Beautiful Disaster

Makayla Brooke

Description

A debut collection of poetry and prose that holds truth, love, hope, and a wake-up call for anyone feeling alone, broken, or lost in life.
If you knew what went on
in my mind,
I wonder if you’d lose yours too.


It took a long time for Makayla Brooke to understand that her personal experiences could be filled with both beauty and ugliness and, most importantly, poetic insight.



Within her debut collection of poems, Makayla reflects on a variety of themes and subjects that include heartbreak, abuse, grief, trauma, and much more. As she lyrically explores how she learned to find her way in a complex world and heal from her emotional wounds, Makayla shares a raw glimpse into her beautiful disaster as she bravely faced difficulties, attempted to overcome seemingly insurmountable obstacles, and focused on creating a new beginning with every sunrise.



Beautiful Disaster is a debut collection of poetry and prose that holds truth, love, hope, and a wake-up call for anyone feeling alone, broken, or lost in life.

Sujets

• Poetry

Informations

• Publié par: Archway Publishing
• Date de parution: 18 mars 2021
• Nombre de lectures: 1
• EAN13: 9781665704236
• Langue: English

Extrait

Beautiful Disaster
A Collection of Poetry and Prose
 

 
Makayla Brooke
 
 
 
 
 
 

 
Copyright © 2021 Makayla Brooke.
 
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the author except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.
 
This book is a work of non-fiction. Unless otherwise noted, the author and the publisher make no explicit guarantees as to the accuracy of the information contained in this book and in some cases, names of people and places have been altered to protect their privacy.
 
Archway Publishing
1663 Liberty Drive
Bloomington, IN 47403
www.archwaypublishing.com
844-669-3957
 
Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.
 
Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Getty Images are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.
Certain stock imagery © Getty Images.
 
Interior Image Credit: Makayla Brooke
 
ISBN: 978-1-6657-0422-9 (sc)
ISBN: 978-1-6657-0423-6 (e)
 
Library of Congress Control Number: 2021905100
 
 
Archway Publishing rev. date: 07/22/2022
CONTENTS
A Note to My Readers
Acknowledgments
I’m Fine
Moonlit Sky
Second Chance
Miles
Rory Gilmore
Rabbit Hole/My Mistake
Fireworks
Blue
Once upon a Time Part 1
Once upon a Time Part 2
The Anniversary
An Apology to a Loved One
Hazel Eyes
I’m in Love with You
Winter Dream
Clean
Best Friends
Ocean Eyes
She Told Me
Maybe
Why?
Remember
Cut the Cord
Rise and Set
Jacket
Arizona
I Love You
A Letter to a Friend
A NOTE TO MY READERS
This book holds so much of myself. The fact that I finally wrote it means absolutely everything to me. You mean absolutely everything to me. I have never been particularly good at showing my feelings, but it’s always been freeing when I could put together words on paper. I discovered my love for books and writing when I was only six years old; it was then I knew I wanted to be a writer. I also knew it wouldn’t be easy. Trust me, there were so many times I wanted to throw in the towel and put this dream of mine aside, but something never felt right when I attempted to do so. It took me such a long time to understand there can be beauty and ugliness throughout life. The good doesn’t always necessarily mean that there will be no bad, and vice versa. Writing is a part of me. These words you are holding in front of you are a part of me. I hope these pages hold something for you—whether it be truth, hope, love, a friend, or a wake-up call. Remember you are not alone. Remember you can do this. I hope you enjoy my beautiful disaster.
For the people who never let me quit my dreams
and the ones who told me I should.
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
There are so many thanks I have to give for making this book—this dream—possible. I’d like to thank every café where I spent endless hours scribbling down words to create something beautifully disastrous. I’d like to thank the people who pushed me through my doubts, and even the ones who told me to give up; sometimes that was just the push I needed. I want to thank my dad for supporting that his only child wanted to be a writer, and always filling me with faith and encouragement. You’re my hero, and the best dad anyone could ask for. I’d like to thank my grandma for looking down on me and watching over me through everything. I’d like to thank my best friend for never giving up on me, no matter how frustrating or shitty the decisions I made in the past were: for always supporting me and my dreams; for all the coffee, french fries, jam sessions, and midnight car rides it took to make the writer’s block vanish from my brain and give my creativity a reason to come alive again. I love you all more than I can even begin to describe.
I want to thank all of you who made this possible, especially all of you who read this book—who saw Beautiful Disaster and knew it was just what you needed to realize you are not alone. This is for you. I hope to give you many more books in the future. This life is short. Follow your dreams.
 
Trigger Warning
This book contains sensitive material relating to:
• Intimate partner abuse
• Bullying
• Sexual assault
• Self-harm
• Alcoholism
• Trauma
• Drug abuse
• Death
• Suicide
• Grief
• Breakups
• Heartbreak
and possibly more.
They say the eyes
Are the windows to the soul.
Too bad my sanity
Was the only thing you stole.
Espresso and bourbon.
Hot tea and whiskey.
I’m Fine

I say I’m fine
As many times as you cut your pathetic lines.
I really lost you to drugs this time.
I’m fine.
I’ve had about a thousand sleepless nights waiting for you to change your mind.
I’m fine.
Waiting for you to say,
“Will you be mine?”
I’m fine.
I’ve never quite understood what’s so divine about being alone
when all I want is you by my side.
I’m fine.
Tried to leave you in the past,
I should’ve known that wouldn’t last fucking long.
I’m fine.
I’m about to break.
I could jump right off this bridge.
I’m fine.
To get some silence in my fucked-up mind,
I’m fine.
It was your
brown eyes
that left me
hypnotized.
She sang to her love
because when he spoke,
she heard a melody.
Darling,
you’re the music in me.
Moonlit Sky

You’ve intoxicated my body and mind
more than the liquor and drugs I use to numb the memories of us.
I shouldn’t want you.
Kiss me under the moonlit sky,
so
I don’t cry for yet another night.
Kiss me under the moonlit sky,
so
I don’t have to endure another inebriated, sleepless night.
I’m too drunk to drive.
Come hold me tonight,
I beg of you.
I only see the best in you.
Darling,
don’t lie.
I’m too tired to cry.
When I saw you with her,
I felt so much pain,
so much hurt.
 
I didn’t want to say goodbye,
but you looked me straight in the eye.
You kissed her.
I thought I might die,
crumbling completely on the inside.
Everything turned to mush.
I was yelling,
but I knew I should hush my mouth
to the hateful words I knew I’d spout off.
Tell me why you had to make me believe
you didn’t want to break it off.
That you wanted to start over.
Did you love her?
You didn’t even apologize.
Is that how low you think of me?
I’m not surprised you’re one of “those” guys.
Maybe I was naïve,
but I’m holding on for dear life.
Kiss me under the moonlit sky,
and everything will be all right.
It’s crazy when you lose yourself
as if you’re dead;
just a robot
doing what everyone thinks you should.
Everyone is fragile about something.
The universe is very tricky.
Love is very tricky.
I swear somewhere they invented us for their own entertainment.
The reality of it all
is that we shouldn’t worry about anything
because nobody knows what the hell they’re doing anyway.
Your mind amazes me
like Paris amazes hopeless romantics.
Your eyes captivate me
like the stars at night.
I’m not sure what fate is doing,
but I’m sure it’s right.
Beauty
isn’t what we cannot feel
but what we do not see.
I never thought I’d miss it;
I guess I’m just addicted.
You’re my fucking kryptonite, and
I
h a t e
it.
You never made me talk to you when I was upset.
You’d just lie next to me,
Hold my hand,
Kiss my forehead.
This was all new to me,
Not being pressured to open up
But knowing I could any time I wanted.
You felt so much like home
For someone I’ve barely gotten to know.