George and Gracie

Al Ferber

Description

No About the Book information available at this time.

Sujets

• Poet
• Poetry
• Life
• Humour

Informations

• Publié par: Xlibris US
• Date de parution: 10 juillet 2023
• Nombre de lectures: 0
• EAN13: 9798369402801
• Langue: English

Extrait

George and Gracie
the musical
Al Ferber

Copyright © 2023 by Al Ferber.
 
ISBN:
Softcover
979-8-3694-0279-5
 
eBook
979-8-3694-0280-1
 
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the copyright owner.
 
Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Getty Images are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.
Certain stock imagery © Getty Images.
 
Cover Art & photo by Cathi Ferber
Cover design by Al Ferber
 
 
 
 
 
 
Rev. date: 07/10/2023
 
 
 
 
 
Xlibris
844-714-8691
www.Xlibris.com
851516
Contents
Acknowledgements
Introduction
George & Gracie
The Way It Is
Wedded Bliss
The Drunk Years
Some How Some Way
Turns Out
Head Doctor
First Date ???
Bully Stick
Tracks
Passed Out Face Down
Out Of The Chair
Christmas Trees
Just The Other Evening
Path To Enlightenment
Did I Say That
Walking
Followers
She’s Got A Talent
Crs
Celebration
He Say She Say
He Married A Mechanic
Roll With It
Jump Jump
Not Long
Discovery
The Music
Too Many Choices
Far Be It From Me
Wedding Vows
The Pow Wow
Magic 8 Ball
Dance To The Music
Blind & Tone Deaf
Bing Bang Bing Bang
Phone Call
Excitement Excitement
She Did
Indicted
Asshole
The Sack
Romantic
Say What ?
Blossom
One Thing
Love
Shall I
The Look
There Were Signs
Prerequisite Skills
Forget It
Long Time
Oo Daddy Daddy
One Off
Bull
Sculptor
Pirate
“Aye Yai Yai”
Just Joking
Daughter
He Tells Her
Two Clowns In Love
Eyes
Puzzle
What’s Wrong
In Bed
Duel Diagnoses
It Was Just A Joke
Wine & Cheese
Hey Honey
The Card
Weather Lady
I Met Her
Close Enough
Upon First Meeting
Cheese Itz
More Often
She Makes Lists
400 Miles
Secret Of Success
Processing
The Balloon Lady
All Hail Broke Loose
My Dealer
So She Asked
She Does
Food Chain
Commingle
Confession
Paradise Lost
Pooch Poop
Pop Quiz
The Eyes Have It
Soul Snatcher
Now I Get It
Change
Never Seen Anything Like That Before
Shaking Shitless
Progress
She Feeds Me
Reminder
My Life
So I Told Him
The Paintings
Thought Less
The Time
Venetian Blind
The Day Of
Sliding Down The Tubes
My Dad
Yet Again
Hey
Anything
Maybe
Few
Two Words
In The Trenches
The Beat Life
Notice
Hiccups
Acquired Taste
Newza-Mania
Advantage
Calming Breeze
I Am He
Bury Me
The Air
Decorum
Kids
Rain
I Do, Damn It
Some People
Distractions
Big Girl
Signposts
Intrusion
Pedestrians
There Are Times
Dig A Hole
Masks & Dances
Come Inna My House
Chuck
Wings
Brave Young Patriots
The Nature Of Stars
Intolerance
Indigenous People
Breeze
Inside The Cracker Jacks Box
Silence Is Golden
What If
What Then
Cast Aside
Cackle & Caw
And Just
Let It Be
The End
One Person
From Ms Stein
Drunk Or Sober
We Both Know
Chocolate Chip
Nap Time
Go For It
Strange Brew
A Difference
Water Buffalos
Twilight Zone
What A Trip
On My Mind
We, Us
Recycle Recycle Recycling
Kicking Ass On The Golden Mile
No More Inventory
Some Neighborhood
The Two Time Heretic
Politics & Polemics
Why ?
No. 1 In Erections
Down The Road
Footnote To Everything
Adult Book Store
Down In The Alley Again
My Favorite Movie
Chink
City Of Dreams
Floral Arrangement
Namaste
Viva La Revolution
Penis Envy
Walmart
Some Things
The Music
Name Drops
Drainage Ditch
Internal Corruption Engine
Faces On A Carousel
Also By Al Ferber
Acknowledgements
Some of these poems have previously appeared in Mangle/zine and are reprinted here with my permission the author, Al Ferber editor & publisher of Mangle/zine.

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
For Cathi -
the greatest show on earth
Introduction
Fasten seat belts. That's no a request.
George & Gracie
She's a wise ass
that's why
he married her
he's a wise ass
that's why
she married him
a dangerous
combustible
combination
that could go
sideways at
the drop
of a dead cat
thirty five years
together
headed for
anyone's guess
and they're both
still alive
their only question
"Where, oh where
did we go wrong ?"
The Way It Is
The sun is out
and shining,
the evergreens
are still green,
she's is flitting
around
the planet, and
he's sitting on
his ass
waiting for
Armageddon
to begin.
Wedded Bliss
Shortly after they exchanged
marital vows they
began to morph into Edward
Albee's George & Martha
for periods of mortal combat
bouts of heated character
assassination and mutual
degradation
with Martha flinging random
household items in his direction
leading George to take refuge
in the bathroom
locking the door behind him
then just as quickly morph
back to George & Gracie
The Drunk Years
George spent the first
ten years
of their glorious escapade
as a functional alcoholic
which uncovered
hidden talents that he had
or didn't have or he didn't care
if he had them or not
and just went ahead and did
plumbing work electrical work
and construction work
around the house
miraculously all of this work
turned out fine and dandy
once he got sober he had
no clue how he'd done any of it
Some How Some Way
One of his psychiatrists posited
she had put up
with his sorry ass
because he made her laugh
and that made her think
the son of a bitch was worth
saving in spite
of Christmas trees occasionally
hitting the ground mysteriously
he taking the occasional
nose dive into the parking lot
and
other wonderful tricks like that
Turns Out
You'd never know it but
she was particularly
well suited to deal with
the relatively odd aspects
of his
mental anomalies
she'd spent her entire
teaching
children with brain trauma.
as often as not
she tricked him into
eventually doing
the right god damn thing
Head Doctor
Off to the city
to see my other
head doctor to try
to make sense
of whatever
it is that has been
rocking my world
besides Gracie.
First Date ???
She grilled the poor bastard
over dinner:
"Are you now or have you
ever been a member of
the Philanthropist Party?"
"What's your
favorite discoloration ?"
"Do you wear tennis shoes
or flip flops
when you shower ?"
 
Outside the restaurant
she tried to stab him with
his own umbrella.
 
When he pulled up in front
of her apartment he leaned
over to kiss her only to find
that she'd fallen sleep
Bully Stick
She gives her daughter
dog
a bully stick for a treat
of course it is no longer
attached to the bull
it's just
the poor bastards stick
that she gives
to her daughter dog
to sniff and lick and
chew on until
the bully stick is
completely gone just
like the rest of the bull
she says it's good for
cleaning the dog's teeth
Tracks
He asked where do
you want to go
to dinner
She said I don't know
maybe
I'll have
a brain drizzle
Passed Out Face Down
She came home
to find him drunk
yet again
passed out face down
on the
dining room floor
shook him until
he opened his eyes
he