Women and Recovery

Kitty Harris

Description

A breakthrough recovery plan for women who struggle with alcoholism, based on a groundbreaking new model

Tens of millions of women today drink to excess and their numbers are growing. Now Dr. Kitty Harris, an experienced counselor and therapist who is herself a recovering alcoholic with more than thirty years of sobriety, presents a new model for recovery that focuses on treating the pain in women's lives that can lead to a vicious cycle of addiction?not on the shame that fuels it. Combining her personal and professional experience, Dr. Harris offers tools that can help women who want to recover as well as friends or family members who are seeking help for a loved one.

• Focuses on dealing with the pain associated with alcoholism in women, not reinforcing the shame
• Discusses the different types of female drinking habits, including binge drinking and drunkorexia
• Takes a plain-language, jargon-free approach that is easy to understand and shares the stories of recovering women of all ages and from all walks of life
• Is written by Dr. Kitty Harris, Director of The Center for the Study of Addiction and Recovery at Texas Tech University, with twenty-five years of private clinical experience working with adults and adolescents

Acknowledgments ix

Introduction 1

Part One Women Who Drink Too Much

Quiz: Alcohol IQ 5

1 My Story 7

2 Where Does It Hurt? 20

3 Closet Drinkers 38

4 Barhopping 48

5 Binge Drinking 56

6 When Mothers Drink 72

7 Drunkorexia 85

8 When Bad Things Happen to Drunk Women 96

Part Two Breaking the Cycle of Addiction

Quiz: The Audit Test 134

9 Choosing Life over Liquor 138

10 Recovery Strategies 147

11 Staying Sober: Alcoholics Anonymous and Other Programs 168

12 Family Matters 188

Afterword 210

Getting Help: Resources for Recovery 213

Bibliography 225

Index 231

Sujets

• Substance Abuse
• Self-help
• Addictions
• Alcohol

Informations

• Publié par: Turner Publishing Company
• Date de parution: 07 mai 2012
• Nombre de lectures: 2
• EAN13: 9781118217351
• Langue: English

Extrait

Contents
Cover
Endorsement
Title Page
Copyright
Dedication
Acknowledgments
Introduction
Part One: Women Who Drink Too Much
Quiz: Alcohol IQ
Chapter 1: My Story
An Idyllic Childhood
My Recovery
Chapter 2: Where Does It Hurt?
The Five Types of Pain
Quiz: Identify Your Pain
Chapter 3: Closet Drinkers
Coming Out
Leaving the Past Behind
Chapter 4: Barhopping
Triggers for Barhoppers
Chapter 5: Binge Drinking
The Teenage Brain
Triggers Points for Binge Drinkers
What Can Parents Do?
Behavior Contracts
Chapter 6: When Mothers Drink
Chapter 7: Drunkorexia
Women as Marketing Targets
Drunkorexia’s Roots in Addiction
Liquids Are Easier to Purge
Alcohol—a Weighty Issue
Do You Have an Eating Disorder?
Support for Drunkorexics
Chapter 8: When Bad Things Happen To Drunk Women
Physical Consequences
Relational Consequences
Legal Consequences
Work Consequences
Academic Consequences
Part Two: Breaking The Cycle Of Addiction
Quiz: The Audit Test
Lifetime Drinking Test
Chapter 9: Choosing Life over Liquor
Resilience
The Most Common Excuses for Not Quitting
Chapter 10: Recovery Strategies
Tell Someone
Make New Friends
Trigger Points
Be Honest
Believe Your Life Can Be Different
Get Off the Elevator
Calling It Quits
What to Expect
Coping Skills for Women Who Drink Too Much
Chapter 11: Staying Sober: Alcoholics Anonymous and Other Programs
Why Some Women Are Wary of AA
AA as a Religious Organization
FAQs about AA
Finding a Sponsor
Working with a Sponsor
Tips for Staying Sober
Helping Others
Gratitude
Chapter 12: Family Matters
Sins of the Mother
Games Husbands Play
Family Intervention
She’s Getting Treatment; Now What?
Postrecovery Breakups
Jealousy
Al-Anon Members Speak Out
Afterword
Getting Help: Resources for Recovery
General Resources for Alcoholics and Their Families
Support Groups
Other Links
Treatment Centers
Other Support Groups
Alcoholism Literature
Bibliography
Index
“Packed with essential, honest, practical information for the alcoholic and her family, Women and Recovery draws on Dr. Harris’ professional expertise, wise advice, and personal story to show the reader how to find a fulfilling new life.”
—Paula D’Arcy, author of Waking up to This Day
“For years, there has been an alarming lack of resources specifically for women with alcohol problems. This book fills that void by intelligently combining forthright personal accounts of alcoholism with treatment and recovery science. The result is a compelling, engaging, and, above all, useful book that will open the door to a better life for countless women.”
—John F. Kelly, Ph.D., Associate Professor in Psychiatry, Harvard Medical School; Director Addiction Recovery Management Service, Massachusetts General Hospital
“Where was this book when my mother needed it? Women and Recovery: Finding Hope is a wonderful and very comforting resource for women and family members. I really enjoyed it.”
—Susan Ford Bales, daughter of Betty Ford
“ Women and Recovery is a must read. Dr. Harris gets it—one size fits all has never fit women. Her page-turning vignettes about binge-drinking girls, social-drinking moms, and others illustrate the many ways women slip into alcoholism. With her unique coping skills, Dr. Harris offers a lifesaving ring of hope to women and their loved ones.”
—Karen Tandy, former Administrator, U.S. Drug Enforcement Administration
“Kitty Harris knows that women who drink too much will resist the strategies that lead to breaking the cycle of addiction unless they trust the messenger. By telling her own story of recovery using straight, blunt, and sober talk, Kitty supports women in recovery who choose to live their second chance in a qualitatively different life. It is this combination of hope and a solution specifically directed at women that gives Women in Recovery a vital and prominent position in the recovery literature.”
—Dorie Evensen, Ph.D., Professor of Education, Penn State University

Copyright © 2012 by Kitty S. Harris and Jodie Gould. All rights reserved
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Published by John Wiley & Sons, Inc., Hoboken, New Jersey Published simultaneously in Canada
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Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Harris, Kitty S. Women and recovery: finding hope/Kitty S. Harris with Jodie Gould. p. cm. Includes bibliographical references and index. ISBN 978-0-470-94183-6 (pbk.); ISBN 978-1-118-21733-7 (ebk); ISBN 978-1-118-21734-4 (ebk); ISBN 978-1-118-21735-1 (ebk) 1. Women alcoholics—Rehabilitation. I. Gould, Jodie. II. Title. HV5137.H37 2012 616.86′10082—dc23 2011046740
This book is dedicated to all the courageous women who walked before me on the road we call recovery—most especially: Betty, Irene, and Pitsy.
To Sylva, D’Ann and Shyrle, and to all of the loving women who walked beside me.
Finally, to Mandy, Leigh, and Peyton and to all of the resilient women who will walk down this road after me.
To all of these brave women, I paraphrase the words of St. Francis of Assisi: “Start by doing what’s necessary, then do what’s possible. Suddenly you will find that you are doing the impossible.”
—Kitty Harris
To my beloved daughter, Samantha, who at age ten, is developing the kind of self-confidence and independent thinking that will help her make good decisions during what will surely be some challenging years ahead.
To my husband, Robert Katel, for his unflagging support; my mother, for her maternal wisdom; my sister, whose advice I depend on; and to my brother-in-law Rick Tieszen, for his brilliance and positive spirit.
—Jodie Gould
Acknowledgments
It is a well-known truth in my field that no one really succeeds on his or her own—we all have the blessings of others who help us along the way. This book is an example of that principle. I would like to thank Jodie Gould, who made the initial contact that started this project. She has been a joy to work with and gave voice not only to the pain of addiction but also to the hope of recovery. My agent, Linda Konner, took a total novice and walked me through the publishing maze with patience and understanding. I would like to express appreciation to our editors, Tom Miller and Jorge Amaral, whose guidance and support directed us to a well-defined finished product. In addition to our editors, thanks go to Christel Winkler, Kimberly Monroe-Hill, and the other individuals throughout John Wiley & Sons for their support. I am grateful to my assistant, Ann Casiraghi, who was always willing to help with research and references that needed to be verified, and to Dr. Beth Robinson who, as a graduate student, engaged in hours of brainstorming for the genesis of the recovery model. I have tremendous gratitude for all of the women who agreed to be interviewed for this book. Their honesty and courage inspire me. Additionally, I acknowledge that this book is a reflection of thirty-two years of participating in recovery meetings, reading hundreds of books and journals on addiction and recovery, and attending seminars, conferences, and workshops that address the issues of addictive disorders. Thank you to all who have shaped my ideas, concepts, and vision of the pain of addiction and the hope of recovery.
My friends through the years have had such a significant effect on my life. These friendships have always been one of the most treasured aspects in my life. Bless you for all of the time, energy, and love that you have invested in me—I would not be the person who I am today without your handprint on my heart.
Finally, I would like to express my appreciation and love for my family, the people in my life who have mattered the most. Mom and Dad never waver in their love and support. My sister, Linn, stands by my side through the ups and downs and has always been there for me, as has my brother-in-law, David. My deep gratitude and love to my precious husband, Morris, who is a reflection of serenity and models for me the genuine meaning of living an authentic life. I am blessed!
—Kitty Harris
Thanks to Kitty Harris for being such a delightful coauthor. Every book I write, I learn something new, and Kitty showed me how pain knocks on e