From Troy to Man

Adam Pearson

Description

Troy Brown resumes his diary. Now he is seventeen and he desperately wants to leave home and start his life as a bachelor. He has just been dumped by his first proper girlfriend and not because he has 'accidentally' cheated on her twice during their relationship. She wants to play the field. Most of his friends have moved away from the island and life out of school proves to be quite a challenge for him.Troy is forced to grow up because of his incredible ability to make mistakes. His mistakes as usual are of a sexual nature and the consequences of unprotected sex begin to appear, seemingly out of thin air.Faced with fatherhood and separation from his children, Troy's attitude to life changes forever. His main concern isn't football anymore - it is how the hell he is going to be able to be a real father to his children and how many children has he got?Of course his life is full of the other problems associated with day-to-day life. Will he ever find true love? Will he ever find a job that he is truly happy in? Can he solve a murder mystery? Can he avoid being murdered himself? Will he ever be able to be a true father to his children? All of these questions are answered in this book.If you thought that being a fifteen-year old virgin was enough of a rollercoaster ride for Troy - read on. This year and a half of his life may leave you needing to ingest a large dose of motion pills.

Sujets

• Philosophie et théologie
• Memoir

Informations

• Publié par: Andrews UK
• Date de parution: 09 septembre 2013
• Nombre de lectures: 0
• EAN13: 9781909143821
• Langue: English

Extrait

Title Page
FROM TROY TO MAN
The Diary of an Accidental Father
Written by Adam Pearson



Publisher Information
First published as an ebook in 2013 by
Apex Publishing Ltd
PO Box 7086, Clacton on Sea, Essex, CO15 5WN, England
www.apexpublishing.co .uk
Digital edition converted and published
by Andrews UK Limited 2012
www.andrewsuk.com
Copyright © 2012 Adam Pearson
The author has asserted his moral rights
All rights reserved. This book is sold subject to the condition, that no part of this book is to be reproduced, in any shape or form. Or by way of trade, stored in a retrieval system or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, be lent, re-sold, hired out or otherwise circulated in any form of binding or cover other than that in which it is published and without a similar condition, including this condition being imposed on the subsequent purchaser, without prior permission of the copyright holder.



Dedication
For Debbie, Alicia and Isabella whose love and support overwhelms me.
I am so blessed to have them in my life.
And in memory of my father Richard David Pearson who squandered his own talents
And my doting grandparents Richard Ernest Frederick Pearson
And Margaret Louise Pearson who would both have been so proud.



Introduction
Last year was a bit like negotiating a moto-cross course for me. First of all I fell in love/lust with (what I thought then) was the perfect girl, Lara Matthews. It was an unrequited love, though. She was going out with one of my best friends, Spud. Spud, though was sowing his wild oats and I felt in was my duty to try to steer Lara down the right path in life and after she found out about Spud’s shenanigans, she dumped him. Unfortunately Lara felt that her road to love then led to my friend Tom’s door.
Spud was then involved in a bizarre family secret in which he was initially suspected of being my mother’s secret lover. Then he was suspected of being the secret son of the local tramp. In the end he turned out to be my brother, who had been given up for adoption ten months before I was born.
My own attempts at finding a girlfriend always ended negatively. First of all I tried the Internet, only to end up nearly getting abducted by Trevor Marsh. He was a man that was sensationally cleared of murder a few months later. Then there was Ellie who tried to use me as a scapegoat father to her secret pregnancy. Finally I did find love, in the shape of someone I had taken a dislike to because she was a Pompey fan, Donna Bull (AKA Snowy).
Just as I was about to lose my virginity, (the day before in fact) I was involved in a serious car crash on the way back from a football match. I ended up losing my virginity to a sexy little Asian nurse during my recuperation. I felt guilty but I got away with it. Snowy discovered my diary; I showed her my non-incriminating 2003 diary so I had to give up writing for my own security reasons - until now.
There was the occasional high. My beloved football team, Southampton got to the FA Cup Final (The world’s oldest knockout Cup competition). They lost to Arsenal on the day but I had a memorable day in Cardiff, where I discovered my mother’s old diary. The book shrouded the next few months of my life in confusion, though and I even ended up running away to Cardiff and being taken under the wing of a huge Ghanaian man called Kwame, before eventually being found by my Dad and my former tormenter and (as I found out much later) Snowy’s Dad Pitbull.
I did end up having a fling with my old heart throb, Lara but it was at a bad time for me because I was in love with Snowy then and I had grown out of my infatuation with her. Why couldn’t she have shown an interest in me when I was in love with her? If she had - I would have enjoyed 2003 a great deal more than I did.



Chapter One
The Unwilling Singleton
25 December 2004, Saturday
This should have been the best Christmas of my life. Everything went very well.
My brother Stuart (AKA Spud) brought me a laptop that now enables me to write my diary with total security and the rest of the family clubbed together to buy me a car. (Ford Street KA) The car is a complete dream.
I found it difficult showing complete enthusiasm for these superb gifts because my beloved girlfriend Snowy finished with me last night. She told me that she wanted to have a year of trying out other relationships to make sure that I am the one that she wanted to spend the rest of her life with.
She told me to play the field to see if I still love her in a year’s time. She didn’t give me a choice in the matter, therefore I am utterly miserable.
The promise of a white Christmas was only fulfilled up North. For us in the south, it was the usual bitterly cold Christmas Day.
At least this year I was able to experience Christmas. Last year I was in a hospital bed attached to a life support machine.
We spent the day at home. My baby sister Angelina, who is just over a year old, was the focus of the attention and was helped to open her presents by an enthusiastic Mum and Dad. She seemed to be more interested in the packaging though and cried when Mum insisted on throwing it out with the rest of the rubbish.
I was given my car keys in a pretty little package and took my baby out for a short spin before lunch.
Our guests were Nan and Grandad Brown (who’s birthday it is today but he doesn’t bother celebrating it anymore) and my mother’s sister, Auntie Cathy with her new boyfriend Dean. Dean is quite short with spiky black hair. He is only a couple of years older than I. He’s all right except for the fact that he is an Arsenal fan and when he talks he begins every sentence with the F word. I find that quite irritating. It must be contagious because Cathy has started to swear more now.
Lunch was as delicious, as ever, and very very filling. When dinner followed four hours later I was still full up from lunch and could hardly eat a thing.
Nan and Grandad are either at war with each other or in love. It seems to change from day to day. Today was a lovey-dovey day thank God! They left at six, shortly followed by Cathy and Dean. Then Dad, Mum, Angelina, Griz (the dog) and me were able to spend a peaceful evening watching BBC One.
26 December 2004, Sunday
I had a nice lie in this morning. After breakfast I tried to phone Snowy but her phone was switched off.
It was bitterly cold again today as Dad and I discovered as we made our way over the Solent to Southampton for the Saints Premiership match against Charlton Athletic.
We bumped into Saints’ new assistant manager as we strolled around the ground in the December sunshine. Dad approached him. ‘Hello Harry!’ He said, ‘Can I trouble you for a picture?’
‘Not at all!’ Said Jim Smith as he happily posed with Dad while Dad took the snap with his mobile phone.
Jim Smith patted Dad on his back as he went on his way. Dad showed me the picture and I said, ‘He didn’t mind you calling him Harry then?’
Dad was mortified. ‘Why the hell did I call him Harry? He must have thought I was a right idiot!’
It was a twelve thirty kick off and the Dell Supporters Club opened at eleven thirty but they were only serving soft drinks until twelve o’clock. The sober members meant a sober atmosphere and the club host, Ben Shoveller, was finding it difficult creating a buzz.
This atmosphere unfortunately spread into the stadium. It was the quietest home game I remember going to and the result was just as under whelming. Nil-nil. This result leaves us second from bottom in the league and still heading for relegation to the Coca Cola Championship.
We caught the three o’clock Red Jet back to Cowes and went straight home for a dinner of leftover turkey, boiled ham and mashed potato.
I tried to phone Snowy again this evening but she still had her phone switched off. Maybe she is deliberately trying to avoid me? I was hoping that she might still be going on the double date that we arranged with Meat and Kylie tomorrow.
I went around to my best friend, Ed’s house this evening to play on all his new X-Box games. His beautiful fifteen-year-old sister Zoe joined in.
The News was awful today. A huge earthquake has occurred of the coast of India. It created a massive tsunami that has reaped devastation along the coastlines of Sri Lanka, India, Bangladesh, Burma, Thailand, Malaysia, Indonesia and Kenya. It is only a matter of time before horrific death tolls are reported.
27 December 2004, Monday
This morning I went to the cinema with my friends Meat (AKA Nathan Edge) and his long-term girlfriend, Kylie. It was arranged a couple of weeks ago and Snowy was supposed to be with me. I was reluctant to keep the date but Meat and Kylie insisted. We watched Lemony Snicket’s A Series of Unfortunate Events. I entered the theatre slightly worried that it might be a film parodying my own life but it was about three of the weirdest American kids you have ever seen and considering their competition that is some achievement.
After we picked up lunch at the drive-thru KFC we went to Shanklin Theatre to watch their production of the Dick Whittington pantomime. I only agreed to go because I had nothing else to do but it was a surprisingly good show until, just before the end, Idle Jack and Vermintrude made an announcement.
IDLE JACK: We normally do birthday wishes at this stage but we have no birthdays today.
AUDIENCE: AWWWW
VERMINTRUDE: But we do have a very special question to ask someone in the audience.
IDLE JACK: That’s right. Do we have a Kylie Williams in the auditorium?
(Kylie shyly raised her arm Idle Jack and Vermintrude waved from the stage)
VERMINTRUD