"Can You Run Away from Sorrow?"

Ivana Bajic-Hajdukovic

Description

How does emigration affect those left behind? The fall of Yugoslavia in the 1990s led citizens to look for a better, more stable life elsewhere. For the older generations, however, this wasn't an option. In this powerful and moving work, Ivana Bajic-Hajdukovic reveals the impact that waves of emigration from Serbia had on family relationships and, in particular, on elderly mothers who stayed.

With nowhere to go, and any savings given to their children to help establish new lives, these seniors faced the crumbling country, waves of refugees from Croatia and Bosnia-Herzegovina, NATO bombing, the failing economy, and the trial and ouster of Slobodan Milosevic. "Can You Run Away from Sorrow?" poignantly depicts the intimacy of family relationships sustained through these turbulent times in Serbia and through the next generation's search for a new life. Bajic-Hajdukovic explores transformations in family intimacy during everyday life practices—in people's homes, in their food and cooking practices, in their childcare, and even in remittances and the exchange of gifts.

"Can You Run Away from Sorrow?" illustrates not only the tremendous sacrifice of parents, but also their profound sense of loss—of their families, their country, their stability and dignity, and most importantly, of their own identity and hope for what they thought their future would be.

Introduction
1. The Locust Years
2. A Bite of Yugoslavia: Food, Memory, and Migration
3. Weaving the Order: Homes and Everyday Practices of Belgrade Mothers
4. Inalienable Possessions: Serbian Remittances
5. Keeping in Touch: "Can you run away from sorrow?"
6. Family Revisited: The Consequences of Migration
Conclusion
Bibliography
Index

Sujets

• HISTORY
• Women
• Bosnia y Herzegovina
• Mothers
• Ethnography
• Gender
• Eastern Europe
• Yugoslavia
• Woman
• Serbia
• Social sciences
• History of Europe
• Croatia
• Bosnia and Herzegovina
• Anthropology
• Serbie
• The Women
• Eastern
• Yougoslavie
• Migration
• Europe
• Bosnie-Herzégovine

Informations

• Publié par: Indiana University Press
• Date de parution: 06 octobre 2020
• Nombre de lectures: 2
• EAN13: 9780253051356
• Langue: English

Extrait

NEW ANTHROPOLOGIES OF EUROPE
Michael Herzfeld, Melissa L. Caldwell, and Deborah Reed-Danahay, editors

This book is a publication of
Indiana University Press
Office of Scholarly Publishing
Herman B Wells Library 350
1320 East 10th Street
Bloomington, Indiana 47405 USA
iupress.indiana.edu
2020 by Ivana Baji -Hajdukovi
All rights reserved
No part of this book may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying and recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the publisher. The paper used in this publication meets the minimum requirements of the American National Standard for Information Sciences-Permanence of Paper for Printed Library Materials, ANSI Z39.48-1992.
Manufactured in the United States of America
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Names: Baji -Hajdukovi , Ivana, author.
Title: Can you run away from sorrow? : mothers left behind in 1990s Belgrade / Ivana Baji -Hajdukovi .
Description: Bloomington, Indiana : Indiana University Press, [2020] | Series: New anthropologies of Europe | Includes bibliographical references and index.
Identifiers: LCCN 2020000308 (print) | LCCN 2020000309 (ebook) | ISBN 9780253050069 (paperback) | ISBN 9780253050045 (hardback) | ISBN 9780253050052 (ebook)
Subjects: LCSH: Families-Serbia-Belgrade-History. | Mothers-Serbia-Belgrade-History. | Emigration and immigration-Serbia-History. | Serbia-History-1992-
Classification: LCC HQ658.6.Z9 B4533 2020 (print) | LCC HQ658.6.Z9 (ebook) | DDC 306.85094971-dc23
LC record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2020000308
LC ebook record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2020000309
1 2 3 4 5 25 24 23 22 21 20
To my mother and father
CONTENTS
Acknowledgments
Introduction
1 The Locust Years
2 A Bite of Yugoslavia: Food, Memory, and Migration
3 Weaving the Order: Homes and Everyday Practices of Belgrade Mothers
4 Inalienable Possessions: Serbian Remittances
5 Keeping in Touch: Can You Really Run Away from Sorrow?
6 Family Revisited: The Consequences of Migration
Conclusion
Bibliography
Index
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
T HIS BOOK HAS BEEN IN THE MAKING FOR a very long time. It could not have been realized without unwavering trust and support from the editorial team at Indiana University Press and many colleagues, friends, and family. Above all, the mothers who shared their lives and experiences have made this book possible. Most of them are no longer living, but their voices need to be heard. This book is a tribute to these extraordinary ordinary women.
I am forever indebted to Michael Herzfeld for opening the door to the world of anthropology. A chance encounter with Herzfeld s ethnographies about Greece as a postgraduate in Modern Greek Studies inspired me to embark on this new academic journey. I was doing research in Athens in spring 2003 for an MPhil thesis in Greek literature when a colleague gave me several books about Greece, all by Herzfeld. Once I read those books, there was no going back to Greek literature. Ethnography was the only way ahead for me.
As a latecomer to anthropology, I faced a steep learning curve. Daniel Miller provided unwavering support and guidance during my transition to anthropology and material culture studies at University College London (UCL). I owe special thanks to my fellow students at UCL and Danny s Dinner Group for their peer support and stimulating discussions: Anna Pertierra, Dimitris Dalakoglou, Magda Craciun, Wallis Motta, Panarai Ostapirat, Miran Shin, Marjorie Murray, and Zuzana Burikova. A special thanks goes to Julie Botticello, a colleague and friend from UCL who read many versions of the manuscript over the years and selflessly helped with the shaping of this book. Words cannot express thanks enough to Lucia Neva, who encouraged me to keep writing and believed in this book even when I felt discouraged.
David R. Prince from Prince Research Consultants (PRC) was a most understanding employer who generously allowed me to take months off to conduct my fieldwork in Belgrade. Sarah McCarthy was instrumental in helping me find my way at UCL and at PRC. Darya Feuerstein-Posner, a colleague from PRC and a wonderful friend, has been a source of encouragement, inspiration, and laughter for the past fifteen years.
Martin Kohli from the European University Institute in Florence, Italy, and the 2009-10 Max Weber postdoctoral fellows helped tremendously with their comments about the project on remittances that features in this book.
Over the past five years, I have enjoyed continuous support in my academic work from Troy Gordon, director at Syracuse University in London, and Meghan Callahan, assistant director for teaching and learning. I am grateful to my students at Syracuse University in London who have inspired the writing of this book with their questions, comments, and optimism.
I thank Melissa Caldwell for encouraging me to revisit the manuscript after a long break while I looked after a young family. Jennika Baines has provided excellent advice, in particular with curating a personal voice in the manuscript. I am deeply grateful to the anonymous reviewers who have improved this book with their comments and constructive criticism.
During the making of this book, I have lost both parents and welcomed twins to this world. These life-changing events have greatly influenced the writing, not only by making this process significantly longer but by giving it more depth and a vantage point for understanding the phenomenon of mothers left behind. My dear mother, Ljiljana, was with me every step of the way, in life and spirit, teaching me the meaning of mothers sacrifice and love. My father, Ranko, never missed a chance to inquire about the progress of the book or to impart unsolicited advice, which, along with his inimitable sense of humor, I have sorely missed. Throughout all this time, my husband, Darko, has been my anchor and, together with our children, an endless source of happiness and laughter.
Finally, this book would not have materialized without the people who shared their stories, their time, and their friendship in London and Belgrade. I cannot name these special people to protect their privacy. This book is dedicated to the memory of the mothers who sacrificed all they had during the crumbling of Yugoslavia so that their children could have a better future.
Sections of this book were previously published in Daniel Miller, ed., Anthropology and the Individual: A Material Culture Perspective (Oxford, UK: Berg, 2009), 115-30; Genero- asopis za feministi ku teoriju i studije kulture 14 (2010): 25-48; Food and Foodways: Explorations in the History and Culture of Human Nourishment 21, no. 1 (2013): 46-65; and Contemporary Southeastern Europe 1, no. 2 (2014): 61-79. I thank the editors of these publications for their permission to publish revised sections in this book.

INTRODUCTION
I N M AY 1991, MY FAMILY AND I WENT on a short May Day holiday to Istria, Croatia. There we met our friends Muharem and Marija, university professors from Sarajevo in their early sixties at the time. 1 A few days later, when it was time to say goodbye, a shadow of worry fell over us. Fighting had already started in Croatia, and no one knew how it would end. To ease the tension and reassure everyone, Muharem jovially yet sincerely exclaimed that if worse came to worst, everyone was welcome in Sarajevo, as nothing could ever happen there. Sarajevo, in Muharem s words, was the safest and most tolerant city in Yugoslavia. 2 The chasm between personal experience and public discourse continued to widen in the following months and years. Marija and her daughter fled to Belgrade when the war in Bosnia-Herzegovina started, while Muharem stayed in Sarajevo to face the horror of the Sarajevo siege. The war tore their family apart, just as it did thousands of other families throughout Yugoslavia.
In late June 1991, Slovenia and Croatia declared independence, followed by a ten-day war between the Yugoslav People s Army ( Jugoslovenska Narodna Armija ) and the Slovenian Territorial Defense ( Teritorialna obramba Republike Slovenije ). 3 While the unraveling of Yugoslavia was well underway, September 1991 marked the start of another school year for my generation. Our teachers carried on with their work as if nothing had changed. Despite any worries they might have had, the teachers marched on with their lessons, trying to keep us eighth graders from noticing the conflict. The fighting continued while we memorized every detail about the Julian Alps and the Dinaric mountains: this was still our homeland, as our Dalmatian geography teacher working in a suburban New Belgrade primary school taught us in the fall of 1991.
The brutal reality, however, found a way of seeping into everyone s lives, including us children. Our teachers determination failed to hide the almost palpable fear surrounding the horrific events as they unfolded. Children talked at school about conversations overheard at home. The most popular girl in our class told us about a presumed imminent bombing of Belgrade. Even without such politically savvy friends, we had seen a fair amount of uncensored footage of dead bodies on television, courtesy of Radio Television Belgrade broadcasting news from the war front all day long. 4 The world as we had known it and learned about at school was falling apart in front of us, without anyone explaining what was going on or why.
Our generation started high school the following September, in 1992. While our classrooms were exploding with newly arrived refugee children, our older siblings, relatives, and friends were l