In Sickness and in Health

David Hawkins

Description

Are you sick and tired of being sick and tired?When you first met your spouse you probably had a physical response to the emotions you felt. You'd get butterflies in your stomach, your heart would race, and your palms would sweat. So why is it that after you're married, it's so hard to make the connection between your physical health and your emotional well-being when you're facing relational stress?If your emotional pain feels physical and your physical pain feels emotional, your marriage may be making you sickliterally. Join Dr. David Hawkins and his sons, an internist and a surgeon, as they explore the effects relational stress and trauma can have on our bodies. You will learn to . . .recognize the link between emotional and physical painembrace the power of choice to become empowered by hopefind a path forward to ultimate restoration and regain your lifeNo matter what kind of pain you're experiencing, or how long your health has been in decline, you don't have to stay stuck. Discover hope and healing when you take control of your life.

Informations

• Publié par: Harvest House Publishers
• Date de parution: 19 février 2019
• Nombre de lectures: 0
• EAN13: 9780736974219
• Langue: English

Extrait

HARVEST HOUSE PUBLISHERS
EUGENE, OREGON
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Cover by John Hamilton Design
David Hawkins is represented by MacGregor Literary, Inc.
The material contained in this book is for informational purposes only and does not constitute medical advice. The content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of a physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical or psychological condition.
In Sickness and in Health
Copyright 2019 David Hawkins
Published by Harvest House Publishers
Eugene, Oregon 97408
www.harvesthousepublishers.com
ISBN 978-0-7369-7420-2 (pbk.)
ISBN 978-0-7369-7421-9 (eBook)
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Names: Hawkins, David, 1951- author. | Hawkins, Tyson, author. | Hawkins, Joshua, author.
Title: Is your marriage making you sick? / Dr. David Hawkins with Tyson Hawkins, MD, Joshua Hawkins, MD.
Description: Eugene: Harvest House Publishers, [2018]
Identifiers: LCCN 2018017296 (print) | LCCN 2018018869 (ebook) | ISBN 9780736974219 (ebook) | ISBN 9780736974202 (pbk.)
Subjects: LCSH: Marriage-Psychological aspects. | Stress management. | Emotions. | Mind and body.
Classification: LCC HQ734 (ebook) | LCC HQ734 .H39195 2018 (print) | DDC 306.8101/9-dc23
LC record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2018017296
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C ONTENTS
Dedication
Introduction
1. The Mind-Body Connection
2. Unhealthy Marriage, Unhealthy Body
3. My Lonely, Disappearing Life
4. The Struggle for a Self
5. What You ve Never Been Told About Stress
6. Exhaustion and the Emotional Hangover
7. The Anger That Fuels Everything
8. Lost, Alone, and Searching for Community
9. Healing Relationships, Mind, and Body
10. Disappointment with God
11. Taking Responsibility for Your Health
12. Ultimate Healing
Notes
About the Authors
Other Books by David Hawkins
About the Publisher
D EDICATION
To Christie, Jacqueline, and Jordana,
our wonderful wives,
who support and encourage us every day
to do the work we do!
I NTRODUCTION
C onnie is a busy 37-year-old mother of three. Her husband is a corporate executive with a large global company, which affords her the opportunity to stay home and homeschool the children. She has been active in her local homeschool organization until recently, when constant fatigue began to take a toll on her emotions. She began questioning her ability to provide what the children needed from her as their teacher.
They are bright and active, she said. I ve loved being able to homeschool them. But they tire me out, more than they should. I feel guilty that I m not doing more for them. I did a great job when they were younger, but it has become increasingly difficult to keep up with the curriculum and the kids since my health began going downhill.
Connie hasn t felt well for more than three years, but she has plowed forward. She came to me seeking counsel after seeing professionals in many areas of medicine.
I ve been to the emergency room twice in the past month, she said. I m exhausted from not sleeping well, having constant headaches, and chronic pain. I ve seen MDs, naturopaths, and even an acupuncturist, she said with exasperation. I never feel well, and I know I m letting my children and husband down. The doctors have not been much help, and after all the tests and all the appointments, nothing really clears up my problems. I never feel well.
This is a story I m hearing with much greater frequency, so I ve become more equipped to ask better questions. I ask more specifically about symptoms, women s journeys to find healing, and the profound discouragement and guilt they feel when answers aren t found.
The medical doctors tend to want to prescribe drugs or refer me for more tests with another doctor. That s why I m here. They ve decided I need to consider this might all be in my head since they can t find anything specifically wrong with me. I ve gone from being angry at them to being angry with myself. So now I blame myself and feel guilty for everything-from the way I m schooling my children down to how I keep the house. I just want to know what s going on with me. I m not making this up. I can barely make it through the day. Are the doctors right? I don t know what to believe.
So what have you done to cope? I asked.
The only thing I know how to do. I ve gone on a search, mostly on the Internet, looking for what might be wrong.
And?
Well, the only thing that comes up over and over is stress. I am so embarrassed. Is it just stress? Who doesn t have stress in their lives? she asked.
Tell me a little about where you think you experience stress, I prompted.
Connie went on to tell me about her husband, Charles, and his constant criticism of her.
Nothing is good enough for him, she said. He runs our home like an extension of his job. He s a bulldog. He always justifies his actions, blaming the kids and me for everything. He s never wrong. He s never satisfied. I find myself falling out of love with him and feel incredibly guilty about that. She paused, then quietly added, Oh, my gosh, I think my marriage is killing me.
Stress Is the Real Story
How could her marriage be killing her? This had to be hyperbole. I must admit that at first I wondered about women like Connie. Stress is stress, after all. I ve had a ton of stress in my life and never gotten sick from it. My sons, who cowrote this book with me, have experienced more stress in medical school and residencies than the average person, and they ve never gotten sick.
How could her marriage be killing her?
The answer really does lie in the simple word: Stress . But how can this be? Because we all handle stress differently. While some handle stress by eating too much, drinking too much, or escaping into paperback novels, others get physically sick. Some thrive on stress-stress they can manage-while others become debilitated by it.
But make no mistake. Stress can kill us. Stress can elevate our blood pressure to dangerous levels. Stress can create anxiety, as it has in my life, or can cause us to be aggravated and irritated. Stress hides in many different places, behind many facades. Just because it appears as if someone is handling the pressures of life, it doesn t necessarily mean they are.
Stress has been called a silent killer. Perhaps you ve heard that. But how is that possible? Stress is just a normal part of everyday life, right?
Yes and no.
Stress can be as simple as being late for a lunch date, or it can be massive and chronic from living in an abusive marriage. It can be fleeting and pass as quickly as it came, or it can linger with unending and horrifyingly destructive abuse. When stress hormones get out of whack, signaling the brain there is lurking danger, we either change our world and cope effectively, or as is the case of many reading this book, experience debilitating health problems.
So what is the bottom line? The bottom line is that stress can kill. It kills by negatively affecting our autoimmune systems, possibly leading to cancer. It kills by leading to atherosclerosis, which in turn could possibly lead to a heart attack. It kills by being linked to trauma, which leads to major depressive and anxiety disorders, leading to a loss of happiness and quality of life. It kills by attacking our heart and soul-the very core of our being.
This book will show you beyond a shadow of a doubt that stress can be simple or complex, easily remedied or, more often, very hard to treat. Either way, please read on and journey with me to discover more about that stress that kills your heart and soul-your marriage and your self.
Imagine
Imagine a time recently when you felt ill. Perhaps a bad cold or the flu had gotten you down. You were really sick. You couldn t work or focus on anything but how bad you felt. Canceling your appointments, you went to bed, hoping to recuperate quickly.
Fortunately you knew this illness would likely last only a few days. You reassured your employer you would be back soon. You told your family to make do without you. Buying yourself a bit of time, you pulled the covers over your head and slept.
Now