Man a Plan a Canal Panama

Fletcher David

Description

Neither Brian nor Sandra knew whether there was a longer palindrome than 'a man a plan a canal Panama', but they did know that the country in this palindrome was well worth a visit. Not only did it house a whole treasure-house of wildlife riches, but it also had that extremely well-known canal. Furthermore, it presented them with the opportunity to travel through this canal on a splendid catamaran with just a handful of other people. So, off they both went to discover for themselves what Panama held, and how far this isthmus nation matched up to their guide book's description. Was it all green and lovely or was it a bit more 'lived-in' in certain respects?Oh, and was that canal all it was cracked up to be?Well, A Man a Plan a Canal Panama answers these questions - and does a hell of a lot more. For example, it examines the hardships Brian suffered as a result of his being billeted in a giant Coke can and the discomfiture he endured from having to dance with a half-naked (full-breasted) girl.Then there is what others had to ensure as a result of his habit of sounding off about all sorts of stuff, including the devaluation of degrees and the raising of the voting age to thirty-two. And various other similarly unprejudiced ideas...

Sujets

• Travel writing

Informations

• Publié par: Troubador Publishing Ltd
• Date de parution: 09 juillet 2019
• Nombre de lectures: 0
• EAN13: 9781838599447
• Langue: English
• Poids de l'ouvrage: 12 Mo

Extrait

Copyright © 2019 David Fletcher

The moral right of the author has been asserted.


Apart from any fair dealing for the purposes of research or private study, or criticism or review, as permitted under the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988, this publication may only be reproduced, stored or transmitted, in any form or by any means, with the prior permission in writing of the publishers, or in the case of reprographic reproduction in accordance with the terms of licences issued by the Copyright Licensing Agency. Enquiries concerning reproduction outside those terms should be sent to the publishers.


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ISBN 978 1838599 447

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For Maggie and Lynette
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By the same author:

2018
1.
With the help of KLM, Brian and Sandra had successfully managed to navigate their way from deepest Worcestershire to Tocumen International Airport on the outskirts of Panama City. Unfortunately, the driver of their transfer vehicle was having less success in navigating his way from the airport to their first scheduled lodge. In fact, when he finally undertook a U-turn on an anonymous tree-lined road, Brian decided that he was pretty well entirely lost.
Nevertheless, Brian was not unduly concerned. After all, Panama, as he knew, was not a very big country, and sooner or later their driver would no doubt track down their destination. Just as long, that is, as he remembered that Panama does not run from north to south, but instead from west to east. Not many people, Brian suspected, knew this, but it was simply a product of the geography of the New World. Put another way, if Panama ran south from its Central American neighbour, Costa Rica (rather than east), its lower bit would easily miss Colombia and its contiguous arrangement with South America would be completely scuppered. It would also mean, of course, that there would be a wide navigable channel between Panama and Colombia – and no need for the Panama Canal!
That would be pretty serious for Panama’s economy, and it would also undermine the legitimacy of one of the longest palindromes in the world. That is to say that ‘a man a plan a canal Panama’ would essentially lose its meaning, and Brian would have to cast around for another equally impressive palindromic marvel. Which, of course, was all irrelevant stuff, but just the sort of musings that could infect Brian’s mind when he was tired from a transatlantic flight and unsure of when he might be delivered to a much-needed bar-equipped refuge.
In any event, it soon transpired that the driver hadn’t so much lost his way as momentarily mislaid it. Or maybe it was just that along that anonymous tree-lined road, there was only one turn-off that held out any prospect of his finding their lodge. So, having taken that unscheduled U-turn, he took this turn-off with only the slightest of hesitations. And it was, in fact, the beginning of a thin, winding road that went up and up and then up and up even further. Quite clearly, our two new visitors to Panama were being taken up a very large hill through the middle of a dense forest to what could only be their planned destination for today: the ‘world-famous’ Canopy Tower eco-lodge.
This lodge, Brian knew, was going to be interesting in its own right. And this was because it had started life not as an eco-destination but as a military installation. It had been built by the United States Air Force in 1965 to house a powerful radar used in the defence of the Panama Canal. Thereafter it also took on a role in air traffic control and ultimately it played a part in detecting aeroplanes carrying drugs from South America. However, by 1995 it had become redundant, so that when in the following year its ownership passed from the USA to Panama, it was just an empty vacant building and it had to find itself a new role. This wasn’t too difficult. Perched on the top of a hill with commanding views of the magnificent Soberania National Park within which it was located, it could only become one of the best situated eco-lodges in the world. It was not only in the right place, but its tower construction provided it with the sort of accommodation that would place its guests within the forest canopy itself. They would be only metres away from a multitude of both birds and animals. So, that’s what happened. It was inaugurated as a lodge in 1999, since which time it has become a centre for neotropical-rainforest observation and eco-tourism like no other in the country. And, as Brian and Sandra were about to find out, its ‘like no other in the country’ credentials weren’t necessarily exclusively good credentials…
They both got their first idea of the possibly negative aspects of a radar tower turned into an eco-lodge when the Tower first came into view. It was located within what looked like a copy of the original wire-fenced military compound (complete with military warning signs) – and it looked like a giant Coca-Cola can with an equally giant ping pong on its top (and to be entirely pedantic, that is like a giant Coca-Cola Life can – the lower-calorie version of Coke that comes in a green can). Yes, the Canopy Tower was a big, green metal can – with windows in its sides, a big white sphere on its top, and with the very definite promise of a novel, not to say unique, experience within.
It didn’t disappoint. The reception area, beyond a small, functional front door, had the air of an aircraft hangar, but one that had been pressganged into an alien use. Its entirely metal construction could not be concealed, and the installation of a rudimentary reception desk and a large ‘naïve-style’ mural depicting colourful examples of the local colourful wildlife only accentuated its workmanlike essence. Oh, and it was the shape of the inside of a can and there wasn’t anybody behind the reception desk. All in all, it was an unusual, slightly disturbing and not very welcoming vestibule, and it certainly housed nothing from which a thirsty traveller might furnish himself – or herself – with some suitably stimulating refreshment.
This last feature of the reception area made it vital that Brian and Sandra should find someone to acknowledge their arrival, and with the help of their driver this someone was eventually found. He was a young chap who spoke very little English, but who was able to show his new visitors to their room – on the second floor – and to the lounge-cum-dining-area on the third floor. Both their room and the communal space at the top of the building succeeded in maintaining the lodge’s novel-interior reputation.
Their room was a truncated segment of the tower, with a sliver to one side that contained a shower and those other pieces of porcelain that are necessary to maintain a clean and comfortable existence. In the principal segment bit there were two beds, a couple of chairs, a desk and a hammock, and everywhere there was (very carefully-painted) metal. This formed the floor, the ceiling, the external walls – and those parts of the internal walls that weren’t made up of old-fashioned wooden louvred panels. The overall ambience was of a steerage cabin on the Titanic, albeit one with windows and with too much space, and the overall concern of its new inhabitants was its acoustic characteristics. Would a bare metal room in a big metal can afford them any protection against the sounds of their shared accommodation?
By the time they had explored the lounge-cum-dining-area, this question had been answered. There seemed to be only three other guests in the lodge at the moment, but wherever one was in the building one would be aware of their individual whereabouts. The metal construction of the tower not only failed to insulate against sound, but it also served to amplify sound. Indeed, so much so that Brian suggested to Sandra that the Canopy Tower had probably not ever in its life hosted a successful union between a man and a woman – even if they’d tried it in one of the thoughtfully provided capacious hammocks.
However, it was gratification of another sort that was on Brian’s mind at the moment, and having inspected the dining and lounging arrangements and having established that there was a bar – in the form of a help-yourself fridge packed with booze – he proceeded to achieve this gratification with a can of beer (and not with a can of Coca-Cola Life). Sandra joined him in this pursuit and then the two of them joined one of their fellow guests to explore the observation deck at the top of the tower.
This fellow guest was a German guy by the name of Christof – who turned out to be not only a very friendly German but also an outstanding wildlife artist – and the observation deck turned out to be outstanding full stop. It ran around the outside of the big ping pong ball and it provided a literally panoramic view of much of the tree-covered Soberania National Park as well as some enticing views of the abundant birdlife in the nearby trees. It was spellbinding and on its own well worth exposing oneself to the prospect of a less than serene (and likely celibate) environment for three days and nights.
The evening meal wasn’t quite so spellbinding. Indeed, the food was dull and the company was worse than dull; it was essentially non-existent. While Brian and Sandra had earlier met a nice American couple, these