'Til Debt Do Us Part

Barnhill Julie Ann

Description

Using her perceptive heart, artful pen, and very personal experiences, Julie Barnhill helps couples face their fiscal foul-ups and discover how much God loves them. Julie shares how she and her husband grew apart because of debt, and what they have done to bridge not just the financial gap, but the emotional one as well. Approachable, humorous, and frank, this guide will help readers-- understand how finances have affected their marriage relationship face the heart issues that keep them in discontent and budget bondage find life after debt Here couples will learn how to move away from the emotional abyss of finances and move toward honesty, healing, and real life change.

Sujets

• Personal finance

Informations

• Publié par: Harvest House Publishers, Inc.
• Date de parution: 01 juillet 2002
• Nombre de lectures: 0
• EAN13: 9780736949217
• Langue: English
• Poids de l'ouvrage: 2 Mo

Extrait

’Til Debt Do Us Part

Julie Ann Barnhill

Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture quotations are taken from the New American Standard Bible ®, © 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995 by The Lockman Founda- tion. Used by permission.

Verses marked NIV are taken from the Holy Bible: New International Version®. NIV®. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by the International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan Pub- lishing House. The “NIV” and “New International Version” trademarks are registered in the United States Patent and Trademark Office by International Bible Society.

Verses marked NKJV are taken from the New King James Version. Copyright ©1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

The Scripture quotation from Song of Solomon 4:9 on page 143 is from the NIV .

The titles of chapters 19 through 24 are adapted from 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 as rendered in The Message. Copyright © by Eugene H. Peterson 1993, 1994, 1995. Used by permission of NavPress Publishing Group. All rights reserved.

Published in association with the literary agency of Alive Communications, Inc., 7680 Goddard St., Suite 200, Colorado Springs, CO 80920.

Cover by Terry Dugan Design, Minneapolis, Minnesota

’TIL DEBT DO US PART Copyright © 2002 by Julie Ann Barnhill Published by Harvest House Publishers Eugene, Oregon 97402

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data Barnhill, Julie Ann, 1965- ’Til debt do us part / Julie Ann Barnhill. p. cm. Includes bibliographical references. ISBN 0-7369-0899-4 1. Marriage—Economic aspects. 2. Marriage—Religious aspects—Christianity. 3. Married people—Finance, Personal. 4. Debt—Psychological aspects. I. Title.

HQ734 .B2497 2002 306.81—dc21

2001059380

All rights reserved.No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means—electronic, mechanical, digital, photocopy, recording, or any other—except for brief quotations in printed reviews, without the prior permission of the pub- lisher.

Printed in the United States of America

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C ONTENTS

True Confessions … 9 You Might Be a Financial Loser … 17

Part One: Debtly Sins.. Debtly Sin #1: Avoiding Money & Marriage Realities 1. Magnetic Personalities … 25 2. The Crowded Altar … 35 3. The Last Taboo … 47

Debtly Sin #2: Unrealistic Expectations 4. Once Upon a Marriage … 55 5. Fractured Fairy Tales … 67

Debtly Sin #3: Crafty Communications 6. Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell … 75 7. The Art of Compassionate Censorship … 81

Debtly Sin #4: Trivial Pursuits 8. I Possess, Therefore I Am … 91 9. You Look Marvelous! … 97

Debtly Sin #5: Discontent 10. Fun House Mirrors … 105 11. A Little Perspective, Please … 113 12. All I Need … 119

Debtly Sin #6: Regret 13. Shoulda, Woulda, Coulda … 127 14. Letting Go … 135

Debtly Sin #7: Giving Up 15. Exit, Stage Left … 143 16. A Covenant Commitment … 147

Part Two: Chapter 13 Relief.. 17. A Very Good Place to Start … 155 18. Love Is Patient … 161 19. Love Isn’t Always “Me First” (Ouch!) … 167 20. Love Takes Pleasure in the Flowering of Truth … 173 21. Love Trusts God Always … 179 22. Love Doesn’t Want What It Doesn’t Have … 183 23. Love Never Looks Back … 187 24. Love Keeps Going Until the End … 191

Appendix: Recommended Reading and Other Helpful Resources … 197

Notes … 203

To all the debtly sinners

True Confessions

Once upon a time I found the following items in my family’s mailbox: A) an “insufficient funds” notice in regard to my husband’s and my joint checking account; B) a handwritten note from a local business man- ager asking us, “Whatareyour plans regarding the outstanding balance on this account?”; and C) a note from my mother reminding me to pay the interest on a loan I had at my hometown bank. (Now really, should a 30-something mother of three need a note from her mother?) Then, to top everything off, the interest check that I hadalready mailed was lost (honest to goodness) in the labyrinth of the U.S. Postal Service and landed—eight days after its due date in Missouri—in a PO box somewhere west of the Mississippi!

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’Til Debt Do Us Part

Okay, the payment was late and was incurring interest. I was also looking at an outstanding balance of nearly $1200 with a local business manager, and it wouldn’t have surprised me a bit if our local banking officers had issued a warrant for my arrest. My head felt like it was going to blow up, and I was ready to scream. Come to think of it, I did. I also cried and ranted and raved (the house was empty, the windows were closed), and I prayed—sort of. More of a spiritual lament, really. It sounded something like this:

“God! I am so tired of all the financial stress in my marriage! I’m tired of juggling and shuffling and two-stepping. I’m tired of doing my best and failing! No matter how hard I try or how often I vow to get it rightthispay period orthistax season, our marriage seems to be stuck in a financial waste- land. Rick says we ‘just need more money,’ but God, you know no matter how much or how little we have coming in month-to-month, it never seems to be enough! There has to be more to this problem than our just needing more money.”

Disappearing Isn’t the Answer Sigh. You too may be one of the thousands of Christian hus- bands and wives who—while knowing all sorts of money management do’s and don’ts—still haven’t been able to keep yourselves out of the monetary muck. And you may be one of many (including me) who—upon remembering those mistakes, pressures, and failures—find themselves wanting to run as far from the problems as possible. Dis- connecting the phone, setting fire to the piles of envelopes