people here gossip so..”
“I always distrust the Vicar,” said Mrs. Mendham. “I know him.”
“Yes. But the story is plausible. If this Mr. Angel were someone very clever and eccentric
“He would have to be very eccentric to dress as he did. There are degrees and limits,
“But kilts,” said Mrs. Jehoram.
“Are all very well in the Highlands...”
Mrs. Jehoram’s eyes had rested upon a black speck creeping slowly across a patch of
yellowish-green up the hill.
“There he goes,” said Mrs. Jehoram, rising, “across the cornfield. I’m sure that’s him. I
can see the hump. Unless it’s a man with a sack. Bless me, Minnie! here’s an opera glass.
How convenient for peeping at the Vicarage!... Yes, it’s the man. He is a man. With such a
sweet face.”
Very unselfishly she allowed her hostess to share the opera glass. For a minute there
was a rustling silence.
“His dress,” said Mrs. Mendham, “is quite respectable now.’
“Quite,” said Mrs. Jehoram.Pause.
“He looks cross!”
“And his coat is dusty.”
“He walks steadily enough,” said Mrs. Mendham, “or one might think... This hot
Another pause.
“You see, dear,” said Mrs. Jehoram, putting down the lorgnette. “What I was going to
say was, that possibly he might be a genius in disguise.”
“If you can call next door to nothing a disguise.”
“No doubt it was eccentric. But I’ve seen children in little blouses, not at all unlike him. So
many clever people are peculiar in their dress and manners. A genius may steal a horse
where a bank-clerk may not look over the hedge. Very possibly he’s quite well known and
laughing at our Arcadian simplicity. And really it wasn’t so improper as some of these New
Women bicycling costumes. I saw one in one of the Illustrated Papers only a few days ago —
the New Budget I think — quite tights, you know, dear. No — I cling to the genius theory.
Especially after the playing. I’m sure the creature is original. Perhaps very amusing. In fact, I
intend to ask the Vicar to introduce me.”
“My dear!” cried Mrs. Mendham.
“I’m resolute,” said Mrs. Jehoram.
“I’m afraid you’re rash,” said Mrs. Mendham. “Geniuses and people of that kind are all
very well in London. But here — at the Vicarage.”
“We are going to educate the folks. I love originality. At any rate I mean to see him.”
“Take care you don’t see too much of him,” said Mrs. Mendham. “I’ve heard the fashion
is quite changing. I understand that some of the very best people have decided that genius is
not to be encouraged any more. These recent scandals...”
“Only in literature, I can assure you, dear. In music...”
“Nothing you can say, my dear,” said Mrs. Mendham, going off at a tangent, “will
convince me that that person’s costume was not extremely suggestive and improper.”
Chapter 32 — A Trivial Incident

The Angel came thoughtfully by the hedge across the field towards the Vicarage. The
rays of the setting sun shone on his shoulders, and touched the Vicarage with gold, and
blazed like fire in all the windows. By the gate, bathed in the sunlight, stood little Delia, the
waiting maid. She stood watching him under her hand. It suddenly came into the Angel’s mind
that she, at least, was beautiful, and not only beautiful but alive and warm.
She opened the gate for him and stood aside. She was sorry for him, for her elder sister
was a cripple. He bowed to her, as he would have done to any woman, and for just one
moment looked into her face. She looked back at him and something leapt within her.
The Angel made an irresolute movement. “Your eyes are very beautiful,” he said quietly,
with a remote wonder in his voice.
“Oh, sir!” she said, starting back. The Angel’s expression changed to perplexity. He went
on up the pathway between the Vicar’s flower-beds, and she stood with the gate held open in
her hand, staring after him. Just under the rose-twined verandah he turned and looked at her.
She still stared at him for a moment, and then with a queer gesture turned round with her
back to him, shutting the gate as she did so, and seemed to be looking down the valley
towards the church tower.
Chapter 33 — The Warp and the Woof of Things

At the dinner table the Angel told the Vicar the more striking of his day’s adventures.
“The strange thing,” said the Angel, “is the readiness of you Human Beings — the zest,
with which you inflict pain. Those boys pelting me this morning —”
“Seemed to enjoy it,” said the Vicar. “I know.”
“Yet they don’t like pain,” said the Angel.
“No,” said the Vicar; “they don’t like it.”
“Then, “said the Angel, “I saw some beautiful plants rising with a spike of leaves, two this
way and two that, and when I caressed one it caused the most uncomfortable —”
“Stinging nettle!” said the Vicar.
“At any rate a new sort of pain. And another plant with a head like a coronet, and richly
decorated leaves, spiked and jagged —”
“A thistle, possibly.”
“And in your garden, the beautiful sweet-smelling plant —”
“The sweet briar,” said the Vicar. “I remember.”
“And that pink flower that sprang out of the box —”
“Out of the box?” said the Vicar.
“Last night,” said the Angel, “that went climbing up the curtains — Flame!”
“Oh! — the matches and the candles! Yes,” said the Vicar.
“Then the animals. A dog to-day behaved most disagreeably —. And these boys, and the
way in which people speak —. Everyone seems anxious — willing at any rate — to give this
Pain. Everyone seems busy giving pain —”
“Or avoiding it,” said the Vicar, pushing his dinner away before him. “Yes — of course.
It’s fighting everywhere. The whole living world is a battle-field — the whole world. We are
driven by Pain. Here. How it lies on the surface! This Angel sees it in a day!”
“But why does everyone — everything — want to give pain? “asked the Angel.
“It is not so in the Angelic Land?” said the Vicar.
“No,” said the Angel. “Why is it so here?”
The Vicar wiped his lips with his napkin slowly. “It is so,” he said. “Pain,” said he still more
slowly, “is the warp and the woof of this life. Do you know,” he said, after a pause, “it is almost
impossible for me to imagine... a world without pain... And yet, as you played this morning —
“But this world is different. It is the very reverse of an Angelic world. Indeed, a number of
people — excellent religious people — have been so impressed by the universality of pain that
they think, after death, things will be even worse for a great many of us. It seems to me an
excessive view. But it’s a deep question. Almost beyond one’s power of discussion —”
And incontinently the Vicar plumped into an impromptu dissertation upon “Necessity,”
how things were so because they were so, how one had to do this and that. “Even our food,”
said the Vicar. “What?” said the Angel. “Is not obtained without inflicting Pain,” said the Vicar.
The Angel’s face went so white that the Vicar checked himself suddenly. Or he was just
on the very verge of a concise explanation of the antecedents of a leg of lamb. There was a
“By-the-bye,” said the Angel, suddenly. “Have you been pithed? Like the common
Chapter 34 — The Angel’s Debut

When Lady Hammergallow made up her mind, things happened as she resolved. And
though the Vicar made a spasmodic protest, she carried out her purpose and got audience,
Angel, and violin together, at Siddermorton House before the week was out. “A genius the
Vicar has discovered,” she said; so with eminent foresight putting any possibility of blame for a
failure on the Vicar’s shoulders. “The dear Vicar tells me,” she would say, and proceed to
marvellous anecdotes of the Angel’s cleverness with his instrument. But she was quite in love
with her idea — she had always had a secret desire to play the patroness to obscure talent.
Hitherto it had not turned out to be talent when it came to the test.
“It would be such a good thing for him,” she said. “His hair is long already, and with that
high colour he would be beautiful, simply beautiful on a platform. The Vicar’s clothes fitting him
so badly makes him look quite like a fashionable pianist already. And the scandal of his birth
— not told, of course, but whispered — would be quite an Inducement — when he gets to
London, that is.”
The Vicar had the most horrible sensations as the day approached. He spent hours
trying to explain the situation to the Angel, other hours trying to imagine what people would
think, still worse hours trying to anticipate the Angel’s behaviour. Hitherto the angel had
always played for his own satisfaction. The Vicar would startle him every now and then by
rushing upon him with some new point of etiquette that had just occurred to him. As for
instance: “It’s very important where you put your hat, you know. Don’t put it on a chair,
whatever you do. Hold it until you get your tea, you know, and then — let me see — then put
it down somewhere, you know.” The journey to Siddermorton House was accomplished
without misadventure, but at the moment of introduction the Vicar had a spasm of horrible
misgivings. He had forgotten to explain introductions. The Angel’s naive amusement was
evident, but nothing very terrible happened.
“Rummy looking greaser,” said Mr. Rathbone-Slater, who devoted considerable attention
to costume. “Wants grooming. No manners. Grinned when he saw me shaking hands. Did it
chic enough, I thought.”
One trivial incident occurred. When Lady Hammergallow welcomed the Angel she looked
at him through her glasses. The apparent size of her eyes startled him. His surprise and his
quick attempt to peer over the brims was only too evident. But the Vicar had warned him of
the ear-trumpet.
The Angel’s incapacity to sit on anything but a music stool appeared to excite some
interest among the ladies, but led to no remarks. They regarded it perhaps as the affectation
of a budding professional. He was remiss with the teacups and scattered the crumbs of his
cake abroad. (You must remember he was quite an amateur at eating.) He crossed his legs.
He fumbled over the hat business after vainly trying to catch the Vicar’s eye. The eldest Miss
Papaver tried to talk to him about continental watering places and cigarettes, and formed a
low opinion of his intelligence.
The Angel was surprised by the production of an easel and several books of music, and
a little unnerved at first by the sight of Lady Hammergallow sitting with her head on one side,
watching him with those magnified eyes through her gilt glasses.
Mrs. Jehoram came up to him before he began to play and asked him the Name of the
Charming Piece he was playing the other afternoon. The Angel said it had no name, and Mrs.
Jehoram thought music ought never to have any names and wanted to know who it was by,
and when the Angel told her he played it out of his head, she said he must be Quite a Genius
and looked open (and indisputably fascinating) admiration at him. The Curate from IpingHanger (who was professionally a Kelt and who played the piano and talked colour and music
with an air of racial superiority) watched him jealously.
The Vicar, who was presently captured and set down next to Lady Hammergallow, kept
an anxious eye ever Angelward while she told him particulars of the incomes made by
violinists — particulars which, for the most part, she invented as she went along. She had
been a little ruffled by the incident of the glasses, but had decided that it came within the limits
of permissible originality.
So figure to yourself the Green Saloon at Siddermorton Park; an Angel thinly disguised in
clerical vestments and with a violin in his hands, standing by the grand piano, and a
respectable gathering of quiet nice people, nicely dressed, grouped about the room.
Anticipatory gabble — one hears scattered fragments of conversation.
“He is incog”; said the very eldest Miss Papaver to Mrs. Pirbright. “Isn’t it quaint and
delicious. Jessica Jehoram says she saw him at Vienna, but she can’t remember the name.
The Vicar knows all about him, but he is so close —”
“How hot and uncomfortable the dear Vicar is looking,” said Mrs. Pirbright. “I’ve noticed it
before when he sits next to Lady Hammergallow. She simply will not respect his cloth. She
goes on —”
“His tie is all askew,” said the very eldest Miss Papaver, “and his hair! It really hardly
looks as though he had brushed it all day.”
“Looks a foreign sort of chap. Affected. All very well in a drawing-room,” said George
Harringay, sitting apart with the younger Miss Pirbright. “But for my part give me a masculine
man and a feminine woman. What do you think?”
“Oh! — I think so too,” said the younger Miss Pirbright.
“Guineas and guineas,” said Lady Hammergallow. “I’ve heard that some of them keep
quite stylish establishments. You would scarcely credit it —”
“I love music, Mr. Angel, I adore it. It stirs something in me. I can scarcely describe it,”
said Mrs. Jehoram. “Who is it says that delicious antithesis: Life without music is brutality;
music without life is — Dear me! perhaps you remember? Music without life — it’s Ruskin I
“I’m sorry that I do not,” said the Angel. “I have read very few books.”
“How charming of you!” said Mrs. Jehoram. “I wish I didn’t. I sympathise with you
profoundly. I would do the same, only we poor women — I suppose it’s originality we lack —
And down here one is driven to the most desperate proceedings —”
“He’s certainly very pretty. But the ultimate test of a man is his strength,” said George
Harringay. “What do you think?”
“Oh! — I think so too,” said the younger Miss Pirbright.
“It’s the effeminate man who makes the masculine woman. When the glory of a man is
his hair, what’s a woman to do? And when men go running about with beautiful hectic dabs
“Oh George! You are so dreadfully satirical to-day,” said the younger Miss Pirbright. “I’m
sure it isn’t paint.”
“I’m really not his guardian, my dear Lady Hammergallow. Of course it’s very kind indeed
of you to take such an interest —”
“Are you really going to improvise?” said Mrs. Jehoram in a state of cooing delight.
“SSsh!” said the Curate from Iping Hanger.
Then the Angel began to play, looking straight before him as he did so, thinking of the
wonderful things of the Angelic Land, and insensibly letting the sadness he was beginning to
feel, steal over the fantasia he was playing. When he forgot his company the music was
strange and sweet; when the sense of his surroundings floated into his mind the music grew
capricious and grotesque. Mrs. Jehoram sat and looked rapt and sympathetic as hard as she
could (though the music was puzzling at times) and tried to catch his eye. He really had awonderfully expressive face, and the tenderest shades of expression! And Mrs. Jehoram was
a judge. George Harringay looked bored, until the younger Miss Pirbright, who adored him,
put out her mousy little shoe to touch his manly boot, and then he turned his face to catch the
feminine delicacy of her coquettish eye, and so was comforted. The very eldest Miss Papaver
and Mrs. Pirbright sat quite still and looked churchy for nearly four minutes.
Then said the eldest Miss Papaver in a whisper, “I always Enjoy violin music so much.”
And Mrs. Pirbright answered, “We get so little Nice music down here.” And Miss Papaver said,
“He plays Very nicely.” And Mrs. Pirbright, “Such a Delicate Touch!” And Miss Papaver, “Does
Willie keep up his lessons?” and so to a whispered conversation.
The Curate from Iping Hanger sat (he felt) in full view of the company. He had one hand
curled round his ear, and his eyes hard and staring fixedly at the pedestal of the
Hammergallow Sèvres vase. He supplied, by the movements of his mouth, a kind of critical
guide to any of the company who were disposed to avail themselves of it. It was a generous
way he had. His aspect was severely judicial, tempered by starts of evil dent disapproval and
guarded appreciation. The Vicar leaned back in his chair and stared at the Angel’s face, and
was presently rapt away in a wonderful dream. Lady Hammergallow, with quick jerky
movements of the head and a low but insistent rustling, surveyed and tried to judge of the
effect of the Angelic playing. Mr. Rathbone-Slater stared very solemnly into his hat and looked
very miserable, and Mrs. Rathbone-Slater made mental memoranda of Mrs. Jehoram’s
sleeves. And the air about them all was heavy with exquisite music — for all that had ears to
“Scarcely affected enough,” whispered Lady Hammergallow hoarsely, suddenly poking
the Vicar in the ribs. The Vicar came out of Dreamland suddenly. “Eigh?” shouted the Vicar,
startled, coming up with a jump. “Sssh!” said the Curate from Iping Hanger, and everyone
looked shocked at the brutal insensibility of Hilyer. “So unusual of the Vicar,” said the very
eldest Miss Papaver, “to do things like that!” The Angel went on playing.
The Curate from Iping Hanger began making mesmeric movements with his index finger,
and as the thing proceeded Mr. Rathbone-Slater got amazingly limp. He solemnly turned his
hat round and altered his view. The Vicar lapsed from an uneasy discomfort into dreamland
again. Lady Hammergallow rustled a great deal, and presently found a way of making her
chair creak. And at last the thing came to an end. Lady Hammergallow exclaimed “De-licious!”
though she had never heard a note, and began clapping her hands. At that everyone clapped
except Mr. Rathbone-Slater, who rapped his hat brim instead. The Curate from Iping Hanger
clapped with a judicial air.
“So I said (clap, clap, clap), if you cannot cook the food my way (clap, clap, clap) you
must go” said Mrs. Pirbright, clapping vigorously. “(This music is a delightful treat.)”
“(It is. I always revel in music,)” said the very eldest Miss Papaver. “And did she improve
after that?”
“Not a bit of it,” said Mrs. Pirbright.
The Vicar woke up again and stared round the saloon. Did other people see these
visions, or were they confined to him alone? Surely they must all see... and have a wonderful
command of their feelings. It was incredible that such music should not affect them. “He’s a
trifle gauche” said Lady Hammergallow, jumping upon the Vicar’s attention. “He neither bows
nor smiles. He must cultivate oddities like that. Every successful executant is more or less
“Did you really make that up yourself?” said Mrs. Jehoram, sparkling her eyes at him, “as
you went along. Really, it is wonderful! Nothing less than wonderful.”
“A little amateurish,” said the Curate from Iping Hanger to Mr. Rathbone-Slater. “A great
gift, undoubtedly, but a certain lack of sustained training. There were one or two little things...
I would like to talk to him.”
“His trousers look like concertinas,” said Mr. Rathbone-Slater. “He ought to be told that.It’s scarcely decent.”
“Can you do Imitations, Mr. Angel?” said Lady Hammergallow.
“Oh do, do some Imitations!” said Mrs. Jehoram. “I adore Imitations.”
“It was a fantastic thing,” said the Curate of Iping Hanger to the Vicar of Siddermorton,
waving his long indisputably musical hands as he spoke; “a little involved, to my mind. I have
heard it before somewhere — I forget where. He has genius undoubtedly, but occasionally he
is — loose. There is a certain deadly precision wanting. There are years of discipline yet.”
“ I don’t admire these complicated pieces of music,” said George Harringay. “I have
simple tastes, I’m afraid. There seems to me no tune in it. There’s nothing I like so much as
simple music. Tune, simplicity is the need of the age, in my opinion. We are so over subtle.
Everything is far-fetched. Home-grown thoughts and ‘Home, Sweet Home’ for me. What do
you think?”
“Oh! I think so — quite,” said the younger Miss Pirbright.
“Well, Amy, chattering to George as usual?” said Mrs. Pirbright, across the room.
“As usual, Ma!” said the younger Miss Pirbright, glancing round with a bright smile at
Miss Papaver, and turning again so as not to lose the next utterance from George.
“I wonder if you and Mr. Angel could manage a duet?” said Lady Hammergallow to the
Curate from Iping Hanger, who was looking preternaturally gloomy.
“I’m sure I should be delighted,” said the Curate from Iping Hanger, brightening up.
“Duets!” said the Angel; “the two of us. Then he can play. I understood — the Vicar told
me —”
“Mr. Wilmerdings is an accomplished pianist,” interrupted the Vicar.
“But the Imitations?” said Mrs. Jehoram, who detested Wilmerdings.
“Imitations!” said the Angel.
“A pig squeaking, a cock crowing, you know,” said Mr. Rathbone-Slater, and added
lower, “Best fun you can get out of a fiddle — my opinion.’
“I really don’t understand,” said the Angel. “A pig crowing!”
“You don’t like Imitations,” said Mrs. Jehoram. “Nor do I really. I accept the snub. I think
they degrade...”
“Perhaps afterwards Mr. Angel will Relent,” said Lady Hammergallow, when Mrs.
Pirbright had explained the matter to her. She could scarcely credit her ear-trumpet. When
she asked for Imitations she was accustomed to get Imitations.
Mr. Wilmerdings had seated himself at the piano, and had turned to a familiar pile of
music in the recess. “What do you think of that Bar-carole thing of Spohr’s?” he said over his
shoulder. “I suppose you know it?” The Angel looked bewildered.
He opened the folio before the Angel.
“What an odd kind of book!” said the Angel. “What do all those crazy dots mean?” (At
that the Vicar’s blood ran cold.)
“What dots?” said the Curate.
“There!” said the Angel with incriminating finger.
“Oh come!” said the Curate.
There was one of those swift, short silences that mean so much in a social gathering.
Then the eldest Miss Papaver turned upon the Vicar. “Does not Mr. Angel play from
ordinary... Music — from the ordinary notation?”
“I have never heard,” said the Vicar, getting red now after the first shock of horror. “I
have really never seen...”
The Angel felt the situation was strained, though what was straining it he could not
understand. He became aware of a doubtful, an unfriendly look upon the faces that regarded
him. “Impossible!” he heard Mrs. Pirbright say; “after that beautiful music.” The eldest Miss
Papaver went to Lady Hammergallow at once, and began to explain into her ear-trumpet that
Mr. Angel did not wish to play with Mr. Wilmerdings, and alleged an ignorance of writtenmusic.
“He cannot play from Notes!” said Lady Hammergallow in a voice of measured horror.
“Notes!” said the Angel perplexed. “Are these notes?” asked the Angel.
“It’s carrying the joke too far — simply because he doesn’t want to play with
Wilmerdings,” said Mr. Rathbone-Slater to George Harringay.
There was an expectant pause. The Angel perceived he had to be ashamed of himself.
He was ashamed of himself.
“Then,” said Lady Hammergallow, throwing her head back and speaking with deliberate
indignation, as she rustled forward, “if you cannot play with Mr. Wilmerdings I am afraid I
cannot ask you to play again.” She made it sound like an ultimatum. Her glasses in her hand
quivered violently with indignation. The Angel was now human enough to appreciate the fact
that he was crushed.
“What is it?” said little Lucy Rustchuck in the further bay.
“He’s refused to play with old Wilmerdings,” said Tommy Rathbone-Slater. “What a lark!
The old girl’s purple. She thinks heaps of that ass, Wilmerdings.”
“Perhaps, Mr. Wilmerdings, you will favour us with that delicious Polonaise of Chopin’s,”
said Lady Hammergallow. Everybody else was hushed. The indignation of Lady
Hammergallow inspired much the same silence as a coming earthquake or an eclipse. Mr.
Wilmerdings perceived he would be doing a real social service to begin at once, and (be it
entered to his credit now that his account draws near its settlement) he did.
“If a man pretend to practise an Art,” said George Harringay, “he ought at least to have
the conscience to study the elements of it. What do you...”
“Oh! I think so too,” said the youngest Miss Pirbright.
The Vicar felt that the heavens had fallen. He sat crumpled up in his chair, a shattered
man. Lady Hammergallow sat down next to him without appearing to see him. She was
breathing heavily, but her face was terribly calm. Everyone sat down. Was the Angel grossly
ignorant or only grossly impertinent? The Angel was vaguely aware of some frightful offence,
aware that in some mysterious way he had ceased to be the centre of the gathering. He saw
reproachful despair in the Vicar’s eye. He drifted slowly towards the window in the recess and
sat down on the little octagonal Moorish stool by the side of Mrs. Jehoram. And under the
circumstances he appreciated at more than its proper value Mrs. Jehoram’s kindly smile. He
put down the violin in the window seat.
Chapter 35

Mrs. Jehoram and the Angel (apart)— Mr. Wilmerdings playing.
“I have so longed for a quiet word with you,” said Mrs. Jehoram in a low tone. “To tell you
how delightful I found your playing.”
“I am glad it pleased you,” said the Angel.
“Pleased is scarcely the word,” said Mrs. Jehoram. “I was moved — profoundly. These
others did not understand... I was glad you did not play with him.”
The Angel looked at the mechanism called Wilmerdings, and felt glad too. (The Angelic
conception of duets is a kind of conversation upon violins.) But he said nothing.
“I worship music,” said Mrs. Jehoram. “I know nothing about it technically, but there is
something in it a longing, a wish...”
The Angel stared at her face. She met his eyes.
“You understand,” she said. “I see you understand.” He was certainly a very nice boy,
sentimentally precocious perhaps, and with deliciously liquid eyes.
There was an interval of Chopin (Op. 40) played with immense precision.
Mrs. Jehoram had a sweet face still, in shadow, with the light falling round her golden
hair, and a curious theory flashed across the Angel’s mind. The perceptible powder only
supported his view of something infinitely bright and lovable caught, tarnished, coarsened,
coated over.
“Do you,” said the Angel in a low tone. “Are you... separated from... your world?”
“As you are?” whispered Mrs. Jehoram.
“This is so — cold,” said the Angel. “So harsh!” He meant the whole world.
“I feel it too,” said Mrs. Jehoram, referring to Siddermorton Home.
“There are those who cannot live without sympathy,” she said after a sympathetic pause.
“And times when one feels alone in the world. Fighting a battle against it all. Laughing, flirting,
hiding the pain of it...”
“And hoping,” said the Angel with a wonderful glance. — “Yes.”
Mrs. Jehoram (who was an epicure of flirtations) felt the Angel was more than redeeming
the promise of his appearance. (Indisputably he worshipped her.) “Do you look for sympathy?”
she said. “Or have you found it?”
“I think,” said the Angel, very softly, leaning forward, “I think I have found it.”
Interval of Chopin Op. 40. The very eldest Miss Papaver and Mrs. Pirbright whispering.
Lady Hammergallow (glasses up) looking down the saloon with an unfriendly expression at the
Angel. Mrs. Jehoram and the Angel exchanging deep and significant glances.
“Her name,” said the Angel (Mrs. Jehoram made a movement), “is Delia. She is...”
“Delia!” said Mrs. Jehoram sharply, suddenly realising a terrible misunderstanding. “A
fanciful name... Why!... No! Not that little housemaid at the Vicarage —?...”
The Polonaise terminated with a flourish. The Angel was quite surprised at the change in
Mrs. Jehoram’s expression.
“I never did!” said Mrs. Jehoram, recovering. “To make me your confidant in an intrigue
with a servant. Really, Mr. Angel, it’s possible to be too original...”
Then suddenly their colloquy was interrupted.
Chapter 36

This section is (so far as my memory goes) the shortest in the book.
But the enormity of the offence necessitates the separation of this section from all other
The Vicar, you must understand, had done his best to inculcate the recognised
differentiae of a gentleman. “Never allow a lady to carry anything,” said the Vicar. “Say,
‘permit me’ and relieve her.” “Always stand until every lady is seated.” “Always rise and open a
door for a lady...” and so forth. (All men who have elder sisters know that code.)
And the Angel (who had failed to relieve Lady Hammergallow of her teacup) danced
forward with astonishing dexterity (leaving Mrs. Jehoram in the window seat) and with an
elegant “permit me” rescued the tea-tray from Lady Hammergallow’s pretty parlour-maid and
vanished officiously in front of her. The Vicar rose to his feet with an inarticulate cry.
Chapter 37

“He’s drunk!” said Mr. Rathbone-Slater, breaking a terrific silence. “That’s the matter with
Mrs. Jehoram laughed hysterically.
The Vicar stood up, motionless, staring. “Oh! I forgot to explain servants to him!” said the
Vicar to himself in a swift outbreak of remorse. “I thought he did understand servants.”
“Really, Mr. Hilyer!” said Lady Hammergallow, evidently exercising enormous self-control
and speaking in panting spasms. “Really, Mr. Hilyer! — Your genius is too terrible. I must, I
really must, ask you to take him home.”
So to the dialogue in the corridor of alarmed maid-servant and well-meaning (but
shockingly gauche) Angel appears the Vicar, his botryoidal little face crimson, gaunt despair in
his eyes, and his necktie under his left ear.
“Come,” he said struggling with emotion. “Come away... I... I am disgraced for ever.”
And the Angel stared for a second at him and obeyed — meekly, perceiving himself in
the presence of unknown but evidently terrible forces.
And so began and ended the Angel’s social career.
In the informal indignation meeting that followed, Lady Hammergallow took the (informal)
chair. “I feel humiliated,” she said. “The Vicar assured me he was an exquisite player. I never
“He was drunk,” said Mr. Rathbone-Slater. “You could tell it from the way he fumbled
with his tea.”
“Such a fiasco!” said Mrs. Mergle.
“The Vicar assured me,” said Lady Hammergallow. “‘The man I have staying with me is a
musical genius,’ he said. His very words.”
“His ears must be burning anyhow,” said Tommy Rathbone-Slater.
“I was trying to keep him Quiet,” said Mrs. Jehoram. “By humouring him. And do you
know the things he said to me — there!”
“The thing he played,” said Mr. Wilmerdings, “— I must confess I did not like to charge
him to his face. But really! It was merely drifting.”
“Just fooling with a fiddle, eigh?” said George Harringay. “Well, I thought it was beyond
me. So much of your fine music is —”
“Oh, George!” said the youngest Miss Pirbright.
“The Vicar was a bit on too — to judge by his tie,” said Mr. Rathbone-Slater. “It’s a
dashed nimmy go. Did you notice how he fussed after the genius?”
“One has to be so very careful,” said the very eldest Miss Papaver.
“He told me he is in love with the Vicar’s housemaid!” said Mrs. Jehoram. “I almost
laughed in his face.”
“The Vicar ought never to have brought him here,” said Mrs. Rathbone-Slater with
Chapter 38 — The Trouble of the Barbed Wire

So, ingloriously, ended the Angel’s first and last appearance in Society. Vicar and Angel
returned to the Vicarage; crestfallen black figures in the bright sunlight, going dejectedly. The
Angel, deeply pained that the Vicar was pained. The Vicar, dishevelled and desperate,
intercalating spasmodic remorse and apprehension with broken explanations of the Theory of
Etiquette. “They do not understand,” said the Vicar over and over again. “They will all be so
very much aggrieved. I do not know what to say to them. It is all so confused, so perplexing.”
And at the gate of the Vicarage, at the very spot where Delia had first seemed beautiful, stood
Horrocks, the village constable, awaiting them. He held coiled up about his hand certain short
lengths of barbed wire.
“Good-evening, Horrocks,” said the Vicar as the constable held the gate open.
“Evening Sir,” said Horrocks, and added in a kind of mysterious undertone, “Could I
speak to you a minute, Sir?”
“Certainly,” said the Vicar. The Angel walked on thoughtfully to the house, and meeting
Delia in the hall stopped her and cross-examined her at length over differences between
Servants and Ladies.
“You’ll excuse my taking the liberty, Sir,” said Horrocks, “but there’s trouble brewin’ for
that crippled gent you got stayin’ here.”
“Bless me!” said the Vicar. “You don’t say so!”
“Sir John Gotch, Sir. He’s very angry indeed, Sir. His language, Sir —. But I felt bound to
tell you, Sir. He’s certain set on taking out a summons on account of that there barbed wire.
Certain set, Sir, he is.”
“Sir John Gotch!” said the Vicar. “Wire! I don’t understand.”
“He asked me to find out who did it. Course I’ve had to do my duty, Sir. Naturally a
disagreeable one.”
“Barbed wire! Duty! I don’t understand you, Horrocks.”
“I’m afraid, Sir, there’s no denying the evidence. I’ve made careful enquiries, Sir.” And
forthwith the constable began telling the Vicar of a new and terrible outrage committed by the
Angelic visitor.
But we need not follow that explanation in detail — or the subsequent confession. (For
my own part I think there is nothing more tedious than dialogue.) It gave the Vicar a new view
of the Angelic character, a vignette of the Angelic indignation. A shady lane, sun-mottled,
sweet hedges full of honeysuckle and vetch on either side, and a little girl gathering flowers,
forgetful of the barbed wire which, all along the Sidderford Road, fenced in the dignity of Sir
John Gotch from “bounders” and the detested “million.” Then suddenly a gashed hand, a
bitter outcry, and the Angel sympathetic, comforting, inquisitive. Explanations sob-set, and
then — altogether novel phenomenon in the Angelic career — passion. A furious onslaught
upon the barbed wire of Sir John Gotch, barbed wire recklessly handled, slashed, bent and
broken. Yet the Angel acted without personal malice — saw in the thing only an ugly and
vicious plant that trailed insidiously among its fellows. Finally the Angel’s explanations gave the
Vicar a picture of the Angel alone amidst his destruction, trembling and amazed at the sudden
force, not himself, that had sprung up within him, and set him striking and cutting. Amazed,
too, at the crimson blood that trickled down his fingers.
“It is still more horrible,” said the Angel when the Vicar had explained the artificial nature
of the thing.” If I had seen the man who put this silly-cruel stuff there to hurt little children, I
know I should have tried to inflict pain upon him. I have never felt like this before. I am indeed
becoming tainted and coloured altogether by the wickedness of this world.“To think, too, that you men should be so foolish as to combine to uphold a law that lets
a man do such spiteful things. Yes I know; you will say it has to be so. For some remoter
reason. That is a thing that only makes me angrier. Why cannot an act rest on its own
merits?... As it does in the Angelic Land.”
That was the incident the history of which the Vicar now gradually learnt, getting the bare
outline from Horrocks, the colour and emotion subsequently from the Angel. The thing had
happened the day before the musical festival at Siddermorton House.
“Have you told Sir John who did it?” asked the Vicar. “And are you sure?”
“Quite sure, Sir. There can be no doubting it was your gentleman, Sir. I’ve not told Sir
John yet, Sir. But I shall have to tell Sir John this evening. Meaning no offence to you, Sir, as I
hopes you’ll see. It’s my duty, Sir. Besides which —”
“Of course,” said the Vicar, hastily. “Certainly it’s your duty. And what will Sir John do?”
“He’s dreadful set against the person who did it — destroying property like that — and
sort of slapping his arrangements in the face.”
Pause. Horrocks made a movement. The Vicar, tie almost at the back of his neck now, a
most unusual thing for him, stared blankly at his toes.
“I thought I’d tell you, Sir,” said Horrocks.
“Yes,” said the Vicar. “Thanks, Horrocks, thanks!” He scratched the back of his head.
“You might perhaps... I think it’s the best way... Quite sure Mr. Angel did it?”
“Sherlock ‘Omes, Sir, couldn’t be cocksurer.”
“Then I’d better give you a little note to the Squire.”
Chapter 39

The Vicar’s table-talk at dinner that night, after the Angel had stated his case, was full of
grim explanations, prisons, madness.
“It’s too late to tell the truth about you now,” said the Vicar. “Besides, that’s impossible. I
really do not know what to say. We must face our circumstances, I suppose. I am so
undecided — so torn. It’s the two worlds. If your Angelic world were only a dream, or if this
world were only a dream — or if I could believe either or both dreams, it would be all right with
me. But here is a real Angel and a real summons — how to reconcile them I do not know. I
must talk to Gotch... But he won’t understand. Nobody will understand...”
“I am putting you to terrible inconvenience, I am afraid. My appalling unworldliness —”
“It’s not you,” said the Vicar. “It’s not you. I perceive you have brought something
strange and beautiful into my life. It’s not you. It’s myself. If I had more faith either way. If I
could believe entirely in this world, and call you an Abnormal Phenomenon, as Crump does.
But no. Terrestrial Angelic, Angelic Terrestrial... See-Saw.”
“Still, Gotch is certain to be disagreeable, most disagreeable. He always is. It puts me
into his hands. He is a bad moral influence, I know. Drinking. Gambling. Worse. Still, one must
render unto Caesar the things that are Caesar’s. And he is against Disestablishment...”
Then the Vicar would revert to the social collapse of the afternoon. “You are so very
fundamental, you know,” he said — several times.
The Angel went to his own room puzzled but very depressed. Every day the world had
frowned darker upon him and his angelic ways. He could see how the trouble affected the
Vicar, yet he could not imagine how he could avert it. It was all so strange and unreasonable.
Twice again, too, he had been pelted out of the village.
He found the violin lying on his bed where he had laid it before dinner. And taking it up he
began to play to comfort himself. But now he played no delicious vision of the Angelic Land.
The iron of the world was entering into his soul. For a week now he had known pain and
rejection, suspicion and hatred; a strange new spirit of revolt was growing up in his heart. He
played a melody, still sweet and tender as those of the Angelic Land, but charged with a new
note, the note of human sorrow and effort, now swelling into something like defiance, dying
now into a plaintive sadness. He played softly, playing to himself to comfort himself, but the
Vicar heard, and all his finite bothers were swallowed up in a hazy melancholy, a melancholy
that was somehow quite remote from sorrow. And besides the Vicar, the Angel had another
hearer of whom neither Angel nor Vicar was thinking.
Chapter 40 — Delia

She was only four or five yards away from the Angel in the westward gable. The
diamond-paned window of her little white room was open. She knelt on her box of japanned
tin, and rested her chin on her hands, her elbows on the window-sill. The young moon hung
over the pine trees, and its light, cool and colourless, lay softly upon the silent-sleeping world.
Its light fell upon her white face, and discovered new depths in her dreaming eyes. Her soft
lips fell apart and showed the little white teeth.
Delia was thinking vaguely, wonderfully, as girls will think. It was feeling rather than
thinking; clouds of beautiful translucent emotion drove across the clear sky of her mind, taking
shape that changed and vanished. She had all that wonderful emotional tenderness, that
subtle exquisite desire for self-sacrifice, which exists so inexplicably in a girl’s heart, exists it
seems only to be presently trampled under foot by the grim and gross humours of daily life, to
be ploughed in again roughly and remorselessly, as the farmer ploughs in the clover again
that has sprung up in the soil. She had been looking out at the tranquillity of the moonlight
long before the Angel began to play — waiting; then suddenly the quiet, motionless beauty of
silver and shadow was suffused with tender music.
She did not move, but her lips closed and her eyes grew even softer. She had been
thinking before of the strange glory that had suddenly flashed out about the stooping
hunchback when he spoke to her in the sunset; of that and of a dozen other glances, chance
turns, even once the touching of her hand. That afternoon he had spoken to her, asking
strange questions. Now the music seemed to bring his very face before her, his look of half
curious solicitude, peering into her face, into her eyes, into her and through her, deep down
into her soul. He seemed now to be speaking directly to her, telling her of his solitude and
trouble. Oh! that regret, that longing! For he was in trouble. And how could a servant-girl help
him, this soft-spoken gentleman who carried himself so kindly, who played so sweetly. The
music was so sweet and keen, it came so near to the thought of her heart, that presently one
band tightened on the other, and the tears came streaming down her face.
As Crump would tell you, people do not do that kind of thing unless there is something
wrong with the nervous system. But then, from the scientific point of view, being in love is a
pathological condition.
I am painfully aware of the objectionable nature of my story here. I have even thought of
wilfully perverting the truth to propitiate the Lady Reader. But I could not. The story has been
too much for me. I do the thing with my eyes open. Delia must remain what she really was —
a servant-girl. I know that to give a mere servant-girl, or at least an English servant-girl, the
refined feelings of a human being, to present her as speaking with anything but an intolerable
confusion of aspirates, places me outside the pale of respectable writers. Association with
servants, even in thought, is dangerous in these days. I can only plead (pleading vainly, I
know), that Delia was a very exceptional servant-girl. Possibly, if one enquired, it might be
found that her parentage was upper middle-class — that she was made of the finer upper
middle-class clay. And (this perhaps may avail me better) I will promise that in some future
work I will redress the balance, and the patient reader shall have the recognised article,
enormous feet and hands, systematic aspiration of vowels and elimination of aspirates, no
figure (only middle-class girls have figures — the thing is beyond a servant-girl’s means), a
fringe (by agreement), and a cheerful readiness to dispose of her self-respect for
half-acrown. That is the accepted English servant, the typical English woman (when stripped of
money and accomplishments) as she appears in the works of contemporary writers. But Delia
somehow was different. I can only regret the circumstance — it was altogether beyond mycontrol.
Chapter 41 — Doctor Crump Acts

Early the next morning the Angel went down through the village, and climbing the fence,
waded through the waist-high reeds that fringe the Sidder. He was going to Bandram Bay to
take a nearer view of the sea, which one could just see on a clear day from the higher parts of
Siddermorton Park. And suddenly he came upon Crump sitting on a log and smoking. (Crump
always smoked exactly two ounces per week and he always smoked it in the open air.)
“Hullo!” said Crump, in his healthiest tone. “How’s the wing?”
“Very well,” said the Angel. “The pain’s gone.”
“I suppose you know you are trespassing?”
“Trespassing!” said the Angel.
“I suppose you don’t know what that means,” said Crump.
“I don’t,” said the Angel.
“I must congratulate you. I don’t know how long you will last, but you are keeping it up
remarkably well. I thought at first you were a mattoid, but you’re so amazingly consistent.
Your attitude of entire ignorance of the elementary facts of Life is really a very amusing pose.
You make slips of course, but very few. But surely we two understand one another.”
He smiled at the Angel. “You would beat Sherlock Holmes. I wonder who you really are.”
The Angel smiled back, with eyebrows raised and hands extended. “It’s impossible for
you to know who I am. Your eyes are blind, your ears deaf, your soul dark, to all that is
wonderful about me. It’s no good my telling that I fell into your world.”
The Doctor waved his pipe. “Not that, please. I don’t want to pry if you have your
reasons for keeping quiet. Only I would like you to think of Hilyer’s mental health. He really
believes this story.”
The Angel shrugged his dwindling wings.
“You did not know him before this affair. He’s changed tremendously. He used to be neat
and comfortable. For the last fortnight he’s been hazy, with a far-away look in his eyes. He
preached last Sunday without his cuff links, and something wrong with his tie, and he took for
his text, ‘Eye hath not seen nor ear heard.’ He really believes all this nonsense about the
Angel-land. The man is verging on monomania!”
“You will see things from your own stand-point,” said the Angel.
“Every one must. At any rate, I think it jolly regrettable to see this poor old fellow
hypnotised, as you certainly have hypnotised him. I don’t know where you come from nor who
you are, but I warn you I’m not going to see the old boy made a fool of much longer.”
“But he’s not being made a fool of. He’s simply beginning to dream of a world outside his
knowledge —”
“It won’t do,” said Crump. “I’m not one of the dupe class. You are either of two things —
a lunatic at large (which I don’t believe), or a knave. Nothing else is possible. I think I know a
little of this world, whatever I do of yours. Very well. If you don’t leave Hillyer alone I shall
communicate with the police, and either clap you into a prison, if you go back on your story, or
into a madhouse if you don’t. It’s stretching a point, but I swear I’d certify you insane
tomorrow to get you out of the village. It’s not only the Vicar. As you know. I hope that’s plain.
Now what have you to say?”
With an affectation of great calm, the Doctor took out his penknife and began to dig the
blade into his pipe bowl. His pipe had gone out during this last speech.
For a moment neither spoke. The Angel looked about him with a face that grew pale. The
Doctor extracted a plug of tobacco from his pipe and flung it away, shut his penknife and put it
in his waistcoat pocket. He had not meant to speak quite so emphatically, but speech alwayswarmed him.
“Prison,” said the Angel. “Madhouse! Let me see.” Then he remembered the Vicar’s
explanation. “Not that!” he said. He approached Crump with eyes dilated and hands
“I knew you would know what those things meant at any rate. Sit down,” said Crump,
indicating the tree trunk beside him by a movement of the head.
The Angel, shivering, sat down on the tree trunk and stared at the Doctor.
Crump was getting out his pouch. “You are a strange man,” said the Angel. “Your beliefs
are like — a steel trap.”
“They are,” said Crump — flattered.
“But I tell you — I assure you the thing is so — I know nothing, or at least remember
nothing of anything I knew of this world before I found myself in the darkness of night on the
moorland above Sidderford.”
“Where did you learn the language then?”
“I don’t know. Only I tell you — But I haven’t an atom of the sort of proof that would
convince you.”
“And you really,” said Crump, suddenly coming round upon him and looking into his eyes;
“You really believe you were eternally in a kind of glorious heaven before then?”
“I do,” said the Angel.
“Pshaw!” said Crump, and lit his pipe. He sat smoking, elbow on knee, for some time,
and the Angel sat and watched him. Then his face grew less troubled.
“It is just possible,” he said to himself rather than to the Angel, and began another piece
of silence.
“You see;” he said, when that was finished. “There is such a thing as double
personality... A man sometimes forgets who he is and thinks he is someone else. Leaves
home, friends, and everything, and leads a double life. There was a case in Nature only a
month or so ago. The man was sometimes English and right-handed, and sometimes Welsh
and left-handed. When he was English he knew no Welsh, when he was Welsh he knew no
English... H’m.”
He turned suddenly on the Angel and said “Home!” He fancied he might revive in the
Angel some latent memory of his lost youth. He went on “Dadda, Pappa, Daddy, Mammy,
Pappy, Father, Dad, Governor, Old Boy, Mother, dear Mother, Ma, Mumsy... No good? What
are you laughing at?”
“Nothing,” said the Angel. “You surprised me a little — that is all. A week ago I should
have been puzzled by that vocabulary.”
For a minute Crump rebuked the Angel silently out of the corner of his eye.
“You have such an ingenuous face. You almost force me to believe you. You are
certainly not an ordinary lunatic. Your mind — except for your isolation from the past —
seems balanced enough. I wish Nordau or Lombroso or some of these Saltpetriere men could
have a look at you. Down here one gets no practice worth speaking about in mental cases.
There’s one idiot — and he’s just a damned idiot of an idiot —; all the rest are thoroughly sane
“Possibly that accounts for their behaviour,” said the Angel thoughtfully.
“But to consider your general position here,” said Crump, ignoring his comment, “I really
regard you as a bad influence here. These fancies are contagious. It is not simply the Vicar.
There is a man named Shine has caught the fad, and he has been in the drink for a week, off
and on, and offering to fight anyone who says you are not an Angel. Then a man over at
Sidderford is, I hear, affected with a kind of religious mania on the same tack. These things
spread. There ought to be a quarantine in mischievous ideas. And I have heard another
“But what can I do?” said the Angel. “Suppose I am (quite unintentionally) doingmischief...”
“You can leave the village,” said Crump.
“Then I shall only go into another village.”
“That’s not my affair,” said Crump. “Go where you like. Only go. Leave these three
people, the Vicar, Shine, the little servant-girl, whose heads are all spinning with galaxies of
“But,” said the Angel, “Face your world! I tell you I can’t. And leave Delia! I don’t
understand... I do not know how to set about getting Work and Food and Shelter. And I am
growing afraid of human beings...”
“Fancies, fancies,” said Crump, watching him, “mania.”
“It’s no good my persisting in worrying you,” he said suddenly, “but certainly the situation
is impossible as it stands.” He stood up with a jerk.
“Good-morning, Mr. — Angel,” he said, “the long and the short of it is — I say it as the
medical adviser of this parish — you are an unhealthy influence. We can’t have you. You must
He turned, and went striding through the grass towards the roadway, leaving the Angel
sitting disconsolately on the tree trunk. “An unhealthy influence,” said the Angel slowly, staring
blankly in front of him, and trying to realise what it meant.
Chapter 42 — Sir John Gotch Acts

Sir John Gotch was a little man with scrubby hair, a small, thin nose sticking out of a face
cracked with wrinkles, tight brown gaiters, and a riding whip. “I’ve come, you see,” he said, as
Mrs. Hinijer closed the door.
“Thank you,” said the Vicar, “I’m obliged to you. I’m really obliged to you.”
“Glad to be of any service to you,” said Sir John Gotch. (Angular attitude.)
“This business,” said the Vicar, “this unfortunate business of the barbed wire — is really,
you know, a most unfortunate business.”
Sir John Gotch became decidedly more angular in his attitude. “It is,” he said.
“This Mr. Angel being my guest —”
“No reason why he should cut my wire,” said Sir John Gotch, briefly.
“None whatever.”
“May I ask who this Mr. Angel is?” asked Sir John Gotch with the abruptness of long
The Vicar’s fingers jumped to his chin. What was the good of talking to a man like Sir
John Gotch about Angels?
“To tell you the exact truth,” said the Vicar, “there is a little secret —”
“Lady Hammergallow told me as much.”
The Vicar’s face suddenly became bright red.
“Do you know,” said Sir John, with scarcely a pause, “he’s been going about this village
preaching Socialism?”
“Good heavens!” said the Vicar, “No!”
“He has. He has been buttonholing every yokel he came across, and asking them why
they had to work, while we — I and you, you know — did nothing. He has been saying we
ought to educate every man up to your level and mine — out of the rates, I suppose, as
usual. He has been suggesting that we — I and you, you know — keep these people down —
pith ‘em.”
“Dear me!” said the Vicar, “I had no idea.”
“He has done this wire-cutting as a demonstration, I tell you, as a Socialistic
demonstration. If we don’t come down on him pretty sharply, I tell you, we shall have the
palings down in Flinders Lane next, and the next thing will be ricks afire, and every damned (I
beg your pardon, Vicar. I know I’m too fond of that word), every blessed pheasant’s egg in the
parish smashed. I know these —”
“A Socialist,” said the Vicar, quite put out, “I had no idea.”
“You see why I am inclined to push matters against our gentleman though he is your
guest. It seems to me he has been taking advantage of your paternal —”
“Oh, not paternal!” said the Vicar. “Really —”
“(I beg your pardon, Vicar it was a slip.) Of your kindness, to go mischief-making
everywhere, setting class against class, and the poor man against his bread and butter.”
The Vicar’s fingers were at his chin again.
“So there’s one of two things,” said Sir John Gotch. “Either that Guest of yours leaves
the parish, or — I take proceedings. That’s final.”
The Vicar’s mouth was all askew.
“That’s the position,” said Sir John, jumping to his feet, “if it were not for you, I should
take proceedings at once. As it is — am I to take proceedings or no?”
“You see,” said the Vicar in horrible perplexity.
“Well?”“Arrangements have to be made.”
“He’s a mischief-making idler... I know the breed. But I’ll give you a week “
“Thank you,” said the Vicar. “I understand your position. I perceive the situation is getting
“Sorry to give you this bother, of course,” said Sir John.
“A week,” said the Vicar.
“A week,” said Sir John, leaving.
The Vicar remained sitting before his desk in his study. “A week!” he said after an
immense silence. “Here is an Angel, a glorious Angel, who has quickened my soul to beauty
and delight, who has opened my eyes to Wonderland, and something more than
Wonderland,... and I have promised to get rid of him in a week! What are we men made of?...
How can I tell him?”
He began to walk up and down the room, then he went into the dining-room, and stood
staring blankly out at the cornfield. The table was already laid for lunch. Presently he turned,
still dreaming, and almost mechanically helped himself to a glass of sherry.
Chapter 43 — The Sea Cliff

The Angel lay upon the summit of the cliff above Bandram Bay, and stared out at the
glittering sea. Sheer from under his elbows fell the cliff, five hundred and seven feet of it down
to the datum line, and the sea-birds eddied and soared below him. The upper part of the cliff
was a greenish chalky rock, the lower two-thirds a warm red, marbled with gypsum bands,
and from half-a-dozen places spurted jets of water, to fall in long cascades down its face. The
swell frothed white on the flinty beach, and the water beyond where the shadows of an
outstanding rock lay, was green and purple in a thousand tints and marked with streaks and
flakes of foam. The air was full of sunlight and the tinkling of the little waterfalls and the slow
soughing of the seas below. Now and then a butterfly flickered over the face of the cliff, and a
multitude of sea-birds perched and flew hither and thither.
The Angel lay with his crippled, shrivelled wings humped upon his back, watching the
gulls and jackdaws and rooks, circling in the sunlight, soaring, eddying, sweeping down to the
water or upward into the dazzling blue of the sky. Long the Angel lay there and watched them
going to and fro on outspread wings. He watched, and as he watched them he remembered
with infinite longing the rivers of starlight and the sweetness of the land from which he came.
And a gull came gliding overhead, swiftly and easily, with its broad wings spreading white and
fair against the blue. And suddenly a shadow came into the Angel’s eyes, the sunlight left
them, he thought of his own crippled pinions, and put his face upon his arm and wept.
A woman who was walking along the footpath across the Cliff Field saw only a twisted
hunch-back dressed in the Vicar of Siddermorton’s cast-off clothes, sprawling foolishly at the
edge of the cliff and with his forehead on his arm. She looked at him and looked again. “The
silly creature has gone to sleep,” she said, and though she had a heavy basket to carry, came
towards him with an idea of waking him up. But as she drew near she saw his shoulders
heave and heard the sound of his sobbing.
She stood still a minute, and her features twitched into a kind of grin. Then treading softly
she turned and went back towards the pathway. “‘Tis so hard to think of anything to say,” she
said. “Poor afflicted soul!”
Presently the Angel ceased sobbing, and stared with a tear-stained face at the beach
below him.
“This world,” he said, “wraps me round and swallows me up. My wings grow shrivelled
and useless. Soon I shall be nothing more than a crippled man, and I shall age, and bow
myself to pain, and die... I am miserable. And I am alone.”
Then he rested his chin on his hands upon the edge of the cliff, and began to think of
Delia’s face with the light in her eyes. The Angel felt a curious desire to go to her and tell her
of his withered wings. To place his arms about her and weep for the land he had lost. “Delia!”
he said to himself very softly. And presently a cloud drove in front of the sun.
Chapter 44 — Mrs. Hinijer Acts

Mrs. Hinijer surprised the Vicar by tapping at his study door after tea. “Begging your
pardon, Sir,” said Mrs. Hinijer. “But might I make so bold as to speak to you for a moment?”
“Certainly, Mrs. Hinijer,” said the Vicar, little dreaming of the blow that was coming. He
held a letter in his hand, a very strange and disagreeable letter from his bishop, a letter that
irritated and distressed him, criticising in the strongest language the guests he chose to
entertain in his own house. Only a popular bishop living in a democratic age, a bishop who
was still half a pedagogue, could have written such a letter.
Mrs. Hinijer coughed behind her hand and struggled with some respiratory
disorganisation. The Vicar fel’t apprehensive. Usually in their interviews he was the most
disconcerted. Invariably so when the interview ended.
“Well? “he said.
“May I make so bold, sir, as to arst when Mr. Angel is a-going?” (Cough.)
The Vicar started. “To ask when Mr. Angel is going?” he repeated slowly to gain time.
“I’m sorry, sir. But I’ve been used to waitin’ on gentlefolks, sir; and you’d hardly imagine
how it feels quite to wait on such as ‘im.”
“Such as... ‘im! Do I understand you, Mrs. Hinijer, that you don’t like Mr. Angel?”
“You see, sir, before I came to you, sir, I was at Lord Dundoller’s seventeen years, and
you, sir — if you will excuse me — are a perfect gentleman yourself, sir — though in the
Church. And then...”
“Dear, dear!” said the Vicar. “And don’t you regard Mr. Angel as a gentleman?”
“I’m sorry to ‘ave to say it, sir.”
“But what...? Dear me! Surely!”
“I’m sorry to ‘ave to say it, sir. But when a party goes turning vegetarian suddenly and
putting out all the cooking, and hasn’t no proper luggage of his own, and borry’s shirts and
socks from his ‘ost, and don’t know no better than to try his knife at peas (as I seed my very
self), and goes talking in odd corners to the housemaids, and folds up his napkin after meals,
and eats with his fingers at minced veal, and plays the fiddle in the middle of the night keeping
everybody awake, and stares and grins at his elders a-getting upstairs, and generally
misconducts himself with things that I can scarcely tell you all, one can’t help thinking, sir.
Thought is free, sir, and one can’t help coming to one’s own conclusions. Besides which, there
is talk all over the village about him — what with one thing and another. I know a gentleman
when I sees a gentleman, and I know a gentleman when I don’t see a gentleman, and me,
and Susan, and George, we’ve talked it over, being the upper servants, so to speak, and
experienced, and leaving out that girl Delia, who I only hope won’t come to any harm through
him, and depend upon it, sir, that Mr. Angel ain’t what you think he is, sir, and the sooner he
leaves this house the better.”
Mrs. Hinijer ceased abruptly and stood panting but stern, and with her eyes grimly fixed
on the Vicar’s face.
“Really, Mrs. Hinijer!” said the Vicar, and then, “Oh Lord!”
“What have I done?” said the Vicar, suddenly starting up and appealing to the inexorable
fates. “What HAVE I done?”
“There’s no knowing,” said Mrs. Hinijer. “Though a deal of talk in the village.”
“Bother!” said the Vicar, going and staring out of the window. Then he turned. “Look
here, Mrs. Hinijer! Mr. Angel will be leaving this house in the course of a week. Is that
enough?”“Quite,” said Mrs. Hinijer. “And I feel sure, sir...”
The Vicar’s eyes fell with unwonted eloquence upon the door.
Chapter 45 — The Angel in Trouble

“The fact is,” said the Vicar, “this is no world for Angels.”
The blinds had not been drawn, and the twilight outer world under an overcast sky
seemed unspeakably grey and cold. The Angel sat at table in dejected silence. His inevitable
departure had been proclaimed. Since his presence hurt people and made the Vicar wretched
he acquiesced in the justice of the decision, but what would happen to him after his plunge he
could not imagine. Something very disagreeable certainly.
“There is the violin,” said the Vicar. “Only after our experience —”
“I must get you clothes — a general outfit — Dear me! you don’t understand railway
travelling! And coinage! Taking lodgings! Eating-houses! — I must come up at least and see
you settled. Get work for you. But an Angel in London! Working for his living! That grey cold
wilderness of people! What will become of you? If I had one friend in the world I could trust to
believe me!”
“I ought not to be sending you away —”
“Do not trouble overmuch for me, my friend,” said the Angel. “At least this life of yours
ends. And there are things in it. There is something in this life of yours — Your care for me! I
thought there was nothing beautiful at all in life —”
“And I have betrayed you!” said the Vicar, with a sudden wave of remorse. “Why did I not
face them all — say, ‘This is the best of life’? What do these everyday things matter?”
He stopped suddenly. “What do they matter?” he said.
“I have only come into your life to trouble it,” said the Angel.
“Don’t say that,” said the Vicar. “You have come into my life to awaken me. I have been
dreaming — dreaming. Dreaming this was necessary and that. Dreaming that this narrow
prison was the world. And the dream still hangs about me and troubles me. That is all. Even
your departure —. Am I not dreaming that you must go?”
When he was in bed that night the mystical aspect of the case came still more forcibly
before the Vicar. He lay awake and had the most horrible visions of his sweet and delicate
visitor drifting through this unsympathetic world and happening upon the cruellest
misadventures. His guest was an Angel assuredly. He tried to go over the whole story of the
past eight days again. He thought of the hot afternoon, the shot fired out of sheer surprise,
the fluttering iridescent wings, the beautiful saffron-robed figure upon the ground. How
wonderful that had seemed to him! Then his mind turned to the things he had heard of the
other world, to the dreams the violin had conjured up, to the vague, fluctuating, wonderful
cities of the Angelic Land. He tried to recall the forms of the buildings, the shapes of the fruits
upon the trees, the aspect of the winged shapes that traversed its ways. They grew from a
memory into a present reality, grew every moment just a little more vivid and his troubles a
little less immediate; and so, softly and quietly, the Vicar slipped out of his troubles and
perplexities into the Land of Dreams.
Chapter 46

Delia sat with her window open, hoping to hear the Angel play. But that night there was
to be no playing. The sky was overcast, yet not so thickly but that the moon was visible. High
up a broken cloud-lace drove across the sky, and now the moon was a hazy patch of light,
and now it was darkened, and now rode clear and bright and sharply outlined against the blue
gulf of night. And presently she heard the door into the garden opening, and a figure came out
under the drifting pallor of the moonlight.
It was the Angel. But he wore once more the saffron robe in the place of his formless
overcoat. In the uncertain light this garment had only a colourless shimmer, and his wings
behind him seemed a leaden grey. He began taking short runs, flapping his wings and leaping,
going to and fro amidst the drifting patches of light and the shadows of the trees. Delia
watched him in amazement. He gave a despondent cry, leaping higher. His shrivelled wings
flashed and fell. A thicker patch in the cloud-film made everything obscure. He seemed to
spring five or six feet from the ground and fall clumsily. She saw him in the dimness crouching
on the ground and then she heard him sobbing.
“He’s hurt!” said Delia, pressing her lips together hard and staring. “I ought to help him.”
She hesitated, then stood up and flitted swiftly towards the door, went slipping quietly
downstairs and out into the moonlight. The Angel still lay upon the lawn, and sobbed for utter
“Oh! what is the matter?” said Delia, stooping over him and touching his head timidly.
The Angel ceased sobbing, set up abruptly, and stared at her. He saw her face, moonlit,
and soft with pity. “What is the matter?” she whispered. “Are you hurt?”
The Angel stared about him, and his eyes came to rest on her face. “Delia!” he
“Are you hurt?” said Delia.
“My wings,” said the Angel. “I cannot use my wings.”
Delia did not understand, but she realised that it was something very dreadful. “It is dark,
it is cold,” said the Angel; “I cannot use my wings.”
It hurt her unaccountably to see the tears on his face. She did not know what to do.
“Pity me, Delia,” said the Angel, suddenly extending his arms towards her; “pity me.”
Impulsively she knelt down and took his face between her hands. “I do not know,” she
said; “but I am sorry. I am sorry for you, with all my heart.”
The Angel said not a word. He was looking at her little face in the bright moonlight, with
an expression of uncomprehending wonder in his eyes. “This strange world!” he said.
She suddenly withdrew her hands. A cloud drove over the moon. “What can I do to help
you?” she whispered. “I would do anything to help you.”
He still held her at arm’s length, perplexity replacing misery in his face. “This strange
world!” he repeated.
Both whispered, she kneeling, he sitting, in the fluctuating moonlight and darkness of the
“Delia!” said Mrs. Hinijer, suddenly projecting from her window; “Delia, is that you?”
They both looked up at her window in consternation.
“Come in at once, Delia,” said Mrs. Hinijer. “If that Mr. Angel was a gentleman (which he
isn’t), he’d feel ashamed of hisself. And you an orphan too!”
Chapter 47 — The Last Day of the Visit

On the morning of the next day the Angel, after he had breakfasted, went out towards
the moor, and Mrs. Hinijer had an interview with the Vicar. What happened need not concern
us now. The Vicar was visibly disconcerted. “He must go,” he said; “certainly he must go,” and
straightway he forgot the particular accusation in the general trouble. He spent the morning in
hazy meditation, interspersed by a spasmodic study of Skiff and Waterlow’s price list, and the
catalogue of the Medical, Scholastic, and Clerical Stores. A schedule grew slowly on a sheet
of paper that lay on the desk before him. He cut out a self-measurement form from the
tailoring department of the Stores and pinned it to the study curtains. This was the kind of
document he was making:

1 Black Melton Frock Coat, patts? ₤3, 10s.
? Trousers. 2 pairs or one. 224
1 Cheviot Tweed Suit (write for patterns. Self-meas.?)

The Vicar spent some time studying a pleasing army of model gentlemen. They were all
very nice-looking, but he found it hard to imagine the Angel so transfigured. For, although six
days had passed, the Angel remained without any suit of his own. The Vicar had vacillated
between a project of driving the Angel into Portburdock and getting him measured for a suit,
and his absolute horror of the insinuating manners of the tailor he employed. He knew that
tailor would demand an exhaustive explanation. Besides which, one never knew when the
Angel might leave. So the six days had passed, and the Angel had grown steadily in the
wisdom of this world and shrouded his brightness still in the ample retirement of the Vicar’s
newest clothes.

1 Soft Felt Hat, No. G. 7 (say), 8s 6d.
1 Silk Hat, 14s 6d. Hatbox?

(“I suppose he ought to have a silk hat,” said the Vicar; “it’s the correct thing up there.
Shape No. 3 seems best suited to his style. But it’s dreadful to think of him all alone in that
great city. Everyone will misunderstand him, and he will misunderstand everybody. However, I
suppose it must be. Where was I?”)

1 Toothbrush. 1 Brush and Comb. Razor?
½ doz. Shirts (? measure his neck), 6s ea.
Socks? Pants?
2 suits Pyjamas. Price? Say 15s.
1 doz. Collars (‘The Life Guardsman’), 8s.
Braces. Oxon Patent Versatile, 1s 11½d.

(“But how will he get them on?” said the Vicar.)

1 Rubber Stamp, T. Angel, and Marking Ink in box complete, 9d.

“Those washerwomen are certain to steal all his things.”

1 Single-blade Penknife with Corkscrew, say 1s6d.N.B. — Don’t forget Cuff Links, Collar Stud, &c.

(The Vicar loved “&c.”, it gave things such a precise and business-like air.)

1 Leather Portmanteau (had better see these).

And so forth — meanderingly. It kept the Vicar busy until lunch time, though his heart
The Angel did not return to lunch. This was not so very remarkable — once before he
had missed the midday meal. Yet, considering how short was the time they would have
together now, he might perhaps have come back. Doubtless he has excellent reasons,
though, for his absence. The Vicar made an indifferent lunch. In the afternoon he rested in his
usual manner, and did a little more to the list of requirements. He did not begin to feel nervous
about the Angel till tea-time. He waited, perhaps, half an hour before he took tea. “Odd,” said
the Vicar, feeling still more lonely as he drank his tea.
As the time for dinner crept on and no Angel appeared the Vicar’s imagination began to
trouble him. “He will come in to dinner, surely,” said the Vicar, caressing his chin, and
beginning to fret about the house upon inconsiderable errands, as his habit was when
anything occurred to break his routine. The sun set, a gorgeous spectacle, amidst tumbled
masses of purple cloud. The gold and red faded into twilight; the evening star gathered her
robe of light together from out the brightness of the sky in the West. Breaking the silence of
evening that crept over the outer world, a corncrake began his whirring chant. The Vicar’s
face grew troubled; twice he went and stared at the darkening hillside, and then fretted back
to the house again. Mrs. Hinijer served dinner. “Your dinner’s ready,” she announced for the
second time, with a reproachful intonation. “Yes, yes,” said the Vicar, fussing off upstairs.
He came down and went into his study and lit his reading lamp, a patent affair with an
incandescent wick, dropping the match into his waste-paper basket without stopping to see if
it was extinguished. Then he fretted into the dining-room and began a desultory attack on the
cooling dinner...
(Dear Reader, the time is almost ripe to say farewell to this little Vicar of ours.)
Chapter 48

Sir John Gotch (still smarting over the business of the barbed wire) was riding along one
of the grassy ways through the preserves by the Bidder, when he saw, strolling slowly through
the trees beyond the undergrowth, the one particular human being he did not want to see.
“I’m damned,” said Sir John Gotch, with immense emphasis; “if this isn’t altogether too
He raised himself in the stirrups. “Hi!” he shouted. “You there!”
The Angel turned smiling.
“Get out of this wood!” said Sir John Gotch.
“Why?” said the Angel.
“I’m —” said Sir John Gotch, meditating some cataclysmal expletive. But he could think
of nothing more than “damned.”
“Get out of this wood,” he said.
The Angel’s smile vanished. “Why should I get out of this wood?” he said, and stood still.
Neither spoke for a full half minute perhaps, and then Sir John Gotch dropped out of his
saddle and stood by the horse.
(Now you must remember — lest the Angelic Hosts be discredited hereby — that this
Angel had been breathing the poisonous air of this Struggle for Existence of ours for more
than a week. It was not only his wings and the brightness of his face that suffered. He had
eaten and slept and learnt the lesson of pain — had travelled so far on the road to humanity.
All the length of his Visit he had been meeting more and more of the harshness and conflict of
this world, and losing touch with the glorious altitudes of his own.)
“You won’t go, eigh!” said Gotch, and began to lead his horse through the bushes
towards the Angel. The Angel stood, all his muscles tight and his nerves quivering, watching
his antagonist approach.
“Get out of this wood,” said Gotch, stopping three yards away, his face white with rage,
his bridle in one hand and his riding whip in the other.
Strange floods of emotion were running through the Angel. “Who are you,” he said, in a
low quivering voice; “who am I— that you should order me out of this place? What has the
World done that men like you...”
“You’re the fool who cut my barbed wire,” said Gotch, threatening, “if you want to know!”
“Your barbed wire,” said the Angel. “Was that your barbed wire? Are you the man who
put down that barbed wire? What right have you...”
“Don’t you go talking Socialist rot,” said Gotch in short gasps. “This wood’s mine, and I’ve
a right to protect it how I can. I know your kind of muck. Talking rot and stirring up discontent.
And if you don’t get out of it jolly sharp...”
“Well!” said the Angel, a brimming reservoir of unaccountable energy.
“Get out of this damned wood!” said Gotch, flashing into the bully out of sheer alarm at
the light in the Angel’s face.
He made one step towards him, with the whip raised, and then something happened that
neither he nor the Angel properly understood. The Angel seemed to leap into the air, a pair of
grey wings flashed out at the Squire, he saw a face bearing down upon him, full of the wild
beauty of passionate anger. His riding whip was torn out of his hand. His horse reared behind
him, pulled him over, gained his bridle and fled.
The whip cut across his face as he fell back, stung across his face again as he sat on the
ground. He saw the Angel, radiant with anger, in the act to strike again. Gotch flung up his
hands, pitched himself forward to save his eyes, and rolled on the ground under the pitilessfury of the blows that rained down upon him.
“You brute,” cried the Angel, striking wherever he saw flesh to feel. “You bestial thing of
pride and lies! You who have overshadowed the souls of other men. You shallow fool with
your horses and dogs! To lift your face against any living thing! Learn! Learn! Learn!”
Gotch began screaming for help. Twice he tried to clamber to his feet, got to his knees,
and went headlong again under the ferocious anger of the Angel. Presently he made a
strange noise in his throat, and ceased even to writhe under his punishment.
Then suddenly the Angel awakened from his wrath, and found himself standing, panting
and trembling, one foot on a motionless figure, under the green stillness of the sunlit woods.
He stared about him, then down at his feet where, among the tangled dead leaves, the
hair was matted with blood. The whip dropped from his hands, the hot colour fled from his
face. “Pain!” he said. “Why does he lie so still?”
He took his foot off Gotch’s shoulder, bent down towards the prostrate figure, stood
listening, knelt shook him. “Awake!” said the Angel. Then still more softly, “Awake!”
He remained listening some minutes or more, stood up sharply, and looked round him at
the silent trees. A feeling of profound horror descended upon him, wrapped him round about.
With an abrupt gesture he turned. “What has happened to me?” he said, in an awe-stricken
He started back from the motionless figure. “Dead!” he said suddenly, and turning, panic
stricken, fled headlong through the wood.
Chapter 49

It was some minutes after the footsteps of the Angel had died away in the distance that
Gotch raised himself on his hand. “By Jove!” he said. “Crump’s right.”
“Cut at the head, too!”
He put his hand to his face and felt the two weals running across it, hot and fat. “I’ll think
twice before I lift my hand against a lunatic again,” said Sir John Gotch.
“He may be a person of weak intellect, but I’m damned if he hasn’t a pretty strong arm.
Phew! He’s cut a bit clean off the top of my ear with that infernal lash.
“That infernal horse will go galloping to the house in the approved dramatic style. Little
Madam’ll be scared out of her wits. And I... I shall have to explain how it all happened. While
she vivisects me with questions.
“I’m a jolly good mind to have spring guns and man-traps put in this preserve. Confound
the Law!”
Chapter 50

But the Angel, thinking that Gotch was dead, went wandering off in a passion of remorse
and fear through the brakes and copses along the Sidder. You can scarcely imagine how
appalled he was at this last and overwhelming proof of his encroaching humanity. All the
darkness, passion and pain of life seemed closing in upon him, inexorably, becoming part of
him, chaining him to all that a week ago he had found strange and pitiful in men.
“Truly, this is no world for an Angel!” said the Angel. “It is a World of War, a World of
Pain, a World of Death. Anger comes upon one... I, who know not pain and anger, stand here
with blood stains on my hands. I have fallen. To come into this world is to fall. One must
hunger and thirst and be tormented with a thousand desires. One must fight for foothold, be
angry and strike —”
He lifted up his hands to Heaven, the ultimate bitterness of helpless remorse in his face,
and then flung them down with a gesture of despair. The prison walls of this narrow
passionate life seemed creeping in upon him, certainly and steadily, to crush him presently
altogether. He felt what all we poor mortals have to feel sooner or later — the pitiless force of
the Things that Must Be, not only without us but (where the real trouble lies) within, all the
inevitable tormenting of one’s high resolves, those inevitable seasons when the better self is
forgotten. But with us it is a gentle descent, made by imperceptible degrees over a long space
of years; with him it was the horrible discovery of one short week. He felt he was being
crippled, caked over, blinded, stupefied in the wrappings of this life, he felt as a man might
feel who has taken some horrible poison, and feels destruction spreading within him.
He took no account of hunger or fatigue or the flight of time. On and on he went,
avoiding houses and roads, turning away from the sight and sound of a human being in a
wordless desperate argument with Fate. His thoughts did not flow but stood banked back in
inarticulate remonstrance against his degradation. Chance directed his footsteps homeward
and, at last, after nightfall, he found himself faint and weary and wretched, stumbling along
over the moor at the back of Siddermorton. He heard the rats run and squeal in the heather,
and once a noiseless big bird came out of the darkness, passed, and vanished again. And he
saw without noticing it a dull red glow in the sky before him.
Chapter 51

But when he came over the brow of the moor, a vivid light sprang up before him and
refused to be ignored. He came on down the hill and speedily saw more distinctly what the
glare was. It came from darting and trembling tongues of fire, golden and red, that shot from
the windows and a hole in the roof of the Vicarage. A cluster of black heads, all the village in
fact, except the fire-brigade — who were down at Aylmer’s Cottage trying to find the key of
the machine-house — came out in silhouette against the blaze. There was a roaring sound,
and a humming of voices, and presently a furious outcry. There was a shouting of “No! No!”
— “Come back!” and an inarticulate roar.
He began to run towards the burning house. He stumbled and almost fell, but he ran on.
He found black figures running about him. The flaring fire blew gustily this way and that, and
he smelt the smell of burning.
“She went in,” said one voice, “she went in.”
“The mad girl!” said another.
“Stand back! Stand back!” cried others.
He found himself thrusting through an excited, swaying crowd, all staring at the flames,
and with the red reflection in their eyes.
“Stand back!” said a labourer, clutching him.
“What is it?” said the Angel. “What does this mean?”
“There’s a girl in the house, and she can’t get out!”
“Went in after a fiddle,” said another.
“‘Tas hopeless,” he heard someone else say.
“I was standing near her. I heerd her. Says she: ‘I can get his fiddle.’ I heerd her — Just
like that! ‘I can get his fiddle.’”
For a moment the Angel stood staring. Then in a flash he saw it all, saw this grim little
world of battle and cruelty, transfigured in a splendour that outshone the Angelic Land,
suffused suddenly and insupportably glorious with the wonderful light of Love and
SelfSacrifice. He gave a strange cry, and before anyone could stop him, was running towards the
burning building. There were cries of “The Hunchback! The Fowener!”
The Vicar, whose scalded hand was being tied up, turned his head, and he and Crump
saw the Angel, a black outline against the intense, red glare of the doorway. It was the
sensation of the tenth of a second, yet both men could not have remembered that transitory
attitude more vividly had it been a picture they had studied for hours together. Then the Angel
was hidden by something massive (no one knew what) that fell, incandescent, across the
Chapter 52

There was a cry of “Delia” and no more. But suddenly the flames spurted out in a
blinding glare that shot upward to an immense height a blinding brilliance broken by a
thousand flickering gleams like the waving of swords. And a gust of sparks, flashing in a
thousand colours whirled up and vanished. Just then, and for a moment by some strange
accident, a rush of music like the swell of an organ, wove into the roaring of the flames.
The whole village standing in black knots heard the sound, except Gaffer Siddons who is
deaf — strange and beautiful it was, and then gone again. Lumpy Durgan, the idiot boy from
Sidderford, said it began and ended like the opening and shutting of a door.
But little Hetty Penzance had a pretty fancy of two figures with wings, that flashed up and
vanished among the flames.
(And after that it was she began to pine for the things she saw in her dreams, and was
abstracted and strange. It grieved her mother sorely at the time. She grew fragile, as though
she was fading out of the world, and her eyes had a strange, far-away look. She talked of
Angels and rainbow colours and golden wings, and was for ever singing an unmeaning
fragment of an air that nobody knew. Until Crump took her in hand and cured her with
fattening dietary, syrup of hypophosphites and cod liver oil.)
The Epilogue

And there the story of the Wonderful Visit ends. The Epilogue is in the mouth of Mrs.
Mendham. There stand two little white crosses in the Siddermorton churchyard, near together,
where the brambles come clambering over the stone wall. One is inscribed Thomas Angel and
the other Delia Hardy, and the dates of the deaths are the same. Really there is nothing
beneath them but the ashes of the Vicar’s stuffed ostrich. (You will remember the Vicar had
his ornithological side.) I noticed them when Mrs. Mendham was showing me the new De la
Beche monument. (Mendham has been Vicar since Hilyer died.) “The granite came from
somewhere in Scotland,” said Mrs. Mendham, “and cost ever so much — I forget how much
— but a wonderful lot! It’s quite the talk of the village.”
“Mother,” said Cissie Mendham, “you are stepping on a grave.”
“Dear me!” said Mrs. Mendham. “How heedless of me! And the cripple’s grave too. But
really you’ve no idea how much this monument cost them.”
“These two people, by the bye,” said Mrs. Mendham, “were killed when the old Vicarage
was burnt. It’s rather a strange story. He was a curious person, a hunchbacked fiddler, who
came from nobody knows where, and imposed upon the late Vicar to a frightful extent. He
played in a pretentious way by ear, and we found out afterwards that he did not know a note
of music — not a note. He was exposed before quite a lot of people. Among other things, he
seems to have been ‘carrying on,’ as people say, with one of the servants, a sly little drab...
But Mendham had better tell you all about it. The man was half-witted and curiously deformed.
It’s strange the fancies girls have.”
She looked sharply at Cissie, and Cissie blushed to the eyes.
“She was left in the house and he rushed into the flames in an attempt to save her. Quite
romantic isn’t it? He was rather clever with the fiddle in his uneducated way.
“All the poor Vicar’s stuffed skins were burned at the same time. It was almost all he
cared or. He never really got over the blow. He came to stop with us for there wasn’t another
house available in the village. But he never seemed to be happy. He seemed all shaken. I
never saw a man so changed. I tried to stir him up, but it was no good no good at all. He had
the queerest delusions about the Angels and that kind of thing. It made him odd company at
times. He would say he heard music, and stare quite stupidly at nothing for hours together. He
got quite careless about his dress... He died within a twelvemonth of the fire.”
The Island of Doctor Moreau
First published: 1896

Chapter 1 — In the Dingey of the “Lady Vain”

I do not propose to add anything to what has already been written concerning the loss of
the “Lady Vain.” As everyone knows, she collided with a derelict when ten days out from
Callao. The longboat, with seven of the crew, was picked up eighteen days after by H. M.
gunboat “Myrtle,” and the story of their terrible privations has become quite as well known as
the far more horrible “Medusa” case. But I have to add to the published story of the “Lady
Vain” another, possibly as horrible and far stranger. It has hitherto been supposed that the
four men who were in the dingey perished, but this is incorrect. I have the best of evidence for
this assertion: I was one of the four men.
But in the first place I must state that there never were four men in the dingey, — the
number was three. Constans, who was “seen by the captain to jump into the gig,” luckily for
us and unluckily for himself did not reach us. He came down out of the tangle of ropes under
the stays of the smashed bowsprit, some small rope caught his heel as he let go, and he hung
for a moment head downward, and then fell and struck a block or spar floating in the water.
We pulled towards him, but he never came up.
I say lucky for us he did not reach us, and I might almost say luckily for himself; for we
had only a small breaker of water and some soddened ship’s biscuits with us, so sudden had
been the alarm, so unprepared the ship for any disaster. We thought the people on the launch
would be better provisioned (though it seems they were not), and we tried to hail them. They
could not have heard us, and the next morning when the drizzle cleared, — which was not
until past midday, — we could see nothing of them. We could not stand up to look about us,
because of the pitching of the boat. The two other men who had escaped so far with me were
a man named Helmar, a passenger like myself, and a seaman whose name I don’t know, — a
short sturdy man, with a stammer.
We drifted famishing, and, after our water had come to an end, tormented by an
intolerable thirst, for eight days altogether. After the second day the sea subsided slowly to a
glassy calm. It is quite impossible for the ordinary reader to imagine those eight days. He has
not, luckily for himself, anything in his memory to imagine with. After the first day we said little
to one another, and lay in our places in the boat and stared at the horizon, or watched, with
eyes that grew larger and more haggard every day, the misery and weakness gaining upon
our companions. The sun became pitiless. The water ended on the fourth day, and we were
already thinking strange things and saying them with our eyes; but it was, I think, the sixth
before Helmar gave voice to the thing we had all been thinking. I remember our voices were
dry and thin, so that we bent towards one another and spared our words. I stood out against it
with all my might, was rather for scuttling the boat and perishing together among the sharks
that followed us; but when Helmar said that if his proposal was accepted we should have
drink, the sailor came round to him.
I would not draw lots however, and in the night the sailor whispered to Helmar again and
again, and I sat in the bows with my clasp-knife in my hand, though I doubt if I had the stuff in
me to fight; and in the morning I agreed to Helmar’s proposal, and we handed halfpence to
find the odd man. The lot fell upon the sailor; but he was the strongest of us and would not
abide by it, and attacked Helmar with his hands. They grappled together and almost stood up.
I crawled along the boat to them, intending to help Helmar by grasping the sailor’s leg; but the
sailor stumbled with the swaying of the boat, and the two fell upon the gunwale and rolled
overboard together. They sank like stones. I remember laughing at that, and wondering why I
laughed. The laugh caught me suddenly like a thing from without.
I lay across one of the thwarts for I know not how long, thinking that if I had the strengthI would drink sea-water and madden myself to die quickly. And even as I lay there I saw, with
no more interest than if it had been a picture, a sail come up towards me over the sky-line. My
mind must have been wandering, and yet I remember all that happened, quite distinctly. I
remember how my head swayed with the seas, and the horizon with the sail above it danced
up and down; but I also remember as distinctly that I had a persuasion that I was dead, and
that I thought what a jest it was that they should come too late by such a little to catch me in
my body.
For an endless period, as it seemed to me, I lay with my head on the thwart watching the
schooner (she was a little ship, schooner-rigged fore and aft) come up out of the sea. She
kept tacking to and fro in a widening compass, for she was sailing dead into the wind. It never
entered my head to attempt to attract attention, and I do not remember anything distinctly
after the sight of her side until I found myself in a little cabin aft. There’s a dim half-memory of
being lifted up to the gangway, and of a big red countenance covered with freckles and
surrounded with red hair staring at me over the bulwarks. I also had a disconnected
impression of a dark face, with extraordinary eyes, close to mine; but that I thought was a
nightmare, until I met it again. I fancy I recollect some stuff being poured in between my teeth;
and that is all.
Chapter 2 — The Man Who Was Going Nowhere

The cabin in which I found myself was small and rather untidy. A youngish man with
flaxen hair, a bristly straw-coloured moustache, and a dropping nether lip, was sitting and
holding my wrist. For a minute we stared at each other without speaking. He had watery grey
eyes, oddly void of expression. Then just overhead came a sound like an iron bedstead being
knocked about, and the low angry growling of some large animal. At the same time the man
spoke. He repeated his question, — “How do you feel now?”
I think I said I felt all right. I could not recollect how I had got there. He must have seen
the question in my face, for my voice was inaccessible to me.
“You were picked up in a boat, starving. The name on the boat was the ‘Lady Vain,’ and
there were spots of blood on the gunwale.”
At the same time my eye caught my hand, thin so that it looked like a dirty skin-purse full
of loose bones, and all the business of the boat came back to me.
“Have some of this,” said he, and gave me a dose of some scarlet stuff, iced.
It tasted like blood, and made me feel stronger.
“You were in luck,” said he, “to get picked up by a ship with a medical man aboard.” He
spoke with a slobbering articulation, with the ghost of a lisp.
“What ship is this?” I said slowly, hoarse from my long silence.
“It’s a little trader from Arica and Callao. I never asked where she came from in the
beginning, — out of the land of born fools, I guess. I’m a passenger myself, from Arica. The
silly ass who owns her, — he’s captain too, named Davies, — he’s lost his certificate, or
something. You know the kind of man, — calls the thing the ‘Ipecacuanha,’ of all silly, infernal
names; though when there’s much of a sea without any wind, she certainly acts according.”
(Then the noise overhead began again, a snarling growl and the voice of a human being
together. Then another voice, telling some “Heaven-forsaken idiot” to desist.)
“You were nearly dead,” said my interlocutor. “It was a very near thing, indeed. But I’ve
put some stuff into you now. Notice your arm’s sore? Injections. You’ve been insensible for
nearly thirty hours.”
I thought slowly. (I was distracted now by the yelping of a number of dogs.) “Am I eligible
for solid food?” I asked.
“Thanks to me,” he said. “Even now the mutton is boiling.”
“Yes,” I said with assurance; “I could eat some mutton.”
“But,” said he with a momentary hesitation, “you know I’m dying to hear of how you came
to be alone in that boat. Damn that howling!” I thought I detected a certain suspicion in his
He suddenly left the cabin, and I heard him in violent controversy with some one, who
seemed to me to talk gibberish in response to him. The matter sounded as though it ended in
blows, but in that I thought my ears were mistaken. Then he shouted at the dogs, and
returned to the cabin.
“Well?” said he in the doorway. “You were just beginning to tell me.”
I told him my name, Edward Prendick, and how I had taken to Natural History as a relief
from the dulness of my comfortable independence.
He seemed interested in this. “I’ve done some science myself. I did my Biology at
University College, — getting out the ovary of the earthworm and the radula of the snail, and
all that. Lord! It’s ten years ago. But go on! go on! tell me about the boat.”
He was evidently satisfied with the frankness of my story, which I told in concise
sentences enough, for I felt horribly weak; and when it was finished he reverted at once to thetopic of Natural History and his own biological studies. He began to question me closely about
Tottenham Court Road and Gower Street. “Is Caplatzi still flourishing? What a shop that was!”
He had evidently been a very ordinary medical student, and drifted incontinently to the topic of
the music halls. He told me some anecdotes.
“Left it all,” he said, “ten years ago. How jolly it all used to be! But I made a young ass of
myself, — played myself out before I was twenty-one. I daresay it’s all different now. But I
must look up that ass of a cook, and see what he’s done to your mutton.”
The growling overhead was renewed, so suddenly and with so much savage anger that it
startled me. “What’s that?” I called after him, but the door had closed. He came back again
with the boiled mutton, and I was so excited by the appetising smell of it that I forgot the noise
of the beast that had troubled me.
After a day of alternate sleep and feeding I was so far recovered as to be able to get
from my bunk to the scuttle, and see the green seas trying to keep pace with us. I judged the
schooner was running before the wind. Montgomery — that was the name of the flaxen-haired
man — came in again as I stood there, and I asked him for some clothes. He lent me some
duck things of his own, for those I had worn in the boat had been thrown overboard. They
were rather loose for me, for he was large and long in his limbs. He told me casually that the
captain was three-parts drunk in his own cabin. As I assumed the clothes, I began asking him
some questions about the destination of the ship. He said the ship was bound to Hawaii, but
that it had to land him first.
“Where?” said I.
“It’s an island, where I live. So far as I know, it hasn’t got a name.”
He stared at me with his nether lip dropping, and looked so wilfully stupid of a sudden
that it came into my head that he desired to avoid my questions. I had the discretion to ask no
Chapter 3 — The Strange Face

We left the cabin and found a man at the companion obstructing our way. He was
standing on the ladder with his back to us, peering over the combing of the hatchway. He was,
I could see, a misshapen man, short, broad, and clumsy, with a crooked back, a hairy neck,
and a head sunk between his shoulders. He was dressed in dark-blue serge, and had
peculiarly thick, coarse, black hair. I heard the unseen dogs growl furiously, and forthwith he
ducked back, — coming into contact with the hand I put out to fend him off from myself. He
turned with animal swiftness.
In some indefinable way the black face thus flashed upon me shocked me profoundly. It
was a singularly deformed one. The facial part projected, forming something dimly suggestive
of a muzzle, and the huge half-open mouth showed as big white teeth as I had ever seen in a
human mouth. His eyes were blood-shot at the edges, with scarcely a rim of white round the
hazel pupils. There was a curious glow of excitement in his face.
“Confound you!” said Montgomery. “Why the devil don’t you get out of the way?”
The black-faced man started aside without a word. I went on up the companion, staring
at him instinctively as I did so. Montgomery stayed at the foot for a moment. “You have no
business here, you know,” he said in a deliberate tone. “Your place is forward.”
The black-faced man cowered. “They — won’t have me forward.” He spoke slowly, with a
queer, hoarse quality in his voice.
“Won’t have you forward!” said Montgomery, in a menacing voice. “But I tell you to go!”
He was on the brink of saying something further, then looked up at me suddenly and followed
me up the ladder.
I had paused half way through the hatchway, looking back, still astonished beyond
measure at the grotesque ugliness of this black-faced creature. I had never beheld such a
repulsive and extraordinary face before, and yet — if the contradiction is credible — I
experienced at the same time an odd feeling that in some way I had already encountered
exactly the features and gestures that now amazed me. Afterwards it occurred to me that
probably I had seen him as I was lifted aboard; and yet that scarcely satisfied my suspicion of
a previous acquaintance. Yet how one could have set eyes on so singular a face and yet have
forgotten the precise occasion, passed my imagination.
Montgomery’s movement to follow me released my attention, and I turned and looked
about me at the flush deck of the little schooner. I was already half prepared by the sounds I
had heard for what I saw. Certainly I never beheld a deck so dirty. It was littered with scraps
of carrot, shreds of green stuff, and indescribable filth. Fastened by chains to the mainmast
were a number of grisly staghounds, who now began leaping and barking at me, and by the
mizzen a huge puma was cramped in a little iron cage far too small even to give it turning
room. Farther under the starboard bulwark were some big hutches containing a number of
rabbits, and a solitary llama was squeezed in a mere box of a cage forward. The dogs were
muzzled by leather straps. The only human being on deck was a gaunt and silent sailor at the
The patched and dirty spankers were tense before the wind, and up aloft the little ship
seemed carrying every sail she had. The sky was clear, the sun midway down the western
sky; long waves, capped by the breeze with froth, were running with us. We went past the
steersman to the taffrail, and saw the water come foaming under the stern and the bubbles go
dancing and vanishing in her wake. I turned and surveyed the unsavoury length of the ship.
“Is this an ocean menagerie?” said I.
“Looks like it,” said Montgomery.“What are these beasts for? Merchandise, curios? Does the captain think he is going to
sell them somewhere in the South Seas?”
“It looks like it, doesn’t it?” said Montgomery, and turned towards the wake again.
Suddenly we heard a yelp and a volley of furious blasphemy from the companion
hatchway, and the deformed man with the black face came up hurriedly. He was immediately
followed by a heavy red-haired man in a white cap. At the sight of the former the staghounds,
who had all tired of barking at me by this time, became furiously excited, howling and leaping
against their chains. The black hesitated before them, and this gave the red-haired man time
to come up with him and deliver a tremendous blow between the shoulder-blades. The poor
devil went down like a felled ox, and rolled in the dirt among the furiously excited dogs. It was
lucky for him that they were muzzled. The red-haired man gave a yawp of exultation and
stood staggering, and as it seemed to me in serious danger of either going backwards down
the companion hatchway or forwards upon his victim.
So soon as the second man had appeared, Montgomery had started forward. “Steady on
there!” he cried, in a tone of remonstrance. A couple of sailors appeared on the forecastle.
The black-faced man, howling in a singular voice rolled about under the feet of the dogs. No
one attempted to help him. The brutes did their best to worry him, butting their muzzles at
him. There was a quick dance of their lithe grey-figured bodies over the clumsy, prostrate
figure. The sailors forward shouted, as though it was admirable sport. Montgomery gave an
angry exclamation, and went striding down the deck, and I followed him. The black-faced man
scrambled up and staggered forward, going and leaning over the bulwark by the main
shrouds, where he remained, panting and glaring over his shoulder at the dogs. The
redhaired man laughed a satisfied laugh.
“Look here, Captain,” said Montgomery, with his lisp a little accentuated, gripping the
elbows of the red-haired man, “this won’t do!”
I stood behind Montgomery. The captain came half round, and regarded him with the dull
and solemn eyes of a drunken man. “Wha’ won’t do?” he said, and added, after looking
sleepily into Montgomery’s face for a minute, “Blasted Sawbones!”
With a sudden movement he shook his arm free, and after two ineffectual attempts stuck
his freckled fists into his side pockets.
“That man’s a passenger,” said Montgomery. “I’d advise you to keep your hands off
“Go to hell!” said the captain, loudly. He suddenly turned and staggered towards the side.
“Do what I like on my own ship,” he said.
I think Montgomery might have left him then, seeing the brute was drunk; but he only
turned a shade paler, and followed the captain to the bulwarks.
“Look you here, Captain,” he said; “that man of mine is not to be ill-treated. He has been
hazed ever since he came aboard.”
For a minute, alcoholic fumes kept the captain speechless. “Blasted Sawbones!” was all
he considered necessary.
I could see that Montgomery had one of those slow, pertinacious tempers that will warm
day after day to a white heat, and never again cool to forgiveness; and I saw too that this
quarrel had been some time growing. “The man’s drunk,” said I, perhaps officiously; “you’ll do
no good.”
Montgomery gave an ugly twist to his dropping lip. “He’s always drunk. Do you think that
excuses his assaulting his passengers?”
“My ship,” began the captain, waving his hand unsteadily towards the cages, “was a
clean ship. Look at it now!” It was certainly anything but clean. “Crew,” continued the captain,
“clean, respectable crew.”
“You agreed to take the beasts.”
“I wish I’d never set eyes on your infernal island. What the devil — want beasts for on anisland like that? Then, that man of yours — understood he was a man. He’s a lunatic; and he
hadn’t no business aft. Do you think the whole damned ship belongs to you?”
“Your sailors began to haze the poor devil as soon as he came aboard.”
“That’s just what he is — he’s a devil! an ugly devil! My men can’t stand him. I can’t
stand him. None of us can’t stand him. Nor you either!”
Montgomery turned away. “You leave that man alone, anyhow,” he said, nodding his
head as he spoke.
But the captain meant to quarrel now. He raised his voice. “If he comes this end of the
ship again I’ll cut his insides out, I tell you. Cut out his blasted insides! Who are you, to tell me
what I’m to do? I tell you I’m captain of this ship, — captain and owner. I’m the law here, I tell
you, — the law and the prophets. I bargained to take a man and his attendant to and from
Arica, and bring back some animals. I never bargained to carry a mad devil and a silly
Sawbones, a —”
Well, never mind what he called Montgomery. I saw the latter take a step forward, and
interposed. “He’s drunk,” said I. The captain began some abuse even fouler than the last.
“Shut up!” I said, turning on him sharply, for I had seen danger in Montgomery’s white face.
With that I brought the downpour on myself.
However, I was glad to avert what was uncommonly near a scuffle, even at the price of
the captain’s drunken ill-will. I do not think I have ever heard quite so much vile language
come in a continuous stream from any man’s lips before, though I have frequented eccentric
company enough. I found some of it hard to endure, though I am a mild-tempered man; but,
certainly, when I told the captain to “shut up” I had forgotten that I was merely a bit of human
flotsam, cut off from my resources and with my fare unpaid; a mere casual dependant on the
bounty, or speculative enterprise, of the ship. He reminded me of it with considerable vigour;
but at any rate I prevented a fight.
Chapter 4 — At the Schooner’s Rail

That night land was sighted after sundown, and the schooner hove to. Montgomery
intimated that was his destination. It was too far to see any details; it seemed to me then
simply a low-lying patch of dim blue in the uncertain blue-grey sea. An almost vertical streak
of smoke went up from it into the sky. The captain was not on deck when it was sighted. After
he had vented his wrath on me he had staggered below, and I understand he went to sleep on
the floor of his own cabin. The mate practically assumed the command. He was the gaunt,
taciturn individual we had seen at the wheel. Apparently he was in an evil temper with
Montgomery. He took not the slightest notice of either of us. We dined with him in a sulky
silence, after a few ineffectual efforts on my part to talk. It struck me too that the men
regarded my companion and his animals in a singularly unfriendly manner. I found
Montgomery very reticent about his purpose with these creatures, and about his destination;
and though I was sensible of a growing curiosity as to both, I did not press him.
We remained talking on the quarter deck until the sky was thick with stars. Except for an
occasional sound in the yellow-lit forecastle and a movement of the animals now and then, the
night was very still. The puma lay crouched together, watching us with shining eyes, a black
heap in the corner of its cage. Montgomery produced some cigars. He talked to me of London
in a tone of half-painful reminiscence, asking all kinds of questions about changes that had
taken place. He spoke like a man who had loved his life there, and had been suddenly and
irrevocably cut off from it. I gossiped as well as I could of this and that. All the time the
strangeness of him was shaping itself in my mind; and as I talked I peered at his odd, pallid
face in the dim light of the binnacle lantern behind me. Then I looked out at the darkling sea,
where in the dimness his little island was hidden.
This man, it seemed to me, had come out of Immensity merely to save my life.
Tomorrow he would drop over the side, and vanish again out of my existence. Even had it been
under commonplace circumstances, it would have made me a trifle thoughtful; but in the first
place was the singularity of an educated man living on this unknown little island, and coupled
with that the extraordinary nature of his luggage. I found myself repeating the captain’s
question, What did he want with the beasts? Why, too, had he pretended they were not his
when I had remarked about them at first? Then, again, in his personal attendant there was a
bizarre quality which had impressed me profoundly. These circumstances threw a haze of
mystery round the man. They laid hold of my imagination, and hampered my tongue.
Towards midnight our talk of London died away, and we stood side by side leaning over
the bulwarks and staring dreamily over the silent, starlit sea, each pursuing his own thoughts.
It was the atmosphere for sentiment, and I began upon my gratitude.
“If I may say it,” said I, after a time, “you have saved my life.”
“Chance,” he answered. “Just chance.”
“I prefer to make my thanks to the accessible agent.”
“Thank no one. You had the need, and I had the knowledge; and I injected and fed you
much as I might have collected a specimen. I was bored and wanted something to do. If I’d
been jaded that day, or hadn’t liked your face, well — it’s a curious question where you would
have been now!”
This damped my mood a little. “At any rate,” I began.
“It’s chance, I tell you,” he interrupted, “as everything is in a man’s life. Only the asses
won’t see it! Why am I here now, an outcast from civilisation, instead of being a happy man
enjoying all the pleasures of London? Simply because eleven years ago — I lost my head for
ten minutes on a foggy night.”He stopped. “Yes?” said I.
“That’s all.”
We relapsed into silence. Presently he laughed. “There’s something in this starlight that
loosens one’s tongue. I’m an ass, and yet somehow I would like to tell you.”
“Whatever you tell me, you may rely upon my keeping to myself — if that’s it.”
He was on the point of beginning, and then shook his head, doubtfully.
“Don’t,” said I. “It is all the same to me. After all, it is better to keep your secret. There’s
nothing gained but a little relief if I respect your confidence. If I don’t — well?”
He grunted undecidedly. I felt I had him at a disadvantage, had caught him in the mood
of indiscretion; and to tell the truth I was not curious to learn what might have driven a young
medical student out of London. I have an imagination. I shrugged my shoulders and turned
away. Over the taffrail leant a silent black figure, watching the stars. It was Montgomery’s
strange attendant. It looked over its shoulder quickly with my movement, then looked away
It may seem a little thing to you, perhaps, but it came like a sudden blow to me. The only
light near us was a lantern at the wheel. The creature’s face was turned for one brief instant
out of the dimness of the stern towards this illumination, and I saw that the eyes that glanced
at me shone with a pale-green light. I did not know then that a reddish luminosity, at least, is
not uncommon in human eyes. The thing came to me as stark inhumanity. That black figure
with its eyes of fire struck down through all my adult thoughts and feelings, and for a moment
the forgotten horrors of childhood came back to my mind. Then the effect passed as it had
come. An uncouth black figure of a man, a figure of no particular import, hung over the taffrail
against the starlight, and I found Montgomery was speaking to me.
“I’m thinking of turning in, then,” said he, “if you’ve had enough of this.”
I answered him incongruously. We went below, and he wished me good-night at the door
of my cabin.
That night I had some very unpleasant dreams. The waning moon rose late. Its light
struck a ghostly white beam across my cabin, and made an ominous shape on the planking by
my bunk. Then the staghounds woke, and began howling and baying; so that I dreamt fitfully,
and scarcely slept until the approach of dawn.
Chapter 5 — The Man Who Had Nowhere to Go

In the early morning (it was the second morning after my recovery, and I believe the
fourth after I was picked up), I awoke through an avenue of tumultuous dreams, — dreams of
guns and howling mobs, — and became sensible of a hoarse shouting above me. I rubbed my
eyes and lay listening to the noise, doubtful for a little while of my whereabouts. Then came a
sudden pattering of bare feet, the sound of heavy objects being thrown about, a violent
creaking and the rattling of chains. I heard the swish of the water as the ship was suddenly
brought round, and a foamy yellow-green wave flew across the little round window and left it
streaming. I jumped into my clothes and went on deck.
As I came up the ladder I saw against the flushed sky — for the sun was just rising —
the broad back and red hair of the captain, and over his shoulder the puma spinning from a
tackle rigged on to the mizzen spanker-boom.
The poor brute seemed horribly scared, and crouched in the bottom of its little cage.
“Overboard with ‘em!” bawled the captain. “Overboard with ‘em! We’ll have a clean ship
soon of the whole bilin’ of ‘em.”
He stood in my way, so that I had perforce to tap his shoulder to come on deck. He
came round with a start, and staggered back a few paces to stare at me. It needed no expert
eye to tell that the man was still drunk.
“Hullo!” said he, stupidly; and then with a light coming into his eyes, “Why, it’s Mister —
“Prendick,” said I.
“Pendick be damned!” said he. “Shut-up, — that’s your name. Mister Shut-up.”
It was no good answering the brute; but I certainly did not expect his next move. He held
out his hand to the gangway by which Montgomery stood talking to a massive grey-haired
man in dirty-blue flannels, who had apparently just come aboard.
“That way, Mister Blasted Shut-up! that way!” roared the captain.
Montgomery and his companion turned as he spoke.
“What do you mean?” I said.
“That way, Mister Blasted Shut-up, — that’s what I mean! Overboard, Mister Shut-up, —
and sharp! We’re cleaning the ship out, — cleaning the whole blessed ship out; and overboard
you go!”
I stared at him dumfounded. Then it occurred to me that it was exactly the thing I
wanted. The lost prospect of a journey as sole passenger with this quarrelsome sot was not
one to mourn over. I turned towards Montgomery.
“Can’t have you,” said Montgomery’s companion, concisely.
“You can’t have me!” said I, aghast. He had the squarest and most resolute face I ever
set eyes upon.
“Look here,” I began, turning to the captain.
“Overboard!” said the captain. “This ship aint for beasts and cannibals and worse than
beasts, any more. Overboard you go, Mister Shut-up. If they can’t have you, you goes
overboard. But, anyhow, you go — with your friends. I’ve done with this blessed island for
evermore, amen! I’ve had enough of it.”
“But, Montgomery,” I appealed.
He distorted his lower lip, and nodded his head hopelessly at the grey-haired man beside
him, to indicate his powerlessness to help me.
“I’ll see to you, presently,” said the captain.
Then began a curious three-cornered altercation. Alternately I appealed to one andanother of the three men, — first to the grey-haired man to let me land, and then to the
drunken captain to keep me aboard. I even bawled entreaties to the sailors. Montgomery said
never a word, only shook his head. “You’re going overboard, I tell you,” was the captain’s
refrain. “Law be damned! I’m king here.” At last I must confess my voice suddenly broke in
the middle of a vigorous threat. I felt a gust of hysterical petulance, and went aft and stared
dismally at nothing.
Meanwhile the sailors progressed rapidly with the task of unshipping the packages and
caged animals. A large launch, with two standing lugs, lay under the lea of the schooner; and
into this the strange assortment of goods were swung. I did not then see the hands from the
island that were receiving the packages, for the hull of the launch was hidden from me by the
side of the schooner. Neither Montgomery nor his companion took the slightest notice of me,
but busied themselves in assisting and directing the four or five sailors who were unloading
the goods. The captain went forward interfering rather than assisting. I was alternately
despairful and desperate. Once or twice as I stood waiting there for things to accomplish
themselves, I could not resist an impulse to laugh at my miserable quandary. I felt all the
wretcheder for the lack of a breakfast. Hunger and a lack of blood-corpuscles take all the
manhood from a man. I perceived pretty clearly that I had not the stamina either to resist
what the captain chose to do to expel me, or to force myself upon Montgomery and his
companion. So I waited passively upon fate; and the work of transferring Montgomery’s
possessions to the launch went on as if I did not exist.
Presently that work was finished, and then came a struggle. I was hauled, resisting
weakly enough, to the gangway. Even then I noticed the oddness of the brown faces of the
men who were with Montgomery in the launch; but the launch was now fully laden, and was
shoved off hastily. A broadening gap of green water appeared under me, and I pushed back
with all my strength to avoid falling headlong. The hands in the launch shouted derisively, and
I heard Montgomery curse at them; and then the captain, the mate, and one of the seamen
helping him, ran me aft towards the stern.
The dingey of the “Lady Vain” had been towing behind; it was half full of water, had no
oars, and was quite unvictualled. I refused to go aboard her, and flung myself full length on
the deck. In the end, they swung me into her by a rope (for they had no stern ladder), and
then they cut me adrift. I drifted slowly from the schooner. In a kind of stupor I watched all
hands take to the rigging, and slowly but surely she came round to the wind; the sails
fluttered, and then bellied out as the wind came into them. I stared at her weather-beaten side
heeling steeply towards me; and then she passed out of my range of view.
I did not turn my head to follow her. At first I could scarcely believe what had happened. I
crouched in the bottom of the dingey, stunned, and staring blankly at the vacant, oily sea.
Then I realized that I was in that little hell of mine again, now half swamped; and looking back
over the gunwale, I saw the schooner standing away from me, with the red-haired captain
mocking at me over the taffrail, and turning towards the island saw the launch growing smaller
as she approached the beach.
Abruptly the cruelty of this desertion became clear to me. I had no means of reaching
the land unless I should chance to drift there. I was still weak, you must remember, from my
exposure in the boat; I was empty and very faint, or I should have had more heart. But as it
was I suddenly began to sob and weep, as I had never done since I was a little child. The
tears ran down my face. In a passion of despair I struck with my fists at the water in the
bottom of the boat, and kicked savagely at the gunwale. I prayed aloud for God to let me die.
Chapter 6 — The Evil-Looking Boatmen

But the islanders, seeing that I was really adrift, took pity on me. I drifted very slowly to
the eastward, approaching the island slantingly; and presently I saw, with hysterical relief, the
launch come round and return towards me. She was heavily laden, and I could make out as
she drew nearer Montgomery’s white-haired, broad-shouldered companion sitting cramped up
with the dogs and several packing-cases in the stern sheets. This individual stared fixedly at
me without moving or speaking. The black-faced cripple was glaring at me as fixedly in the
bows near the puma. There were three other men besides, — three strange brutish-looking
fellows, at whom the staghounds were snarling savagely. Montgomery, who was steering,
brought the boat by me, and rising, caught and fastened my painter to the tiller to tow me, for
there was no room aboard.
I had recovered from my hysterical phase by this time and answered his hail, as he
approached, bravely enough. I told him the dingey was nearly swamped, and he reached me
a piggin. I was jerked back as the rope tightened between the boats. For some time I was
busy baling.
It was not until I had got the water under (for the water in the dingey had been shipped;
the boat was perfectly sound) that I had leisure to look at the people in the launch again.
The white-haired man I found was still regarding me steadfastly, but with an expression,
as I now fancied, of some perplexity. When my eyes met his, he looked down at the
staghound that sat between his knees. He was a powerfully-built man, as I have said, with a
fine forehead and rather heavy features; but his eyes had that odd drooping of the skin above
the lids which often comes with advancing years, and the fall of his heavy mouth at the
corners gave him an expression of pugnacious resolution. He talked to Montgomery in a tone
too low for me to hear.
From him my eyes travelled to his three men; and a strange crew they were. I saw only
their faces, yet there was something in their faces — I knew not what — that gave me a
queer spasm of disgust. I looked steadily at them, and the impression did not pass, though I
failed to see what had occasioned it. They seemed to me then to be brown men; but their
limbs were oddly swathed in some thin, dirty, white stuff down even to the fingers and feet: I
have never seen men so wrapped up before, and women so only in the East. They wore
turbans too, and thereunder peered out their elfin faces at me, — faces with protruding
lowerjaws and bright eyes. They had lank black hair, almost like horsehair, and seemed as they sat
to exceed in stature any race of men I have seen. The white-haired man, who I knew was a
good six feet in height, sat a head below any one of the three. I found afterwards that really
none were taller than myself; but their bodies were abnormally long, and the thigh-part of the
leg short and curiously twisted. At any rate, they were an amazingly ugly gang, and over the
heads of them under the forward lug peered the black face of the man whose eyes were
luminous in the dark. As I stared at them, they met my gaze; and then first one and then
another turned away from my direct stare, and looked at me in an odd, furtive manner. It
occurred to me that I was perhaps annoying them, and I turned my attention to the island we
were approaching.
It was low, and covered with thick vegetation, — chiefly a kind of palm, that was new to
me. From one point a thin white thread of vapour rose slantingly to an immense height, and
then frayed out like a down feather. We were now within the embrace of a broad bay flanked
on either hand by a low promontory. The beach was of dull-grey sand, and sloped steeply up
to a ridge, perhaps sixty or seventy feet above the sea-level, and irregularly set with trees and
undergrowth. Half way up was a square enclosure of some greyish stone, which I foundsubsequently was built partly of coral and partly of pumiceous lava. Two thatched roofs
peeped from within this enclosure. A man stood awaiting us at the water’s edge. I fancied
while we were still far off that I saw some other and very grotesque-looking creatures scuttle
into the bushes upon the slope; but I saw nothing of these as we drew nearer. This man was
of a moderate size, and with a black negroid face. He had a large, almost lipless, mouth,
extraordinary lank arms, long thin feet, and bow-legs, and stood with his heavy face thrust
forward staring at us. He was dressed like Montgomery and his white-haired companion, in
jacket and trousers of blue serge. As we came still nearer, this individual began to run to and
fro on the beach, making the most grotesque movements.
At a word of command from Montgomery, the four men in the launch sprang up, and
with singularly awkward gestures struck the lugs. Montgomery steered us round and into a
narrow little dock excavated in the beach. Then the man on the beach hastened towards us.
This dock, as I call it, was really a mere ditch just long enough at this phase of the tide to take
the longboat. I heard the bows ground in the sand, staved the dingey off the rudder of the big
boat with my piggin, and freeing the painter, landed. The three muffled men, with the
clumsiest movements, scrambled out upon the sand, and forthwith set to landing the cargo,
assisted by the man on the beach. I was struck especially by the curious movements of the
legs of the three swathed and bandaged boatmen, — not stiff they were, but distorted in
some odd way, almost as if they were jointed in the wrong place. The dogs were still snarling,
and strained at their chains after these men, as the white-haired man landed with them. The
three big fellows spoke to one another in odd guttural tones, and the man who had waited for
us on the beach began chattering to them excitedly — a foreign language, as I fancied — as
they laid hands on some bales piled near the stern. Somewhere I had heard such a voice
before, and I could not think where. The white-haired man stood, holding in a tumult of six
dogs, and bawling orders over their din. Montgomery, having unshipped the rudder, landed
likewise, and all set to work at unloading. I was too faint, what with my long fast and the sun
beating down on my bare head, to offer any assistance.
Presently the white-haired man seemed to recollect my presence, and came up to me.
“You look,” said he, “as though you had scarcely breakfasted.” His little eyes were a
brilliant black under his heavy brows. “I must apologise for that. Now you are our guest, we
must make you comfortable, — though you are uninvited, you know.” He looked keenly into
my face. “Montgomery says you are an educated man, Mr. Prendick; says you know
something of science. May I ask what that signifies?”
I told him I had spent some years at the Royal College of Science, and had done some
researches in biology under Huxley. He raised his eyebrows slightly at that.
“That alters the case a little, Mr. Prendick,” he said, with a trifle more respect in his
manner. “As it happens, we are biologists here. This is a biological station — of a sort.” His
eye rested on the men in white who were busily hauling the puma, on rollers, towards the
walled yard. “I and Montgomery, at least,” he added. Then, “When you will be able to get
away, I can’t say. We’re off the track to anywhere. We see a ship once in a twelve-month or
He left me abruptly, and went up the beach past this group, and I think entered the
enclosure. The other two men were with Montgomery, erecting a pile of smaller packages on
a low-wheeled truck. The llama was still on the launch with the rabbit hutches; the staghounds
were still lashed to the thwarts. The pile of things completed, all three men laid hold of the
truck and began shoving the ton-weight or so upon it after the puma. Presently Montgomery
left them, and coming back to me held out his hand.
“I’m glad,” said he, “for my own part. That captain was a silly ass. He’d have made things
lively for you.”
“lt was you,” said I, “that saved me again”.
“That depends. You’ll find this island an infernally rum place, I promise you. I’d watch mygoings carefully, if I were you. He —” He hesitated, and seemed to alter his mind about what
was on his lips. “I wish you’d help me with these rabbits,” he said.
His procedure with the rabbits was singular. I waded in with him, and helped him lug one
of the hutches ashore. No sooner was that done than he opened the door of it, and tilting the
thing on one end turned its living contents out on the ground. They fell in a struggling heap
one on the top of the other. He clapped his hands, and forthwith they went off with that
hopping run of theirs, fifteen or twenty of them I should think, up the beach.
“Increase and multiply, my friends,” said Montgomery. “Replenish the island. Hitherto
we’ve had a certain lack of meat here.”
As I watched them disappearing, the white-haired man returned with a brandy-flask and
some biscuits. “Something to go on with, Prendick,” said he, in a far more familiar tone than
before. I made no ado, but set to work on the biscuits at once, while the white-haired man
helped Montgomery to release about a score more of the rabbits. Three big hutches,
however, went up to the house with the puma. The brandy I did not touch, for I have been an
abstainer from my birth.
Chapter 7 — “The Locked Door”

The reader will perhaps understand that at first everything was so strange about me, and
my position was the outcome of such unexpected adventures, that I had no discernment of
the relative strangeness of this or that thing. I followed the llama up the beach, and was
overtaken by Montgomery, who asked me not to enter the stone enclosure. I noticed then that
the puma in its cage and the pile of packages had been placed outside the entrance to this
I turned and saw that the launch had now been unloaded, run out again, and was being
beached, and the white-haired man was walking towards us. He addressed Montgomery.
“And now comes the problem of this uninvited guest. What are we to do with him?”
“He knows something of science,” said Montgomery.
“I’m itching to get to work again — with this new stuff,” said the white-haired man,
noddding towards the enclosure. His eyes grew brighter.
“I daresay you are,” said Montgomery, in anything but a cordial tone.
“We can’t send him over there, and we can’t spare the time to build him a new shanty;
and we certainly can’t take him into our confidence just yet.”
“I’m in your hands,” said I. I had no idea of what he meant by “over there.”
“I’ve been thinking of the same things,” Montgomery answered. “There’s my room with
the outer door —”
“That’s it,” said the elder man, promptly, looking at Montgomery; and all three of us went
towards the enclosure. “I’m sorry to make a mystery, Mr. Prendick; but you’ll remember
you’re uninvited. Our little establishment here contains a secret or so, is a kind of Blue-Beard’s
chamber, in fact. Nothing very dreadful, really, to a sane man; but just now, as we don’t know
you —”
“Decidedly,” said I, “I should be a fool to take offence at any want of confidence.”
He twisted his heavy mouth into a faint smile — he was one of those saturnine people
who smile with the corners of the mouth down, — and bowed his acknowledgment of my
complaisance. The main entrance to the enclosure we passed; it was a heavy wooden gate,
framed in iron and locked, with the cargo of the launch piled outside it, and at the corner we
came to a small doorway I had not previously observed. The white-haired man produced a
bundle of keys from the pocket of his greasy blue jacket, opened this door, and entered. His
keys, and the elaborate locking-up of the place even while it was still under his eye, struck me
as peculiar. I followed him, and found myself in a small apartment, plainly but not
uncomfortably furnished and with its inner door, which was slightly ajar, opening into a paved
courtyard. This inner door Montgomery at once closed. A hammock was slung across the
darker corner of the room, and a small unglazed window defended by an iron bar looked out
towards the sea.
This the white-haired man told me was to be my apartment; and the inner door, which
“for fear of accidents,” he said, he would lock on the other side, was my limit inward. He called
my attention to a convenient deck-chair before the window, and to an array of old books,
chiefly, I found, surgical works and editions of the Latin and Greek classics (languages I
cannot read with any comfort), on a shelf near the hammock. He left the room by the outer
door, as if to avoid opening the inner one again.
“We usually have our meals in here,” said Montgomery, and then, as if in doubt, went out
after the other. “Moreau!” I heard him call, and for the moment I do not think I noticed. Then
as I handled the books on the shelf it came up in consciousness: Where had I heard the name
of Moreau before? I sat down before the window, took out the biscuits that still remained tome, and ate them with an excellent appetite. Moreau!
Through the window I saw one of those unaccountable men in white, lugging a
packingcase along the beach. Presently the window-frame hid him. Then I heard a key inserted and
turned in the lock behind me. After a little while I heard through the locked door the noise of
the staghounds, that had now been brought up from the beach. They were not barking, but
sniffing and growling in a curious fashion. I could hear the rapid patter of their feet, and
Montgomery’s voice soothing them.
I was very much impressed by the elaborate secrecy of these two men regarding the
contents of the place, and for some time I was thinking of that and of the unaccountable
familiarity of the name of Moreau; but so odd is the human memory that I could not then recall
that well-known name in its proper connection. From that my thoughts went to the indefinable
queerness of the deformed man on the beach. I never saw such a gait, such odd motions as
he pulled at the box. I recalled that none of these men had spoken to me, though most of
them I had found looking at me at one time or another in a peculiarly furtive manner, quite
unlike the frank stare of your unsophisticated savage. Indeed, they had all seemed
remarkably taciturn, and when they did speak, endowed with very uncanny voices. What was
wrong with them? Then I recalled the eyes of Montgomery’s ungainly attendant.
Just as I was thinking of him he came in. He was now dressed in white, and carried a
little tray with some coffee and boiled vegetables thereon. I could hardly repress a shuddering
recoil as he came, bending amiably, and placed the tray before me on the table. Then
astonishment paralysed me. Under his stringy black locks I saw his ear; it jumped upon me
suddenly close to my face. The man had pointed ears, covered with a fine brown fur!
“Your breakfast, sair,” he said.
I stared at his face without attempting to answer him. He turned and went towards the
door, regarding me oddly over his shoulder. I followed him out with my eyes; and as I did so,
by some odd trick of unconscious cerebration, there came surging into my head the phrase,
“The Moreau Hollows” — was it? “The Moreau —” Ah! It sent my memory back ten years.
“The Moreau Horrors!” The phrase drifted loose in my mind for a moment, and then I saw it in
red lettering on a little buff-coloured pamphlet, to read which made one shiver and creep.
Then I remembered distinctly all about it. That long-forgotten pamphlet came back with
startling vividness to my mind. I had been a mere lad then, and Moreau was, I suppose, about
fifty, — a prominent and masterful physiologist, well-known in scientific circles for his
extraordinary imagination and his brutal directness in discussion.
Was this the same Moreau? He had published some very astonishing facts in connection
with the transfusion of blood, and in addition was known to be doing valuable work on morbid
growths. Then suddenly his career was closed. He had to leave England. A journalist obtained
access to his laboratory in the capacity of laboratory-assistant, with the deliberate intention of
making sensational exposures; and by the help of a shocking accident (if it was an accident),
his gruesome pamphlet became notorious. On the day of its publication a wretched dog,
flayed and otherwise mutilated, escaped from Moreau’s house. It was in the silly season, and
a prominent editor, a cousin of the temporary laboratory-assistant, appealed to the
conscience of the nation. It was not the first time that conscience has turned against the
methods of research. The doctor was simply howled out of the country. It may be that he
deserved to be; but I still think that the tepid support of his fellow-investigators and his
desertion by the great body of scientific workers was a shameful thing. Yet some of his
experiments, by the journalist’s account, were wantonly cruel. He might perhaps have
purchased his social peace by abandoning his investigations; but he apparently preferred the
latter, as most men would who have once fallen under the overmastering spell of research. He
was unmarried, and had indeed nothing but his own interest to consider.
I felt convinced that this must be the same man. Everything pointed to it. It dawned upon
me to what end the puma and the other animals — which had now been brought with otherluggage into the enclosure behind the house — were destined; and a curious faint odour, the
halitus of something familiar, an odour that had been in the background of my consciousness
hitherto, suddenly came forward into the forefront of my thoughts. It was the antiseptic odour
of the dissecting-room. I heard the puma growling through the wall, and one of the dogs
yelped as though it had been struck.
Yet surely, and especially to another scientific man, there was nothing so horrible in
vivisection as to account for this secrecy; and by some odd leap in my thoughts the pointed
ears and luminous eyes of Montgomery’s attendant came back again before me with the
sharpest definition. I stared before me out at the green sea, frothing under a freshening
breeze, and let these and other strange memories of the last few days chase one another
through my mind.
What could it all mean? A locked enclosure on a lonely island, a notorious vivisector, and
these crippled and distorted men?
Chapter 8 — The Crying of the Puma

Montgomery interrupted my tangle of mystification and suspicion about one o’clock, and
his grotesque attendant followed him with a tray bearing bread, some herbs and other
eatables, a flask of whiskey, a jug of water, and three glasses and knives. I glanced askance
at this strange creature, and found him watching me with his queer, restless eyes.
Montgomery said he would lunch with me, but that Moreau was too preoccupied with some
work to come.
“Moreau!” said I. “I know that name.”
“The devil you do!” said he. “What an ass I was to mention it to you! I might have
thought. Anyhow, it will give you an inkling of our — mysteries. Whiskey?”
“No, thanks; I’m an abstainer.”
“I wish I’d been. But it’s no use locking the door after the steed is stolen. It was that
infernal stuff which led to my coming here, — that, and a foggy night. I thought myself in luck
at the time, when Moreau offered to get me off. It’s queer —”
“Montgomery,” said I, suddenly, as the outer door closed, “why has your man pointed
“Damn!” he said, over his first mouthful of food. He stared at me for a moment, and then
repeated, “Pointed ears?”
“Little points to them,” said I, as calmly as possible, with a catch in my breath; “and a fine
black fur at the edges?”
He helped himself to whiskey and water with great deliberation. “I was under the
impression — that his hair covered his ears.”
“I saw them as he stooped by me to put that coffee you sent to me on the table. And his
eyes shine in the dark.”
By this time Montgomery had recovered from the surprise of my question. “I always
thought,” he said deliberately, with a certain accentuation of his flavouring of lisp, “that there
was something the matter with his ears, from the way he covered them. What were they like?”
I was persuaded from his manner that this ignorance was a pretence. Still, I could hardly
tell the man that I thought him a liar. “Pointed,” I said; “rather small and furry, — distinctly
furry. But the whole man is one of the strangest beings I ever set eyes on.”
A sharp, hoarse cry of animal pain came from the enclosure behind us. Its depth and
volume testified to the puma. I saw Montgomery wince.
“Yes?” he said.
“Where did you pick up the creature?”
“San Francisco. He’s an ugly brute, I admit. Half-witted, you know. Can’t remember
where he came from. But I’m used to him, you know. We both are. How does he strike you?”
“He’s unnatural,” I said. “There’s something about him — don’t think me fanciful, but it
gives me a nasty little sensation, a tightening of my muscles, when he comes near me. It’s a
touch — of the diabolical, in fact.”
Montgomery had stopped eating while I told him this. “Rum!” he said. “I can’t see it.” He
resumed his meal. “I had no idea of it,” he said, and masticated. “The crew of the schooner
must have felt it the same. Made a dead set at the poor devil. You saw the captain?”
Suddenly the puma howled again, this time more painfully. Montgomery swore under his
breath. I had half a mind to attack him about the men on the beach. Then the poor brute
within gave vent to a series of short, sharp cries.
“Your men on the beach,” said I; “what race are they?”
“Excellent fellows, aren’t they?” said he, absentmindedly, knitting his brows as the animalyelled out sharply.
I said no more. There was another outcry worse than the former. He looked at me with
his dull grey eyes, and then took some more whiskey. He tried to draw me into a discussion
about alcohol, professing to have saved my life with it. He seemed anxious to lay stress on
the fact that I owed my life to him. I answered him distractedly.
Presently our meal came to an end; the misshapen monster with the pointed ears
cleared the remains away, and Montgomery left me alone in the room again. All the time he
had been in a state of ill-concealed irritation at the noise of the vivisected puma. He had
spoken of his odd want of nerve, and left me to the obvious application.
I found myself that the cries were singularly irritating, and they grew in depth and
intensity as the afternoon wore on. They were painful at first, but their constant resurgence at
last altogether upset my balance. I flung aside a crib of Horace I had been reading, and began
to clench my fists, to bite my lips, and to pace the room. Presently I got to stopping my ears
with my fingers.
The emotional appeal of those yells grew upon me steadily, grew at last to such an
exquisite expression of suffering that I could stand it in that confined room no longer. I
stepped out of the door into the slumberous heat of the late afternoon, and walking past the
main entrance — locked again, I noticed — turned the corner of the wall
The crying sounded even louder out of doors. It was as if all the pain in the world had
found a voice. Yet had I known such pain was in the next room, and had it been dumb, I
believe — I have thought since — I could have stood it well enough. It is when suffering finds
a voice and sets our nerves quivering that this pity comes troubling us. But in spite of the
brilliant sunlight and the green fans of the trees waving in the soothing sea-breeze, the world
was a confusion, blurred with drifting black and red phantasms, until I was out of earshot of
the house in the chequered wall.
Chapter 9 — The Thing in the Forest

I strode through the undergrowth that clothed the ridge behind the house, scarcely
heeding whither I went; passed on through the shadow of a thick cluster of straight-stemmed
trees beyond it, and so presently found myself some way on the other side of the ridge, and
descending towards a streamlet that ran through a narrow valley. I paused and listened. The
distance I had come, or the intervening masses of thicket, deadened any sound that might be
coming from the enclosure. The air was still. Then with a rustle a rabbit emerged, and went
scampering up the slope before me. I hesitated, and sat down in the edge of the shade.
The place was a pleasant one. The rivulet was hidden by the luxuriant vegetation of the
banks save at one point, where I caught a triangular patch of its glittering water. On the
farther side I saw through a bluish haze a tangle of trees and creepers, and above these
again the luminous blue of the sky. Here and there a splash of white or crimson marked the
blooming of some trailing epiphyte. I let my eyes wander over this scene for a while, and then
began to turn over in my mind again the strange peculiarities of Montgomery’s man. But it was
too hot to think elaborately, and presently I fell into a tranquil state midway between dozing
and waking.
From this I was aroused, after I know not how long, by a rustling amidst the greenery on
the other side of the stream. For a moment I could see nothing but the waving summits of the
ferns and reeds. Then suddenly upon the bank of the stream appeared Something — at first I
could not distinguish what it was. It bowed its round head to the water, and began to drink.
Then I saw it was a man, going on all-fours like a beast. He was clothed in bluish cloth, and
was of a copper-coloured hue, with black hair. It seemed that grotesque ugliness was an
invariable character of these islanders. I could hear the suck of the water at his lips as he
I leant forward to see him better, and a piece of lava, detached by my hand, went
pattering down the slope. He looked up guiltily, and his eyes met mine. Forthwith he
scrambled to his feet, and stood wiping his clumsy hand across his mouth and regarding me.
His legs were scarcely half the length of his body. So, staring one another out of countenance,
we remained for perhaps the space of a minute. Then, stopping to look back once or twice, he
slunk off among the bushes to the right of me, and I heard the swish of the fronds grow faint
in the distance and die away. Long after he had disappeared, I remained sitting up staring in
the direction of his retreat. My drowsy tranquillity had gone.
I was startled by a noise behind me, and turning suddenly saw the flapping white tail of a
rabbit vanishing up the slope. I jumped to my feet. The apparition of this grotesque,
halfbestial creature had suddenly populated the stillness of the afternoon for me. I looked around
me rather nervously, and regretted that I was unarmed. Then I thought that the man I had just
seen had been clothed in bluish cloth, had not been naked as a savage would have been; and
I tried to persuade myself from that fact that he was after all probably a peaceful character,
that the dull ferocity of his countenance belied him.
Yet I was greatly disturbed at the apparition. I walked to the left along the slope, turning
my head about and peering this way and that among the straight stems of the trees. Why
should a man go on all-fours and drink with his lips? Presently I heard an animal wailing again,
and taking it to be the puma, I turned about and walked in a direction diametrically opposite to
the sound. This led me down to the stream, across which I stepped and pushed my way up
through the undergrowth beyond.
I was startled by a great patch of vivid scarlet on the ground, and going up to it found it
to be a peculiar fungus, branched and corrugated like a foliaceous lichen, but deliquescing intoslime at the touch; and then in the shadow of some luxuriant ferns I came upon an unpleasant
thing, — the dead body of a rabbit covered with shining flies, but still warm and with the head
torn off. I stopped aghast at the sight of the scattered blood. Here at least was one visitor to
the island disposed of! There were no traces of other violence about it. It looked as though it
had been suddenly snatched up and killed; and as I stared at the little furry body came the
difficulty of how the thing had been done. The vague dread that had been in my mind since I
had seen the inhuman face of the man at the stream grew distincter as I stood there. I began
to realise the hardihood of my expedition among these unknown people. The thicket about me
became altered to my imagination. Every shadow became something more than a shadow, —
became an ambush; every rustle became a threat. Invisible things seemed watching me. I
resolved to go back to the enclosure on the beach. I suddenly turned away and thrust myself
violently, possibly even frantically, through the bushes, anxious to get a clear space about me
I stopped just in time to prevent myself emerging upon an open space. It was a kind of
glade in the forest, made by a fall; seedlings were already starting up to struggle for the
vacant space; and beyond, the dense growth of stems and twining vines and splashes of
fungus and flowers closed in again. Before me, squatting together upon the fungoid ruins of a
huge fallen tree and still unaware of my approach, were three grotesque human figures. One
was evidently a female; the other two were men. They were naked, save for swathings of
scarlet cloth about the middle; and their skins were of a dull pinkish-drab colour, such as I had
seen in no savages before. They had fat, heavy, chinless faces, retreating foreheads, and a
scant bristly hair upon their heads. I never saw such bestial-looking creatures.
They were talking, or at least one of the men was talking to the other two, and all three
had been too closely interested to heed the rustling of my approach. They swayed their heads
and shoulders from side to side. The speaker’s words came thick and sloppy, and though I
could hear them distinctly I could not distinguish what he said. He seemed to me to be reciting
some complicated gibberish. Presently his articulation became shriller, and spreading his
hands he rose to his feet. At that the others began to gibber in unison, also rising to their feet,
spreading their hands and swaying their bodies in rhythm with their chant. I noticed then the
abnormal shortness of their legs, and their lank, clumsy feet. All three began slowly to circle
round, raising and stamping their feet and waving their arms; a kind of tune crept into their
rhythmic recitation, and a refrain, — “Aloola,” or “Balloola,” it sounded like. Their eyes began
to sparkle, and their ugly faces to brighten, with an expression of strange pleasure. Saliva
dripped from their lipless mouths.
Suddenly, as I watched their grotesque and unaccountable gestures, I perceived clearly
for the first time what it was that had offended me, what had given me the two inconsistent
and conflicting impressions of utter strangeness and yet of the strangest familiarity. The three
creatures engaged in this mysterious rite were human in shape, and yet human beings with
the strangest air about them of some familiar animal. Each of these creatures, despite its
human form, its rag of clothing, and the rough humanity of its bodily form, had woven into it —
into its movements, into the expression of its countenance, into its whole presence — some
now irresistible suggestion of a hog, a swinish taint, the unmistakable mark of the beast.
I stood overcome by this amazing realisation and then the most horrible questionings
came rushing into my mind. They began leaping in the air, first one and then the other,
whooping and grunting. Then one slipped, and for a moment was on all-fours, — to recover,
indeed, forthwith. But that transitory gleam of the true animalism of these monsters was
I turned as noiselessly as possible, and becoming every now and then rigid with the fear
of being discovered, as a branch cracked or a leaf rustled, I pushed back into the bushes. It
was long before I grew bolder, and dared to move freely. My only idea for the moment was to
get away from these foul beings, and I scarcely noticed that I had emerged upon a faintpathway amidst the trees. Then suddenly traversing a little glade, I saw with an unpleasant
start two clumsy legs among the trees, walking with noiseless footsteps parallel with my
course, and perhaps thirty yards away from me. The head and upper part of the body were
hidden by a tangle of creeper. I stopped abruptly, hoping the creature did not see me. The
feet stopped as I did. So nervous was I that I controlled an impulse to headlong flight with the
utmost difficulty. Then looking hard, I distinguished through the interlacing network the head
and body of the brute I had seen drinking. He moved his head. There was an emerald flash in
his eyes as he glanced at me from the shadow of the trees, a half-luminous colour that
vanished as he turned his head again. He was motionless for a moment, and then with a
noiseless tread began running through the green confusion. In another moment he had
vanished behind some bushes. I could not see him, but I felt that he had stopped and was
watching me again.
What on earth was he, — man or beast? What did he want with me? I had no weapon,
not even a stick. Flight would be madness. At any rate the Thing, whatever it was, lacked the
courage to attack me. Setting my teeth hard, I walked straight towards him. I was anxious not
to show the fear that seemed chilling my backbone. I pushed through a tangle of tall
whiteflowered bushes, and saw him twenty paces beyond, looking over his shoulder at me and
hesitating. I advanced a step or two, looking steadfastly into his eyes.
“Who are you?” said I.
He tried to meet my gaze. “No!” he said suddenly, and turning went bounding away from
me through the undergrowth. Then he turned and stared at me again. His eyes shone brightly
out of the dusk under the trees.
My heart was in my mouth; but I felt my only chance was bluff, and walked steadily
towards him. He turned again, and vanished into the dusk. Once more I thought I caught the
glint of his eyes, and that was all.
For the first time I realised how the lateness of the hour might affect me. The sun had
set some minutes since, the swift dusk of the tropics was already fading out of the eastern
sky, and a pioneer moth fluttered silently by my head. Unless I would spend the night among
the unknown dangers of the mysterious forest, I must hasten back to the enclosure. The
thought of a return to that pain-haunted refuge was extremely disagreeable, but still more so
was the idea of being overtaken in the open by darkness and all that darkness might conceal.
I gave one more look into the blue shadows that had swallowed up this odd creature, and then
retraced my way down the slope towards the stream, going as I judged in the direction from
which I had come.
I walked eagerly, my mind confused with many things, and presently found myself in a
level place among scattered trees. The colourless clearness that comes after the sunset flush
was darkling; the blue sky above grew momentarily deeper, and the little stars one by one
pierced the attenuated light; the interspaces of the trees, the gaps in the further vegetation,
that had been hazy blue in the daylight, grew black and mysterious. I pushed on. The colour
vanished from the world. The tree-tops rose against the luminous blue sky in inky silhouette,
and all below that outline melted into one formless blackness. Presently the trees grew
thinner, and the shrubby undergrowth more abundant. Then there was a desolate space
covered with a white sand, and then another expanse of tangled bushes. I did not remember
crossing the sand-opening before. I began to be tormented by a faint rustling upon my right
hand. I thought at first it was fancy, for whenever I stopped there was silence, save for the
evening breeze in the tree-tops. Then when I turned to hurry on again there was an echo to
my footsteps.
I turned away from the thickets, keeping to the more open ground, and endeavouring by
sudden turns now and then to surprise something in the act of creeping upon me. I saw
nothing, and nevertheless my sense of another presence grew steadily. I increased my pace,
and after some time came to a slight ridge, crossed it, and turned sharply, regarding itsteadfastly from the further side. It came out black and clear-cut against the darkling sky; and
presently a shapeless lump heaved up momentarily against the sky-line and vanished again. I
felt assured now that my tawny-faced antagonist was stalking me once more; and coupled
with that was another unpleasant realisation, that I had lost my way.
For a time I hurried on hopelessly perplexed, and pursued by that stealthy approach.
Whatever it was, the Thing either lacked the courage to attack me, or it was waiting to take
me at some disadvantage. I kept studiously to the open. At times I would turn and listen; and
presently I had half persuaded myself that my pursuer had abandoned the chase, or was a
mere creation of my disordered imagination. Then I heard the sound of the sea. I quickened
my footsteps almost into a run, and immediately there was a stumble in my rear.
I turned suddenly, and stared at the uncertain trees behind me. One black shadow
seemed to leap into another. I listened, rigid, and heard nothing but the creep of the blood in
my ears. I thought that my nerves were unstrung, and that my imagination was tricking me,
and turned resolutely towards the sound of the sea again.
In a minute or so the trees grew thinner, and I emerged upon a bare, low headland
running out into the sombre water. The night was calm and clear, and the reflection of the
growing multitude of the stars shivered in the tranquil heaving of the sea. Some way out, the
wash upon an irregular band of reef shone with a pallid light of its own. Westward I saw the
zodiacal light mingling with the yellow brilliance of the evening star. The coast fell away from
me to the east, and westward it was hidden by the shoulder of the cape. Then I recalled the
fact that Moreau’s beach lay to the west.
A twig snapped behind me, and there was a rustle. I turned, and stood facing the dark
trees. I could see nothing — or else I could see too much. Every dark form in the dimness
had its ominous quality, its peculiar suggestion of alert watchfulness. So I stood for perhaps a
minute, and then, with an eye to the trees still, turned westward to cross the headland; and as
I moved, one among the lurking shadows moved to follow me.
My heart beat quickly. Presently the broad sweep of a bay to the westward became
visible, and I halted again. The noiseless shadow halted a dozen yards from me. A little point
of light shone on the further bend of the curve, and the grey sweep of the sandy beach lay
faint under the starlight. Perhaps two miles away was that little point of light. To get to the
beach I should have to go through the trees where the shadows lurked, and down a bushy
I could see the Thing rather more distinctly now. It was no animal, for it stood erect. At
that I opened my mouth to speak, and found a hoarse phlegm choked my voice. I tried again,
and shouted, “Who is there?” There was no answer. I advanced a step. The Thing did not
move, only gathered itself together. My foot struck a stone. That gave me an idea. Without
taking my eyes off the black form before me, I stooped and picked up this lump of rock; but at
my motion the Thing turned abruptly as a dog might have done, and slunk obliquely into the
further darkness. Then I recalled a schoolboy expedient against big dogs, and twisted the rock
into my handkerchief, and gave this a turn round my wrist. I heard a movement further off
among the shadows, as if the Thing was in retreat. Then suddenly my tense excitement gave
way; I broke into a profuse perspiration and fell a-trembling, with my adversary routed and this
weapon in my hand.
It was some time before I could summon resolution to go down through the trees and
bushes upon the flank of the headland to the beach. At last I did it at a run; and as I emerged
from the thicket upon the sand, I heard some other body come crashing after me. At that I
completely lost my head with fear, and began running along the sand. Forthwith there came
the swift patter of soft feet in pursuit. I gave a wild cry, and redoubled my pace. Some dim,
black things about three or four times the size of rabbits went running or hopping up from the
beach towards the bushes as I passed.
So long as I live, I shall remember the terror of that chase. I ran near the water’s edge,and heard every now and then the splash of the feet that gained upon me. Far away,
hopelessly far, was the yellow light. All the night about us was black and still. Splash, splash,
came the pursuing feet, nearer and nearer. I felt my breath going, for I was quite out of
training; it whooped as I drew it, and I felt a pain like a knife at my side. I perceived the Thing
would come up with me long before I reached the enclosure, and, desperate and sobbing for
my breath, I wheeled round upon it and struck at it as it came up to me, — struck with all my
strength. The stone came out of the sling of the handkerchief as I did so. As I turned, the
Thing, which had been running on all-fours, rose to its feet, and the missile fell fair on its left
temple. The skull rang loud, and the animal-man blundered into me, thrust me back with its
hands, and went staggering past me to fall headlong upon the sand with its face in the water;
and there it lay still.
I could not bring myself to approach that black heap. I left it there, with the water rippling
round it, under the still stars, and giving it a wide berth pursued my way towards the yellow
glow of the house; and presently, with a positive effect of relief, came the pitiful moaning of
the puma, the sound that had originally driven me out to explore this mysterious island. At
that, though I was faint and horribly fatigued, I gathered together all my strength, and began
running again towards the light. I thought I heard a voice calling me.
Chapter 10 — The Crying of the Man

As I drew near the house I saw that the light shone from the open door of my room; and
then I heard coming from out of the darkness at the side of that orange oblong of light, the
voice of Montgomery shouting, “Prendick!” I continued running. Presently I heard him again. I
replied by a feeble “Hullo!” and in another moment had staggered up to him.
“Where have you been?” said he, holding me at arm’s length, so that the light from the
door fell on my face. “We have both been so busy that we forgot you until about half an hour
ago.” He led me into the room and set me down in the deck chair. For awhile I was blinded by
the light. “We did not think you would start to explore this island of ours without telling us,” he
said; and then, “I was afraid — But — what — Hullo!”
My last remaining strength slipped from me, and my head fell forward on my chest. I
think he found a certain satisfaction in giving me brandy.
“For God’s sake,” said I, “fasten that door.”
“You’ve been meeting some of our curiosities, eh?” said he.
He locked the door and turned to me again. He asked me no questions, but gave me
some more brandy and water and pressed me to eat. I was in a state of collapse. He said
something vague about his forgetting to warn me, and asked me briefly when I left the house
and what I had seen.
I answered him as briefly, in fragmentary sentences. “Tell me what it all means,” said I,
in a state bordering on hysterics.
“It’s nothing so very dreadful,” said he. “But I think you have had about enough for one
day.” The puma suddenly gave a sharp yell of pain. At that he swore under his breath. “I’m
damned,” said he, “if this place is not as bad as Gower Street, with its cats.”
“Montgomery,” said I, “what was that thing that came after me? Was it a beast or was it
a man?”
“If you don’t sleep to-night,” he said, “you’ll be off your head to-morrow.”
I stood up in front of him. “What was that thing that came after me?” I asked.
He looked me squarely in the eyes, and twisted his mouth askew. His eyes, which had
seemed animated a minute before, went dull. “From your account,” said he, “I’m thinking it
was a bogle.”
I felt a gust of intense irritation, which passed as quickly as it came. I flung myself into
the chair again, and pressed my hands on my forehead. The puma began once more.
Montgomery came round behind me and put his hand on my shoulder. “Look here,
Prendick,” he said, “I had no business to let you drift out into this silly island of ours. But it’s
not so bad as you feel, man. Your nerves are worked to rags. Let me give you something that
will make you sleep. That — will keep on for hours yet. You must simply get to sleep, or I
won’t answer for it.”
I did not reply. I bowed forward, and covered my face with my hands. Presently he
returned with a small measure containing a dark liquid. This he gave me. I took it
unresistingly, and he helped me into the hammock.
When I awoke, it was broad day. For a little while I lay flat, staring at the roof above me.
The rafters, I observed, were made out of the timbers of a ship. Then I turned my head, and
saw a meal prepared for me on the table. I perceived that I was hungry, and prepared to
clamber out of the hammock, which, very politely anticipating my intention, twisted round and
deposited me upon all-fours on the floor.
I got up and sat down before the food. I had a heavy feeling in my head, and only the
vaguest memory at first of the things that had happened over night. The morning breeze blewvery pleasantly through the unglazed window, and that and the food contributed to the sense
of animal comfort which I experienced. Presently the door behind me — the door inward
towards the yard of the enclosure — opened. I turned and saw Montgomery’s face.
“All right,” said he. “I’m frightfully busy.” And he shut the door.
Afterwards I discovered that he forgot to re-lock it. Then I recalled the expression of his
face the previous night, and with that the memory of all I had experienced reconstructed itself
before me. Even as that fear came back to me came a cry from within; but this time it was not
the cry of a puma. I put down the mouthful that hesitated upon my lips, and listened. Silence,
save for the whisper of the morning breeze. I began to think my ears had deceived me.
After a long pause I resumed my meal, but with my ears still vigilant. Presently I heard
something else, very faint and low. I sat as if frozen in my attitude. Though it was faint and
low, it moved me more profoundly than all that I had hitherto heard of the abominations
behind the wall. There was no mistake this time in the quality of the dim, broken sounds; no
doubt at all of their source. For it was groaning, broken by sobs and gasps of anguish. It was
no brute this time; it was a human being in torment!
As I realised this I rose, and in three steps had crossed the room, seized the handle of
the door into the yard, and flung it open before me.
“Prendick, man! Stop!” cried Montgomery, intervening.
A startled deerhound yelped and snarled. There was blood, I saw, in the sink, — brown,
and some scarlet — and I smelt the peculiar smell of carbolic acid. Then through an open
doorway beyond, in the dim light of the shadow, I saw something bound painfully upon a
framework, scarred, red, and bandaged; and then blotting this out appeared the face of old
Moreau, white and terrible. In a moment he had gripped me by the shoulder with a hand that
was smeared red, had twisted me off my feet, and flung me headlong back into my own room.
He lifted me as though I was a little child. I fell at full length upon the floor, and the door
slammed and shut out the passionate intensity of his face. Then I heard the key turn in the
lock, and Montgomery’s voice in expostulation.
“Ruin the work of a lifetime,” I heard Moreau say.
“He does not understand,” said Montgomery. and other things that were inaudible.
“I can’t spare the time yet,” said Moreau.
The rest I did not hear. I picked myself up and stood trembling, my mind a chaos of the
most horrible misgivings. Could it be possible, I thought, that such a thing as the vivisection of
men was carried on here? The question shot like lightning across a tumultuous sky; and
suddenly the clouded horror of my mind condensed into a vivid realisation of my own danger.
Chapter 11 — The Hunting of the Man

It came before my mind with an unreasonable hope of escape that the outer door of my
room was still open to me. I was convinced now, absolutely assured, that Moreau had been
vivisecting a human being. All the time since I had heard his name, I had been trying to link in
my mind in some way the grotesque animalism of the islanders with his abominations; and
now I thought I saw it all. The memory of his work on the transfusion of blood recurred to me.
These creatures I had seen were the victims of some hideous experiment. These sickening
scoundrels had merely intended to keep me back, to fool me with their display of confidence,
and presently to fall upon me with a fate more horrible than death, — with torture; and after
torture the most hideous degradation it is possible to conceive, — to send me off a lost soul, a
beast, to the rest of their Comus rout.
I looked round for some weapon. Nothing. Then with an inspiration I turned over the deck
chair, put my foot on the side of it, and tore away the side rail. It happened that a nail came
away with the wood, and projecting, gave a touch of danger to an otherwise petty weapon. I
heard a step outside, and incontinently flung open the door and found Montgomery within a
yard of it. He meant to lock the outer door! I raised this nailed stick of mine and cut at his
face; but he sprang back. I hesitated a moment, then turned and fled, round the corner of the
house. “Prendick, man!” I heard his astonished cry, “don’t be a silly ass, man!”
Another minute, thought I, and he would have had me locked in, and as ready as a
hospital rabbit for my fate. He emerged behind the corner, for I heard him shout, “Prendick!”
Then he began to run after me, shouting things as he ran. This time running blindly, I went
northeastward in a direction at right angles to my previous expedition. Once, as I went running
headlong up the beach, I glanced over my shoulder and saw his attendant with him. I ran
furiously up the slope, over it, then turning eastward along a rocky valley fringed on either side
with jungle I ran for perhaps a mile altogether, my chest straining, my heart beating in my
ears; and then hearing nothing of Montgomery or his man, and feeling upon the verge of
exhaustion, I doubled sharply back towards the beach as I judged, and lay down in the shelter
of a canebrake. There I remained for a long time, too fearful to move, and indeed too fearful
even to plan a course of action. The wild scene about me lay sleeping silently under the sun,
and the only sound near me was the thin hum of some small gnats that had discovered me.
Presently I became aware of a drowsy breathing sound, the soughing of the sea upon the
After about an hour I heard Montgomery shouting my name, far away to the north. That
set me thinking of my plan of action. As I interpreted it then, this island was inhabited only by
these two vivisectors and their animalised victims. Some of these no doubt they could press
into their service against me if need arose. I knew both Moreau and Montgomery carried
revolvers; and, save for a feeble bar of deal spiked with a small nail, the merest mockery of a
mace, I was unarmed.
So I lay still there, until I began to think of food and drink; and at that thought the real
hopelessness of my position came home to me. I knew no way of getting anything to eat. I
was too ignorant of botany to discover any resort of root or fruit that might lie about me; I had
no means of trapping the few rabbits upon the island. It grew blanker the more I turned the
prospect over. At last in the desperation of my position, my mind turned to the animal men I
had encountered. I tried to find some hope in what I remembered of them. In turn I recalled
each one I had seen, and tried to draw some augury of assistance from my memory.
Then suddenly I heard a staghound bay, and at that realised a new danger. I took little
time to think, or they would have caught me then, but snatching up my nailed stick, rushedheadlong from my hiding-place towards the sound of the sea. I remember a growth of thorny
plants, with spines that stabbed like pen-knives. I emerged bleeding and with torn clothes
upon the lip of a long creek opening northward. I went straight into the water without a
minute’s hesitation, wading up the creek, and presently finding myself kneedeep in a little
stream. I scrambled out at last on the westward bank, and with my heart beating loudly in my
ears, crept into a tangle of ferns to await the issue. I heard the dog (there was only one) draw
nearer, and yelp when it came to the thorns. Then I heard no more, and presently began to
think I had escaped.
The minutes passed; the silence lengthened out, and at last after an hour of security my
courage began to return to me. By this time I was no longer very much terrified or very
miserable. I had, as it were, passed the limit of terror and despair. I felt now that my life was
practically lost, and that persuasion made me capable of daring anything. I had even a certain
wish to encounter Moreau face to face; and as I had waded into the water, I remembered that
if I were too hard pressed at least one path of escape from torment still lay open to me, —
they could not very well prevent my drowning myself. I had half a mind to drown myself then;
but an odd wish to see the whole adventure out, a queer, impersonal, spectacular interest in
myself, restrained me. I stretched my limbs, sore and painful from the pricks of the spiny
plants, and stared around me at the trees; and, so suddenly that it seemed to jump out of the
green tracery about it, my eyes lit upon a black face watching me. I saw that it was the simian
creature who had met the launch upon the beach. He was clinging to the oblique stem of a
palm-tree. I gripped my stick, and stood up facing him. He began chattering. “You, you, you,”
was all I could distinguish at first. Suddenly he dropped from the tree, and in another moment
was holding the fronds apart and staring curiously at me.
I did not feel the same repugnance towards this creature which I had experienced in my
encounters with the other Beast Men. “You, he said, “in the boat.” He was a man, then, — at
least as much of a man as Montgomery’s attendant, — for he could talk.
“Yes,” I said, “I came in the boat. From the ship.”
“Oh!” he said, and his bright, restless eyes travelled over me, to my hands, to the stick I
carried, to my feet, to the tattered places in my coat, and the cuts and scratches I had
received from the thorns. He seemed puzzled at something. His eyes came back to my
hands. He held his own hand out and counted his digits slowly, “One, two, three, four, five —
I did not grasp his meaning then; afterwards I was to find that a great proportion of these
Beast People had malformed hands, lacking sometimes even three digits. But guessing this
was in some way a greeting, I did the same thing by way of reply. He grinned with immense
satisfaction. Then his swift roving glance went round again; he made a swift movement — and
vanished. The fern fronds he had stood between came swishing together,
I pushed out of the brake after him, and was astonished to find him swinging cheerfully
by one lank arm from a rope of creeper that looped down from the foliage overhead. His back
was to me.
“Hullo!” said I.
He came down with a twisting jump, and stood facing me.
“I say,” said I, “where can I get something to eat?”
“Eat!” he said. “Eat Man’s food, now.” And his eye went back to the swing of ropes. “At
the huts.”
“But where are the huts?”
“I’m new, you know.”
At that he swung round, and set off at a quick walk. All his motions were curiously rapid.
“Come along,” said he.
I went with him to see the adventure out. I guessed the huts were some rough shelterwhere he and some more of these Beast People lived. I might perhaps find them friendly, find
some handle in their minds to take hold of. I did not know how far they had forgotten their
human heritage.
My ape-like companion trotted along by my side, with his hands hanging down and his
jaw thrust forward. I wondered what memory he might have in him. “How long have you been
on this island?” said I.
“How long?” he asked; and after having the question repeated, he held up three fingers.
The creature was little better than an idiot. I tried to make out what he meant by that,
and it seems I bored him. After another question or two he suddenly left my side and went
leaping at some fruit that hung from a tree. He pulled down a handful of prickly husks and
went on eating the contents. I noted this with satisfaction, for here at least was a hint for
feeding. I tried him with some other questions, but his chattering, prompt responses were as
often as not quite at cross purposes with my question. Some few were appropriate, others
quite parrot-like.
I was so intent upon these peculiarities that I scarcely noticed the path we followed.
Presently we came to trees, all charred and brown, and so to a bare place covered with a
yellow-white incrustation, across which a drifting smoke, pungent in whiffs to nose and eyes,
went drifting. On our right, over a shoulder of bare rock, I saw the level blue of the sea. The
path coiled down abruptly into a narrow ravine between two tumbled and knotty masses of
blackish scoria. Into this we plunged.
It was extremely dark, this passage, after the blinding sunlight reflected from the
sulphurous ground. Its walls grew steep, and approached each other. Blotches of green and
crimson drifted across my eyes. My conductor stopped suddenly. “Home!” said he, and I
stood in a floor of a chasm that was at first absolutely dark to me. I heard some strange
noises, and thrust the knuckles of my left hand into my eyes. I became aware of a
disagreeable odor, like that of a monkey’s cage ill-cleaned. Beyond, the rock opened again
upon a gradual slope of sunlit greenery, and on either hand the light smote down through
narrow ways into the central gloom.
Chapter 12 — The Sayers of the Law

Then something cold touched my hand. I started violently, and saw close to me a dim
pinkish thing, looking more like a flayed child than anything else in the world. The creature had
exactly the mild but repulsive features of a sloth, the same low forehead and slow gestures.
As the first shock of the change of light passed, I saw about me more distinctly. The little
sloth-like creature was standing and staring at me. My conductor had vanished. The place
was a narrow passage between high walls of lava, a crack in the knotted rock, and on either
side interwoven heaps of sea-mat, palm-fans, and reeds leaning against the rock formed
rough and impenetrably dark dens. The winding way up the ravine between these was
scarcely three yards wide, and was disfigured by lumps of decaying fruit-pulp and other
refuse, which accounted for the disagreeable stench of the place.
The little pink sloth-creature was still blinking at me when my Ape-man reappeared at the
aperture of the nearest of these dens, and beckoned me in. As he did so a slouching monster
wriggled out of one of the places, further up this strange street, and stood up in featureless
silhouette against the bright green beyond, staring at me. I hesitated, having half a mind to
bolt the way I had come; and then, determined to go through with the adventure, I gripped my
nailed stick about the middle and crawled into the little evil-smelling lean-to after my
It was a semi-circular space, shaped like the half of a bee-hive; and against the rocky
wall that formed the inner side of it was a pile of variegated fruits, cocoa-nuts among others.
Some rough vessels of lava and wood stood about the floor, and one on a rough stool. There
was no fire. In the darkest corner of the hut sat a shapeless mass of darkness that grunted
“Hey!” as I came in, and my Ape-man stood in the dim light of the doorway and held out a split
cocoa-nut to me as I crawled into the other corner and squatted down. I took it, and began
gnawing it, as serenely as possible, in spite of a certain trepidation and the nearly intolerable
closeness of the den. The little pink sloth-creature stood in the aperture of the hut, and
something else with a drab face and bright eyes came staring over its shoulder.
“Hey!” came out of the lump of mystery opposite. “It is a man.”
“It is a man,” gabbled my conductor, “a man, a man, a five-man, like me.”
“Shut up!” said the voice from the dark, and grunted. I gnawed my cocoa-nut amid an
impressive stillness.
I peered hard into the blackness, but could distinguish nothing.
“It is a man,” the voice repeated. “He comes to live with us?”
It was a thick voice, with something in it — a kind of whistling overtone — that struck me
as peculiar; but the English accent was strangely good.
The Ape-man looked at me as though he expected something. I perceived the pause
was interrogative. “He comes to live with you,” I said.
“It is a man. He must learn the Law.”
I began to distinguish now a deeper blackness in the black, a vague outline of a
hunched-up figure. Then I noticed the opening of the place was darkened by two more black
heads. My hand tightened on my stick.
The thing in the dark repeated in a louder tone, “Say the words.” I had missed its last
remark. “Not to go on all-fours; that is the Law,” it repeated in a kind of sing-song.
I was puzzled.
“Say the words,” said the Ape-man, repeating, and the figures in the doorway echoed
this, with a threat in the tone of their voices.
I realised that I had to repeat this idiotic formula; and then began the insanest ceremony.The voice in the dark began intoning a mad litany, line by line, and I and the rest to repeat it.
As they did so, they swayed from side to side in the oddest way, and beat their hands upon
their knees; and I followed their example. I could have imagined I was already dead and in
another world. That dark hut, these grotesque dim figures, just flecked here and there by a
glimmer of light, and all of them swaying in unison and chanting,

Not to go on all-fours; that is the Law. Are we not Men?
Not to suck up Drink; that is the Law. Are we not Men?
Not to eat Fish or Flesh; that is the Law. Are we not Men?
Not to claw the Bark of Trees; that is the Law. Are we not Men?
Not to chase other Men; that is the Law. Are we not Men?

And so from the prohibition of these acts of folly, on to the prohibition of what I thought
then were the maddest, most impossible, and most indecent things one could well imagine. A
kind of rhythmic fervour fell on all of us; we gabbled and swayed faster and faster, repeating
this amazing Law. Superficially the contagion of these brutes was upon me, but deep down
within me the laughter and disgust struggled together. We ran through a long list of
prohibitions, and then the chant swung round to a new formula.

His is the House of Pain.
His is the Hand that makes.
His is the Hand that wounds.
His is the Hand that heals.

And so on for another long series, mostly quite incomprehensible gibberish to me about
Him, whoever he might be. I could have fancied it was a dream, but never before have I heard
chanting in a dream.
“His is the lightning flash,” we sang. “His is the deep, salt sea.”
A horrible fancy came into my head that Moreau, after animalising these men, had
infected their dwarfed brains with a kind of deification of himself. However, I was too keenly
aware of white teeth and strong claws about me to stop my chanting on that account.
“His are the stars in the sky.”
At last that song ended. I saw the Ape-man’s face shining with perspiration; and my eyes
being now accustomed to the darkness, I saw more distinctly the figure in the corner from
which the voice came. It was the size of a man, but it seemed covered with a dull grey hair
almost like a Skye-terrier. What was it? What were they all? Imagine yourself surrounded by
all the most horrible cripples and maniacs it is possible to conceive, and you may understand
a little of my feelings with these grotesque caricatures of humanity about me.
“He is a five-man, a five-man, a five-man — like me,” said the Ape-man.
I held out my hands. The grey creature in the corner leant forward.
“Not to run on all-fours; that is the Law. Are we not Men?” he said.
He put out a strangely distorted talon and gripped my fingers. The thing was almost like
the hoof of a deer produced into claws. I could have yelled with surprise and pain. His face
came forward and peered at my nails, came forward into the light of the opening of the hut
and I saw with a quivering disgust that it was like the face of neither man nor beast, but a
mere shock of grey hair, with three shadowy over-archings to mark the eyes and mouth.
“He has little nails,” said this grisly creature in his hairy beard. “It is well.”
He threw my hand down, and instinctively I gripped my stick.
“Eat roots and herbs; it is His will,” said the Ape-man.
“I am the Sayer of the Law,” said the grey figure. “Here come all that be new to learn the
Law. I sit in the darkness and say the Law.”“It is even so,” said one of the beasts in the doorway.
“Evil are the punishments of those who break the Law. None escape.”
“None escape,” said the Beast Folk, glancing furtively at one another.
“None, none,” said the Ape-man, — “none escape. See! I did a little thing, a wrong thing,
once. I jabbered, jabbered, stopped talking. None could understand. I am burnt, branded in
the hand. He is great. He is good!”
“None escape,” said the grey creature in the corner.
“None escape,” said the Beast People, looking askance at one another.
“For every one the want that is bad,” said the grey Sayer of the Law. “What you will want
we do not know; we shall know. Some want to follow things that move, to watch and slink and
wait and spring; to kill and bite, bite deep and rich, sucking the blood. It is bad. ‘Not to chase
other Men; that is the Law. Are we not Men? Not to eat Flesh or Fish; that is the Law. Are we
not Men?’”
“None escape,” said a dappled brute standing in the doorway.
“For every one the want is bad,” said the grey Sayer of the Law. “Some want to go
tearing with teeth and hands into the roots of things, snuffing into the earth. It is bad.”
“None escape,” said the men in the door.
“Some go clawing trees; some go scratching at the graves of the dead; some go fighting
with foreheads or feet or claws; some bite suddenly, none giving occasion; some love
“None escape,” said the Ape-man, scratching his calf.
“None escape,” said the little pink sloth-creature.
“Punishment is sharp and sure. Therefore learn the Law. Say the words.”
And incontinently he began again the strange litany of the Law, and again I and all these
creatures began singing and swaying. My head reeled with this jabbering and the close stench
of the place; but I kept on, trusting to find presently some chance of a new development.
“Not to go on all-fours; that is the Law. Are we not Men?”
We were making such a noise that I noticed nothing of a tumult outside, until some one,
who I think was one of the two Swine Men I had seen, thrust his head over the little pink
slothcreature and shouted something excitedly, something that I did not catch. Incontinently those
at the opening of the hut vanished; my Ape-man rushed out; the thing that had sat in the dark
followed him (I only observed that it was big and clumsy, and covered with silvery hair), and I
was left alone. Then before I reached the aperture I heard the yelp of a staghound.
In another moment I was standing outside the hovel, my chair-rail in my hand, every
muscle of me quivering. Before me were the clumsy backs of perhaps a score of these Beast
People, their misshapen heads half hidden by their shoulder-blades. They were gesticulating
excitedly. Other half-animal faces glared interrogation out of the hovels. Looking in the
direction in which they faced, I saw coming through the haze under the trees beyond the end
of the passage of dens the dark figure and awful white face of Moreau. He was holding the
leaping staghound back, and close behind him came Montgomery revolver in hand.
For a moment I stood horror-struck. I turned and saw the passage behind me blocked by
another heavy brute, with a huge grey face and twinkling little eyes, advancing towards me. I
looked round and saw to the right of me and a half-dozen yards in front of me a narrow gap in
the wall of rock through which a ray of light slanted into the shadows.
“Stop!” cried Moreau as I strode towards this, and then, “Hold him!”
At that, first one face turned towards me and then others. Their bestial minds were
happily slow. I dashed my shoulder into a clumsy monster who was turning to see what
Moreau meant, and flung him forward into another. I felt his hands fly round, clutching at me
and missing me. The little pink sloth-creature dashed at me, and I gashed down its ugly face
with the nail in my stick and in another minute was scrambling up a steep side pathway, a kind
of sloping chimney, out of the ravine. I heard a howl behind me, and cries of “Catch him!”“Hold him!” and the grey-faced creature appeared behind me and jammed his huge bulk into
the cleft. “Go on! go on!” they howled. I clambered up the narrow cleft in the rock and came
out upon the sulphur on the westward side of the village of the Beast Men.
That gap was altogether fortunate for me, for the narrow chimney, slanting obliquely
upward, must have impeded the nearer pursuers. I ran over the white space and down a
steep slope, through a scattered growth of trees, and came to a low-lying stretch of tall reeds,
through which I pushed into a dark, thick undergrowth that black and succulent under foot. As
I plunged into the reeds, my foremost pursuers emerged from the gap. I broke my way
through this undergrowth for some minutes. The air behind me and about me was soon full of
threatening cries. I heard the tumult of my pursuers in the gap up the slope, then the crashing
of the reeds, and every now and then the crackling crash of a branch. Some of the creatures
roared like excited beasts of prey. The staghound yelped to the left. I heard Moreau and
Montgomery shouting in the same direction. I turned sharply to the right. It seemed to me
even then that I heard Montgomery shouting for me to run for my life.
Presently the ground gave rich and oozy under my feet; but I was desperate and went
headlong into it, struggled through kneedeep, and so came to a winding path among tall
canes. The noise of my pursuers passed away to my left. In one place three strange, pink,
hopping animals, about the size of cats, bolted before my footsteps. This pathway ran up hill,
across another open space covered with white incrustation, and plunged into a canebrake
again. Then suddenly it turned parallel with the edge of a steep-walled gap, which came
without warning, like the ha-ha of an English park, — turned with an unexpected abruptness. I
was still running with all my might, and I never saw this drop until I was flying headlong
through the air.
I fell on my forearms and head, among thorns, and rose with a torn ear and bleeding
face. I had fallen into a precipitous ravine, rocky and thorny, full of a hazy mist which drifted
about me in wisps, and with a narrow streamlet from which this mist came meandering down
the centre. I was astonished at this thin fog in the full blaze of daylight; but I had no time to
stand wondering then. I turned to my right, down-stream, hoping to come to the sea in that
direction, and so have my way open to drown myself. It was only later I found that I had
dropped my nailed stick in my fall.
Presently the ravine grew narrower for a space, and carelessly I stepped into the stream.
I jumped out again pretty quickly, for the water was almost boiling. I noticed too there was a
thin sulphurous scum drifting upon its coiling water. Almost immediately came a turn in the
ravine, and the indistinct blue horizon. The nearer sea was flashing the sun from a myriad
facets. I saw my death before me; but I was hot and panting, with the warm blood oozing out
on my face and running pleasantly through my veins. I felt more than a touch of exultation
too, at having distanced my pursuers. It was not in me then to go out and drown myself yet. I
stared back the way I had come.
I listened. Save for the hum of the gnats and the chirp of some small insects that hopped
among the thorns, the air was absolutely still. Then came the yelp of a dog, very faint, and a
chattering and gibbering, the snap of a whip, and voices. They grew louder, then fainter again.
The noise receded up the stream and faded away. For a while the chase was over; but I knew
now how much hope of help for me lay in the Beast People.
Chapter 13 — A Parley

I turned again and went on down towards the sea. I found the hot stream broadened out
to a shallow, weedy sand, in which an abundance of crabs and long-bodied, many-legged
creatures started from my footfall. I walked to the very edge of the salt water, and then I felt I
was safe. I turned and stared, arms akimbo, at the thick green behind me, into which the
steamy ravine cut like a smoking gash. But, as I say, I was too full of excitement and (a true
saying, though those who have never known danger may doubt it) too desperate to die.
Then it came into my head that there was one chance before me yet. While Moreau and
Montgomery and their bestial rabble chased me through the island, might I not go round the
beach until I came to their enclosure, — make a flank march upon them, in fact, and then with
a rock lugged out of their loosely-built wall, perhaps, smash in the lock of the smaller door and
see what I could find (knife, pistol, or what not) to fight them with when they returned? It was
at any rate something to try.
So I turned to the westward and walked along by the water’s edge. The setting sun
flashed his blinding heat into my eyes. The slight Pacific tide was running in with a gentle
ripple. Presently the shore fell away southward, and the sun came round upon my right hand.
Then suddenly, far in front of me, I saw first one and then several figures emerging from the
bushes, — Moreau, with his grey staghound, then Montgomery, and two others. At that I
They saw me, and began gesticulating and advancing. I stood watching them approach.
The two Beast Men came running forward to cut me off from the undergrowth, inland.
Montgomery came, running also, but straight towards me. Moreau followed slower with the
At last I roused myself from my inaction, and turning seaward walked straight into the
water. The water was very shallow at first. I was thirty yards out before the waves reached to
my waist. Dimly I could see the intertidal creatures darting away from my feet.
“What are you doing, man?” cried Montgomery.
I turned, standing waist deep, and stared at them. Montgomery stood panting at the
margin of the water. His face was bright-red with exertion, his long flaxen hair blown about his
head, and his dropping nether lip showed his irregular teeth. Moreau was just coming up, his
face pale and firm, and the dog at his hand barked at me. Both men had heavy whips. Farther
up the beach stared the Beast Men.
“What am I doing? I am going to drown myself,” said I.
Montgomery and Moreau looked at each other. “Why?” asked Moreau.
“Because that is better than being tortured by you.”
“I told you so,” said Montgomery, and Moreau said something in a low tone.
“What makes you think I shall torture you?” asked Moreau.
“What I saw,” I said. “And those — yonder.”
“Hush!” said Moreau, and held up his hand.
“I will not,” said I. “They were men: what are they now? I at least will not be like them.”
I looked past my interlocutors. Up the beach were M’ling, Montgomery’s attendant, and
one of the white-swathed brutes from the boat. Farther up, in the shadow of the trees, I saw
my little Ape-man, and behind him some other dim figures.
“Who are these creatures?” said I, pointing to them and raising my voice more and more
that it might reach them. “They were men, men like yourselves, whom you have infected with
some bestial taint, — men whom you have enslaved, and whom you still fear. “You who
listen,” I cried, pointing now to Moreau and shouting past him to the Beast Men, —” You wholisten! Do you not see these men still fear you, go in dread of you? Why, then, do you fear
them? You are many —”
“For God’s sake,” cried Montgomery, “stop that, Prendick!”
“Prendick!” cried Moreau.
They both shouted together, as if to drown my voice; and behind them lowered the
staring faces of the Beast Men, wondering, their deformed hands hanging down, their
shoulders hunched up. They seemed, as I fancied, to be trying to understand me, to
remember, I thought, something of their human past.
I went on shouting, I scarcely remember what, — that Moreau and Montgomery could be
killed, that they were not to be feared: that was the burden of what I put into the heads of the
Beast People. I saw the green-eyed man in the dark rags, who had met me on the evening of
my arrival, come out from among the trees, and others followed him, to hear me better. At
last for want of breath I paused.
“Listen to me for a moment,” said the steady voice of Moreau; “and then say what you
“Well?” said I.
He coughed, thought, then shouted: “Latin, Prendick! bad Latin, schoolboy Latin; but try
and understand. Hi non sunt homines; sunt animalia qui nos habemus — vivisected. A
humanising process. I will explain. Come ashore.”
I laughed. “A pretty story,” said I. “They talk, build houses. They were men. It’s likely I’ll
come ashore.”
“The water just beyond where you stand is deep — and full of sharks.”
“That’s my way,” said I. “Short and sharp. Presently.”
“Wait a minute.” He took something out of his pocket that flashed back the sun, and
dropped the object at his feet. “That’s a loaded revolver,” said he. “Montgomery here will do
the same. Now we are going up the beach until you are satisfied the distance is safe. Then
come and take the revolvers.”
“Not I! You have a third between you.”
“I want you to think over things, Prendick. In the first place, I never asked you to come
upon this island. If we vivisected men, we should import men, not beasts. In the next, we had
you drugged last night, had we wanted to work you any mischief; and in the next, now your
first panic is over and you can think a little, is Montgomery here quite up to the character you
give him? We have chased you for your good. Because this island is full of inimical
phenomena. Besides, why should we want to shoot you when you have just offered to drown
“Why did you set — your people onto me when I was in the hut?”
“We felt sure of catching you, and bringing you out of danger. Afterwards we drew away
from the scent, for your good.”
I mused. It seemed just possible. Then I remembered something again. “But I saw,” said
I, “in the enclosure —”
“That was the puma.”
“Look here, Prendick,” said Montgomery, “you’re a silly ass! Come out of the water and
take these revolvers, and talk. We can’t do anything more than we could do now.”
I will confess that then, and indeed always, I distrusted and dreaded Moreau; but
Montgomery was a man I felt I understood.
“Go up the beach,” said I, after thinking, and added, “holding your hands up.”
“Can’t do that,” said Montgomery, with an explanatory nod over his shoulder.
“Go up to the trees, then,” said I, “as you please.”
“It’s a damned silly ceremony,” said Montgomery.
Both turned and faced the six or seven grotesque creatures, who stood there in thesunlight, solid, casting shadows, moving, and yet so incredibly unreal. Montgomery cracked
his whip at them, and forthwith they all turned and fled helter-skelter into the trees; and when
Montgomery and Moreau were at a distance I judged sufficient, I waded ashore, and picked
up and examined the revolvers. To satisfy myself against the subtlest trickery, I discharged
one at a round lump of lava, and had the satisfaction of seeing the stone pulverised and the
beach splashed with lead. Still I hesitated for a moment.
“I’ll take the risk,” said I, at last; and with a revolver in each hand I walked up the beach
towards them.
“That’s better,” said Moreau, without affectation. “As it is, you have wasted the best part
of my day with your confounded imagination.” And with a touch of contempt which humiliated
me, he and Montgomery turned and went on in silence before me.
The knot of Beast Men, still wondering, stood back among the trees. I passed them as
serenely as possible. One started to follow me, but retreated again when Montgomery
cracked his whip. The rest stood silent — watching. They may once have been animals; but I
never before saw an animal trying to think.
Chapter 14 — Doctor Moreau Explains

“And now, Prendick, I will explain,” said Doctor Moreau, so soon as we had eaten and
drunk. “I must confess that you are the most dictatorial guest I ever entertained. I warn you
that this is the last I shall do to oblige you. The next thing you threaten to commit suicide
about, I shan’t do, — even at some personal inconvenience.”
He sat in my deck chair, a cigar half consumed in his white, dexterous-looking fingers.
The light of the swinging lamp fell on his white hair; he stared through the little window out at
the starlight. I sat as far away from him as possible, the table between us and the revolvers to
hand. Montgomery was not present. I did not care to be with the two of them in such a little
“You admit that the vivisected human being, as you called it, is, after all, only the puma?”
said Moreau. He had made me visit that horror in the inner room, to assure myself of its
“It is the puma,” I said, “still alive, but so cut and mutilated as I pray I may never see
living flesh again. Of all vile —”
“Never mind that,” said Moreau; “at least, spare me those youthful horrors. Montgomery
used to be just the same. You admit that it is the puma. Now be quiet, while I reel off my
physiological lecture to you.”
And forthwith, beginning in the tone of a man supremely bored, but presently warming a
little, he explained his work to me. He was very simple and convincing. Now and then there
was a touch of sarcasm in his voice. Presently I found myself hot with shame at our mutual
The creatures I had seen were not men, had never been men. They were animals,
humanised animals, — triumphs of vivisection.
“You forget all that a skilled vivisector can do with living things,” said Moreau. “For my
own part, I’m puzzled why the things I have done here have not been done before. Small
efforts, of course, have been made, — amputation, tongue-cutting, excisions. Of course you
know a squint may be induced or cured by surgery? Then in the case of excisions you have all
kinds of secondary changes, pigmentary disturbances, modifications of the passions,
alterations in the secretion of fatty tissue. I have no doubt you have heard of these things?”
“Of course,” said I. “But these foul creatures of yours —”
“All in good time,” said he, waving his hand at me; “I am only beginning. Those are trivial
cases of alteration. Surgery can do better things than that. There is building up as well as
breaking down and changing. You have heard, perhaps, of a common surgical operation
resorted to in cases where the nose has been destroyed: a flap of skin is cut from the
forehead, turned down on the nose, and heals in the new position. This is a kind of grafting in
a new position of part of an animal upon itself. Grafting of freshly obtained material from
another animal is also possible, — the case of teeth, for example. The grafting of skin and
bone is done to facilitate healing: the surgeon places in the middle of the wound pieces of skin
snipped from another animal, or fragments of bone from a victim freshly killed. Hunter’s
cockspur — possibly you have heard of that — flourished on the bull’s neck; and the rhinoceros
rats of the Algerian zouaves are also to be thought of, — monsters manufactured by
transferring a slip from the tail of an ordinary rat to its snout, and allowing it to heal in that
“Monsters manufactured!” said I. “Then you mean to tell me —”
“Yes. These creatures you have seen are animals carven and wrought into new shapes.
To that, to the study of the plasticity of living forms, my life has been devoted. I have studiedfor years, gaining in knowledge as I go. I see you look horrified, and yet I am telling you
nothing new. It all lay in the surface of practical anatomy years ago, but no one had the
temerity to touch it. It is not simply the outward form of an animal which I can change. The
physiology, the chemical rhythm of the creature, may also be made to undergo an enduring
modification, — of which vaccination and other methods of inoculation with living or dead
matter are examples that will, no doubt, be familiar to you. A similar operation is the
transfusion of blood, — with which subject, indeed, I began. These are all familiar cases. Less
so, and probably far more extensive, were the operations of those mediaeval practitioners
who made dwarfs and beggar-cripples, show-monsters, — some vestiges of whose art still
remain in the preliminary manipulation of the young mountebank or contortionist. Victor Hugo
gives an account of them in ‘L’Homme qui Rit.’ — But perhaps my meaning grows plain now.
You begin to see that it is a possible thing to transplant tissue from one part of an animal to
another, or from one animal to another; to alter its chemical reactions and methods of growth;
to modify the articulations of its limbs; and, indeed, to change it in its most intimate structure.
“And yet this extraordinary branch of knowledge has never been sought as an end, and
systematically, by modern investigators until I took it up! Some of such things have been hit
upon in the last resort of surgery; most of the kindred evidence that will recur to your mind
has been demonstrated as it were by accident, — by tyrants, by criminals, by the breeders of
horses and dogs, by all kinds of untrained clumsy-handed men working for their own
immediate ends. I was the first man to take up this question armed with antiseptic surgery,
and with a really scientific knowledge of the laws of growth. Yet one would imagine it must
have been practised in secret before. Such creatures as the Siamese Twins — And in the
vaults of the Inquisition. No doubt their chief aim was artistic torture, but some at least of the
inquisitors must have had a touch of scientific curiosity.”
“But,” said I, “these things — these animals talk!”
He said that was so, and proceeded to point out that the possibility of vivisection does
not stop at a mere physical metamorphosis. A pig may be educated. The mental structure is
even less determinate than the bodily. In our growing science of hypnotism we find the
promise of a possibility of superseding old inherent instincts by new suggestions, grafting upon
or replacing the inherited fixed ideas. Very much indeed of what we call moral education, he
said, is such an artificial modification and perversion of instinct; pugnacity is trained into
courageous self-sacrifice, and suppressed sexuality into religious emotion. And the great
difference between man and monkey is in the larynx, he continued, — in the incapacity to
frame delicately different sound-symbols by which thought could be sustained. In this I failed
to agree with him, but with a certain incivility he declined to notice my objection. He repeated
that the thing was so, and continued his account of his work.
I asked him why he had taken the human form as a model. There seemed to me then,
and there still seems to me now, a strange wickedness for that choice.
He confessed that he had chosen that form by chance. “I might just as well have worked
to form sheep into llamas and llamas into sheep. I suppose there is something in the human
form that appeals to the artistic turn more powerfully than any animal shape can. But I’ve not
confined myself to man-making. Once or twice —” He was silent, for a minute perhaps.
“These years! How they have slipped by! And here I have wasted a day saving your life, and
am now wasting an hour explaining myself!”
“But,” said I, “I still do not understand. Where is your justification for inflicting all this
pain? The only thing that could excuse vivisection to me would be some application —”
“Precisely,” said he. “But, you see, I am differently constituted. We are on different
platforms. You are a materialist.”
“I am not a materialist,” I began hotly.
“In my view — in my view. For it is just this question of pain that parts us. So long as
visible or audible pain turns you sick; so long as your own pains drive you; so long as painunderlies your propositions about sin, — so long, I tell you, you are an animal, thinking a little
less obscurely what an animal feels. This pain —”
I gave an impatient shrug at such sophistry.
“Oh, but it is such a little thing! A mind truly opened to what science has to teach must
see that it is a little thing. It may be that save in this little planet, this speck of cosmic dust,
invisible long before the nearest star could be attained — it may be, I say, that nowhere else
does this thing called pain occur. But the laws we feel our way towards — Why, even on this
earth, even among living things, what pain is there?”
As he spoke he drew a little penknife from his pocket, opened the smaller blade, and
moved his chair so that I could see his thigh. Then, choosing the place deliberately, he drove
the blade into his leg and withdrew it.
“No doubt,” he said, “you have seen that before. It does not hurt a pin-prick. But what
does it show? The capacity for pain is not needed in the muscle, and it is not placed there, —
is but little needed in the skin, and only here and there over the thigh is a spot capable of
feeling pain. Pain is simply our intrinsic medical adviser to warn us and stimulate us. Not all
living flesh is painful; nor is all nerve, not even all sensory nerve. There’s no tint of pain, real
pain, in the sensations of the optic nerve. If you wound the optic nerve, you merely see
flashes of light, — just as disease of the auditory nerve merely means a humming in our ears.
Plants do not feel pain, nor the lower animals; it’s possible that such animals as the starfish
and crayfish do not feel pain at all. Then with men, the more intelligent they become, the more
intelligently they will see after their own welfare, and the less they will need the goad to keep
them out of danger. I never yet heard of a useless thing that was not ground out of existence
by evolution sooner or later. Did you? And pain gets needless.
“Then I am a religious man, Prendick, as every sane man must be. It may be, I fancy,
that I have seen more of the ways of this world’s Maker than you, — for I have sought his
laws, in my way, all my life, while you, I understand, have been collecting butterflies. And I tell
you, pleasure and pain have nothing to do with heaven or hell. Pleasure and pain — bah!
What is your theologian’s ecstasy but Mahomet’s houri in the dark? This store which men and
women set on pleasure and pain, Prendick, is the mark of the beast upon them, — the mark
of the beast from which they came! Pain, pain and pleasure, they are for us only so long as
we wriggle in the dust.
“You see, I went on with this research just the way it led me. That is the only way I ever
heard of true research going. I asked a question, devised some method of obtaining an
answer, and got a fresh question. Was this possible or that possible? You cannot imagine
what this means to an investigator, what an intellectual passion grows upon him! You cannot
imagine the strange, colourless delight of these intellectual desires! The thing before you is no
longer an animal, a fellow-creature, but a problem! Sympathetic pain, — all I know of it I
remember as a thing I used to suffer from years ago. I wanted — it was the one thing I
wanted — to find out the extreme limit of plasticity in a living shape.”
“But,” said I, “the thing is an abomination —”
“To this day I have never troubled about the ethics of the matter,” he continued. “The
study of Nature makes a man at last as remorse-less as Nature. I have gone on, not heeding
anything but the question I was pursuing; and the material has — dripped into the huts
yonder. It is really eleven years since we came here, I and Montgomery and six Kanakas. I
remember the green stillness of the island and the empty ocean about us, as though it was
yesterday. The place seemed waiting for me.
“The stores were landed and the house was built. The Kanakas founded some huts near
the ravine. I went to work here upon what I had brought with me. There were some
disagreeable things happened at first. I began with a sheep, and killed it after a day and a half
by a slip of the scalpel. I took another sheep, and made a thing of pain and fear and left it
bound up to heal. It looked quite human to me when I had finished it; but when I went to it Iwas discontented with it. It remembered me, and was terrified beyond imagination; and it had
no more than the wits of a sheep. The more I looked at it the clumsier it seemed, until at last I
put the monster out of its misery. These animals without courage, these fear-haunted,
paindriven things, without a spark of pugnacious energy to face torment, — they are no good for
“Then I took a gorilla I had; and upon that, working with infinite care and mastering
difficulty after difficulty, I made my first man. All the week, night and day, I moulded him. With
him it was chiefly the brain that needed moulding; much had to be added, much changed. I
thought him a fair specimen of the negroid type when I had finished him, and he lay
bandaged, bound, and motionless before me. It was only when his life was assured that I left
him and came into this room again, and found Montgomery much as you are. He had heard
some of the cries as the thing grew human, — cries like those that disturbed you so. I didn’t
take him completely into my confidence at first. And the Kanakas too, had realised something
of it. They were scared out of their wits by the sight of me. I got Montgomery over to me — in
a way; but I and he had the hardest job to prevent the Kanakas deserting. Finally they did;
and so we lost the yacht. I spent many days educating the brute, — altogether I had him for
three or four months. I taught him the rudiments of English; gave him ideas of counting; even
made the thing read the alphabet. But at that he was slow, though I’ve met with idiots slower.
He began with a clean sheet, mentally; had no memories left in his mind of what he had been.
When his scars were quite healed, and he was no longer anything but painful and stiff, and
able to converse a little, I took him yonder and introduced him to the Kanakas as an
interesting stowaway.
“They were horribly afraid of him at first, somehow, — which offended me rather, for I
was conceited about him; but his ways seemed so mild, and he was so abject, that after a
time they received him and took his education in hand. He was quick to learn, very imitative
and adaptive, and built himself a hovel rather better, it seemed to me, than their own shanties.
There was one among the boys a bit of a missionary, and he taught the thing to read, or at
least to pick out letters, and gave him some rudimentary ideas of morality; but it seems the
beast’s habits were not all that is desirable.
“I rested from work for some days after this, and was in a mind to write an account of the
whole affair to wake up English physiology. Then I came upon the creature squatting up in a
tree and gibbering at two of the Kanakas who had been teasing him. I threatened him, told
him the inhumanity of such a proceeding, aroused his sense of shame, and came home
resolved to do better before I took my work back to England. I have been doing better. But
somehow the things drift back again: the stubborn beast-flesh grows day by day back again.
But I mean to do better things still. I mean to conquer that. This puma —
“But that’s the story. All the Kanaka boys are dead now; one fell overboard of the launch,
and one died of a wounded heel that he poisoned in some way with plant-juice. Three went
away in the yacht, and I suppose and hope were drowned. The other one — was killed. Well, I
have replaced them. Montgomery went on much as you are disposed to do at first, and then

“What became of the other one?” said I, sharply, — “the other Kanaka who was killed?”
“The fact is, after I had made a number of human creatures I made a Thing.” He
“Yes,” said I.
“It was killed.”
“I don’t understand,” said I; “do you mean to say —”
“It killed the Kanakas — yes. It killed several other things that it caught. We chased it for
a couple of days. It only got loose by accident — I never meant it to get away. It wasn’t
finished. It was purely an experiment. It was a limbless thing, with a horrible face, that writhed
along the ground in a serpentine fashion. It was immensely strong, and in infuriating pain. Itlurked in the woods for some days, until we hunted it; and then it wriggled into the northern
part of the island, and we divided the party to close in upon it. Montgomery insisted upon
coming with me. The man had a rifle; and when his body was found, one of the barrels was
curved into the shape of an S and very nearly bitten through. Montgomery shot the thing.
After that I stuck to the ideal of humanity — except for little things.”
He became silent. I sat in silence watching his face.
“So for twenty years altogether — counting nine years in England — I have been going
on; and there is still something in everything I do that defeats me, makes me dissatisfied,
challenges me to further effort. Sometimes I rise above my level, sometimes I fall below it; but
always I fall short of the things I dream. The human shape I can get now, almost with ease,
so that it is lithe and graceful, or thick and strong; but often there is trouble with the hands and
the claws, — painful things, that I dare not shape too freely. But it is in the subtle grafting and
reshaping one must needs do to the brain that my trouble lies. The intelligence is often oddly
low, with unaccountable blank ends, unexpected gaps. And least satisfactory of all is
something that I cannot touch, somewhere — I cannot determine where — in the seat of the
emotions. Cravings, instincts, desires that harm humanity, a strange hidden reservoir to burst
forth suddenly and inundate the whole being of the creature with anger, hate, or fear. These
creatures of mine seemed strange and uncanny to you so soon as you began to observe
them; but to me, just after I make them, they seem to be indisputably human beings. It’s
afterwards, as I observe them, that the persuasion fades. First one animal trait, then another,
creeps to the surface and stares out at me. But I will conquer yet! Each time I dip a living
creature into the bath of burning pain, I say, ‘This time I will burn out all the animal; this time I
will make a rational creature of my own!’ After all, what is ten years? Men have been a
hundred thousand in the making.” He thought darkly. “But I am drawing near the fastness.
This puma of mine —” After a silence, “And they revert. As soon as my hand is taken from
them the beast begins to creep back, begins to assert itself again.” Another long silence.
“Then you take the things you make into those dens?” said I.
“They go. I turn them out when I begin to feel the beast in them, and presently they
wander there. They all dread this house and me. There is a kind of travesty of humanity over
there. Montgomery knows about it, for he interferes in their affairs. He has trained one or two
of them to our service. He’s ashamed of it, but I believe he half likes some of those beasts.
It’s his business, not mine. They only sicken me with a sense of failure. I take no interest in
them. I fancy they follow in the lines the Kanaka missionary marked out, and have a kind of
mockery of a rational life, poor beasts! There’s something they call the Law. Sing hymns
about ‘all thine.’ They build themselves their dens, gather fruit, and pull herbs — marry even.
But I can see through it all, see into their very souls, and see there nothing but the souls of
beasts, beasts that perish, anger and the lusts to live and gratify themselves. — Yet they’re
odd; complex, like everything else alive. There is a kind of upward striving in them, part vanity,
part waste sexual emotion, part waste curiosity. It only mocks me. I have some hope of this
puma. I have worked hard at her head and brain — “And now,” said he, standing up after a
long gap of silence, during which we had each pursued our own thoughts, “what do you think?
Are you in fear of me still?”
I looked at him, and saw but a white-faced, white-haired man, with calm eyes. Save for
his serenity, the touch almost of beauty that resulted from his set tranquillity and his
magnificent build, he might have passed muster among a hundred other comfortable old
gentlemen. Then I shivered. By way of answer to his second question, I handed him a
revolver with either hand.
“Keep them,” he said, and snatched at a yawn. He stood up, stared at me for a moment,
and smiled. “You have had two eventful days,” said he. “I should advise some sleep. I’m glad
it’s all clear. Good-night.” He thought me over for a moment, then went out by the inner door.
I immediately turned the key in the outer one. I sat down again; sat for a time in a kind ofstagnant mood, so weary, emotionally, mentally, and physically, that I could not think beyond
the point at which he had left me. The black window stared at me like an eye. At last with an
effort I put out the light and got into the hammock. Very soon I was asleep.
Chapter 15 — Concerning the Beast Folk

I woke early. Moreau’s explanation stood before my mind, clear and definite, from the
moment of my awakening. I got out of the hammock and went to the door to assure myself
that the key was turned. Then I tried the window-bar, and found it firmly fixed. That these
man-like creatures were in truth only bestial monsters, mere grotesque travesties of men,
filled me with a vague uncertainty of their possibilities which was far worse than any definite
A tapping came at the door, and I heard the glutinous accents of M’ling speaking. I
pocketed one of the revolvers (keeping one hand upon it), and opened to him.
“Good-morning, sair,” he said, bringing in, in addition to the customary herb-breakfast,
an ill-cooked rabbit. Montgomery followed him. His roving eye caught the position of my arm
and he smiled askew.
The puma was resting to heal that day; but Moreau, who was singularly solitary in his
habits, did not join us. I talked with Montgomery to clear my ideas of the way in which the
Beast Folk lived. In particular, I was urgent to know how these inhuman monsters were kept
from falling upon Moreau and Montgomery and from rending one another. He explained to me
that the comparative safety of Moreau and himself was due to the limited mental scope of
these monsters. In spite of their increased intelligence and the tendency of their animal
instincts to reawaken, they had certain fixed ideas implanted by Moreau in their minds, which
absolutely bounded their imaginations. They were really hypnotised; had been told that certain
things were impossible, and that certain things were not to be done, and these prohibitions
were woven into the texture of their minds beyond any possibility of disobedience or dispute.
Certain matters, however, in which old instinct was at war with Moreau’s convenience,
were in a less stable condition. A series of propositions called the Law (I bad already heard
them recited) battled in their minds with the deep-seated, ever-rebellious cravings of their
animal natures. This Law they were ever repeating, I found, and ever breaking. Both
Montgomery and Moreau displayed particular solicitude to keep them ignorant of the taste of
blood; they feared the inevitable suggestions of that flavour. Montgomery told me that the
Law, especially among the feline Beast People, became oddly weakened about nightfall; that
then the animal was at its strongest; that a spirit of adventure sprang up in them at the dusk,
when they would dare things they never seemed to dream about by day. To that I owed my
stalking by the Leopard-man, on the night of my arrival. But during these earlier days of my
stay they broke the Law only furtively and after dark; in the daylight there was a general
atmosphere of respect for its multifarious prohibitions.
And here perhaps I may give a few general facts about the island and the Beast People.
The island, which was of irregular outline and lay low upon the wide sea, had a total area, I
suppose, of seven or eight square miles. It was volcanic in origin, and was now fringed on
three sides by coral reefs; some fumaroles to the northward, and a hot spring, were the only
vestiges of the forces that had long since originated it. Now and then a faint quiver of
earthquake would be sensible, and sometimes the ascent of the spire of smoke would be
rendered tumultuous by gusts of steam; but that was all. The population of the island,
Montgomery informed me, now numbered rather more than sixty of these strange creations of
Moreau’s art, not counting the smaller monstrosities which lived in the undergrowth and were
without human form. Altogether he had made nearly a hundred and twenty; but many had
died, and others — like the writhing Footless Thing of which he had told me — had come by
violent ends. In answer to my question, Montgomery said that they actually bore offspring, but
that these generally died. When they lived, Moreau took them and stamped the human formupon them. There was no evidence of the inheritance of their acquired human characteristics.
The females were less numerous than the males, and liable to much furtive persecution in
spite of the monogamy the Law enjoined.
It would be impossible for me to describe these Beast People in detail; my eye has had
no training in details, and unhappily I cannot sketch. Most striking, perhaps, in their general
appearance was the disproportion between the legs of these creatures and the length of their
bodies; and yet — so relative is our idea of grace — my eye became habituated to their
forms, and at last I even fell in with their persuasion that my own long thighs were ungainly.
Another point was the forward carriage of the head and the clumsy and inhuman curvature of
the spine. Even the Ape-man lacked that inward sinuous curve of the back which makes the
human figure so graceful. Most had their shoulders hunched clumsily, and their short
forearms hung weakly at their sides. Few of them were conspicuously hairy, at least until the
end of my time upon the island.
The next most obvious deformity was in their faces, almost all of which were
prognathous, malformed about the ears, with large and protuberant noses, very furry or very
bristly hair, and often strangely-coloured or strangely-placed eyes. None could laugh, though
the Ape-man had a chattering titter. Beyond these general characters their heads had little in
common; each preserved the quality of its particular species: the human mark distorted but
did not hide the leopard, the ox, or the sow, or other animal or animals, from which the
creature had been moulded. The voices, too, varied exceedingly. The hands were always
malformed; and though some surprised me by their unexpected human appearance, almost
all were deficient in the number of the digits, clumsy about the finger-nails, and lacking any
tactile sensibility.
The two most formidable Animal Men were my Leopard-man and a creature made of
hyena and swine. Larger than these were the three bull-creatures who pulled in the boat.
Then came the silvery-hairy-man, who was also the Sayer of the Law, M’ling, and a satyr-like
creature of ape and goat. There were three Swine-men and a Swine-woman, a
marerhinoceros-creature, and several other females whose sources I did not ascertain. There were
several wolf-creatures, a bear-bull, and a Saint-Bernard-man. I have already described the
Ape-man, and there was a particularly hateful (and evil-smelling) old woman made of vixen
and bear, whom I hated from the beginning. She was said to be a passionate votary of the
Law. Smaller creatures were certain dappled youths and my little sloth-creature. But enough
of this catalogue.
At first I had a shivering horror of the brutes, felt all too keenly that they were still brutes;
but insensibly I became a little habituated to the idea of them, and moreover I was affected by
Montgomery’s attitude towards them. He had been with them so long that he had come to
regard them as almost normal human beings. His London days seemed a glorious, impossible
past to him. Only once in a year or so did he go to Arica to deal with Moreau’s agent, a trader
in animals there. He hardly met the finest type of mankind in that seafaring village of Spanish
mongrels. The men aboard-ship, he told me, seemed at first just as strange to him as the
Beast Men seemed to me, — unnaturally long in the leg, flat in the face, prominent in the
forehead, suspicious, dangerous, and cold-hearted. In fact, he did not like men: his heart had
warmed to me, he thought, because he had saved my life. I fancied even then that he had a
sneaking kindness for some of these metamorphosed brutes, a vicious sympathy with some
of their ways, but that he attempted to veil it from me at first.
M’ling, the black-faced man, Montgomery’s attendant, the first of the Beast Folk I had
encountered, did not live with the others across the island, but in a small kennel at the back of
the enclosure. The creature was scarcely so intelligent as the Ape-man, but far more docile,
and the most human-looking of all the Beast Folk; and Montgomery had trained it to prepare
food, and indeed to discharge all the trivial domestic offices that were required. It was a
complex trophy of Moreau’s horrible skill, — a bear, tainted with dog and ox, and one of themost elaborately made of all his creatures. It treated Montgomery with a strange tenderness
and devotion. Sometimes he would notice it, pat it, call it half-mocking, half-jocular names,
and so make it caper with extraordinary delight; sometimes he would ill-treat it, especially after
he had been at the whiskey, kicking it, beating it, pelting it with stones or lighted fusees. But
whether he treated it well or ill, it loved nothing so much as to be near him.
I say I became habituated to the Beast People, that a thousand things which had
seemed unnatural and repulsive speedily became natural and ordinary to me. I suppose
everything in existence takes its colour from the average hue of our surroundings.
Montgomery and Moreau were too peculiar and individual to keep my general impressions of
humanity well defined. I would see one of the clumsy bovine-creatures who worked the launch
treading heavily through the undergrowth, and find myself asking, trying hard to recall, how he
differed from some really human yokel trudging home from his mechanical labours; or I would
meet the Fox-bear woman’s vulpine, shifty face, strangely human in its speculative cunning,
and even imagine I had met it before in some city byway.
Yet every now and then the beast would flash out upon me beyond doubt or denial. An
ugly-looking man, a hunch-backed human savage to all appearance, squatting in the aperture
of one of the dens, would stretch his arms and yawn, showing with startling suddenness
scissor-edged incisors and sabre-like canines, keen and brilliant as knives. Or in some narrow
pathway, glancing with a transitory daring into the eyes of some lithe, white-swathed female
figure, I would suddenly see (with a spasmodic revulsion) that she had slit-like pupils, or
glancing down note the curving nail with which she held her shapeless wrap about her. It is a
curious thing, by the bye, for which I am quite unable to account, that these weird creatures
— the females, I mean — had in the earlier days of my stay an instinctive sense of their own
repulsive clumsiness, and displayed in consequence a more than human regard for the
decency and decorum of extensive costume.
Chapter 16 — How the Beast Folk Taste Blood

My inexperience as a writer betrays me, and I wander from the thread of my story.
After I had breakfasted with Montgomery, he took me across the island to see the
fumarole and the source of the hot spring into whose scalding waters I had blundered on the
previous day. Both of us carried whips and loaded revolvers. While going through a leafy
jungle on our road thither, we heard a rabbit squealing. We stopped and listened, but we
heard no more; and presently we went on our way, and the incident dropped out of our minds.
Montgomery called my attention to certain little pink animals with long hind-legs, that went
leaping through the undergrowth. He told me they were creatures made of the offspring of the
Beast People, that Moreau had invented. He had fancied they might serve for meat, but a
rabbit-like habit of devouring their young had defeated this intention. I had already
encountered some of these creatures, — once during my moonlight flight from the
Leopardman, and once during my pursuit by Moreau on the previous day. By chance, one hopping to
avoid us leapt into the hole caused by the uprooting of a wind-blown tree; before it could
extricate itself we managed to catch it. It spat like a cat, scratched and kicked vigorously with
its hind-legs, and made an attempt to bite; but its teeth were too feeble to inflict more than a
painless pinch. It seemed to me rather a pretty little creature; and as Montgomery stated that
it never destroyed the turf by burrowing, and was very cleanly in its habits, I should imagine it
might prove a convenient substitute for the common rabbit in gentlemen’s parks.
We also saw on our way the trunk of a tree barked in long strips and splintered deeply.
Montgomery called my attention to this. “Not to claw bark of trees, that is the Law,” he said.
“Much some of them care for it!” It was after this, I think, that we met the Satyr and the
Apeman. The Satyr was a gleam of classical memory on the part of Moreau, — his face ovine in
expression, like the coarser Hebrew type; his voice a harsh bleat, his nether extremities
Satanic. He was gnawing the husk of a pod-like fruit as he passed us. Both of them saluted
“Hail,” said they, “to the Other with the Whip!”
“There’s a Third with a Whip now,” said Montgomery. “So you’d better mind!”
“Was he not made?” said the Ape-man. “He said — he said he was made.”
The Satyr-man looked curiously at me. “The Third with the Whip, he that walks weeping
into the sea, has a thin white face.”
“He has a thin long whip,” said Montgomery.
“Yesterday he bled and wept,” said the Satyr. “You never bleed nor weep. The Master
does not bleed or weep.”
“Ollendorffian beggar!” said Montgomery, “you’ll bleed and weep if you don’t look out!”
“He has five fingers, he is a five-man like me,” said the Ape-man.
“Come along, Prendick,” said Montgomery, taking my arm; and I went on with him.
The Satyr and the Ape-man stood watching us and making other remarks to each other.
“He says nothing,” said the Satyr. “Men have voices.”
“Yesterday he asked me of things to eat,” said the Ape-man. “He did not know.”
Then they spoke inaudible things, and I heard the Satyr laughing.
It was on our way back that we came upon the dead rabbit. The red body of the
wretched little beast was rent to pieces, many of the ribs stripped white, and the backbone
indisputably gnawed.
At that Montgomery stopped. “Good God!” said he, stooping down, and picking up some
of the crushed vertebrae to examine them more closely. “Good God!” he repeated, “what can
this mean?”“Some carnivore of yours has remembered its old habits,” I said after a pause. “This
backbone has been bitten through.”
He stood staring, with his face white and his lip pulled askew. “I don’t like this,” he said
“I saw something of the same kind,” said I, “the first day I came here.”
“The devil you did! What was it?”
“A rabbit with its head twisted off.”
“The day you came here?”
“The day I came here. In the undergrowth at the back of the enclosure, when I went out
in the evening. The head was completely wrung off.”
He gave a long, low whistle.
“And what is more, I have an idea which of your brutes did the thing. It’s only a suspicion,
you know. Before I came on the rabbit I saw one of your monsters drinking in the stream.”
“Sucking his drink?”
“‘Not to suck your drink; that is the Law.’ Much the brutes care for the Law, eh? when
Moreau’s not about!”
“It was the brute who chased me.”
“Of course,” said Montgomery; “it’s just the way with carnivores. After a kill, they drink.
It’s the taste of blood, you know. — What was the brute like?” he continued. “Would you know
him again?” He glanced about us, standing astride over the mess of dead rabbit, his eyes
roving among the shadows and screens of greenery, the lurking-places and ambuscades of
the forest that bounded us in. “The taste of blood,” he said again.
He took out his revolver, examined the cartridges in it and replaced it. Then he began to
pull at his dropping lip.
“I think I should know the brute again,” I said. “I stunned him. He ought to have a
handsome bruise on the forehead of him.”
“But then we have to prove that he killed the rabbit,” said Montgomery. “I wish I’d never
brought the things here.”
I should have gone on, but he stayed there thinking over the mangled rabbit in a
puzzleheaded way. As it was, I went to such a distance that the rabbit’s remains were hidden.
“Come on!” I said.
Presently he woke up and came towards me. “You see,” he said, almost in a whisper,
“they are all supposed to have a fixed idea against eating anything that runs on land. If some
brute has by any accident tasted blood He went on some way in silence. “I wonder what can
have happened,” he said to himself. Then, after a pause again: “I did a foolish thing the other
day. That servant of mine — I showed him how to skin and cook a rabbit. It’s odd — I saw
him licking his hands — It never occurred to me.” Then: “We must put a stop to this. I must
tell Moreau.”
He could think of nothing else on our homeward journey.
Moreau took the matter even more seriously than Montgomery, and I need scarcely say
that I was affected by their evident consternation.
“We must make an example,” said Moreau. “I’ve no doubt in my own mind that the
Leopard-man was the sinner. But how can we prove it? I wish, Montgomery, you had kept
your taste for meat in hand, and gone without these exciting novelties. We may find ourselves
in a mess yet, through it.”
“I was a silly ass,” said Montgomery. “But the thing’s done now; and you said I might
have them, you know.”
“We must see to the thing at once,” said Moreau. “I suppose if anything should turn up,
M’ling can take care of himself?”
“I’m not so sure of M’ling,” said Montgomery. “I think I ought to know him.”In the afternoon, Moreau, Montgomery, myself, and M’ling went across the island to the
huts in the ravine. We three were armed; M’ling carried the little hatchet he used in chopping
firewood, and some coils of wire. Moreau had a huge cowherd’s horn slung over his shoulder.
“You will see a gathering of the Beast People,” said Montgomery. “It is a pretty sight!”
Moreau said not a word on the way, but the expression of his heavy, white-fringed face
was grimly set.
We crossed the ravine down which smoked the stream of hot water, and followed the
winding pathway through the canebrakes until we reached a wide area covered over with a
thick, powdery yellow substance which I believe was sulphur. Above the shoulder of a weedy
bank the sea glittered. We came to a kind of shallow natural amphitheatre, and here the four
of us halted. Then Moreau sounded the horn, and broke the sleeping stillness of the tropical
afternoon. He must have had strong lungs. The hooting note rose and rose amidst its echoes,
to at last an ear-penetrating intensity.
“Ah!” said Moreau, letting the curved instrument fall to his side again.
Immediately there was a crashing through the yellow canes, and a sound of voices from
the dense green jungle that marked the morass through which I had run on the previous day.
Then at three or four points on the edge of the sulphurous area appeared the grotesque
forms of the Beast People hurrying towards us. I could not help a creeping horror, as I
perceived first one and then another trot out from the trees or reeds and come shambling
along over the hot dust. But Moreau and Montgomery stood calmly enough; and, perforce, I
stuck beside them.
First to arrive was the Satyr, strangely unreal for all that he cast a shadow and tossed
the dust with his hoofs. After him from the brake came a monstrous lout, a thing of horse and
rhinoceros, chewing a straw as it came; then appeared the Swine-woman and two
Wolfwomen; then the Fox-bear witch, with her red eyes in her peaked red face, and then others,
— all hurrying eagerly. As they came forward they began to cringe towards Moreau and
chant, quite regardless of one another, fragments of the latter half of the litany of the Law, —
“His is the Hand that wounds; His is the Hand that heals,” and so forth. As soon as they had
approached within a distance of perhaps thirty yards they halted, and bowing on knees and
elbows began flinging the white dust upon their heads.
Imagine the scene if you can! We three blue-clad men, with our misshapen black-faced
attendant, standing in a wide expanse of sunlit yellow dust under the blazing blue sky, and
surrounded by this circle of crouching and gesticulating monstrosities, — some almost human
save in their subtle expression and gestures, some like cripples, some so strangely distorted
as to resemble nothing but the denizens of our wildest dreams; and, beyond, the reedy lines
of a canebrake in one direction, a dense tangle of palm-trees on the other, separating us from
the ravine with the huts, and to the north the hazy horizon of the Pacific Ocean.
“Sixty-two, sixty-three,” counted Moreau. “There are four more.”
“I do not see the Leopard-man,” said I.
Presently Moreau sounded the great horn again, and at the sound of it all the Beast
People writhed and grovelled in the dust. Then, slinking out of the canebrake, stooping near
the ground and trying to join the dust-throwing circle behind Moreau’s back, came the
Leopard-man. The last of the Beast People to arrive was the little Ape-man. The earlier
animals, hot and weary with their grovelling, shot vicious glances at him.
“Cease!” said Moreau, in his firm, loud voice; and the Beast People sat back upon their
hams and rested from their worshipping.
“Where is the Sayer of the Law?” said Moreau, and the hairy-grey monster bowed his
face in the dust.
“Say the words!” said Moreau.
Forthwith all in the kneeling assembly, swaying from side to side and dashing up the
sulphur with their hands, — first the right hand and a puff of dust, and then the left, — beganonce more to chant their strange litany. When they reached, “Not to eat Flesh or Fowl, that is
the Law,” Moreau held up his lank white hand.
“Stop!” he cried, and there fell absolute silence upon them all.
I think they all knew and dreaded what was coming. I looked round at their strange faces.
When I saw their wincing attitudes and the furtive dread in their bright eyes, I wondered that I
had ever believed them to be men.
“That Law has been broken!” said Moreau.
“None escape,” from the faceless creature with the silvery hair. “None escape,” repeated
the kneeling circle of Beast People.
“Who is he?” cried Moreau, and looked round at their faces, cracking his whip. I fancied
the Hyena-swine looked dejected, so too did the Leopard-man. Moreau stopped, facing this
creature, who cringed towards him with the memory and dread of infinite torment.
“Who is he?” repeated Moreau, in a voice of thunder.
“Evil is he who breaks the Law,” chanted the Sayer of the Law.
Moreau looked into the eyes of the Leopard-man, and seemed to be dragging the very
soul out of the creature.
“Who breaks the Law —” said Moreau, taking his eyes off his victim, and turning towards
us (it seemed to me there was a touch of exultation in his voice).
“Goes back to the House of Pain,” they all clamoured, — “goes back to the House of
Pain, O Master!”
“Back to the House of Pain, — back to the House of Pain,” gabbled the Ape-man, as
though the idea was sweet to him.
“Do you hear?” said Moreau, turning back to the criminal, “my friend — Hullo!”
For the Leopard-man, released from Moreau’s eye, had risen straight from his knees,
and now, with eyes aflame and his huge feline tusks flashing out from under his curling lips,
leapt towards his tormentor. I am convinced that only the madness of unendurable fear could
have prompted this attack. The whole circle of threescore monsters seemed to rise about us.
I drew my revolver. The two figures collided. I saw Moreau reeling back from the
Leopardman’s blow. There was a furious yelling and howling all about us. Every one was moving
rapidly. For a moment I thought it was a general revolt. The furious face of the Leopard-man
flashed by mine, with M’ling close in pursuit. I saw the yellow eyes of the Hyena-swine blazing
with excitement, his attitude as if he were half resolved to attack me. The Satyr, too, glared at
me over the Hyena-swine’s hunched shoulders. I heard the crack of Moreau’s pistol, and saw
the pink flash dart across the tumult. The whole crowd seemed to swing round in the direction
of the glint of fire, and I too was swung round by the magnetism of the movement. In another
second I was running, one of a tumultuous shouting crowd, in pursuit of the escaping
That is all I can tell definitely. I saw the Leopard-man strike Moreau, and then everything
spun about me until I was running headlong. M’ling was ahead, close in pursuit of the fugitive.
Behind, their tongues already lolling out, ran the Wolf-women in great leaping strides. The
Swine folk followed, squealing with excitement, and the two Bull-men in their swathings of
white. Then came Moreau in a cluster of the Beast People, his wide-brimmed straw hat blown
off, his revolver in hand, and his lank white hair streaming out. The Hyena-swine ran beside
me, keeping pace with me and glancing furtively at me out of his feline eyes, and the others
came pattering and shouting behind us.
The Leopard-man went bursting his way through the long canes, which sprang back as
he passed, and rattled in M’ling’s face. We others in the rear found a trampled path for us
when we reached the brake. The chase lay through the brake for perhaps a quarter of a mile,
and then plunged into a dense thicket, which retarded our movements exceedingly, though we
went through it in a crowd together, — fronds flicking into our faces, ropy creepers catching
us under the chin or gripping our ankles, thorny plants hooking into and tearing cloth and fleshtogether.
“He has gone on all-fours through this,” panted Moreau, now just ahead of me.
“None escape,” said the Wolf-bear, laughing into my face with the exultation of hunting.
We burst out again among rocks, and saw the quarry ahead running lightly on all-fours and
snarling at us over his shoulder. At that the Wolf Folk howled with delight. The Thing was still
clothed, and at a distance its face still seemed human; but the carriage of its four limbs was
feline, and the furtive droop of its shoulder was distinctly that of a hunted animal. It leapt over
some thorny yellow-flowering bushes, and was hidden. M’ling was halfway across the space.
Most of us now had lost the first speed of the chase, and had fallen into a longer and
steadier stride. I saw as we traversed the open that the pursuit was now spreading from a
column into a line. The Hyena-swine still ran close to me, watching me as it ran, every now
and then puckering its muzzle with a snarling laugh. At the edge of the rocks the
Leopardman, realising that he was making for the projecting cape upon which he had stalked me on
the night of my arrival, had doubled in the undergrowth; but Montgomery had seen the
manoeuvre, and turned him again. So, panting, tumbling against rocks, torn by brambles,
impeded by ferns and reeds, I helped to pursue the Leopard-man who had broken the Law,
and the Hyena-swine ran, laughing savagely, by my side. I staggered on, my head reeling and
my heart beating against my ribs, tired almost to death, and yet not daring to lose sight of the
chase lest I should be left alone with this horrible companion. I staggered on in spite of infinite
fatigue and the dense heat of the tropical afternoon.
At last the fury of the hunt slackened. We had pinned the wretched brute into a corner of
the island. Moreau, whip in hand, marshalled us all into an irregular line, and we advanced
now slowly, shouting to one another as we advanced and tightening the cordon about our
victim. He lurked noiseless and invisible in the bushes through which I had run from him during
that midnight pursuit.
“Steady!” cried Moreau, “steady!” as the ends of the line crept round the tangle of
undergrowth and hemmed the brute in.
“Ware a rush!” came the voice of Montgomery from beyond the thicket.
I was on the slope above the bushes; Montgomery and Moreau beat along the beach
beneath. Slowly we pushed in among the fretted network of branches and leaves. The quarry
was silent.
“Back to the House of Pain, the House of Pain, the House of Pain!” yelped the voice of
the Ape-man, some twenty yards to the right.
When I heard that, I forgave the poor wretch all the fear he had inspired in me. I heard
the twigs snap and the boughs swish aside before the heavy tread of the Horse-rhinoceros
upon my right. Then suddenly through a polygon of green, in the half darkness under the
luxuriant growth, I saw the creature we were hunting. I halted. He was crouched together into
the smallest possible compass, his luminous green eyes turned over his shoulder regarding
It may seem a strange contradiction in me, — I cannot explain the fact, — but now,
seeing the creature there in a perfectly animal attitude, with the light gleaming in its eyes and
its imperfectly human face distorted with terror, I realised again the fact of its humanity. In
another moment other of its pursuers would see it, and it would be overpowered and
captured, to experience once more the horrible tortures of the enclosure. Abruptly I slipped
out my revolver, aimed between its terror-struck eyes, and fired. As I did so, the Hyena-swine
saw the Thing, and flung itself upon it with an eager cry, thrusting thirsty teeth into its neck. All
about me the green masses of the thicket were swaying and cracking as the Beast People
came rushing together. One face and then another appeared.
“Don’t kill it, Prendick!” cried Moreau. “Don’t kill it!” and I saw him stooping as he pushed
through under the fronds of the big ferns.
In another moment he had beaten off the Hyena-swine with the handle of his whip, andhe and Montgomery were keeping away the excited carnivorous Beast People, and
particularly M’ling, from the still quivering body. The hairy-grey Thing came sniffing at the
corpse under my arm. The other animals, in their animal ardour, jostled me to get a nearer
“Confound you, Prendick!” said Moreau. “I wanted him.”
“I’m sorry,” said I, though I was not. “It was the impulse of the moment.” I felt sick with
exertion and excitement. Turning, I pushed my way out of the crowding Beast People and
went on alone up the slope towards the higher part of the headland. Under the shouted
directions of Moreau I heard the three white-swathed Bull-men begin dragging the victim down
towards the water.
It was easy now for me to be alone. The Beast People manifested a quite human
curiosity about the dead body, and followed it in a thick knot, sniffing and growling at it as the
Bull-men dragged it down the beach. I went to the headland and watched the bull-men, black
against the evening sky as they carried the weighted dead body out to sea; and like a wave
across my mind came the realisation of the unspeakable aimlessness of things upon the
island. Upon the beach among the rocks beneath me were the Ape-man, the Hyena-swine,
and several other of the Beast People, standing about Montgomery and Moreau. They were
all still intensely excited, and all overflowing with noisy expressions of their loyalty to the Law;
yet I felt an absolute assurance in my own mind that the Hyena-swine was implicated in the
rabbit-killing. A strange persuasion came upon me, that, save for the grossness of the line,
the grotesqueness of the forms, I had here before me the whole balance of human life in
miniature, the whole interplay of instinct, reason, and fate in its simplest form. The
Leopardman had happened to go under: that was all the difference. Poor brute!
Poor brutes! I began to see the viler aspect of Moreau’s cruelty. I had not thought before
of the pain and trouble that came to these poor victims after they had passed from Moreau’s
hands. I had shivered only at the days of actual torment in the enclosure. But now that
seemed to me the lesser part. Before, they had been beasts, their instincts fitly adapted to
their surroundings, and happy as living things may be. Now they stumbled in the shackles of
humanity, lived in a fear that never died, fretted by a law they could not understand; their
mock-human existence, begun in an agony, was one long internal struggle, one long dread of
Moreau — and for what? It was the wantonness of it that stirred me.
Had Moreau had any intelligible object, I could have sympathised at least a little with him.
I am not so squeamish about pain as that. I could have forgiven him a little even, had his
motive been only hate. But he was so irresponsible, so utterly careless! His curiosity, his mad,
aimless investigations, drove him on; and the Things were thrown out to live a year or so, to
struggle and blunder and suffer, and at last to die painfully. They were wretched in
themselves; the old animal hate moved them to trouble one another; the Law held them back
from a brief hot struggle and a decisive end to their natural animosities.
In those days my fear of the Beast People went the way of my personal fear for Moreau.
I fell indeed into a morbid state, deep and enduring, and alien to fear, which has left
permanent scars upon my mind. I must confess that I lost faith in the sanity of the world when
I saw it suffering the painful disorder of this island. A blind Fate, a vast pitiless Mechanism,
seemed to cut and shape the fabric of existence and I, Moreau (by his passion for research),
Montgomery (by his passion for drink), the Beast People with their instincts and mental
restrictions, were torn and crushed, ruthlessly, inevitably, amid the infinite complexity of its
incessant wheels. But this condition did not come all at once: I think indeed that I anticipate a
little in speaking of it now.
Chapter 17 — A Catastrophe

Scarcely six weeks passed before I had lost every feeling but dislike and abhorrence for
this infamous experiment of Moreau’s. My one idea was to get away from these horrible
caricatures of my Maker’s image, back to the sweet and wholesome intercourse of men. My
fellow-creatures, from whom I was thus separated, began to assume idyllic virtue and beauty
in my memory. My first friendship with Montgomery did not increase. His long separation from
humanity, his secret vice of drunkenness, his evident sympathy with the Beast People, tainted
him to me. Several times I let him go alone among them. I avoided intercourse with them in
every possible way. I spent an increasing proportion of my time upon the beach, looking for
some liberating sail that never appeared, — until one day there fell upon us an appalling
disaster, which put an altogether different aspect upon my strange surroundings.
It was about seven or eight weeks after my landing, — rather more, I think, though I had
not troubled to keep account of the time, — when this catastrophe occurred. It happened in
the early morning — I should think about six. I had risen and breakfasted early, having been
aroused by the noise of three Beast Men carrying wood into the enclosure.
After breakfast I went to the open gateway of the enclosure, and stood there smoking a
cigarette and enjoying the freshness of the early morning. Moreau presently came round the
corner of the enclosure and greeted me. He passed by me, and I heard him behind me unlock
and enter his laboratory. So indurated was I at that time to the abomination of the place, that I
heard without a touch of emotion the puma victim begin another day of torture. It met its
persecutor with a shriek, almost exactly like that of an angry virago.
Then suddenly something happened, — I do not know what, to this day. I heard a short,
sharp cry behind me, a fall, and turning saw an awful face rushing upon me, — not human,
not animal, but hellish, brown, seamed with red branching scars, red drops starting out upon
it, and the lidless eyes ablaze. I threw up my arm to defend myself from the blow that flung
me headlong with a broken forearm; and the great monster, swathed in lint and with
redstained bandages fluttering about it, leapt over me and passed. I rolled over and over down
the beach, tried to sit up, and collapsed upon my broken arm. Then Moreau appeared, his
massive white face all the more terrible for the blood that trickled from his forehead. He
carried a revolver in one hand. He scarcely glanced at me, but rushed off at once in pursuit of
the puma.
I tried the other arm and sat up. The muffled figure in front ran in great striding leaps
along the beach, and Moreau followed her. She turned her head and saw him, then doubling
abruptly made for the bushes. She gained upon him at every stride. I saw her plunge into
them, and Moreau, running slantingly to intercept her, fired and missed as she disappeared.
Then he too vanished in the green confusion. I stared after them, and then the pain in my arm
flamed up, and with a groan I staggered to my feet. Montgomery appeared in the doorway,
dressed, and with his revolver in his hand.
“Great God, Prendick!” he said, not noticing that I was hurt, “that brute’s loose! Tore the
fetter out of the wall! Have you seen them?” Then sharply, seeing I gripped my arm, “What’s
the matter?”
“I was standing in the doorway,” said I.
He came forward and took my arm. “Blood on the sleeve,” said he, and rolled back the
flannel. He pocketed his weapon, felt my arm about painfully, and led me inside. “Your arm is
broken,” he said, and then, “Tell me exactly how it happened — what happened?”
I told him what I had seen; told him in broken sentences, with gasps of pain between
them, and very dexterously and swiftly he bound my arm meanwhile. He slung it from myshoulder, stood back and looked at me.
“You’ll do,” he said. “And now?”
He thought. Then he went out and locked the gates of the enclosure. He was absent
some time.
I was chiefly concerned about my arm. The incident seemed merely one more of many
horrible things. I sat down in the deck chair, and I must admit swore heartily at the island. The
first dull feeling of injury in my arm had already given way to a burning pain when Montgomery
reappeared. His face was rather pale, and he showed more of his lower gums than ever.
“I can neither see nor hear anything of him,” he said. “I’ve been thinking he may want my
help.” He stared at me with his expressionless eyes. “That was a strong brute,” he said. “It
simply wrenched its fetter out of the wall.” He went to the window, then to the door, and there
turned to me. “I shall go after him,” he said. “There’s another revolver I can leave with you. To
tell you the truth, I feel anxious somehow.”
He obtained the weapon, and put it ready to my hand on the table; then went out, leaving
a restless contagion in the air. I did not sit long after he left, but took the revolver in hand and
went to the doorway.
The morning was as still as death. Not a whisper of wind was stirring; the sea was like
polished glass, the sky empty, the beach desolate. In my half-excited, half-feverish state, this
stillness of things oppressed me. I tried to whistle, and the tune died away. I swore again, —
the second time that morning. Then I went to the corner of the enclosure and stared inland at
the green bush that had swallowed up Moreau and Montgomery. When would they return, and
how? Then far away up the beach a little grey Beast Man appeared, ran down to the water’s
edge and began splashing about. I strolled back to the doorway, then to the corner again, and
so began pacing to and fro like a sentinel upon duty. Once I was arrested by the distant voice
of Montgomery bawling, “Coo-ee — Moreau!” My arm became less painful, but very hot. I got
feverish and thirsty. My shadow grew shorter. I watched the distant figure until it went away
again. Would Moreau and Montgomery never return? Three sea-birds began fighting for some
stranded treasure.
Then from far away behind the enclosure I heard a pistol-shot. A long silence, and then
came another. Then a yelling cry nearer, and another dismal gap of silence. My unfortunate
imagination set to work to torment me. Then suddenly a shot close by. I went to the corner,
startled, and saw Montgomery, — his face scarlet, his hair disordered, and the knee of his
trousers torn. His face expressed profound consternation. Behind him slouched the Beast
Man, M’ling, and round M’ling’s jaws were some queer dark stains.
“Has he come?” said Montgomery.
“Moreau?” said I. “No.”
“My God!” The man was panting, almost sobbing. “Go back in,” he said, taking my arm.
“They’re mad. They’re all rushing about mad. What can have happened? I don’t know. I’ll tell
you, when my breath comes. Where’s some brandy?”
Montgomery limped before me into the room and sat down in the deck chair. M’ling flung
himself down just outside the doorway and began panting like a dog. I got Montgomery some
brandy-and-water. He sat staring in front of him at nothing, recovering his breath. After some
minutes he began to tell me what had happened.
He had followed their track for some way. It was plain enough at first on account of the
crushed and broken bushes, white rags torn from the puma’s bandages, and occasional
smears of blood on the leaves of the shrubs and undergrowth. He lost the track, however, on
the stony ground beyond the stream where I had seen the Beast Man drinking, and went
wandering aimlessly westward shouting Moreau’s name. Then M’ling had come to him
carrying a light hatchet. M’ling had seen nothing of the puma affair; had been felling wood,
and heard him calling. They went on shouting together. Two Beast Men came crouching and
peering at them through the undergrowth, with gestures and a furtive carriage that alarmedMontgomery by their strangeness. He hailed them, and they fled guiltily. He stopped shouting
after that, and after wandering some time farther in an undecided way, determined to visit the
He found the ravine deserted.
Growing more alarmed every minute, he began to retrace his steps. Then it was he
encountered the two Swine-men I had seen dancing on the night of my arrival; blood-stained
they were about the mouth, and intensely excited. They came crashing through the ferns, and
stopped with fierce faces when they saw him. He cracked his whip in some trepidation, and
forthwith they rushed at him. Never before had a Beast Man dared to do that. One he shot
through the head; M’ling flung himself upon the other, and the two rolled grappling. M’ling got
his brute under and with his teeth in its throat, and Montgomery shot that too as it struggled in
M’ling’s grip. He had some difficulty in inducing M’ling to come on with him. Thence they had
hurried back to me. On the way, M’ling had suddenly rushed into a thicket and driven out an
under-sized Ocelot-man, also blood-stained, and lame through a wound in the foot. This brute
had run a little way and then turned savagely at bay, and Montgomery — with a certain
wantonness, I thought — had shot him.
“What does it all mean?” said I.
He shook his head, and turned once more to the brandy.
Chapter 18 — The Finding of Moreau

When I saw Montgomery swallow a third dose of brandy, I took it upon myself to
interfere. He was already more than half fuddled. I told him that some serious thing must have
happened to Moreau by this time, or he would have returned before this, and that it behoved
us to ascertain what that catastrophe was. Montgomery raised some feeble objections, and at
last agreed. We had some food, and then all three of us started.
It is possibly due to the tension of my mind, at the time, but even now that start into the
hot stillness of the tropical afternoon is a singularly vivid impression. M’ling went first, his
shoulder hunched, his strange black head moving with quick starts as he peered first on this
side of the way and then on that. He was unarmed; his axe he had dropped when he
encountered the Swine-man. Teeth were his weapons, when it came to fighting. Montgomery
followed with stumbling footsteps, his hands in his pockets, his face downcast; he was in a
state of muddled sullenness with me on account of the brandy. My left arm was in a sling (it
was lucky it was my left), and I carried my revolver in my right. Soon we traced a narrow path
through the wild luxuriance of the island, going northwestward; and presently M’ling stopped,
and became rigid with watchfulness. Montgomery almost staggered into him, and then
stopped too. Then, listening intently, we heard coming through the trees the sound of voices
and footsteps approaching us.
“He is dead,” said a deep, vibrating voice.
“He is not dead; he is not dead,” jabbered another.
“We saw, we saw,” said several voices.
“Hullo!” suddenly shouted Montgomery, “Hullo, there!”
“Confound you!” said I, and gripped my pistol.
There was a silence, then a crashing among the interlacing vegetation, first here, then
there, and then half-a-dozen faces appeared, — strange faces, lit by a strange light. M’ling
made a growling noise in his throat. I recognised the Ape-man: I had indeed already identified
his voice, and two of the white-swathed brown-featured creatures I had seen in Montgomery’s
boat. With these were the two dappled brutes and that grey, horribly crooked creature who
said the Law, with grey hair streaming down its cheeks, heavy grey eyebrows, and grey locks
pouring off from a central parting upon its sloping forehead, — a heavy, faceless thing, with
strange red eyes, looking at us curiously from amidst the green.
For a space no one spoke. Then Montgomery hiccoughed, “Who — said he was dead?”
The Monkey-man looked guiltily at the hairy-grey Thing. “He is dead,” said this monster.
“They saw.”
There was nothing threatening about this detachment, at any rate. They seemed
awestricken and puzzled.
“Where is he?” said Montgomery.
“Beyond,” and the grey creature pointed.
“Is there a Law now?” asked the Monkey-man. “Is it still to be this and that? Is he dead
“Is there a Law?” repeated the man in white. “Is there a Law, thou Other with the Whip?”
“He is dead,” said the hairy-grey Thing. And they all stood watching us.
“Prendick,” said Montgomery, turning his dull eyes to me. “He’s dead, evidently.”
I had been standing behind him during this colloquy. I began to see how things lay with
them. I suddenly stepped in front of Montgomery and lifted up my voice:— “Children of the
Law,” I said, “he is not dead!” M’ling turned his sharp eyes on me. “He has changed his
shape; he has changed his body,” I went on. “For a time you will not see him. He is — there,”I pointed upward, “where he can watch you. You cannot see him, but he can see you. Fear
the Law!”
I looked at them squarely. They flinched.
“He is great, he is good,” said the Ape-man, peering fearfully upward among the dense
“And the other Thing?” I demanded.
“The Thing that bled, and ran screaming and sobbing, — that is dead too,” said the grey
Thing, still regarding me.
“That’s well,” grunted Montgomery.
“The Other with the Whip —” began the grey Thing.
“Well?” said I.
“Said he was dead.”
But Montgomery was still sober enough to understand my motive in denying Moreau’s
death. “He is not dead,” he said slowly, “not dead at all. No more dead than I am.”
“Some,” said I, “have broken the Law: they will die. Some have died. Show us now where
his old body lies, — the body he cast away because he had no more need of it.”
“It is this way, Man who walked in the Sea,” said the grey Thing.
And with these six creatures guiding us, we went through the tumult of ferns and
creepers and tree-stems towards the northwest. Then came a yelling, a crashing among the
branches, and a little pink homunculus rushed by us shrieking. Immediately after appeared a
monster in headlong pursuit, blood-bedabbled, who was amongst us almost before he could
stop his career. The grey Thing leapt aside. M’ling, with a snarl, flew at it, and was struck
aside. Montgomery fired and missed, bowed his head, threw up his arm, and turned to run. I
fired, and the Thing still came on; fired again, point-blank, into its ugly face. I saw its features
vanish in a flash: its face was driven in. Yet it passed me, gripped Montgomery, and holding
him, fell headlong beside him and pulled him sprawling upon itself in its death-agony.
I found myself alone with M’ling, the dead brute, and the prostrate man. Montgomery
raised himself slowly and stared in a muddled way at the shattered Beast Man beside him. It
more than half sobered him. He scrambled to his feet. Then I saw the grey Thing returning
cautiously through the trees.
“See,” said I, pointing to the dead brute, “is the Law not alive? This came of breaking the
He peered at the body. “He sends the Fire that kills,” said he, in his deep voice, repeating
part of the Ritual. The others gathered round and stared for a space.
At last we drew near the westward extremity of the island. We came upon the gnawed
and mutilated body of the puma, its shoulder-bone smashed by a bullet, and perhaps twenty
yards farther found at last what we sought. Moreau lay face downward in a trampled space in
a canebrake. One hand was almost severed at the wrist and his silvery hair was dabbled in
blood. His head had been battered in by the fetters of the puma. The broken canes beneath
him were smeared with blood. His revolver we could not find. Montgomery turned him over.
Resting at intervals, and with the help of the seven Beast People (for he was a heavy man),
we carried Moreau back to the enclosure. The night was darkling. Twice we heard unseen
creatures howling and shrieking past our little band, and once the little pink sloth-creature
appeared and stared at us, and vanished again. But we were not attacked again. At the gates
of the enclosure our company of Beast People left us, M’ling going with the rest. We locked
ourselves in, and then took Moreau’s mangled body into the yard and laid it upon a pile of
brushwood. Then we went into the laboratory and put an end to all we found living there.
Chapter 19 — Montgomery’s “Bank Holiday”

When this was accomplished, and we had washed and eaten, Montgomery and I went
into my little room and seriously discussed our position for the first time. It was then near
midnight. He was almost sober, but greatly disturbed in his mind. He had been strangely
under the influence of Moreau’s personality: I do not think it had ever occurred to him that
Moreau could die. This disaster was the sudden collapse of the habits that had become part
of his nature in the ten or more monotonous years he had spent on the island. He talked
vaguely, answered my questions crookedly, wandered into general questions.
“This silly ass of a world,” he said; “what a muddle it all is! I haven’t had any life. I wonder
when it’s going to begin. Sixteen years being bullied by nurses and schoolmasters at their own
sweet will; five in London grinding hard at medicine, bad food, shabby lodgings, shabby
clothes, shabby vice, a blunder, — I didn’t know any better, — and hustled off to this beastly
island. Ten years here! What’s it all for, Prendick? Are we bubbles blown by a baby?”
It was hard to deal with such ravings. “The thing we have to think of now,” said I, “is how
to get away from this island.”
“What’s the good of getting away? I’m an outcast. Where am I to join on? It’s all very well
for you, Prendick. Poor old Moreau! We can’t leave him here to have his bones picked. As it is
— And besides, what will become of the decent part of the Beast Folk?”
“Well,” said I, “that will do to-morrow. I’ve been thinking we might make that brushwood
into a pyre and burn his body — and those other things. Then what will happen with the Beast
“I don’t know. I suppose those that were made of beasts of prey will make silly asses of
themselves sooner or later. We can’t massacre the lot — can we? I suppose that’s what your
humanity would suggest? But they’ll change. They are sure to change.”
He talked thus inconclusively until at last I felt my temper going.
“Damnation!” he exclaimed at some petulance of mine; “can’t you see I’m in a worse hole
than you are?” And he got up, and went for the brandy. “Drink!” he said returning, “you
logicchopping, chalky-faced saint of an atheist, drink!”
“Not I,” said I, and sat grimly watching his face under the yellow paraffine flare, as he
drank himself into a garrulous misery.
I have a memory of infinite tedium. He wandered into a maudlin defence of the Beast
People and of M’ling. M’ling, he said, was the only thing that had ever really cared for him.
And suddenly an idea came to him.
“I’m damned!” said he, staggering to his feet and clutching the brandy bottle.
By some flash of intuition I knew what it was he intended. “You don’t give drink to that
beast!” I said, rising and facing him.
“Beast!” said he. “You’re the beast. He takes his liquor like a Christian. Come out of the
way, Prendick!”
“For God’s sake,” said I.
“Get — out of the way!” he roared, and suddenly whipped out his revolver.
“Very well,” said I, and stood aside, half-minded to fall upon him as he put his hand upon
the latch, but deterred by the thought of my useless arm. “You’ve made a beast of yourself,
— to the beasts you may go.”
He flung the doorway open, and stood half facing me between the yellow lamp-light and
the pallid glare of the moon; his eye-sockets were blotches of black under his stubbly
“You’re a solemn prig, Prendick, a silly ass! You’re always fearing and fancying. We’re onthe edge of things. I’m bound to cut my throat to-morrow. I’m going to have a damned Bank
Holiday to-night.” He turned and went out into the moonlight. “M’ling!” he cried; “M’ling, old
Three dim creatures in the silvery light came along the edge of the wan beach, — one a
white-wrapped creature, the other two blotches of blackness following it. They halted, staring.
Then I saw M’ling’s hunched shoulders as he came round the corner of the house.
“Drink!” cried Montgomery, “drink, you brutes! Drink and be men! Damme, I’m the
cleverest. Moreau forgot this; this is the last touch. Drink, I tell you!” And waving the bottle in
his hand he started off at a kind of quick trot to the westward, M’ling ranging himself between
him and the three dim creatures who followed.
I went to the doorway. They were already indistinct in the mist of the moonlight before
Montgomery halted. I saw him administer a dose of the raw brandy to M’ling, and saw the five
figures melt into one vague patch.
“Sing!” I heard Montgomery shout, — “sing all together, ‘Confound old Prendick!’ That’s
right; now again, ‘Confound old Prendick!’”
The black group broke up into five separate figures, and wound slowly away from me
along the band of shining beach. Each went howling at his own sweet will, yelping insults at
me, or giving whatever other vent this new inspiration of brandy demanded. Presently I heard
Montgomery’s voice shouting, “Right turn!” and they passed with their shouts and howls into
the blackness of the landward trees. Slowly, very slowly, they receded into silence.
The peaceful splendour of the night healed again. The moon was now past the meridian
and travelling down the west. It was at its full, and very bright riding through the empty blue
sky. The shadow of the wall lay, a yard wide and of inky blackness, at my feet. The eastward
sea was a featureless grey, dark and mysterious; and between the sea and the shadow the
grey sands (of volcanic glass and crystals) flashed and shone like a beach of diamonds.
Behind me the paraffine lamp flared hot and ruddy.
Then I shut the door, locked it, and went into the enclosure where Moreau lay beside his
latest victims, — the staghounds and the llama and some other wretched brutes, — with his
massive face calm even after his terrible death, and with the hard eyes open, staring at the
dead white moon above. I sat down upon the edge of the sink, and with my eyes upon that
ghastly pile of silvery light and ominous shadows began to turn over my plans. In the morning
I would gather some provisions in the dingey, and after setting fire to the pyre before me,
push out into the desolation of the high sea once more. I felt that for Montgomery there was
no help; that he was, in truth, half akin to these Beast Folk, unfitted for human kindred.
I do not know how long I sat there scheming. It must have been an hour or so. Then my
planning was interrupted by the return of Montgomery to my neighbourhood. I heard a yelling
from many throats, a tumult of exultant cries passing down towards the beach, whooping and
howling, and excited shrieks that seemed to come to a stop near the water’s edge. The riot
rose and fell; I heard heavy blows and the splintering smash of wood, but it did not trouble me
then. A discordant chanting began.
My thoughts went back to my means of escape. I got up, brought the lamp, and went
into a shed to look at some kegs I had seen there. Then I became interested in the contents
of some biscuit-tins, and opened one. I saw something out of the tail of my eye, — a red
figure, — and turned sharply.
Behind me lay the yard, vividly black-and-white in the moonlight, and the pile of wood and
faggots on which Moreau and his mutilated victims lay, one over another. They seemed to be
gripping one another in one last revengeful grapple. His wounds gaped, black as night, and
the blood that had dripped lay in black patches upon the sand. Then I saw, without
understanding, the cause of my phantom, — a ruddy glow that came and danced and went
upon the wall opposite. I misinterpreted this, fancied it was a reflection of my flickering lamp,
and turned again to the stores in the shed. I went on rummaging among them, as well as aone-armed man could, finding this convenient thing and that, and putting them aside for
tomorrow’s launch. My movements were slow, and the time passed quickly. Insensibly the
daylight crept upon me.
The chanting died down, giving place to a clamour; then it began again, and suddenly
broke into a tumult. I heard cries of, “More! more!” a sound like quarrelling, and a sudden wild
shriek. The quality of the sounds changed so greatly that it arrested my attention. I went out
into the yard and listened. Then cutting like a knife across the confusion came the crack of a
I rushed at once through my room to the little doorway. As I did so I heard some of the
packing-cases behind me go sliding down and smash together with a clatter of glass on the
floor of the shed. But I did not heed these. I flung the door open and looked out.
Up the beach by the boathouse a bonfire was burning, raining up sparks into the
indistinctness of the dawn. Around this struggled a mass of black figures. I heard Montgomery
call my name. I began to run at once towards this fire, revolver in hand. I saw the pink tongue
of Montgomery’s pistol lick out once, close to the ground. He was down. I shouted with all my
strength and fired into the air. I heard some one cry, “The Master!” The knotted black struggle
broke into scattering units, the fire leapt and sank down. The crowd of Beast People fled in
sudden panic before me, up the beach. In my excitement I fired at their retreating backs as
they disappeared among the bushes. Then I turned to the black heaps upon the ground.
Montgomery lay on his back, with the hairy-grey Beast-man sprawling across his body.
The brute was dead, but still gripping Montgomery’s throat with its curving claws. Near by lay
M’ling on his face and quite still, his neck bitten open and the upper part of the smashed
brandy-bottle in his hand. Two other figures lay near the fire, — the one motionless, the other
groaning fitfully, every now and then raising its head slowly, then dropping it again.
I caught hold of the grey man and pulled him off Montgomery’s body; his claws drew
down the torn coat reluctantly as I dragged him away. Montgomery was dark in the face and
scarcely breathing. I splashed sea-water on his face and pillowed his head on my rolled-up
coat. M’ling was dead. The wounded creature by the fire — it was a Wolf-brute with a bearded
grey face — lay, I found, with the fore part of its body upon the still glowing timber. The
wretched thing was injured so dreadfully that in mercy I blew its brains out at once. The other
brute was one of the Bull-men swathed in white. He too was dead. The rest of the Beast
People had vanished from the beach.
I went to Montgomery again and knelt beside him, cursing my ignorance of medicine.
The fire beside me had sunk down, and only charred beams of timber glowing at the central
ends and mixed with a grey ash of brushwood remained. I wondered casually where
Montgomery had got his wood. Then I saw that the dawn was upon us. The sky had grown
brighter, the setting moon was becoming pale and opaque in the luminous blue of the day.
The sky to the eastward was rimmed with red.
Suddenly I heard a thud and a hissing behind me, and, looking round, sprang to my feet
with a cry of horror. Against the warm dawn great tumultuous masses of black smoke were
boiling up out of the enclosure, and through their stormy darkness shot flickering threads of
blood-red flame. Then the thatched roof caught. I saw the curving charge of the flames across
the sloping straw. A spurt of fire jetted from the window of my room.
I knew at once what had happened. I remembered the crash I had heard. When I had
rushed out to Montgomery’s assistance, I had overturned the lamp.
The hopelessness of saving any of the contents of the enclosure stared me in the face.
My mind came back to my plan of flight, and turning swiftly I looked to see where the two
boats lay upon the beach. They were gone! Two axes lay upon the sands beside me; chips
and splinters were scattered broadcast, and the ashes of the bonfire were blackening and
smoking under the dawn. Montgomery had burnt the boats to revenge himself upon me and
prevent our return to mankind!A sudden convulsion of rage shook me. I was almost moved to batter his foolish head in,
as he lay there helpless at my feet. Then suddenly his hand moved, so feebly, so pitifully, that
my wrath vanished. He groaned, and opened his eyes for a minute. I knelt down beside him
and raised his head. He opened his eyes again, staring silently at the dawn, and then they
met mine. The lids fell.
“Sorry,” he said presently, with an effort. He seemed trying to think. “The last,” he
murmured, “the last of this silly universe. What a mess —”
I listened. His head fell helplessly to one side. I thought some drink might revive him; but
there was neither drink nor vessel in which to bring drink at hand. He seemed suddenly
heavier. My heart went cold. I bent down to his face, put my hand through the rent in his
blouse. He was dead; and even as he died a line of white heat, the limb of the sun, rose
eastward beyond the projection of the bay, splashing its radiance across the sky and turning
the dark sea into a weltering tumult of dazzling light. It fell like a glory upon his death-shrunken
I let his head fall gently upon the rough pillow I had made for him, and stood up. Before
me was the glittering desolation of the sea, the awful solitude upon which I had already
suffered so much; behind me the island, hushed under the dawn, its Beast People silent and
unseen. The enclosure, with all its provisions and ammunition, burnt noisily, with sudden gusts
of flame, a fitful crackling, and now and then a crash. The heavy smoke drove up the beach
away from me, rolling low over the distant tree-tops towards the huts in the ravine. Beside me
were the charred vestiges of the boats and these four dead bodies.
Then out of the bushes came three Beast People, with hunched shoulders, protruding
heads, misshapen hands awkwardly held, and inquisitive, unfriendly eyes and advanced
towards me with hesitating gestures.
Chapter 20 — Alone with the Beast Folk

I faced these people, facing my fate in them, single-handed now, — literally
singlehanded, for I had a broken arm. In my pocket was a revolver with two empty chambers.
Among the chips scattered about the beach lay the two axes that had been used to chop up
the boats. The tide was creeping in behind me. There was nothing for it but courage. I looked
squarely into the faces of the advancing monsters. They avoided my eyes, and their quivering
nostrils investigated the bodies that lay beyond me on the beach. I took half-a-dozen steps,
picked up the blood-stained whip that lay beneath the body of the Wolf-man, and cracked it.
They stopped and stared at me.
“Salute!” said I. “Bow down!”
They hesitated. One bent his knees. I repeated my command, with my heart in my
mouth, and advanced upon them. One knelt, then the other two.
I turned and walked towards the dead bodies, keeping my face towards the three
kneeling Beast Men, very much as an actor passing up the stage faces the audience.
“They broke the Law,” said I, putting my foot on the Sayer of the Law. “They have been
slain, — even the Sayer of the Law; even the Other with the Whip. Great is the Law! Come
and see.”
“None escape,” said one of them, advancing and peering.
“None escape,” said I. “Therefore hear and do as I command.” They stood up, looking
questioningly at one another.
“Stand there,” said I.
I picked up the hatchets and swung them by their heads from the sling of my arm; turned
Montgomery over; picked up his revolver still loaded in two chambers, and bending down to
rummage, found half-a-dozen cartridges in his pocket.
“Take him,” said I, standing up again and pointing with the whip; “take him, and carry him
out and cast him into the sea.”
They came forward, evidently still afraid of Montgomery, but still more afraid of my
cracking red whip-lash; and after some fumbling and hesitation, some whip-cracking and
shouting, they lifted him gingerly, carried him down to the beach, and went splashing into the
dazzling welter of the sea.
“On!” said I, “on! Carry him far.”
They went in up to their armpits and stood regarding me.
“Let go,” said I; and the body of Montgomery vanished with a splash. Something seemed
to tighten across my chest.
“Good!” said I, with a break in my voice; and they came back, hurrying and fearful, to the
margin of the water, leaving long wakes of black in the silver. At the water’s edge they
stopped, turning and glaring into the sea as though they presently expected Montgomery to
arise therefrom and exact vengeance.
“Now these,” said I, pointing to the other bodies.
They took care not to approach the place where they had thrown Montgomery into the
water, but instead, carried the four dead Beast People slantingly along the beach for perhaps
a hundred yards before they waded out and cast them away.
As I watched them disposing of the mangled remains of M’ling, I heard a light footfall
behind me, and turning quickly saw the big Hyena-swine perhaps a dozen yards away. His
head was bent down, his bright eyes were fixed upon me, his stumpy hands clenched and
held close by his side. He stopped in this crouching attitude when I turned, his eyes a little
averted.For a moment we stood eye to eye. I dropped the whip and snatched at the pistol in my
pocket; for I meant to kill this brute, the most formidable of any left now upon the island, at
the first excuse. It may seem treacherous, but so I was resolved. I was far more afraid of him
than of any other two of the Beast Folk. His continued life was I knew a threat against mine.
I was perhaps a dozen seconds collecting myself. Then cried I, “Salute! Bow down!”
His teeth flashed upon me in a snarl. “Who are you that I should —”
Perhaps a little too spasmodically I drew my revolver, aimed quickly and fired. I heard
him yelp, saw him run sideways and turn, knew I had missed, and clicked back the cock with
my thumb for the next shot. But he was already running headlong, jumping from side to side,
and I dared not risk another miss. Every now and then he looked back at me over his
shoulder. He went slanting along the beach, and vanished beneath the driving masses of
dense smoke that were still pouring out from the burning enclosure. For some time I stood
staring after him. I turned to my three obedient Beast Folk again and signalled them to drop
the body they still carried. Then I went back to the place by the fire where the bodies had
fallen and kicked the sand until all the brown blood-stains were absorbed and hidden.
I dismissed my three serfs with a wave of the hand, and went up the beach into the
thickets. I carried my pistol in my hand, my whip thrust with the hatchets in the sling of my
arm. I was anxious to be alone, to think out the position in which I was now placed. A dreadful
thing that I was only beginning to realise was, that over all this island there was now no safe
place where I could be alone and secure to rest or sleep. I had recovered strength amazingly
since my landing, but I was still inclined to be nervous and to break down under any great
stress. I felt that I ought to cross the island and establish myself with the Beast People, and
make myself secure in their confidence. But my heart failed me. I went back to the beach, and
turning eastward past the burning enclosure, made for a point where a shallow spit of coral
sand ran out towards the reef. Here I could sit down and think, my back to the sea and my
face against any surprise. And there I sat, chin on knees, the sun beating down upon my head
and unspeakable dread in my mind, plotting how I could live on against the hour of my rescue
(if ever rescue came). I tried to review the whole situation as calmly as I could, but it was
difficult to clear the thing of emotion.
I began turning over in my mind the reason of Montgomery’s despair. “They will change,”
he said; “they are sure to change.” And Moreau, what was it that Moreau had said? “The
stubborn beast-flesh grows day by day back again.” Then I came round to the Hyena-swine. I
felt sure that if I did not kill that brute, he would kill me. The Sayer of the Law was dead:
worse luck. They knew now that we of the Whips could be killed even as they themselves
were killed. Were they peering at me already out of the green masses of ferns and palms over
yonder, watching until I came within their spring? Were they plotting against me? What was
the Hyena-swine telling them? My imagination was running away with me into a morass of
unsubstantial fears.
My thoughts were disturbed by a crying of sea-birds hurrying towards some black object
that had been stranded by the waves on the beach near the enclosure. I knew what that
object was, but I had not the heart to go back and drive them off. I began walking along the
beach in the opposite direction, designing to come round the eastward corner of the island
and so approach the ravine of the huts, without traversing the possible ambuscades of the
Perhaps half a mile along the beach I became aware of one of my three Beast Folk
advancing out of the landward bushes towards me. I was now so nervous with my own
imaginings that I immediately drew my revolver. Even the propitiatory gestures of the creature
failed to disarm me. He hesitated as he approached.
“Go away!” cried I.
There was something very suggestive of a dog in the cringing attitude of the creature. It
retreated a little way, very like a dog being sent home, and stopped, looking at me imploringlywith canine brown eyes.
“Go away,” said I. “Do not come near me.”
“May I not come near you?” it said.
“No; go away,” I insisted, and snapped my whip. Then putting my whip in my teeth, I
stooped for a stone, and with that threat drove the creature away.
So in solitude I came round by the ravine of the Beast People, and hiding among the
weeds and reeds that separated this crevice from the sea I watched such of them as
appeared, trying to judge from their gestures and appearance how the death of Moreau and
Montgomery and the destruction of the House of Pain had affected them. I know now the folly
of my cowardice. Had I kept my courage up to the level of the dawn, had I not allowed it to
ebb away in solitary thought, I might have grasped the vacant sceptre of Moreau and ruled
over the Beast People. As it was I lost the opportunity, and sank to the position of a mere
leader among my fellows.
Towards noon certain of them came and squatted basking in the hot sand. The
imperious voices of hunger and thirst prevailed over my dread. I came out of the bushes, and,
revolver in hand, walked down towards these seated figures. One, a Wolf-woman, turned her
head and stared at me, and then the others. None attempted to rise or salute me. I felt too
faint and weary to insist, and I let the moment pass.
“I want food,” said I, almost apologetically, and drawing near.
“There is food in the huts,” said an Ox-boar-man, drowsily, and looking away from me.
I passed them, and went down into the shadow and odours of the almost deserted
ravine. In an empty hut I feasted on some specked and half-decayed fruit; and then after I
had propped some branches and sticks about the opening, and placed myself with my face
towards it and my hand upon my revolver, the exhaustion of the last thirty hours claimed its
own, and I fell into a light slumber, hoping that the flimsy barricade I had erected would cause
sufficient noise in its removal to save me from surprise.
Chapter 21 — The Reversion of the Beast Folk

In this way I became one among the Beast People in the Island of Doctor Moreau. When
I awoke, it was dark about me. My arm ached in its bandages. I sat up, wondering at first
where I might be. I heard coarse voices talking outside. Then I saw that my barricade had
gone, and that the opening of the hut stood clear. My revolver was still in my hand.
I heard something breathing, saw something crouched together close beside me. I held
my breath, trying to see what it was. It began to move slowly, interminably. Then something
soft and warm and moist passed across my hand. All my muscles contracted. I snatched my
hand away. A cry of alarm began and was stifled in my throat. Then I just realised what had
happened sufficiently to stay my fingers on the revolver.
“Who is that?” I said in a hoarse whisper, the revolver still pointed.
“I— Master.”
“Who are you?”
“They say there is no Master now. But I know, I know. I carried the bodies into the sea,
O Walker in the Sea! the bodies of those you slew. I am your slave, Master.”
“Are you the one I met on the beach?” I asked.
“The same, Master.”
The Thing was evidently faithful enough, for it might have fallen upon me as I slept. “It is
well,” I said, extending my hand for another licking kiss. I began to realise what its presence
meant, and the tide of my courage flowed. “Where are the others?” I asked.
“They are mad; they are fools,” said the Dog-man. “Even now they talk together beyond
there. They say, ‘The Master is dead. The Other with the Whip is dead. That Other who
walked in the Sea is as we are. We have no Master, no Whips, no House of Pain, any more.
There is an end. We love the Law, and will keep it; but there is no Pain, no Master, no Whips
for ever again.’ So they say. But I know, Master, I know.”
I felt in the darkness, and patted the Dog-man’s head. “It is well,” I said again.
“Presently you will slay them all,” said the Dog-man.
“Presently,” I answered, “I will slay them all, — after certain days and certain things have
come to pass. Every one of them save those you spare, every one of them shall be slain.”
“What the Master wishes to kill, the Master kills,” said the Dog-man with a certain
satisfaction in his voice.
“And that their sins may grow,” I said, “let them live in their folly until their time is ripe. Let
them not know that I am the Master.”
“The Master’s will is sweet,” said the Dog-man, with the ready tact of his canine blood.
“But one has sinned,” said I. “Him I will kill, whenever I may meet him. When I say to
you, ‘That is he,’ see that you fall upon him. And now I will go to the men and women who are
assembled together.”
For a moment the opening of the hut was blackened by the exit of the Dog-man. Then I
followed and stood up, almost in the exact spot where I had been when I had heard Moreau
and his staghound pursuing me. But now it was night, and all the miasmatic ravine about me
was black; and beyond, instead of a green, sunlit slope, I saw a red fire, before which
hunched, grotesque figures moved to and fro. Farther were the thick trees, a bank of
darkness, fringed above with the black lace of the upper branches. The moon was just riding
up on the edge of the ravine, and like a bar across its face drove the spire of vapour that was
for ever streaming from the fumaroles of the island.
“Walk by me,” said I, nerving myself; and side by side we walked down the narrow way,
taking little heed of the dim Things that peered at us out of the huts.None about the fire attempted to salute me. Most of them disregarded me,
ostentatiously. I looked round for the Hyena-swine, but he was not there. Altogether, perhaps
twenty of the Beast Folk squatted, staring into the fire or talking to one another.
“He is dead, he is dead! the Master is dead!” said the voice of the Ape-man to the right
of me. “The House of Pain — there is no House of Pain!”
“He is not dead,” said I, in a loud voice. “Even now he watches us!”
This startled them. Twenty pairs of eyes regarded me.
“The House of Pain is gone,” said I. “It will come again. The Master you cannot see; yet
even now he listens among you.”
“True, true!” said the Dog-man.
They were staggered at my assurance. An animal may be ferocious and cunning
enough, but it takes a real man to tell a lie.
“The Man with the Bandaged Arm speaks a strange thing,” said one of the Beast Folk.
“I tell you it is so,” I said. “The Master and the House of Pain will come again. Woe be to
him who breaks the Law!”
They looked curiously at one another. With an affectation of indifference I began to chop
idly at the ground in front of me with my hatchet. They looked, I noticed, at the deep cuts I
made in the turf.
Then the Satyr raised a doubt. I answered him. Then one of the dappled things objected,
and an animated discussion sprang up round the fire. Every moment I began to feel more
convinced of my present security. I talked now without the catching in my breath, due to the
intensity of my excitement, that had troubled me at first. In the course of about an hour I had
really convinced several of the Beast Folk of the truth of my assertions, and talked most of the
others into a dubious state. I kept a sharp eye for my enemy the Hyena-swine, but he never
appeared. Every now and then a suspicious movement would startle me, but my confidence
grew rapidly. Then as the moon crept down from the zenith, one by one the listeners began to
yawn (showing the oddest teeth in the light of the sinking fire), and first one and then another
retired towards the dens in the ravine; and I, dreading the silence and darkness, went with
them, knowing I was safer with several of them than with one alone.
In this manner began the longer part of my sojourn upon this Island of Doctor Moreau.
But from that night until the end came, there was but one thing happened to tell save a series
of innumerable small unpleasant details and the fretting of an incessant uneasiness. So that I
prefer to make no chronicle for that gap of time, to tell only one cardinal incident of the ten
months I spent as an intimate of these half-humanised brutes. There is much that sticks in my
memory that I could write, — things that I would cheerfully give my right hand to forget; but
they do not help the telling of the story.
In the retrospect it is strange to remember how soon I fell in with these monsters’ ways,
and gained my confidence again. I had my quarrels with them of course, and could show
some of their teeth-marks still; but they soon gained a wholesome respect for my trick of
throwing stones and for the bite of my hatchet. And my Saint-Bernard-man’s loyalty was of
infinite service to me. I found their simple scale of honour was based mainly on the capacity
for inflicting trenchant wounds. Indeed, I may say — without vanity, I hope — that I held
something like pre-eminence among them. One or two, whom in a rare access of high spirits I
had scarred rather badly, bore me a grudge; but it vented itself chiefly behind my back, and at
a safe distance from my missiles, in grimaces.
The Hyena-swine avoided me, and I was always on the alert for him. My inseparable
Dog-man hated and dreaded him intensely. I really believe that was at the root of the brute’s
attachment to me. It was soon evident to me that the former monster had tasted blood, and
gone the way of the Leopard-man. He formed a lair somewhere in the forest, and became
solitary. Once I tried to induce the Beast Folk to hunt him, but I lacked the authority to make
them co-operate for one end. Again and again I tried to approach his den and come upon himunaware; but always he was too acute for me, and saw or winded me and got away. He too
made every forest pathway dangerous to me and my ally with his lurking ambuscades. The
Dog-man scarcely dared to leave my side.
In the first month or so the Beast Folk, compared with their latter condition, were human
enough, and for one or two besides my canine friend I even conceived a friendly tolerance.
The little pink sloth-creature displayed an odd affection for me, and took to following me
about. The Monkey-man bored me, however; he assumed, on the strength of his five digits,
that he was my equal, and was for ever jabbering at me, — jabbering the most arrant
nonsense. One thing about him entertained me a little: he had a fantastic trick of coining new
words. He had an idea, I believe, that to gabble about names that meant nothing was the
proper use of speech. He called it “Big Thinks” to distinguish it from “Little Thinks,” the sane
every-day interests of life. If ever I made a remark he did not understand, he would praise it
very much, ask me to say it again, learn it by heart, and go off repeating it, with a word wrong
here or there, to all the milder of the Beast People. He thought nothing of what was plain and
comprehensible. I invented some very curious “Big Thinks” for his especial use. I think now
that he was the silliest creature I ever met; he had developed in the most wonderful way the
distinctive silliness of man without losing one jot of the natural folly of a monkey.
This, I say, was in the earlier weeks of my solitude among these brutes. During that time
they respected the usage established by the Law, and behaved with general decorum. Once I
found another rabbit torn to pieces, — by the Hyena-swine, I am assured, — but that was all.
It was about May when I first distinctly perceived a growing difference in their speech and
carriage, a growing coarseness of articulation, a growing disinclination to talk. My
Monkeyman’s jabber multiplied in volume but grew less and less comprehensible, more and more
simian. Some of the others seemed altogether slipping their hold upon speech, though they
still understood what I said to them at that time. (Can you imagine language, once clear-cut
and exact, softening and guttering, losing shape and import, becoming mere limps of sound
again?) And they walked erect with an increasing difficulty. Though they evidently felt
ashamed of themselves, every now and then I would come upon one or another running on
toes and finger-tips, and quite unable to recover the vertical attitude. They held things more
clumsily; drinking by suction, feeding by gnawing, grew commoner every day. I realised more
keenly than ever what Moreau had told me about the “stubborn beast-flesh.” They were
reverting, and reverting very rapidly.
Some of them — the pioneers in this, I noticed with some surprise, were all females —
began to disregard the injunction of decency, deliberately for the most part. Others even
attempted public outrages upon the institution of monogamy. The tradition of the Law was
clearly losing its force. I cannot pursue this disagreeable subject.
My Dog-man imperceptibly slipped back to the dog again; day by day he became dumb,
quadrupedal, hairy. I scarcely noticed the transition from the companion on my right hand to
the lurching dog at my side.
As the carelessness and disorganisation increased from day to day, the lane of dwelling
places, at no time very sweet, became so loathsome that I left it, and going across the island
made myself a hovel of boughs amid the black ruins of Moreau’s enclosure. Some memory of
pain, I found, still made that place the safest from the Beast Folk.
It would be impossible to detail every step of the lapsing of these monsters, — to tell
how, day by day, the human semblance left them; how they gave up bandagings and
wrappings, abandoned at last every stitch of clothing; how the hair began to spread over the
exposed limbs; how their foreheads fell away and their faces projected; how the quasi-human
intimacy I had permitted myself with some of them in the first month of my loneliness became
a shuddering horror to recall.
The change was slow and inevitable. For them and for me it came without any definite
shock. I still went among them in safety, because no jolt in the downward glide had releasedthe increasing charge of explosive animalism that ousted the human day by day. But I began
to fear that soon now that shock must come. My Saint-Bernard-brute followed me to the
enclosure every night, and his vigilance enabled me to sleep at times in something like peace.
The little pink sloth-thing became shy and left me, to crawl back to its natural life once more
among the tree-branches. We were in just the state of equilibrium that would remain in one of
those “Happy Family” cages which animal-tamers exhibit, if the tamer were to leave it for ever.
Of course these creatures did not decline into such beasts as the reader has seen in
zoological gardens, — into ordinary bears, wolves, tigers, oxen, swine, and apes. There was
still something strange about each; in each Moreau had blended this animal with that. One
perhaps was ursine chiefly, another feline chiefly, another bovine chiefly; but each was tainted
with other creatures, — a kind of generalised animalism appearing through the specific
dispositions. And the dwindling shreds of the humanity still startled me every now and then, —
a momentary recrudescence of speech perhaps, an unexpected dexterity of the fore-feet, a
pitiful attempt to walk erect.
I too must have undergone strange changes. My clothes hung about me as yellow rags,
through whose rents showed the tanned skin. My hair grew long, and became matted
together. I am told that even now my eyes have a strange brightness, a swift alertness of
At first I spent the daylight hours on the southward beach watching for a ship, hoping and
praying for a ship. I counted on the “Ipecacuanha” returning as the year wore on; but she
never came. Five times I saw sails, and thrice smoke; but nothing ever touched the island. I
always had a bonfire ready, but no doubt the volcanic reputation of the island was taken to
account for that.
It was only about September or October that I began to think of making a raft. By that
time my arm had healed, and both my hands were at my service again. At first, I found my
helplessness appalling. I had never done any carpentry or such-like work in my life, and I
spent day after day in experimental chopping and binding among the trees. I had no ropes,
and could hit on nothing wherewith to make ropes; none of the abundant creepers seemed
limber or strong enough, and with all my litter of scientific education I could not devise any
way of making them so. I spent more than a fortnight grubbing among the black ruins of the
enclosure and on the beach where the boats had been burnt, looking for nails and other stray
pieces of metal that might prove of service. Now and then some Beast-creature would watch
me, and go leaping off when I called to it. There came a season of thunder-storms and heavy
rain, which greatly retarded my work; but at last the raft was completed.
I was delighted with it. But with a certain lack of practical sense which has always been
my bane, I had made it a mile or more from the sea; and before I had dragged it down to the
beach the thing had fallen to pieces. Perhaps it is as well that I was saved from launching it;
but at the time my misery at my failure was so acute that for some days I simply moped on
the beach, and stared at the water and thought of death.
I did not, however, mean to die, and an incident occurred that warned me unmistakably
of the folly of letting the days pass so, — for each fresh day was fraught with increasing
danger from the Beast People.
I was lying in the shade of the enclosure wall, staring out to sea, when I was startled by
something cold touching the skin of my heel, and starting round found the little pink
slothcreature blinking into my face. He had long since lost speech and active movement, and the
lank hair of the little brute grew thicker every day and his stumpy claws more askew. He made
a moaning noise when he was he had attracted my attention, went a little way towards the
bushes and looked back at me.
At first I did not understand, but presently it occurred to me that he wished me to follow
him; and this I did at last, — slowly, for the day was hot. When we reached the trees he
clambered into them, for he could travel better among their swinging creepers than on theground. And suddenly in a trampled space I came upon a ghastly group. My
Saint-Bernardcreature lay on the ground, dead; and near his body crouched the Hyena-swine, gripping the
quivering flesh with its misshapen claws, gnawing at it, and snarling with delight. As I
approached, the monster lifted its glaring eyes to mine, its lips went trembling back from its
red-stained teeth, and it growled menacingly. It was not afraid and not ashamed; the last
vestige of the human taint had vanished. I advanced a step farther, stopped, and pulled out
my revolver. At last I had him face to face.
The brute made no sign of retreat; but its ears went back, its hair bristled, and its body
crouched together. I aimed between the eyes and fired. As I did so, the Thing rose straight at
me in a leap, and I was knocked over like a ninepin. It clutched at me with its crippled hand,
and struck me in the face. Its spring carried it over me. I fell under the hind part of its body;
but luckily I had hit as I meant, and it had died even as it leapt. I crawled out from under its
unclean weight and stood up trembling, staring at its quivering body. That danger at least was
over; but this, I knew was only the first of the series of relapses that must come.
I burnt both of the bodies on a pyre of brushwood; but after that I saw that unless I left
the island my death was only a question of time. The Beast People by that time had, with one
or two exceptions, left the ravine and made themselves lairs according to their taste among
the thickets of the island. Few prowled by day, most of them slept, and the island might have
seemed deserted to a new-comer; but at night the air was hideous with their calls and
howling. I had half a mind to make a massacre of them; to build traps, or fight them with my
knife. Had I possessed sufficient cartridges, I should not have hesitated to begin the killing.
There could now be scarcely a score left of the dangerous carnivores; the braver of these
were already dead. After the death of this poor dog of mine, my last friend, I too adopted to
some extent the practice of slumbering in the daytime in order to be on my guard at night. I
rebuilt my den in the walls of the enclosure, with such a narrow opening that anything
attempting to enter must necessarily make a considerable noise. The creatures had lost the
art of fire too, and recovered their fear of it. I turned once more, almost passionately now, to
hammering together stakes and branches to form a raft for my escape.
I found a thousand difficulties. I am an extremely unhandy man (my schooling was over
before the days of Slojd); but most of the requirements of a raft I met at last in some clumsy,
circuitous way or other, and this time I took care of the strength. The only insurmountable
obstacle was that I had no vessel to contain the water I should need if I floated forth upon
these untravelled seas. I would have even tried pottery, but the island contained no clay. I
used to go moping about the island trying with all my might to solve this one last difficulty.
Sometimes I would give way to wild outbursts of rage, and hack and splinter some unlucky
tree in my intolerable vexation. But I could think of nothing.
And then came a day, a wonderful day, which I spent in ecstasy. I saw a sail to the
southwest, a small sail like that of a little schooner; and forthwith I lit a great pile of
brushwood, and stood by it in the heat of it, and the heat of the midday sun, watching. All day
I watched that sail, eating or drinking nothing, so that my head reeled; and the Beasts came
and glared at me, and seemed to wonder, and went away. It was still distant when night came
and swallowed it up; and all night I toiled to keep my blaze bright and high, and the eyes of the
Beasts shone out of the darkness, marvelling. In the dawn the sail was nearer, and I saw it
was the dirty lug-sail of a small boat. But it sailed strangely. My eyes were weary with
watching, and I peered and could not believe them. Two men were in the boat, sitting low
down, — one by the bows, the other at the rudder. The head was not kept to the wind; it
yawed and fell away.
As the day grew brighter, I began waving the last rag of my jacket to them; but they did
not notice me, and sat still, facing each other. I went to the lowest point of the low headland,
and gesticulated and shouted. There was no response, and the boat kept on her aimless
course, making slowly, very slowly, for the bay. Suddenly a great white bird flew up out of theboat, and neither of the men stirred nor noticed it; it circled round, and then came sweeping
overhead with its strong wings outspread.
Then I stopped shouting, and sat down on the headland and rested my chin on my hands
and stared. Slowly, slowly, the boat drove past towards the west. I would have swum out to it,
but something — a cold, vague fear — kept me back. In the afternoon the tide stranded the
boat, and left it a hundred yards or so to the westward of the ruins of the enclosure. The men
in it were dead, had been dead so long that they fell to pieces when I tilted the boat on its side
and dragged them out. One had a shock of red hair, like the captain of the “Ipecacuanha,”
and a dirty white cap lay in the bottom of the boat.
As I stood beside the boat, three of the Beasts came slinking out of the bushes and
sniffing towards me. One of my spasms of disgust came upon me. I thrust the little boat down
the beach and clambered on board her. Two of the brutes were Wolf-beasts, and came
forward with quivering nostrils and glittering eyes; the third was the horrible nondescript of
bear and bull. When I saw them approaching those wretched remains, heard them snarling at
one another and caught the gleam of their teeth, a frantic horror succeeded my repulsion. I
turned my back upon them, struck the lug and began paddling out to sea. I could not bring
myself to look behind me.
I lay, however, between the reef and the island that night, and the next morning went
round to the stream and filled the empty keg aboard with water. Then, with such patience as I
could command, I collected a quantity of fruit, and waylaid and killed two rabbits with my last
three cartridges. While I was doing this I left the boat moored to an inward projection of the
reef, for fear of the Beast People.
Chapter 22 — The Man Alone

In the evening I started, and drove out to sea before a gentle wind from the southwest,
slowly, steadily; and the island grew smaller and smaller, and the lank spire of smoke dwindled
to a finer and finer line against the hot sunset. The ocean rose up around me, hiding that low,
dark patch from my eyes. The daylight, the trailing glory of the sun, went streaming out of the
sky, was drawn aside like some luminous curtain, and at last I looked into the blue gulf of
immensity which the sunshine hides, and saw the floating hosts of the stars. The sea was
silent, the sky was silent. I was alone with the night and silence.
So I drifted for three days, eating and drinking sparingly, and meditating upon all that had
happened to me, — not desiring very greatly then to see men again. One unclean rag was
about me, my hair a black tangle: no doubt my discoverers thought me a madman.
It is strange, but I felt no desire to return to mankind. I was only glad to be quit of the
foulness of the Beast People. And on the third day I was picked up by a brig from Apia to San
Francisco. Neither the captain nor the mate would believe my story, judging that solitude and
danger had made me mad; and fearing their opinion might be that of others, I refrained from
telling my adventure further, and professed to recall nothing that had happened to me
between the loss of the “Lady Vain” and the time when I was picked up again, — the space of
a year.
I had to act with the utmost circumspection to save myself from the suspicion of insanity.
My memory of the Law, of the two dead sailors, of the ambuscades of the darkness, of the
body in the canebrake, haunted me; and, unnatural as it seems, with my return to mankind
came, instead of that confidence and sympathy I had expected, a strange enhancement of
the uncertainty and dread I had experienced during my stay upon the island. No one would
believe me; I was almost as queer to men as I had been to the Beast People. I may have
caught something of the natural wildness of my companions. They say that terror is a disease,
and anyhow I can witness that for several years now a restless fear has dwelt in my mind, —
such a restless fear as a half-tamed lion cub may feel.
My trouble took the strangest form. I could not persuade myself that the men and
women I met were not also another Beast People, animals half wrought into the outward
image of human souls, and that they would presently begin to revert, — to show first this
bestial mark and then that. But I have confided my case to a strangely able man, — a man
who had known Moreau, and seemed half to credit my story; a mental specialist, — and he
has helped me mightily, though I do not expect that the terror of that island will ever altogether
leave me. At most times it lies far in the back of my mind, a mere distant cloud, a memory,
and a faint distrust; but there are times when the little cloud spreads until it obscures the
whole sky. Then I look about me at my fellow-men; and I go in fear. I see faces, keen and
bright; others dull or dangerous; others, unsteady, insincere, — none that have the calm
authority of a reasonable soul. I feel as though the animal was surging up through them; that
presently the degradation of the Islanders will be played over again on a larger scale. I know
this is an illusion; that these seeming men and women about me are indeed men and women,
— men and women for ever, perfectly reasonable creatures, full of human desires and tender
solicitude, emancipated from instinct and the slaves of no fantastic Law, — beings altogether
different from the Beast Folk. Yet I shrink from them, from their curious glances, their inquiries
and assistance, and long to be away from them and alone. For that reason I live near the
broad free downland, and can escape thither when this shadow is over my soul; and very
sweet is the empty downland then, under the wind-swept sky.
When I lived in London the horror was well-nigh insupportable. I could not get away frommen: their voices came through windows; locked doors were flimsy safeguards. I would go out
into the streets to fight with my delusion, and prowling women would mew after me; furtive,
craving men glance jealously at me; weary, pale workers go coughing by me with tired eyes
and eager paces, like wounded deer dripping blood; old people, bent and dull, pass murmuring
to themselves; and, all unheeding, a ragged tail of gibing children. Then I would turn aside into
some chapel, — and even there, such was my disturbance, it seemed that the preacher
gibbered “Big Thinks,” even as the Ape-man had done; or into some library, and there the
intent faces over the books seemed but patient creatures waiting for prey. Particularly
nauseous were the blank, expressionless faces of people in trains and omnibuses; they
seemed no more my fellow-creatures than dead bodies would be, so that I did not dare to
travel unless I was assured of being alone. And even it seemed that I too was not a
reasonable creature, but only an animal tormented with some strange disorder in its brain
which sent it to wander alone, like a sheep stricken with gid.
This is a mood, however, that comes to me now, I thank God, more rarely. I have
withdrawn myself from the confusion of cities and multitudes, and spend my days surrounded
by wise books, — bright windows in this life of ours, lit by the shining souls of men. I see few
strangers, and have but a small household. My days I devote to reading and to experiments in
chemistry, and I spend many of the clear nights in the study of astronomy. There is — though
I do not know how there is or why there is — a sense of infinite peace and protection in the
glittering hosts of heaven. There it must be, I think, in the vast and eternal laws of matter, and
not in the daily cares and sins and troubles of men, that whatever is more than animal within
us must find its solace and its hope. I hope, or I could not live.
And so, in hope and solitude, my story ends.

Edward Prendick.
The Wheels of Chance
First published: 1896

Chapter 1 — The Principal Character in the Story

If you (presuming you are of the sex that does such things) — if you had gone into the
Drapery Emporium — which is really only magnificent for shop — of Messrs. Antrobus & Co.
— a perfectly fictitious “Co.,” by the bye — of Putney, on the 14th of August, 1895, had
turned to the right-hand side, where the blocks of white linen and piles of blankets rise up to
the rail from which the pink and blue prints depend, you might have been served by the
central figure of this story that is now beginning. He would have come forward, bowing and
swaying, he would have extended two hands with largish knuckles and enormous cuffs over
the counter, and he would have asked you, protruding a pointed chin and without the slightest
anticipation of pleasure in his manner, what he might have the pleasure of showing you.
Under certain circumstances — as, for instance, hats, baby linen, gloves, silks, lace, or
curtains — he would simply have bowed politely, and with a drooping expression, and making
a kind of circular sweep, invited you to “step this way,” and so led you beyond his ken; but
under other and happier conditions, — huckaback, blankets, dimity, cretonne, linen, calico,
are cases in point, — he would have requested you to take a seat, emphasising the hospitality
by leaning over the counter and gripping a chair back in a spasmodic manner, and so
proceeded to obtain, unfold, and exhibit his goods for your consideration. Under which happier
circumstances you might — if of an observing turn of mind and not too much of a housewife
to be inhuman — have given the central figure of this story less cursory attention.
Now if you had noticed anything about him, it would have been chiefly to notice how little
he was noticeable. He wore the black morning coat, the black tie, and the speckled grey
nether parts (descending into shadow and mystery below the counter) of his craft. He was of
a pallid complexion, hair of a kind of dirty fairness, greyish eyes, and a skimpy, immature
moustache under his peaked indeterminate nose. His features were all small, but none
illshaped. A rosette of pins decorated the lappel of his coat. His remarks, you would observe,
were entirely what people used to call cliche, formulae not organic to the occasion, but
stereotyped ages ago and learnt years since by heart. “This, madam,” he would say, “is
selling very well” “We are doing a very good article at four three a yard.” “We could show you
some. thing better, of course.” “No trouble, madam, I assure you.” Such were the simple
counters of his intercourse. So, I say, he would have presented himself to your superficial
observation. He would have danced about behind the counter, have neatly refolded the goods
he had shown you, have put on one side those you selected, extracted a little book with a
carbon leaf and a tinfoil sheet from a fixture, made you out a little bill in that weak flourishing
hand peculiar to drapers, and have bawled “Sayn!” Then a puffy little shop-walker would have
come into view, looked at the bill for a second, very hard (showing you a parting down the
middle of his head meanwhile), have scribbled a still more flourishing J. M. all over the
document, have asked you if there was nothing more, have stood by you — supposing that
you were paying cash — until the central figure of this story reappeared with the change. One
glance more at him, and the puffy little shop-walker would have been bowing you out, with
fountains of civilities at work all about you. And so the interview would have terminated.
But real literature, as distinguished from anecdote, does not concern itself with superficial
appearances alone. Literature is revelation. Modern literature is indecorous revelation. It is the
duty of the earnest author to tell you what you would not have seen — even at the cost of
some blushes. And the thing that you would not have seen about this young man, and the
thing of the greatest moment to this story, the thing that must be told if the book is to be
written, was — let us face it bravely — the Remarkable Condition of this Young Man’s Legs.
Let us approach the business with dispassionate explicitness. Let us assume somethingof the scientific spirit, the hard, almost professorial tone of the conscientious realist. Let us
treat this young man’s legs as a mere diagram, and indicate the points of interest with the
unemotional precision of a lecturer’s pointer. And so to our revelation. On the internal aspect
of the right ankle of this young man you would have observed, ladies and gentlemen, a
contusion and an abrasion; on the internal aspect of the left ankle a contusion also; on its
external aspect a large yellowish bruise. On his left shin there were two bruises, one a leaden
yellow graduating here and there into purple, and another, obviously of more recent date, of a
blotchy red — tumid and threatening. Proceeding up the left leg in a spiral manner, an
unnatural hardness and redness would have been discovered on the upper aspect of the calf,
and above the knee and on the inner side, an extraordinary expanse of bruised surface, a
kind of closely stippled shading of contused points. The right leg would be found to be bruised
in a marvellous manner all about and under the knee, and particularly on the interior aspect of
the knee. So far we may proceed with our details. Fired by these discoveries, an investigator
might perhaps have pursued his inquiries further — to bruises on the shoulders, elbows, and
even the finger joints, of the central figure of our story. He had indeed been bumped and
battered at an extraordinary number of points. But enough of realistic description is as good
as a feast, and we have exhibited enough for our purpose. Even in literature one must know
where to draw the line.
Now the reader may be inclined to wonder how a respectable young shopman should
have got his legs, and indeed himself generally, into such a dreadful condition. One might
fancy that he had been sitting with his nether extremities in some complicated machinery, a
threshing-machine, say, or one of those hay-making furies. But Sherlock Holmes (now happily
dead) would have fancied nothing of the kind. He would have recognised at once that the
bruises on the internal aspect of the left leg, considered in the light of the distribution of the
other abrasions and contusions, pointed unmistakably to the violent impact of the Mounting
Beginner upon the bicycling saddle, and that the ruinous state of the right knee was equally
eloquent of the concussions attendant on that person’s hasty, frequently causeless, and
invariably ill-conceived descents. One large bruise on the shin is even more characteristic of
the ‘prentice cyclist, for upon every one of them waits the jest of the unexpected treadle. You
try at least to walk your machine in an easy manner, and whack! — you are rubbing your shin.
So out of innocence we ripen. Two bruises on that place mark a certain want of aptitude in
learning, such as one might expect in a person unused to muscular exercise. Blisters on the
hands are eloquent of the nervous clutch of the wavering rider. And so forth, until Sherlock is
presently explaining, by the help of the minor injuries, that the machine ridden is an
oldfashioned affair with a fork instead of the diamond frame, a cushioned tire, well worn on the
hind wheel, and a gross weight all on of perhaps three-and-forty pounds.
The revelation is made. Behind the decorous figure of the attentive shopman that I had
the honour of showing you at first, rises a vision of a nightly struggle, of two dark figures and a
machine in a dark road, — the road, to be explicit, from Roehampton to Putney Hill, — and
with this vision is the sound of a heel spurning the gravel, a gasping and grunting, a shouting
of “Steer, man, steer!” a wavering unsteady flight, a spasmodic turning of the missile edifice of
man and machine, and a collapse. Then you descry dimly through the dusk the central figure
of this story sitting by the roadside and rubbing his leg at some new place, and his friend,
sympathetic (but by no means depressed), repairing the displacement of the handle-bar.
Thus even in a shop assistant does the warmth of manhood assert itself, and drive him
against all the conditions of his calling, against the counsels of prudence and the restrictions
of his means, to seek the wholesome delights of exertion and danger and pain. And our first
examination of the draper reveals beneath his draperies — the man! To which initial fact
(among others) we shall come again in the end.

But enough of these revelations. The central figure of our story is now going along
behind the counter, a draper indeed, with your purchases in his arms, to the warehouse,
where the various articles you have selected will presently be packed by the senior porter and
sent to you. Returning thence to his particular place, he lays hands on a folded piece of
gingham, and gripping the corners of the folds in his hands, begins to straighten them
punctiliously. Near him is an apprentice, apprenticed to the same high calling of draper’s
assistant, a ruddy, red-haired lad in a very short tailless black coat and a very high collar, who
is deliberately unfolding and refolding some patterns of cretonne. By twenty-one he too may
hope to be a full-blown assistant, even as Mr. Hoopdriver. Prints depend from the brass rails
above them, behind are fixtures full of white packages containing, as inscriptions testify, Lino,
Hd Bk, and Mull. You might imagine to see them that the two were both intent upon nothing
but smoothness of textile and rectitude of fold. But to tell the truth, neither is thinking of the
mechanical duties in hand. The assistant is dreaming of the delicious time — only four hours
off now — when he will resume the tale of his bruises and abrasions. The apprentice is nearer
the long long thoughts of boyhood, and his imagination rides cap-a-pie through the chambers
of his brain, seeking some knightly quest in honour of that Fair Lady, the last but one of the
girl apprentices to the dress-making upstairs. He inclines rather to street fighting against
revolutionaries — because then she could see him from the window.
Jerking them back to the present comes the puffy little shop-walker, with a paper in his
hand. The apprentice becomes extremely active. The shopwalker eyes the goods in hand.
“Hoopdriver,” he says, “how’s that line of g-sez-x ginghams? “
Hoopdriver returns from an imaginary triumph over the uncertainties of dismounting.
“They’re going fairly well, sir. But the larger checks seem hanging.”
The shop-walker brings up parallel to the counter. “Any particular time when you want
your holidays?” he asks.
Hoopdriver pulls at his skimpy moustache. “No — Don’t want them too late, sir, of
“How about this day week?”
Hoopdriver becomes rigidly meditative, gripping the corners of the gingham folds in his
hands. His face is eloquent of conflicting considerations. Can he learn it in a week? That’s the
question. Otherwise Briggs will get next week, and he will have to wait until September —
when the weather is often uncertain. He is naturally of a sanguine disposition. All drapers have
to be, or else they could never have the faith they show in the beauty, washability, and
unfading excellence of the goods they sell you. The decision comes at last. “That’ll do me very
well,” said Mr. Hoopdriver, terminating the pause.
The die is cast.
The shop-walker makes a note of it and goes on to Briggs in the “dresses,” the next in
the strict scale of precedence of the Drapery Emporium. Mr. Hoopdriver in alternating spasms
anon straightens his gingham and anon becomes meditative, with his tongue in the hollow of
his decaying wisdom tooth.


At supper that night, holiday talk held undisputed sway. Mr. Pritchard spoke of
“Scotland,” Miss Isaacs clamoured of Bettws-y-Coed, Mr. Judson displayed a proprietary
interest in the Norfolk Broads. “I?” said Hoopdriver when the question came to him. “Why,
cycling, of course.”
“You’re never going to ride that dreadful machine of yours, day after day?” said Miss
Howe of the Costume Department.
“I am,” said Hoopdriver as calmly as possible, pulling at the insufficient moustache. “I’mgoing for a Cycling Tour. Along the South Coast.”
“Well, all I hope, Mr. Hoopdriver, is that you’ll get fine weather,” said Miss Howe. “And
not come any nasty croppers.”
“And done forget some tinscher of arnica in yer bag,” said the junior apprentice in the
very high collar. (He had witnessed one of the lessons at the top of Putney Hill.)
“You stow it,” said Mr. Hoopdriver, looking hard and threateningly at the junior
apprentice, and suddenly adding in a tone of bitter contempt, — “Jampot.”
“I’m getting fairly safe upon it now,” he told Miss Howe.
At other times Hoopdriver might have further resented the satirical efforts of the
apprentice, but his mind was too full of the projected Tour to admit any petty delicacies of
dignity. He left the supper table early, so that he might put in a good hour at the desperate
gymnastics up the Roehampton Road before it would be time to come back for locking up.
When the gas was turned off for the night he was sitting on the edge of his bed, rubbing
arnica into his knee — a new and very big place — and studying a Road Map of the South of
England. Briggs of the “dresses,” who shared the room with him, was sitting up in bed and
trying to smoke in the dark. Briggs had never been on a cycle in his life, but he felt
Hoopdriver’s inexperience and offered such advice as occurred to him.
“Have the machine thoroughly well oiled,” said Briggs, “carry one or two lemons with you,
don’t tear yourself to death the first day, and sit upright. Never lose control of the machine,
and always sound the bell on every possible opportunity. You mind those things, and nothing
very much can’t happen to you, Hoopdriver — you take my word.”
He would lapse into silence for a minute, save perhaps for a curse or so at his pipe, and
then break out with an entirely different set of tips.
“Avoid running over dogs, Hoopdriver, whatever you do. It’s one of the worst things you
can do to run over a dog. Never let the machine buckle — there was a man killed only the
other day through his wheel buckling — don’t scorch, don’t ride on the foot-path, keep your
own side of the road, and if you see a tram — line, go round the corner at once, and hurry off
into the next county — and always light up before dark. You mind just a few little things like
that, Hoopdriver, and nothing much can’t happen to you — you take my word.”
“Right you are!” said Hoopdriver. “Good-night, old man.”
“Good-night,” said Briggs, and there was silence for a space, save for the succulent
respiration of the pipe. Hoopdriver rode off into Dreamland on his machine, and was scarcely
there before he was pitched back into the world of sense again. — Something — what was it?
“Never oil the steering. It’s fatal,” a voice that came from round a fitful glow of light, was
saying. “And clean the chain daily with black-lead. You mind just a few little things like that —”
“Lord LOVE us!” said Hoopdriver, and pulled the bedclothes over his ears.
Chapter 2 — The Riding Forth of Mr. Hoopdriver

Only those who toil six long days out of the seven, and all the year round, save for one
brief glorious fortnight or ten days in the summer time, know the exquisite sensations of the
First Holiday Morning. All the dreary, uninteresting routine drops from you suddenly, your
chains fall about your feet. All at once you are Lord of yourself, Lord of every hour in the long,
vacant day; you may go where you please, call none Sir or Madame, have a lappel free of
pins, doff your black morning coat, and wear the colour of your heart, and be a Man. You
grudge sleep, you grudge eating, and drinking even, their intrusion on those exquisite
moments. There will be no more rising before breakfast in casual old clothing, to go dusting
and getting ready in a cheerless, shutterdarkened, wrappered-up shop, no more imperious
cries of, “Forward, Hoopdriver,” no more hasty meals, and weary attendance on fitful old
women, for ten blessed days. The first morning is by far the most glorious, for you hold your
whole fortune in your hands. Thereafter, every night, comes a pang, a spectre, that will not be
exorcised — the premonition of the return. The shadow of going back, of being put in the cage
again for another twelve months, lies blacker and blacker across the sunlight. But on the first
morning of the ten the holiday has no past, and ten days seems as good as infinity.
And it was fine, full of a promise of glorious days, a deep blue sky with dazzling piles of
white cloud here and there, as though celestial haymakers had been piling the swathes of last
night’s clouds into cocks for a coming cartage. There were thrushes in the Richmond Road,
and a lark on Putney Heath. The freshness of dew was in the air; dew or the relics of an
overnight shower glittered on the leaves and grass. Hoopdriver had breakfasted early by Mrs.
Gunn’s complaisance. He wheeled his machine up Putney Hill, and his heart sang within him.
Halfway up, a dissipated-looking black cat rushed home across flile road and vanished under a
gate. All the big red-brick houses behind the variegated shrubs and trees had their blinds
down still, and he would not have changed places with a soul in any one of them for a hundred
He had on his new brown cycling suit — a handsome Norfolk jacket thing for 30 — and
his legs — those martyr legs — were more than consoled by thick chequered stockings, “thin
in the foot, thick in the leg,” for all they had endured. A neat packet of American cloth behind
the saddle contained his change of raiment, and the bell and the handle-bar and the hubs and
lamp, albeit a trifle freckled by wear, glittered blindingly in the rising sunlight. And at the top of
the hill, after only one unsuccessful attempt, which, somehow, terminated on the green,
Hoopdriver mounted, and with a stately and cautious restraint in his pace, and a dignified
curvature of path, began his great Cycling Tour along the Southern Coast.
There is only one phrase to describe his course at this stage, and that is — voluptuous
curves. He did not ride fast, he did not ride straight, an exacting critic might say he did not ride
well — but he rode generously, opulently, using the whole road and even nibbling at the
footpath. The excitement never flagged. So far he had never passed or been passed by
anything, but as yet the day was young and the road was clear. He doubted his steering so
much that, for the present, he had resolved to dismount at the approach of anything else
upon wheels. The shadows of the trees lay very long and blue across the road, the morning
sunlight was like amber fire.
At the cross-roads at the top of West Hill, where the cattle trough stands, he turned
towards Kingston and set himself to scale the little bit of ascent. An early heath-keeper, in his
velveteen jacket, marvelled at his efforts. And while he yet struggled, the head of a carter rose
over the brow.
At the sight of him Mr. Hoopdriver, according to his previous determination, resolved todismount. He tightened the brake, and the machine stopped dead. He was trying to think what
he did with his right leg whilst getting off. He gripped the handles and released the brake,
standing on the left pedal and waving his right foot in the air. Then — these things take so
long in the telling — he found the machine was falling over to the right. While he was deciding
upon a plan of action, gravitation appears to have been busy. He was still irresolute when he
found the machine on the ground, himself kneeling upon it, and a vague feeling in his mind
that again Providence had dealt harshly with his shin. This happened when he was just level
with the heathkeeper. The man in the approaching cart stood up to see the ruins better.
“THAT ain’t the way to get off,” said the heathkeeper.
Mr. Hoopdriver picked up the machine. The handle was twisted askew again He said
something under his breath. He would have to unscrew the beastly thing.
“THAT ain’t the way to get off,” repeated the heathkeeper, after a silence.
“I know that,” said Mr. Hoopdriver, testily, determined to overlook the new specimen on
his shin at any cost. He unbuckled the wallet behind the saddle, to get out a screw hammer.
“If you know it ain’t the way to get off — whaddyer do it for?” said the heath-keeper, in a
tone of friendly controversy.
Mr. Hoopdriver got out his screw hammer and went to the handle. He was annoyed.
“That’s my business, I suppose,” he said, fumbling with the screw. The unusual exertion had
made his hands shake frightfully.
The heath-keeper became meditative, and twisted his stick in his hands behind his back.
“You’ve broken yer ‘andle, ain’t yer?” he said presently. Just then the screw hammer slipped
off the nut. Mr. Hoopdriver used a nasty, low word.
“They’re trying things, them bicycles,” said the heath-keeper, charitably. “Very trying.”
Mr. Hoopdriver gave the nut a vicious turn and suddenly stood up — he was holding the front
wheel between his knees. “I wish,” said he, with a catch in his voice, “I wish you’d leave off
staring at me.”
Then with the air of one who has delivered an ultimatum, he began replacing the screw
hammer in the wallet.
The heath-keeper never moved. Possibly he raised his eyebrows, and certainly he stared
harder than he did before. “You’re pretty unsociable,” he said slowly, as Mr. Hoopdriver seized
the handles and stood ready to mount as soon as the cart had passed.
The indignation gathered slowly but surely. “Why don’t you ride on a private road of your
own if no one ain’t to speak to you?” asked the heath-keeper, perceiving more and more
clearly the bearing of the matter. “Can’t no one make a passin’ remark to you, Touchy? Ain’t I
good enough to speak to you? Been struck wooden all of a sudden?”
Mr. Hoopdriver stared into the Immensity of the Future. He was rigid with emotion. It was
like abusing the Lions in Trafalgar Square. But the heathkeeper felt his honour was at stake.
“Don’t you make no remarks to ‘IM,” said the keeper as the carter came up broadside to
them. “‘E’s a bloomin’ dook, ‘e is. ‘E don’t converse with no one under a earl. ‘E’s off to
Windsor, ‘e is; that’s why ‘e’s stickin’ his be’ind out so haughty. Pride! Why, ‘e’s got so much
of it, ‘e has to carry some of it in that there bundle there, for fear ‘e’d bust if ‘e didn’t ease
hisself a bit — ‘E—”
But Mr. Hoopdriver heard no more. He was hopping vigorously along the road, in a
spasmodic attempt to remount. He missed the treadle once and swore viciously, to the
keeper’s immense delight. “Nar! Nar!” said the heath-keeper.
In another moment Mr. Hoopdriver was up, and after one terrific lurch of the machine,
the heathkeeper dropped out of earshot. Mr. Hoopdriver would have liked to look back at his
enemy, but he usually twisted round and upset if he tried that. He had to imagine the indignant
heath-keeper telling the carter all about it. He tried to infuse as much disdain as possible into
his retreating aspect.
He drove on his sinuous way down the dip by the new mere and up the little rise to thecrest of the hill that drops into Kingston Vale; and so remarkable is the psychology of cycling,
that he rode all the straighter and easier because the emotions the heath-keeper had aroused
relieved his mind of the constant expectation of collapse that had previously unnerved him. To
ride a bicycle properly is very like a love affair — chiefly it is a matter of faith. Believe you do
it, and the thing is done; doubt, and, for the life of you, you cannot.
Now you may perhaps imagine that as he rode on, his feelings towards the heath-keeper
were either vindictive or remorseful, — vindictive for the aggravation or remorseful for his own
injudicious display of ill temper. As a matter of fact, they were nothing of the sort. A sudden, a
wonderful gratitude, possessed him. The Glory of the Holidays had resumed its sway with a
sudden accession of splendour. At the crest of the hill he put his feet upon the footrests, and
now riding moderately straight, went, with a palpitating brake, down that excellent descent. A
new delight was in his eyes, quite over and above the pleasure of rushing through the keen,
sweet, morning air. He reached out his thumb and twanged his bell out of sheer happiness.
“‘He’s a bloomin’ Dook — he is!’” said Mr. Hoopdriver to himself, in a soft undertone, as
he went soaring down the hill, and again, “‘He’s a bloomin’ Dook!’” He opened his mouth in a
silent laugh. It was having a decent cut did it. His social superiority had been so evident that
even a man like that noticed it. No more Manchester Department for ten days! Out of
Manchester, a Man. The draper Hoopdriver, the Hand, had vanished from existence. Instead
was a gentleman, a man of pleasure, with a five-pound note, two sovereigns, and some silver
at various convenient points of his person. At any rate as good as a Dook, if not precisely in
the peerage. Involuntarily at the thought of his funds Hoopdriver’s right hand left the handle
and sought his breast pocket, to be immediately recalled by a violent swoop of the machine
towards the cemetery. Whirroo! Just missed that half-brick! Mischievous brutes there were in
the world to put such a thing in the road. Some blooming ‘Arry or other! Ought to prosecute a
few of these roughs, and the rest would know better. That must be the buckle of the wallet
was rattling on the mud-guard. How cheerfully the wheels buzzed!
The cemetery was very silent and peaceful, but the Vale was waking, and windows
rattled and squeaked up, and a white dog came out of one of the houses and yelped at him.
He got off, rather breathless, at the foot of Kingston Hill, and pushed up. Halfway up, an early
milk chariot rattled by him; two dirty men with bundles came hurrying down. Hoopdriver felt
sure they were burglars, carrying home the swag.
It was up Kingston Hill that he first noticed a peculiar feeling, a slight tightness at his
knees; but he noticed, too, at the top that he rode straighter than he did before. The pleasure
of riding straight blotted out these first intimations of fatigue. A man on horseback appeared;
Hoopdriver, in a tumult of soul at his own temerity, passed him. Then down the hill into
Kingston, with the screw hammer, behind in the wallet, rattling against the oil can. He passed,
without misadventure, a fruiterer’s van and a sluggish cartload of bricks. And in Kingston
Hoopdriver, with the most exquisite sensations, saw the shutters half removed from a draper’s
shop, and two yawning youths, in dusty old black jackets and with dirty white comforters about
their necks, clearing up the planks and boxes and wrappers in the window, preparatory to
dressing it out. Even so had Hoopdriver been on the previous day. But now, was he not a
bloomin’ Dook, palpably in the sight of common men? Then round the corner to the right —
bell banged furiously — and so along the road to Surbiton.
Whoop for Freedom and Adventure! Every now and then a house with an expression of
sleepy surprise would open its eye as he passed, and to the right of him for a mile or so the
weltering Thames flashed and glittered. Talk of your joie de vivre. Albeit with a certain
cramping sensation about the knees and calves slowly forcing itself upon his attention.
Chapter 3 — The Shameful Episode of the Young Lady in Grey

Now you must understand that Mr. Hoopdriver was not one of your fast young men. If he
had been King Lemuel, he could not have profited more by his mother’s instructions. He
regarded the feminine sex as something to bow to and smirk at from a safe distance. Years of
the intimate remoteness of a counter leave their mark upon a man. It was an adventure for
him to take one of the Young Ladies of the establishment to church on a Sunday. Few
modern young men could have merited less the epithet “Dorg.” But I have thought at times
that his machine may have had something of the blade in its metal. Decidedly it was a
machine with a past. Mr. Hoopdriver had bought it second-hand from Hare’s in Putney, and
Hare said it had had several owners. Second-hand was scarcely the word for it, and Elare was
mildly puzzled that he should be selling such an antiquity. He said it was perfectly sound, if a
little old-fashioned, but he was absolutely silent about its moral character. It may even have
begun its career with a poet, say, in his glorious youth. It may have been the bicycle of a
Really Bad Man. No one who has ever ridden a cycle of any kind but will witness that the
things are unaccountably prone to pick up bad habits — and keep them.
It is undeniable that it became convulsed with the most violent emotions directly the
Young Lady in Grey appeared. It began an absolutely unprecedented Wabble —
unprecedented so far as Hoopdriver’s experience went. It “showed off” — the most decadent
sinuosity. It left a track like one of Beardsley’s feathers. He suddenly realised, too, that his cap
was loose on his head and his breath a mere remnant.
The Young Lady in Grey was also riding a bicycle. She was dressed in a beautiful
bluishgray, and the sun behind her drew her outline in gold and left the rest in shadow. Hoopdriver
was dimly aware that she was young, rather slender, dark, and with a bright colour and bright
eyes. Strange doubts possessed him as to the nature of her nether costume. He had heard of
such things of course. French, perhaps. Her handles glittered; a jet of sunlight splashed off
her bell blindingly. She was approaching the high road along an affluent from the villas of
Surbiton. fee roads converged slantingly. She was travelling at about the same pace as Mr.
Hoopdriver. The appearances pointed to a meeting at the fork of the roads.
Hoopdriver was seized with a horrible conflict of doubts. By contrast with her he rode
disgracefully. Had he not better get off at once and pretend something was wrong with his
treadle? Yet even the end of getting off was an uncertainty. That last occasion on Putney
Heath! On the other hand, what would happen if he kept on? To go very slow seemed the
abnegation of his manhood. To crawl after a mere schoolgirl! Besides, she was not riding very
fast. On the other hand, to thrust himself in front of her, consuming the road in his tendril-like
advance, seemed an incivility — greed. He would leave her such a very little. His business
training made him prone to bow and step aside. If only one could take one’s hands off the
handles, one might pass with a silent elevation of the hat, of course. But even that was a little
suggestive of a funeral.
Meanwhile the roads converged. She was looking at him. She was flushed, a little thin,
and had very bright eyes. Her red lips fell apart. She may have been riding hard, but it looked
uncommonly like a faint smile. And the things were — yes! — RATIONALS! Suddenly an
impulse to bolt from the situation became clamorous. Mr. Hoopdriver pedalled convulsively,
intending to pass her. He jerked against some tin thing on the road, and it flew up between
front wheel and mud-guard. He twisted round towards her. Had the machine a devil?
At that supreme moment it came across him that he would have done wiser to dismount.
He gave a frantic ‘whoop’ and tried to get round, then, as he seemed falling over, he pulled
the handles straight again and to the left by an instinctive motion, and shot behind her hindwheel, missing her by a hair’s breadth. The pavement kerb awaited him. He tried to recover,
and found himself jumped up on the pavement and riding squarely at a neat wooden paling.
He struck this with a terrific impact and shot forward off his saddle into a clumsy
entanglement. Then he began to tumble over sideways, and completed the entire figure in a
sitting position on the gravel, with his feet between the fork and the stay of the machine. The
concussion on the gravel shook his entire being. He remained in that position, wishing that he
had broken his neck, wishing even more heartily that he had never been born. The glory of life
had departed. Bloomin’ Dook, indeed! These unwomanly women!
There was a soft whirr, the click of a brake, two footfalls, and the Young Lady in Grey
stood holding her machine. She had turned round and come back to him. The warm sunlight
now was in her face. “Are you hurt?” she said. She had a pretty, clear, girlish voice. She was
really very young — quite a girl, in fact. And rode so well! It was a bitter draught.
Mr. Hoopdriver stood up at once. “Not a bit,” he said, a little ruefully. He became painfully
aware that large patches of gravel scarcely improve the appearance of a Norfolk suit. “I’m
very sorry indeed —”
“It’s my fault,” she said, interrupting and so saving him on the very verge of calling her
‘Miss.’ (He knew ‘Miss’ was wrong, but it was deep-seated habit with him.) “I tried to pass you
on the wrong side.” Her face and eyes seemed all alive. “It’s my place to be sorry.”
“But it was my steering —”
“I ought to have seen you were a Novice” — with a touch of superiority. “But you rode so
straight coming along there!”
She really was — dashed pretty. Mr. Hoopdriver’s feelings passed the nadir. When he
spoke again there was the faintest flavour of the aristocratic in his voice.
“It’s my first ride, as a matter of fact. But that’s no excuse for my ah! blundering —”
“Your finger’s bleeding,” she said, abruptly.
He saw his knuckle was barked. “I didn’t feel it,” he said, feeling manly.
“You don’t at first. Have you any stickingplaster? If not —” She balanced her machine
against herself. She had a little side pocket, and she whipped out a small packet of
stickingplaster with a pair of scissors in a sheath at the side, and cut off a generous portion. He had a
wild impulse to ask her to stick it on for him. Controlled. “Thank you,” he said.
“Machine all right?” she asked, looking past him at the prostrate vehicle, her hands on
her handle-bar. For the first time Hoopdriver did not feel proud of his machine.
He turned and began to pick up the fallen fabric. He looked over his shoulder, and she
was gone, turned his head over the other shoulder down the road, and she was riding off.
“ORF!” said Mr. Hoopdriver. “Well, I’m blowed! — Talk about Slap Up!” (His aristocratic
refinement rarely adorned his speech in his private soliloquies.) His mind was whirling. One
fact was clear. A most delightful and novel human being had flashed across his horizon and
was going out of his life again. The Holiday madness was in his blood. She looked round!
At that he rushed his machine into the road, and began a hasty ascent. Unsuccessful.
Try again. Confound it, will he NEVER be able to get up on the thing again? She will be round
the corner in a minute. Once more. Ah! Pedal! Wabble! No! Right this time! He gripped the
handles and put his head down. He would overtake her.
The situation was primordial. The Man beneath prevailed for a moment over the civilised
superstructure, the Draper. He pushed at the pedals with archaic violence. So Palaeolithic
man may have ridden his simple bicycle of chipped flint in pursuit of his exogamous affinity.
She vanished round the corner. His effort was Titanic. What should he say when he overtook
her? That scarcely disturbed him at first. How fine she had looked, flushed with the exertion of
riding, breathing a little fast, but elastic and active! Talk about your ladylike, homekeeping girls
with complexions like cold veal! But what should he say to her? That was a bother. And he
could not lift his cap without risking a repetition of his previous ignominy. She was a real
Young Lady. No mistake about that! None of your blooming shop girls. (There is no greatercontempt in the world than that of shop men for shop girls, unless it be that of shop girls for
shop men.) Phew! This was work. A certain numbness came and went at his knees.
“May I ask to whom I am indebted?” he panted to himself, trying it over. That might do.
Lucky he had a card case! A hundred a shilling — while you wait. He was getting winded. The
road was certainly a bit uphill. He turned the corner and saw a long stretch of road, and a grey
dress vanishing. He set his teeth. Had he gained on her at all? “Monkey on a gridiron!” yelped
a small boy. Hoopdriver redoubled his efforts. His breath became audible, his steering
unsteady, his pedalling positively ferocious. A drop of perspiration ran into his eye, irritant as
acid. The road really was uphill beyond dispute. All his physiology began to cry out at him. A
last tremendous effort brought him to the corner and showed yet another extent of shady
roadway, empty save for a baker’s van. His front wheel suddenly shrieked aloud. “Oh Lord!”
said Hoopdriver, relaxing.
Anyhow she was not in sight. He got off unsteadily, and for a moment his legs felt like
wisps of cotton. He balanced his machine against the grassy edge of the path and sat down
panting. His hands were gnarled with swollen veins and shaking palpably, his breath came
“I’m hardly in training yet,” he remarked. His legs had gone leaden. “I don’t feel as
though I’d had a mouthful of breakfast.” Presently he slapped his side pocket and produced
therefrom a brand-new cigarette case and a packet of Vansittart’s Red Herring cigarettes. He
filled the case. Then his eye fell with a sudden approval on the ornamental chequering of his
new stockings. The expression in his eyes faded slowly to abstract meditation.
“She WAS a stunning girl,” he said. “I wonder if I shall ever set eyes on her again. And
she knew how to ride, too! Wonder what she thought of me.”
The phrase ‘bloomin’ Dook’ floated into his mind with a certain flavour of comfort.
He lit a cigarette, and sat smoking and meditating. He did not even look up when vehicles
passed. It was perhaps ten minutes before he roused himself. “What rot it is! What’s the good
of thinking such things,” he said. “I’m only a blessed draper’s assistant.” (To be exact, he did
not say blessed. The service of a shop may polish a man’s exterior ways, but the ‘prentices’
dormitory is an indifferent school for either manners or morals.) He stood up and began
wheeling his machine towards Esher. It was going to be a beautiful day, and the hedges and
trees and the open country were all glorious to his town-tired eyes. But it was a little different
from the elation of his start.
“Look at the gentleman wizzer bicitle,” said a nursemaid on the path to a personage in a
perambulator. That healed him a little. “‘Gentleman wizzer bicitle,’ — ‘bloomin’ Dook’ — I can’t
look so very seedy,” he said to himself.
“I WONDER— I should just like to know —”
There was something very comforting in the track of HER pneumatic running straight and
steady along the road before him. It must be hers. No other pneumatic had been along the
road that morning. It was just possible, of course, that he might see her once more — coming
back. Should he try and say something smart? He speculated what manner of girl she might
be. Probably she was one of these here New Women. He had a persuasion the cult had been
maligned. Anyhow she was a Lady. And rich people, too! Her machine couldn’t have cost
much under twenty pounds. His mind came round and dwelt some time on her visible self.
Rational dress didn’t look a bit unwomanly. However, he disdained to be one of your
fortunehunters. Then his thoughts drove off at a tangent. He would certainly have to get
something to eat at the next public house.
Chapter 4 — On the Road to Ripley

In the fulness of time, Mr. Hoopdriver drew near the Marquis of Granby at Esher, and as
he came under the railway arch and saw the inn in front of him, he mounted his machine
again and rode bravely up to the doorway. Burton and biscuit and cheese he had, which,
indeed, is Burton in its proper company; and as he was eating there came a middleaged man
in a drab cycling suit, very red and moist and angry in the face, and asked bitterly for a lemon
squash. And he sat down upon the seat in the bar and mopped his face. But scarcely had he
sat down before he got up again and stared out of the doorway.
“Damn!” said he. Then, “Damned Fool!”
“Eigh?” said Mr. Hoopdriver, looking round suddenly with a piece of cheese in his cheek.
The man in drab faced him. “I called myself a Damned Fool, sir. Have you any
“Oh! — None. None,” said Mr. Hoopdriver. “I thought you spoke to me. I didn’t hear what
you said.”
“To have a contemplative disposition and an energetic temperament, sir, is hell. Hell, I
tell you. A contemplative disposition and a phlegmatic temperament, all very well. But energy
and philosophy —!”
Mr. Hoopdriver looked as intelligent as he could, but said nothing.
“There’s no hurry, sir, none whatever. I came out for exercise, gentle exercise, and to
notice the scenery and to botanise. And no sooner do I get on the accursed machine, than off
I go hammer and tongs; I never look to right or left, never notice a flower, never see a view,
get hot, juicy, red, — like a grilled chop. Here I am, sir. Come from Guildford in something
under the hour. WHY, sir?”
Mr. Hoopdriver shook his head.
“Because I’m a damned fool, sir. Because I’ve reservoirs and reservoirs of muscular
energy, and one or other of them is always leaking. It’s a most interesting road, birds and
trees, I’ve no doubt, and wayside flowers, and there’s nothing I should enjoy more than
watching them. But I can’t. Get me on that machine, and I have to go. Get me on anything,
and I have to go. And I don’t want to go a bit. WHY should a man rush about like a rocket, all
pace and fizzle? Why? It makes me furious. I can assure you, sir, I go scorching along the
road, and cursing aloud at myself for doing it. A quiet, dignified, philosophical man, that’s what
I am — at bottom; and here I am dancing with rage and swearing like a drunken tinker at a
perfect stranger —
“But my day’s wasted. I’ve lost all that country road, and now I’m on the fringe of
London. And I might have loitered all the morning! Ugh! Thank Heaven, sir, you have not the
irritable temperament, that you are not goaded to madness by your endogenous sneers, by
the eternal wrangling of an uncomfortable soul and body. I tell you, I lead a cat and dog life —
But what IS the use of talking? — It’s all of a piece!”
He tossed his head with unspeakable self-disgust, pitched the lemon squash into his
mouth, paid for it, and without any further remark strode to the door. Mr. Hoopdriver was still
wondering what to say when his interlocutor vanished. There was a noise of a foot spurning
the gravel, and when Mr. Hoopdriver reached the doorway, the man in drab was a score of
yards Londonward. He had already gathered pace. He pedalled with ill-suppressed anger, and
his head was going down. In another moment he flew swiftly out of sight under the railway
arch, and Mr. Hoopdriver saw him no more.

After this whirlwind Mr. Hoopdriver paid his reckoning and — being now a little rested
about the muscles of the knees — resumed his saddle and rode on in the direction of Ripley,
along an excellent but undulating road. He was pleased to find his command over his machine
already sensibly increased. He set himself little exercises as he went along and performed
them with variable success. There was, for instance, steering in between a couple of stones,
say a foot apart, a deed of little difficulty as far as the front wheel is concerned. But the back
wheel, not being under the sway of the human eye, is apt to take a vicious jump over the
obstacle, which sends a violent concussion all along the spine to the skull, and will even jerk a
loosely fastened hat over the eyes, and so lead to much confusion. And again, there was
taking the hand or hands off the handlebar, a thing simple in itself, but complex in its
consequences. This particularly was a feat Mr. Hoopdriver desired to do, for several divergent
reasons; but at present it simply led to convulsive balancings and novel and inelegant modes
of dismounting.
The human nose is, at its best, a needless excrescence. There are those who consider it
ornamental, and would regard a face deprived of its assistance with pity or derision; but it is
doubtful whether our esteem is dictated so much by a sense of its absolute beauty as by the
vitiating effect of a universally prevalent fashion. In the case of bicycle students, as in the
young of both sexes, its inutility is aggravated by its persistent annoyance — it requires
constant attention. Until one can ride with one hand, and search for, secure, and use a pocket
handkerchief with the other, cycling is necessarily a constant series of descents. Nothing can
be further from the author’s ambition than a wanton realism, but Mr. Hoopdriver’s nose is a
plain and salient fact, and face it we must. And, in addition to this inconvenience, there are
flies. Until the cyclist can steer with one hand, his face is given over to Beelzebub.
Contemplative flies stroll over it, and trifle absently with its most sensitive surfaces. The only
way to dislodge them is to shake the head forcibly and to writhe one’s features violently. This
is not only a lengthy and frequently ineffectual method, but one exceedingly terrifying to foot
passengers. And again, sometimes the beginner rides for a space with one eye closed by
perspiration, giving him a waggish air foreign to his mood and ill calculated to overawe the
impertinent. However, you will appreciate now the motive of Mr. Hoopdriver’s experiments. He
presently attained sufficient dexterity to slap himself smartly and violently in the face with his
right hand, without certainly overturning the machine; but his pocket handkerchief might have
been in California for any good it was to him while he was in the saddle.
Yet you must not think that because Mr. Hoopdriver was a little uncomfortable, he was
unhappy in the slightest degree. In the background of his consciousness was the sense that
about this time Briggs would be half-way through his window dressing, and Gosling, the
apprentice, busy, with a chair turned down over the counter and his ears very red, trying to
roll a piece of huckaback — only those who have rolled pieces of huckaback know quite how
detestable huckaback is to roll — and the shop would be dusty and, perhaps, the governor
about and snappy. And here was quiet and greenery, and one mucked about as the desire
took one, without a soul to see, and here was no wailing of “Sayn,” no folding of remnants, no
voice to shout, “Hoopdriver, forward!” And once he almost ran over something wonderful, a
little, low, red beast with a yellowish tail, that went rushing across the road before him. It was
the first weasel he had ever seen in his cockney life. There were miles of this, scores of miles
of this before him, pinewood and oak forest, purple, heathery moorland and grassy down, lush
meadows, where shining rivers wound their lazy way, villages with square-towered, flint
churches, and rambling, cheap, and hearty inns, clean, white, country towns, long downhill
stretches, where one might ride at one’s ease (overlooking a jolt or so), and far away, at the
end of it all, — the sea.
What mattered a fly or so in the dawn of these delights? Perhaps he had been dashed a
minute by the shameful episode of the Young Lady in Grey, and perhaps the memory of itwas making itself a little lair in a corner of his brain from which it could distress him in the
retrospect by suggesting that he looked like a fool; but for the present that trouble was
altogether in abeyance. The man in drab — evidently a swell — had spoken to him as his
equal, and the knees of his brown suit and the chequered stockings were ever before his
eyes. (Or, rather, you could see the stockings by carrying the head a little to one side.) And to
feel, little by little, his mastery over this delightful, treacherous machine, growing and growing!
Every half-mile or so his knees reasserted themselves, and he dismounted and sat awhile by
the roadside.
It was at a charming little place between Esher and Cobham, where a bridge crosses a
stream, that Mr. Hoopdriver came across the other cyclist in brown. It is well to notice the fact
here, although the interview was of the slightest, because it happened that subsequently
Hoopdriver saw a great deal more of this other man in brown. The other cyclist in brown had a
machine of dazzling newness, and a punctured pneumatic lay across his knees. He was a
man of thirty or more, with a whitish face, an aquiline nose, a lank, flaxen moustache, and
very fair hair, and he scowled at the job before him. At the sight of him Mr. Hoopdriver pulled
himself together, and rode by with the air of one born to the wheel. “A splendid morning,” said
Mr. Hoopdriver, “and a fine surface.”
“The morning and you and the surface be everlastingly damned!” said the other man in
brown as Hoopdriver receded. Hoopdriver heard the mumble and did not distinguish the
words, and he felt a pleasing sense of having duly asserted the wide sympathy that binds all
cyclists together, of having behaved himself as becomes one of the brotherhood of the wheel.
The other man in brown watched his receding aspect. “Greasy proletarian,” said the other
man in brown, feeling a prophetic dislike. “Got a suit of brown, the very picture of this. One
would think his sole aim in life had been to caricature me. It’s Fortune’s way with me. Look at
his insteps on the treadles! Why does Heaven make such men?”
And having lit a cigarette, the other man in brown returned to the business in hand.
Mr. Hoopdriver worked up the hill towards Cobham to a point that he felt sure was out of
sight of the other man in brown, and then he dismounted and pushed his machine; until the
proximity of the village and a proper pride drove him into the saddle again.


Beyond Cobham came a delightful incident, delightful, that is, in its beginning if a trifle
indeterminate in the retrospect. It was perhaps half-way between Cobham and Ripley. Mr.
Hoopdriver dropped down a little hill, where, unfenced from the road, fine mossy trees and
bracken lay on either side; and looking up he saw an open country before him, covered with
heather and set with pines, and a yellow road runing across it, and half a mile away perhaps,
a little grey figure by the wayside waving something white. “Never!” said Mr. Hoopdriver with
his hands tightening on the handles.
He resumed the treadles, staring away before him, jolted over a stone, wabbled,
recovered, and began riding faster at once, with his eyes ahead. “It can’t be,” said Hoopdriver.
He rode his straightest, and kept his pedals spinning, albeit a limp numbness had
resumed possession of his legs.” It CAN’T be,” he repeated, feeling every moment more
assured that it WAS. “Lord! I don’t know even now,” said Mr. Hoopdriver (legs awhirling), and
then, “Blow my legs!”
But he kept on and drew nearer and nearer, breathing hard and gathering flies like a
flypaper. In the valley he was hidden. Then the road began to rise, and the resistance of the
pedals grew. As he crested the hill he saw her, not a hundred yards away from him. “It’s her!”
he said. “It’s her — right enough. It’s the suit’s done it,” — which was truer even than Mr.
Hoopdriver thought. But now she was not waving her handkerchief, she was not even looking
at him. She was wheeling her machine slowly along the road towards him, and admiring thepretty wooded hills towards Weybridge. She might have been unaware of his existence for all
the recognition he got.
For a moment horrible doubts troubled Mr. Hoopdriver. Had that handkerchief been a
dream? Besides which he was deliquescent and scarlet, and felt so. It must be her coquetry
— the handkerchief was indisputable. Should he ride up to her and get off, or get off and ride
up to her? It was as well she didn’t look, because he would certainly capsize if he lifted his
cap. Perhaps that was her consideration. Even as he hesitated he was upon her. She must
have heard his breathing. He gripped the brake. Steady! His right leg waved in the air, and he
came down heavily and staggering, but erect. She turned her eyes upon him with admirable
Mr. Hoopdriver tried to smile pleasantly, hold up his machine, raise his cap, and bow
gracefully. Indeed, he felt that he did as much. He was a man singularly devoid of the
minutiae of self-consciousness, and he was quite unaware of a tail of damp hair lying across
his forehead, and just clearing his eyes, and of the general disorder of his coiffure. There was
an interrogative pause.
“What can I have the pleasure —” began Mr. Haopdriver, insinuatingly. “I mean”
(remembering his emancipation and abruptly assuming his most aristocratic intonation), “can I
be of any assistance to you?”
The Young Lady in Grey bit her lower lip and said very prettily, “None, thank you.” She
glanced away from him and made as if she would proceed.
“Oh!” said Mr. Hoopdriver, taken aback and suddenly crestfallen again. It was so
unexpected. He tried to grasp the situation. Was she coquetting? Or had he —?
“Excuse me, one minute,” he said, as she began to wheel her machine again.
“Yes?” she said, stopping and staring a little, with the colour in her cheeks deepening.
“I should not have alighted if I had not — imagined that you — er, waved something
white —” He paused.
She looked at him doubtfully. He HAD seen it! She decided that he was not an
unredeemed rough taking advantage of a mistake, but an innocent soul meaning well while
seeking happiness. “I DID wave my handkerchief,” she said. “I’m very sorry. I am expecting —
a friend, a gentleman,” — she seemed to flush pink for a minute. “He is riding a bicycle and
dressed in — in brown; and at a distance, you know —”
“Oh, quite!” said Mr. Hoopdriver, bearing up in manly fashion against his bitter
disappointment. “Certainly.”
“I’m awfully sorry, you know. Troubling you to dismount, and all that.”
“No trouble. ‘Ssure you,” said Mr. Hoopdriver, mechanically and bowing over his saddle
as if it was a counter. Somehow he could not find it in his heart to tell her that the man was
beyond there with a punctured pneumatic. He looked back along the road and tried to think of
something else to say. But the gulf in the conversation widened rapidly and hopelessly.
“There’s nothing further,” began Mr. Hoopdriver desperately, recurring to his stock of cliches.
“Nothing, thank you,” she said decisively. And immediately, “This IS the Ripley road?”
“Certainly,” said Mr. Hoopdriver. “Ripley is about two miles from here. According to the
“Thank you,” she said warmly. “Thank you so much. I felt sure there was no mistake.
And I really am awfully sorry —”
“Don’t mention it,” said Mr. Hoopdriver. “Don’t mention it.” He hesitated and gripped his
handles to mount. “It’s me,” he said, “ought to be sorry.” Should he say it? Was it an
impertinence? Anyhow! — “Not being the other gentleman, you know.”
He tried a quietly insinuating smile that he knew for a grin even as he smiled it; felt she
disapproved — that she despised him, was overcome with shame at her expression, turned
his back upon her, and began (very clumsily) to mount. He did so with a horrible swerve, and
went pedalling off, riding very badly, as he was only too painfully aware. Nevertheless, thankHeaven for the mounting! He could not see her because it was so dangerous for him to look
round, but he could imagine her indignant and pitiless. He felt an unspeakable idiot. One had
to be so careful what one said to Young Ladies, and he’d gone and treated her just as though
she was only a Larky Girl. It was unforgivable. He always WAS a fool. You could tell from her
manner she didn’t think him a gentleman. One glance, and she seemed to look clear through
him and all his presence. What rot it was venturing to speak to a girl like that! With her
education she was bound to see through him at once.
How nicely she spoke too! nice clear-cut words! She made him feel what slush his own
accent was. And that last silly remark. What was it? ‘Not being the other gentleman, you
know!’ No point in it. And ‘GENTLEMAN!’ What COULD she be thinking of him?
But really the Young Lady in Grey had dismissed Hoopdriver from her thoughts almost
before he had vanished round the corner. She had thought no ill of him. His manifest awe and
admiration of her had given her not an atom of offence. But for her just now there were
weightier things to think about, things that would affect all the rest of her life. She continued
slowly walking her machine Londonward. Presently she stopped. “Oh! Why DOESN’T he
come?” she said, and stamped her foot petulantly. Then, as if in answer, coming down the hill
among the trees, appeared the other man in brown, dismounted and wheeling his machine.
Chapter 5 — How Mr. Hoopdriver Was Haunted

As Mr. Hoopdriver rode swaggering along the Ripley road, it came to him, with an
unwarrantable sense of comfort, that he had seen the last of the Young Lady in Grey. But the
ill-concealed bladery of the machine, the present machinery of Fate, the deus ex machina, so
to speak, was against him. The bicycle, torn from this attractive young woman, grew heavier
and heavier, and continually more unsteady. It seemed a choice between stopping at Ripley or
dying in the flower of his days. He went into the Unicorn, after propping his machine outside
the door, and, as he cooled down and smoked his Red Herring cigarette while the cold meat
was getting ready, he saw from the window the Young Lady in Grey and the other man in
brown, entering Ripley.
They filled him with apprehension by looking at the house which sheltered him, but the
sight of his bicycle, propped in a drunk and incapable attitude against the doorway, humping
its rackety mud-guard and leering at them with its darkened lantern eye, drove them away —
so it seemed to Mr. Hoopdriver — to the spacious swallow of the Golden Dragon. The young
lady was riding very slowly, but the other man in brown had a bad puncture and was wheeling
his machine. Mr. Hoopdriver noted his flaxen moustache, his aquiline nose, his rather bent
shoulders, with a sudden, vivid dislike.
The maid at the Unicorn is naturally a pleasant girl, but she is jaded by the incessant
incidence of cyclists, and Hoopdriver’s mind, even as he conversed with her in that cultivated
voice of his — of the weather, of the distance from London, and of the excellence of the
Ripley road — wandered to the incomparable freshness and brilliance of the Young Lady in
Grey. As he sat at meat he kept turning his head to the window to see what signs there were
of that person, but the face of the Golden Dragon displayed no appreciation of the delightful
morsel it had swallowed. As an incidental consequence of this distraction, Mr. Hoopdriver was
for a minute greatly inconvenienced by a mouthful of mustard. After he had called for his
reckoning he went, his courage being high with meat and mustard, to the door, intending to
stand, with his legs wide apart and his hands deep in his pockets, and stare boldly across the
road. But just then the other man in brown appeared in the gateway of the Golden Dragon
yard — it is one of those delightful inns that date from the coaching days — wheeling his
punctured machine. He was taking it to Flambeau’s, the repairer’s. He looked up and saw
Hoopdriver, stared for a minute, and then scowled darkly.
But Hoopdriver remained stoutly in the doorway until the other man in brown had
disappeared into Flambeau’s. Then he glanced momentarily at the Golden Dragon, puckered
his mouth into a whistle of unconcern, and proceeded to wheel his machine into the road until
a sufficient margin for mounting was secured.
Now, at that time, I say, Hoopdriver was rather desirous than not of seeing no more of
the Young Lady in Grey. The other man in brown he guessed was her brother, albeit that
person was of a pallid fairness, differing essentially from her rich colouring; and, besides, he
felt he had made a hopeless fool of himself. But the afternoon was against him, intolerably
hot, especially on the top of his head, and the virtue had gone out of his legs to digest his cold
meat, and altogether his ride to Guildford was exceedingly intermittent. At times he would
walk, at times lounge by the wayside, and every public house, in spite of Briggs and a
sentiment of economy, meant a lemonade and a dash of bitter. (For that is the experience of
all those who go on wheels, that drinking begets thirst, even more than thirst begets drinking,
until at last the man who yields becomes a hell unto himself, a hell in which the fire dieth not,
and the thirst is not quenched.) Until a pennyworth of acrid green apples turned the current
that threatened to carry him away. Ever and again a cycle, or a party of cyclists, would go by,with glittering wheels and softly running chains, and on each occasion, to save his
selfrespect, Mr. Hoopdriver descended and feigned some trouble with his saddle. Each time he
descended with less trepidation.
He did not reach Guildford until nearly four o’clock, and then he was so much exhausted
that he decided to put up there for the night, at the Yellow Hammer Coffee Tavern. And after
he had cooled a space and refreshed himself with tea and bread and butter and jam, — the
tea he drank noisily out of the saucer, — he went out to loiter away the rest of the afternoon.
Guildford is an altogether charming old town, famous, so he learnt from a Guide Book, as the
scene of Master Tupper’s great historical novel of Stephen Langton, and it has a delightful
castle, all set about with geraniums and brass plates commemorating the gentlemen who put
them up, and its Guildhall is a Tudor building, very pleasant to see, and in the afternoon the
shops are busy and the people going to and fro make the pavements look bright and
prosperous. It was nice to peep in the windows and see the heads of the men and girls in the
drapers’ shops, busy as busy, serving away. The High Street runs down at an angle of
seventy degrees to the horizon (so it seemed to Mr. Hoopdriver, whose feeling for gradients
was unnaturally exalted), and it brought his heart into his mouth to see a cyclist ride down it,
like a fly crawling down a window pane. The man hadn’t even a brake. He visited the castle
early in the evening and paid his twopence to ascend the Keep.
At the top, from the cage, he looked down over the clustering red roofs of the town and
the tower of the church, and then going to the southern side sat down and lit a Red Herring
cigarette, and stared away south over the old bramble-bearing, fern-beset ruin, at the waves
of blue upland that rose, one behind another, across the Weald, to the lazy altitudes of
Hindhead and Butser. His pale grey eyes were full of complacency and pleasurable
anticipation. Tomorrow he would go riding across that wide valley.
He did not notice any one else had come up the Keep after him until he heard a soft
voice behind him saying: “Well, MISS BEAUMONT, here’s the view.” Something in the accent
pointed to a jest in the name.
“It’s a dear old town, brother George,” answered another voice that sounded familiar
enough, and turning his head, Mr. Hoopdriver saw the other man in brown and the Young
Lady in Grey, with their backs towards him. She turned her smiling profile towards Hoopdriver.
“Only, you know, brothers don’t call their sisters —”
She glanced over her shoulder and saw Hoopdriver. “Damn!” said the other man in
brown, quite audibly, starting as he followed her glance.
Mr. Hoopdriver, with a fine air of indifference, resumed the Weald. “Beautiful old town,
isn’t it?” said the other man in brown, after a quite perceptible pause.
“Isn’t it?” said the Young Lady in Grey.
Another pause began.
“Can’t get alone anywhere,” said the other man in brown, looking round.
Then Mr. Hoopdriver perceived clearly that he was in the way, and decided to retreat. It
was just his luck of course that he should stumble at the head of the steps and vanish with
indignity. This was the third time that he’d seen HIM, and the fourth time her. And of course
he was too big a fat-head to raise his cap to HER! He thought of that at the foot of the Keep.
Apparently they aimed at the South Coast just as he did, He’d get up betimes the next day
and hurry off to avoid her — them, that is. It never occurred to Mr. Hoopdriver that Miss
Beaumont and her brother might do exactly the same thing, and that evening, at least, the
peculiarity of a brother calling his sister “Miss Beaumont” did not recur to him. He was much
too preoccupied with an analysis of his own share of these encounters. He found it hard to be
altogether satisfied about the figure he had cut, revise his memories as he would.
Once more quite unintentionally he stumbled upon these two people. It was about seven
o’clock. He stopped outside a linen draper’s and peered over the goods in the window at the
assistants in torment. He could have spent a whole day happily at that. He told himself that hewas trying to see how they dressed out the brass lines over their counters, in a purely
professional spirit, but down at the very bottom of his heart he knew better. The customers
were a secondary consideration, and it was only after the lapse of perhaps a minute that he
perceived that among them was — the Young Lady in Grey! He turned away from the window
at once, and saw the other man in brown standing at the edge of the pavement and regarding
him with a very curious expression of face.
There came into Mr. Hoopdriver’s head the curious problem whether he was to be
regarded as a nuisance haunting these people, or whether they were to be regarded as a
nuisance haunting him. He abandoned the solution at last in despair, quite unable to decide
upon the course he should take at the next encounter, whether he should scowl savagely at
the couple or assume an attitude eloquent of apology and propitiation.
Chapter 6 — The Imaginings of Mr. Hoopdriver’s Heart

Mr. Hoopdriver was (in the days of this story) a poet, though he had never written a line
of verse. Or perhaps romancer will describe him better. Like I know not how many of those
who do the fetching and carrying of life, — a great number of them certainly, — his real life
was absolutely uninteresting, and if he had faced it as realistically as such people do in Mr.
Gissing’s novels, he would probably have come by way of drink to suicide in the course of a
year. But that was just what he had the natural wisdom not to do. On the contrary, he was
always decorating his existence with imaginative tags, hopes, and poses, deliberate and yet
quite effectual self-deceptions; his experiences were mere material for a romantic
superstructure. If some power had given Hoopdriver the ‘giftie’ Burns invoked, ‘to see oursels
as ithers see us,’ he would probably have given it away to some one else at the very earliest
opportunity. His entire life, you must understand, was not a continuous romance, but a series
of short stories linked only by the general resemblance of their hero, a brown-haired young
fellow commonly, with blue eyes and a fair moustache, graceful rather than strong, sharp and
resolute rather than clever (cp., as the scientific books say, p. 2). Invariably this person
possessed an iron will. The stories fluctuated indefinitely. The smoking of a cigarette
converted Hoopdriver’s hero into something entirely worldly, subtly rakish, with a humorous
twinkle in the eye and some gallant sinning in the background. You should have seen Mr.
Hoopdriver promenading the brilliant gardens at Earl’s Court on an early-closing night. His
meaning glances! (I dare not give the meaning.) Such an influence as the eloquence of a
revivalist preacher would suffice to divert the story into absolutely different channels, make
him a white-soured hero, a man still pure, walking untainted and brave and helpful through
miry ways. The appearance of some daintily gloved frockcoated gentleman with buttonhole
and eyeglass complete, gallantly attendant in the rear of customers, served again to start
visions of a simplicity essentially Cromwell-like, of sturdy plainness, of a strong, silent man
going righteously through the world. This day there had predominated a fine leisurely person
immaculately clothed, and riding on an unexceptional machine, a mysterious person — quite
unostentatious, but with accidental self-revelation of something over the common, even a
“bloomin’ Dook,” it might be incognito, on the tour of the South Coast.
You must not think that there was any TELLING of these stories of this life-long series by
Mr. Hoopdriver. He never dreamt that they were known to a soul. If it were not for the trouble,
I would, I think, go back and rewrite this section from the beginning, expunging the statements
that Hoopdriver was a poet and a romancer, and saying instead that he was a playwright and
acted his own plays. He was not only the sole performer, but the entire audience, and the
entertainment kept him almost continuously happy. Yet even that playwright comparison
scarcely expresses all the facts of the case. After all, very many of his dreams never got
acted at all, possibly indeed, most of them, the dreams of a solitary walk for instance, or of a
tramcar ride, the dreams dreamt behind the counter while trade was slack and mechanical
foldings and rollings occupied his muscles. Most of them were little dramatic situations, crucial
dialogues, the return of Mr. Hoopdriver to his native village, for instance, in a well-cut holiday
suit and natty gloves, the unheard asides of the rival neighbours, the delight of the old ‘mater,’
the intelligence — “A ten-pound rise all at once from Antrobus, mater. Whad d’yer think of
that?” or again, the first whispering of love, dainty and witty and tender, to the girl he served a
few days ago with sateen, or a gallant rescue of generalised beauty in distress from truculent
insult or ravening dog.
So many people do this — and you never suspect it. You see a tattered lad selling
matches in the street, and you think there is nothing between him and the bleakness ofimmensity, between him and utter abasement, but a few tattered rags and a feeble
musculature. And all unseen by you a host of heaven — sent fatuities swathes him about,
even, maybe, as they swathe you about. Many men have never seen their own profiles or the
backs of their heads, and for the back of your own mind no mirror has been invented. They
swathe him about so thickly that the pricks of fate scarce penetrate to him, or become but a
pleasant titillation. And so, indeed, it is with all of us who go on living. Self-deception is the
anaesthetic of life, while God is carving out our beings.
But to return from this general vivisection to Mr. Hoopdriver’s imaginings. You see now
how external our view has been; we have had but the slightest transitory glimpses of the
drama within, of how the things looked in the magic mirror of Mr. Hoopdriver’s mind. On the
road to Guildford and during his encounters with his haunting fellow-cyclists the drama had
presented chiefly the quiet gentleman to whom we have alluded, but at Guildford, under more
varied stimuli, he burgeoned out more variously. There was the house agent’s window, for
instance, set him upon a charming little comedy. He would go in, make inquires about that
thirty-pound house, get the key possibly and go over it — the thing would stimulate the clerk’s
curiosity immensely. He searched his mind for a reason for this proceeding and discovered
that he was a dynamiter needing privacy. Upon that theory he procured the key, explored the
house carefully, said darkly that it might suit his special needs, but that there were OTHERS
to consult. The clerk, however, did not understand the allusion, and merely pitied him as one
who had married young and paired himself to a stronger mind than his own.
This proceeding in some occult way led to the purchase of a note-book and pencil, and
that started the conception of an artist taking notes. That was a little game Mr. Hoopdriver
had, in congenial company, played in his still younger days — to the infinite annoyance of
quite a number of respectable excursionists at Hastings. In early days Mr. Hoopdriver had
been, as his mother proudly boasted, a ‘bit of a drawer,’ but a conscientious and normally
stupid schoolmaster perceived the incipient talent and had nipped it in the bud by a series of
lessons in art. However, our principal character figured about quite happily in old corners of
Guildford, and once the other man in brown, looking out of the bay window of the Earl of Kent,
saw him standing in a corner by a gateway, note-book in hand, busily sketching the Earl’s
imposing features. At which sight the other man in brown started back from the centre of the
window, so as to be hidden from him, and crouching slightly, watched him intently through the
interstices of the lace curtains.
Chapter 7 — Omissions

Now the rest of the acts of Mr. Hoopdriver in Guildford, on the great opening day of his
holidays, are not to be detailed here. How he wandered about the old town in the dusk, and up
to the Hogsback to see the little lamps below and the little stars above come out one after
another; how he returned through the yellow-lit streets to the Yellow Hammer Coffee Tavern
and supped bravely in the commercial room — a Man among Men; how he joined in the talk
about flying-machines and the possibilities of electricity, witnessing that fiying-machines were
“dead certain to come,” and that electricity was “wonderful, wonderful”; how he went and
watched the billiard playing and said, “Left ‘em” several times with an oracular air; how he fell
a-yawning; and how he got out his cycling map and studied it intently, — are things that find
no mention here. Nor will I enlarge upon his going into the writing-room, and marking the road
from London to Guildford with a fine, bright line of the reddest of red ink. In his little cyclist
hand-book there is a diary, and in the diary there is an entry of these things — it is there to
this day, and I cannot do better than reproduce it here to witness that this book is indeed a
true one, and no lying fable written to while away an hour.
At last he fell a-yawning so much that very reluctantly indeed he set about finishing this
great and splendid day. (Alas! that all days must end at last!) He got his candle in the hall
from a friendly waiting-maid, and passed upward — whither a modest novelist, who writes for
the family circle, dare not follow. Yet I may tell you that he knelt down at his bedside, happy
and drowsy, and said, “Our Father ‘chartin’ heaven,” even as he had learnt it by rote from his
mother nearly twenty years ago. And anon when his breathing had become deep and regular,
we may creep into his bedroom and catch him at his dreams. He is lying upon his left side,
with his arm under the pillow. It is dark, and he is hidden; but if you could have seen his face,
sleeping there in the darkness, I think you would have perceived, in spite of that treasured,
thin, and straggling moustache, in spite of your memory of the coarse words he had used that
day, that the man before you was, after all, only a little child asleep.
Chapter 8 — The Dreams of Mr. Hoopdriver

In spite of the drawn blinds and the darkness, you have just seen Mr. Hoopdriver’s face
peaceful in its beauty sleep in the little, plain bedroom at the very top of the Yellow Hammer
Coffee Tavern at Guildford. That was before midnight. As the night progressed he was
disturbed by dreams.
After your first day of cycling one dream is inevitable. A memory of motion lingers in the
muscles of your legs, and round and round they seem to go. You ride through Dreamland on
wonderful dream bicycles that change and grow; you ride down steeples and staircases and
over precipices; you hover in horrible suspense over inhabited towns, vainly seeking for a
brake your hand cannot find, to save you from a headlong fall; you plunge into weltering
rivers, and rush helplessly at monstrous obstacles. Anon Mr. Hoopdriver found himself riding
out of the darkness of non-existence, pedalling Ezekiel’s Wheels across the Weald of Surrey,
jolting over the hills and smashing villages in his course, while the other man in brown cursed
and swore at him and shouted to stop his career. There was the Putney heath-keeper, too,
and the man in drab raging at him. He felt an awful fool, a — what was it? — a juggins, ah! —
a Juggernaut. The villages went off one after another with a soft, squashing noise. He did not
see the Young Lady in Grey, but he knew she was looking at his back. He dared not look
round. Where the devil was the brake? It must have fallen off. And the bell? Right in front of
him was Guildford. He tried to shout and warn the town to get out of the way, but his voice
was gone as well. Nearer, nearer! it was fearful! and in another moment the houses were
cracking like nuts and the blood of the inhabitants squirting this way and that. The streets
were black with people running. Right under his wheels he saw the Young Lady in Grey. A
feeling of horror came upon Mr. Hoopdriver; he flung himself sideways to descend, forgetting
how high he was, and forthwith he began falling; falling, falling.
He woke up, turned over, saw the new moon on the window, wondered a little, and went
to sleep again.
This second dream went back into the first somehow, and the other man in brown came
threatening and shouting towards him. He grew uglier and uglier as he approached, and his
expression was intolerably evil. He came and looked close into Mr. Hoopdriver’s eyes and
then receded to an incredible distance. His face seemed to be luminous. “MISS BEAUMONT,”
he said, and splashed up a spray of suspicion. Some one began letting off fireworks, chiefly
Catherine wheels, down the shop, though Mr. Hoopdriver knew it was against the rules. For it
seemed that the place they were in was a vast shop, and then Mr. Hoopdriver perceived that
the other man in brown was the shop-walker, differing from most shop-walkers in the fact that
he was lit from within as a Chinese lantern might be. And the customer Mr. Hoopdriver was
going to serve was the Young Lady in Grey. Curious he hadn’t noticed it before. She was in
grey as usual, — rationals, — and she had her bicycle leaning against the counter. She smiled
quite frankly at him, just as she had done when she had apologised for stopping him. And her
form, as she leant towards him, was full of a sinuous grace he had never noticed before.
“What can I have the pleasure?” said Mr. Hoopdriver at once, and she said, “The Ripley road.”
So he got out the Ripley road and unrolled it and showed it to her, and she said that would do
very nicely, and kept on looking at him and smiling, and he began measuring off eight miles by
means of the yard measure on the counter, eight miles being a dress length, a rational dress
length, that is; and then the other man in brown came up and wanted to interfere, and said
Mr. Hoopdriver was a cad, besides measuring it off too slowly. And as Mr. Hoopdriver began
to measure faster, the other man in brown said the Young Lady in Grey had been there long
enough, and that he WAS her brother, or else she would not be travelling with him, and hesuddenly whipped his arm about her waist and made off with her. It occurred to Mr.
Hoopdriver even at the moment that this was scarcely brotherly behaviour. Of course it
wasn’t! The sight of the other man gripping her so familiarly enraged him frightfully; he leapt
over the counter forthwith and gave chase. They ran round the shop and up an iron staircase
into the Keep, and so out upon the Ripley road. For some time they kept dodging in and out of
a wayside hotel with two front doors and an inn yard. The other man could not run very fast
because he had hold of the Young Lady in Grey, but Mr. Hoopdriver was hampered by the
absurd behaviour of his legs. They would not stretch out; they would keep going round and
round as if they were on the treadles of a wheel, so that he made the smallest steps
conceivable. This dream came to no crisis. The chase seemed to last an interminable time,
and all kinds of people, heathkeepers, shopmen, policemen, the old man in the Keep, the
angry man in drab, the barmaid at the Unicorn, men with flying-machines, people playing
billiards in the doorways, silly, headless figures, stupid cocks and hens encumbered with
parcels and umbrellas and waterproofs, people carrying bedroom candles, and such-like
riffraff, kept getting in his way and annoying him, although he sounded his electric bell, and
said, “Wonderful, wonderful!” at every corner...
Chapter 9 — How Mr. Hoopdriver Went to Haslemere

There was some little delay in getting Mr. Hoopdriver’s breakfast, so that after all he was
not free to start out of Guildford until just upon the stroke of nine. He wheeled his machine
from the High Street in some perplexity. He did not know whether this young lady, who had
seized hold of his imagination so strongly, and her unfriendly and possibly menacing brother,
were ahead of him or even now breakfasting somewhere in Guildford. In the former case he
might loiter as he chose; in the latter he must hurry, and possibly take refuge in branch roads.
It occurred to him as being in some obscure way strategic, that he would leave Guildford
not by the obvious Portsmouth road, but by the road running through Shalford. Along this
pleasant shady way he felt suffficiently secure to resume his exercises in riding with one hand
off the handles, and in staring over his shoulder. He came over once or twice, but fell on his
foot each time, and perceived that he was improving. Before he got to Bramley a specious
byway snapped him up, ran with him for half a mile or more, and dropped him as a terrier
drops a walkingstick, upon the Portsmouth again, a couple of miles from Godalming. He
entered Godalming on his feet, for the road through that delightful town is beyond dispute the
vilest in the world, a mere tumult of road metal, a way of peaks and precipices, and, after a
successful experiment with cider at the Woolpack, he pushed on to Milford.
All this time he was acutely aware of the existence of the Young Lady in Grey and her
companion in brown, as a child in the dark is of Bogies. Sometimes he could hear their
pneumatics stealing upon him from behind, and looking round saw a long stretch of vacant
road. Once he saw far ahead of him a glittering wheel, but it proved to be a workingman riding
to destruction on a very tall ordinary. And he felt a curious, vague uneasiness about that
Young Lady in Grey, for which he was altogether unable to account. Now that he was awake
he had forgotten that accentuated “Miss Beaumont that had been quite clear in his dream. But
the curious dream conviction, that the girl was not really the man’s sister, would not let itself
be forgotten. Why, for instance, should a man want to be alone with his sister on the top of a
tower? At Milford his bicycle made, so to speak, an ass of itself. A finger-post suddenly
jumped out at him, vainly indicating an abrupt turn to the right, and Mr. Hoopdriver would have
slowed up and read the inscription, but no! — the bicycle would not let him. The road dropped
a little into Milford, and the thing shied, put down its head and bolted, and Mr. Hoopdriver only
thought of the brake when the fingerpost was passed. Then to have recovered the point of
intersection would have meant dismounting. For as yet there was no road wide enough for Mr.
Hoopdriver to turn in. So he went on his way — or to be precise, he did exactly the opposite
thing. The road to the right was the Portsmouth road, and this he was on went to Haslemere
and Midhurst. By that error it came about that he once more came upon his fellow travellers
of yesterday, coming on them suddenly, without the slightest preliminary announcement and
when they least expected it, under the Southwestern Railway arch. “It’s horrible,” said a girlish
voice; “it’s brutal — cowardly —” And stopped.
His expression, as he shot out from the archway at them, may have been something
between a grin of recognition and a scowl of annoyance at himself for the unintentional
intrusion. But disconcerted as he waas, he was yet able to appreciate something of the
peculiarity of their mutual attitudes. The bicycles were Iying by the roadside, and the two
riders stood face to face. The other man in brown’s attitude, as it flashed upon Hoopdriver,
was a deliberate pose; he twirled his moustache and smiled faintly, and he was
conscientiously looking amused. And the girl stood rigid, her arms straight by her side, her
handkerchief clenched in her hand, and her face was flushed, with the faintest touch of red
upon her eyelids. She seemed to Mr. Hoopdriver’s sense to be indignant. But that was theimpression of a second. A mask of surprised recognition fell across this revelation of emotion
as she turned her head towards him, and the pose of the other man in brown vanished too in
a momentary astonishment. And then he had passed them, and was riding on towards
Haslemere to make what he could of the swift picture that had photographed itself on his
“Rum,” said Mr. Hoopdriver. “It’s DASHED rum!”
“They were having a row.”
“Smirking —” What he called the other man in brown need not trouble us.
“Annoying her!” That any human being should do that!
The impulse to interfere leapt suddenly into Mr. Hoopdriver’s mind. He grasped his
brake, descended, and stood looking hesitatingly back. They still stood by the railway bridge,
and it seemed to Mr. Hoopdriver’s fancy that she was stamping her foot. He hesitated, then
turned his bicycle round, mounted, and rode back towards them, gripping his courage firmly
lest it should slip away and leave him ridiculous. “I’ll offer ‘im a screw ‘ammer,” said Mr.
Hoopdriver. Then, with a wave of fierce emotion, he saw that the girl was crying. In another
moment they heard him and turned in surprise. Certainly she had been crying; her eyes were
swimming in tears, and the other man in brown looked exceedingly disconcerted. Mr.
Hoopdriver descended and stood over his machine.
“Nothing wrong, I hope?” he said, looking the other man in brown squarely in the face.
“No accident?”
“Nothing,” said the other man in brown shortly. “Nothing at all, thanks.”
“But,” said Mr. Hoopdriver, with a great effort, “the young lady is crying. I thought
perhaps —”
The Young Lady in Grey started, gave Hoopdriver one swift glance, and covered one eye
with her handkerchief. “It’s this speck,” she said. “This speck of dust in my eye.”
“This lady,” said the other man in brown, explaining, “has a gnat in her eye.”
There was a pause. The young lady busied herself with her eye. “I believe it’s out,” she
said. The other man in brown made movements indicating commiserating curiosity concerning
the alleged fly. Mr. Hoopdriver — the word is his own — stood flabber-gastered. He had all
the intuition of the simple-minded. He knew there was no fly. But the ground was suddenly cut
from his feet. There is a limit to knighterrantry — dragons and false knights are all very well,
but flies! Fictitious flies! Whatever the trouble was, it was evidently not his affair. He felt he
had made a fool of himself again. He would have mumbled some sort of apology; but the
other man in brown gave him no time, turned on him abruptly, even fiercely. “I hope,” he said,
“that your curiosity is satisfied?”
“Certainly,” said Mr. Hoopdriver.
“Then we won’t detain you.”
And, ignominiously, Mr. Hoopdriver turned his machine about, struggled upon it, and
resumed the road southward. And when he learnt that he was not on the Portsmouth road, it
was impossible to turn and go back, for that would be to face his shame again, and so he had
to ride on by Brook Street up the hill to Haslemere. And away to the right the Portsmouth road
mocked at him and made off to its fastnesses amid the sunlit green and purple masses of
Hindhead, where Mr. Grant Allen writes his Hill Top Novels day by day.
The sun shone, and the wide blue hill views and pleasant valleys one saw on either hand
from the sandscarred roadway, even the sides of the road itself set about with grey heather
scrub and prickly masses of gorse, and pine trees with their year’s growth still bright green,
against the darkened needles of the previous years, were fresh and delightful to Mr.
Hoopdriver’s eyes But the brightness of the day and the day-old sense of freedom fought an
uphill fight against his intolerable vexation at that abominable encounter, and had still to win it
when he reached Haslemere. A great brown shadow, a monstrous hatred of the other man inbrown, possessed him. He had conceived the brilliant idea of abandoning Portsmouth, or at
least giving up the straight way to his fellow-wayfarers, and of striking out boldly to the left,
eastward. He did not dare to stop at any of the inviting public-houses in the main street of
Haslemere, but turned up a side way and found a little beer-shop, the Good Hope, wherein to
refresh himself. And there he ate and gossipped condescendingly with an aged labourer,
assuming the while for his own private enjoyment the attributes of a Lost Heir, and afterwards
mounted and rode on towards Northchapel, a place which a number of finger-posts conspired
to boom, but which some insidious turning prevented him from attaining.
Chapter 10 — How Mr. Hoopdriver Reached Midhurst

It was one of my uncle’s profoundest remarks that human beings are the only
unreasonable creatures. This observation was so far justified by Mr. Hoopdriver that, after
spending the morning tortuously avoiding the other man in brown and the Young Lady in
Grey, he spent a considerable part of the afternoon in thinking about the Young Lady in Grey,
and contemplating in an optimistic spirit the possibilities of seeing her again. Memory and
imagination played round her, so that his course was largely determined by the windings of
the road he traversed. Of one general proposition he was absolutely convinced. “There’s
something Juicy wrong with ‘em,” said he — once even aloud. But what it was he could not
imagine. He recapitulated the facts. “Miss Beaumont — brother and sister — and the
stoppage to quarrel and weep — it was perplexing material for a young man of small
experience. There was no exertion he hated so much as inference, and after a time he gave
up any attempt to get at the realities of the case, and let his imagination go free. Should he
ever see her again? Suppose he did — with that other chap not about. The vision he found
pleasantest was an encounter with her, an unexpected encounter at the annual Dancing Class
‘Do’ at the Putney Assembly Rooms. Somehow they would drift together, and he would dance
with her again and again. It was a pleasant vision, for you must understand that Mr.
Hoopdriver danced uncommonly well. Or again, in the shop, a sudden radiance in the
doorway, and she is bowed towards the Manchester counter. And then to lean over that
counter and murmur, seemingly apropos of the goods under discussion, “I have not forgotten
that morning on the Portsmouth road,” and lower, “I never shall forget.”
At Northchapel Mr. Hoopdriver consulted his map and took counsel and weighed his
course of action. Petworth seemed a possible resting-place, or Pullborough; Midhurst seemed
too near, and any place over the Downs beyond, too far, and so he meandered towards
Petworth, posing himself perpetually and loitering, gathering wild flowers and wondering why
they had no names — for he had never heard of any — dropping them furtively at the sight of
a stranger, and generally ‘mucking about.’ There were purple vetches in the hedges,
meadowsweet, honeysuckle, belated brambles — but the dog-roses had already gone; there
were green and red blackberries, stellarias, and dandelions, and in another place white dead
nettles, traveller’s-joy, clinging bedstraw, grasses flowering, white campions, and ragged
robins. One cornfield was glorious with poppies, bright scarlet and purple white, and the blue
corn-flowers were beginning. In the lanes the trees met overhead, and the wisps of hay still
hung to the straggling hedges. Iri one of the main roads he steered a perilous passage
through a dozen surly dun oxen. Here and there were little cottages, and picturesque
beerhouses with the vivid brewers’ boards of blue and scarlet, and once a broad green and a
church, and an expanse of some hundred houses or so. Then he came to a pebbly rivulet that
emerged between clumps of sedge loosestrife and forget-me-nots under an arch of trees, and
rippled across the road, and there he dismounted, longing to take off shoes and stockings —
those stylish chequered stockings were now all dimmed with dust — and paddle his lean legs
in the chuckling cheerful water. But instead he sat in a manly attitude, smoking a cigarette, for
fear lest the Young Lady in Grey should come glittering round the corner. For the flavour of
the Young Lady in Grey was present through it all, mixing with the flowers and all the delight
of it, a touch that made this second day quite different from the first, an undertone of
expectation, anxiety, and something like regret that would not be ignored.
It was only late in the long evening that, quite abruptly, he began to repent, vividly and
decidedly, having fled these two people. He was getting hungry, and that has a curious effect
upon the emotional colouring of our minds. The man was a sinister brute, Hoopdriver saw in aflash of inspiration, and the girl — she was in some serious trouble. And he who might have
helped her had taken his first impulse as decisive — and bolted. This new view of it depressed
him dreadfully. What might not be happening to her now? He thought again of her tears.
Surely it was merely his duty, seeing the trouble afoot, to keep his eye upon it.
He began riding fast to get quit of such selfreproaches. He found himself in a tortuous
tangle of roads, and as the dusk was coming on, emerged, not at Petworth but at
Easebourne, a mile from Midhurst. “I’m getting hungry,” said Mr. Hoopdriver, inquiring of a
gamekeeper in Easebourne village. “Midhurst a mile, and Petworth five! — Thenks, I’ll take
He came into Midhurst by the bridge at the watermill, and up the North Street, and a little
shop flourishing cheerfully, the cheerful sign of a teapot, and exhibiting a brilliant array of
tobaccos, sweets, and children’s toys in the window, struck his fancy. A neat, bright-eyed little
old lady made him welcome, and he was presently supping sumptuously on sausages and
tea, with a visitors’ book full of the most humorous and flattering remarks about the little old
lady, in verse and prose, propped up against his teapot as he ate. Regular good some of the
jokes were, and rhymes that read well — even with your mouth full of sausage. Mr.
Hoopdriver formed a vague idea of drawing “something” — for his judgment on the little old
lady was already formed. He pictured the little old lady discovering it afterwards — “My
gracious! One of them Punch men,” she would say. The room had a curtained recess and a
chest of drawers, for presently it was to be his bedroom, and the day part of it was decorated
with framed Oddfellows’ certificates and giltbacked books and portraits, and kettle-holders,
and all kinds of beautiful things made out of wool; very comfortable it was indeed. The window
was lead framed and diamond paned, and through it one saw the corner of the vicarage and a
pleasant hill crest, in dusky silhouette against the twilight sky. And after the sausages had
ceased to be, he lit a Red Herring cigarette and went swaggering out into the twilight street.
All shadowy blue between its dark brick houses, was the street, with a bright yellow window
here and there and splashes of green and red where the chemist’s illumination fell across the
Chapter 11 — An Interlude

And now let us for a space leave Mr. Hoopdriver in the dusky Midhurst North Street, and
return to the two folks beside the railway bridge between Milford and Haslemere. She was a
girl of eighteen, dark, fine featured, with bright eyes, and a rich, swift colour under her
warmtinted skin. Her eyes were all the brighter for the tears that swam in them. The man was
thirty-three or four, fair, with a longish nose overhanging his sandy flaxen moustache, pale
blue eyes, and a head that struck out above and behind. He stood with his feet wide apart, his
hand on his hip, in an attitude that was equally suggestive of defiance and aggression. They
had watched Hoopdriver out of sight. The unexpected interruption had stopped the flood of
her tears. He tugged his abundant moustache and regarded her calmly. She stood with face
averted, obstinately resolved not to speak first. “Your behaviour,” he said at last, “makes you
She turned upon him, her eyes and cheeks glowing, her hands clenched. “You
unspeakable cad,” she said, and choked, stamped her little foot, and stood panting.
“Unspeakable cad! My dear girl! Possible I am an unspeakable cad. Who wouldn’t be —
for you?”
“‘Dear girl!’ How dare you speak to me like that? You—”
“I would do anything —”
There was a moment’s pause. She looked squarely into his face, her eyes alight with
anger and contempt, and perhaps he flushed a little. He stroked his moustache, and by an
effort maintained his cynical calm. “Let us be reasonable,” he said.
“Reasonable! That means all that is mean and cowardly and sensual in the world.”
“You have always had it so — in your generalising way. But let us look at the facts of the
case — if that pleases you better.”
With an impatient gesture she motioned him to go on.
“Well,” he said, — “you’ve eloped.”
“I’ve left my home,” she corrected, with dignity. “I left my home because it was
unendurable. Because that woman —”
“Yes, yes. But the point is, you have eloped with me.”
“You came with me. You pretended to be my friend. Promised to help me to earn a living
by writing. It was you who said, why shouldn’t a man and woman be friends? And now you
dare — you dare —”
“Really, Jessie, this pose of yours, this injured innocence —”
“I will go back. I forbid you — I forbid you to stand in the way —”
“One moment. I have always thought that my little pupil was at least clear-headed. You
don’t know everything yet, you know. Listen to me for a moment.”
“Haven’t I been listening? And you have only insulted me. You who dared only to talk of
friendship, who scarcely dared hint at anything beyond.”
“But you took the hints, nevertheless. You knew. You KNEW. And you did not mind.
MIND! You liked it. It was the fun of the whole thing for you. That I loved you, and could not
speak to you. You played with it —”
“You have said all that before. Do you think that justifies you?”
“That isn’t all. I made up my mind — Well, to make the game more even. And so I
suggested to you and joined with you in this expedition of yours, invented a sister at Midhurst
— I tell you, I haven’t a sister! For one object —”
“Well?”“To compromise you.”
She started. That was a new way of putting it. For half a minute neither spoke. Then she
began half defiantly: “Much I am compromised. Of course — I have made a fool of myself —”
“My dear girl, you are still on the sunny side of eighteen, and you know very little of this
world. Less than you think. But you will learn. Before you write all those novels we have talked
about, you will have to learn. And that’s one point —” He hesitated. “You started and blushed
when the man at breakfast called you Ma’am. You thought it a funny mistake, but you did not
say anything because he was young and nervous — and besides, the thought of being my
wife offended your modesty. You didn’t care to notice it. But — you see; I gave your name as
Mrs. Beaumont.” He looked almost apologetic, in spite of his cynical pose. “MRS. Beaumont,”
he repeated, pulling his flaxen moustache and watching the effect.
She looked into his eyes speechless. “I am learning fast,” she said slowly, at last.
He thought the time had come for an emotional attack. “Jessie,” he said, with a sudden
change of voice, “I know all this is mean, is villanous. But do you think that I have done all this
scheming, all this subterfuge, for any other object —”
She did not seem to listen to his words. “I shall ride home,” she said abruptly.
“To her?”
She winced.
“Just think,” said he, “what she could say to you after this.”
“Anyhow, I shall leave you now.”
“Yes? And go —”
“Go somewhere to earn my living, to be a free woman, to live without conventionality —”
“My dear girl, do let us be cynical. You haven’t money and you haven’t credit. No one
would take you in. It’s one of two things: go back to your stepmother, or — trust to me.”
“How can I?”
“Then you must go back to her.” He paused momentarily, to let this consideration have
its proper weight. “Jessie, I did not mean to say the things I did. Upon my honour, I lost my
head when I spoke so. If you will, forgive me. I am a man. I could not help myself. Forgive
me, and I promise you —”
“How can I trust you?”
“Try me. I can assure you —”
She regarded him distrustfully.
“At any rate, ride on with me now. Surely we have been in the shadow of this horrible
bridge long enough.”
“Oh! let me think,” she said, half turning from him and pressing her hand to her brow.
“Think! Look here, Jessie. It is ten o’clock. Shall we call a truce until one?”
She hesitated, demanded a definition of the truce, and at last agreed.
They mounted, and rode on in silence, through the sunlight and the heather. Both were
extremely uncomfortable and disappointed. She was pale, divided between fear and anger.
She perceived she was in a scrape, and tried in vain to think of a way of escape. Only one
tangible thing would keep in her mind, try as she would to ignore it. That was the quite
irrelevant fact that his head was singularly like an albino cocoanut. He, too, felt thwarted. He
felt that this romantic business of seduction was, after all, unexpectedly tame. But this was
only the beginning. At any rate, every day she spent with him was a day gained. Perhaps
things looked worse than they were; that was some consolation.
Chapter 12 — Of the Artificial in Man, and of the Zeitgeist

You have seen these two young people — Bechamel, by-the-bye, is the man’s name,
and the girl’s is Jessie Milton — from the outside; you have heard them talking; they ride now
side by side (but not too close together, and in an uneasy silence) towards Haslemere; and
this chapter will concern itself with those curious little council chambers inside their skulls,
where their motives are in session and their acts are considered and passed.
But first a word concerning wigs and false teeth. Some jester, enlarging upon the
increase of bald heads and purblind people, has deduced a wonderful future for the children of
men. Man, he said, was nowadays a hairless creature by forty or fifty, and for hair we gave
him a wig; shrivelled, and we padded him; toothless, and lo! false teeth set in gold. Did he lose
a limb, and a fine, new, artificial one was at his disposal; get indigestion, and to hand was
artificial digestive fluid or bile or pancreatine, as the case might be. Complexions, too, were
replaceable, spectacles superseded an inefficient eye-lens, and imperceptible false
diaphragms were thrust into the failing ear. So he went over our anatomies, until, at last, he
had conjured up a weird thing of shreds and patches, a simulacrum, an artificial body of a
man, with but a doubtful germ of living flesh lurking somewhere in his recesses. To that, he
held, we were coming.
How far such odd substitution for the body is possible need not concern us now. But the
devil, speaking by the lips of Mr. Rudyard Kipling, hath it that in the case of one Tomlinson,
the thing, so far as the soul is concerned, has already been accomplished. Time was when
men had simple souls, desires as natural as their eyes, a little reasonable philanthropy, a little
reasonable philoprogenitiveness, hunger, and a taste for good living, a decent, personal
vanity, a healthy, satisfying pugnacity, and so forth. But now we are taught and disciplined for
years and years, and thereafter we read and read for all the time some strenuous,
nervedestroying business permits. Pedagogic hypnotists, pulpit and platform hypnotists,
bookwriting hypnotists, newspaper-writing hypnotists, are at us all. This sugar you are eating, they
tell us, is ink, and forthwith we reject it with infinite disgust. This black draught of unrequited
toil is True Happiness, and down it goes with every symptom of pleasure. This Ibsen, they
say, is dull past believing, and we yawn and stretch beyond endurance. Pardon! they interrupt,
but this Ibsen is deep and delightful, and we vie with one another in an excess of
entertainment. And when we open the heads of these two young people, we find, not a
straightforward motive on the surface anywhere; we find, indeed, not a soul so much as an
oversoul, a zeitgeist, a congestion of acquired ideas, a highway’s feast of fine, confused
thinking. The girl is resolute to Live Her Own Life, a phrase you may have heard before, and
the man has a pretty perverted ambition to be a cynical artistic person of the very calmest
description. He is hoping for the awakening of Passion in her, among other things. He knows
Passion ought to awaken, from the text-books he has studied. He knows she admires his
genius, but he is unaware that she does not admire his head. He is quite a distinguished art
critic in London, and he met her at that celebrated lady novelist’s, her stepmother, and here
you have them well embarked upon the Adventure. Both are in the first stage of repentance,
which consists, as you have probably found for yourself, in setting your teeth hard and saying’
“I WILL go on.”
Things, you see, have jarred a little, and they ride on their way together with a certain
aloofness of manner that promises ill for the orthodox development of the Adventure. He
perceives he was too precipitate. But he feels his honour is involved, and meditates the
development of a new attack. And the girl? She is unawakened. Her motives are bookish,
written by a haphazard syndicate of authors, novelists, and biographers, on her whiteinexperience. An artificial oversoul she is, that may presently break down and reveal a human
being beneath it. She is still in that schoolgirl phase when a talkative old man is more
interesting than a tongue-tied young one, and when to be an eminent mathematician, say, or
to edit a daily paper, seems as fine an ambition as any girl need aspire to. Bechaniel was to
have helped her to attain that in the most expeditious manner, and here he is beside her,
talking enigmatical phrases about passion, looking at her with the oddest expression, and
once, and that was his gravest offence, offering to kiss her. At any rate he has apologised.
She still scarcely realises, you see, the scrape she has got into.
Chapter 13 — The Encounter at Midhurst

We left Mr. Hoopdriver at the door of the little tea, toy, and tobacco shop. You must not
think that a strain is put on coincidence when I tell you that next door to Mrs. Wardor’s — that
was the name of the bright-eyed, little old lady with whom Mr. Hoopdriver had stopped — is
the Angel Hotel, and in the Angel Hotel, on the night that Mr. Hoopdriver reached Midhurst,
were ‘Mr.’ and ‘Miss’ Beaumont, our Bechamel and Jessie Milton. Indeed, it was a highly
probable thing; for if one goes through Guildford, the choice of southward roads is limited; you
may go by Petersfield to Portsmouth, or by Midhurst to Chichester, in addition to which
highways there is nothing for it but minor roadways to Petworth or Pulborough, and cross-cuts
Brightonward. And coming to Midhurst from the north, the Angel’s entrance lies yawning to
engulf your highly respectable cyclists, while Mrs. Wardor’s genial teapot is equally attractive
to those who weigh their means in little scales. But to people unfamiliar with the Sussex roads
— and such were the three persons of this story — the convergence did not appear to be so
Bechamel, tightening his chain in the Angel yard after dinner, was the first to be aware of
their reunion. He saw Hoopdriver walk slowly across the gateway, his head enhaloed in
cigarette smoke, and pass out of sight up the street. Incontinently a mass of cloudy
uneasiness, that had been partly dispelled during the day, reappeared and concentrated
rapidly into definite suspicion. He put his screw hammer into his pocket and walked through
the archway into the street, to settle the business forthwith, for he prided himself on his
decision. Hoopdriver was merely promenading, and they met face to face.
At the sight of his adversary, something between disgust and laughter seized Mr.
Hoopdriver and for a moment destroyed his animosity. “‘Ere we are again!” he said, laughing
insincerely in a sudden outbreak at the perversity of chance.
The other man in brown stopped short in Mr. Hoopdriver’s way, staring. Then his face
assumed an expression of dangerous civility. “Is it any information to you,” he said, with
immense politeness, “when I remark that you are following us?”
Mr. Hoopdriver, for some occult reason, resisted his characteristic impulse to apologise.
He wanted to annoy.the other man in brown, and a sentence that had come into his head in a
previous rehearsal cropped up appropriately. “Since when,” said Mr. Hoopdriver, catching his
breath, yet bringing the question out valiantly, nevertheless, — “since when ‘ave you
purchased the county of Sussex?”
“May I point out,” said the other man in brown, “that I object — we object not only to your
proximity to us. To be frank — you appear to be following us — with an object.”
“You can always,” said Mr. Hoopdriver, “turn round if you don’t like it, and go back the
way you came.”
“Oh-o!” said the other man in brown. “THAT’S it! I thought as much.”
“Did you?” said Mr. Hoopdriver, quite at sea, but rising pluckily to the unknown occasion.
What was the man driving at?
“I see,” said the other man. “I see. I half suspected —” His manner changed abruptly to
a quality suspiciously friendly. “Yes — a word with you. You will, I hope, give me ten minutes.”
Wonderful things were dawning on Mr. Hoopdriver. What did the other man take him for?
Here at last was reality! He hesitated. Then he thought of an admirable phrase. “You ‘ave
some communication —”
“We’ll call it a communication,” said the other man.
“I can spare you the ten minutes,” said Mr. Hoopdriver, with dignity.
“This way, then,” said the other man in brown, and they walked slowly down the NorthStreet towards the Grammar School. There was, perhaps, thirty seconds’ silence. The other
man stroked his moustache nervously. Mr. Hoopdriver’s dramatic instincts were now fully
awake. He did not quite understand in what role he was cast, but it was evidently something
dark and mysterious. Doctor Conan Doyle, Victor Hugo, and Alexander Dumas were well
within Mr. Hoopdriver’s range of reading, and he had not read them for nothing.
“I will be perfectly frank with you,” said the other man in brown.
“Frankness is always the best course,” said Mr. Hoopdriver.
“Well, then — who the devil set you on this business?”
“Set me ON this business?”
“Don’t pretend to be stupid. Who’s your employer? Who engaged you for this job?”
“Well,” said Mr. Hoopdriver, confused. “No — I can’t say.”
“Quite sure?” The other man in brown glanced meaningly down at his hand, and Mr.
Hoopdriver, following him mechanically, saw a yellow milled edge glittering in the twilight. Now
your shop assistant is just above the tip-receiving class, and only just above it — so that he is
acutely sensitive on the point.
Mr. Hoopdriver flushed hotly, and his eyes were angry as he met those of the other man
in brown. “Stow it!” said Mr. Hoopdriver, stopping and facing the tempter.
“What!” said the other man in brown, surprised. “Eigh?” And so saying he stowed it in his
breeches pocket.
“D’yer think I’m to be bribed?” said Mr. Hoopdriver, whose imagination was rapidly
expanding the situation. “By Gosh! I’d follow you now —”
“My dear sir,” said the other man in brown, “I beg your pardon. I misunderstood you. I
really beg your pardon. Let us walk on. In your profession —”
“What have you got to say against my profession?”
“Well, really, you know. There are detectives of an inferior description — watchers. The
whole class. Private Inquiry — I did not realise — I really trust you will overlook what was,
after all — you must admit — a natural indiscretion. Men of honour are not so common in the
world — in any profession.”
It was lucky for Mr. Hoopdriver that in Midhurst they do not light the lamps in the summer
time, or the one they were passing had betrayed him. As it was, he had to snatch suddenly at
his moustache and tug fiercely at it, to conceal the furious tumult of exultation, the passion of
laughter, that came boiling up. Detective! Even in the shadow Bechamel saw that a laugh was
stifled, but he put it down to the fact that the phrase “men of honour” amused his interlocutor.
“He’ll come round yet,” said Bechamel to himself. “He’s simply holding out for a fiver.” He
“I don’t see that it hurts you to tell me who your employer is.”
“Don’t you? I do.”
“Prompt,” said Bechamel, appreciatively. “Now here’s the thing I want to put to you —
the kernel of the whole business. You need not answer if you don’t want to. There’s no harm
done in my telling you what I want to know. Are you employed to watch me — or Miss
“I’m not the leaky sort,” said Mr. Hoopdriver, keeping the secret he did not know with
immense enjoyment. Miss Milton! That was her name. Perhaps he’d tell some more. “It’s no
good pumping. Is that all you’re after?” said Mr. Hoopdriver.
Bechamel respected himself for his diplomatic gifts. He tried to catch a remark by
throwing out a confidence. “I take it there are two people concerned in watching this affair.”
“Who’s the other?” said Mr. Hoopdriver, calmly, but controlling with enormous internal
tension his selfappreciation. “Who’s the other?” was really brilliant, he thought.
“There’s my wife and HER stepmother.”
“And you want to know which it is?”
“Yes,” said Bechamel.“Well — arst ‘em!” said Mr. Hoopdriver, his exultation getting the better of him, and with
a pretty consciousness of repartee. “Arst ‘em both.”
Bechamel turned impatiently. Then he made a last effort. “I’d give a five-pound note to
know just the precise state of affairs,” he said.
“I told you to stow that,” said Mr. Hoopdriver, in a threatening tone. And added with
perfect truth and a magnificent mystery, “You don’t quite understand who you’re dealing with.
But you will!” He spoke with such conviction that he half believed that that defective office of
his in London — Baker Street, in fact — really existed.
With that the interview terminated. Bechamel went back to the Angel, perturbed. “Hang
detectives!” It wasn’t the kind of thing he had anticipated at all. Hoopdriver, with round eyes
and a wondering smile, walked down to where the mill waters glittered in the moonlight, and
after meditating over the parapet of the bridge for a space, with occasional murmurs of,
“Private Inquiry” and the like, returned, with mystery even in his paces, towards the town.


That glee which finds expression in raised eyebrows and long, low whistling noises was
upon Mr. Hoopdriver. For a space he forgot the tears of the Young Lady in Grey. Here was a
new game! — and a real one. Mr. Hoopdriver as a Private Inquiry Agent, a Sherlock Holmes
in fact, keeping these two people ‘under observation.’ He walked slowly back from the bridge
until he was opposite the Angel, and stood for ten minutes, perhaps, contemplating that
establishment and enjoying all the strange sensations of being this wonderful, this mysterious
and terrible thing. Everything fell into place in his scheme. He had, of course, by a kind of
instinct, assumed the disguise of a cyclist, picked up the first old crock he came across as a
means of pursuit. ‘No expense was to be spared.’
Then he tried to understand what it was in particular that he was observing. “My wife” —
“HER stepmother!” Then he remembered her swimming eyes. Abruptly came a wave of anger
that surprised him, washed away the detective superstructure, and left him plain Mr.
Hoopdriver. This man in brown, with his confident manner, and his proffered half sovereign
(damn him!) was up to no good, else why should he object to being watched? He was
married! She was not his sister. He began to understand. A horrible suspicion of the state of
affairs came into Mr. Hoopdriver’s head. Surely it had not come to THAT. He was a detective!
— he would find out. How was it to be done? He began to submit sketches on approval to
himself. It required an effort before he could walk into the Angel bar. “A lemonade and bitter,
please,” said Mr. Hoopdriver.
He cleared his throat. “Are Mr. and Mrs. Bowlong stopping here?”
“What, a gentleman and a young lady — on bicycles?”
“Fairly young — a married couple.”
“No,” said the barmaid, a talkative person of ample dimensions. “There’s no married
couples stopping here. But there’s a Mr. and Miss BEAUMONT.” She spelt it for precision.
“Sure you’ve got the name right, young man?”
“Quite,” said Mr. Hoopdriver.
“Beaumont there is, but no one of the name of — What was the name you gave?”
“Bowlong,” said Mr. Hoopdriver.
“No, there ain’t no Bowlong,” said the barmaid, taking up a glasscloth and a drying
tumbler and beginning to polish the latter. “First off, I thought you might be asking for
Beaumont — the names being similar. Were you expecting them on bicycles?”
“Yes — they said they MIGHT be in Midhurst tonight.”
“P’raps they’ll come presently. Beaumont’s here, but no Bowlong. Sure that Beaumont
ain’t the name?”
“Certain,” said Mr. Hoopdriver.“It’s curious the names being so alike. I thought p’raps —”
And so they conversed at some length, Mr. Hoopdriver delighted to find his horrible
suspicion disposed of. The barmaid having listened awhile at the staircase volunteered some
particulars of the young couple upstairs. Her modesty was much impressed by the young
lady’s costume, so she intimated, and Mr. Hoopdriver whispered the badinage natural to the
occasion, at which she was coquettishly shocked. “There’ll be no knowing which is which, in a
year or two,” said the barmaid. “And her manner too! She got off her machine and give it ‘im
to stick up against the kerb, and in she marched. ‘I and my brother,’ says she, ‘want to stop
here to-night. My brother doesn’t mind what kind of room ‘e ‘as, but I want a room with a good
view, if there’s one to be got,’ says she. He comes hurrying in after and looks at her. ‘I’ve
settled the rooms,’ she says, and ‘e says ‘damn!’ just like that. I can fancy my brother letting
me boss the show like that.”
“I dessay you do,” said Mr. Hoopdriver, “if the truth was known.”
The barmaid looked down, smiled and shook her head, put down the tumbler, polished,
and took up another that had been draining, and shook the drops of water into her little zinc
“She’ll be a nice little lot to marry,” said the barmaid. “She’ll be wearing the — well,
bdashes, as the sayin’ is. I can’t think what girls is comin’ to.”
This depreciation of the Young Lady in Grey was hardly to Hoopdriver’s taste.
“Fashion,” said he, taking up his change. “Fashion is all the go with you ladies — and
always was. You’ll be wearing ‘em yourself before a couple of years is out.”
“Nice they’d look on my figger,” said the barmaid, with a titter. “No — I ain’t one of your
fashionable sort. Gracious no! I shouldn’t feel as if I’d anything on me, not more than if I’d
forgot — Well, there! I’m talking.” She put down the glass abruptly. “I dessay I’m old
fashioned,” she said, and walked humming down the bar.
“Not you,” said Mr. Hoopdriver. He waited until he caught her eye, then with his native
courtesy smiled, raised his cap, and wished her good evening.


Then Mr. Hoopdriver returned to the little room with the lead-framed windows where he
had dined, and where the bed was now comfortably made, sat down on the box under the
window, stared at the moon rising on the shining vicarage roof, and tried to collect his
thoughts. How they whirled at first! It was past ten, and most of Midhurst was tucked away in
bed, some one up the street was learning the violin, at rare intervals a belated inhabitant
hurried home and woke the echoes, and a corncrake kept up a busy churning in the vicarage
garden. The sky was deep blue, with a still luminous afterglow along the hlack edge of the hill,
and the white moon overhead, save for a couple of yellow stars, had the sky to herself.
At first his thoughts were kinetic, of deeds and not relationships. There was this
malefactor, and his victim, and it had fallen on Mr. Hoopdriver to take a hand in the game. HE
was married. Did she know he was married? Never for a moment did a thought of evil
concerning her cross Hoopdriver’s mind. Simple-minded people see questions of morals so
much better than superior persons — who have read and thought themselves complex to
impotence. He had heard her voice, seen the frank light in her eyes, and she had been
weeping — that sufficed. The rights of the case he hadn’t properly grasped. But he would.
And that smirking — well, swine was the mildest for him. He recalled the exceedingly
unpleasant incident of the railway bridge. “Thin we won’t detain yer, thenks,” said Mr.
Hoopdriver, aloud, in a strange, unnatural, contemptible voice, supposed to represent that of
Bechamel. “Oh, the BEGGAR! I’ll be level with him yet. He’s afraid of us detectives — that I’ll
SWEAR.” (If Mrs. Wardor should chance to be on the other side of the door within earshot,
well and good.)For a space he meditated chastisements and revenges, physical impossibilities for the
most part, — Bechamel staggering headlong from the impact of Mr. Hoopdriver’s large, but,
to tell the truth, ill supported fist, Bechamel’s five feet nine of height lifted from the ground and
quivering under a vigorously applied horsewhip. So pleasant was such dreaming, that Mr.
Hoopdriver’s peaked face under the moonlight was transfigured. One might have paired him
with that well-known and universally admired triumph, ‘The Soul’s Awakening,’ so sweet was
his ecstasy. And presently with his thirst for revenge glutted by six or seven violent assaults, a
duel and two vigorous murders, his mind came round to the Young Lady in Grey again.
She was a plucky one too. He went over the incident the barmaid at the Angel had
described to him. His thoughts ceased to be a torrent, smoothed down to a mirror in which
she was reflected with infinite clearness and detail. He’d never met anything like her before.
Fancy that bolster of a barmaid being dressed in that way! He whuffed a contemptuous laugh.
He compared her colour, her vigour, her voice, with the Young Ladies in Business with whom
his lot had been cast. Even in tears she was beautiful, more beautiful indeed to him, for it
made her seem softer and weaker, more accessible. And such weeping as he had seen
before had been so much a matter of damp white faces, red noses, and hair coming out of
curl. Your draper’s assistant becomes something of a judge of weeping, because weeping is
the custom of all Young Ladies in Business, when for any reason their services are dispensed
with. She could weep — and (by Gosh!) she could smile. HE knew that, and reverting to
acting abruptly, he smiled confidentially at the puckered pallor of the moon.
It is difficult to say how long Mr. Hoopdriver’s pensiveness lasted. It seemed a long time
before his thoughts of action returned. Then he remembered he was a ‘watcher’; that
tomorrow he must be busy. It would be in character to make notes, and he pulled out his little
note-book. With that in hand he fell a-thinking again. Would that chap tell her the ‘tecks were
after them? If so, would she be as anxious to get away as HE was? He must be on the alert.
If possible he must speak to her. Just a significant word, “Your friend — trust me!” — It
occurred to him that to-morrow these fugitives might rise early to escape. At that he thought
of the time and found it was half-past eleven. “Lord!” said he, “I must see that I wake.” He
yawned and rose. The blind was up, and he pulled back the little chintz curtains to let the
sunlight strike across to the bed, hung his watch within good view of his pillow, on a nail that
supported a kettle-holder, and sat down on his bed to undress. He lay awake for a little while
thinking of the wonderful possibilities of the morrow, and thence he passed gloriously into the
wonderland of dreams.
Chapter 14 — The Pursuit

And now to tell of Mr. Hoopdriver, rising with the sun, vigilant, active, wonderful, the
practicable half of the lead-framed window stuck open, ears alert, an eye flickering incessantly
in the corner panes, in oblique glances at the Angel front. Mrs. Wardor wanted him to have his
breakfast downstairs in her kitchen, but that would have meant abandoning the watch, and he
held out strongly. The bicycle, cap-a-pie, occupied, under protest, a strategic position in the
shop. He was expectant by six in the morning. By nine horrible fears oppressed him that his
quest had escaped him, and he had to reconnoitre the Angel yard in order to satisfy himself.
There he found the ostler (How are the mighty fallen in these decadent days!) brushing down
the bicycles of the chase, and he returned relieved to Mrs. Wardor’s premises. And about ten
they emerged, and rode quietly up the North Street. He watched them until they turned the
corner of the post office, and then out into the road and up after them in fine style! They went
by the engine-house where the old stocks and the whipping posts are, and on to the
Chichester road, and he followed gallantly. So this great chase began.
They did not look round, and he kept them just within sight, getting down if he chanced to
draw closely upon them round a corner. By riding vigorously he kept quite conveniently near
them, for they made but little hurry. He grew hot indeed, and his knees were a little stiff to
begin with, but that was all. There was little danger of losing them, for a thin chalky dust lay
upon the road, and the track of her tire was milled like a shilling, and his was a chequered
ribbon along the way. So they rode by Cobden’s monument and through the prettiest of
villages, until at last the downs rose steeply ahead. There they stopped awhile at the only inn
in the place, and Mr. Hoopdriver took up a position which commanded the inn door, and
mopped his face and thirsted and smoked a Red Herring cigarette. They remained in the inn
for some time. A number of chubby innocents returning home from school, stopped and
formed a line in front of him, and watched him quietly but firmly for the space of ten minutes
or so. “Go away,” said he, and they only seemed quietly interested. He asked them all their
names then, and they answered indistinct murmurs. He gave it up at last and became passive
on his gate, and so at length they tired of him.
The couple under observation occupied the inn so long that Mr. Hoopdriver at the
thought of their possible employment hungered as well as thirsted. Clearly, they were
lunching. It was a cloudless day, and the sun at the meridian beat down upon the top of Mr.
Hoopdriver’s head, a shower bath of sunshine, a huge jet of hot light. It made his head swim.
At last they emerged, and the other man in brown looked back and saw him. They rode on to
the foot of the down, and dismounting began to push tediously up that long nearly vertical
ascent of blinding white road, Mr. Hoopdriver hesitated. It might take them twenty minutes to
mount that. Beyond was empty downland perhaps for miles. He decided to return to the inn
and snatch a hasty meal.
At the inn they gave him biscuits and cheese and a misleading pewter measure of sturdy
ale, pleasant under the palate, cool in the throat, but leaden in the legs, of a hot afternoon. He
felt a man of substance as he emerged in the blinding sunshine, but even by the foot of the
down the sun was insisting again that his skull was too small for his brains. The hill had gone
steeper, the chalky road blazed like a magnesium light, and his front wheel began an
apparently incurable squeaking. He felt as a man from Mars would feel if he were suddenly
transferred to this planet, about three times as heavy as he was wont to feel. The two little
black figures had vanished over the forehead of the hill. “The tracks’ll be all right,” said Mr.
That was a comforting reflection. It not only justified a slow progress up the hill, but at thecrest a sprawl on the turf beside the road, to contemplate the Weald from the south. In a
matter of two days he had crossed that spacious valley, with its frozen surge of green hills, its
little villages and townships here and there, its copses and cornfields, its ponds and streams
like jewelery of diamonds and silver glittering in the sun. The North Downs were hidden, far
away beyond the Wealden Heights. Down below was the little village of Cocking, and half-way
up the hill, a mile perhaps to the right, hung a flock of sheep grazing together. Overhead an
anxious peewit circled against the blue, and every now and then emitted its feeble cry. Up
here the heat was tempered by a pleasant breeze. Mr. Hoopdriver was possessed by
unreasonable contentment; he lit himself a cigarette and lounged more comfortably. Surely
the Sussex ale is made of the waters of Lethe, of poppies and pleasant dreams. Drowsiness
coiled insidiously about him.
He awoke with a guilty start, to find himself sprawling prone on the turf with his cap over
one eye. He sat up, rubbed his eyes, and realised that he had slept. His head was still a trifle
heavy. And the chase? He jumped to his feet and stooped to pick. up his overturned machine.
He whipped out his watch and saw that it was past two o’clock. “Lord love us, fancy that! —
But the tracks’ll be all right,” said Mr. Hoopdriver, wheeling his machine back to the chalky
road. “I must scorch till I overtake them.”
He mounted and rode as rapidly as the heat and a lingering lassitude permitted. Now and
then he had to dismount to examine the surface where the road forked. He enjoyed that
rather. “Trackin’,” he said aloud, and decided in the privacy of his own mind that he had a
wonderful instinct for ‘spoor.’ So he came past Goodwood station and Lavant, and
approached Chichester towards four o’clock. And then came a terrible thing. In places the
road became hard, in places were the crowded indentations of a recent flock of sheep, and at
last in the throat of the town cobbles and the stony streets branching east, west, north, and
south, at a stone cross under the shadow of the cathedral the tracks vanished. “O Cricky!”
said Mr. Hoopdriver, dismounting in dismay and standing agape. “Dropped anything?” said an
inhabitant at the kerb. “Yes,” said Mr. Hoopdriver, “I’ve lost the spoor,” and walked upon his
way, leaving the inhabitant marvelling what part of a bicycle a spoor might be. Mr. Hoopdriver,
abandoning tracking, began asking people if they had seen a Young Lady in Grey on a
bicycle. Six casual people hadn’t, and he began to feel the inquiry was conspicuous, and
desisted. But what was to be done?
Hoopdriver was hot, tired, and hungry, and full of the first gnawings of a monstrous
remorse. He decided to get himself some tea and meat, and in the Royal George he
meditated over the business in a melancholy frame enough. They had passed out of his world
— vanished, and all his wonderful dreams of some vague, crucial interference collapsed like a
castle of cards. What a fool he had been not to stick to them like a leech! He might have
thought! But there! — what WAS the good of that sort of thing now? He thought of her tears,
of her helplessness, of the bearing of the other man in brown, and his wrath and
disappointment surged higher. “What CAN I do?” said Mr. Hoopdriver aloud, bringing his fist
down beside the teapot.
What would Sherlock Holmes have done? Perhaps, after all, there might be such things
as clues in the world, albeit the age of miracles was past. But to look for a clue in this intricate
network of cobbled streets, to examine every muddy interstice! There was a chance by
looking about and inquiry at the various inns. Upon that he began. But of course they might
have ridden straight through and scarcely a soul have marked them. And then came a
positivelybrilliant idea. “‘Ow many ways are there out of Chichester?” said Mr. Hoopdriver. It
was really equal to Sherlock Holmes — that.” If they’ve made tracks, I shall find those tracks.
If not — they’re in the town.” He was then in East Street, and he started at once to make the
circuit of the place, discovering incidentally that Chichester is a walled city. In passing, he
made inquiries at the Black Swan, the Crown, and the Red Lion Hotel. At six o’clock in the
evening, he was walking downcast, intent, as one who had dropped money, along the roadtowards Bognor, kicking up the dust with his shoes and fretting with disappointed pugnacity. A
thwarted, crestfallen Hoopdriver it was, as you may well imagine. And then suddenly there
jumped upon his attention — a broad line ribbed like a shilling, and close beside it one
chequered, that ever and again split into two. “Found!” said Mr. Hoopdriver and swung round
on his heel at once, and back to the Royal George, helter skelter, for the bicycle they were
minding for him. The ostler thought he was confoundedly imperious, considering his machine.
Chapter 15 — At Bognor

That seductive gentleman, Bechamel, had been working up to a crisis. He had started
upon this elopement in a vein of fine romance, immensely proud of his wickedness, and really
as much in love as an artificial oversoul can be, with Jessie. But either she was the
profoundest of coquettes or she had not the slightest element of Passion (with a large P) in
her composition. It warred with all his ideas of himself and the feminine mind to think that
under their flattering circumstances she really could be so vitally deficient. He found her
persistent coolness, her more or less evident contempt for himself, exasperating in the
highest degree. He put it to himself that she was enough to provoke a saint, and tried to think
that was piquant and enjoyable, but the blisters on his vanity asserted themselves. The fact is,
he was, under this standing irritation, getting down to the natural man in himself for once, and
the natural man in himself, in spite of Oxford and the junior Reviewers’ Club, was a
Palaeolithic creature of simple tastes and violent methods. “I’ll be level with you yet,” ran like a
plough through the soil of his thoughts.
Then there was this infernal detective. Bechamel had told his wife he was going to Davos
to see Carter. To that he had fancied she was reconciled, but how she would take this exploit
was entirely problematical. She was a woman of peculiar moral views, and she measured
marital infidelity largely by its proximity to herself. Out of her sight, and more particularly out of
the sight of the other women of her set, vice of the recognised description was, perhaps,
permissible to those contemptible weaklings, men, but this was Evil on the High Roads. She
was bound to make a fuss, and these fusses invariably took the final form of a tightness of
money for Bechamel. Albeit, and he felt it was heroic of him to resolve so, it was worth doing if
it was to be done. His imagination worked on a kind of matronly Valkyrie, and the noise of
pursuit and vengeance was in the air. The idyll still had the front of the stage. That accursed
detective, it seemed, had been thrown off the scent, and that, at any rate, gave a night’s
respite. But things must be brought to an issue forthwith.
By eight o’clock in the evening, in a little dining-room in the Vicuna Hotel, Bognor, the
crisis had come, and Jessie, flushed and angry in the face and with her heart sinking, faced
him again for her last st,ruggle with him. He had tricked her this time, effectually, and luck had
been on his side. She was booked as Mrs. Beaumont. Save for her refusal to enter their
room, and her eccentricity of eating with unwashed hands, she had so far kept up the
appearances of things before the waiter. But the dinner was grim enough. Now in turn she
appealed to his better nature and made extravagant statements of her plans to fool him.
He was white and vicious by this time, and his anger quivered through his pose of brilliant
“I will go to the station,” she said. “I will go back —”
“The last train for anywhere leaves at 7.42.”
“I will appeal to the police —”
“You don’t know them.”
“I will tell these hotel people.”
“They will turn you out of doors. You’re in such a thoroughly false position now. They
don’t understand unconventionality, down here.”
She stamped her foot. “If I wander about the streets all night —” she said.
“You who have never been out alone after dusk? Do you know what the streets of a
charming little holiday resort are like —”
“I don’t care,” she said. “I can go to the clergyman here.”
“He’s a charming man. Unmarried. And men are really more alike than you think. Andanyhow —”
“How CAN you explain the last two nights to anyone now? The mischief is done, Jessie.”
“You CUR,” she said, and suddenly put her hand to her breast. He thought she meant to
faint, but she stood, with the colour gone from her face.
“No,” he said. “I love you.”
“Love!” said she.
“Yes — love.”
“There are ways yet,” she said, after a pause.
“Not for you. You are too full of life and hope yet for, what is it? — not the dark arch nor
the black flowing river. Don’t you think of it. You’ll only shirk it when the moment comes, and
turn it all into comedy.”
She turned round abruptly from him and stood looking out across the parade at the
shining sea over which the afterglow of day fled before the rising moon. He maintained his
attitude. The blinds were still up, for she had told the waiter not to draw them. There was
silence for some moments.
At last he spoke in as persuasive a voice as he could summon. “Take it sensibly, Jessie.
Why should we, who have so much in common, quarrel into melodrama? I swear I love you.
You are all that is bright and desirable to me. I am stronger than you, older; man to your
woman. To find YOU too — conventional!”
She looked at him over her shoulder, and he noticed with a twinge of delight how her little
chin came out beneath the curve of her cheek.
“MAN!” she said. “Man to MY woman! Do MEN lie? Would a MAN use his five and thirty
years’ experience to outwit a girl of seventeen? Man to my woman indeed! That surely is the
last insult!”
“Your repartee is admirable, Jessie. I should say they do, though — all that and more
also when their hearts were set on such a girl as yourself. For God’s sake drop this
shrewishness! Why should you be so — difficult to me? Here am I with MY reputation, MY
career, at your feet. Look here, Jessie — on my honour, I will marry you —”
“God forbid,” she said, so promptly that she never learnt he had a wife, even then. It
occurred to him then for the first time, in the flash of her retort, that she did not know he was
“‘Tis only a pre-nuptial settlement,” he said, following that hint.
He paused.
“You must be sensible. The thing’s your own doing. Come out on the beach now the
beach here is splendid, and the moon will soon be high.”
“I WON’T” she said, stamping her foot.
“Well, well —”
“Oh! leave me alone. Let me think —”
“Think,” he said, “if you want to. It’s your cry always. But you can’t save yourself by
thinking, my dear girl. You can’t save yourself in any way now. If saving it is — this parsimony
“Oh, go — go.”
“Very well. I will go. I will go and smoke a cigar. And think of you, dear... But do you think
I should do all this if I did not care?”
“Go,” she whispered, without glancing round. She continued to stare out of the window.
He stood looking at her for a moment, with a strange light in his eyes. He made a step
towards her. “I HAVE you,”, he said. “You are mine. Netted — caught. But mine.” He would
have gone up to her and laid his hand upon her, but he did not dare to do that yet. “I have you
in my hand,” he said, “in my power. Do you hear — POWER!”
She remained impassive. He stared at her for half a minute, and then, with a superbgesture that was lost upon her, went to the door. Surely the instinctive abasement of her sex
before Strength was upon his side. He told himself that his battle was won. She heard the
handle move and the catch click as the door closed behind him.


And now without in the twilight behold Mr. Hoopdriver, his cheeks hot, his eye bright! His
brain is in a tumult. The nervous, obsequious Hoopdriver, to whom I introduced you some
days since, has undergone a wonderful change. Ever since he lost that ‘spoor’ in Chichester,
he has been tormented by the most horrible visions of the shameful insults that may be
happening. The strangeness of new surroundings has been working to strip off the habitual
servile from him. Here was moonlight rising over the memory of a red sunset, dark shadows
and glowing orange lamps, beauty somewhere mysteriously rapt away from him, tangible
wrong in a brown suit and an unpleasant face, flouting him. Mr. Hoopdriver for the time, was
in the world of Romance and Knight-errantry, divinely forgetful of his social position or hers;
forgetting, too, for the time any of the wretched timidities that had tied him long since behind
the counter in his proper place. He was angry and adventurous. It was all about him, this vivid
drama he had fallen into, and it was eluding him. He was far too grimly in earnest to pick up
that lost thread and make a play of it now. The man was living. He did not pose when he
alighted at the cof ee tavern even, nor when he made his hasty meal.
As Bechamel crossed from the Vicuna towards the esplanade, Hoopdriver, disappointed
and exasperated, came hurrying round the corner from the Temperance Hotel. At the sight of
Bechamel, his heart jumped, and the tension of his angry suspense exploded into, rather than
gave place to, an excited activity of mind. They were at the Vicuna, and she was there now
alone. It was the occasion he sought. But he would give Chance no chance against him. He
went back round the corner, sat down on the seat, and watched Bechamel recede into the
dimness up the esplanade, before he got up and walked into the hotel entrance. “A lady cyclist
in grey,” he asked for, and followed boldly on the waiter’s heels. The door of the dining-room
was opening before he felt a qualm. And then suddenly he was nearly minded to turn and run
for it, and his features seemed to him to be convulsed.
She turned with a start, and looked at him with something between terror and hope in her
“Can I— have a few words — with you, alone?” said Mr. Hoopdriver, controlling his
breath with difficulty. She hesitated, and then motioned the waiter to withdraw.
Mr. Hoopdriver watched the door shut. He had intended to step out into the middle of the
room, fold his arms and say, “You are in trouble. I am a Friend. Trust me.” Instead of which
he stood panting and then spoke with sudden familiarity, hastily, guiltily: “Look here. I don’t
know what the juice is up, but I think there’s something wrong. Excuse my intruding — if it isn’t
so. I’ll do anything you like to help you out of the scrape — if you’re in one. That’s my
meaning, I believe. What can I do? I would do anything to help you.”
Her brow puckered, as she watched him make, with infinite emotion, this remarkable
speech. “YOU!” she said. She was tumultuously weighing possibilities in her mind, and he had
scarcely ceased when she had made her resolve.
She stepped a pace forward. “You are a gentleman,” she said.
“Yes,” said Mr. Hoopdriver.
“Can I trust you?”
She did not wait for his assurance. “I must leave this hotel at once. Come here.”
She took his arm and led him to the window.
“You can just see the gate. It is still open. Through that are our bicycles. Go down, get
them out, and I will come down to you. Dare you?
“Get your bicycle out in the road?”“Both. Mine alone is no good. At once. Dare you?”
“Which way?”
“Go out by the front door and round. I will follow in one minute.”
“Right!” said Mr. Hoopdriver, and went.
He had to get those bicycles. Had he been told to go out and kill Bechamel he would
have done it. His head was a MaeIstrom now. He walked out of the hotel, along the front, and
into the big, blackshadowed coach yard. He looked round. There were no bicycles visible.
Then a man emerged from the dark, a short man in a short, black, shiny jacket. Hoopdriver
was caught. He made no attempt to turn and run for it. “I’ve been giving your machines a wipe
over, sir,” said the man, recognising the suit, and touching his cap. Hoopdriver’s intelligence
now was a soaring eagle; he swooped on the situation at once. “That’s right,” he said, and
added, before the pause became marked, “Where is mine? I want to look at the chain.”
The man led him into an open shed, and went fumbling for a lantern. Hoopdriver moved
the lady’s machine out of his way to the door, and then laid hands on the man’s machine and
wheeled it out of the shed into the yard. The gate stood open and beyond was the pale road
and a clump of trees black in the twilight. He stooped and examined the chain with trembling
fingers. How was it to be done? Something behind the gate seemed to flutter. The man must
be got rid of anyhow.
“I say,” said Hoopdriver, with an inspiration, “can you get me a screwdriver?”
The man simply walked across the shed, opened and shut a box, and came up to the
kneeling Hoopdriver with a screwdriver in his hand. Hoopdriver felt himself a lost man. He took
the screwdriver with a tepid “Thanks,” and incontinently had another inspiration.
“I say,” he said again.
“This is miles too big.”
The man lit the lantern, brought it up to Hoopdriver and put it down on the ground. “Want
a smaller screwdriver?” he said.
Hoopdriver had his handkerchief out and sneezed a prompt ATICHEW. It is the orthodox
thing when you wish to avoid recognition. “As small as you have,” he said, out of his pocket
“I ain’t got none smaller than that,” said the ostler.
“Won’t do, really,” said Hoopdriver, still wallowing in his handkerchief.
“I’ll see wot they got in the ‘ouse, if you like, sir,” said the man. “If you would,” said
Hoopdriver. And as the man’s heavily nailed boots went clattering down the yard, Hoopdriver
stood up, took a noiseless step to the lady’s machine, laid trembling hands on its handle and
saddle, and prepared for a rush.
The scullery door opened momentarily and sent a beam of warm, yellow light up the
road, shut again behind the man, and forthwith Hoopdriver rushed the machines towards the
gate. A dark grey form came fluttering to meet him. “Give me this,” she said, “and bring
He passed the thing to her, touched her hand in the darkness, ran back, seized
Bechamel’s machine, and followed.
The yellow light of the scullery door suddenly flashed upon the cobbles again. It was too
late now to do anything but escape. He heard the ostler shout behind him, and came into the
road. She was up and dim already. He got into the saddle without a blunder. In a moment the
ostler was in the gateway with a full-throated “HI! sir! That ain’t allowed;” and Hoopdriver was
overtaking the Young Lady in Grey. For some moments the earth seemed alive with shouts
of, “Stop ‘em!” and the shadows with ambuscades of police. The road swept round, and they
were riding out of sight of the hotel, and behind dark hedges, side by side.
She was weeping with excitement as he overtook her. “Brave,” she said, “brave!” and he
ceased to feel like a hunted thief. He looked over his shoulder and about him, and saw thatthey were already out of Bognor — for the Vicuna stands at the very westernmost extremity
of the sea front — and riding on a fair wide road.


The ostler (being a fool) rushed violently down the road vociferating after them. Then he
returned panting to the Vicuna Hotel, and finding a group of men outside the entrance, who
wanted to know what was UP, stopped to give them the cream of the adventure. That gave
the fugitives five minutes. Then pushing breathlessly into the bar, he had to make it clear to
the barmaid what the matter was, and the ‘gov’nor’ being out, they spent some more precious
time wondering ‘what — EVER’ was to be done! in which the two customers returning from
outside joined with animation. There were also moral remarks and other irrelevant
contributions. There were conflicting ideas of telling the police and pursuing the flying couple
on a horse. That made ten minutes. Then Stephen, the waiter, who had shown Hoopdriver up,
came down and lit wonderful lights and started quite a fresh discussion by the simple question
“WHICH?” That turned ten minutes into a quarter of an hour. And in the midst of this
discussion, making a sudden and awestricken silence, appeared Bechamel in the hall beyond
the bar, walked with a resolute air to the foot of the staircase, and passed out of sight. You
conceive the backward pitch of that exceptionally shaped cranium? Incredulous eyes stared
into one another’s in the bar, as his paces, muffled by the stair carpet, went up to the landing,
turned, reached the passage and walked into the dining-room overhead.
“It wasn’t that one at all, miss,” said the ostler,”I’d SWEAR”
“Well, that’s Mr. Beaumont,” said the barmaid, “— anyhow.”
Their conversation hung comatose in the air, switched up by Bechamel. They listened
together. His feet stopped. Turned. Went out of the diningroom. Down the passage to the
bedroom. Stopped again.
“Poor chap!” said the barmaid. “She’s a wicked woman!”
“Sssh!” said Stephen.
After a pause Bechamel went back to the dining-room. They heard a chair creak under
him. Interlude of conversational eyebrows.
“I’m going up,” said Stephen, “to break the melancholy news to him.”
Bechamel looked up from a week-old newspaper as, without knocking, Stephen entered.
Bechamel’s face suggested a different expectation. “Beg pardon, sir,” said Stephen, with a
diplomatic cough.
“Well?” said Bechamel, wondering suddenly if Jessie had kept some of her threats. If so,
he was in for an explanation. But he had it ready. She was a monomaniac. “Leave me alone
with her,” he would say; “I know how to calm her.”
“Mrs. Beaumont,” said Stephen.
“Has gone.”
He rose with a fine surprise. “Gone!” he said with a half laugh.
“Gone, sir. On her bicycle.”
“On her bicycle! Why?”
“She went, sir, with Another Gentleman.”
This time Bechamel was really startled. “An — other Gentlemen! Who?”
“Another gentleman in brown, sir. Went into the yard, sir, got out the two bicycles, sir,
and went off, sir — about twenty minutes ago.”
Bechamel stood with his eyes round and his knuckle on his hips. Stephen, watching him
with immense enjoyment, speculated whether this abandoned husband would weep or curse,
or rush off at once in furious pursuit. But as yet he seemed merely stunned.
“Brown clothes?” he said. “And fairish?”“A little like yourself, sir — in the dark. The ostler, sir, Jim Duke —”
Bechamel laughed awry. Then, with infinite fervour, he said — But let us put in blank
cartridge — he said, “——!”
“I might have thought!”
He flung himself into the armchair.
“Damn her,” said Bechamel, for all the world like a common man. “I’ll chuck this infernal
business! They’ve gone, eigh?”
Well, let ‘em GO,” said Bechamel, making a memorable saying. “Let ‘em GO. Who
cares? And I wish him luck. And bring me some Bourbon as fast as you can, there’s a good
chap. I’ll take that, and then I’ll have another look round Bognor before I turn in.”
Stephen was too surprised to say anything but “Bourbon, sir?”
“Go on,” said Bechamel. “Damn you!”
Stephen’s sympathies changed at once. “Yessir,” he murmured, fumbling for the door
handle, and left the room, marvelling. Bechamel, having in this way satisfied his sense of
appearances, and comported himself as a Pagan should, so soon as the waiter’s footsteps
had passed, vented the cream of his feelings in a stream of blasphemous indecency. Whether
his wife or HER stepmother had sent the detective, SHE had evidently gone off with him, and
that little business was over. And he was here, stranded and sold, an ass, and as it were, the
son of many generations of asses. And his only ray of hope was that it seemed more
probable, after all, that the girl had escaped through her stepmother. In which case the
business might be hushed up yet, and the evil hour of explanation with his wife indefinitely
postponed. Then abruptly the image of that lithe figure in grey knickerbockers went frisking
across his mind again, and he reverted to his blasphemies. He started up in a gusty frenzy
with a vague idea of pursuit, and incontinently sat down again with a concussion that stirred
the bar below to its depths. He banged the arms of the chair with his fist, and swore again.
“Of all the accursed fools that were ever spawned,” he was chanting, “I, Bechamel —” when
with an abrupt tap and prompt opening of the door, Stephen entered with the Bourbon.
Chapter 16 — The Moonlight Ride

And so the twenty minutes’ law passed into an infinity. We leave the wicked Bechamel
clothing himself with cursing as with a garment, — the wretched creature has already
sufficiently sullied our modest but truthful pages, — we leave the eager little group in the bar
of the Vicuna Hotel, we leave all Bognor as we have left all Chichester and Midhurst and
Haslemere and Guildford and Ripley and Putney, and follow this dear fool of a Hoopdriver of
ours and his Young Lady in Grey out upon the moonlight road. How they rode! How their
hearts beat together and their breath came fast, and how every shadow was anticipation and
every noise pursuit! For all that flight Mr. Hoopdriver was in the world of Romance. Had a
policeman intervened because their lamps were not lit, Hoopdriver had cut him down and
ridden on, after the fashion of a hero born. Had Bechamel arisen in the way with rapiers for a
duel, Hoopdriver had fought as one to whom Agincourt was a reality and drapery a dream. It
was Rescue, Elopement, Glory! And she by the side of him! He had seen her face in shadow,
with the morning sunlight tangled in her hair, he had seen her sympathetic with that warm light
in her face, he had seen her troubled and her eyes bright with tears. But what light is there
lighting a face like hers, to compare with the soft glamour of the midsummer moon?
The road turned northward, going round through the outskirts of Bognor, in one place
dark and heavy under a thick growth of trees, then amidst villas again, some warm and
lamplit, some white and sleeping in the moonlight; then between hedges, over which they saw
broad wan meadows shrouded in a low-lying mist. They scarcely heeded whither they rode at
first, being only anxious to get away, turning once westward when the spire of Chichester
cathedral rose suddenly near them out of the dewy night, pale and intricate and high. They
rode, speaking little, just a rare word now and then, at a turning, at a footfall, at a roughness
in the road.
She seemed to be too intent upon escape to give much thought to him, but after the first
tumult of the adventure, as flight passed into mere steady riding his mind became an
enormous appreciation of the position. The night was a warm white silence save for the subtile
running of their chains. He looked sideways at her as she sat beside him with her ankles
gracefully ruling the treadles. Now the road turned westward, and she was a dark grey outline
against the shimmer of the moon; and now they faced northwards, and the soft cold light
passed caressingly over her hair and touched her brow and cheek.
There is a magic quality in moonshine; it touches all that is sweet and beautiful, and the
rest of the night is hidden. It has created the fairies, whom the sunlight kills, and fairyland
rises again in our hearts at the sight of it, the voices of the filmy route, and their faint,
soulpiercing melodies. By the moonlight every man, dull clod though he be by day, tastes
something of Endymion, takes something of the youth and strength of Enidymion, and sees
the dear white goddess shining at him from his Lady’s eyes. The firm substantial daylight
things become ghostly and elusive, the hills beyond are a sea of unsubstantial texture, the
world a visible spirit, the spiritual within us rises out of its darkness, loses something of its
weight and body, and swims up towards heaven. This road that was a mere rutted white dust,
hot underfoot, blinding to the eye, is now a soft grey silence, with the glitter of a crystal grain
set starlike in its silver here and there. Overhead, riding serenely through the spacious blue, is
the mother of the silence, she who has spiritualised the world, alone save for two attendant
steady shining stars. And in silence under her benign influence, under the benediction of her
light, rode our two wanderers side by side through the transfigured and transfiguring night.
Nowhere was the moon shining quite so brightly as in Mr. Hoopdriver’s skull. At the
turnings of the road he made his decisions with an air of profound promptitude (and quitehaphazard). “The Right,” he would say. Or again “The Left,” as one who knew. So it was that
in the space of an hour they came abruptly down a little lane, full tilt upon the sea. Grey beach
to the right of them and to the left, and a little white cottage fast asleep inland of a sleeping
fishing-boat. “Hullo!” said Mr. Hoopdriver, sotto voce. They dismounted abruptly. Stunted oaks
and thorns rose out of the haze of moonlight that was tangled in the hedge on either side.
“You are safe,” said Mr. Hoopdriver, sweeping off his cap with an air and bowing courtly.
“Where are we?”
“But WHERE?”
“Chichester Harbour.” He waved his arm seaward as though it was a goal.
“Do you think they will follow us?”
“We have turned and turned again.”
It seemed to Hoopdriver that he heard her sob. She stood dimly there, holding her
machine, and he, holding his, could go no nearer to her to see if she sobbed for weeping or
for want of breath. “What are we to do now?” her voice asked.
“Are you tired?” he asked.
“I will do what has to be done.”
The two black figures in the broken light were silent for a space. “Do you know,” she
said, “I am not afraid of you. I am sure you are honest to me. And I do not even know your
He was taken with a sudden shame of his homely patronymic. “It’s an ugly name,” he
said. “But you are right in trusting me. I would — I would do anything for you... This is
She caught at her breath. She did not care to ask why. But compared with Bechamel! —
“We take each other on trust,” she said. “Do you want to know — how things are with me?”
“That man,” she went on, after the assent of his listening silence, “promised to help and
protect me. I was unhappy at home — never mind why. A stepmother — Idle, unoccupied,
hindered, cramped, that is enough, perhaps. Then he came into my life, and talked to me of
art and literature, and set my brain on fire. I wanted to come out into the world, to be a human
being — not a thing in a hutch. And he —”
“I know,” said Hoopdriver.
“And now here I am —”
“I will do anything,” said Hoopdriver.
She thought. “You cannot imagine my stepmother. No! I could not describe her —”
“I am entirely at your service. I will help you with all my power.”
“I have lost an Illusion and found a Knight-errant.” She spoke of Bechamel as the Illusion.
Mr. Hoopdriver felt flattered. But he had no adequate answer.
“I’m thinking,” he said, full of a rapture of protective responsibility, “what we had best be
doing. You are tired, you know. And we can’t wander all night — after the day we’ve had.”
“That was Chichester we were near?” she asked.
“If,” he meditated, with a tremble in his voice, “you would make ME your brother, MISS
“We could stop there together —”
She took a minute to answer. “I am going to light these lamps,” said Hoopdriver. He bent
down to his own, and struck a match on his shoe. She looked at his face in its light, grave and
intent. How could she ever have thought him common or absurd?
“But you must tell me your name — brother,” she said,
“Er — Carrington,” said Mr. Hoopdriver, after a momentary pause. Who would be
Hoopdriver on a night like this?
“But the Christian name?”“Christian name? My Christian name. Well — Chris.” He snapped his lamp and stood up.
“If you will hold my machine, I will light yours,” he said.
She came round obediently and took his machine, and for a moment they stood face to
face. “My name, brother Chris,” she said, “is Jessie.”
He looked into her eyes, and his excitement seemed arrested. “JESSIE,” he repeated
slowly. The mute emotion of his face affected her strangely. She had to speak. “It’s not such a
very wonderful name, is it?” she said, with a laugh to break the intensity.
He opened his mouth and shut it again, and, with a sudden wincing of his features,
abruptly turned and bent down to open the lantern in front of her machine. She looked down
at him, almost kneeling in front of her, with an unreasonable approbation in her eyes. It was,
as I have indicated, the hour and season of the full moon.


Mr. Hoopdriver conducted the rest of that night’s journey with the same confident dignity
as before, and it was chiefly by good luck and the fact that most roads about a town converge
thereupon, that Chichester was at last attained. It seemed at first as though everyone had
gone to bed, but the Red Hotel still glowed yellow and warm. It was the first time Hoopdriver
bad dared the mysteries of a ‘first-class’ hotel.’ But that night he was in the mood to dare
“So you found your Young Lady at last,” said the ostler of the Red Hotel; for it chanced
he was one of those of whom Hoopdriver had made inquiries in the afternoon.
“Quite a misunderstanding,” said Hoopdriver, with splendid readiness. “My sister had
gone to Bognor. But I brought her back here. I’ve took a fancy to this place. And the
moonlight’s simply dee-vine.”
“We’ve had supper, thenks, and we’re tired,” said Mr. Hoopdriver. “I suppose you won’t
take anything, — Jessie?”
The glory of having her, even as a sister! and to call her Jessie like that! But he carried it
off splendidly, as he felt himself bound to admit. “Good-night, Sis,” he said, “and pleasant
dreams. I’ll just ‘ave a look at this paper before I turn in.” But this was living indeed! he told
So gallantly did Mr. Hoopdriver comport himself up to the very edge of the Most
Wonderful Day of all. It had begun early, you will remember, with a vigil in a little sweet stuff
shop next door to the Angel at Midhurst. But to think of all the things that had happened since
then! He caught himself in the middle of a yawn, pulled out his watch, saw the time was half
past eleven, and marched off, with a fine sense of heroism, bedward.
Chapter 17 — The Surbiton Interlude

And here, thanks to the glorious institution of sleep, comes a break in the narrative
again. These absurd young people are safely tucked away now, their heads full of glowing
nonsense, indeed, but the course of events at any rate is safe from any fresh developments
through their activities for the next eight hours or more. They are both sleeping healthily you
will perhaps be astonished to hear. Here is the girl — what girls are coming to nowadays only
Mrs. Lynn Linton can tell! — in company with an absolute stranger, of low extraction and
uncertain accent, unchaperoned and unabashed; indeed, now she fancies she is safe, she is,
if anything, a little proud of her own share in these transactions. Then this Mr. Hoopdriver of
yours, roseate idiot that he is! is in illegal possession of a stolen bicycle, a stolen young lady,
and two stolen names, established with them in an hotel that is quite beyond his means, and
immensely proud of himself in a somnolent way for these incomparable follies. There are
occasions when a moralising novelist can merely wring his hands and leave matters to take
their course. For all Hoopdriver knows or cares he may be locked up the very first thing
tomorrow morning for the rape of the cycle. Then in Bognor, let alone that melancholy vestige,
Bechamel (with whom our dealings are, thank Goodness! over), there is a Coffee Tavern with
a steak Mr. Hoopdriver ordered, done to a cinder long ago, his American-cloth parcel in a
bedroom, and his own proper bicycle, by way of guarantee, carefully locked up in the hayloft.
To-morrow he will be a Mystery, and they will be looking for his body along the sea front. And
so far we have never given a glance at the desolate home in Surbiton, familiar to you no doubt
through the medium of illustrated interviews, where the unhappy stepmother —
That stepmother, it must be explained, is quite well known to you. That is a little surprise
I have prepared for you. She is ‘Thomas Plantagenet,’ the gifted authoress of that witty and
daring book, “A Soul Untrammelled,” and quite an excellent woman in her way, — only it is
such a crooked way. Her real name is Milton. She is a widow and a charming one, only ten
years older than Jessie, and she is always careful to dedicate her more daring works to the
‘sacred memory of my husband’ to show that there’s nothing personal, you know, in the
matter. Considering her literary reputation (she was always speaking of herself as one I
martyred for truth,’ because the critics advertised her written indecorums in column long
‘slates’), — considering her literary reputation, I say, she was one of the most respectable
women it is possible to imagine. She furnished correctly, dressed correctly, had severe
notions of whom she might meet, went to church, and even at times took the sacrament in
some esoteric spirit. And Jessie she brought up so carefully that she never even let her read
“A Soul Untrammelled.” Which, therefore, naturally enough, Jessie did, and went on from that
to a feast of advanced literature. Mrs. Milton not only brought up Jessie carefully, but very
slowly, so that at seventeen she was still a clever schoolgirl (as you have seen her) and quite
in the background of the little literary circle of unimportant celebrities which ‘Thomas
Plantagenet’ adorned. Mrs. Milton knew Bechamel’s reputation of being a dangerous man; but
then bad men are not bad women, and she let him come to her house to show she was not
afraid — she took no account of Jessie. When the elopement came, therefore, it was a double
disappointment to her, for she perceived his hand by a kind of instinct. She did the correct
thing. The correct thing, as you know, is to take hansom cabs, regardless of expense, and
weep and say you do not know WHAT to do, round the circle of your confidential friends. She
could not have ridden nor wept more had Jessie been her own daughter — she showed the
properest spirit. And she not only showed it, but felt it.
Mrs. Milton, as a successful little authoress and still more successful widow of thirty-two,
— “Thomas Plantagenet is a charming woman,” her reviewers used to write invariably, even ifthey spoke ill of her, — found the steady growth of Jessie into womanhood an unmitigated
nuisance and had been willing enough to keep her in the background. And Jessie — who had
started this intercourse at fourteen with abstract objections to stepmothers — had been active
enough in resenting this. Increasing rivalry and antagonism had sprung up between them, until
they could engender quite a vivid hatred from a dropped hairpin or the cutting of a book with a
sharpened knife. There is very little deliberate wickedness in the world. The stupidity of our
selfishness gives much the same results indeed, but in the ethical laboratory it shows a
different nature. And when the disaster came, Mrs. Milton’s remorse for their gradual loss of
sympathy and her share in the losing of it, was genuine enough.
You may imagine the comfort she got from her friends, and how West Kensington and
Notting Hill and Hampstead, the literary suburbs, those decent penitentiaries of a once
Bohemian calling, hummed with the business, Her ‘Men’ — as a charming literary lady she
had, of course, an organised corps — were immensely excited, and were sympathetic;
helpfully energetic, suggestive, alert, as their ideals of their various dispositions required them
to be. “Any news of Jessie?” was the pathetic opening of a dozen melancholy but interesting
conversations. To her Men she was not perhaps so damp as she was to her women friends,
but in a quiet way she was even more touching. For three days, Wednesday that is, Thursday,
and Friday, nothing was heard of the fugitives. It was known that Jessie, wearing a patent
costume with buttonup skirts, and mounted on a diamond frame safety with Dunlops, and a
loofah covered saddle, had ridden forth early in the morning, taking with her about two pounds
seven shillings in money, and a grey touring case packed, and there, save for a brief note to
her stepmother, — a declaration of independence, it was said, an assertion of her Ego
containing extensive and very annoying quotations from “A Soul Untrammelled,” and giving no
definite intimation of her plans — knowledge ceased. That note was shown to few, and then
only in the strictest confidence.
But on Friday evening late came a breathless Man Friend, Widgery, a correspondent of
hers, who had heard of her trouble among the first. He had been touring in Sussex, — his
knapsack was still on his back, — and he testified hurriedly that at a place called Midhurst, in
the bar of an hotel called the Angel, he had heard from a barmaid a vivid account of a Young
Lady in Grey. Descriptions tallied. But who was the man in brown? “The poor, misguided girl! I
must go to her at once,” she said, choking, and rising with her hand to her heart.
“It’s impossible to-night. There are no more trains. I looked on my way.”
“A mother’s love,” she said. “I bear her that.”
“I know you do.” He spoke with feeling, for no one admired his photographs of scenery
more than Mrs. Milton. “it’s more than she deserves.”
“Oh, don’t speak unkindly of her! She has been misled.”
It was really very friendly of him. He declared he was only sorry his news ended there.
Should he follow them, and bring her back? He had come to her because he knew of her
anxiety. “It is good of you,” she said, and quite instinctively took and pressed his hand. “And to
think of that poor girl — tonight! It’s dreadful.” She looked into the fire that she had lit when he
came in, the warm light fell upon her dark purple dress, and left her features in a warm
shadow. She looked such a slight, frail thing to be troubled so. “We must follow her.” Her
resolution seemed magnificent. “I have no one to go with me.”
“He must marry her,” said the man.
“She has no friends. We have no one. After all — Two women. — So helpless.”
And this fair-haired little figure was the woman that people who knew her only from her
books, called bold, prurient even! Simply because she was great-hearted — intellectual. He
was overcome by the unspeakable pathos of her position.
“Mrs. Milton,” he said. “Hetty!”
She glanced at him. The overflow was imminent. “Not now,” she said, “not now. I must
find her first.”“Yes,” he said with intense emotion. (He was one of those big, fat men who feel deeply.)
“But let me help you. At least let me help you.”
“But can you spare time?” she said. “For me.”
“For you —”
“But what can I do? what can we do?”
“Go to Midhurst. Follow her on. Trace her. She was there on Thursday night, last night.
She cycled out of the town. Courage!” he said. “We will save her yet!”
She put out her hand and pressed his again.
“Courage!” he repeated, finding it so well received.
There were alarms and excursions without. She turned her back to the fire, and he sat
down suddenly in the big armchair, which suited his dimensions admirably. Then the door
opened, and the girl showed in Dangle, who looked curiously from one to the other. There was
emotion here, he had heard the armchair creaking, and Mrs. Milton, whose face was flushed,
displayed a suspicious alacrity to explain. “You, too,” she said, “are one of my good friends.
And we have news of her at last.”
It was decidedly an advantage to Widgery, but Dangle determined to show himself a man
of resource. In the end he, too, was accepted for the Midhurst Expedition, to the intense
disgust of Widgery; and young Phipps, a callow youth of few words, faultless collars, and
fervent devotion, was also enrolled before the evening was out. They would scour the country,
all three of them. She appeared to brighten up a little, but it was evident she was profoundly
touched. She did not know what she had done to merit such friends. Her voice broke a little,
she moved towards the door, and young Phipps, who was a youth of action rather than of
words, sprang and opened it — proud to be first.
“She is sorely troubled,” said Dangle to Widgery. “We must do what we can for her.”
“She is a wonderful woman,” said Dangle. “So subtle, so intricate, so many faceted. She
feels this deeply.”
Young Phipps said nothing, but he felt the more.
And yet they say the age of chivalry is dead!
But this is only an Interlude, introduced to give our wanderers time to refresh themselves
by good, honest sleeping. For the present, therefore, we will not concern ourselves with the
starting of the Rescue Party, nor with Mrs. Milton’s simple but becoming grey dress, with the
healthy Widgery’s Norfolk jacket and thick boots, with the slender Dangle’s energetic bearing,
nor with the wonderful chequerings that set off the legs of the golf-suited Phipps. They are
after us. In a little while they will be upon us. You must imagine as you best can the
competitive raidings at Midhurst of Widgery, Dangle, and Phipps. How Widgery was great at
questions, and Dangle good at inference, and Phipps so conspicuously inferior in everything
that he felt it, and sulked with Mrs. Milton most of the day, after the manner of your callow
youth the whole world over. Mrs. Milton stopped at the Angel and was very sad and charming
and intelligent, and Widgery paid the bill. in the afternoon of Saturday, Chichester was
attained. But by that time our fugitives — As you shall immediately hear.
Chapter 18 — The Awakening of Mr. Hoopdriver

Mr. Hoopdriver stirred on his pillow, opened his eyes, and, staring unmeaningly, yawned.
The bedclothes were soft and pleasant. He turned the peaked nose that overrides the
insufficient moustache, up to the ceiling, a pinkish projection over the billow of white. You
might see it wrinkle as he yawned again, and then became quiet. So matters remained for a
space. Very slowly recollection returned to him. Then a shock of indeterminate brown hair
appeared, and first one watery grey eye a-wondering, and then two; the bed upheaved, and
you had him, his thin neck projecting abruptly from the clothes he held about him, his face
staring about the room. He held the clothes about him, I hope I may explain, because his
night-shirt was at Bognor in an American-cloth packet, derelict. He yawned a third time,
rubbed his eyes, smacked his lips. He was recalling almost everything now. The pursuit, the
hotel, the tremulous daring of his entry, the swift adventure of the inn yard, the moonlight —
Abruptly he threw the clothes back and rose into a sitting position on the edge of the bed.
Without was the noise of shutters being unfastened and doors unlocked, and the passing of
hoofs and wheels in the street. He looked at his watch. Half-past six. He surveyed the
sumptuous room again.
“Lord!” said Mr. Hoopdriver. “It wasn’t a dream, after all.”
“I wonder what they charge for these Juiced rooms!” said Mr. Hoopdriver, nursing one
rosy foot.
He became meditative, tugging at his insufficient moustache. Suddenly he gave vent to a
noiseless laugh. “What a rush it was! Rushed in and off with his girl right under his nose.
Planned it well too. Talk of highway robbery! Talk of brigands Up and off! How juiced sold he
must be feeling It was a shave too — in the coach yard!”
Suddenly he became silent. Abruptly his eyebrows rose and his jaw fell. “I sa-a-ay!” said
Mr. Hoopdriver.
He had never thought of it before. Perhaps you will understand the whirl he had been in
overnight. But one sees things clearer in the daylight. “I’m hanged if I haven’t been and stolen
a blessed bicycle.”
“Who cares?” said Mr. Hoopdriver, presently, and his face supplied the answer.
Then he thought of the Young Lady in Grey again, and tried to put a more heroic
complexion on the business. But of an early morning, on an empty stomach (as with
characteristic coarseness, medical men put it) heroics are of a more difficult growth than by
moonlight. Everything had seemed exceptionally fine and brilliant, but quite natural, the
evening before.
Mr. Hoopdriver reached out his hand, took his Norfolk jacket, laid it over his knees, and
took out the money from the little ticket pocket. “Fourteen and six-half,” he said, holding the
coins in his left hand and stroking his chin with his right. He verified, by patting, the presence
of a pocketbook in the breast pocket. “Five, fourteen, six-half,” said Mr. Hoopdriver. “Left.”
With the Norfolk jacket still on his knees, he plunged into another silent meditation. “That
wouldn’t matter,” he said. “It’s the bike’s the bother.
“No good going back to Bognor.
“Might send it back by carrier, of course. Thanking him for the loan. Having no further
use —” Mr. Hoopdriver chuckled and lapsed into the silent concoction of a delightfully
impudent letter. “Mr. J. Hoopdriver presents his compliments.” But the grave note reasserted
“Might trundle back there in an hour, of course, and exchange them. MY old crock’s so
blessed shabby. He’s sure to be spiteful too. Have me run in, perhaps. Then she’d be in justthe same old fix, only worse. You see, I’m her Knight-errant. It complicates things so.”
His eye, wandering loosely, rested on the sponge bath. “What the juice do they want with
cream pans in a bedroom?” said Mr. Hoopdriver, en passant.
“Best thing we can do is to set out of here as soon as possible, anyhow. I suppose she’ll
go home to her friends. That bicycle is a juicy nuisance, anyhow. Juicy nuisance!”
He jumped to his feet with a sudden awakening of energy, to proceed with his toilet.
Then with a certain horror he remembered that the simple necessaries of that process were at
Bognor! “Lord!” he remarked, and whistled silently for a space. “Rummy go! profit and loss;
profit, one sister with bicycle complete, wot offers? — cheap for tooth and ‘air brush, vests,
night-shirt, stockings, and sundries.
“Make the best of it,” and presently, when it came to hair-brushing, he had to smooth his
troubled locks with his hands. It was a poor result. “Sneak out and get a shave, I suppose,
and buy a brush and so on. Chink again! Beard don’t show much.”
He ran his hand over his chin, looked at himself steadfastly for some time, and curled his
insufficient moustache up with some care. Then he fell a-meditating on his beauty. He
considered himself, three-quarter face, left and right. An expression of distaste crept over his
features. “Looking won’t alter it, Hoopdriver,” he remarked. “You’re a weedy customer, my
man. Shoulders narrow. Skimpy, anyhow.”
He put his knuckles on the toilet table and regarded himself with his chin lifted in the air.
“Good Lord!” he said. “What a neck! Wonder why I got such a thundering lump there.”
He sat down on the bed, his eye still on the glass. “If I’d been exercised properly, if I’d
been fed reasonable, if I hadn’t been shoved out of a silly school into a silly shop — But there!
the old folks didn’t know no better. The schoolmaster ought to have. But he didn’t, poor old
fool! — Still, when it comes to meeting a girl like this — It’s ‘ard.
“I wonder what Adam’d think of me — as a specimen. Civilisation, eigh? Heir of the ages!
I’m nothing. I know nothing. I can’t do anything — sketch a bit. Why wasn’t I made an artist?
“Beastly cheap, after all, this suit does look, in the sunshine.”
“No good, Hoopdriver. Anyhow, you don’t tell yourself any lies about it. Lovers ain’t your
game, — anyway. But there’s other things yet. You can help the young lady, and you will — I
suppose she’ll be going home — And that business of the bicycle’s to see to, too, my man.
Forward, Hoopdriver! If you ain’t a beauty, that’s no reason why you should stop and be
copped, is it?”
And having got back in this way to a gloomy kind of self-satisfaction, he had another
attempt at his hair preparatory to leaving his room and hurrying on breakfast, for an early
departure. While breakfast was preparing he wandered out into South Street and refurnished
himself with the elements of luggage again. “No expense to be spared,” he murmured,
disgorging the half-sovereign.
Chapter 19 — The Departure From Chichester

He caused his ‘sister’ to be called repeatedly, and when she came down, explained with
a humorous smile his legal relationship to the bicycle in the yard. “Might be disagreeable, y’
know.” His anxiety was obvious enough. “Very well,” she said (quite friendly); “hurry breakfast,
and we’ll ride out. I want to talk things over with you.” The girl seemed more beautiful than
ever after the night’s sleep; her hair in comely dark waves from her forehead, her
ungauntleted finger-tips pink and cool. And how decided she was! Breakfast was a nervous
ceremony, conversation fraternal but thin; the waiter overawed him, and he was cowed by a
multiplicity of forks. But she called him “Chris.” They discussed their route over his sixpenny
county map for the sake of talking, but avoided a decision in the presence of the attendant.
The five-pound note was changed for the bill, and through Hoopdriver’s determination to be
quite the gentleman, the waiter and chambermaid got half a crown each and the ostler a
florin. “‘Olidays,” said the ostler to himself, without gratitude. The public mounting of the
bicycles in the street was a moment of trepidation. A policeman actually stopped and watched
them from the opposite kerb. Suppose him to come across and ask: “Is that your bicycle, sir?”
Fight? Or drop it and run? It was a time of bewildering apprehension, too, going through the
streets of the town, so that a milk cart barely escaped destruction under Mr. Hoopdriver’s
chancy wheel. That recalled him to a sense of erratic steering, and he pulled himself together.
In the lanes he breathed freer, and a less formal conversation presently began.
“You’ve ridden out of Chichester in a great hurry,” said Jessie.
“Well, the fact of it is, I’m worried, just a little bit. About this machine.”
“Of course,” she said. “I had forgotten that. But where are we going?”
“Jest a turning or two more, if you don’t mind,” said Hoopdriver.
“Jest a mile or so. I have to think of you, you know. I should feel more easy. If we was
locked up, you know — Not that I should mind on my own account —”
They rode with a streaky, grey sea coming and going on their left hand. Every mile they
put between themselves and Chichester Mr. Hoopdriver felt a little less conscience-stricken,
and a little more of the gallant desperado. Here he was riding on a splendid machine with a
Slap-up girl beside him. What would they think of it in the Emporium if any of them were to
see him? He imagined in detail the astonishment of Miss Isaacs and of Miss Howe. “Why! It’s
Mr. Hoopdriver,” Miss Isaacs would say. “Never!” emphatically from Miss Howe. Then he
played with Briggs, and then tried the ‘G.V.’ in a shay. “Fancy introducing ‘em to her — My
sister pro tem.” He was her brother Chris — Chris what? — Confound it! Harringon,
Hartington — something like that. Have to keep off that topic until he could remember. Wish
he’d told her the truth now — almost. He glanced at her. She was riding with her eyes straight
ahead of her. Thinking. A little perplexed, perhaps, she seemed. He noticed how well she rode
and that she rode with her lips closed — a thing he could never manage.
Mr. Hoopdriver’s mind came round to the future. What was she going to do? What were
they both going to do? His thoughts took a graver colour. He had rescued her. This was fine,
manly rescue work he was engaged upon. She ought to go home, in spite of that stepmother.
He must insist gravely but firmly upon that. She was the spirited sort, of course, but still —
Wonder if she had any money? Wonder what the second-class fare from Havant to London
is? Of course he would have to pay that — it was the regular thing, he being a gentleman.
Then should he take her home? He began to rough in a moving sketch of the return. The
stepmother, repentant of her indescribable cruelties, would be present, — even these rich
people have their troubles, — probably an uncle or two. The footman would announce, Mr. —
(bother that name!) and Miss Milton. Then two women weeping together, and a knightly figurein the background dressed in a handsome Norfolk jacket, still conspicuously new. He would
conceal his feeling until the very end. Then, leaving, he would pause in the doorway in such an
attitude as Mr. George Alexander might assume, and say, slowly and dwindlingly: “Be kind to
her — be kind to her,” and so depart, heartbroken to the meanest intelligence. But that was a
matter for the future. He would have to begin discussing the return soon. There was no traffic
along the road, and he came up beside her (he had fallen behind in his musing). She began to
talk. “Mr. Denison,” she began, and then, doubtfully, “That is your name? I’m very stupid —”
“It is,” said Mr. Hoopdriver. (Denison, was it? Denison, Denison, Denison. What was she
“I wonder how far you are willing to help me?” Confoundedly hard to answer a question
like that on the spur of the moment, without steering wildly. “You may rely —” said Mr.
Hoopdriver, recovering from a violent wabble. “I can assure you — I want to help you very
much. Don’t consider me at all. Leastways, consider me entirely at your service.” (Nuisance
not to be able to say this kind of thing right.)
“You see, I am so awkwardly situated.”
“If I can only help you — you will make me very happy —” There was a pause. Round a
bend in the road they came upon a grassy space between hedge and road, set with yarrow
and meadowsweet, where a felled tree lay among the green. There she dismounted, and
propping her machine against a stone, sat down. “Here, we can talk,” she said.
“Yes,” said Mr. Hoopdriver, expectant.
She answered after a little while, sitting, elbow on knee, with her chin in her hand, and
looking straight in front of her. “I don’t know — I am resolved to Live my Own Life.”
“Of course,” said Mr. Hoopdriver. “Naturally.”
“I want to Live, and I want to see what life means. I want to learn. Everyone is hurrying
me, everything is hurrying me; I want time to think.”
Mr. Hoopdriver was puzzled, but admiring. It was wonderful how clear and ready her
words were. But then one might speak well with a throat and lips like that. He knew he was
inadequate, but he tried to meet the occasion. “If you let them rush you into anything you
might repent of, of course you’d be very silly.”
“Don’t you want to learn?” she asked.
“I was wondering only this morning,” he began, and stopped.
She was too intent upon her own thoughts to notice this insufficiency. “I find myself in
life, and it terrifies me. I seem to be like a little speck, whirling on a wheel, suddenly caught
up. ‘What am I here for?’ I ask. Simply to be here at a time — I asked it a week ago, I asked it
yesterday, and I ask it to-day. And little things happen and the days pass. My stepmother
takes me shopping, people come to tea, there is a new play to pass the time, or a concert, or
a novel. The wheels of the world go on turning, turning. It is horrible. I want to do a miracle
like Joshua and stop the whirl until I have fought it out. At home — It’s impossible.”
Mr. Hoopdriver stroked his moustache. “It is so,” he said in a meditative tone. “Things will
go on,” he said. The faint breath of summer stirred the trees, and a bunch of dandelion puff
lifted among the meadowsweet and struck and broke into a dozen separate threads against
his knee. They flew on apart, and sank, as the breeze fell, among the grass: some to
germinate, some to perish. His eye followed them until they had vanished.
“I can’t go back to Surbiton,” said the Young Lady in Grey.
“Eigh?” said Mr. Hoopdriver, catching at his moustache. This was an unexpected
“I want to write, you see,” said the Young Lady in Grey, “to write Books and alter things.
To do Good. I want to lead a Free Life and Own myself. I can’t go back. I want to obtain a
position as a journalist. I have been told — But I know no one to help me at once. No one that
I could go to. There is one person — She was a mistress at my school. If I could write to her
— But then, how could I get her answer?”“H’mp,” said Mr. Hoopdriver, very grave.
“I can’t trouble you much more. You have come — you have risked things —”
“That don’t count,” said Mr. Hoopdriver. “It’s double pay to let me do it, so to speak.”
“It is good of you to say that. Surbiton is so Conventional. I am resolved to be
Unconventional — at any cost. But we are so hampered. If I could only burgeon out of all that
hinders me! I want to struggle, to take my place in the world. I want to be my own mistress, to
shape my own career. But my stepmother objects so. She does as she likes herself, and is
strict with me to ease her conscience. And if I go back now, go back owning myself beaten —”
She left the rest to his imagination.
“I see that,” agreed Mr. Hoopdriver. He must help her. Within his skull he was doing
some intricate arithmetic with five pounds six and twopence. In some vague way he inferred
from all this that Jessie was trying to escape from an undesirable marriage, but was saying
these things out of modesty. His circle of ideas was so limited.
“You know, Mr. — I’ve forgotten your name again.”
Mr. Hoopdriver seemed lost in abstraction. “You can’t go back of course, quite like that,”
he said thoughtfully. His ears waxed suddenly red and his cheeks flushed.
“But what is your name?”
“Name!” said Mr. Hoopdriver. “Why! — Benson, of course.”
“Mr. Benson — yes it’s really very stupid of me. But I can never remember names. I
must make a note on my cuff.” She clicked a little silver pencil and wrote the name down. “If I
could write to my friend. I believe she would be able to help me to an independent life. I could
write to her — or telegraph. Write, I think. I could scarcely explain in a telegram. I know she
would help me.”
Clearly there was only one course open to a gentleman under the circumstances. “In that
case,” said Mr. Hoopdriver, “if you don’t mind trusting yourself to a stranger, we might
continue as we are perhaps. For a day or so. Until you heard.” (Suppose thirty shillings a day,
that gives four days, say four thirties is hun’ and twenty, six quid, — well, three days, say; four
“You are very good to me.”
His expression was eloquent.
“Very well, then, and thank you. It’s wonderful — it’s more than I deserve that you —”
She dropped the theme abruptly. “What was our bill at Chichester?”
“Eigh?” said Mr. Hoopdriver, feigning a certain stupidity. There was a brief discussion.
Secretly he was delighted at her insistence in paying. She carried her point. Their talk came
round to their immediate plans for the day. They decided to ride easily, through Havant, and
stop, perhaps, at Fareham or Southampton. For the previous day had tried them both.
Holding the map extended on his knee, Mr. Hoopdriver’s eye fell by chance on the bicycle at
his feet. “That bicycle,” he remarked, quite irrelevantly, “wouldn’t look the same machine if I
got a big, double Elarum instead of that little bell.”
“Jest a thought.” A pause.
“Very well, then, — Havant and lunch,” said Jessie, rising.
“I wish, somehow, we could have managed it without stealing that machine,” said
Hoopdriver. “Because it IS stealing it, you know, come to think of it.”
“Nonsense. If Mr. Bechamel troubles you — I will tell the whole world — if need be.”
“I believe you would,” said Mr. Hoopdriver, admiring her. “You’re plucky enough —
goodness knows.”
Discovering suddenly that she was standing, he, too, rose and picked up her machine.
She took it and wheeled it into the road. Then he took his own. He paused, regarding it. “I
say!” said he. “How’d this bike look, now, if it was enamelled grey?” She looked over her
shoulder at his grave face. “Why try and hide it in that way?”“It was jest a passing thought,” said Mr. Hoopdriver, airily. “Didn’t MEAN anything, you
As they were riding on to Havant it occurred to Mr. Hoopdriver in a transitory manner
that the interview had been quite other than his expectation. But that was the way with
everything in Mr. Hoopdriver’s experience. And though his Wisdom looked grave within him,
and Caution was chinking coins, and an ancient prejudice in favour of Property shook her
head, something else was there too, shouting in his mind to drown all these saner
considerations, the intoxicating thought of riding beside Her all to-day, all to-morrow, perhaps
for other days after that. Of talking to her familiarly, being brother of all her slender strength
and freshness, of having a golden, real, and wonderful time beyond all his imaginings. His old
familiar fancyings gave place to anticipations as impalpable and fluctuating and beautiful as
the sunset of a summer day.
At Havant he took an opportunity to purchase, at small hairdresser’s in the main street, a
toothbrush, pair of nail scissors, and a little bottle of stuff to darken the moustache, an article
the shopman introduced to his attention, recommended highly, and sold in the excitement of
the occasion.
Chapter 20 — The Unexpected Anecdote of the Lion

They rode on to Cosham and lunched lightly but expensively there. Jessie went out and
posted her letter to her school friend. Then the green height of Portsdown Hill tempted them,
and leaving their machines in the village they clambered up the slope to the silent red-brick
fort that crowned it. Thence they had a view of Portsmouth and its cluster of sister towns, the
crowded narrows of the harbour, the Solent and the Isle of Wight like a blue cloud through the
hot haze. Jessie by some miracle had become a skirted woman in the Cosham inn. Mr.
Hoopdriver lounged gracefully on the turf, smoked a Red Herring cigarette, and lazily regarded
the fortified towns that spread like a map away there, the inner line of defence like toy
fortifications, a mile off perhaps; and beyond that a few little fields and then the beginnings of
Landport suburb and the smoky cluster of the multitudinous houses. To the right at the head
of the harbour shallows the town of Porchester rose among the trees. Mr. Hoopdriver’s
anxiety receded to some remote corner of his brain and that florid half-voluntary imagination
of his shared the stage with the image of Jessie. He began to speculate on the impression he
was creating. He took stock of his suit in a more optimistic spirit, and reviewed, with some
complacency, his actions for the last four and twenty hours. Then he was dashed at the
thought of her infinite perfections.
She had been observing him quietly, rather more closely during the last hour or so. She
did not look at him directly because he seemed always looking at her. Her own troubles had
quieted down a little, and her curiosity about the chivalrous, worshipping, but singular
gentleman in brown, was awakening. She had recalled, too, the curious incident of their first
encounter. She found him hard to explain to herself. You must understand that her knowledge
of the world was rather less than nothing, having been obtained entirely from books. You must
not take a certain ignorance for foolishness.
She had begun with a few experiments. He did not know French except ‘sivver play,’ a
phrase he seemed to regard as a very good light table joke in itself. His English was uncertain,
but not such as books informed her distinguished the lower classes. His manners seemed to
her good on the whole, but a trifle over-respectful and out of fashion. He called her I Madam’
once. He seemed a person of means and leisure, but he knew nothing of recent concerts,
theatres, or books. How did he spend his time? He was certainly chivalrous, and a trifle
simpleminded. She fancied (so much is there in a change of costume) that she had never met
with such a man before. What could he be?
“Mr. Benson,” she said, breaking a silence devoted to landscape.
He rolled over and regarded her, chin on knuckles.
“At your service.”
“Do you paint? Are you an artist?”
“Well.” Judicious pause. “I should hardly call myself a Nartist.” you know. I do paint a
little. And sketch, you know — skitty kind of things.”
He plucked and began to nibble a blade of grass. It was really not so much lying as his
quick imagination that prompted him to add, “In Papers, you know, and all that.”
“I see,” said Jessie, looking at him thoughtfully. Artists were a very heterogeneous class
certainly, and geniuses had a trick of being a little odd. He avoided her eye and bit his grass.
“I don’t do much, you know.”
“It’s not your profession?
“Oh, no,” said Hoopdriver, anxious now to hedge. “I don’t make a regular thing of it, you
know. jest now and then something comes into my head and down it goes. No — I’m not a
regular artist.”“Then you don’t practise any regular profession? Mr. Hoopdriver looked into her eyes
and saw their quiet unsuspicious regard. He had vague ideas of resuming the detective role.
“It’s like this,” he said, to gain time. “I have a sort of profession. Only there’s a kind of reason
— nothing much, you know —”
“I beg your pardon for cross-examining you.”
“No trouble,” said Mr. Hoopdriver. “Only I can’t very well — I leave it to you, you know. I
don’t want to make any mystery of it, so far as that goes.” Should he plunge boldly and be a
barrister? That anyhow was something pretty good. But she might know about barristry.
“I think I could guess what you are.”
“Well — guess,” said Mr. Hoopdriver.
“You come from one of the colonies?”
“Dear me!” said Mr. Hoopdriver, veering round to the new wind. “How did you find out
that?” (the man was born in a London suburb, dear Reader.)
“I guessed,” she said.
He lifted his eyebrows as one astonished, and clutched a new piece of grass.
“You were educated up country.”
“Good again,” said Hoopdriver, rolling over again into her elbow. “You’re a clairvoy ant.”
He bit at the grass, smiling. “Which colony was it?”
“That I don’t know.”
“You must guess,” said Hoopdriver.
“South Africa,” she said. “I strongly incline to South Africa.”
“South Africa’s quite a large place,” he said.
“But South Africa is right?”
“You’re warm,” said Hoopdriver, “anyhow,” and the while his imagination was eagerly
exploring this new province.
“South Africa is right?” she insisted.
He turned over again and nodded, smiling reassuringly into her eyes.
“What made me think of South Africa was that novel of Olive Schreiner’s, you know —
The Story of an African Farm.’ Gregory Rose is so like you.”
“I never read ‘The Story of an African Farm,’” said Hoopdriver. “I must. What’s he like?”
“You must read the book. But it’s a wonderful place, with its mixture of races, and its
brand-new civilisation jostling the old savagery. Were you near Khama?”
“He was a long way off from our place,” said Mr. Hoopdriver. “We had a little ostrich
farm, you know — Just a few hundred of ‘em, out Johannesburg way.”
“On the Karroo — was it called?”
“That’s the term. Some of it was freehold though. Luckily. We got along very well in the
old days. — But there’s no ostriches on that farm now.” He had a diamond mine in his head,
just at the moment, but he stopped and left a little to the girl’s imagination. Besides which it
had occurred to him with a kind of shock that he was lying.
“What became of the ostriches?”
“We sold ‘em off, when we parted with the farm. Do you mind if I have another cigarette?
That was when I was quite a little chap, you know, that we had this ostrich farm.”
“Did you have Blacks and Boers about you?”
“Lots,” said Mr. Hoopdriver, striking a match on his instep and beginning to feel hot at the
new responsibility he had brought upon himself.
“How interesting! Do you know, I’ve never been out of England except to Paris and
Mentone and Switzerland.”
“One gets tired of travelling (puff) after a bit, of course.”
“You must tell me about your farm in South Africa. It always stimulates my imagination to
think of these places. I can fancy all the tall ostriches being driven out by a black herd — to
graze, I suppose. How do ostriches feed?”“Well,” said Hoopdriver. “That’s rather various. They have their fancies, you know.
There’s fruit, of course, and that kind of thing. And chicken food, and so forth. You have to
use judgment.”
“Did you ever see a lion?”
“They weren’t very common in our district,” said Hoopdriver, quite modestly. “But I’ve
seen them, of course. Once or twice.”
“Fancy seeing a lion! Weren’t you frightened?”
Mr. Hoopdriver was now thoroughly sorry he had accepted that offer of South Africa. He
puffed his cigarette and regarded the Solent languidly as he settled the fate on that lion in his
mind. “I scarcely had time,” he said. “It all happened in a minute.”
“Go on,” she said.
“I was going across the inner paddock where the fatted ostriches were.”
“Did you eat ostriches, then? I did not know —”
“Eat them! — often. Very nice they are too, properly stuffed. Well, we — I, rather — was
going across this paddock, and I saw something standing up in the moonlight and looking at
me.” Mr. Hoopdriver was in a hot perspiration now. His invention seemed to have gone limp.
“Luckily I had my father’s gun with me. I was scared, though, I can tell you. (Puff.) I just aimed
at the end that I thought was the head. And let fly. (Puff.) And over it went, you know.”
“As dead. It was one of the luckiest shots I ever fired. And I wasn’t much over nine at the
time, neither.”
“I should have screamed and run away.”
“There’s some things you can’t run away from,” said Mr. Hoopdriver. “To run would have
been Death.”
“I don’t think I ever met a lion-killer before,” she remarked, evidently with a heightened
opinion of him.
There was a pause. She seemed meditating further questions. Mr. Hoopdriver drew his
watch hastily. “I say,” said Mr. Hoopdriver, showing it to her, “don’t you think we ought to be
getting on?”
His face was flushed, his ears bright red. She ascribed his confusion to modesty. He
rose with a lion added to the burthens of his conscience, and held out his hand to assist her.
They walked down into Cosham again, resumed their machines, and went on at a leisurely
pace along the northern shore of the big harbour. But Mr. Hoopdriver was no longer happy.
This horrible, this fulsome lie, stuck in his memory. Why had he done it? She did not ask for
any more South African stories, happily — at least until Porchester was reached — but talked
instead of Living One’s Own Life, and how custom hung on people like chains. She talked
wonderfully, and set Hoopdriver’s mind fermenting. By the Castle, Mr. Hoopdriver caught
several crabs in little shore pools. At Fareham they stopped for a second tea, and left the
place towards the hour of sunset, under such invigorating circumstances as you shall in due
course hear.
Chapter 21 — The Rescue Expedition

And now to tell of those energetic chevaliers, Widgery, Dangle, and Phipps, and of that
distressed beauty, ‘Thomas Plantagenet,’ well known in society, so the paragraphs said, as
Mrs. Milton. We left them at Midhurst station, if I remember rightly, waiting, in a state of fine
emotion, for the Chichester train. It was clearly understood by the entire Rescue Party that
Mrs. Milton was bearing up bravely against almost overwhelming grief. The three gentlemen
outdid one another in sympathetic expedients; they watched her gravely almost tenderly. The
substantial Widgery tugged at his moustache, and looked his unspeakable feelings at her with
those dog-like, brown eyes of his; the slender Dangle tugged at HIS moustache, and did what
he could with unsympathetic grey ones. Phipps, unhappily, had no moustache to run any risks
with, so he folded his arms and talked in a brave, indifferent, bearing-up tone about the
London, Brighton, and South Coast Railway, just to cheer the poor woman up a little. And
even Mrs. Milton really felt that exalted melancholy to the very bottom of her heart, and tried
to show it in a dozen little, delicate, feminine ways.
“There is nothing to do until we get to Chichester,” said Dangle. “Nothing.”
“Nothing,” said Widgery, and aside in her ear: “You really ate scarcely anything, you
“Their trains are always late,” said Phipps, with his fingers along the edge of his collar.
Dangle, you must understand, was a sub-editor and reviewer, and his pride was to be Thomas
Plantagenet’s intellectual companion. Widgery, the big man, was manager of a bank and a
mighty golfer, and his conception of his relations to her never came into his mind without
those charming oldlines, “Douglas, Douglas, tender and true,” falling hard upon its heels. His
name was Douglas-Douglas Widgery. And Phipps, Phipps was a medical student still, and he
felt that he laid his heart at her feet, the heart of a man of the world. She was kind to them all
in her way, and insisted on their being friends together, in spite of a disposition to reciprocal
criticism they displayed. Dangle thought Widgery a Philistine, appreciating but coarsely the
merits of “A Soul Untrammelled,” and Widgery thought Dangle lacked, humanity — would talk
insincerely to say a clever thing. Both Dangle and Widgery thought Phipps a bit of a cub, and
Phipps thought both Dangle and Widgery a couple of Thundering Bounders.
“They would have got to Chichester in time for lunch,” said Dangle, in the train. “After,
perhaps. And there’s no sufficient place in the road. So soon as we get there, Phipps must
inquire at the chief hotels to see if any one answering to her description has lunched there.”
“Oh, I’ll inquire,” said Phipps. “Willingly. I suppose you and Widgery will just hang about
He saw an expression of pain on Mrs. Milton’s gentle face, and stopped abruptly.
“No,” said Dangle, “we shan’t hang about, as you put it. There are two places in
Chichester where tourists might go — the cathedral and a remarkably fine museum. I shall go
to the cathedral and make an inquiry or so, while Widgery —”
“The museum. Very well. And after that there’s a little thing or two I’ve thought of
myself,” said Widgery.
To begin with they took Mrs. Milton in a kind of procession to the Red Hotel and
established her there with some tea. “You are so kind to me,” she said. “All of you.” They
signified that it was nothing, and dispersed to their inquiries. By six they returned, their zeal a
little damped, without news. Widgery came back with Dangle. Phipps was the last to return.
“You’re quite sure,” said Widgery, that there isn’t any flaw in that inference of yours?”
“Quite,” said Dangle, rather shortly.
“Of course,” said Widgery, “their starting from Midhurst on the Chichester road doesn’tabsolutely bind them not to change their minds.”
“My dear fellow! — It does. Really it does. You must allow me to have enough
intelligence to think of cross-roads. Really you must. There aren’t any cross-roads to tempt
them. Would they turn aside here? No. Would they turn there? Many more things are
inevitable than you fancy.”
“We shall see at once,” said Widgery, at the window. “Here comes Phipps. For my own
part —”
“Phipps!” said Mrs. Milton. “Is he hurrying? Does he look —” She rose in her eagerness,
biting her trembling lip, and went towards the window.
“No news,” said Phipps, entering.
“Ah!” said Widgery.
“None?” said Dangle.
“Well,” said Phipps. “One fellow had got hold of a queer story of a man in bicycling
clothes, who was asking the same question about this time yesterday.”
“What question?” said Mrs. Milton, in the shadow of the window. She spoke in a low
voice, almost a whisper.
“Why — Have you seen a young lady in a grey bicycling costume?”
Dangle caught at his lower lip. “What’s that?” he said. “Yesterday! A man asking after her
then! What can that mean?”
“Heaven knows,” said Phipps, sitting down wearily. “You’d better infer.”
“What kind of man?” said Dangle.
“How should I know? — in bicycling costume, the fellow said.”
“But what height? — What complexion?”
“Didn’t ask,” said Phipps.
“Didn’t ask! Nonsense,” said Dangle.
“Ask him yourself,” said Phipps. “He’s an ostler chap in the White Hart, — short, thick-set
fellow, with a red face and a crusty manner. Leaning up against the stable door. Smells of
whiskey. Go and ask him.”
“Of course,” said Dangle, taking his straw hat from the shade over the stuffed bird on the
chiffonier and turning towards the door. “I might have known.”
Phipps’ mouth opened and shut.
“You’re tired, I’m sure, Mr. Phipps,” said the lady, soothingly. “Let me ring for some tea
for you.” It suddenly occurred to Phipps that he had lapsed a little from his chivalry. “I was a
little annoyed at the way he rushed me to do all this business,” he said. “But I’d do a hundred
times as much if it would bring you any nearer to her.” Pause. “I would like a little tea.”
“I don’t want to raise any false hopes,” said Widgery. “But I do not believe they even
came to Chichester. Dangle’s a very clever fellow, of course, but sometimes these Inferences
of his —”
“Tchak!” said Phipps, suddenly.
“What is it?” said Mrs. Milton.
“Something I’ve forgotten. I went right out from here, went to every other hotel in the
place, and never thought — But never mind. I’ll ask when the waiter comes.”
“You don’t mean —” A tap, and the door opened. “Tea, m’m? yes, m’m,” said the waiter.
“One minute,” said Phipps. “Was a lady in grey, a cycling lady —”
“Stopped here yesterday? Yessir. Stopped the night. With her brother, sir — a young
“Brother!” said Mrs. Milton, in a low tone. “Thank God!”
The waiter glanced at her and understood everything. “A young gent, sir,” he said, “very
free with his money. Give the name of Beaumont.” He proceeded to some rambling
particulars, and was cross-examined by Widgery on the plans of the young couple.
“Havant! Where’s Havant?” said Phipps. “I seem to remember it somewhere.”“Was the man tall?” said Mrs. Milton, intently, “distinguished looking? with a long, flaxen
moustache? and spoke with a drawl?”
“Well,” said the waiter, and thought. “His moustache, m’m, was scarcely long — scrubby
more, and young looking.”
“About thirty-five, he was?”
“No, m’m. More like five and twenty. Not that.”
“Dear me!” said Mrs. Milton, speaking in a curious, hollow voice, fumbling for her salts,
and showing the finest self-control. “It must have been her younger brother — must have
“That will do, thank you,” said Widgery, officiously, feeling that she would be easier under
this new surprise if the man were dismissed. The waiter turned to go, and almost collided with
Dangle, who was entering the room, panting excitedly and with a pocket handkerchief held to
his right eye. “Hullo!” said dangle. “What’s up?”
“What’s up with you?” said Phipps.
“Nothing — an altercation merely with that drunken ostler of yours. He thought it was a
plot to annoy him — that the Young Lady in Grey was mythical. Judged from your manner.
I’ve got a piece of raw meat to keep over it. You have some news, I see?”
“Did the man hit you?” asked Widgery.
Mrs. Milton rose and approached Dangle. “Cannot I do anything?”
Dangle was heroic. “Only tell me your news,” he said, round the corner of the
“It was in this way,” said Phipps, and explained rather sheepishly. While he was doing so,
with a running fire of commentary from Widgery, the waiter brought in a tray of tea. “A time
table,” said Dangle, promptly, “for Havant.” Mrs. Milton poured two cups, and Phipps and
Dangle partook in passover form. They caught the train by a hair’s breadth. So to Havant and
Dangle was puffed up to find that his guess of Havant was right. In view of the fact that
beyond Havant the Southampton road has a steep hill continuously on the right-hand side,
and the sea on the left, he hit upon a magnificent scheme for heading the young folks off. He
and Mrs. Milton would go to Fareham, Widgery and Phipps should alight one each at the
intermediate stations of Cosham and Porchester, and come on by the next train if they had no
news. If they did not come on, a wire to the Fareham post office was to explain why. It was
Napoleonic, and more than consoled Dangle for the open derision of the Havant street boys at
the handkerchief which still protected his damaged eye.
Moreover, the scheme answered to perfection. The fugitives escaped by a hair’s
breadth. They were outside the Golden Anchor at Fareham, and preparing to mount, as Mrs.
Milton and Dangle came round the corner from the station. “It’s her!” said Mrs. Milton, and
would have screamed. “Hist!” said Dangle, gripping the lady’s arm, removing his handkerchief
in his excitement, and leaving the piece of meat over his eye, an extraordinary appearance
which seemed unexpectedly to calm her. “Be cool!” said Dangle, glaring under the meat.
“They must not see us. They will get away else. Were there flys at the station?” The young
couple mounted and vanished round the corner of the Winchester road. Had it not been for
the publicity of the business, Mrs. Milton would have fainted. “Save her!” she said.
“Ah! A conveyance,” said Dangle. “One minute.”
He left her in a most pathetic attitude, with her hand pressed to her heart, and rushed
into the Golden Anchor. Dog cart in ten minutes. Emerged. The meat had gone now, and one
saw the cooling puffiness over his eye. “I will conduct you back to the station,” said Dangle;
“hurry back here, and pursue them. You will meet Widgery and Phipps and tell them I am in
She was whirled back to the railway station and left there, on a hard, blistered, wooden
seat in the sun. She felt tired and dreadfully ruffled and agitated and dusty. Dangle was, nodoubt, most energetic and devoted; but for a kindly, helpful manner commend her to Douglas
Meanwhile Dangle, his face golden in the evening sun, was driving (as well as he could) a
large, black horse harnessed into a thing called a gig, northwestward towards Winchester.
Dangle, barring his swollen eye, was a refined-looking little man, and be wore a deerstalker
cap and was dressed in dark grey. His neck was long and slender. Perhaps you know what
gigs are, — huge, big, wooden things and very high and the horse, too, was huge and big and
high, with knobby legs, a long face, a hard mouth, and a whacking trick of pacing. Smack,
smack, smack, smack it went along the road, and hard by the church it shied vigorously at a
hooded perambulator.
The history of the Rescue Expedition now becomes confused. It appears that Widgery
was extremely indignant to find Mrs. Milton left about upon the Fareham platform. The day
had irritated him somehow, though he had started with the noblest intentions, and he seemed
glad to find an outlet for justifiable indignation. “He’s such a spasmodic creature,” said
Widgery. “Rushing off! And I suppose we’re to wait here until he comes back! It’s likely. He’s
so egotistical, is Dangle. Always wants to mismanage everything himself.”
“He means to help me,” said Mrs. Milton, a little reproachfully, touching his arm. Widgery
was hardly in the mood to be mollified all at once. “He need not prevent ME,” he said, and
stopped. “It’s no good talking, you know, and you are tired.”
“I can go on,” she said brightly, “if only we find her.”
“While I was cooling my heels in Cosham I bought a county map.” He produced and
opened it. “Here, you see, is the road out of Fareham.” He proceeded with the calm
deliberation of a business man to develop a proposal of taking train forthwith to Winchester.
“They MUST be going to Winchester,” he explained. It was inevitable. To-morrow Sunday,
Winchester a cathedral town, road going nowhere else of the slightest importance,
“But Mr. Dangle?”
“He will simply go on until he has to pass something, and then he will break his neck. I
have seen Dangle drive before. It’s scarcely likely a dog-cart, especially a hired dog-cart, will
overtake bicycles in the cool of the evening. Rely upon me, Mrs. Milton —”
“I am in your hands,” she said, with pathetic littleness, looking up at him, and for the
moment he forgot the exasperation of the day.
Phipps, during this conversation, had stood in a somewhat depressed attitude, leaning on
his stick, feeling his collar, and looking from one speaker to the other. The idea of leaving
Dangle behind seemed to him an excellent one. “We might leave a message at the place
where he got the dog-cart,” he suggested, when he saw their eyes meeting. There was a
cheerful alacrity about all three at the proposal.
But they never got beyond Botley. For even as their train ran into the station, a mighty
rumbling was heard, there was a shouting overhead, the guard stood astonished on the
platform, and Phipps, thrusting his head out of the window, cried, “There he goes!” and
sprang out of the carriage. Mrs. Milton, following in alarm, just saw it. From Widgery it was
hidden. Botley station lies in a cutting, overhead was the roadway, and across the lemon
yellows and flushed pinks of the sunset, there whirled a great black mass, a horse like a
longnosed chess knight, the upper works of a gig, and Dangle in transit from front to back. A
monstrous shadow aped him across the cutting. It was the event of a second. Dangle seemed
to jump, hang in the air momentarily, and vanish, and after a moment’s pause came a
heartrending smash. Then two black heads running swiftly.
“Better get out,” said Phipps to Mrs. Milton, who stood fascinated in the doorway.
In another moment all three were hurrying up the steps. They found Dangle, hatless,
standing up with cut hands extended, having his hands brushed by an officious small boy. A
broad, ugly road ran downhill in a long vista, and in the distance was a little group of Botley
inhabitants holding the big, black horse. Even at that distance they could see the expressionof conscious pride on the monster’s visage. It was as wooden-faced a horse as you can
imagine. The beasts in the Tower of London, on which the men in armour are perched, are
the only horses I have ever seen at all like it. However, we are not concerned now with the
horse, but with Dangle. “Hurt?” asked Phipps, eagerly, leading.
“Mr. Dangle!” cried Mrs. Milton, clasping her hands.
“Hullo!” said Dangle, not surprised in the slightest. “Glad you’ve come. I may want you.
Bit of a mess I’m in — eigh? But I’ve caught ‘em. At the very place I expected, too.”
“Caught them!” said Widgery. Where are they?”
“Up there,” he said, with a backward motion of his head. “About a mile up the hill. I left
‘em. I had to.”
“I don’t understand,” said Mrs. Milton, with that rapt, painful look again. “Have you found
“I have. I wish I could wash the gravel out of my hands somewhere. It was like this, you
know. Came on them suddenly round a corner. Horse shied at the bicycles. They were sitting
by the roadside botanising flowers. I just had time to shout, ‘Jessie Milton, we’ve been looking
for you,’ and then that confounded brute bolted. I didn’t dare turn round. I had all my work to
do to save myself being turned over, as it was — so long as I did, I mean. I just shouted,
‘Return to your friends. All will be forgiven.’ And off I came, clatter, clatter. Whether they
heard —”
“Take me to her,” said Mrs. Milton, with intensity, turning towards Widgery.
“Certainly,” said Widgery, suddenly becoming active. “How far is it, Dangle?”
“Mile and a half or two miles. I was determined to find them, you know. I say though —
Look at my hands! But I beg your pardon, Mrs. Milton.” He turned to Phipps. “Phipps, I say,
where shall I wash the gravel out? And have a look at my knee?”
“There’s the station,” said Phipps, becoming helpful. Dangle made a step, and a
damaged knee became evident. “Take my arm,” said Phipps.
“Where can we get a conveyance?” asked Widgery of two small boys.
The two small boys failed to understand. They looked at one another.
“There’s not a cab, not a go-cart, in sight,” said Widgery. “It’s a case of a horse, a horse,
my kingdom for a horse.”
“There’s a harse all right,” said one of the small boys with a movement of the head.
“Don’t you know where we can hire traps? asked Widgery. “Or a cart or — anything?”
asked Mrs. Milton.
“John Ooker’s gart a cart, but no one can’t ‘ire’n,” said the larger of the small boys,
partially averting his face and staring down the road and making a song of it. “And so’s my
feyther, for’s leg us broke.”
“Not a cart even! Evidently. What shall we do?”
It occurred to Mrs. Milton that if Widgery was the man for courtly devotion, Dangle was
infinitely readier of resource. “I suppose —” she said, timidly. “Perhaps if you were to ask Mr.
Dangle —”
And then all the gilt came off Widgery. He answered quite rudely. “Confound Dangle!
Hasn’t he messed us up enough? He must needs drive after them in a trap to tell them we’re
coming, and now you want me to ask him —”
Her beautiful blue eyes were filled with tears. He stopped abruptly. “I’ll go and ask
Dangle,” he said, shortly. “If you wish it.” And went striding into the station and down the
steps, leaving her in the road under the quiet inspection of the two little boys, and with a kind
of ballad refrain running through her head, “Where are the Knights of the Olden Time?” and
feeling tired to death and hungry and dusty and out of curl, and, in short, a martyr woman.

It goes to my heart to tell of the end of that day, how the fugitives vanished into
Immensity; how there were no more trains how Botley stared unsympathetically with a
palpable disposition to derision, denying conveyances how the landlord of the Heron was
suspicious, how the next day was Sunday, and the hot summer’s day had crumpled the collar
of Phipps and stained the skirts of Mrs. Milton, and dimmed the radiant emotions of the whole
party. Dangle, with sticking-plaster and a black eye, felt the absurdity of the pose of the
Wounded Knight, and abandoned it after the faintest efforts. Recriminations never, perhaps,
held the foreground of the talk, but they played like summer lightning on the edge of the
conversation. And deep in the hearts of all was a galling sense of the ridiculous. Jessie, they
thought, was most to blame. Apparently, too, the worst, which would have made the whole
business tragic, was not happening. Here was a young woman — young woman do I say? a
mere girl! — had chosen to leave a comfortable home in Surbiton, and all the delights of a
refined and intellectual circle, and had rushed off, trailing us after her, posing hard, mutually
jealous, and now tired and weather-worn, to flick us off at last, mere mud from her wheel, into
this detestable village beer-house on a Saturday night! And she had done it, not for Love and
Passion, which are serious excuses one may recognise even if one must reprobate, but just
for a Freak, just for a fantastic Idea; for nothing, in fact, but the outraging of Common Sense.
Yet withal, such was our restraint, that we talked of her still as one much misguided, as one
who burthened us with anxiety, as a lamb astray, and Mrs. Milton having eaten, continued to
show the finest feelings on the matter.
She sat, I may mention, in the cushioned basket-chair, the only comfortable chair in the
room, and we sat on incredibly hard, horsehair things having antimacassars tied to their backs
by means of lemon-coloured bows. It was different from those dear old talks at Surbiton,
somehow. She sat facing the window, which was open (the night was so tranquil and warm),
and the dim light — for we did not use the lamp — suited her admirably. She talked in a voice
that told you she was tired, and she seemed inclined to state a case against herself in the
matter of “A Soul Untrammelled.” It was such an evening as might live in a sympathetic
memoir, but it was a little dull while it lasted.
“I feel,” she said, “that I am to blame. I have Developed. That first book of mine — I do
not go back upon a word of it, mind, but it has been misunderstood, misapplied.”
“It has,” said Widgery, trying to look so deeply sympathetic as to be visible in the dark.
“Deliberately misunderstood.”
“Don’t say that,” said the lady. “Not deliberately. I try and think that critics are honest.
After their lights. I was not thinking of critics. But she — I mean —” She paused, an
“It is possible,” said Dangle, scrutinising his sticking-plaster.
“I write a book and state a case. I want people to think as I recommend, not to do as I
recommend. It is just Teaching. Only I make it into a story. I want to Teach new Ideas, new
Lessons, to promulgate Ideas. Then when the Ideas have been spread abroad — Things will
come about. Only now it is madness to fly in the face of the established order. Bernard Shaw,
you know, has explained that with regard to Socialism. We all know that to earn all you
consume is right, and that living on invested capital is wrong. Only we cannot begin while we
are so few. It is Those Others.”
“Precisely,” said Widgery. “It is Those Others. They must begin first.”
“And meanwhile you go on banking —”
“If I didn’t, some one else would.”
“And I live on Mr. Milton’s Lotion while I try to gain a footing in Literature.”
“Try!” said Phipps. “You have done so.” And, “That’s different,” said Dangle, at the same
“You are so kind to me. But in this matter. Of course Georgina Griffiths in my book lived
alone in a flat in Paris and went to life classes and had men visitors, but then she was overtwenty-one.”
“Jessica is only seventeen, and girlish for that,” said Dangle.
“It alters everything. That child! It is different with a woman. And Georgina Griffiths never
flaunted her freedom — on a bicycle, in country places. In this country. Where every one is so
particular. Fancy, sleeping away from home. It’s dreadful — If it gets about it spells ruin for
“Ruin,” said Widgery.
“No man would marry a girl like that,” said Phipps.
“It must be hushed up,” said Dangle.
“It always seems to me that life is made up of individuals, of individual cases. We must
weigh each person against his or her circumstances. General rules don’t apply —”
“I often feel the force of that,” said Widgery. “Those are my rules. Of course my books
“It’s different, altogether different,” said Dangle. “A novel deals with typical cases.”
“And life is not typical,” said Widgery, with immense profundity.
Then suddenly, unintentionally, being himself most surprised and shocked of any in the
room, Phipps yawned. The failing was infectious, and the gathering having, as you can easily
understand, talked itself weary, dispersed on trivial pretences. But not to sleep immediately.
Directly Dangle was alone he began, with infinite disgust, to scrutinise his darkling eye, for he
was a neat-minded little man in spite of his energy. The whole business — so near a capture
— was horribly vexatious. Phipps sat on his bed for some time examining, with equal disgust,
a collar he would have thought incredible for Sunday twenty-four hours before. Mrs. Milton fell
a-musing on the mortality of even big, fat men with dog-like eyes, and Widgery was unhappy
because he had been so cross to her at the station, and because so far he did not feel that he
had scored over Dangle. Also he was angry with Dangle. And all four of them, being souls
living very much upon the appearances of things, had a painful, mental middle distance of
Botley derisive and suspicious, and a remoter background of London humorous, and Surbiton
speculative. Were they really, after all, behaving absurdly?
Chapter 22 — Mr. Hoopdriver, Knight Errant

As Mr. Dangle bad witnessed, the fugitives had been left by him by the side of the road
about two miles from Botley. Before Mr. Dangle’s appearance, Mr. Hoopdriver had been
learning with great interest that mere roadside flowers had names, — star-flowers, wind-stars,
St. John’s wort, willow herb, lords and ladies, bachelor’s buttons, — most curious names,
some of them. “The flowers are all different in South Africa, y’know,” he was explaining with a
happy fluke of his imagination to account for his ignorance. Then suddenly, heralded by
clattering sounds and a gride of wheels, Dangle had flared and thundered across the
tranquillity of the summer evening; Dangle, swaying and gesticulating behind a corybantic
black horse, had hailed Jessie by her name, had backed towards the hedge for no ostensible
reason, and vanished to the accomplishment of the Fate that had been written down for him
from the very beginning of things. Jessie and Hoopdriver had scarcely time to stand up and
seize their machines, before this tumultuous, this swift and wonderful passing of Dangle was
achieved. He went from side to side of the road, — worse even than the riding forth of Mr.
Hoopdriver it was, — and vanished round the corner.
“He knew my name,” said Jessie. “Yes — it was Mr. Dangle.”
“That was our bicycles did that,” said Mr. Hoopdriver simultaneously, and speaking with a
certain complacent concern. “I hope he won’t get hurt.”
“That was Mr. Dangle,” repeated Jessie, and Mr. Hoopdriver heard this time, with a
violent start. His eyebrows went up spasmodically.
“What! someone you know?”
“He was looking for me,” said Jessie. “I could see. He began to call to me before the
horse shied. My stepmother has sent him.”
Mr. Hoopdriver wished he had returned the bicycle after all, for his ideas were still a little
hazy about Bechamel and Mrs. Milton. Honesty IS the best policy — often, he thought. He
turned his head this way and that. He became active. “After us, eigh? Then he’ll come back.
He’s gone down that hill, and he won’t be able to pull up for a bit, I’m certain.”
Jessie, he saw, had wheeled her machine into the road and was mounting. Still staring at
the corner that had swallowed up Dangle, Hoopdriver followed suit. And so, just as the sun
was setting, they began another flight together, — riding now towards Bishops Waltham, with
Mr. Hoopdriver in the post of danger — the rear — ever and again looking over his shoulder
and swerving dangerously as he did so. Occasionally Jessie had to slacken her pace. He
breathed heavily, and hated himself because his mouth fell open. After nearly an hour’s hard
riding, they found themselves uncaught at Winchester. Not a trace of Dangle nor any other
danger was visible as they rode into the dusky, yellow-lit street. Though the bats had been
fluttering behind the hedges and the evening star was bright while they were still two miles
from Winchester, Mr. Hoopdriver pointed out the dangers of stopping in such an obvious
abiding-place, and gently but firmly insisted upon replenishing the lamps and riding on towards
Salisbury. From Winchester, roads branch in every direction, and to turn abruptly westward
was clearly the way to throw off the chase. As Hoopdriver saw the moon rising broad and
yellow through the twilight, he thought he should revive the effect of that ride out of Bognor;
but somehow, albeit the moon and all the atmospheric effects were the same, the emotions
were different. They rode in absolute silence, and slowly after they had cleared the outskirts of
Winchester. Both of them were now nearly tired out, — the level was tedious, and even a little
hill a burden; and so it came about that in the hamlet of Wallenstock they were beguiled tostop and ask for accommodation in an exceptionally prosperous looking village inn. A plausible
landlady rose to the occasion.
Now, as they passed into the room where their suppers were prepared, Mr. Hoopdriver
caught a glimpse through a door ajar and floating in a reek of smoke, of three and a half faces
— for the edge of the door cut one down — and an American cloth-covered table with several
glasses and a tankard. And he also heard a remark. In the second before he heard that
remark, Mr. Hoopdriver had been a proud and happy man, to particularize, a baronet’s heir
incognito. He had surrendered their bicycles to the odd man of the place with infinite easy
dignity, and had bowingly opened the door for Jessie. “Who’s that, then?” he imagined people
saying; and then, “Some’n pretty well orf — judge by the bicycles.” Then the imaginary
spectators would fall a-talking of the fashionableness of bicycling, — how judges. And
stockbrokers and actresses and, in fact, all the best people rode, and how that it was often
the fancy of such great folk to shun the big hotels, the adulation of urban crowds, and seek,
incognito, the cosy quaintnesses of village life. Then, maybe, they would think of a certain
nameless air of distinction about the lady who had stepped across the doorway, and about the
handsome, flaxen-moustached, blue-eyed Cavalier who had followed her in, and they would
look one to another. “Tell you what it is,” one of the village elders would say — just as they do
in novels — voicing the thought of all, in a low, impressive tone: “There’s such a thinas
entertaining barranets unawares-not to mention no higher things —”
Such, I say, had been the filmy, delightful stuff in Mr. Hoopdriver’s head the moment
before he heard that remark. But the remark toppled him headlong. What the precise remark
was need not concern us. It was a casual piece of such satire as Strephon delights in. Should
you be curious, dear lady, as to its nature, you have merely to dress yourself in a really
modern cycling costume, get one of the feeblest-looking of your men to escort you, and ride
out, next Saturday evening, to any public house where healthy, homely people gather
together. Then you will hear quite a lot of the kind of thing Mr. Hoopdriver heard. More,
possibly, than you will desire.
The remark, I must add, implicated Mr. Hoopdriver. It indicated an entire disbelief in his
social standing. At a blow, it shattered all the gorgeous imaginative fabric his mind had been
rejoicing in. All that foolish happiness vanished like a dream. And there was nothing to show
for it, as there is nothing to show for any spiteful remark that has ever been made. Perhaps
the man who said the thing had a gleam of satisfaction at the idea of taking a
complacentlooking fool down a peg, but it is just as possible he did not know at the time that his stray
shot had hit. He had thrown it as a boy throws a stone at a bird. And it not only demolished a
foolish, happy conceit, but it wounded. It touched Jessie grossly.
She did not hear it, he concluded from her subsequent bearing; but during the supper
they had in the little private dining-room, though she talked cheerfully, he was preoccupied.
Whiffs of indistinct conversation, and now and then laughter, came in from the inn parlor
through the pelargoniums in the open window. Hoopdriver felt it must all be in the same strain,
— at her expense and his. He answered her abstractedly. She was tired, she said, and
presently went to her room. Mr. Hoopdriver, in his courtly way, opened the door for her and
bowed her out. He stood listening and fearing some new offence as she went upstairs, and
round the bend where the barometer hung beneath the stuffed birds. Then he went back to
the room, and stood on the hearthrug before the. paper fireplace ornament. “Cads!” he said in
a scathing undertone, as a fresh burst of laughter came floating in. All through supper he had
been composing stinging repartee, a blistering speech of denunciation to be presently
delivered. He would rate them as a nobleman should: “Call themselves Englishmen, indeed,
and insult a woman!” he would say; take the names and addresses perhaps, threaten to
speak to the Lord of the Manor, promise to let them hear from him again, and so out with
consternation in his wake. It really ought to be done.
“Teach ‘em better,” he said fiercely, and tweaked his moustache painfully. What was it?He revived the objectionable remark for his own exasperation, and then went over the heads
of his speech again.
He coughed, made three steps towards the door, then stopped and went back to the
hearthrug. He wouldn’t — after all. Yet was he not a Knight Errant? Should such men go
unreproved, unchecked, by wandering baronets incognito? Magnanimity? Look at it in that
way? Churls beneath one’s notice? No; merely a cowardly subterfuge. He would after all.
Something within him protested that he was a hot-headed ass even as he went towards
the door again. But he only went on the more resolutely. He crossed the hall, by the bar, and
entered the room from which the remark had proceeded. He opened the door abruptly and
stood scowling on them in the doorway. “You’ll only make a mess of it,” remarked the internal
sceptic. There were five men in the room altogether: a fat person, with a long pipe and a great
number of chins, in an armchair by the fireplace, who wished Mr. Hoopdriver a good evening
very affably; a young fellow smoking a cutty and displaying crossed legs with gaiters; a little,
bearded man with a toothless laugh; a middle-aged, comfortable man with bright eyes, who
wore a velveteen jacket; and a fair young man, very genteel in a yellowish-brown ready-made
suit and a white tie.
“H’m,” said Mr. Hoopdriver, looking very stern and harsh. And then in a forbidding tone,
as one who consented to no liberties, “Good evening.”
“Very pleasant day we’ve been ‘aving,” said the fair young man with the white tie.
“Very,” said Mr. Hoopdriver, slowly; and taking a brown armchair, he planted it with great
deliberation where he faced the fireplace, and sat down. Let’s see — how did that speech
“Very pleasant roads about here,” said the fair young man with the white tie.
“Very,” said Mr. Hoopdriver, eyeing him darkly. Have to begin somehow. “The roads
about here are all right, and the weather about here is all right, but what I’ve come in here to
say is — there’s some damned unpleasant people — damned unpleasant people!”
“Oh!” said the young man with the gaiters, apparently making a mental inventory of his
pearl buttons as he spoke. “How’s that?”
Mr. Hoopdriver put his hands on his knees and stuck out his elbows with extreme
angularity. In his heart he was raving at his idiotic folly at thus bearding these lions, —
indisputably they were lions, — but he had to go through with it now. Heaven send, his breath,
which was already getting a trifle spasmodic, did not suddenly give out. He fixed his eye on
the face of the fat man with the chins, and spoke in a low, impressive voice. “I came here,
sir,” said Mr. Hoopdriver, and paused to inflate his cheeks, “with a lady.”
“Very nice lady,” said the man with the gaiters, putting his head on one side to admire a
pearl button that had been hiding behind the curvature of his calf. “Very nice lady indeed.”
“I came here,” said Mr. Hoopdriver, “with a lady.”
“We saw you did, bless you,” said the fat man with the chins, in a curious wheezy voice.
“I don’t see there’s anything so very extraordinary in that. One ‘ud think we hadn’t eyes.”
Mr. Hoopdriver coughed. “I came, here, sir —”
“We’ve ‘eard that,” said the little man with the beard, sharply and went off into an amiable
chuckle. “We know it by ‘art,” said the little man, elaborating the point.
Mr. Hoopdriver temporarily lost his thread. He glared malignantly at the little man with the
beard, and tried to recover his discourse. A pause.
“You were saying,” said the fair young man with the white tie, speaking very politely, “that
you came here with a lady.”
“A lady,” meditated the gaiter gazer.
The man in velveteen, who was looking from one speaker to another with keen, bright
eyes, now laughed as though a point had been scored, and stimulated Mr. Hoopdriver to
speak, by fixing him with an expectant regard.
“Some dirty cad,” said Mr. Hoopdriver, proceeding with his discourse, and suddenlygrowing extremely fierce, “made a remark as we went by this door.”
“Steady on!” said the old gentleman with many chins. “Steady on! Don’t you go a-calling
us names, please.”
“One minute!” said Mr. Hoopdriver. “It wasn’t I began calling names.” (“Who did? said the
man with the chins.) “I’m not calling any of you dirty cads. Don’t run away with that
impression. Only some person in this room made a remark that showed he wasn’t fit to wipe
boots on, and, with all due deference to such gentlemen as are gentlemen” (Mr. Hoopdriver
looked round for moral support), “I want to know which it was.”
“Meanin’?” said the fair young man in the white tie.
“That I’m going to wipe my boots on ‘im straight away,” said Mr. Hoopdriver, reverting to
anger, if with a slight catch in his throat — than which threat of personal violence nothing had
been further from his thoughts on entering the room. He said this because he could think of
nothing else to say, and stuck out his elbows truculently to hide the sinking of his heart. It is
curious how situations run away with us.
“‘Ullo, Charlie!” said the little man, and “My eye!” said the owner of the chins. ‘You’re
going to wipe your boots on ‘im?” said the fair young man, in a tone of mild surprise.
“I am,” said Mr. Hoopdriver, with emphatic resolution, and glared in the young man’s
“That’s fair and reasonable,” said the man in the velveteen jacket; “if you can.”
The interest of the meeting seemed transferred to the young man in the white tic. “Of
course, if you can’t find out which it is, I suppose you’re prepared to wipe your boots in a
liberal way on everybody in the room,” said this young man, in the same tone of impersonal
question. “This gentleman, the champion lightweight —”
“Own up, Charlie,” said the young man with the gaiters, looking up for a moment. “And
don’t go a-dragging in your betters. It’s fair and square. You can’t get out of it.”
“Was it this — gent?” began Mr. Hoopdriver.
“Of course,” said the young man in the white tie, “when it comes to talking of wiping
boots —”
“I’m not talking; I’m going to do it,” said Mr. Hoopdriver.
He looked round at the meeting. They were no longer antagonists; they were spectators.
He would have to go through with it now. But this tone of personal aggression on the maker of
the remark had somehow got rid of the oppressive feeling of Hoopdriver contra mundum.
Apparently, he would have to fight someone. Would he get a black eye? Would he get very
much hurt? Pray goodness it wasn’t that sturdy chap in the gaiters! Should he rise and begin?
What would she think if he brought a black eye to breakfast to-morrow? “Is this the man?”
said Mr. Hoopdriver, with a business-like calm, and arms more angular than ever.
“Eat ‘im!” said the little man with the beard; “eat ‘im straight orf.”
“Steady on!” said the young man in the white tie. “Steady on a minute. If I did happen to
say —”
“You did, did you?” said Mr. Hoopdriver.
Backing out of it, Charlie?” said the young man with the gaiters.
“Not a bit,” said Charlie. “Surely we can pass a bit of a joke —”
“I’m going to teach you to keep your jokes to yourself,” said Mr. Hoopdriver.
“Bray-vo!” said the shepherd of the flock of chins.
“Charlie IS a bit too free with his jokes,” said the little man with the beard.
“It’s downright disgusting,” said Hoopdriver, falling back upon his speech. “A lady can’t
ride a bicycle in a country road, or wear a dress a little out of the ordinary, but every dirty little
greaser must needs go shouting insults —”
“I didn’t know the young lady would hear what I said,” said Charlie. “Surely one can
speak friendly to one’s friends. How was I to know the door was open —”
Hoopdriver began to s