Doctors are a drain on society

Richard Villar

Description

It is a natural assumption that authors who have published numerous scientific papers have also acquired mastery of the written word. Yet sadly this is not always the case. Talk to many journal editors and they will say that a number of the submissions they receive fail because an interesting finding has simply been presented in a poor way. The Cambridge Orthopaedic Writing Prize was created to allow freedom of written expression and to encourage trainees, authors, writers - call them what you will - to have fun, to play with their language and, at the same time, to compete. The end game, of course, is for the quality of scientific submissions to improve; for entrants to realise that you can influence a reviewer's judgment simply by improving the language and presentation of submitted research. There are no prizes for hopeless complexity. How can one expect a reviewer to focus on a paper that is badly written? Not a hope. Reviewers are human, too.For the 2013 prize, the judges were bowled over with the professionalism and content of the submissions. Each one, in their view, was utterly brilliant.

Sujets

• Médecine

Informations

• Publié par: eBookPartnership.com
• Date de parution: 20 juin 2014
• Nombre de lectures: 0
• EAN13: 9781783014552
• Langue: English
• Poids de l'ouvrage: 1 Mo

Extrait

DOCTORS ARE A DRAIN ON SOCIETY
2014 The copyright remains with the authors
The authors have asserted their rights in accordance with the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988 to be identified as the authors of this work.
Published by eBookPartnership.com
First published in eBook format in 2014
ISBN: 978-1-7830-1455-2
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All names, characters, places, organisations, businesses and events are either the product of the author s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.
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Table of Contents
Foreword
Acknowledgements
Winner
Runner-up
Runner-up
Essay 1
Essay 2
Essay 3
Essay 4
Essay 5
Essay 6
Essay 7
Essay 8
Essay 9
Essay 10
Essay 11
Essay 12
Essay 13
Essay 14
Essay 15
Essay 16
Essay 17
Essay 18
Essay 19
Essay 20
Essay 21
Essay 22
Essay 23
Essay 24
Foreword
By Richard Villar
It is a natural assumption that authors who have published numerous scientific papers have also acquired mastery of the written word. Yet sadly this is not always the case. Talk to many journal editors and they will say that a number of the submissions they receive fail because an interesting finding has simply been presented in a poor way. However good the idea, however well conducted the research, the paper has fallen at the final hurdle for no reason other than being written badly. No reader should have to struggle to understand an author s words.
At this point enter the Cambridge Orthopaedic Writing Prize, created to allow freedom of written expression and to encourage trainees, authors, writers - call them what you will - to have fun, to play with their language and, at the same time, to compete. The end game, of course, is for the quality of scientific submissions to improve; for entrants to realise that you can influence a reviewer s judgment simply by improving the language and presentation of submitted research. There are no prizes for hopeless complexity. How can one expect a reviewer to focus on a paper that is badly written? Not a hope. Reviewers are human, too.
For this year s prize, the judges were bowled over with the professionalism and content of the submissions. Each one, in their view, was utterly brilliant. Read them for yourself on the pages that follow and see what you think. Blood was almost spilt when it came to making the decision as to who might win. Indeed, from the six judges, there were almost as many views as there were prize entries. So if you have entered but on this occasion failed to either win or become a runner-up, please be absolutely assured that your entry was well read, much appreciated and hugely enjoyed.
It goes without saying that a prize such as this would be impossible without you, the entrants and readers and, of course, the judges. Each judge has devoted many hours of labour to read, reread, analyse and read again to be sure that every submission has been given a fair airing. Have the judges enjoyed themselves? Of course they have. They are all busy people but have made time to help turn this writing prize from concept to reality; a huge vote of thanks from me.
So read on and see what you think. All the entries are here, largely anonymised for reasons that will perhaps become clear as you peruse. The allocated topic for this prize was Doctors are a drain on society and entrants were given freedom to present their words in whatever form they wished. Key to the prize was the ability to write exactly 1000 words. That is the hard part as it is almost impossible to write precisely 1000 words straight off. To do so demands an initial write, based on an original idea, and then a serious edit. This is difficult, even for professional writers, so for orthopaedic trainees it is outstanding.
Oh yes, I almost forgot. Next year? Of course there is a next year. I very much hope past entrants will enter again and those who did not enter will decide to have a go. After all, what is there to lose? There could be everything to gain. The title has once more been the result of much discussion and here it is.
The title for the Cambridge Orthopaedic Writing Prize 2014 is....
Healthy living sucks
So go on then, give it a go. Precisely 1000 words, any genre, and in our Inbox by the 31st December 2014. Full entry details are on our web site http://cambridgeorthoprize.com
My wholehearted congratulations to you all.
Richard Villar
Cambridge London, UK
Acknowledgements
A huge amount of work goes into a prize such as this. It is not just a matter of turning up on the day. It is also highly likely, as I start to name the key individuals who have helped with this initiative, that I upset someone by failing to give them due credit. Forgive me, therefore, if that someone is you. However, the prize simply would not have taken off without the help, from beginning to end, of Rosie Browne. She has been a star from the start, so thank you Rosie. The judges, too, have been wonderful. You come from all sorts of background, some literary, some not. So my wholehearted thanks to Homa Arshad, Ali Bajwa, Jo Burch, Jeya Palan, Ramsay Refaie, and Rob Roger. How can I ever thank you enough?
Winner
Doctors are a drain on society. Perhaps we are. The social hub of society is The Dinner Party and I am certainly a drain at dinner parties. The smart, yet casual, social haunt of anyone with a degree and a job that earns them over 20k. Whilst everyone discusses the latest office gossip and chortles about business meetings that ended with Jerry stood on the table serenading the Princess of Sweden! I am there, pale from living a nearly nocturnal life on nights and probably riddled with scurvy having given up all food except for toast from the mess.
So how is your job as a DOCTOR? Oh perfect I ve been on-call so managed to hold a wee in for 12 hours and walked around for 4 hours today with an old ladies blood on my face thanks to an overzealous ortho registrar with a saw and an intracapsular NOF! You would think someone would have told me... I had them at blood and lost them at ortho registrar . Smug James who works in The City has suddenly lost his appetite for the rare steak we are all enjoying and my non-medic friends once again push food round their plates and wonder when I m next on-call.
We certainly are a drain on ink at the tabloid printers. Tabloid newspapers appear to be the fodder of society. What society grazes on whilst utilising the public transport system. When they have finally run out of stories about Princess Diana and have completed 50 shades of xenophobia we often are allowed our 15 minutes of fame. Doctors More Hated Than Bankers ... apparently. I m certain I would take this national disgust much better from the padded leather seats of my private jet after back to back meetings in Deutsche Bank s pools of gold.
Everyone in society also loves a good Doctor Missed My Unpronounceable Eponymous Syndrome tale; what failures we are. Between magazines showing hideous scars from botched boob jobs in Bradford to demonic doctors poisoning their lovers we make flashy and disgraceful headlines. Our mumbling faux empathy and fatigued demeanour is no match for the newspapers Tuesday Medical Section or indeed Dr. Google. Dr. Google (although often telling porky pies) gives free, instant, unapologetic answers and never botches a boob job. He certainly is not a drain on society; unlike us.
When society isn t feeding off news and discussing it over dinner tables they are happily procreating in wholesome homes. Whether in straight marriages or gay partnerships our society is seemingly built upon the notion that we need to be happily cohabiting with a binding legal contract for life; and with child (or many) to be complete. I m not. In fact doctors are terrors for the dreaded D word ... divorce. I can close my eyes in a busy hospital canteen and decipher immediately which tables are hosting doctors, indeed which species of doctor. We can t find a weekend in our rotas for the next 8 months where we are both free to get married! certainly the medical registrar, my ex-wife is taking our children to Lake Como this summer Surgical Consultant, my second ex-wife is taking our children to Lake Como this summer Orthopaedic Consultant.
Our hours, exams and terrible dinner party chat make us our own home wreckers. We are contributing to broken Britain through divorce and absent parenting. Our children will act up in class because they are lacking role models, we are never home and when we are we are tired. Hello, this is the scrub sister can I take a message the doctor is scrubbed? Yes. I will tell her. Sorry to interrupt, your son Damian has bitten another child in Primary 4 and then proceeded to eat all the purple crayons in a fit of rage. The school would like you to come in please and take him home. Oh bugger, can I get a 4-0 vicryl please and can you call them back please and ask them to call the nanny.
I have neglected to mention how we drain the foundation of society, the glue holding us all together in the colony and no, it s not love or a beautiful desire to work symbiotically with one another (you only need to get on the Tube in rush hour to thank God it doesn t rely on this). It is money. That piece of paper with the queen s face stamped on is what holds the whole show together. We drain that. Large amount