Summary of Dr. Sue Johnson's Love Sense

Everest Media

Description

Please note: This is a companion version & not the original book.
Sample Book Insights:
#1 My memories are full of the sounds and sights of love: the ache in my elderly grandmother’s voice when she spoke of her husband, gone nearly fifty years, a railway signalman who had courted her for seven years.
#2 Love is a mystery that has eluded everyone throughout history. It is a mix of four components: intimacy, passion, commitment, and nature’s reproductive strategy. But for us who are trying to find or keep love, these definitions are useless.
#3 The most important building block of any society, the family unit, is now based on feelings of affection and emotional connection. This has been the case since the 1990s, when women began entering the workforce and marrying for love.
#4 The nature of love is important to understand, as it is the most intimate relationship we have as adults. It is also the principal relationship for many, and the only one.

Sujets

• Sciences et techniques
• Clinical
• Chemistry
• Science

Informations

• Publié par: Everest Media LLC
• Date de parution: 10 mai 2022
• Nombre de lectures: 1
• EAN13: 9798822503151
• Langue: English
• Poids de l'ouvrage: 1 Mo

Extrait

Insights on Dr. Sue Johnson's Love Sense
Contents Insights from Chapter 1 Insights from Chapter 2 Insights from Chapter 3 Insights from Chapter 4
Insights from Chapter 1

#1

My memories are full of the sounds and sights of love: the ache in my elderly grandmother’s voice when she spoke of her husband, gone nearly fifty years, a railway signalman who had courted her for seven years.

#2

Love is a mystery that has eluded everyone throughout history. It is a mix of four components: intimacy, passion, commitment, and nature’s reproductive strategy. But for us who are trying to find or keep love, these definitions are useless.

#3

The most important building block of any society, the family unit, is now based on feelings of affection and emotional connection. This has been the case since the 1990s, when women began entering the workforce and marrying for love.

#4

The nature of love is important to understand, as it is the most intimate relationship we have as adults. It is also the principal relationship for many, and the only one.

#5

The field of social sciences has revolutionized its approach to studying love. Emotions, which were once considered to be irrational and suspect, are now being studied and understood.

#6

The new love sense is not only theoretical but also practical and optimistic. It illuminates why we love and reveals how we can make, repair, and keep love.

#7

The human brain and nervous system are wired with an automatic call-and-response system that keeps parents and children emotionally attached to each other. When a baby boy cries from hunger, his mother picks him up and feeds him.

#8

The need to depend on one person never disappears as we grow up. We simply transfer that need from our primary caregiver to our lover. Romantic love is not the least bit random or illogical. It is the continuation of an ordered and wise recipe for our survival.

#9

We have it backwards when it comes to sex and romantic love. It is not good sex that leads to satisfying, secure relationships, but rather secure love that leads to good and, in fact, the best sex.

#10

We are designed to need emotional connections to survive. We see this clear example in the cross-species combinations we mentioned earlier: in Thailand, a tiger adopts baby pigs; in China, a dog nurses lion cubs; in Colombia, a cat cares for a squirrel.

#11

Close connection is the strongest predictor of happiness, and it lessens susceptibility to anxiety and depression. It also makes us more resilient against stress and trauma.

#12

Love is not limiting, but rather expanding our options and experiences. It is hard to be open to new experiences when our attention and energy are bound up in worry about our safety.

#13

We are a naturally empathetic species. We are not born callous and competitive, but caring and cooperative. Our brains are wired to read the faces of others and to resonate with what we see there.

#14

The new science has given us a unified field theory of love. We now know what a good love relationship looks and feels like, and we can shape it. For the first time, we have a map that can guide us in creating, healing, and sustaining love.

#15

The basis of love is not just intellectual insight into each other’s relationship history, but emotional connection. To really help couples find happiness, we must shore up the foundation of their relationship, which is emotional connection.

#16

The results of EFT, as measured in a multitude of studies, have been astoundingly positive - better than the outcomes of any other therapy. It goes to the heart of the matter, and it is effective because it taps into our deepest human emotions.

#17

If you want to respond to someone, imagine their face in your mind’s eye. Then, call them and see how you do it. If you call, how do you do it. What does your voice sound like. When someone comes, what does he do. Does he express concern, offer comfort and reassurance, and stay with you so that you can relax and let yourself be comforted.

#18

The expectations we have for a relationship affect our steps in that relationship. They are our own love story.

#19

Love relationships are not rational bargains, but rather bonds between two people. They are not like corporate alliances or government alliances, but rather like the ones between mother and child.

#20

John Bowlby, a British psychiatrist, is the father of attachment theory, a developmental perspective on personality that puts our emotions and our interactions with loved ones front and center in terms of who we are and how we behave.

#21

The revolution in child care came from the observation of responses and patterns of interaction between mother and child. It took John Bowlby to really understand the importance of these facts. He was a physician and psychoanalyst, and he found himself in conflict with analytic orthodoxy, which held that patients’ problems were internal.

#22

Bowlby’s work on child development marked a break with accepted dictum. He believed that the emotional tie between mother and child is wired in before birth, and that it is automatic. He believed that parents should be allowed to stay with their hospitalized children, as they were not allowed to visit them in previous studies.

#23

The theory of attachment was developed by British psychologist John Bowlby. It describes the four elements of attachment: we seek out, monitor, and try to maintain emotional and physical connection with our loved ones. We become extremely upset when they are physically or emotionally remote.

#24

The Strange Situation is an experiment that shows how children react when their mothers leave them alone for a few minutes. The children who are resilient and calm themselves quickly, easily reconnect with their moms, and resume exploratory play.

#25

The idea that adults need to attach continues beyond childhood, and it has been proven that romantic love is an attachment bond. We habitually seek and maintain physical and emotional closeness with at least one particular person, and we especially seek out this person when we feel stressed or anxious.

#26

We all have a basic attachment style that was formed in childhood.