Is That All He Thinks About?

Taviano Marla

Description

For many married women, their sex life is a source of frustration instead of the pleasure they expected. Author Marla Taviano believes most women need an attitude adjustment before they and their husbands will experience a fulfilling sex life.With candor, Marla helps women view sex God's way and:stop the "meet my needs; then I'll meet yours" mindsetcelebrate God's plan for women to be godly and sexualseek forgiveness for past sexual impurities and move onget creative, spice up lovemaking, and increase desireMarla debunks myths, calls women on their own issues, exposes the joy of sex, and presents hopeful advice that new or veteran brides will gratefully refer to again and again.

Informations

• Publié par: Harvest House Publishers, Inc.
• Date de parution: 01 janvier 2007
• Nombre de lectures: 0
• EAN13: 9780736932110
• Langue: English

Extrait

WARNING:
Put this book right back on the shelf if
A. You are a guy. (This book is for women only.)
B. You re a Christian, and you don t think Christians should read books about sex.
C. You are a married woman who has never once been too busy, tired, irritated, hurt, uninterested, upset, or selfish to cheerfully make love to her husband.
D. You are too embarrassed to take it up to the counter and buy it.
On second thought
If you re a married man and this book s title has intrigued you, buy it for your wife. (You can sneak peeks when she s not paying attention.)
If you re one who thinks sexual enjoyment is not for Christians, maybe you should read this book. You just might have a change of heart.
If you re shy about buying, do it just this once.
Oh, yeah-and if you fit in category C you re a fibber. You d better get the book.
Is That All He Thinks About?
Marla Taviano

HARVEST HOUSE PUBLISHERS
EUGENE, OREGON
Unless otherwise noted, all Scripture quotations are taken from the HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION . NIV . Copyright 1973, 1978, 1984 by the International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved.
Verses marked MSG are taken from The Message. Copyright by Eugene H. Peterson 1993, 1994, 1995, 1996, 2000, 2001, 2002. Used by permission of NavPress Publishing Group.
Cover by Garborg Design Works, Savage, Minnesota
Cover photo Itstock / Inmagine
IS THAT ALL HE THINKS ABOUT? Copyright 2007 by Marla Taviano Published by Harvest House Publishers Eugene, Oregon 97402 www.harvesthousepublishers.com
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Taviano, Marla, 1975-
Is that all he thinks about? / Marla Taviano.
p. cm.
ISBN-13: 978-0-7369-1898-5 (pbk.)
ISBN-10: 0-7369-1898-1 (pbk.)
1. Sex-Religious aspects-Christianity. 2. Men-Psychology. I. Title.
BT708.T38 2007
248.8 435-dc22
2006021725

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means-electronic, mechanical, digital, photocopy, recording, or any other-except for brief quotations in printed reviews, without the prior permission of the publisher.
Printed in the United States of America
07 08 09 10 11 12 13 14 15 / BP-CF / 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1
To Gabe, my very best friend. You re all I could ever want- in the bedroom and out.
And to our parents- Ron and Chris, and Rock and Janelle. Thirty-plus years of marriage and the passion still burns! You guys are our heroes!
Acknowledgments
A big hug and thank-you to all the brave and honest gals who filled out surveys or chatted with me personally. (Names have been changed and details disguised.) Your stories will undoubtedly touch many lives.
CONTENTS
Warning
Acknowledgments
What s in It for Me?
Let s Chat
A Fresh Perspective
1. The Conditions for Sex List
2. Male and Female He Created Them
3. And the Bible Says Get It On!
Roadblocks to Great Sex
4. Ghosts from the Past
5. Body Image Blues
6. When He s Not Interested
The Power of the Mind
7. Sex Drawers and Such
8. Are Orgasms Overrated?
9. The Admiration Effect
Lending Hubby a Hand
10. Don t Leave Him Guessing
11. The Other Kind of Sex
12. The Eyes of Men
Adding Little Ones to the Mix
13. Trying to Conceive
14. Baby Makes Three
15. Sex After Kids
Let the Good Times Roll!
16. Relighting the Fire
17. Sugar and Spice
18. The Bottom Line
A Final-and Honest-Word
Resources and References
From Blushing Bride to Wedded Wife
Other Books on Marriage by Harvest House Publishers
What s In It for Me?
Maybe you ve read a slew of books about sex. If so, you probably want a guarantee that if you decide to read this one, it won t end up sounding exactly the same as the last five.
I m not going to sit here and make empty promises.
Will you learn something new every paragraph? Mmm possibly. Will you laugh out loud at least two or three times a chapter? Umm it depends. Will you have an aha! moment that inspires you to a bigger and better life? Hmm hard to say.
By now you may be asking, So why should I read this book, for crying out loud?
Because you want the sex you share with your husband to be sweeter.
Now, this is not an exhaustive how-to manual, by any stretch, but I think you ll pick up a helpful tip or two throughout these pages.
This is a feel-good, sometimes-laugh-out-loud sort of book. More important, this book is based on a Christian worldview, not watered down or sugar-coated. I have also tried to strike a balance-straightforward but not sensational. My prayer from the outset was that I would be sensitive to God s leading as I wrote.
I do have lofty ideals for this book. I d love for you to finish the last page, take a deep sigh, and say, This is the first day of the rest of my marriage. I would love for you to forever see your husband, your marriage, our world and culture, with new eyes-and approach life with a new attitude.
Too bad life is not as simple as reading a book and-voil -instant marriage makeover! But books can definitely impact lives, and I do believe the Spirit of God can speak directly to your heart through my puny, human words (and the words I ve borrowed directly from Him).
Some parts might make you laugh, some will make you squirm, some will make you stop and think-and hopefully, some will make you stand up and take action. My hope is that, when all is said and done, you will walk away changed. And your marriage will be blessed.
And that is also my fervent prayer.
Let s Chat
W hy did I write this book?
Well, to be honest, God had made it clear to me that my sex life needed a boost. To write about sex, I knew I d have to read about it and think about it-two things that have proven to increase my sexual desire. My husband would be the recipient of a sexual double whammy. (No complaints from him, I might add.)
A lot of times, sad to say, my writing detracts from my libido. After a long day, the kids are finally in bed, and I want to sit and write until I collapse onto my own bed in exhaustion. I just can t work sex in (or so I say).
So, in an effort to please my husband and get my daily writing fix, why not combine work and pleasure and write a book about sex?
Doesn t your husband feel like you re using him? you want to know. Well, no, he doesn t. In fact, he d like me to use him a lot more often.
He actually can t quit grinning about the whole idea. He has just one stipulation. You can use me as a guinea pig for your research, he says, as long as the experiments continue when the book is done!
He also likes the whole tax write-off idea. You know, since I m writing a book about sex, I can legitimately spend tax-free dollars on research materials. (I ll make a note to check the tax laws. I d hate to try explaining to my accountant why whipped cream and edible panties showed up as business expenses in my tax records for this year.)

When my friends and family first heard the title of my previous book (From Blushing Bride to Wedded Wife), they often jumped to an incorrect conclusion-that my choice of subject matter must mean I viewed myself as an expert on the topic of marriage.
Then they read the book.
They soon realized that the recurring theme throughout my writing is this: If I must boast I will boast of the things that show my weakness. *
So, now that I ve written a book about sex, am I a self-proclaimed sex expert with a to-die-for sex life? Or will I again be writing about my struggles and weaknesses in a particular area of my life?
Just start reading chapter 1, and it won t take you long to figure it out.
As I write, I remind myself, Cover this in prayer. Ask God to humble you. There s really no guarantee anyone will even buy, let alone like, your book. It s fine to share truth in a fun way, but without His help and blessing, lives will never be affected or changed. And so I have committed to pray for this book from its inception to its publication and beyond. And many other women are praying as well.
And while I m in prayer mode, I m praying for my own sex life, too-for a better attitude, more desire, more energy, more unselfishness-because I m realizing more each day that I need God s help to make this work. Many days I find it much easier to sit down at my desk and write about sex than go upstairs and have it.
We re in This Together, Sister
You and I are a lot alike. Though I can t speak for you completely, if it were up to me, I d put my own needs and desires first 100 percent of the time. I love the Lord, I love my husband but I struggle with selfishness, a lack of sexual desire, and making sex a priority in my busy life.
God tells us in the Bible that sex is a requirement for married people-not an optional activity. But He never suggests it should be given begrudgingly, out of a sense of duty. In fact, He seems to think it is something incredible-a delightful act that can bring us loads of pleasure as long as we both shall live. Wow.
Most of you don t have the luxury of writing about sex for a living. But you can read about it, and that s part of the reason I wrote this book. Just reading it will help enhance your desire and breathe new life into your relationship with your husband. And if you take it a step further and act on what you ve read-then wow!
We re not talking about a walk in the park here-it s more like a hike. You re gonna sweat a bit. Your muscles are gonna ache a little. But the good news is, we re going to journey together, supporting each other every step of the way. And when we get to the top, the view will be glorious!
Let s go, girl!

* 2 Corinthians 11:30.
A FRESH PERSPECTIVE
Chapter 1
The Conditions for Sex List
A t one point last year, my husband and I were struggling in the bedroom. I was less than thrilled about making love. He wanted to know why I wasn t in the mood.
What can I do to make you want sex more? he asked.
Ahh the very question I d been waitin