Urban Falconer

Roy Thomson

Description

During lockdown people got up to all kinds of odd antics. This octogenarian from Edinburgh found himself irresistibly drawn into writing humorous verses. This diversion developed rapidly into what could only be described as a kind of 'rhymer's eurhythmics'. Humorous poems of all shapes and sizes appeared almost daily. They leapfrogged in topic from Midgies to Boris Johnston, an urban falconer to a gender PC, a ripe Brie to the House of Lords, a gamester to ancient schoolmasters. The outcome of all this is The Urban Falconer, a collection of humorous poems full of wackiness and charm, written in a distinctive narrative voice and from a singular perspective. They are amusing, appealing and even thought provoking. A wonderful relief from feelings of present day glumness for readers of all kinds - even those who 'never read poetry'.

Sujets

• Poetry
• Humour

Informations

• Publié par: Troubador Publishing Ltd
• Date de parution: 14 septembre 2022
• Nombre de lectures: 0
• EAN13: 9781803133614
• Langue: English

Extrait

Copyright © 2022 Roy Thomson

The moral right of the author has been asserted.

Apart from any fair dealing for the purposes of research or private study, or criticism or review, as permitted under the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988, this publication may only be reproduced, stored or transmitted, in any form or by any means, with the prior permission in writing of the publishers, or in the case of reprographic reproduction in accordance with the terms of licences issued by the Copyright Licensing Agency. Enquiries concerning reproduction outside those terms should be sent to the publishers.

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ISBN 9781803133614

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A catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library.

Matador is an imprint of Troubador Publishing Ltd



For my wife, Janette


Contents
Acknowledgements

INCIDENTS
Cheesewise
Odd Jobbing
Art For Her Sake
Parsing Of The Ways
P..Leisure
Wish You Were Here
Algorithmic Dancing
Acting Maxim
A Matter of Taste
Singles Minded
Musical Theatre

ODD BODS
Quit Grousing
Bower Power
A Snore You Can’t Ignore
The Sad Prince
The Wrong Tenor
Exhibitionism
Reality Check
The Diffident Traveller
Bill
Mad Hatters
Musical Elements
Hobbyist

CREATURES
The Urban Falconer
Catty Asides
Education for All
Vermin
Indelicat
Pigeon – With Apologies
Unfit for Duty
The Rings of a Dove
A Prickly Conundrum
The Poultry Keeper’s Cry
Yap Dog
Sea Shanty

ASIDES
The August Chamber
Parenting
Today’s Agender
Misandry?
Avoirdupois
What Is This Life
Indoor Type
Monetary Advice
Viva España
Conturbat Me
What’s In a Name?
Dubito

MORE ODD BODS
What’s-Her-Name…?
Dr Good-For-You
Neighbourly Advice
Octogenarian
P.M....?
Seeing’s Believing
The Teeth of a Storm
Dear Jane
Not Abreast of these Times
A Batchelor’s Garden Peas
Gertie
The Song is Not Ended
Flagrancy
Blunt Dresser
Tex

LIT BITS
Sad Sonneteer
Learning by Rote
Poetic Injustice?
P C Prosody
The Scholar
White Spirit
Bookishness
Nepoetism?
Oxfam-ous
Poetic Indifference
Poetaster
Balladhunger
Come All You Celebs
Whan that Aprille
Sticks and Stones

SCOTS CORNER
Postcard Scot
Jaunty Jimmy
McLeod
Three Schoolmasters of Old
Nomenclatorture
A Little Learning
Midgies
Yestreen
Nox et Diem
A View from Morningside, Edinburgh
Wee Freeze
Forecast for Scotland
Elie House Owner
McTavish’s Revenge


Acknowledgements
My thanks to all members of my family for their unstinting support during the pandemic when these poems were being written.
My thanks to Ross and Keith Thomson for their help in preparing these poems for printing.
Thanks to Janette Thomson for unflagging encouragement and support.
And finally, a mention for Tessa and Anna Ogilvie who would never forgive me if I didn’t.



INCIDENTS


Cheesewise
My birthday present – given late –
A Brie, well past its sell-by date.
I travelled home quite unaware
When passers-by began to stare,
But waiting in the long bus queue
When people sniffed and checked their shoe –
I knew…..

My bus arrived – the 24
With people crowded to the door.
Perhaps because I’m small and thin
The driver shrugged…..and let me in.
My fe