World Wrestling Insanity

James Guttman

Description

In an industry where nothing is real and no one actually wins or loses, the possibilities for manipulation are endless. World Wrestling Insanity sets out to expose the nepotism, backward logic and power plays that have made World Wrestling Entertainment go round. Alongside many well-known wrestling personalities, author James Guttman uses sarcasm, humour and hard facts to break down the secrets of Vince McMahon's company and analyses the reasoning behind many of its creative and business decisions.

Sujets

• Lucha libre profesional
• Wrestling

Informations

• Publié par: Ecw Press
• Date de parution: 16 novembre 2010
• Nombre de lectures: 0
• EAN13: 9781554902699
• Langue: English
• Poids de l'ouvrage: 2 Mo

Extrait

WORLD WRESTLING INSANITY
WORLD WRESTLING INSANITY
The Decline and Fall of a Family Empire
JAMES GUTTMAN

Copyright © James Guttman, 2006
Published by ECW PRESS
2120 Queen Street East, Suite 200, Toronto, Ontario, Canada M4E 1E2
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form by any process — electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise — without the prior written permission of the copyright owners and ECW PRESS.
Library and Archives Canada Cataloguing in Publication
Guttman, James, 1977–
World Wrestling insanity : the decline and fall of a family empire / James Guttman.
ISBN 1-55022-728-9
1. McMahon, Vince. 2. World Wrestling Entertainment, Inc. 3. McMahon family. 4. Wrestling—United States. 5 . Wrestling promoters—United States— Biography. I. Title.
GV 1196.M 35 G 88 2006       796.812’0973       C 2006-900490-0
Editor: Michael Holmes
Typesetting: Gail Nina
Cover and text design: Tania Craan
Cover photo: James Guttman
PRINTING : Marquis
DISTRIBUTION
CANADA : Jaguar Book Group, 100 Armstrong Avenue, Georgetown, ON, L7G 5S4
UNITED STATES: Independent Publishers Group, 814 North Franklin Street, Chicago, Illinois 60610
PRINTED AND BOUND IN CANADA

This book is dedicated to the memory of Chris Martens
CONTENTS
Acknowledgements
Introduction
Looking for Fault in All the Wrong Places
All Hail the Quad King
McMahonifest Destiny
Galoogore Comes to Greenwich
To the Hunter Goes the Spoils
Reality Bites
How to Beat Up the New Guy
Trust No One
The Legend of Johnny Laryngitis
Perverts, Racism and Other Funny Concepts
Smart Marks Work the Kayfabed Babyfaced Heel Heat
What I’m Trying to Say Is
Insanity Extras
Insanity Contributors
Acknowledgements
I want to thank the following people for all they did to help me make this book become a reality: My wife Jaimee, Michael Holmes and everyone at ECW PRESS, Derek Burgan, Mallory Mahling, Matt “Dawgs” Aponte, Tom Prichard, the entire staff at WorldWrestling- Insanity.com for all the amazing work they’ve done, Stu Saks, Dave Scherer, the Pro Wrestling Torch, Samer El-Khawam, Monterey Monger, all the people who I can’t thank by name but know I wish I could, my brother and parents, Terry Funk, Elix Skipper, Aaron Aguilera, Jim “Kamala” Harris, Missy Hyatt, D-Lo Brown, the Honky Tonk Man, Lanny Poffo, Amy Weber, Charlie Haas and all the readers of my work through the years. Thank you for making all this possible.
Introduction
Alright, hold up. Before we begin, there are a few things that need to be made clear. First and foremost, this is not a book that sets out to unfairly slam World Wrestling Entertainment and the McMahon Family. My goal here isn’t to say that everything they’ve done in their entire lives has been wrong. Vince McMahon, along with many others, helped to create a unique piece of American pop culture and for that, they deserve our respect.
They’ve done plenty of things right on their ride to the top. For every employee who cried unfair treatment after leaving, there’s two to say things were jellybeans and rainbows during their WWE tenure. Some of those former employees are quoted in this book. The company has been a staple of American society for so long that it had to be doing something right. I don’t ignore that fact. I present it. Then again, I examine the other side too. Lately, there’s been a bit too much of “the other side.” You’ll read all about it soon.
Here’s the issue. Wrestling is an often overlooked segment of our society. People don’t watch it. They also make sure people know they don’t watch it. I realized that when I told people about this book. I’m not talking about family or friends, but acquaintances, friends of friends, distant relatives and barbers. I’m talking about people who have no idea what I write about. They don’t know Triple H from Triple A. They don’t know Vince McMahon from Ed McMahon. They don’t know Johnny Ace from Jonny Quest. This is fun, but I digress. Where was I? Oh yeah, telling people about the book.
Someone would bring it up and they’d ask me what I was doing with myself. With a big smile, I’d say, “I’m working on a book.” Inevitably, they’d respond, “Oh, what’s it about?” That’s when the fun began.
I tried many different ways to say it. I tried, “It’s about World Wrestling Entertainment.” That was usually met with a cold stare because most people still think it’s the World Wrestling Federation. Then I’d have to go into the whole story about how they had issues with the World Wildlife Fund and explain the lawsuit. It became a hassle. Plus, they didn’t give a damn in the end anyway. Another five minutes of my life wasted.
After trying to find imaginative ways to explain what this book was about without coming off like Captain Wrestling Fan Weiner of Planet Doofus, I figured to hell with it. I just said it like it is. They asked what it was about, I said “professional wrestling.”
The response I was met with most? “Oh, I don’t watch wrestling.”
Now, keep in mind I didn’t say I was writing a flyer to pass around for free at the supermarket. This is a real book. People buy it. It’s in stores. It’s a pretty cool thing. None of that mattered though — it’s about wrestling.
Seriously, I could tell these people that I’m a writer, but I write a free newsletter on Post-it notes and stick them on my bathroom mirror. If the subject matter of the Post-it notes was football or stock picks, they’d be impressed. The fact that it’s wrestling negates anything good about it in some people’s eyes. Folks who can only name about five wrestlers off the top of their heads. They know Jimmy Snuka, The Rock, Hulk Hogan, Steve Austin and Rocky Balboa. Then they realize that Rocky Balboa wasn’t a wrestler, but a movie boxer and the number drops to four.
That’s the sad fact. However, wrestling is a huge empire with money flowing in that most corporations would kill for. It’s a part of our society. It’s something anyone who’s grown up in any decade since the ’50s can relate to. How could something with so much perseverance be scorned by so many?
It’s this scorn that has allowed professional wrestling to exist in a bubble for years. No one notices what happens on WWE programming. It’s almost as if I’m the only person on the planet who gets Monday Night Raw and Smackdown with my cable package. Many nights I’ve witnessed insane and unbelievable television moments that would knock the world on its ass if ER had done it. Sadly, it’s WWE and no one seems to care.
This is a scary thought. Do you realize that currently there’s one major wrestling promotion in the United States and it’s owned by a man that no longer has to worry about competition? Vincent Kennedy McMahon, along with his family and colleagues, is sitting pretty. It’s the scariest predicament that most professional wrestlers could have ever imagined. A strong-willed promoter with unchecked power running amok and going haywire at the drop of a hat. What could be worse? There’s no way out. It’s like an episode of The Twilight Zone. I expect Rod Serling to show up at any moment and take us all away from this. Then again, if he did, Vince would take ol’ Rod and make him join the “Mr. McMahon Kiss My Ass Club” on live TV.
You don’t know what the Kiss My Ass Club is? Oh, you’re in for some fun. You’re gonna get a lot out of this book. Basically, Mr. McMahon went through a phase where he enjoyed making employees kiss his exposed ass on television. Yeah. Let that soak in. Imagine these situations in your own life.
Picture working for an owner who no longer has to worry about losing you in a bidding war to another company. Imagine how grateful you’d have to be to that boss in order to not lose your job. Sure, he was loving you six years ago when you threatened to jump to a rival company. Now that company is dead. In fact, there’s pretty much no other rival at all. Either stay at this insane office and allow the boss’s son-in-law to unplug your computer every time you’re just about to finish your report or else you have to go to Japan to find work. Sucks, huh? Welcome to World Wrestling Insanity — where up is down. Down is up. And you’re thankful just for a chance to be on the show.
Maybe you do know what the Kiss My Ass Club is. Great. You’re gonna get a lot out of this book too. There’s plenty here for everyone. I have inside stories and thoughts on wrestling philosophy from some of the industry’s most well-known names. There’s analysis and then analysis of that analysis. Then we analyze that analysis until we all have headaches. Don’t worry, there’s plenty of sarcasm, wise-ass skits and parody. Not to mention those delightful doctored photos that have made me a favorite in the McMahon household for years.
Also, let it be known that this book doesn’t reflect the views and opinions of any other writers, my friends, my family or anyone else. I doubt that anyone else blames Triple H for as much as I do anyway. What I’m saying is that I wrote this alone and didn’t run it by anyone except the good folks over at ECW PRESS . Everything I say here is something I myself believe. That’s it. If I didn’t believe it I wouldn’t write it. Watch I’ll show you:
There really is a Santa Clau …
See, couldn’t finish writing it. Why? I don’t believe it. See how that works? Good.
As I said earlier though, this isn’t an anti-McMahon book. This stuff is all straight shooting. I don’t play devil’s advocate. I never provoke debate just so I can argue. I have no agendas and don’t set out to piss off Vince, Stephanie, Shane, Johnny Ace, Triple H or anyone else just for the sake of pissing them off. If I anger