How Marketing Beats Dick

Nova Embers

Description

There's a lot of dick in this one.


Maggie Hargidan hasn't had sex in over two years. And that's a problem on so many levels. Especially when she has to market erotic tour packages to senior citizens for the fall season. That is until Richard becomes her new supervisor.


Richard Ryder is the newest London transfer to the marketing team. He is sexy and British and seems to have a particular interest on one of his new subordiantes.


But when Maggie makes a huge HR mistake that may result in losing her job and Richard's affections, she may have to ride a whole lot of dick to turn her whole life around.


What's a girl to do?

Sujets

• Romance
• Romance érotique
• BD Erotique
• Sexy
• Fiction
• Erotica

Informations

• Publié par: 4 Horsemen Publications, Inc.
• Date de parution: 09 janvier 2022
• Nombre de lectures: 2
• EAN13: 9781644503096
• Langue: English
• Poids de l'ouvrage: 1 Mo

Extrait

Table o f Contents
Internal Memorandum
Are you there, Dick? It’s m e, Maggie.
The Girl with the D ick Tattoo
A Thousand Sple ndid Dicks
The Fault in Our Dicks
I Know Why the Caged Dick Sings





How Marketing Be ats Dick
Copyright © 2021 Nova Embers. All rights r eserved.

4 Horsemen Publication s, Inc.
1497 Main St. S uite 169
Dunedin, FL 34698
4horsemenpublicat ions.com
info@4horsemenpublicat ions.com
All rights to the work within are reserved to the author and publisher. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, scanning, or otherwise, except as permitted under Section 107 or 108 of the 1976 International Copyright Act, without prior written permission except in brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews. Please contact either the Publisher or Author to gain per mission.
This is book is meant as a reference guide. All characters, organizations, and events portrayed in this novel are either products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. All brands, quotes, and cited work respectfully belongs to the original rights holders and bear no affiliation to the authors or pu blisher.
Print ISBN: 978-1-644 50-310-2
Audio ISBN: 978-1-644 50-308-9
Ebook ISBN: 978-1-644 50-309-6


Dedication
To Hen ry Cavill,
my inspiration for this one.
Internal Memorandum
To: All Staff
From: Dalia Lance, Vice President of Humans and Heart
Date: Jun e 15, 2021
Re: The Treatment and Care of Office Furniture and Equipment

It’s been brought to our attention that there has been a misuse of office furniture.
The management would like to remind all employees that residue, whether it be chemical, natural, or food related is strictly prohibited. This goes against Company policies outlined in the Employee Handbook that every team member was required to read and sign at the beginning of the fiscal year and/or within the first ninety days of the new hire probati on period.
All Company property—including desks, storage areas, work areas, lockers, file cabinets, computer systems, office telephones, facsimile machines, copy machines, and vehicles—must be used properly and maintained in good work ing order.
Employees who misuse Company property may be personally liable for replacing or repairing the item in question.
Please report any suspicious activity directly to the Human Resources d epartment.


1
Are you there, Dick? It’s m e, Maggie.
M aggie Hardigan hated Monday mornings almost as much as the not-so-gentle reminders life sent her way (without permission she may add) on just how long it’d been since she last got dick.
The daily, endless scrolling on every social media platform she had ever joined didn’t help the situation, especially those lovely birth announcements: We’re having another baby! #partyoffou r #blessed
#shootmeinthefacenow was more like it. Not that I’m dying to have a baby anytime soon , but… jeez, I wonder how those are made?
Or the weekly dick pics her best friend back home liked to send her courtesy of one of his latest conquests. Or— OR— when she walked in on the CEO of EOA banging the sign spinner behind the local pizza joint during her lunch break. Yeah. That was a real eye-opening situation. I mean…come on! The sign spinner? Really? As if the CEO of a Fortune 500 company couldn’t find someone bette r? I mean—
No. That was mean of me. I digress. I’m sure he is a nice fucking person. He even has a nice high kick when he gets excited about Free Breadstick Tuesdays. I mean, who wouldn’t get excited about free breadsticks on a Tuesday? This girl r ight here!
But yeah. Everyone else was getting dick besides her. Life could be pretty cruel that way, shrinking whatever bit of confidence she was able to muster first thing on a Monda y morning.
It’d been two years and counting, just in case anyone had been wondering. Horrible, right? Yeah. I thought so. Especially when I got that lovely Timehop reminder the night before on my purp le iPhone:
Two years a go today, you were with Peter in Cancun.
Yep. That was the last time I got laid. The last time I allowed any man to touch me. Oh, Peter, you really did a mind-f uck on me.
It wasn’t difficult to find a willing man to have sex with, but she couldn’t seem to erase the memory of the look of disappointment on Peter’s face when he finally looked at her naked for the first time. He made her feel as though it was her fault her body was the wrong proportion. As if she could will her breasts to be a different cup size. Though she would never shame a woman for wanting to up their bra size by surgical means, it just wasn’t…for her . Why did she need to change herself just to please another man’ s desires?
But now, because of him , she always found an excuse not to swipe right on a d ating app.
Man…I really need to find someone to brush away these cobwebs before they make permanent residence and become a hazard. Her medical grade, stainless steel, curved dildo worked wonders. It was worth every penny she’d spent on it at her local adult entertainment store, finding her G-spot every single time. But alas, there was no substitution for the feeling of a real dick thrusting deeply inside her while a male voice whispered dirty, filthy things into the curve of her ear as he chastised, You’re a very dirty gir l, Maggie.
It was why, whenever she would wake up in the middle of the night, after a very vivid sex dream, she prayed to every god in the universe, to offer her some shred of mercy and bring someone into her life that would fuck her brains out. She just wanted a good time, and if a partner was worth keeping around, she didn’t mind gaining a boyfriend for the pri ce of two.
She sighed as she swiped her employee key card over the card reader while balancing her Starbucks and purse in the other hand. A quick flash of red followed by a beep, then she was quickly inside, her lanyard swinging around her neck.
Slowly, she walked toward her cubicle, thoughts of dicks, small breasts, and fucking sign spinners floating around in her mind. Sexual frustration on a Monday morning was the real tragedy. Especially when you’re on a team tasked with finding new ways to sell sexual fantasies to adults of all ages an d flavors.
Vanessa and Dante were leaning forward, their faces inches apart as they shared a private conversation, giggling and what not.
“What are you two whispering about?” Maggie asked as she slung her chunky, oatmeal-colored sweater over the back of her compu ter chair.
“HR sent out another memo,” Dante said, rolling his eyes. “It seems someone’s been leaving behind mysterious white stains on the office furnitu re again.”
Maggie barked out a laugh as she reviewed the company-wide email. That would make it four times within the last two months. I wonder who it could be? Someone in Accounting? Perhaps IT. Or maybe someo ne in Sal—