Discipline That Connects With Your Child's Heart

Jim Jackson, Lynne Jackson

Description

A Powerful Approach to Bringing God's Grace to Kids Did you know that the way we deal (or don't deal) with our kids' misbehavior shapes their beliefs about themselves, the world, and God? Therefore it's vital to connect with their hearts--not just their minds--amid the daily behavior battles.With warmth and grace, Jim and Lynne Jackson, founders of Connected Families, offer four tried-and-true keys to handling any behavioral issues with love, truth, and authority. You will learn practical ways to communicate messages of grace and truth, how to discipline in a way that motivates your child, and how to keep your relationship strong, not antagonistic. Discipline is more than just a short-term attempt to modify your child's actions--it's a long-term investment to help them build faith, wisdom, and character for life. When you discover a better path to discipline, you'll find a more well-behaved--and well-believed--kid.

Informations

• Publié par: Baker Publishing Group
• Date de parution: 20 septembre 2016
• Nombre de lectures: 0
• EAN13: 9781441230591
• Langue: English
• Poids de l'ouvrage: 1 Mo

Extrait

Cover
Title Page
Copyright Page
© 2012, 2016 by Jim and Lynne Jackson
Published by Bethany House Publishers
11400 Hampshire Avenue South
Bloomington, Minnesota 55438
www.bethanyhouse.com
Bethany House Publishers is a division of
Baker Publishing Group, Grand Rapids, Michigan
www.bakerpublishinggroup.com
Previously published by Connected Families
Ebook edition created 2016
Ebook corrections 09.20.2017
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means—for example, electronic, photocopy, recording—without the prior written permission of the publisher. The only exception is brief quotations in printed reviews.
Library of Congress Control Number: 2016938458
ISBN 978-1-4412-3059-1
Unless otherwise indicated, Scripture quotations are from the Holy Bible, New International Version®. NIV®. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.™ Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved worldwide. www.zondervan.com
Scripture quotations identified NLT are from the Holy Bible , New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.
Scripture quotations identified N A SB are from the New American Standard Bible®, copyright © 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission. ( www.Lockman.org )
Scripture quotations identified NRSV are from the New Revised Standard Version of the Bible, copyright © 1989, by the Division of Christian Education of the National Council of the Churches of Christ in the United States of America. Used by permission. All rights reserved.
Scripture quotations identified NKJV are from the New King James Version®. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved.
Scripture quotations identified T HE M ESSAGE are from THE MESSAGE. Copyright © by Eugene H. Peterson 1993, 1994, 1995, 1996, 2000, 2001, 2002. Used by permission of NavPress. All rights reserved. Represented by Tyndale House Publishers, Inc.
Some names and identifying details have been changed to protect the privacy of those involved.
Cover design by Dan Pitts
Cover photography by Getty Images
Authors are represented by WordServe Literary Group
Endorsements
“There’s nothing worse than feeling you’re losing the parenting battle. But there’s nothing better than having a roadmap away from all that hurt and toward closeness and health that you knew parenting could be like! You’ll find a way forward in this new book, and new look at connecting caring and correction that can change your and your child’s life. I highly recommend this to stressed-out and just-starting-out parents at all ages and stages.”
John Trent, PhD, Moody Theological Seminary; author, The Blessing and LifeMapping
“In the age of helicopter parenting and global anxiety about the future, Jim and Lynne Jackson bring a grace-filled message of hard-won wisdom for weary parents like me. Their four essential messages will connect with your kids and launch them into the world as confident and capable human beings.”
Steve Wiens, senior pastor, Genesis Covenant Church, Minneapolis; author, Beginnings: The First Seven Days of the Rest of Your Life
“ Discipline That Connects With Your Child’ s Heart has been more transformational for our family than any other book. The ‘peace process,’ in particular, has changed conflict from a wedge that drives us apart into an opportunity to grow together.”
Chad and Liz Caswell, changed parents of three
“The DTC material has been a game-changer with my family. Additionally, I have partnered with Connected Families as a pastor and military chaplain and have presented the material to my church and airmen families in base retreats. This is a biblical, practical, and simple approach to parenting.”
Capt. Michael Golay, chaplain, USAF
“This book has changed how I parent! Thank you to the Jacksons for sharing these needed actionable parenting strategies in an authentic and even vulnerable voice. I needed it. I used it. It worked. Thank you.”
David Horsager, CEO, Trust Edge Leadership Institute; bestselling author, The Trust Edge
“This is a ‘why’ book and a ‘how’ book. The Jacksons speak into a way of thinking, acting, and being that forms us and changes our collective character, habits, and practices. Parents will be helped. Children will be glad. Homes, schools, and communities will be transformed.”
Joel Johnson, senior pastor, Westwood Community Church, Minneapolis
“ Good , solid , practical advice and insights for parents — with some surprisingly simple and effective ways to discipline that may never have occurred to you . You ’ ll enjoy this book !”
Cynthia Ulrich Tobias , author , The Way They Learn and You Can’ t Make Me! ( But I Can Be Persuaded)
“The Jacksons empower parents to reframe ‘problem behaviors’ to invitations for connection with God, with each other, and with the needs of the world. They trumpet the call for parents to offer messages of safety, love, value, and responsibility while simultaneously examining their own lives. This is a great book!”
Dr. Denise Muir Kjesbo, PhD, Children and Family Ministry chair, Bethel College
“Typical parenting books offer strategies intended to control your child—what a setup! The Jacksons equip you with insights and practical tools to be the parent God created you to be. As parents lead with grace, kids follow and grow in wisdom and true respect. This book will bring peace and joy to you and your home.”
Peter Larson, PhD, and Heather Larson, MA, authors, 10 Great Dates : Connecting Faith , Love & Marriage
“Being the mom to four young boys, I’ve struggled to balance grace, training, and boundaries (often more like a mix of yelling, threatening, and frustration). Thankfully, God led me to Jim and Lynne Jackson and their straightforward approach in Discipline That Connects . Now I can confidently communicate the four messages while driving carpool, sitting around the dinner table, or tackling bedtime chaos.”
Heather MacFayden, blogger, God Centered Mom
“As the mom of three young (and full-of-life) kids, I want to prayerfully raise kids who follow God but who also choose love and connection over a bunch of shoulds and should-nots. Because of this, Discipline That Connects With Your Child’ s Heart immediately appealed to me. I was not disappointed—inside the pages I found helpful tips, connection-based ideas, and best of all the encouragement I needed to connect with my kids as I disciple them.”
Erin MacPherson, author, Christian Mama’ s Guide and Free to Parent
“It’s obvious after reading just a few pages of this book that the Jacksons know the true meaning of the word discipline : to train. Parents and caregivers alike will find practical help from the many stories and examples in each chapter on how to touch a child’s heart by helping them feel safe, loved, called and capable, and responsible. This book even helps a grandparent like me. I will be assigning it in my Family Ministry courses.”
Scottie May, PhD, associate professor, Wheaton College; author, Children Matter: Celebrating Their Place in the Church, Family, and Community
“A practical, proven, and powerful framework for parenting. Every concept and example in the book illuminates its central message: Love kids with the same grace and insight that we’ve received through Jesus. I intend to cherish this resource as a parent and will refer to it many times over.”
Matt Norman, regional president, Dale Carnegie Training; former 40 Under 40, Minneapolis/ St. Paul Business Journal
“In Discipline That Connects , we found not only an amazing philosophical parenting resource, but a non-formulaic, practical parenting discipleship tool. Our family is forever changed by applying these biblical princi ples to our parenting journey. We’ve gained peace, direction, and vision as we implement the book’s messages in our home.”
David and Michelle Swanson, transformed parents of five
Dedication
We dedicate this book to all the parents we’ve been privileged to journey alongside. Though you may have come to us for guidance, you have been our guides as well, sharing the stories of your lives and learning. Your hunger to grow and your Spirit-led applications of things we teach keep us ever humble, curious, and eager to serve more parents like you.
Contents
Cover 1
Title Page 3
Copyright Page 4
Endorsements 5
Dedication 7
Acknowledg ments 13
Foreword 15
Dear Reader 17
1. The Lessons Our Kids Truly Need 21
SECTION ONE: “You Are Safe With Me.” 29
2. Four Essential Messages 31
3. Forward Progress Begins With a Backward Step 39
4. Keeping My Kids Safe From My Baggage 48
5. Becoming a Calmer Parent 58
6. Renewing My Mind for Parenting 68
SECTION TWO: “You Are Loved, No Matter What.” 85
7. Misbehavior: The Golden Opportunity for Unconditional Love 87
8. Putting Love-No-Matter-What Into Action 100
9. Eternal Impact: When Love Begins to Rule 108
SECTION THREE: “You Are Called and Capable. 115
10. Finding and Building Strengths, Even in Misbehavior 117
11. Discovering Diamonds in the Rough 126
12. Building the Wisdom Kids Need 140
13. Problem-Solving and Skill-Building 150
SECTION FOUR: “You Are Responsible for Your Actions.” 159
14. The Goal of Biblical Discipline: Restoring Hearts 161
15. Reaping and Sowing: Natural Impacts 172
16. Understanding Why My Child Is Misbehaving 181
SECTION FIVE: Rebuilding and Reconciling 189
17. Rebuilding: What to Do When It Falls Apart 191
18. Conclusion: A Lasting Fix 201
APPENDIX: Wisdom for Specific Challenges 205
Section A: Self-Motivated, Responsible Kids 209
Messes 209
Chores 213
Poor Listening and Follow-Through 219
Homework and Grades 223
Screen Time 229
Section B: Peaceful Daily Routines 237
Mornings 237
Meals 241
Transitions/Leaving 2