Real Deal on Love and Men

Michelle Mckinney Hammond

Description

Bestselling author Michelle McKinney Hammond (1.5 million relationship books sold) fields women's questions on love, men, dating, and marriage. With her unique "tell it like it is" style and compassionate understanding, Michelle helps readers navigate the male/female maze, including: "Get a Life"--Finding and creating opportunities to meet godly men "The Man/Woman Thing"--Understanding and appreciating gender differences "Closing the Deal"--Identifying deal breakers and deal makers while dating "Cheating, Lying, and Other Love Traps"--When to stay and when to leave "New Beginnings"--Gleaning wisdom from setbacks and then moving on "Marriage"--Exploring expectations and establishing traditions Everyone wants a love relationship, so why is it so hard to find and keep? Michelle answers the question and explores the ins and outs of love. "It's time to get down to the nitty-gritty and find out what makes love happen...It's time to engage our brains while following our hearts."

Informations

• Publié par: Harvest House Publishers, Inc.
• Date de parution: 01 septembre 2013
• Nombre de lectures: 0
• EAN13: 9780736949590
• Langue: English

Extrait

HARVEST HOUSE PUBLISHERS
EUGENE, OREGON
Unless otherwise indicated, Scripture quotations are taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version , NIV . Copyright 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011, by Biblica, Inc. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved worldwide. www.zondervan.com
Verses marked NASB are taken from the New American Standard Bible , 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission. ( www.Lockman.org )
Verses marked TLB are taken from The Living Bible, Copyright 1971. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, IL 60189 USA. All rights reserved.
Verses marked AMP are taken from The Amplified Bible, Copyright 1954, 1958, 1962, 1964, 1965, 1987 by The Lockman Foundation. All rights reserved. Used by permission. ( www.Lockman.org )
Verses marked MSG are taken from The Message. Copyright by Eugene H. Peterson 1993, 1994, 1995, 1996, 2000, 2001, 2002. Used by permission of NavPress Publishing Group.
Verses marked NLT are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright 1996, 2004, 2007 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.
Verses marked ESV are from The ESV Bible (The Holy Bible, English Standard Version ), copyright 2001 by Crossway, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved.
Verses marked NKJV are taken from the New King James Version. Copyright 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved.
Cover illustrations iStockphoto / Thinkstock
Cover by Koechel Peterson Associates, Inc., Minneapolis, Minnesota
Michelle McKinney Hammond is represented by the literary agency of Alive Communications, Inc., 7680 Goddard Street, Ste #200, Colorado Springs, CO 80920. www.alivecommunications.com .
THE REAL DEAL ON LOVE AND MEN
Copyright 2013 by Michelle McKinney Hammond
Published by Harvest House Publishers Eugene, Oregon 97402
www.harvesthousepublishers.com
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
McKinney Hammond, Michelle
The real deal on love and men / Michelle McKinney Hammond.
pages cm
ISBN 978-0-7369-4958-3 (pbk.)
ISBN 978-0-7369-4959-0 (eBook)
1. Man-woman relationships-Religious aspects-Christianity. 2. Love-Religious aspects-Christianity. 3. Men-Psychology. 4. Women-Psychology. I. Title.
BT705.8.M42 2013
241 .6765-dc23
2013012421
All rights reserved. No part of this electronic publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means-electronic, mechanical, digital, photocopy, recording, or any other-without the prior written permission of the publisher. The authorized purchaser has been granted a non-transferable, non-exclusive, and non-commercial right to access and view this electronic publication and agrees to do so only in accordance with the terms of use under which it was purchased or transmitted. Participation in or encouragement of piracy of copyrighted materials in violation of author s and publisher s rights is strictly prohibited.
To all those who long to find love that lasts.
To those who just want a real, truthful, and practical dialogue on how to navigate through the curious path of dating, mating, and relating.
To those who have very real questions on matters of the heart.
This book is for you. Hopefully I ve answered some of your questions or at least given you enough information to lead you to the answers you need for your love life.
Jesus said, You will know the truth, and the truth will set you free. Here s to liberating your heart and educating your mind so you can find the love you ve been looking for and make the best life choices.
Acknowledgments
Here s to all those who work tirelessly to help make me a better writer, to encourage me to dig deeper, and to remind me to keep it real.
To those who keep asking me questions that spur on meaningful conversations with you, my readers.
To my Harvest House family who continues to support me and encourage me to keep sharing from the Word and from my heart. I couldn t do this without you.
Contents
Acknowledgments
Time to Get Heart Smart
1. The Power of One
2. Me, Myself, and
3. Get a Life
4. The Right Stuff
5. Mind over Palpitations
6. The Man/Woman Thing
7. Fact or Fiction?
8. Friends and Lovers
9. Love Web Style
10. Dating, Mating, and Relating
11. Great Expectations
12. In Search of Mr. Right
13. The Question Is
14. Setting Boundaries
15. The Big V
16. Sex
17. Closing the Deal
18. The Language of Love
19. Then Comes Marriage
20. Cheating, Lying, and Other Love Traps
21. The Unacceptable Dilemma
22. The Big D
23. New Beginnings
24. Ultimate Love
25. One More Question
To Contact Michelle
More Encouraging Books by Michelle McKinney Hammond
Time to Get Heart Smart
F rom the time Adam and Eve got booted out of the Garden of Eden, relationships have been a mystery that men and women have talked about, sung about, ruminated over, and struggled with. Love has often been the elephant in the room-hard to ignore yet tough to conquer. How could something that everyone wants be so hard to find and keep? That is the million-dollar question.
In an effort to find and keep love, I believe we ve grown far too polite in our approach. We talk around, over, and under the issue with potential partners. Afraid of stepping on toes and scaring each other away, we fail to ask the questions we should, set the boundaries we need, and have the conversations that are crucial to discerning whether this love is the one we want and deserve. It s time to flip the script on dancing around the issue! Let s have a down to the nitty-gritty discussion about what makes love happen and what destroys it. Let s discover how to approach love using our brains while following our hearts.
Over the years I ve penned quite a few relationship books, including What to Do Until Love Finds You , Secrets of an Irresistible Woman , How to Be Found by the Man You ve Been Looking For , 101 Ways to Get and Keep His Attention , and What Women Don t Know and Men Don t Tell You. You wouldn t believe some of the mail I ve received in response. Some people want to share their comments, their thoughts, and their love lives. Some ask questions that make me scratch my head and ask, Chile, did you read my book? But I do get it. People read my books and then write to ask questions I ve already addressed because they hope I ll give them a different answer. After all, their situations are special, aren t they? Yeah, right!
Trust me, there are no special situations really. Only our propensity to complicate life and love much more than necessary by trying to write our own scripts rather than follow the laws of the Spirit that hold true whether we like them or not. There are very basic principles that apply to life and love. When we stick to the program and apply the principles to our lives, they will work for us. If we don t, we blow it big time. The bottom line is most people allow their decisions to be based on their emotions instead of making smart choices and then making their emotions line up with that. This creates a huge problem called disappointment or, in clearer terms, heartbreak because the desired end isn t achieved. Then we want special advice and help for what is really a basic problem. Though it might not feel very basic at the time, if we honestly assess our situation, we would have to admit that a basic principle was violated or a clear cue was ignored that led us and our hearts to a place of pain.
Perhaps you were truly innocent and wouldn t have recognized the cues if they d walked up and slapped you in the face. That is possible. Love is the one vocation in life that no one studies for. We often learn some of our cues from unrealistic movies where people have magical encounters and passionate love affairs without any of the work needed to secure love in real life or any of the consequences of violating God s principles when the music stops playing.
Unfortunately, you probably do have to know a few things your mama might not have told you about to get the love you want and need. Though you must include spiritual principles in your love repertoire, love can t be solely spiritualized. A balance of pragmatism and practicality must be blended with the spiritual side to get the best outcome in every area of your life. In other words, don t just follow your heart. You need to also listen to the Holy Spirit and use your head.
So here are my tell the truth and shame the devil answers to many of the questions I ve fielded over the years. Hopefully the information will help you navigate your search for love with better results than what you ve been getting. No one likes the taste of medicine, but when you take it you get well. So stop nursing and rehearsing unhealthy habits that keep you in a state of flux about love. It s time to get heart smart and love wise once and for all.
What s the real deal on love and men? Dig in, my friend. I m not afraid to tell the truth, and the truth has been known to set sisters free!
1
The Power of One
I m lonely so lonely I don t need to peel an onion to cry. This is a line from a poem I wrote many years ago. Looking back, I think, How pitiful is that? What could have made me plummet to the depths of writing something so morose? It came from a place of deep disappointment that once again I d found myself at the end of yet another failed relationship. The future looked bleak. I couldn t see a positive today, much less tomorrow. I was alone and unloved. Neither state was the truth, but that was how I felt in the moment. Unfortunately, I allowed those untruths to consume me. The emptiness was excruciating.
Loneliness is a sad affair, and that s the gospel truth. But ask me why. Why, Michelle? Why is life this