True You

Tess Brigham MFT BCC

Description

From CNBC Make It’s “Millennial Therapist,” author and speaker, a thought-provoking new book offering a glimpse into what 20-somethings can conquer their fears.
Brigham’s work as a psychotherapist and certified coach started after her own life transformation took place. At age 27, Tess seemed to have it all as a top Hollywood junior talent manager. But on the inside things felt empty and pointless. She took a huge risk, quit her job, and rebuilt a career and life she loved. Now she helps other young adults and early-career professionals navigate the same quarter-life process with her practical experience and insights on finding happiness and clarity. She provides tools and techniques that can powerfully shift an individual’s mindset and behaviors for overall well being.
True You: A Step-by-Step Guide to Conquering Your Quarter Life Crisis is a vital resource for those who are feeling stuck, uninspired, or uncertain by where they are in life.

Sujets

• Self-Help
• Mental Health
• Self-help (disambiguation)
• Self-help

Informations

• Publié par: Balboa Press
• Date de parution: 11 décembre 2022
• Nombre de lectures: 0
• EAN13: 9798765236215
• Langue: English

Extrait

TRUE YOU
 
 
A STEP-BY-STEP GUIDE TO CONQUERING YOUR QUARTER-LIFE CRISIS
 
 
 
 
 
 
TESS BRIGHAM, MFT, BCC
 
 
 
 
 

 
Copyright © 2022 Tess Brigham, MFT, BCC.
 
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the author except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.
 
 
Balboa Press
A Division of Hay House
1663 Liberty Drive
Bloomington, IN 47403
www.balboapress.com
844-682-1282
 
All names and identifying details of my former and current clients described in this book have been changed.
 
Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.
 
The author of this book does not dispense medical advice or prescribe the use of any technique as a form of treatment for physical, emotional, or medical problems without the advice of a physician, either directly or indirectly. The intent of the author is only to offer information of a general nature to help you in your quest for emotional and spiritual well-being. In the event you use any of the information in this book for yourself, which is your constitutional right, the author and the publisher assume no responsibility for your actions.
 
 
ISBN: 979-8-7652-3623-9 (sc)
ISBN: 979-8-7652-3622-2 (hc)
ISBN: 979-8-7652-3621-5 (e)
 
Library of Congress Control Number: 2022920810
 
Balboa Press rev. date: 11/30/2022
DEDICATION
This book is dedicated to all of the clients I’ve worked with over the years. Thank you for trusting me with the most vulnerable parts of your life. Every single person I’ve worked with has impacted me in some way and I appreciate you sharing your life wit h me.
In Loving Me mory:
Heather Combs & Lisa Sheridan
Thank you both for being a part of my 20s. I couldn’t have made it without you.
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
I’m eternally grateful for all of the support and guidance I’ve received since starting this book.
Professionally I would like to t hank:
Tara Rae Bradford for being my coach/editor/marketing genius/PR maven for the past three years! Truly this book wouldn’t exist without you.
Meg Bloom for taking my 70,000 words and creating something I’m really proud of.
Joannie Burstein and Mary Tonry, for not only being amazing bosses, but for patiently nurturing and guiding me through my 20s.
Abby Medcalf for always being there for me as a colleague, mentor and most importantly, friend.
Daina Coffey for always treating my business like it was your own.
Personally I would like to t hank:
To my parents, Tom Brigham and Ann Einstein, I wouldn’t have been able to write this book without your love and encouragement. You gave me the strength, support and work ethic to believe in myself and to go after my dreams.
To my sister Brooke for being my big sister and helping me navigate through life. Even when you’re “bossy” I know you only want the best for me.
To my niece Layla for being hands-down the best niece in the entire world. You’ll be twenty soon so I hope this book can provide you the guidance you need.
To my two boys:
To my husband Steve for always supporting my dreams, having my back, and taking care of me this past year. You’re the reason I’ve been able to build my business and write this book and there are no words for how grateful I am.
To my son Max, being a parent has changed me and has challenged me to look at myself, even when I didn’t want to, and be better. You’re the reason I push myself to keep striving for my dreams. My hope is you go out into this world and create a life you want to live. Oh, and I love you more.
TABLE OF CONTENTS
INTRODUCTION
CHAPTER 1 :    HOW I BECAME “THE MILLENNIAL THERAPIST”
CHAPTER 2 :    OUTSIDE NOISE
CHAPTER 3 :    WHAT’S HAPPINESS GOT TO DO WITH IT
CHAPTER 4 :    THERE’S SOMETHING ABOUT “SCARY”
CHAPTER 5 :    HOW OTHER PEOPLE’S STUFF CAN KILL YOUR VIBE
CHAPTER 6 :    YOU’VE GOT VALUES
CHAPTER 7 :    THE ONE WHERE YOU CHANGE YOUR LIFE
CHAPTER 8 :    MESSY TESSY IN THE MIDDLE
CHAPTER 9 :    DECISIONS, DECISIONS, DECISIONS
CONCLUSION
INTRODUCTION
Seven o’clock, Playa Del Rey, Los Angeles, California. It is the year 1999, and I am standing in front of my bathroom mirror desperately trying to curl my hair. I was on my way to Jennifer Aniston’s thirtieth birthday party thrown by none other than her then-boyfriend Brad Pitt. Only 1200 people were invited to this “exclusive” event—it was a really big deal.
Technically, the invite was for my talent-manager boss, Joannie, and I was her plus-one. The plan was for me to drive over to Joannie’s house on the westside, and from there the two of us would take the long trek to the Sunset Strip.
It was a warm L.A. night in February. As Joannie and I entered the nightclub, we were surprised to see only a handful of the 1200 invitees.
Jen and Brad were snuggled up at a private banquet with their inner circles. Joannie and I sat at the bar and watched the place fill up. We were all doing the same thing: we’d casually glance at Jen and Brad before scanning the room for someone more famous, more powerful, and more important than we felt. You’d spot someone, get their attention, then make small talk until one of you spotted someone better. Since I was an average-looking twenty-six-year-old working at a mid-tier talent agency, conversations didn’t last long.
But that was okay. I knew most of these big exclusive Hollywood gatherings aren’t much fun at the moment, but they’re fun to talk about after the fact—which IS exactly what I’m doing, twenty-three years later. Though I didn’t realize it at the time, that party would come to symbolize a high moment in a life I always thought I wanted.
My entire life I had one goal: to work in the Entertainment Industry. I would be surrounded by creative people making movies and TV. I’d have a powerful and important job, attend premieres, go to the Oscars, and at the end of a long day I’d drive one of my luxury vehicles to my mansion in the hills, obviously. At any cost—this singular goal kept me laser-focused on whatever I needed to do next to become “Tess Who Worked In Hollywood.”
When I figured out (pretty early, actually) that I didn’t actually enjoy the day to day of filmmaking, I didn’t let that stop me. I pivoted. And when my new direction wasn’t that much fun either? I pivoted again. And again.
At the time I thought I was “being persistent” and “dedicated”. I was “following my dream” and nothing was going to get in my way—not even my own feelings! (If any of this sounds familiar to you, you’re reading the right book.) Eventually, though, I burned out. I quit my Hollywood job. I moved back home. I did all the stuff you’re supposed to do when you’re starting over, but the biggest thing I did was something I could have done anywhere, at any time: face my feelings about where I was heading in my life.
Cut to many years later. I’m a licensed psychotherapist and certified coach. It took some doing to get here, but once I got in touch with my feelings, I realized that I was passionate about helping people build confidence and find the right path for them—so I became a therapist. Today I specialize in working with young people navigating the challenges of early adulthood (i.e., your 20s—eek!).
There’s a lot of pressure to make this decade “count”.
At the time I set up my practice in downtown San Francisco, “20-somethings” meant “millennials”. I had heard about these “millennials” in the media and how they were entitled, spoiled and lazy but that didn’t match up with the young people who sat on my couch across from me. These young people were incredibly hard-working individuals.
They had graduated from good schools and landed what they believed were “ideal jobs”, but they saw thirty looming and felt like they had made some terrible mistake. They were successful on paper, but they were afraid they were on the “wrong” path, and they were desperate to “fix” the problem before they turned 30.
Not sure how they all got this idea that they needed to have their lives together by age 30 but the closer my clients were to that dreaded number, the more desperate they felt to “fix” their life. For some clients, it was all about getting married. Other clients would tell me they feared they were getting too “old” to be considered the next Mark Zuckerberg.
And while my clients feared the big 3-0, they also felt like they were constantly missing out on something, that everyone else must be having more fun. They placed a lot of pressure on the idea that the 20-something years were supposed to be “the best years of their life.” They assumed being young and single in a big city meant lots of friends and lots of time to “hang out” and bond with those friends.
There was a huge disconnect between what the media and older generations experienced during their 20-something years and what it meant to be young for this generation. Millennials were the first generation to grow up in front of the entire world, thanks to technology. Being on display has definitely affected how they navigate the kinds of decisions that my generation (Gen X) got to make either privately or within a trusted circle of people who loved us.
Millennials were doing something that no sing